More days passed with no sign of the bounty. Their goblin slaying funds were pretty much depleted at this point and everyone was starting to feel the crunch. Aqua had completely devoted herself to their denim development project and Darkness had signed up for a questionable quest that sought to empirically measure the effects of spells against the unarmored body of adventurers.
Meanwhile he and Megumin had resorted to bargain bin kill quests. Without the others available nor the funds to resupply and repair damaged gear, they could really only go after safe bets. Today that meant neroid culling. While pretty harmless, their population could get out of hand and harm the local ecosystem if left unchecked. Normally monsters would gobble them up but given that Axel was a town for adventurers this natural balancing act had been disrupted.
They'd hiked several minutes outside of town and found the cave where the critters had made their nest. A quick peek into the entrance showed at least a couple hundred of the buggers moving around. The quest mentioned that the caverns ran pretty deep, but no one owned them so property damage wouldn't be an issue this time around.
"After you, o greatest mage."
Megumin didn't have it in her to put together a flashy chant over these small potatoes and just wordlessly blasted the entire cave system. An intense wall of heat pushed them back as the thundering blast ripped through stone. Whatever other critters had been calling it home were now entombed there for the next couple centuries.
Kazuma caught the mage mid-fall and quickly passed a bit of MP her way.
"Easy money, ay?"
She spat on the ground bitterly. "Explosions like this are an affront to my talents! You must find me more suitable targets soon or… or the dark god held within me will surely break its seal!"
At this point in their relationship such proclamations didn't even raise any eyebrows.
"Yup, I'm sure you're just barely containing the forces of evil." He ruffled her hair before setting off. "C'mon, let's see if we can bum a meal out of one of our admirers."
She began to chase after him. "Really, Kazuma! It's a battle of attrition that I fear I may soon lose!"
One trip to the Guild later and they were 15,000 eris richer. The neroid genocide was only worth a measly 5,000 but apparently Megumin'd wiped out some giant bats that had been terrorizing the local farmers and got a nice little bonus for it. Having at least a few notable targets mixed into her massacre seemed to wash out the bitter taste the quest had left in her mouth.
Not much wealthier than when the day started, the duo hung around the dining areas and chatted up friends and acquaintances alike in the hopes of scoring some freebies.
A voice rang out amongst the masses,"Oi, my man Kazuma! What's up? Been meaning to ask about that blade I lent ya."
Kazuma's blood ran cold. He'd managed to avoid Dust until now for this exact reason. The man was a good drinking buddy and he'd have his back in a brawl any time, sure, but even he'd beat someone's ass if they lost a million eris item.
The man weaved through the crowd and gave him a fist bump before acknowledging his companion. "Yo, little Miss Jailbait's here too? Heard the blast earlier, good hunting!"
"H-Hey Dust, all healed up from the big battle now?" Kazuma asked, trying to change the subject while physically restraining the mage as she leapt to strangle the warrior.
"Oh, that little spat? Get this - a bunch of crazy strong dark knights teleported in and then that cute Wiz chick casted this sp-GAH! Dude, help get this gremlin o-OW!" The near level 50 arch-wizard, despite her tiny frame, was more than strong enough to escape his grip and throttle the man nearly twice her size.
"I have a name, it is Megumin! If you have any issues with using it then I shall hear them! And I'll have you know I'm a proper woman of marrying age!" The scene was so common by now that only the more novice adventurers even bothered to glance.
Kazuma let her squeeze a little more color out of the man before stepping in to peel her off. With their combined efforts the mage had been pried off without incident.
"Agh, alright little lad- Ehm, I mean, Megumin. Maybe, maybe I went a bit too far," Dust panted out.
"Here, let's let bygones be bygones." The warrior waved a waitress over.
"Hey cutie, get us a round of Crimson Beers and some fried Hawkite strips why don't ya?"
The admittedly pretty waitress wordlessly jotted down the order before walking away. Kazuma and Dust couldn't help but leer a bit.
