3. Contract

I woke in the middle of the day to Molly calling my name from downstairs. I'd left the window open last night, wanting to feel the rainy air, and it was quite cold in my room. The sunlight was meagre, eking through the autumn clouds, but it was enough to see by. I sat up and blinked–my sleep had been free of nightmares, but uneasy.

"Wilma!" Molly shouted again. "Wilma, come downstairs!"

"Coming!" I shouted.

I walked to the window and shut it. When I looked out, I saw Remus walking across the field towards the house.

My heart stuttered, and was suddenly racing. In a panic I ran out of my room to the loo and washed my face and hands. I changed out of Fred's shirt into my own clothes, a big green jumper and loose trousers. I was on my way out the door when I heard Fred's voice. A gleeful whisper. Jumper's on backwards!

I heard myself moan with frustration, and violently switched the jumper around, saying "Piss off" out loud to myself.

I checked myself once in the mirror, which I hadn't done in ages, and finally left the room. I walked downstairs at a reasonable pace, trying to look like I hadn't just woken up, like I wasn't afraid.

He was wearing his old tweed jacket. He'd cleaned up a bit and I couldn't smell the alcohol on him. He looked up at me when I paused on the landing, a sharpness in his eyes. I realised that he could probably hear my heartbeat if he tried. There was no point in hiding my nerves, but I at least wanted to appear reasonable. If I'd allowed myself to express my feelings, I'd have been trembling on the floor.

Molly looked at me with stress in her face. "There you are. Why don't you finish the tea and I'll get back to my gardening." And she went out the door.

I only glanced at Remus before going to the stove and taking over the tea, grateful for something to distract myself with. I directed a heating charm at the kettle until the water came to a boil. Out of the corner of my eye I looked at the clock. An hour before noon.

"Good morning," I said, to break the silence.

"Good morning," he repeated. I felt gratitude towards him. He was trying to make this easier.

"Have a seat, if you like."

"I'm alright standing."

There was quiet in the kitchen as I finished the tea. I could hear Molly talking to herself outside, and Ginny and Harry speaking quietly upstairs. George was still away, and I assumed Ron and Hermione had gone out for the day. Arthur was off working, helping to restore Hogwarts. I felt very alone with Remus.

He took a spot of milk and no sugar. I suggested we go to the sitting room, and he followed me there. I sat in a chair and gestured to the sofa, where Remus sat down rather awkwardly. The dim rays of the sun seeped into the room, and there was a low wind in the eaves.

"Sent your letters, then?" I said.

Of course, I already knew why he was here. If he'd gotten an affirmative reply from any of the others, he would have sent me a letter to tell me so. His presence meant that I was his only one. Reality sunk in, and I tried to make it seem like the blood hadn't drained from my head. My ears began to ring as I looked at him, and waited for him to say it.

But he was just as poorly off as me. "Would you…" he tried, his eyes quietly desperate. "Would you…" But he couldn't say it.

Fred's voice spoke in the back of my mind, like a soft fog. Go on, Willa, he said. Go on. It's alright.

I hung on, waiting for more, but he was gone. I studied the man across the room, and he held my gaze. I felt my lips part, felt the breath enter my body. I was seconds from saying it.

"Before you speak," he said suddenly, "I need you to understand. I love a ghost."

Pain blossomed in my chest, and I almost looked down to see if I was bleeding. "So do I."

He had seen Fred and me together only a few times, but I saw it in his eyes as he remembered. He nodded, seeming ashamed.

"I will marry you, Remus."

It was suddenly very hard to look at him.

"Alright," he said.

"Let's sign the papers," I said.

"Alright."

I stood up. "They're in my room. I'll bring them."

We had to try three quills before one worked, testing them on a spare piece of parchment.

"I'll sign first," Remus offered. Relieved, I handed him the quill and the ministry form. He turned, holding the parchment against the wall, and signed.

Fred had wanted to get married after I left school. I loved him with all my heart, and had still been nervous about such a commitment. I knew almost nothing about Remus and his life. Not really. And now we would be husband and wife. It was all backwards.

