There was a good chance Carla Bennet knew someone was after her, and that was why she was living off the grid. Nikita was going to have to draw her out, prove to her that she was safe; she was beyond determined to save her from Percy's wrath. Unfortunately, Nikita had to turn to Madeline for assistance. Her adopted mother agreed to help almost instantly. Not only did she want to protect her children's' former teacher, she'd also do anything her daughter asked. She deserved that much. The two managed to work together to formulate some sort of plan. Madeline would call a press conference to discuss what occurred at the Gates House. In front of the cameras, she'd quote Carla's famous wildflowers speech and confess she wanted to talk to that 'constituent' again. Hopefully, that would let her know it was safe to come out of hiding.

However, to ensure they could immediately rush off to protect Ms. Bennet from Percy, Michael and Nikita had to wait with Madeline for her phone call. Awkward silence filled the office the instant the two rogues snuck in. What was there to talk about while they screened numerous deadends. At some point, Michael was able to make smalltalk with Madeline. He thanked her for the help, and for the pardons. Nikita, on the other hand, continued to sit in silence; she had nothing to say. Her partner wouldn't let that last for long. Mother and daughter needed to talk, even if he had to force them to. So, he left to go get them all something to eat. He ignored the glare his partner gave him, knowing what he was doing was worth it. After he was gone, Madeline couldn't help but chuckle, "He's cute."

"Don't," Nikita instantly cut off any attempts to connect. She didn't need to be talking about boys with her adopted mother. She was only there to save Ms. Bennet; she wasn't going to let another loved one be consumed by that damn war with Division. Neither Madeline nor Michael seemed to be able to understand that. Yes, they wanted to save an innocent. But they also wanted to mend the broken relationship. Nikita didn't care about that, however. She was content with how things were. She didn't need her mother.

The senator stared at her daughter across the office. Nikita had intentionally sat as far away from her as possible. She was tucked into the corner of the couch, dark hair hiding her features from any prying eyes. Madeline wanted to know what she was thinking; she wanted to know of some way she could fix things. She had messed up terribly. Trying to ensure her daughter's safety only caused more pain than she ever could've imagined. But they were back together again- sort of. She could have a second chance to make it alright. Moving towards Nikita, Madeline tried one more time to reach out, "Nikki…"

"You don't get to call me that," Seething, Nikita finally directed her harsh gaze at her adopted mother. She had hated when Birkhoff started to call her by her family nickname back in Division. It was a cruel reminder of everything that was stolen from her. Yet as she and the nerd grew closer, he earned the right. He was essentially her family by that point anyway. Madeline, however, lost any claim to 'Nikki'. She didn't get to be affectionate or loving. She gave up that privilege.

Instead of sitting next to her, Madeline decided to rest in the chair across the couch. She could work her way back into Nikita's heart. She was up to the challenge of earning her place in her life. After everything she had done, it was only fair. But her daughter had to understand the whole situation first. It wasn't as simple as giving her away. There were disastrous consequences to every choice she could've made. She did the best she could, "I know you're upset and hurt. But you have to understand…"

"That you didn't want me. That you only adopted me to cover a scandal. And the second you could get rid of me, you did," Wow, Nikita really sounded like Alex. But it wasn't as though she had any solutions to the young woman's family problems. All she could do was let her know she wasn't alone, and that she was always there for her. She still had absolutely no idea how to move past the hurt of being betrayed by her mother. The best she could do was ignore it and focus on the present. It was a terrible plan.

"Fine. You were adopted to keep your father's infidelity underwraps. But the fact that your mother died, and I held you to calm you is true. I loved you the instant I held you. I still love you," Madeline confessed. There was more to the infidelity and adoption story, but it wasn't the time to delve into it. All Nikita had to know was how loved she was. Except, the words only made her roll her brown eyes. The declaration seemed empty to her. How could it be true if past actions proved otherwise. What kind of love was that.

"Then why give me to Percy?" Despite her cynicism of her adopted mother's confession, Nikita had to bite back tears. She hated the small part of her that believed in Madeline's love- the part of her that still had hope for a happily ever after with her entire family. It was all too complicated and messy to think straight. One second her adopted mother's heart was easy to read; all she wanted was the best for her daughter. Other moments, however, it was as though she was deciphering a code. It shouldn't have been that way. Family was supposed to be clear and understandable. Nikita shouldn't feel so torn up inside.

"It was the only way to save you," Madeline softened her voice and her gaze. She wanted to move across the office to comfort her daughter. But she knew she needed more time. Nikita pulled herself tighter against the couch cushions, tears simmering in her eyes. She clenched her jaw to ensure they didn't fall. She wasn't going to break down in front of her adopted mother. She wasn't going to let her see how affected she was by all of that. Taking in a deep breath, she had to bury her emotions. She was stoic and hollow.

"It destroyed me. They made me kill. They made me steal. They made me lie and frame people. They made me sleep with dangerous men. I didn't want to do any of those things. I didn't want to kill anyone, or be whored out. I don't want to be a monster," The tears betrayed Nikita, regardless. Being served up to Division didn't save anyone. That hellhole destroyed every piece of a person's soul, and attempted to shape them into an awful new image. By escaping, the team managed to rebuild themselves into better versions- they were reclaiming their hearts. However, Nikita couldn't shake everything she had done. That was going to be a part of her forever.

