Upon hearing that, Tenshi's face immediately went pale. Somehow, it seemed the smug smile that she had been wearing a moment before had leaped over to a new home on Renko's face.

"You told us you found life in the heavenly realms boring and wanted to fight the Hakurei shrine maiden, so you caused an Incident," Renko continued, "that makes sense, in a twisted, self-centered way, I suppose. It leaves one big problem though. That's just a single-use time killer, the sort of scheme that someone who is busy and doesn't have time to work out the details might come up with. Just smash the shrine and enjoy the extermination match when she comes to get revenge. One and done, right? For someone like you though, with too much time already, that would only be a momentary distraction. You would want something you could use again and again. A more continuous source of enjoyment."

Remilia's face popped into my mind as Renko said that. She had also caused an Incident, at least partially out of boredom, blocking out the sun so that she could explore Gensokyo at her leisure. If that plan had succeeded, then it would have provided her the opportunity to go out whenever she wanted. Doing something that would only amuse her once wouldn't have been worth the effort for her. Her plans had been foiled, however, and what had she done afterwards? When I asked that question of myself, I suddenly understood what Renko was thinking.

"In short, Tenshi, you wanted to find a way to have fun for a long time going forward, and what could be be a better for you than an excuse to go down and visit the world below yourself? Fighting the miko was one thing, but since you went to all the trouble of causing an Incident rather than just popping down and issuing a challenge to Reimu directly, I'm betting that denizens of the heavens like you aren't supposed to go down to the world of mortals. If they could, then you wouldn't have to bother with this, and you wouldn't be bored enough to want to. If you did something terrible though, made some sort of mess that you were obliged to clean up down on the surface, well, then you'd have the perfect excuse. You'd have to go down to the surface, rules be damned, right?"

Renko's unceasing smile was met with only stony silence.

"Of course there was more too it than that. You had to destroy the shrine to ensure that you would be the one who would get to rebuild it. Because of a little something you were planning to put in the shrine during it's reconstruction. Just now you said you could probably shake at Gensokyo if you struck at the right place. I'm betting that 'right place' just so happens to be beneath the Hakurei shrine. If you were in charge of rebuilding the shrine then you would get to do all the steps necessary to consecrate the land first too. And how do you concentrate the land for a new shrine? By laying down a Keystone. Keystones are something usually put down when building a shrine or other large building in hopes of suppressing earthquakes, but if you put one down underneath the Hakurei shrine, you could strike it whenever you wanted. Your very own instant Incident-on-demand button for the next time you get bored. Even if you didn't intend to use it to destroy the Hakurei shrine again, you could use it as an excuse to go visit at your leisure. To maintain the Keystone, or replace it or maybe have it shake just a little. As long as it was there, you had a reason to descend from the heavens, just as often as you felt like."

Just like Remilia, Tenshi could pass the time after the conclusion of the Incident by going to bother Reimu. Bored of boredom, powerful youkai seemed naturally drawn to her. Tenshi had even formulated this scheme without ever having met Reimu. Was there something about the Hakurei miko that called specifically to the attentions of spoiled girls with too much power and plenty of time on their hands?

"So," Renko said, smoothing out the brim of her hat. "How'd I do?"

Tenshi, who had been watching Renko with a furious expression and tightly sealed lips had changed her complexion again, going from pale to a livid scarlet as she puffed out her cheeks. She said nothing for a moment, then hurled her sword to the ground in frustration. It clattered and spun for just a moment before vanishing entirely.

"Who are you?" she shouted. "You look like a human but you have the temperament of the shrine maiden and you can read my mind! Are you a satori?"

"Can I take that as confirmation that my theory was correct?" Renko asked, still grinning.

"You can take that as confirmation that you need to shut your mouth! If you tell anyone about this, I'll shut it for you." There was a faint snapping sound as she extended her arm towards Renko and instantly the sword appeared back in her hand, taking a form just long enough to be hair's breadth from Renko's nose.

Renko raised both of her hands, palms up. "Easy there, I have no intention of telling anyone, so long as I'm allowed to claim my prize and stay here with my friends. I won't mention a word of it to Reimu."

Tenshi glared at her, seemingly unconvinced.

"Honestly, none of us would even mind if you came down to visit the shrine. I'm sure it would be fine. We don't want another earthquake though. If you could implant that Keystone like you planned but actually use your power to suppress earthquakes rather than cause them, I'm sure you'd be a welcome guest. And, if you rebuild the Hakurei shrine, Reimu won't mind you being there either. Nobody loses anything that way and you get what you want. Heck, you could even come visit Merry and I at our office in the village while you're down on Earth from time to time."

"Seriously, Renko? You're inviting her over? Do you think that's a good idea?" Sanae asked, incredulously.

"Well if it prevents an earthquake, why not? We'll be the saviors of the village. Keine will probably thank us for inviting a celestial over. Someone from the heavenly realms must be a good influence, right?"

