A/N: Thanks for the reviews.
Baratta jennifer - There are still a few bad things to happen.
"You okay?" Alex asked her sister the next morning as they sat in the DEO briefing room. Not getting a response Alex called louder. "Kara."
"Sorry what?" Kara asked looking up.
"You okay?"
"Yeah."
"Want to try again?" Alex pressed.
"I'm just worried about Alex. She's having nightmares."
"That's not surprising." Her sister said.
"I know. I just wish I could help her."
"You can and you will, but it will take time." Alex said.
"I guess. How's Kara dealing with the whole being under the influence of a psychic transmitter?"
"Barely mentioned it. But then again I've not seen much of her. That said we're meeting for lunch today. Want to join us?"
"No, you two need to catch up." Kara said. "Besides I am going to CatCo."
"You ready for that?"
"Can't put it off forever."
-00-
"Hey Alex." Steve said as he opened the front door and saw the teen before adding. "Martin isn't here."
"I know, he's with MJ and Mel." The younger Alex said.
"Your mom isn't here either." He added.
"I know. I wanted to talk to you."
"Sure, come in." He said leading her to the lounge.
"Sorry for ruining your evening last night." Alex said as she sat down.
"You didn't." He said.
"I ruined your plans."
"We didn't have any. We were just talking." Steve said.
"I'm also sorry that Martin got hurt."
"Alex that isn't on you. Martin doesn't blame you, neither do I. Besides from what I heard you saved him." He said before noticing Alex was staring into the distance. "Alex?" He asked.
"Sorry? What?"
"You okay?"
"Um, yes, still a little tired I guess."
"Sure you shouldn't be under the lamp things?"
"No, Alex said I was okay. Just need to keep eating and sleeping."
"Food I can help with. I have food. I'll be right back." He said getting up.
-00-
"You're alive. I was starting to have my doubts." Cat said as Kara joined her on the balcony.
"Sorry. I was-"
"You don't have to explain yourself. You have done more than enough." Cat said. "How are you?"
"Honestly, I don't know."
"Better than being in denial." Cat said. "So what is bothering you the most?"
"I have spent the last few days wondering if I made the right choice."
"To stop Indomitable?"
"Kind of. When I flew him away from the city I was convinced it was a one way flight. The whole seeing your life flash in front of you didn't happen. But all my regrets did. Including the fact I was abandoning Alex. What I did, I didn't even think about the effect on Alex."
"Perhaps you did. If you didn't stop Indomitable, chances are he would have attacked, maybe killed Alex. What you did, you did for her as much as everyone else. You have a track record of making hard decisions. Even if you had died you knew Alex would have a home and a family."
"Maybe." Kara said looking over the city.
"She would have been safe." Cat said. "But thanks to you were are all safe." Instead of responding Kara just stared at the city below.
"So what's the plan now?" Cat asked knowing it was time to move the conversation on.
"I have no idea."
"Kara, you just said you saw all your regrets. Surely that is a springboard." Cat said. "And don't even start with the not wanting to be selfish excuse. You have earned your right to be selfish." She added as Kara's phone buzzed.
Seeing the message Kara frowned and said. "Sorry, I have to go."
00
"How are you doing with everything?" The older Alex asked her daughter as they waited for their order.
"Me? Fine. Why? I mean I wasn't kidnapped and beaten in the desert, nor was I kidnapped and attacked by Indomitable."
"True, but you were living next to a psychic transmitter."
"At least I wasn't nuts."
"No one thought you were." Alex said.
"Pretty sure Diz suspected." Kara shrugged. "And I should have noticed. I mean it's not the first time my head has been screwed with."
"We all missed it." Alex said. "Actually that's not true, I knew something was wrong and I ignored it. I'm sorry."
"This isn't your fault."
"Kinda is." Alex said. "But what matters now is making sure you are okay."
"I'm okay."
"Really, because it looks like you are spending your time looking after Diz and Alex. Which I am proud of you for, but who is looking after you?"
"Grandma, Diz, you." The younger Kara listed. "I'm okay. I'm angry at not seeing it, but now I know why I felt like crap, I actually feel better."
"Okay." Her mother said before asking. "How's Diz?"
"Better than he was. He went through a lot."
"He talking to you about it?"
"Yes."
"Good."
