Morning came all too soon for Xena as she awoke and quickly noticed that in a rare instance Gabrielle had actually gotten up before her. She turned to her side as she watched Gabrielle looking out their bedroom window for a few moments. She smiled to herself as she thought about how she always loved the way the morning sunlight played on Gabrielle's long golden hair. As well as seeing it radiating over the features of the woman that Xena loved more than she could've ever imagined that she'd be able to love anyone. But then her smile faded as she remembered what they had gone through the day before. She knew that they needed to talk. Xena didn't want to upset Gabrielle but she needed to try and get her to understand what continuing down this road with having to witness the worst parts of Xena's former self might lead. As brave, heroic, invisible and sometimes even inhuman as Xena might have seemed to those around her, she still had her own insecurities and fears. Though she rarely let them show to the outside world. And in all honesty there were very few who were truly allowed to see the tough exterior walls of "the warrior princess" come down and see just Xena as an actual person. And Gabrielle was one of those select few. Infact she had seen parts of Xena that no one else ever had. Parts that until Gabrielle had gotten through the defenses that had been put up so long ago, Xena herself didn't even know layed dormant in the deepest depths of her own self. So having Gabrielle see her at her very worst admittedly scared Xena. Likely far more than it had actually frightened Gabrielle. But unlike Gabrielle Xena's fear wasn't from being shown the anger, blood or violence. No her fear came from what Gabrielle must think about her now. The fear that had always lurked in a small place at the back of Xena's mind that one day her dark and horrific past would finally become too much for Gabrielle and drive her away forever. Not that Xena would ever blame her. Truthfully Xena had always been surprised that it hadn't already happened. But now, now Xena was certain that this could very well be the the thing that finally does get Gabrielle to leave and likely take the child they share with her. Not that she would blame her but if that was the case Xena was determined to try anything she could that might get Gabrielle to change her mind.
XENA
Hey.
Hearing Xena's voice, Gabrielle looked over to the bed where Xena still layed.
GABRIELLE
Hey. You okay? It's not like you to sleep in so late.
XENA
Yeah. Though I was just about to ask you the same thing. You being okay I mean. It's not really like you to be up so early without having someone wake you.
Gabrielle shrugged as she walked over and sat at the foot of the bed as Xena sat up.
GABRIELLE
Guess I couldn't sleep much.
XENA
I suppose I shouldn't be surprised.
There was an uncomfortable silence between them until Xena finally spoke.
XENA
Look Gabrielle about yesterday. What we saw. I'm sorry. You shouldn't have to see those things. No one should.
Xena looked down but returned her gaze towards Gabrielle when she felt Gabrielle place her hand over hers as it rested in her lap.
GABRIELLE
I'm okay Xena, really. Like I've told you I already know who you used to be but I don't care. I love the person that you are now and that's not going to change just because of some visions of a woman who's long gone now.
XENA
You say that but I still don't think it'll a good idea to go back in there. I don't even wanna think of what else we might be shown if we do.
Gabrielle took her hand away from Xena's as she turned away.
GABRIELLE
(Sad tone) I thought after a night to think about it that you might change your mind about this.
XENA
I'm sorry.
Hearing the hurt in Gabrielle's voice Xena moved from the bed as crouched in front of her and took her hands in hers.
XENA
But look I ment what I said before, if you really wanna get married we can leave today and go do that. I'll make it everything that you've ever wanted. I promise.
Gabrielle looked away.
GABRIELLE
Forget it then.
Xena frowned as she fought back her building irritation. Why couldn't Gabrielle understand that she was only trying to protect her? Not wanting to argue with her again, Xena tried to talk through what she figured was really upsetting Gabrielle so much about not continuing the tests for them to have a joining or bonding ceremony
XENA
Look I know that you probably had your heart set on an actual Amazonian wedding. And I really am sorry. But just because you're queen and we don't have one won't make us any less married. Or you any less of these people's queen. We can even invite anyone of these women that you want to the wedding. I'm willing to bet that they'll be more than excited to come either way. And I'm sure that you could even incorporate some of the Amazonian traditions into the ceremony if you really wanted.