I wasn't thrilled about the prospect of entertaining a celestial in the storeroom of a schoolhouse either, but I was at least used to Renko making ridiculous suggestions like this, so I merely sighed. Tenshi, for her part, looked deflated as the anger drained from her face and she lowered her scarlet sword.

"You're a very unusual human," she said.

Renko nodded. "Why, thank you. It's not everyday I get a compliment from a celestial."

"Was that a compliment?"

Before either of them could continue their conversation any further, any words they might have had were drowned out by a low, thunderous belch that resounded forcefully enough to shake the surrounding trees. All eyes turned to pint-sized oni sitting in our midst, who was climbing to her feet.

"'Shcuse me." she said, with a broad smile. "But we should probably get goin'. It's not good for mortals to hang around too long in the heavenly realm. You don't want to stay here a week and age 100 years when you go back. I need to get back an' make some earthquake preparations anyway." She turned to leave, but then turned back and gestured at me, calling me over while everyone else was talking. I glanced over at Renko before walking over to Suika and lowering my head so she could whisper in my ear. I only wish she could have done something about the eye-watering stench of alcohol that carried on her breath first.

"I don't think that celestial knows what she's doing." Suika whispered to me, no longer slurring in the least. "The amount of power she's built up in that cloud is getting dangerous. If a Keystone doesn't get put down to suppress it real soon, then I think an earthquake might happen even without her trying to cause one. I have a feeling we better go get Reimu up here sooner rather than later. There might be something I could do to try and stop the earthquake too."

I nodded to her. "That's a good idea. I don't trust Tenshi either, but do you think its safe to just leave her alone until Reimu gets here?"

"If a major earthquake does happen, it might not be Reimu you have to worry about anymore. Yukari's lazy, but she won't sleep through something like that. If it's big enough to put the village in danger, you can bet she'd show up. If she does, things will get nasty and it won't just be danmaku any more. You guys should probably all come with me. Hopefully it doesn't come to that, but better to be prepared for a disaster, right?"

I looked at Suika. Her face was still as red as a beet, flushed with alcohol and smiling her lopsided grin. Her eyes had a look I had never seen in them before though. The tiny, drunken, carefree and invincibly strong oni almost looked worried.

-.-.-.-.-

"Ugggh this sucks! After all of that, I still don't get to be the one to solve the Incident?"

We left the heavenly realm behind with Sanae holding each of our hands, just as we had arrived, though with Sanae in much lower spirits. As we made our way through the clouds, watching the distant ground slowly come into focus beneath us she continued to grumble.

"Look on the bright side, Sanae. You not only managed to defeat both Reimu and the mastermind behind an Incident on the same day, but beat Reimu to reaching the mastermind. I'd say you're every bit as skilled an Incident-resolver. The fact that you were unlucky this time doesn't diminish that."

"Yeah, but what am I going to have to do to get to the point that youkai start saying 'I'm going to cause an Incident so I can meet that wind priestess from the Moriya shrine?' The name of the living god Sanae Kochiya should be one that every youkai knows!"

"Sanae, please don't ask for that. Don't you think it would be dangerous?" I pleaded. "Besides, I don't think most youkai know Reimu's name either. Half of them still call her the 'red and white one' or 'that miko.'"

She sighed. "Well I hope Reimu does something soon then. I don't want to have to deal with this rain much longer." Sure enough, as we drew nearer to the Moriya shrine part way up the mountain, it became obvious that the rain clouds Sanae had described to us had not yet dispersed. Dark and heavy, they loomed over the shrine and its surroundings. Beneath them, the rain fell continuously, clattering urgently against the tiles of the roofs as we sped to the ground and ducked under the eaves. In just the few seconds it had taken to descend beneath the clouds and find cover, my shoulders had already been soaked.

"Augh, I should have brought an umbrella!" Sanae said as we landed. She shook her hands vigorously, throwing droplets of water to either side.

"Given the position you were in, I don't think an umbrella would have helped much."

Darting under the eaves, Sanae hurried around to a side door of the residential area of the shrine and fetched us each a towel. While we were drying off and removing our shoes in the entryway, Kanako Yasaka appeared suddenly in the hallway, much as we had seen her do before, manifesting into being in the house where she simply hadn't been a moment before. Sanae seemed completely comfortable with this phenomenon, but it continued to startle me every time it happened.

"Welcome back, Sanae," the goddess said from the hallway. "I see you've brought your friends again. Hello Renko, hello Merry."

"Oh, Lady Kanako! We tracked down and exterminated the mastermind behind all of this bad weather!"

"Oh? The rain seems unabated though." She said, eyeing the towel in Sanae's hands and her still-wet hair.

"Because she refused to listed to me and end the Incident! Even though I beat her! Just because I'm not the Hakurei miko! It's completely unfair!"

"That sounds like quite the adventure. Come on in and tell me all about it. I'll make you all some tea." Kanako gestured toward the living room.

"I'll join you in a minute, I need to get out of these clothes, I'm all sweaty from fighting." Sanae said, padding down the hall toward her room.

