"Where's the culprit? It looks like you've only brought the same people as yesterday."

We found ourselves once again in the audience hall of the Scarlet Devil Mansion, much as we had the day before. Remilia was regarding us with a sleepy smile from her seat on the throne, having just woken up in what, I assume, was the early morning for a vampire.

"I assure you madam, the culprit behind this crime is in this very mansion with us as we speak! Simply allow me, divine detective Sanae Kochiya to inform you as to the nefarious scheme that they have wrought, and I will reveal the whole of this caper in a single stroke."

"I don't remember ever asking you to do anything. I thought Renko was investigating this."

"Sanae is a very eager part-timer with the Hifuu Detective Agency," Renko said, stepping forward. "Please hear her out, I guarantee that it will at least be interesting."

"Oh really? Alright then, let's hear it, part-timer." Remilia crossed one leg over the other on her throne and leaned to one side, supporting her chin with the heel of her palm.

"Very well!" Sanae declared, turning and pacing away from the throne. "Leave it to me!" she glanced over her shoulder with a smug expression, then, with her back still turned to Remilia, she began to speak, turning her head just enough that she could be heard. "Our investigative efforts have uncovered that all of the incidences of irregular weather plaguing Gensokyo have shared one thing in common: the presence of an unusual scarlet cloud, which has been sighted whenever unusual meteorological events occur."

"A scarlet cloud?"

Sanae whirled, turning not to face Remilia, but instead turning her profile to her. She began to pace back and forth, still smiling smugly as she continued. "Yes, a scarlet cloud. A cloud that was, at times, cleverly concealed above the very weather it created, but was in multiple instances observed all the same by multiple witnesses. That cloud appears to be a result of a disturbance in the natural qi of the world, likely due to the unnatural disruption of the typical and divinely ordained rhythms of the heavens. In other words, someone in this world has been attempting to interfere with the domain of the gods and in so doing left an imbalance in nature that became an identifying signature on their interference. A veritable fingerprint on their crime traced in ominous scarlet! Who would go to such lengths to try and reshape this world for their own benefit? Well, the answer is very simple. In fact, it's been in front of us from the very beginning."

Sanae paused in her oration, eyes closed and chin cradled in her hand. Then all at once her arm darted into her sleeve and came out with the same charm-tipped wand she had been waving around yesterday. Thrusting it out at Remilia, she made her accusation:

"The culprit is none other than you, miss Remilia Scarlet! You hired us to investigate this matter thinking that the best way to throw off the efforts of the Hifuu Detective Agency was to have us on your payroll, but it won't work! Your crimson-colored fingerprints are all over this case!"

-.-.-.-.-

If this were a manga, the only sound effect for this scene would be "..." or perhaps the faint buzz of a fly meandering through the air, or even the soft whoosh of a tumbleweed rolling by. As it was, there were none of those sounds to break the tension, only the unbearable weight of Sanae's awkward accusation hanging in the air.

Apparently though, it didn't bother Sanae a bit. After only a moment's silence, she pressed on.

"The nature of the Incident itself was my biggest clue. You already have a history of trying to alter the skies of Gensokyo by enveloping the world in a scarlet mist. But even beyond that, this mansion happens to have among its staff a gatekeeper with the ability to manipulate qi directly. Surely you didn't expect a great detective like myself to ignore such a coincidence! This is a clear sign that this Incident is the result of a collaboration between the whole of the Scarlet Devil Mansion! It was your aim to cover the whole of Gensokyo in scarlet clouds and take over the world! The fact that you've been unable to go outside due to the rainstorms was a ruse intended to give you an ironclad alibi when, in fact, the crime was being committed by your subordinates at your command! It was Meiling who affected the weather for you here, through manipulation of the natural qi of the surrounding environment. Meanwhile you've been sending Patchouli out to change the weather in the Forest of Magic! Your maid, Sakuya, with her ability to manipulate time has been visiting Youkai Mountain, prolonging the rainy season around my shrine. In each of these cases you concealed your henchwomen's presence by creating a cloud for them to hide in, but being you, you couldn't help but leave your scarlet fingerprint on your creation. Your own personal touch!"

Still the shocked silence stretched on.

"No clever comeback? Well, I'll spare you the need to think of one. The proof of your involvement is the fact that it's been endlessly sunny at the Hakurei shrine! Everyone knows that Reimu once exterminated you, and now the weather is unseasonable everywhere but one place -the Hakurei shrine! Clearly, the culprit behind all of this must fear Reimu's wrath, so they must be someone she's exterminated in the past. Leaving things nice and summery at the shrine ensured that the lazy miko who never acts unless an Incident affects her directly would be no threat to your plans. You may have told us the weather was keeping you from going outside, but in actuality, you had set it up to keep Reimu from going out! It was a daring and clever scheme, but now the jig is up!"

Remilia still remained silent. At this point she had shifted from shocked amazement at Sanae's ranting to amused curiosity at just how far she would go.

"Alright then. You may have defeated me yesterday, but today I have the power of the law on my side. Come along quietly, for the sake of peace and the good of Gensokyo, or I'll be forced to show you the true power of the Moriya shrine. Lady Kanako, Lady Suwako, lend me your strength that I may shine the light of truth into the heart of this darkness!"

At last Remilia spoke. A single word. "Sakuya!"

Instantly the maid was at her side, bowing respectfully. "You wanted to see me, milady?"

"This wrong-colored shrine maiden just told me she wants to play with Flan. Go show her the way."

"As you wish, milady."

In an instant, Sakuya had appeared behind Sanae, twisting the arm that had been holding the wand a moment before behind her back. Smiling brightly, but with both eyes closed, Sakuya leaned over Sanae's shoulder. "If you would just walk this way, miss. Please excuse us, milady."

