Summer was fast approaching, but to Audrey, it already felt like it was in full force. Over the past couple weeks, she'd poured herself into her work on the farm, and it was starting to pay off. She'd made a visit to the local library and left with what felt like every farming almanac under the sun. She wasn't big into reading, but she figured it couldn't hurt to educate herself and attempt to be somewhat decent at the job she took on without any experience. Plus, she thought that learning about all types of flora and fauna would leave no room in her mind for thoughts of Shane. Or sex. Or sex with Shane.
She stood up from the squatting position she assumed to weed around her rows of strawberry bushes, wiping the sweat from her brow. She could only hope the sudden end-of-spring heat wave wouldn't kill off the plants before they even got the chance to bear any fruit. Taking a moment to stretch her sore legs, she scanned the area around her. Audrey really had put all the crap from the books into practice. The debris that once littered the farm from years of neglect was nearly gone. She had managed to rig a quite intricate sprinkler system so she didn't have to hand-water her crops. Even her hens had grown up and started producing eggs. Audrey smiled, more than content at the fruits of her labor.
Not long ago, she was stuck at a desk in the city. Now, she was carrying out her grandfather's legacy, and it filled her up with a feeling of pride. The best part? The whole farming thing really did help to curb her incessant desire for sex. Firstly, she had little to no time to even think about it. She hadn't realized that farming truly was a full-time job. Her days started early and ended late, leaving no time in between for unchaste thoughts. Secondly, all the work made her body quite sore, and the excessively rough type of sex she preferred wouldn't bode well with her achy muscles.
Audrey dusted the loose particles of dirt and soil off her jeans, then leisurely made her way over to the coop. Aw, shit. I'm out of feed.
"I'm so sorry!" Audrey exclaimed audibly to the chickens as if they were listening. "I'll get you some food, I promise."
The task immediately jumped to the top of Audrey's mental to-do list. Eggs were a pretty good source of income for Audrey, and well-fed chickens resulted in higher quality eggs. That, she didn't have to read a book to learn. Shane had told her. She looked down at Princess, feelings of both anger and sadness washing over her in a flurry. What happened to the Shane that teasingly named a chicken after her? The Shane that she'd had a deep talk with on the end of the dock? That image of him died in her mind when he basically told her he never wanted to see her again. Yet in Audrey's twisted reality, it only made her want him more.
Audrey's only serious relationship– not hookup, an actual boyfriend– had been with a drug dealer back in ZuZu. He had untreated anger issues that she often suffered the consequences of. He screamed and he yelled, and he hit. He only punched walls and stuff at first, taking his anger out on inanimate objects. That stage was short-lived, however, quickly spiraling into blows to Audrey's face. She stayed with him for two reasons. One, he fucked her well and good, every night without fail. Even when everything was falling apart, the one constant in their relationship was sex. Audrey would be lying if she said that she never slept with anyone else while she was seeing him, but that didn't mean he wasn't good in bed. It just meant that Audrey was an addict with no self control. Blake did eventually catch her cheating and she still has the scar from the beating she took the night he found out, but that's a story for another time. The other reason she stayed is that she thought she could fix him. She thought her love would be enough. That it would give him peace and they would live happily ever after. A part of her still thinks that if they were still together, he would have gotten better. Perhaps that's why she's been desperately pining over Shane. She wanted someone to fix, to help like she couldn't help herself, and Shane was her target.
Audrey slipped out of the coop and shut the door behind her, still not having a fence up to let the chickens out to graze. She made a note to inquire about that during her visit to the Mitchells Ranch for more hay.
Though her grandpa had left a beat up Subaru to her with the farm, she decided to walk to Marnie's. She had grown rather fond of walking in her time in Pelican Town. How could anyone not, with the lush landscapes and breathtaking views. She hummed a tune to herself as she strode down the dirt path leading south from her farm, and she was at the ranch in no time.
Audrey reached up to knock on the door, but it swung open at her first tap, as it was already ajar. She hesitantly stepped inside, not wanting to invade a family home. Marnie's storefront was situated in the entryway, but it still felt like an intrusion being there, as she could see into the kitchen and living room from her vantage point at the door. "Hello," she called out, trying to garner someone's attention. She was slightly disappointed to see that it was Marnie who called back, and not Shane.