He handed the parchment and the quill back to me, and looked down at his precise signature. I knelt by the low table, touching the parchment. Suddenly my quill hand wouldn't move. I could only stare mutely at the blank line where my name was to go.

"What's wrong?" Remus said, his voice both sharp and quiet.

I shook my head, still unable to speak. I stared at my hand, willing it to move, but it refused.

"There are plenty of reasons to hesitate," he said. "I'm just asking which one."

One reason did surface in my mind, but I didn't think I should say it, for fear of offending him. I looked up, and he was watching me expectantly.

I wanted to be as sensitive as I could. "Is Teddy…"

The look on Remus's face turned dark. Clearly, I had approached the question wrong. I feared for a moment that he would snap at me, but he didn't. There was only a tense pause.

"Go on," he said. "Is he what?"

I shook my head, wishing I'd never spoken.

"You're going to have to say it, Wilma, I'd rather not read your mind."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, that would be a bit invasive, wouldn't it?" His tone was biting, and it hurt more because I knew he was right. It had been invasive of me to ask about his son's condition. My vision pulsed red, and I realised I was holding back tears.

"Excuse me," I said.

Then I was running out of the house and across the field. Molly shouted after me, but I didn't hear her words. I kept running until I was in the trees, and even then I couldn't stop.

My body was burning by the time I came to the river. Cold and grey, swirling with the chill wind. Gasping with tears, I walked along the water to the spot where I'd used to hide when I first came to live with the Weasleys as a ten year old. A nook between two large tree roots, where I still fit. The trunk blocked some of the wind, and I stared for a long time at the water and the falling leaves, hugging my knees.

I thought of how considerate Severus had been the other day. I imagined writing to him, telling him to come and take me away. The thought was followed quickly by guilt. Remus and I were more alike than I wanted to acknowledge. Both of us hurt, both of us grieving. Our match would be no fairy tale, but neither of us really had another choice. It just seemed hopeless. I didn't imagine that we would ever be in the same room without having some kind of a fight.

I knew that, like me, Remus took things too deeply and personally to heart. Though what had happened in the sitting room hadn't even been a real argument, it felt like one. My one slip up might necessitate a few days of recovery.

I sat there until the only thing going through my head was the sound of the river. An hour or so had gone by when I heard footsteps behind me. It was Remus.

He stood near me, also staring at the water, his hands hidden in his pockets. "You wanted to know if he's a werewolf."

"Yes," I admitted.

"He isn't. Can't be inherited."

"So if we…"

"No. It wouldn't be… like me."

I couldn't deny the relief that coursed through me. "Alright," I said.

"You'll sign now?"

"I will."

Back in the house, I stood at the kitchen table and signed my name below his. I folded the parchment into an envelope, and sent it off with Errol to the Ministry.

I stood at the window, watching until the owl was only a dark brown spot in the sky.

"The Ministry will send another letter soon, with further instructions," I said, half to myself. "That's what happened when Harry and Ginny sent theirs in."

Remus suddenly looked quite faint. He pressed his hand to his forehead and sank into a chair, staring numbly at the table.

"Are you alright?" I asked, stupidly.

He waved his hand, but weakly, and I hurried to get him a glass of water. I sat down beside him, seeing for the first time how thin he was. "Thank you," he said, sipping from the glass. He was trembling a little, and I didn't know what to do. "Have you got any chocolate?"

I found a bar in the cupboard and brought it to him. He broke off a small piece with trembling fingers, and put it in his mouth. I stayed with him.

After a minute or two he seemed better. "Sorry about that," he said.

"It's alright."

Molly came in from the garden with a full basket. "Remus," she said. "Will you stay for lunch?"

"Thank you, Molly, but I–"

"Nonsense," she said. "You'll stay for lunch."

"We decided," I said. "The contract's sent."

Molly looked between us, something hidden behind her eyes. "Congratulations," she said, and began to rinse the vegetables.

Later, after Remus had apparated back to his cottage, I wrote a letter to Severus telling him that I was spoken for. I received his response later that night. It read, simply,

My best wishes.

Severus Snape