Chapter 4: The Good Doctor

"Frost, we got an alert from- What did you do?!"

"Why do you assume I did this? …Well, I didn't! He was being an idiot."

"Don't just stand there; help me get him into the MedBay!"

"What's wrong with him?"

"How long do you have?"

"I better get paid extra for this…"

Voices and sounds faded in and out of his mind. Then, like forcing one's head up above bobbing waves, Savitar came back to full consciousness. His eyes peeled open slowly, taking a moment to adjust to the bright lights of… (Where was he?)

"Why is it that I always end up patching you up? You'd think that you might return the favor once in a while – or stop doing stupid things, at the very least."

Startled, Savitar looked to the side to see Frost standing over him with a chart. He scrunched his eyebrows. Pieces of the puzzle then started falling into place. The soft surface under him was a bed, and he was in the MedBay. Savitar would never admit it out loud, but the sight of Frost watching over him as soon as he woke was more comforting than he'd like. Regardless of what may have happened in the time he was unconscious, knowing Caitlin was there chased away all his fears. At least, it used to – back when he had been Barry.

With that thought, Savitar smirked up at her. "Is this sentiment, Dr. Snow?"

She jammed a needle into his arm with more force than necessary, deriving pleasure from his subsequent wince. "Don't be ridiculous. I'm just here for the money."

His smirk remained nonetheless, until questions began filling his mind. "What happened?"

"You passed out."

Savitar raised an eyebrow. It was the closest he ever came to showing fear. He immediately tried to sit up but felt some resistance near his hands. Savitar looked down to discover that his wrists were bound to the bed with meta-dampening cuffs. This time, some fear did manage to show on his face.

He jerked aggressively, trying to break the restraints. "What is this?!"

Frost pushed him back down with a firm (and rather painful) hand on his chest. "Trust me; you wouldn't be able to go anywhere even if you weren't restrained."

"Frost, you better tell me what's going on right now or-"

"Or what? You'll glare me to death?"

Fortunately, Barry and Cisco, who had been alerted by all the commotion, jogged in before things got any worse. Barry was the first to speak. "Woah, guys, settle down. No need for a fight."

"There's always need for a fight," Savitar rebutted, staring pointedly at Frost.

"Ooooh. Brave words coming from the only one in the room restrained and without powers," she threw back.

"Alright, enough!" Cisco interjected. "You're supposed to be keeping him alive, not threating his life."

"I'm a multitasker."

"Well, take a break, Frost. Cisco and I can handle him for a while."

Frost made a show of rolling her eyes and turning away dramatically. "Be my guest. I need a drink."

"You're still on the job, you know!" Cisco called after her. She kept walking, letting out a noncommittal acknowledgement.

Once she was gone, Barry wasted no time with preamble. "Savitar, what were you thinking?"

"You'll have to be more specific."

"You know what I'm talking about. What was the point of that little run you went on?"

"I'm not your dog, Barry. You can't keep me on a leash."

Barry tapped the cuffs pointedly. "Actually, it looks like we can. And even if we couldn't, what did this act of rebellion accomplish?" Savitar scowled and was about to throw out an insult, but his past self interrupted. "I'll tell you what it accomplished. Thanks to that stunt, we know have even less time to figure out how to keep you alive."

This stopped whatever retort Savitar was concocting and sent it back down his throat. He stared suspiciously (or perhaps apprehensively.) "What do you mean?"

Cisco took this as his cue to enter the conversation, as much as he was enjoying watching two versions of Barry argue back and forth. "We ran some tests and it seems the more you use your powers, the faster you die. Hence the dampeners."

"Fix it, then!" Savitar growled.

"Hey, calm down, Incredible Hulk! We're trying."

"Try harder."

"Or we could not try at all."

Barry threw his hands up. "Alright, enough. Savitar, one more word out of you and you'll be recovering in the Pipeline."

"You think that's a threat? I spent an eternity in your Speedforce prison; the Pipeline is nothing compared to that. So, do your worst, because I guarantee I've been bound with heavier chains."

"Or," said Iris, stepping into the MedBay, "We could stop trading insults and do something productive with our time."

The sight of his fiancé, ever level-headed and wise, disarmed Barry. Cisco followed suit, looking something akin to embarrassed. With brief instructions for Savitar to get rest (and keep his mouth shut), they followed the CCPD reporter back into the Cortex. Harry was waiting for them.

"Sounds like you've got yourselves a real fiery patient in there," he said in lieu of a greeting.

"Don't even get me started."

"Well, while you were off dealing with Savitar, I got to thinking: what if there was another event in time that could lead to Savitar's creation?"

"In place of Iris' death?" Barry asked.

"Exactly."

Iris hummed skeptically. "I don't know. If there had been an easier way to survive, I think Savitar would have chosen it. He made it very clear that killing me was the only way."

"We don't know that for sure, Iris. He may look like me, but he's proven to be ruthless. We shouldn't give him too much credit."

"Maybe. But there's still a part of you in him. Since I know you would never hurt me, it's reasonable to think that Savitar would only hurt me if there was no alternative."