Man… what was her name again? Sofia? Sumira?
The Guild knew exactly what it was doing by handing out such tasteful uniforms...
Wait, shit!
He didn't have to look to know it. He hung his head in shame and offered a conciliatory hand to the mage. A few moments later he felt her slender fingers join his under the dining table.
To his surprise the mage just leaned into him while their warrior friend was busy ogling the workforce.
"Change takes time, I know. And you're only human. I'm just happy you remembered," She whispered sweetly.
With that, all appeared forgiven, though the shame still lingered. Kazuma took a moment to thank the gods for setting him up with someone so understanding.
Stuffed on another man's dime and not wanting to overstay their welcome, the adventurer excused the pair. With other banter keeping the warrior distracted, the topic of his enchanted blade never re-emerged to haunt him.
The sun had begun to set and a looming winter chill could be felt as they went across the residential district. They'd need some proper winter clothes by the looks of it, and that meant that they'd need more cash. The cycle of poverty continued.
"Kah-zu-maaa… Kaaaaaa-su-mah! Hehe, I fell for an adventurer with a weirdo name like that~" Megumin sang out.
"Keep it down! You want the whole town to hear you, idiot? And who exactly are you calling a weirdo!? If you have a problem with my name then I shall hear it!"
"Ooooh yeah? Let's see those *hic* fists then, eh tough guy?" She stumbled her way into a fighting position and jabbed the end of her staff into his cheek.
I don't have time for this booze hound.
"Bind."
Kazuma grabbed the writhing mage like a sack of rice and slung her over his shoulder. He was promptly rewarded with a fresh coat of vomit all over his cape.
"Agh, dammit Megumin! You talked a big game and now look at you!" He wriggled around, trying to fling off the worst of it.
Thankfully the streets were pretty sparse at this time of day and he could take the drunkard home without too many glares.
After a bribe Aqua had managed to remove the stench of poultry and bile from his clothes. A thorough dressing down by the adventurer and goddess followed, and vows from the mage to never drink again were given. They'd gotten her into pajamas and tucked under the covers without further incident.
Now alone with her, Kazuma went to put out Megumin's candles and see his way out. A gentle tug on his sleeve stopped him in his tracks.
"Kaaazuma…" Megumin slurred out.
"That's my name."
She reeled him in, "Hee-hee, mine too! I shall be known as Kazuma Megumin in due time!"
Doesn't exactly roll off the tongue does it?
He sat next to her and gently pushed her back on the mattress.
"There's no need for that. Crimson Demons don't carry last names, do they?"
She shook her head. "I gave you my whoooole body and soul, my magical strength and undying loooove!~ In turn I will take all that is yours, name and everything!" She jabbed a finger at his chest with that last line.
Kazuma managed to keep a straight face as he stroked her cheek, but under the surface his heart was pumping so fast that he couldn't tell if he was in love or at death's door.
"O-Okay then. Sure, y-you can have it all," He managed to stammer out.
Deep down he knew he liked her, he really did enjoy spending his days with her and it was hard to picture a different life than what he had. If push came to shove he'd say he did love her, but marriage? Taking on his last name? He'd never contemplated such things, and the sudden onslaught of these topics in the past few weeks left his mind spinning. It felt strange that one years younger than him had the emotional maturity to tackle such serious life decisions with full confidence.
He looked down at her with a mix of affection and jealousy. The mage was pretty much out of it. Give it another minute or two and she'd conk out.
"Lie with me, Hero of Belzerg, it's time to fulfill your manly duties…" She spread her arms and gave him the best "come hither" look she could pull off in her state.
Kazuma chuckled and shook his head. "Nah, not tonight. Not like this."
He blew out her candle and scooped Chomusuke off his makeshift bed, placing the fluffy feline into her open arms.
"Veeery well, I accept this offering as well…" She embraced the cat and settled into a comfy position.
Kazuma left the room with much to contemplate.
