Chapter 11

Summary: Some is explained

Devon stared at her for what felt like an eternity, but she remained firm in her resolve to keep a steady gaze and control her breathing. Of course she knew and he knew she knew, but it was both so fantastic and awful to contemplate. Her employer, her friend, and her something, and it had been so exhilarating. Such a shame that it would now come crashing down.

He whispered, "Yes, I can use my legs."

Although she was prepared, it felt like a punch to her gut and she didn't know how to feel. She supposed if she were in some television show she would fear for her life, sitting in the dark in a van with someone who had just admitted to a grand deception. In shows like that, she would be overly trusting and naive, having some hope that he'd be redeemable or something. But she was Shirley Bennett, not some silly primetime star, and certainly not a throwaway character. She was a survivor.

Springing into action, she soon had him in a headlock. The sputtering was intense, but she retained her focus, um hmming as she thought through what she was going to say. It would be righteous.

As Devon struggled, Shirley's voice lowered with her fury, "You will not mess with me. Faking your paralysis. Who do you think I am?"

There was more sputtering along with an, "Accch iiim soooorrrry."

"Not enough! Did you kill that man?"

"Nooooooooooo!"

For some reason, she loosened her grip and let him out, silently praying that she wasn't being a fool. It was pure instinct to release him, but she knew from her sordid past that he was at least weakened. He sat there, his eyes bulging and his hand going to his throat, and she stared him down with the stink eye as he regained his composure, the flushing in his face perhaps slightly distracting to her under other circumstances.

No, this was no time for thoughts of that. She sat up straighter and let the silence envelope them.

Soon enough, he raspily offered, "Bennett, I'm sorry. I've wanted to be honest with you, I really have."

"Then why haven't you?"

His eyes betraying slight panic, Devon explained, "Because things have quickly gotten out of hand. I don't even know what is going on anymore."

"Between us?"

At this, Devon smiled slightly and shifted. For the first time, Shirley observed he moved his right leg over to the side, something he normally would not be capable of doing.

He answered, "Well, yes, that," he cleared his throat and continued, "but then there's the whole lunacy of this case. I thought I knew some things, but now I don't. And frankly, I'm more than slightly terrified." He turned and looked at her with wide eyes and more than the hint of added perspiration not present after the headlocking.

While she definitely intended to follow up on what he had just said, she stared at his right leg again and asked, "How long have you been able to use your legs?"

"Since about a week before your father's funeral."

She took in a deep breath, letting the reality hit her. She didn't want to make any more assumptions, she just wanted to know.

"Devon, why didn't you tell me?" Her voice cracked, and he instinctively reached over to take her hand, but she moved it away. His face fell, but then he cleared his throat.

"I wanted you to stay."

"It's all based on a lie."

He frantically explained, "I didn't even know if I'd still have the use of them, if it were permanent. I know the doctor said there was hope, but when it started to happen, I started to experience some tingling in my legs, at first I didn't even believe it. But then once I realized it was real, I knew if I told you then, you'd for sure leave me." A tear falling from his eye, he added, "I know it was a selfish and stupid thing to do, and I'm so so sorry."

"I see."

The stillness in her was difficult to interpret, for part of her in a strange way understood. But that didn't make the deception right.

He was going on, "And then there was the Audrey mess. I talked to that girl, Bennett, and let me tell you, the man she said hired her to drive Abed, well he didn't match the description of Custodian Bob at all."

Something once again shifting, she furrowed her brow. "Why would he?"

"Because Custodian Bob is the man who provided me with the info to lead you on this supposed murder case!"

It almost felt as if a pit of a hellmouth was opening up beneath her, the absurdity of what she was hearing. "What do you mean by supposed murder?!"

He rambled on, gesticulating to the heavens, "There wasn't supposed to be any real crime! It was just supposed to be a fun little mystery for you to solve with your friends from Greendale. But then …."

A haze fell around them and suddenly there was a different point of view. She could see it as if she were watching a film.

Butcher's Story

It was about a week before the funeral for Shirley's father that Devon had regained the use of his legs, something he had been told by doctors might be possible. He had been experiencing tingling sensations for weeks but hadn't wanted to get his hopes up, so he hadn't said anything. The timing of his revelation made him sigh as he realized if he told Shirley, she'd be happy for him but she'd for sure leave. He could even imagine how the conversation would go, and how alone he'd feel as she walked out the door without looking back.

They had to work on the case of the yellow orchid, so he stalled in telling her. He told himself he'd confess it soon, once he had a chance to tell her how he felt about her. Every time he tried, she'd start talking about her religion and mentioning her trials with Andre, and it ate him up inside. Other times they would be interrupted by a wacky neighbor or a phone call, right as he was opening his mouth.

And then he received news of the stabbing on campus.