"Alternative or no alternative, we don't have the time to track down another event that might replace Iris' death," Cisco said. "Swiss cheese face over there is on borrowed time."

"Well, that's our only plan. What's the alternative? As long as Savitar is alive and we do nothing, the timeline will catch up with him," Harry relented.

"You can't hide from time," Barry agreed with a sigh.

Cisco's head shot up, his eyes twinkling with a new idea. "But what if you could?" His three teammates fixed him with confused looks. Cisco stood from his chair and began to pace. "If there was a way we could trick time into thinking that Savitar wasn't alive – at least not in this world – it wouldn't come after him!"

"And how exactly would we trick time?" Iris asked.

"I might have an idea. Harry, follow me. I need to find Tracy and run this by her."

Frost rummaged through the fridge in STAR Labs' employee lounge. She needed something strong enough to dull her irritation with Savitar, but it was becoming clear that such a substance didn't exist. She settled on Dr. Pepper (perhaps the sugar would do her some good) and turned to leave. As she was walking out, Julian was walking in. He nearly ran into her but managed to back up in time.

"Cait! Sorry, I didn't see you there."

"Clearly."

Frost tried to walk around him, but he took a step back, blocking her path. "Wait! I just wanted to say… sorry."

"You already did."

"Oh, no, I wasn't talking about just now. I-" Julian's words came to a grinding halt as he stared at a spot on Frost's head.

She cocked an eyebrow. "What are you staring at?"

"Your hair, it- a strand of it has started turning brown. Look."

Julian pointed to it, and Frost grabbed the hair to see for herself. It was indeed being to regain a brunette pigment. Something hard and unsteady settled in the pit of her stomach. It was working. The cure was – albeit slowly – working. A part of her never believed it would. This almost felt like a dream. The reality that the life she'd been living for the past several months – the person she'd been for the past several months – was being painted over…. She didn't know how to feel. Should she be happy? After doing the things she did, not many people would've gotten a second chance. She had. Frost had the opportunity to leave all that behind and begin again. Was that the right move, though? Maybe she didn't deserve to start fresh. Maybe she didn't want to. What if she liked aspects of the person she'd become? After all that had happened, it just didn't seem like something she could erase.

Frost shook her head, banishing the self-conscious thoughts. Now wasn't the time. She looked back at Julian. "I guess you should be proud, then. It works."

"Well, it was a team effort. Your mother was a tremendous help."

The mention of her mother made Frost want to leave even more. She tried once again to walk away, but Julian grabbed hold of her arm. The hand quickly retreated when her irises flared an icy blue in warning.

"Caitlin, please. I don't mean to be a bother-"

"Really? I couldn't tell."

"I just have something I really need to say to you. Please, just let me get it off my chest." Frost sighed and crossed her arms. Julian took that as a cue to continue. "I'm sorry if I came off a bit intense earlier. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. I just- I really missed you, Cait. When Killer Frost took over, I was so afraid of something bad happening to you. But, being at H.R.'s funeral today remined me how delicate life is. I don't want to wait until another catastrophe occurs for me to get my courage. So, all that's to say… I'd love to get a cup of coffee sometime."

Frost blinked – and blinked again. Coffee? "I'm sorry; there must be some mistake. You seem to be under the impression that we're friends or something."

"I certainly hope so. But you know I want to be more than that, Caitlin. I've made my feelings clear."

"Yes, and somehow my constant rejection hasn't swayed you. Get this through your head, Julian: you mean nothing to me."

She started to walk away again, but he took a step forward, imploring her to look at him. "Who's saying that – Caitlin or Killer Frost? Because the Caitlin I knew valued our friendship." When she didn't respond, he continued, "Caitlin, I lo-"

"No, Julian! No. You need to stop with that. Do not stand there and tell me that you love Caitlin. She had one rule; she asked only one thing of you – a dying wish, if you will. 'Don't remove the necklace.'"

Julian furrowed his brows, surprised at the turn of the conversation. He hadn't expected her to go back to that. "I- Y-you were dying! I had to do something; I-I couldn't just let it happen. I was trying to help you!"

"Sure, you sound chivalrous, but that's not the truth. The truth is that Caitlin made herself clear: she would've rather died than become me. You couldn't accept that, though, could you? You didn't agree with it, so you decided to ignore it. And yes, you got what you wanted: Caitlin lived. But what about what Caitlin wanted? I ended up taking over and trying to destroy all her friends. I teamed up with Barry's nut-job time remnant. But it's all good because you saved a life, right? Wrong. You sacrificed her desires for your own. You put your feelings above Caitlin's because you were too afraid to lose her. So don't you dare claim that you loved her."

Julian stood there, eyes wide, lips parted, in shock.

Frost took a deep breath, steadying herself. "So. There won't be any getting of coffee or dinner or anything. This – we – aren't happening. Just do yourself a favor and stay out of my way. I won't tell you again."

This time, she was able to walk out, leaving a stunned Julian in her wake.

AN: Yeah, like I said at the outset... not Julian friendly. I just felt that what he did was never properly addressed. So, here we are.