Gabrielle found herself becoming very agitated as she thought about how even after everything they've been through together, Xena still didn't get it. Or more likely she did and was just trying to play dumb in the hopes that it wouldn't get her in trouble.
GABRIELLE
(Irritated tone) You know full well that's not what this is about Xena?
Xena took a breath to calm the anger that began to creep back to the surface.
XENA
OK then would you mind telling me what it really is that has you so mad at me?
GABRIELLE
(Irritated tone) Oh please Xena we both know you're smarter than that. But if you wanna play ignorant here, fine two can play that game.
Gabrielle put on a fake smile.
GABRIELLE
(Sarcasm) Nothings wrong at all Xena. Let's go have that wedding and I can spend the rest of my life hiding behind you just like you want.
Xena was about to say something that she most definitely would've regretted later when they heard Aurora begin crying as she awoke in the other room.
GABRIELLE
I'll get her.
(Sarcasm) That's not too much for me to handle no too is it Xena?
Xena glared at Gabrielle for a moment but said nothing before turning away as Gabrielle left the room to tend to their child. Once Aurora was cared for Gabrielle came back into the bedroom and saw Xena finishing getting dressed. Seeing Gabrielle, Xena picked up the small pile of clothes that she had set on the bed and walked over to Gabrielle who stood in the doorway, shoving the items in Gabrielle's arms as she walked by.
XENA
Hurry up and get dressed. I'll send someone over here to watch the baby and meet you at Cora's house.
Though Xena's voice remained it's normal tone amd her face seemed neutral, Gabrielle could see the anger in Xena's eyes before she walked away. Gabrielle didn't have time to respond before Xena had already stormed down the stairs. She stood there for a moment before hearing the front door open and slam behind Xena as she left the house. Within a few minutes Gabrielle was dressed and down stairs as there was a knock on the front and Skyla peeked her head inside and smiled.
SKYLA
Knock, knock. Xena said that you needed someone to watch Aurora again today?
Gabrielle put on a fake smile and waved for Skyla and Clover to come in.
GABRIELLE
Yeah. Thanks again you two.
SKYLA
Anytime.
After making sure that everything with Aurora was set, Gabrielle left the house and met up with Xena who was waiting outside of Cora's house. Once inside, both Xena and Gabrielle repeated the same ritual that they had done the day before and layed down to enter the spirit realm once again. Though she didn't say anything Cora noticed the tension between them and asked if they were sure that they still wanted to go through with the tests.
GABRIELLE
Yeah we're sure.
(Irritated tone) Right Xena?
Cora saw the unhappy glance from Gabrielle that was sent in Xena's direction who didn't look Gabrielle's way but could feel the intensity behind the look she'd been given nonetheless.
XENA
You heard her Cora. We're doing this. No matter the risk or result apparently.
Again Xena pretend to not notice the angery glance that Gabrielle threw her way as Cora sighed.
CORA
If you insist. Okay just like last time close your eyes and you'll soon find yourselves back in the spirit realm once again. The same rules apply as before. You have no control over what you'll be shown and all you need to do is call out to me at anytime and I'll bring you back.
Moments later as Xena and Gabrielle closed their eyes and felt the same intense feelings of having their contiousness pulled from their bodies and thrown into a psychedelic void they awoke back in the same field where they had arrived the first time. Groaning from the intensity of the trip, Gabrielle sat up and found that once again she was wearing her usual clothes as she shook off the uncomfortable sensation she felt from the journey there.
GABRIELLE
I'm not sure I could ever get used to doing that.
XENA
(Thinking to herself) You're the one who insisted that we come back here.
Xena stood up and simply out of habit offered out her hand to help Gabrielle stand. Gabrielle looked at Xena's out stretched arm for a brief second before intentionally ignoring it as she got to her feet on her own. Xena didn't say anything as she again pushed down how Irritated she was with Gabrielle at the moment and lowered her hand as she along with Gabrielle looked around. The area looked basically the same as when they had been there before. With a vast beautiful meadow surrounding them, except for one notable thing that Gabrielle was quick to notice and point out.