Madeline couldn't stand by any longer. She had to comfort her daughter. It wasn't right that Nikita had to suffer so much, and she had no power to stop it. The senator used to have been able to do anything with Oversight. That group gave her power. However, she couldn't protect her children. She thought she could keep all four of them away from pain and heartache; she thought she could have it all. But it appeared that she had lost more than she could afford. Collapsing next to Nikita, Madeline attempted to wrap her in a hug. She was going to be for her then. Even if nothing was fixed, "You're not a monster, Sweetheart."

Instinctively, Nikita fought against the embrace. She scrambled off the couch and away from Madeline. She couldn't take anymore of that. She couldn't have the sweet and endearing mother after she was given up. Their relationship should've been over. She should be more focused on reconnecting with her brother and trying to get home to her sisters. Her siblings annoyed her, and she was so close to killing Sean sometimes during their crusade, but she loved them more than anything. Her adopted mother didn't deserve the same sentiment. The hurt she had put her through shattered her heart beyond repair. There were other options besides forcing her daughter to be an assassin, "You should've let me die."

"Should you have let Alex die? Or Michael? Or Birkhoff? You saved them, but they still experienced pain. Is it still worth it?" Getting to her feet, Madeline wondered. She didn't follow Nikita, yet she did have her look at her. Her daughter's survival was more important than any potential pain. She might've lost her to Percy and Division, but she didn't lose her forever. She had had hope that she would've been happy somewhere. That despite everything she could be at peace. Maybe she could still be after that war. Nikita was fighting hard enough to achieve the life Madeline always wanted for her. The tragic thing was, her adopted mother didn't help her in that quest. She had hindered her.

"Their pain wasn't my fault. I didn't give them to monsters. I saved them and loved them," Nikita never intentionally gave her friends to vile bastards. She did everything she could to save them and protect them. How could anyone not fight so hard for the people they love. Bad things were bound to happen- no one could stop that. Yet Nikita still tried to make sure her friends and family were happy. She'd fight tooth and nail for them; she'd never leave them to the wolves. What kind of symbol of love was that.

Neither of them were seeing each other's side. Their ideas of love differed drastically. Nikita saw it as something to constantly work and fight for. She'd do anything for those she loved. She was selfless and caring, and had a bigger heart than she knew what to do with. Madeline saw love as sacrifice. There was a give and take, and not everyone would be satisfied. Mistakes happened, as they always did. But they were alive, and able to love more. Madeline reached for her daughter in one last attempt to make her understand. She had Nikita recruited because she loved her, "I tried. I fought…"

"You should've fought harder!" Nikita didn't care if her shout carried out of the room. The secretary screening the calls could listen in on the family drama. The world should know what kind of person Senator Madeline Pierce was. She was corrupt, she was stubborn, she did too good of a job at sweeping secrets under the rug. If the world knew of the things she'd done, she'd lose all her power. Although Nikita wanted that, she also just wanted her adopted mother to understand. How could the security of Oversight and Division be more important than her. Why did her witnessing an assassination have to have such drastic consequences, "I was your daughter. I should've been worth it."

Her thoughts turned towards Michael for a second; Nikita couldn't help it. When it came to parenthood, he appeared like a shining example. He was beyond willing to risk everything for Hayley and Max. If he could give his life for theirs, he would do so without a moment of hesitation. He'd do anything for his children. Madeline didn't even compare. For a brief instant, Nikita thought about what her own father would've done had he been aware. Would he have laid down his life for hers. Would he have continued to love her despite everything. She shook those ideas away. She didn't need to cry again. Especially when Madeline was asking her a question, "What can I do?"

"Let me go home. Let me be with my family again. Give me back everything I lost. Including Ryan Fletcher," It was too much to want, Nikita knew that. They were wishful requests that could never be fulfilled. Yet she made them anyway. Maybe she wanted to hurt Madeline like she had hurt her. She wanted her to realize everything she took from her. It wasn't just her home and her life. She lost more than she ever should've. Her adopted mother owed her; the pardons weren't going to cut it. She had to have her family back.

"And Daniel?"

Nikita blinked. The only people to know about her late fiancé had been Division (or Division adjacent, like Alex). She never told Sean about Daniel; that was too much to share with her brother. So how could Madeline know. No one she knew would've told her. Not even Percy would divulge everything that happened in that bunker to Oversight. That group must've had more knowledge than anyone thought. They had the power to know everything, "You knew? You knew what they fucking did to me! Did you know about the hit on Alex? What about Michael? Did you sit by and let innocents die, when you had the power to stop it!"

"Those were Percy's decisions. Oversight tried not to take it that far. Why do you think we wanted him gone? Then he made those asinine black boxes," Madeline was quick to try and assure Nikita. She only knew what happened to her daughter and her fiancé after the fact. If she had known everything beforehand, she would've done something. Or at least attempted to. She never wanted her to be in such pain. She was aware of the assassinations and spying that took place, but not the emotional anguish. Of course she didn't want her daughter to go through that. But Nikita just stared at Madeline, hurt and unforgiving. That was the last straw.

"You're unbelievable," Nikita muttered and shook her head. She turned her back on her adopted mother, not willing to engage in any more conversation. Fortunately, Michael soon returned with the food. Although he sensed the tense mood in the room, he didn't say a word. He passed around the dinner, and moved to be by his partner's side. There was still so much left for them to do. There was Ms. Bennet, Katya, Semak, Ari, Percy, and Amanda to be worried about. The strained mother-daughter relationship was only added to the list. However, that seemed the most troublesome. No victories, or understandings, or forward movement had been made. Nikita and Madeline were at a stalemate, where love and hatred were mixed so tightly it was confusing. It was just never ending. And Nikita was starting to think she couldn't do it all.