00
"Hey, come in." Steve whispered to Kara, who stood on his doorstep.
"Why are we whispering?" Kara asked.
"You'll see." He said leading her to the lounge where Alex was asleep on the couch.
"What happened?" Kara asked frowning.
"She came over, started apologising-."
"For what?"
"Last night and then what happened with her and Martin. I told her it wasn't her fault, but then she spaced out and said she was tired. I went to get her some food and she fell to sleep."
"She hasn't been sleeping much." Kara said looking at her daughter.
"I know it isn't my field, but she is showing signs of PTSD. Which isn't surprising seeing she was stabbed bu-"
"Stabbed?" Kara asked eyes wide.
"Well speared maybe." Steve said before guessing. "You didn't know?"
"What happened?" Kara asked.
"Well, according to Martin, Indomitable separated them from Alex and gave her a choice to save herself or them. He then fired those weird spike things from his hands at all of them. Alex put up a forcefield and save MJ, Martin, Mel and Matt, but couldn't stop herself getting hit."
"I had no idea." Kara said looking pale.
"Why don't I go buy some food?" Steve suggested, seeing Alex was starting to stir. "I'll let you two talk things through."
"Thanks." Kara said distractedly. "Could you take your time?"
"Of course."
"And could you come back with Martin?" Kara asked.
"I can do that." Steve said. "Let me know when you want us back." He added leaving as Kara approached her daughter.
"Mom?" Alex asked opening her eyes.
"Hey, how are you feeling?" Kara asked.
"Okay. Where am I? Wait, did I fall to sleep here?"
"You did, which probably means you need more pizza."
"Pretty sure it doesn't." The teen said. "Where's Steve?"
"Gone to get the pizza."
"I'll go home."
"To avoid pizza?"
"No. To give you and Steve some space."
"No way." Kara said. "You are stuck with me tonight."
"You don't have to."
"I want to. Besides Martin will be back soon, we thought we'd do a games night." Kara said, her tone making it clear there was no choice in it. "But first we need to talk."
"About what?"
"What happened to you. Why didn't you tell me?"
"You said Uzheiu had."
"Well there was a miscommunication." Kara said. "I got the everything after the Indomitable left part."
"Oh." The teen said.
"So what happened?"
"Indomitable gave me a choice, save myself or save the others. I chose the others and I got one of his blades in my stomach." Alex listed almost mechanically before Kara pulled her in for a hug. A hug that Alex resisted. "This isn't like when I was a kid. A hug isn't going to fix things."
"I know." Kara said. "But they can still help." She added tightly holding her daughter.
"I'm sorry." The teen said after several minutes.
"For what?" Kara asked.
"I don't regret what I did. But if it happened again, knowing how much it hurt, how scared I was, I don't know if I could do it. I'm sorry for letting you down."
"How have you let me down?" Kara asked confused.
"I'm scared."
"When I first came out as Supergirl within a few days I was getting my ass handed to me. In that fight I got hurt, nothing like what happened to you, but it still hurt. I was so scared. The only thing that kept me going was your aunt telling me she believed in me."
"But you did keep going, and you still keep going, even after what Lobo did. But I'm too scared to do anything. I just keep thinking about being there and the pain and the fear."
"Alex, both times Lobo stabbed me I was scared and it hurt so much, but I kept that from you as I didn't want you to stress about it. Maybe I shouldn't have done. But the truth is I was so scared. And I know when you are scared you feel like a coward, like you aren't worthy of anything. But being scared doesn't mean you aren't brave."
"But doing nothing does. You keep going. I can't."
"It takes time."
"What if I can't ever get over it? What if I can't become a hero? Wouldn't you be disappointed?"
"You don't have to follow my path." Kara said.
"But you want me to?"
"I want you to be happy." Kara said. "Only you can decide what makes you happy." She said as Alex's phone buzzed.
Looking at it Alex said. "It's Martin, he wants to know if I need a rescue."
"From what?" Kara asked.
"This conversation, I guess."
"Do you?" Kara questioned.
"No, but I should go home."
"Not happening." Kara said.
"Bu-"
"Alex, you are in pain and need to recover. That is easier when you are surrounded by friends and family." Kara said. "Plus you need to eat. We'll have pizza together and if you still want to go afterwards, we will."