"Do you have the Ronson report?" Darcy asked me as she walked by my desk on Monday afternoon.

"Yeah, hang on." I had just come back from lunch and hadn't gotten my head back into work. I opened the drawer and withdrew the file, handing it over.

"Thank you." She chirped. She was turning to go when the door slammed open. "What in the world-"

"This shit isn't funny."

Of course, Coco came storming into the office and slammed a piece of paper down on my desk.

"Excuse me?" I sat down in my seat and quirked an eyebrow at her.

"Your little girlfriend leaving this kind of shit on my desk." she shoved the paper at me. I calmly picked it up but didn't look at it, My gaze turned to Darcy who ducked her head and hurried off with the file

"Is everything okay over there?" Mr. Danworth's assistant, Kaitlyn asked from her desk. It wasn't a huge department, so there wasn't really anything we could do to hide what was going on here outside of Coco calming the fuck down.

"Everything is fine," I assured her. "Coco, take a seat."

"No." She snapped. "Daphne left this on my desk, right out in the open where any of my co-workers could have seen it. If she's bitter then fine, but do not fuck with my workplace."

I finally looked at the paper in my hands, my brows furrowing.

'Man Stealing Whore' was scribbled over the paper- the words were jagged and angry. The letters were thick and the ink smudged.

"There's no way-"

"I brought it to you to be nice. But if she ever pulls shit like this again, Theodore I will handle it myself and it will not be pretty." Coco warned.

"I'll take care of it," I promised, dropping the paper on my desk and running my hand over my face. I didn't think there was any way Daphne could do something like this but- she worked in the ministry, so she could have gotten to Coco's desk. And who else would write something like this?

"What's going on?" Mr. Danforth asked, opening his door to look out at the chaos.

"Nothing." Coco and I chorused, Mine was tired, and hers was angry.

"Just fix it." She snarled and headed out. I folded the paper up and slipped it into my pocket so I could deal with Daphne.

—-

I didn't get a chance until the next day. I skipped lunch in favor of going to the Minister's office. Daphne was about to walk out when I walked in.

"Theo?" She seemed surprised.

"Yeah- can we talk?"

"Of course." She smiled, adjusting the bag on her shoulder.

"I'll take you to lunch." I offered. She nodded in agreement. We didn't go to the cafeteria, instead, we headed out to eat There were a few options around the ministry and this wasn't a conversation I wanted to have around a bunch of our co-workers.

I knew which restaurant was Daphne's favorite so we headed there, letting them seat us.

"First of all- Daphne. I wanted to apologize. I've been, less than kind through this whole thing. I was blindsided by everything with Coco and the betrothal and… I wasn't sure how to handle it or your hurt feelings and the way I chose to do so was the worst possible way." I admitted. Every time she came to me upset or mad it would make me more so because I wasn't in control of the situation and I didn't like not being in control. "I should have been more understanding."

"Thank you." Daphne toyed with the menu, running her fingers over the cover. We paused the conversation as the waiter came over to take our drink order.

"And I am sorry about the ring. That was wrong of me." I didn't have an explanation for that one. I hadn't wanted to give her my mother's ring and I only knew one other design in my mind, which was hers.

"It was." she agreed. I did notice she hadn't said anything about accepting either apology.

"I've done a lot of things wrong in relation to the unexpected wedding but- Daphne." I reached out to stop her from playing with the menu, laying my hand over hers. She froze, her eyes shooting up to my face.

'Yes?" Her voice was a whisper.

"Messing with Coco isn't acceptable. None of us are happy about this- and I hate to say it, but she will be my wife." The painfully hopeful look in Daphne's eyes turned to one of confusion.

"Messing with Coco? That's what you brought me here to talk about?" She yanked her hands out from under mine.

"To apologize, and yes, to put an end to whatever this is." I reached into my pocket and pulled out the paper, unfolding it and holding it out to her. She took it, the confusion on her face deepening.

"Man stealing whore?" She asked. "You think I did this?" I quirked an eyebrow. She scoffed and crumbled the paper, throwing it back at me. "I didn't write this, Theodore, maybe I'm not the only woman your wife has stolen from, seems to be a family trait." Daphne pushed her chair back and grabbed her bag.

The urge to defend Coco filled me, but I pushed it down.

"Daphne," I called after her,

"Go to hell." She snapped, walking out of the restaurant.

"That went great." I nodded. The people at the table next to mine chuckled, well at least there was someone who didn't absolutely hate my guts. I think anyway.

