Waiter There's A Baby In My Soup

Tommy frowned as he looked up at his daddy's dresser. Hanging up there was his daddy's tie, which Tommy LOVED to play with. It had pretty colors and it felt so smooth against his hands. He really enjoyed was sticking it in the potty. It would get really wet and he could whirl it around, getting water everywhere! It always made him giggle.

But after the first few times he'd done that daddy had started putting his ties high up, where Tommy couldn't reach them. He frowned, wiggling his bottom, before reaching up to climb the dresser. He saw it as a mountain and at the very time was the tie-

"Oh!" Suddenly the mountain disappeared and Tommy was pulled away from the dresser, his daddy carrying him to the bed. "Sorry champ, but that's not safe." His daddy put on his tie and Tommy began to fuss. "Aw, what's the matter, champ?" Stu asked, checking to make sure Tommy wasn't wet. The baby tried to grab at the tie but Stu simply shifted him away, causing the infant to sob more. "Let's get you down to mommy, okay?" Tommy continued to sob as they went down to the kitchen, mean daddy ruining his planned toilet/tie fun.

"What's the matter, baby?" Didi asked, taking Tommy from Stu. Forgetting about the tie Tommy decided it would be fun to play with the pots and pans, maybe dig in the trash… only for his mommy to put him in his highchair, thinking he was hungry.

A horn honked outside and Lou grinned as he headed out for his date just as the phone rang and Tiffany, the babysitter, canceled.

"Well Tiffany, I think we'll have to find a different babysitter then. You just aren't reliable." Didi hunt up before the teen could make another excuse. "Well, I guess we'll have to take Tommy with us."

Stu though shook his head. "Come on, Didi, Chas is just a few doors down… so are the DeVilles. We babysit for them they can easily take Tommy. This is a very important meeting!"

"I guess you're right."

Later that evening Tommy sat with Phil and Lil, rolling one of their balls about. "Hey guys… ever get the feeling that you are missing out on the funs stuff?"

"Whaddya mean?" Phil asked.

"I don't know… my mommy and daddy are going someplace for dinner and I thought they'd takes me but they left me heres."

"So? This is better than some udder place!" Lil declared.

Tommy frowned though, still feeling like something was… missing.

"Oh my!" Betty said with a gasp, turning up the news.

"-police confirm famed businessman Mitchell Mucklehoney claimed he didn't actually hire the prostitute or buy the cocaine, it was merely "a prank". His arrest has left people stunned."

On the TV Stu appeared. "I just had dinner with him… I mean he acted strange but still… glad I didn't get the contract with him now!"

~MC~MC~MC~

Author's Notes: So someone asked me if I'd be willing to do a little commentary with these chapters, basically explain my thought process. So we'll start with the previous two and then this one.

Tommy's First Birthday just cements how the adults overthink and underthink things. I mean… a puppet show for babies? Okay, maybe if you took them to an event where there were bigger kids but babies aren't really going to care about an elaborate puppet show. This was just overdoing it. And then STU PICKLES INVENTED ANTI GRAV! And thought it was just a toy for babies! I mean, I know this show had a TIME MACHINE as a toy but dear lord!

For Barbeque story I find it so very odd that the babies aren't watched enough for no one to notice Angelica and Tommy fighting (Because she was being rather loud) BUT have no problem hearing Tommy cry. Okay, selective hearing maybe but Howard was RIGHT THERE. And Didi JUST SAW Tommy try to eat a bug… you're telling me she wouldn't be worried about Tommy eating more bugs and be keeping an eye on him? Think it was some psycho-whatizit?

As for this chapter… I understand that it's the second episode and the families haven't been developed but come on. Give Tommy to Chas or Betty. Except… this created a problem that Tommy is the reason Stu got the contract. So the ending where its revealed the businessman likes whores and drugs. Though better than my original thought that the cops raiding his house and learned he was a cannibal.

Of course, in this world with Drew being a much better dad Stu could have called him too but Betty lives closer