"One second!" a sweet and motherly voice called out. Marnie immediately appeared from down the hall, coming from what Audrey assumed was her bedroom.
"Audrey, how nice to see you. What can I do for you, dear?"
The way Marnie spoke was so comforting. It was caring and maternal, making Audrey miss her own mom back home. I should call my mom soon, she thought before speaking up to reply.
"Just here to pick up some more hay. I think maybe three bales? I'm planning on getting another one of your chicks once the next round hatches so I wanna be prepared."
Marnie smiled wide at that. "I hear you're doing much better on the farm. Your grandpa would be so proud. We used to be good friends, you know. He was like my mentor in a way…" Her smile turned to a look of grief as she trailed off, but she quickly wiped it away. Marnie turned to walk toward the cash register to ring Audrey up when a series of loud coughs rang out in the distance. She gasped and whipped around to the hallway she originally came out of. She said a hurried, "I'm sorry, honey. I'll be right back," and rushed down the corridor.
Audrey stood complacent, tapping her foot on the floor while she waited. When Marnie didn't come back after a couple of minutes, curiosity got the better of her and Audrey followed in Marnie's footsteps down the hall. She reached the end, where she encountered a wide open door with commotion coming from inside. When she peered in the room, she was taken aback at the sight.
Shane lay on the floor in a pool of his own vomit with a concerned Marnie hovering over him. His aunt was desperately shaking his shoulder, but he didn't respond. He was unconscious.
"Audrey, d-do something!" Marnie stuttered in fear.
Audrey's eyes shifted to an untouched glass of ice water sitting on the dresser across the room. She carefully stepped over Shane's body and grabbed it, then gently pushed Marnie away so now she was the one standing over him. In a rapid motion, she tipped the glass completely upside down, soaking Shane with the water. He twitched a little at first, but then quickly shot up and gasped for air. "What the fuck?" he groaned.
He blinked a few times, as if willing his eyes to focus. Before he could croak out another word, Marnie lashed out. "All you ever do is mope around and drink. Don't you ever think about the future? Do you even have a plan?"
Audrey could have sworn a ghost had taken over Marnie's body. She had never seen her so angry, and didn't even think she was capable of yelling. Marnie's soft brown eyes had practically turned red with rage and disgust. Her threatening gaze bore holes into Shane's head, awaiting a response.
"Hopefully I won't be around long enough to need a plan," Shane grumbled. A small shriek arose from the doorway, and the three simultaneously snapped their heads toward the door to see Jas standing there, still in her pajamas, holding a plush bunny. She burst into tears and ran out of the room sobbing.
Marnie opened up her mouth to yell, likely to scold Shane some more, but Audrey raised a hand to stop her.
"Marnie, you go comfort Jas, I'll take care of Shane. It's all gonna be okay, alright?" Audrey had decided to assume control of the situation, seeing that everyone else was either too drunk or too upset to think logically. Marnie nodded her assent and headed off to Jas' room, shaking her head at her nephew one last time. Audrey turned her attention back to Shane, who was trying to get up and walk, but flailing all over in his inebriated state.
"Jas, I have to go to Jas. I need to apologize," he said frantically.
Audrey held a finger to her lips and shushed him like a child. "Not right now," she said gently. "You're too fucked up. You can apologize later, okay? Let me help clean you up."
Audrey knew by now that Shane would have usually protested receiving help of any kind, but he simply shrunk back down to the floor and cried. Audrey slowly sat down to join him and placed an arm gingerly around his shoulder, not even caring that some of his vomit got on her brand new sweater. She stroked his hair while he bawled, hoping he found it comforting. It seemed to have worked at least a little, because Shane's choked out sobs eventually died down.
"I'm gonna get you a glass of water," Audrey finally said, getting up to leave.
"No!" Shane protested. "Stay with me, p-please."
Audrey felt nothing but heartache for him in that moment. He looked so disheveled, so pale, almost corpsely. He was a shell of a human being, rotting in the metaphorical dirt. "Of course," she said, "I'll stay. But let me get you out of those clothes, at least."