When they arrived on the scene, there was police evidence tape and some emergency personnel he didn't recognize from his time on the force. Although he couldn't make it fully down the steps to examine the body at the scene because he wasn't ready to reveal the truth, he accompanied it to the morgue, which turned out not to be the morgue at all, but student health services. It was there that he discovered that Bumbles wasn't really dead or stabbed. Bumbles reanimated and along with Nurse Raquel, they all laughed. The blood was red paint and the knife was a theatre prop glued to his forehead. He realized then the police had never been called, and there had been no crime.

With a roll of the eyes because some stupid students were pulling pranks and obviously wasting his time, he was going to leave when Custodian Bob approached him and told him that Shirley needed to solve the case. He explained that he was working with a friend of Shirley's, that she would love a good mystery to solve after all her heartbreak and that it would lead to a reunion with some of her friends and she would be happy.

Custodian Bob elaborated that the school's Dean didn't know about the scheme and they were planning on the whole thing culminating in a paintball war and they were aware that the Dean absolutely didn't approve of paintball wars. He was emphatically urged not to tell the Dean about any of this.

Devon, having some strange feeling that something seemed very off about this whole thing, had about enough at that point and went to talk to the Dean anyway, figuring the Dean should know what was happening on his own campus. In that meeting, he sensed the Dean was somewhat insipid but seemed well-meaning. He told him there had been an accident with Bumbles on campus and that he fell. And then he explained that he was hired by a mysterious person to investigate and asked the Dean to be patient. The Dean was surprised and then murmured something about noticing a stretcher on campus earlier but was told it was just an accident and everything was fine. Devon said yes that was true but they'd likely be around campus for several more days. The Dean didn't like that one bit and seemed miffed but at least Devon felt that he had done the right thing.

Devon agreed to continue to play along with the fake murder story only because Shirley had told him stories of Greendale, so he knew such a scheme was probably not completely ludicrous in her world. The fact that she'd be staying around a few extra days would only give him more time to tell her about his legs.

It was when he realized that the Dean must have been kidnapped and swapped out for a Dopple-Dean that he had tried to put a stop to things. He had also been annoyed throughout, especially suspecting it was Abed who had orchestrated the whole thing to begin with because he frankly couldn't see anyone else in Shirley's friend group doing it and they all seemed equally baffled. But Abed of course was a little too into it, and that annoyed him not only because he was taking up a lot of Devon's remaining time with Shirley but also because then Abed went and got himself shot. Which of course turned out to be paint, which was just more annoying because Shirley had gotten completely freaked out.

And then there was Audrey's description of the man she had met on her semester abroad in Singapore, the man who hired her. Of the beard, of the large eyes. Didn't match Custodian Bob in the least or anyone else that Devon could think of. Audrey insisted she wasn't hired by Abed, that Abed wasn't in on it at all. She was supposed to accompany him and pass along information as required, to steer things as necessary. And then she started confessing to him with batted eyelashes that she had developed feelings for Abed and Devon had tuned out.

After Audrey had been kidnapped and he thought Abed had been shot, it had gotten to be too much. He was wracked with guilt over the paralysis issue and keeping all the lies and was about to confess everything to Shirley when the blackout occurred.

Return to Shirley

Shirley nodded as Butcher finished telling his tale and she now fully believed him. The images were so clear in her mind she couldn't help it, and although she was still infuriated at his deception, the sudden realization that he had tried to help her reunite with her friends warmed her heart.

Turning to him she took his hand and gave it a squeeze and smiled shyly. He let out a breath he didn't seem to know he had been holding and they both sat in the comfort of the dark, in the comfort of the temporary pause in the hysterics, in the comfort of each other.

"I'm so sorry, Bennett. I wish I could make this up to you."

"Don't you worry, Devon. You will."

He wrinkled his brow, cocked his head, and waited for her to explain, which she did with a full smile of triumph.

"If all is going according to the script that I believe has been written, not by Abed but by his mysterious benefactor, then I know what will happen next. And you will have a large part."

"I don't understand. And aren't you a little freaked out that we still don't know where Audrey or the Dean are? We should probably call the real police at this point."

"No need. I know who is behind this. And now I know how to play."

"Play?"

A cacophony of gunfire suddenly overtook the area around the library and all around the van. Shirley frantically glanced around the vehicle and then reached over and popped open the glove compartment to reveal pieces of what appeared to be a gun. With the studied hand of an artillery expert, she assembled what turned out to be not one paintball gun, but two. She handed one to Devon and then reaching under the seat, felt around and grabbed the ammo duct taped underneath.

"How did you know this stuff was here?!"

"I told you. I now know what we're supposed to do. There weren't many other places to look."

"What?!"

"Let's go, Devon. You're going to need those legs if we're going to win this Paintball War and rescue Audrey and the Dean."

They hopped out of the van to a new adventure.