GABRIELLE
Huh wasn't there a waterfall here last time?
And infact Gabrielle was right. There had been a waterfall that she and Xena had gone through before to get to the space where they had seen pieces of Xena's past.
But as they stood in the meadow this time there was no waterfall to be found. Xena scanned the area for a moment and then spotted what looked to be a large lake in the center of the field.
XENA
Maybe that's what we're looking for.
After Xena pointed the body of water out to Gabrielle, the two made their way over to the lake. They both stood at the edge looking at it. Viewing their reflections as they stood side by side. Cautiously Gabrielle crouched down and touched her finger to the waters surface and watched as it rippled for a moment. Then out of nowhere both she and Xena heard voices. They looked around but saw nothing before recognizing that it was their own voices as they listened to a bit of a conversation that they had long ago and forgotten about.
PAST XENA'S VOICE
It's like this Gabrielle, you see this lake and how calm it is? That was me once. And then...
Xena and Gabrielle looked down at the water and saw a reflection of themselves. But it wasn't of them in the present, instead what they saw was a vision of their past as they sat together next to a lake. The two watched the scene in silence as it played out before them across the waters surface. They saw as the past Xena picked up a small stone and tossed it into the water within the vision.
PAST XENA
You see how the water ripples and churns, that's what I became.
The past Gabrielle looked at her Xena.
PAST GABRIELLE
But if we sit here long enough the water will go back to being still again. It will go back to being calm.
PAST XENA
Yes but the stone's still under there. It's now part of the lake. It might look as it did before, but it's forever changed.
The final word from the vision echoed slightly as the image faded away and Gabrielle and Xena looked at one another. Though that particular vision hadn't been bad Xena still didn't the idea of them being back there.
XENA
(Thinking to herself) If yesterday was any indication of how this is gonna go, I'm not sure if we're gonna be able to get through this.
Xena was about to ask Gabrielle if she was absolutely sure that she wanted to continue given what they had seen the previous day, but Gabrielle knew the question was coming and looked at Xena sternly.
GABRIELLE
(Stern tone) Now what? Was that not nice enough for me to watch either?
Xena growled to herself.
XENA
(Angry tone) You know what Gabrielle I don't know what you're problem has been lately but I'm getting really tired of your attitude and your assuming that you know what I'm thinking when you actually have no idea.
GABRIELLE
(Irritated tone) Okay then you won't care if I put my hand in this lake then will you?
Xena motioned to the water before folding her arms across her chest.
XENA
By all means.
With that Gabrielle put her hand into the water and nothing happened. She looked at Xena with a smirk as Xena raised her eyebrow. After a moment Gabrielle attempted
to retrieve her arm and suddenly found that she couldn't pull it out.
GABRIELLE
(Thinking to herself) What the?
Not showing her confusion and slight concern, Gabrielle looked back at Xena and smiled as she kept secretly trying to pull her arm from the water with no success.
GABRIELLE
(Lying) Nope, nothing else of note here.
Gabrielle continued trying to free herself from the unseen force keeping her arm beneath the lake. Xena's keen eyes noticed that Gabrielle appeared to be struggling but thought that Gabrielle might be testing her, so she decided to be more indirect in seeing if Gabrielle needed help or not.
XENA
Are you just going to play around in that lake or are we gonna move on?
GABRIELLE
(Sarcasm) Funny Xena.
Gabrielle continued trying to pull her arm from the water.
GABRIELLE
(Thinking to herself) Damn I don't know how but I actually am stuck here. Okay Gabrielle think you can get yourself out of this with no problem. Just... pull... your... arm... and...
Suddenly Gabrielle yelled as she felt herself get pulled into the lake and dragged under the water.
XENA
Gabrielle!
TO BE CONTINUED...