What If They Were Competent?

by Mr. Chaos

The Stipulation: One chapter a day. 500 words or less. Every episode of Rugrats. The Challenge: What if the adults on Rugrats were actually good parents? Watched their kids? Thought ahead? DIDN'T think it was fine for babies to nearly die every 5 days? Tommy is about to have a very different life with Stu and Didi actually using their brains.

146. Potty Training Spike

Potty Training Spike

"Oh, I need to go potty really bad!" Chuckie said, wiggling in the grass.

"Then let my mommy know you need to go," Tommy said, pointing over to where Didi was chatting with Chas.

"But if I do that then they'll watch me!" Chuckie whined.

"So?" Tommy asked, confused. "My mommy and daddy have seen me use my diapee lots of times! Sometimes I even waits so that they can get me a fresh one right away!"

"Its just not the same, Tommy," Chuckie whimpered.

Lil thought that over. "Then you could go potty out here… like Spike!" She pointed over at the dog as he did his business on a tree.

"But then you guys will be watching me go too!"

"What if we all go?" Phil asked. "I could use a potty break."

"Me too!" Tommy declared.

"Well… I guess that's okay." Chuckie smiled. "Thanks guys." The babies toddled over to the tree that Spike had been using and Chuckie pulled down his pants while Phil and Lil removed their diapees. Tommy began to struggle again with the snap on onsie he always wore, trying to find some way to get nakey so he could help Chuckie. But no matter what he did he couldn't get out and then he heard his mommy calling.

"No no no!" she said, hurrying over. "We don't go potty on the tree! Only doggies can do that." She scooped up Phil and Lil while Chas grabbed Chuckie, leaving Tommy to continue to wiggle and try to escape. "Tommy, what's wrong?"

Trying to get his mommy to understand he pulled on his onsie and then pointed at Spike.

"Oh sweetie, only doggies can go potty outside on a tree. People use the potty. Just like you will eventually. Now come on, let's get you three cleaned up." Didi and Chas carried the babies inside, Tommy following behind… but his thoughts were elsewhere.

He… would have to use the potty?

He looked down at his onsie and the diapee it hid.

…no. Tommy refused to accept that. He was going to stay a baby forever because it was the bestest of best things ever!

~MC~MC~MC~

"What are you going to do?" Melinda asked.

"Nothing," the creator stated.

No one believed him.

"By the way, nice year long absence," Trixie commented.

"Hey, not like anyone down there noticed! They crammed 4 Christmases into a single year!"

Author's Notes: Found I had a bunch of these still written that I never posted so here we go!