—-

The next week and a half zoomed by, it was a never-ending onslaught of wedding prep. I had to get a tuxedo even though I insisted the suit I wore for the engagement party was fine, my father insisted on something newer and nicer.

We weren't going to have any bridesmaids or groomsmen, which I suggested was the result of Coco not having any friends other than her brother which ended with her dropping the cake we were tasting on my lap.

The party after was going to be minor, something neither of us was looking forward to. Coco had apparently gotten her dress and everything seemed to be worked out. It was a lot of stress happening for an event that only two people, her mother, and my father, were looking forward to.

The Friday before the wedding, I was relaxed at home, my tux was hanging up and ready for the next day, and I had a glass of whiskey in one hand and a book in the other.

"Go away," I called at the knock on my door.

There was another knock, this one more insistent. I knew it wasn't my father. He didn't knock.

"Fuck off."

This time there wasn't a knock, the door blasted open.

"No." Came the response. Alistair pocketed his wand as he stepped into the room.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"It's the night before your wedding, Nott. it's time for a Stag party." Alistair grinned.

Alistair Mulicber was the result of shitty parents, like most of us, and more money than he knew what to do with. All of us were wealthy to some degree, the Mulcibers had the kind of money that didn't make sense. And Alistair so loved to spend it. While the rest of us with shitty parents avoided them, he outright antagonized his parents. The only thing that had saved him thus far from being outright murdered by them was the fact that he was their only child, and thus their heir.

"I'm not having a stag party."

"Yes you are, I already have it all set up, the guys are waiting for us."

"No, Mulciber." He grinned- something about Mulciber's grin was unnerving. I could see him practicing in front of a mirror, trying to make it as creepy as possible. And he succeeded. I could see his hand inching for his pocket where he'd just stowed his wand.

"Fine." I rolled my eyes. It wouldn't be the first time the man hexed one of us to get his way and I'm sure it would eventually happen again but I wasn't in the mood for it tonight. "But it has to be short and not too crazy."

"As if I would do anything crazy." He winked. "Come along, it's your last night as a single man, we have to make the most of it."

"There better not be strippers."

"No, I have something far better than strippers." Mulciber chirped.

I had a feeling it was going to be much, much worse than strippers.

—-

"You invited Baz?" I was shocked as we apparated out and walked toward the others. I could see Coco's twin brother standing among my friends.

"Yeah, I figured we're probably going to be stuck with him for the rest of our lives so might as well right?" he shrugged. "Also now you can feel assured that I'm not going to do anything that bad I invited the bride's brother."

"You'd still do something terrible, even with Baz here." Alistair paused, looking thoughtful then shrugged.

"It's called having a brand."

"It's called being a pain in the ass." I corrected.

"Who's a pain in the ass?" Broderick asked, he already held a bottle of booze in his hand, it was mostly full at least.

"All of you. What the fuck is this?" I gestured, stumbling a bit when I saw Draco was part of the gang. He seemed a bit more pale than usual, but he was there in his usual full black suit.

"This is your stag party. It's part of the wedding tradition." Blaise answered. "It's the whole gang, almost."

"I invited Goyle he's still not- you know." Alistair shrugged one shoulder. We knew, we all knew. The war in general had affected all of us but that final battle had really messed up Goyle.

"Ready?" Alistair asked,

"Where are we going?" I asked, wary of anything Alistair had planned for us.

"We're going into Muggle London." He answered happily.

"Muggle London?"

"Yes, I didn't want to go to The Dragon's Den because we do that all the time, but any other club in Wizarding London would be filled with weirdos whispering about us." He made a very good point, but going out to Muggle London meant no magic. At least not getting caught-

It was almost embarrassing how often I had to remind myself what department I worked for. No magic around muggles was allowed.

Alistair led the way out through to Muggle London, it wasn't as if we had never spent time in Muggle spaces. It was forbidden by our parents, which of course meant that we were going to do it. I was thirteen the first time we snuck off to anywhere that Muggles hung out, it had been exciting not because of what was around but because we knew that if our parents found out- we would be in a world of trouble.

Alistair led the way to the club that he had picked for us to go to, it seemed like the typical nightclub, with the line wrapping around the building. I heard Alistair mutter something and we walked right past the line and into the club. When we were in and a little out of the way, he repeated it, I saw at least one person jump in surprise.

"Mulciber- did you just-"

"Nope." He answered with an innocent smile. "Alright, lads, the rule is everyone has to buy a drink for the groom." He announced. "I'm off to get us a table, Zabini, get me a vodka soda." He requested before sweeping off into the club.