We followed Lady Yasaka into the living room and happily accepted the steaming ceramic mugs she brought out. I imagine Renko and I must be members of a very elite minority of people in the world who have enjoyed having tea served to them by a god.

"It sounds like you've had quite a day. I hope Sanae didn't cause you any trouble." Kanako said as she took a seat on a cushion opposite us.

"Quite the opposite!" Renko said with a grin. "We've had a lot of fun today thanks to her. Humans like Merry and I who can't fly would never make it to the heavens with only our feet."

"The heavens? I take it you've been up to the peak of the mountain then. I didn't think humans here knew about that, but I suppose if anyone here would poke their nose into something like that it'd be you. What were you doing there though? Does it have anything to do with the Hakurei shrine being destroyed by an earthquake earlier today?"

"Oh, news travels fast, I wouldn't have figured even a tengu's wings could have brought that story back here so quickly."

"You forget I have a branch shrine there. I saw it all, but neither the mountain nor anything in the village shook, so I suspected the quake might have been artificial. That, combined with all the odd weather lately lead me to conclude the culprit might be in the heavens. Let me guess, it was a celestial with too much free time?"

"Very impressive, Lady Yasaka. Even as a great detective there's nothing I can add to that. We should have come and talked to you first, you're even more of a divine detective than Sanae."

"The market's getting crowded for detectives, Renko," I quipped. "You might have to hang up your hat if we keep meeting so many armchair detectives."

"In this case it would be an Onbashira detective rather than an armchair, but that's beside the point. Lady Yasaka, if you already had deduced all of that, then there's something else I want to ask you."

"Go ahead."

"How long have you known that all of this unseasonable weather was unnatural in origin? It must have been for some time now, correct?"

Kanako smiled pleasantly at us, resting her chin on top of her interlaced fingers. "Of course. No need to hide that. The moment I first saw the scarlet clouds I knew it must be a celestial having a temper tantrum. It happens from time to time."

"But you did nothing to try and stop this unusual rainy season. I take it to mean that while these events aren't your doing, they also meet with your approval, is that right?"

"Well, I don't object. This extended rainy season is a result of Suwako's temperament, but it just so happens that it's also her favorite kind of weather. Because of this constant deluge, she's been in a good mood lately, and finding things that make her happy is more difficult than you might think."

"And does the earthquake also meet with your approval then? As things stand, there's a good chance it might cause serious harm to the village."

"Suwako is a native goddess of the land, and earth and mountains are her domain. We won't be harmed by an earthquake here. If it becomes a disaster in the village, that would be regrettable, but we at the Moriya shrine have enough space and supplies that we could assist with the disaster recovery efforts and temporarily house many people if the need arose. If your house, for example, should collapse just let us know and I'll put out the spare futons."

"Well, thank you for that very generous offer, but I hope not to take you up on it. Would it be possible for Suwako to extend the protection she offers this shrine as a native goddess of the mountain to the village as well?"

"I'm afraid we don't have enough faith there yet to demonstrate her power to that degree, but we wouldn't want the village to be destroyed either. Suwako will do what she can to lessen the damage in the village, and anyone displaced or endangered by what remains will be given aid and shelter. I think that's a reasonable bit of outreach for an institution like ours in the event of a natural disaster. Besides, if the people's faith in the Hakurei miko is not misplaced she may well resolve this Incident before an earthquake even occurs. We'll just have to wait and see."

As she finished saying this, Sanae came around the corner, toweling her hair and dressed casually in a pair of denim jeans and a bright yellow t-shirt. Given the heat and humidity, it was a much more sensible outfit to wear than my partner's trenchcoat. "Lady Kanako," she asked as she put down the towel "what do you think we should do to prepare for an earthquake?"

"There's no need to worry, Sanae. This shrine is earthquake-proof. All the necessary preparations have already been made."

"Really? Even for a big one?"

"Don't you remember the quake we had three years ago? You helped us nail the furniture to the wall after that."

"Oh, right. Is that all there is too it? Well, that was quick then. In that case, we should help Renko and Merry earthquake-proof their detective agency and the temple school too! They're not built like this shrine, and nailing furniture to the walls won't help if the roof collapses."

"Oh, we couldn't ask that of a god," Renko said quickly.

"I think it's a grand idea," Kanako countered. "Consider it a divine blessing upon your house. Faith is all about give and take, after all."

"Well, in that case," Renko said with a grin, "I'll accept it with gratitude." She clapped her hands together and then rose from the table to bow exaggeratedly. I hurriedly did the same.

-.-.-.-.-

And so, when we returned home that night, it was with Kanako and Sanae at our side, to inspect the temple school and our storeroom behind it. After looking about only briefly, Kanako's opinion had been that it would be easier to rebuild from scratch with proper safety measures than to hope to reinforce either structure in a practical way. Sanae had offered to start immediately by bulldozing everything on the lot with a divine wind, but in the end we had declined, telling them that we'd have to run any changes by Keine first.