Audrey didn't wait for Shane's response, but instead made her way to his dresser and rifled through the drawers in search of a clean outfit. She'd grabbed sweatpants and a t-shirt, and was in search of a pair of boxers, but was surprised when she opened his underwear drawer. Between the clothes lied flasks, several of them, bottles of varying fullness, and an Exacto knife. Audrey's stomach turned at the sight, but she bit her tongue. She couldn't say anything now, Shane was far too fragile.
Without another word, Audrey grabbed Shane by the hands and pulled his still-limp body to a standing position. They wobbled their way to a door directly across the hall. Audrey was relieved to find out that it was, in fact, the bathroom. She sat Shane down on the side of the bathtub and began to dab at his bile-soaked arms with a damp washcloth. She knew he probably wouldn't be able to manage a shower on his own, so that'll have to do for now.
"Shane," Audrey said sheepishly as she washed him up, "how much did you drink?" She felt guilty just asking the question, but she had to know how he wound up in a daze like this. How the ever so defensive Shane drank himself into the state of a small child who needed taking care of. How he was even letting her near him at all.
"12 pack. The whole thing. It was lager, too. I fucking hate lagers." Shane looked like he was about to double over again just thinking about it.
"Why'd you do it?" Audrey immediately regretted the intrusive question, then followed it with, "nevermind, you don't have to answer. You don't owe that to me, I'm sorry."
Shane shook his head. "There's not always a reason, ya know. Sure, I have triggers, but I drink to quiet my mind. It-it kinda feels like there's a swarm of bees in my head and the only way to stop the buzzing is with a bottle, if that makes sense."
"It makes perfect sense," Audrey confirmed. She then plucked his stack of clothes from the countertop and held it out to him. "Come on, take off your shirt."
"Can you look away?" Shane's usual gruff voice sounded small, boyish. Audrey almost smiled at the fact that he was embarrassed to change in front of her. He carried himself with an air of confidence surrounding him, as if he was better than everyone else, but here he was, self-conscious of his body. It was in that moment that Audrey realized the whole mean, tough guy act was merely a facade. That there was a person somewhere hidden behind that mask. The last of the hate she felt toward him at the playground diminished, and she developed a newfound determination to uncover the man inside that hard-shelled exterior. She turned her back and waited for him to dress.
Once Shane was done, Audrey led him back to his bedroom. Though he still had a little trouble, Shane managed to get himself under the covers and into bed. Audrey sat by his feet, just now taking in the room around her. It was like a little glimpse into his life. A series of soccer trophies sat on a shelf, and a slightly deflated soccer ball lay on the ground in the corner. He used to be an athlete? A small TV was hooked up to a console. In front of it, there were several cushions strewn about the floor behind a coffee table littered with multiple game discs. I didn't know Shane played Mortal Kombat. That's my favorite. Audrey chose to see the good parts of his room that highlighted his personality, ignoring the liquor bottles, various cans and other pieces of trash, and dirty clothing that littered the floor. Shane spoke up, interrupting Audrey's self-guided tour of his personal space.
"Thank you for, for everything. You really didn't have to help me."
"It was no trouble at all, Shane. If you ever need anything, just ask, I mean it. Where's your phone?"
Shane motioned over to his nightstand with his head. Audrey picked up the phone and smiled to herself when she saw that his lockscreen was a picture of him and Jas. She navigated her way to his contacts, and filled in her number. "Now you have my cell, but don't go spam calling me, or you're getting blocked."
Shane laughed ever so slightly before his expression grew serious again. "Audrey?" he asked, unsure of himself.
"Yeah?"
"Can you sing to me? My mom used to do it to help me sleep when I would get nightmares as a kid."
Audrey's heart once again grew warm. She was delighted to see Shane opening up to her again, but she had to remind herself that it wouldn't last forever. After all, he was still drunk, still hardly recovered from a blackout. Nonetheless, she felt an overwhelming sense of empathy for him and opened her mouth to sing a classic Bob Marley tune to lull him to sleep.
Rise up this mornin'
Smiled with the risin' sun
Three little birds
Pitch by my doorstep
Singin' sweet songs
Of melodies pure and true
Saying', ("This is my message to you")
Singing' "Don't worry 'bout a thing
'Cause every little thing is gonna be alright."
Singing' "Don't worry (don't worry) 'bout a thing
'Cause every little thing is gonna be alright!"