"He could have just thrown himself a party." I sighed. "Would have been easier. And more appreciated."

"As if he would miss the chance to do both." Blaise headed for the bar, presumably to order a drink for himself and the one that Alistair had requested.

"I'm surprised to see you out." I turned to look over at Draco, who shrugged.

"I figured since I won't be able to make it to the wedding, I can at least make it to the stag party." He gave a half-hearted smile.

"Wait what? You're not coming to the wedding?" I asked.

"Baz, let's go get drinks. Maybe we can figure out where Mulciber conjured up a table." Brody suggested.

"Yes, let's go." Baz agreed. If only his sister was half as agreeable as he was.

"What do you mean you're not coming to the wedding?"

"It- is going to be too much, Theodore, I can't." Draco shook his head. I scoffed.

"Draco, you can't be serious. This is my wedding."

"You don't even want to be there." Draco pointed out, he was correct but that wasn't the point.

"I need my friends to be there to support me."

"And you'll have most of them- I'm sorry, Theodore I just… I can't." Draco ran his hands through his hair and started to walk past me. I reached out and grabbed his arm, he whirled and pushed me back. "Don't- touch me." He took a deep breath and seemingly calmed down.

"Draco-"

"I need a drink." He walked away, leaving me standing there on my own.

If my job found out about what went down at my stag party, I would probably end up fired. It took me a while to find the table that Alistair had gotten us but it turned out to be up in the VIP section, a table I'm not entirely convinced was there before we got there. But it was here now and I was just happy to have a place to sit in the crowded club.

Alistair had dragged Broderick and Blaise off to the dance floor with him, Draco still hadn't made it to the table- despite the fact that I had gotten to the bar after him, had gotten my drink, and had found the table. That left me alone with my future brother-in-law. Bastian had a drink in his hand and he was leaning back against his seat, looking down on the dance floor. An uncountable number of people gyrated below us. Most of them moved to the beat, others… didn't.

"Did Coco have plans for a Hen party?" I asked, raising my voice slightly to be heard over the music.

"No, When I left she was getting ready to brew some potion and, hopefully, had plans to go to bed early." He answered, lifting his drink to his lips. "As you so kindly pointed out, we don't really have friends."

"Oh… right…" I cleared my throat. "That was rather rude of me."

"Incredibly rude." He agreed. "But you were right. We didn't really- feel we needed anyone else." I quirked an eyebrow, remaining silent. "And you and your friends basically made us social pariahs." He finally added.

"Wait we what?"

"First day of school, Draco declared that he wouldn't associate with the family of a man so low as to try and drag down the reputation of a family as high ranking as the Lestranges. We possibly could have found friends outside of our house but- that felt like giving in." He shrugged. "And Coco would rather remain friendless than look like she's giving in."

"That- sounds so much like Coco." I nodded. "Well- for what it's worth, I am sorry. Draco probably would be too."

"I'm sure." Baz shrugged, finishing off his drink. "But alas." He put the glass down and we both stared at it a moment before it at least hit me that it wouldn't refill itself. Muggle Club. "Right, I'll be back." He stood up and walked off, leaving me alone at the table, I looked down at the dancers- I could see my friends all dancing together, except for Draco, who I couldn't see. If I wasn't annoyed I would have gone looking for him, but I was, so I didn't.

Tomorrow was the big day.

Shit.

—-

"I feel like Death."' Mulciber muttered, rubbing his head. We had sent Blaise off to get hangover potions. The rest of us were draped over furniture in my room.

"You look like it too." Broderick offered up.

"Go fuck yourself, Avery."

I knew I needed to get up, the wedding was in a couple of hours. I needed to shower and shave and get to the church where the wedding would be taking place.

All of that would just have to wait until after Blaise got back. I could hear my head pounding

"Son of a bitch." Broderick snapped. Could he hear it too? A moment later the sound of one of my windows opening, I opened one eye and watched a bird fly away. "It's for Mulciber?"

I'd never seen Alistair move so fast in my life. He zoomed across the room, apparently, Death could move. He snatched it out of Broderick's hands and slammed the bathroom door. I felt that slam in every one of my nerve endings.

"Fuck off." I snarled.

Blaise apparently decided it would be more fun to take his sweet time because it was another hour before he was handing out sweet relief.

That gave me even less time. I quickly showered and shaved, making sure I didn't miss a single spot before going out to get my tux.

The guys were still there- save for Draco who had actually reappeared the night before long enough to mutter an apology and a goodnight then he vanished again.

I quickly dressed, my eyes on the mirror as Broderick poured himself another drink, his second since we got the hangover potion.

"Broderick," I commented, going back to my tie. "Try and get through the actual ceremony before you black out, thank you." Brody gave me a death glare but he did put the glass back down.

With almost no time to spare, we made it to the church. I wasn't sure why exactly this was taking place at a church, as neither of our families were religious but it seemed like a pretty normal place for a wedding to take place.

"There you are." My father grabbed my arm as soon as we apparated into the space.

"Here I am." I let him drag me through the church, into one of the back rooms.

"I told you to be here an hour ago."

"I was still getting ready. it is my wedding day after all." I answered drily. the look my father gave me would send a lesser man running. But I had grown up with it, with all of his death glares.

"then perhaps it would behoove you to not act like a child." He responded. "The wedding itself won't take very long, it is the typical vows, then we will go to the party that has been prepared at the Selwyn's home."

"Fantastic." I deadpanned. My father tightened my tie- tighter and tighter until it was far too tight. That got my attention.

"Do not think- boy- that marriage means you are an equal. You are still my child and I will not tolerate disrespect."

"Okay- okay, I'm sorry." I rasped out. He loosened the tie a little and I stepped back, rubbing the spot where the knot had dug into my throat.

"Very good." the door opened and my friends came filing in. That made my father take a big step back. "After the party, the two of you will go to the hotel." Our wedding gift from my father was an evening at an expensive hotel in London.

"Right."

"The wedding does have to be consummated."

"Yes, I'm aware. You got us the hotel room for the express purpose of me fucking Coco Selwyn." The words felt like a rock in my stomach. Anger flashed in my father's eyes but he seemed to remember at the last minute that my friends were there, his shoulders remained tense but he didn't say a word.

Time flew by and the next thing I knew, I was out in the chapel, standing in front of the pulpit, the officiant stood next to me, all of us waiting on Coco to come down the aisle.

The pews were not packed, It was mostly just friends, as neither of us actually have family outside of one parent and in her case, her brother. As well as a couple of acquaintances, probably friends of my dad or her mother.

the music started and everyone stood, turning to the back to see as Coco stepped out.

I froze.

She looked incredible, the dress was perfect, the top fitted to her body, the skirt draping down over her hips. With every step she took, I could see a peek of red high heels, because of course, even on her wedding day, Coco Selwyn would be wearing her red lips, that matched her red nails and her red shoes. Bastian was on her arm, leading her down the aisle, the two of them quietly muttering at each other. She grinned at something he said, her entire face lighting up and I felt a flash of jealousy, knowing she could light up like that but would never do so for me.

they reached the front of the church where I stood, the ceremony began with the officiant thanking everyone for showing up. Coco's eyes were on mine, her blue eyes clear, seemed she hadn't spent her last free night drinking as I had- or else she had better hangover potions.

Compared to her lips the rest of her makeup was minimal, pale pinks and soft browns on her eyelids, a dusting of blush pink on her cheeks, her lips were the show stoppers- as they always seemed to be. A bright fire engine red with a smooth shining layer of gloss over the top. I'd spent a lot of time thinking about Coco's lips since that first kiss we shared and it might have been my imagination but somehow they seemed even more plump than usual, demanding to be kissed.

Tonight was our wedding night, and all of the sudden I wasn't so upset by what we would be expected to do tonight.

The vows were read the typical vows about to have and to hold. I quickly spit out an I Do, my eyes not leaving Coco. Coco hesitated when it came time for her to say it, looking from me to the man in front of us, and then back to me.

"I do." She finally agreed.

"You may now kiss the bride." the officiant announced. There was a moment, a split second where Coco and I stared at each other, neither of us seemingly willing to initiate the kiss. I reached out, my hand cupping the back of her neck, pulling her in for the kiss, Her hands came up around to connect behind my neck, holding me there as the kiss deepened her lips had an earthy- almost herbal taste, mixed with the minty taste of either toothpaste or a breath mint. We broke the kiss and she reached up to wipe away the gloss- her red lipstick remained perfectly intact, it was just the gloss that had smeared.

I could feel it on my face and even against my tongue.

"I am proud to announce for the first time, Mr and Mrs Theodore Nott!" the music played and I turned to walk back down the aisle with my bride.

My legs buckled and I crumpled to the ground, there were gasps, and someone cried out. For a moment I thought it might have been Coco but that thought was squashed as she stepped over my body, looking back, she blew me a kiss and walked down the aisle alone, leaving everyone else to deal with me, unable to move unable to talk, but fully able to think and know for a fact that this was something my wife had done.

and she was going to pay for it.