"Hey wait, what are you doing? Are you like one of those villains who attacks in the middle of the hero's transformation sequence? That's inexcusably rude! You can't interrupt a great detective's deductions with violence!"

Bowing with just her head and still smiling. Sakuya nodded toward Remilia and the two of them instantly vanished.

-.-.-.-.-

"Is that what you call interesting?" Remilia asked, eying us lazily from her position on her throne.

"Well, I would hope you at least found it to be an amusing diversion," Renko said with a formal bow.

"I suppose it's a necessary measure to have the foil present their specious theory first to make the great detective's deductions look more impressive, but personally, I could do without the theatrics."

"Ah, as ought to be expected of a lady of your intelligence, ma'am, you've seen right through my tactics."

"With that out of the way, I trust you have the actual culprit for me?"

"Well, you've just caught her yourself, have you not, detective? I imagine even as we speak she's being punished for her crimes."

"What? Do you mean to say that that green miko is responsible for this Incident?"

"Indeed she is. By her own admission, Sanae is not a miko, but a wind priestess. Who better to manipulate wind and rain to her liking? Her aim was to make it appear as if you had been responsible for the Incident, then exterminate you in order to improve the prestige of her shrine. It must be a difficult life for you to be such a visible and well-recognized icon of power and nobility. We're lucky that you have the cunning insight and quick wits to have seen through her plan as quickly as you did."

"Oh, I see, then by letting her present her theory in this way, you were just goading her into exposing her foolish plan before me?"

"I'll admit I was somewhat at a loss on how to pin the crime on her, even though I was sure she had committed it. I'm lucky to be in the presence of such a brilliant armchair detective, who's superhuman wisdom allowed her to see the true culprit for what she was. I doubt there a criminal in Gensokyo who could hide from your sagacious gaze, ma'am. In fact, I expect there are more out there just waiting to be found."

"Oh? How do you mean?"

"Well, while your reasoning in punishing Sanae was undoubtedly correct, I suspect that she may not have acted alone, or rather, she may not have been the only person with the same idea. Your reputation precedes you across the breadth of this land, and being as feared and storied as you are, I expect that there are other beings, human and youkai alike, who might want to keep your invincible might from putting a swift end to their plans. Now that Sanae's gone and proven that even a human can keep you confined to your mansion, there's bound to be a few others who get it into their head to try the same thing, even with Sanae having been defeated. If anything they might even think you'd blame your continued inability to go outside on her, though I know you're far too smart for that. With your permission ma'am, I'd like to continue our commission, and resume searching for any additional culprits who might think to try and confine you here."

Remilia stared intently at Renko for a moment before speaking. "Very well then, there's just one thing."

"Yes ma'am?"

"I'll have Sakuya bring your fees by your office tomorrow. I'll expect the next culprit to be delivered the day after that."

"Of course, ma'am. Thank you once again for using our services." Renko bowed deeply, then, still bent over, she gave me a nudge. I bowed too. "Now then, if you'll excuse us, we have work to do."

Renko turned, with a perfectly calm expression plastered on her face and made her way to the door. I followed closely behind her. It was only once the heavy door had shut behind us with a thud that she let out an explosive sigh.

"What the hell was that, Renko?"

"Just me finding the culprit and delivering her to our employer. For the time being."

"You can't honestly believe what you just said, though."

"I honestly believe that Sanae blundered into that trap on her own and what I just told Remilia will get her off our back for the day. Now lets go find Sanae, or what's left of her."

"Oh that's right! Do you think she's okay?"

"Flandre knows she's our friend, so I'm sure she won't die. It's a good thing you made such good friends with her though, Merry. She's probably not having too good a time though, so let's go get her quick."

I was too weary of all of the schemes, lies and counter-schemes to even sigh any more. I took Renko's hand as she offered it, and the two of us paced down the hallway, looking for a stairway we could take to the basement.

-.-.-.-.-

And so, after what felt like an hour of wandering the seemingly endless halls, we eventually found ourselves back at the door of the cell where I had once read And Then There Were None to Remilia's younger sister. The strong and complex wards that had once guarded the iron-banded wooden door were now gone. Perhaps they were no longer needed.

Renko knocked on the door, but there was no response. Being as the sun was still up outside, I wondered if Flandre would be sleeping? If so, I wondered how well she might tolerate being woken up. Renko put her hand on the door's knob. There no longer seemed to be any lock or ward securing it, as it turned easily. Even without the safeguards that had acted as a clear warning sign the last time we were here, I couldn't help but feel some measure of the same dread as she eased the door open. Renko must have felt it too, as her voice when she pushed the door wide was a broken, halting whisper.

"Young miss, are you there?"

Hearing no response, we poked our heads inside. The room was dimly lit, with only the faintest ghost of a flame flickering in the tableside lamp and most of the light in the room coming from the soft glow of the seven-colored jewels adorning Flandre's wings, which were bobbing faintly in the gloom. It seemed that Flandre must be here, but where was Sanae?

"Oh, Renko, Merry, is that you? Are you both okay?" It was Sanae's voice, sounding as bright and cheery as ever.

Breathing a sigh of relief, we stepped into the room. "I think that's supposed to be my line, Sanae. Is everything all right in here?"

"Well, Sakuya wasn't too friendly when she dropped me in here, but Flandre's a little angel. I can barely see you though, let me turn up the light." There was a squeak and a faint hiss as Sanae adjusted the knob on the lamp and then the room came into view in its warm glow, revealing a somewhat unexpected scene.

Sanae was sitting on the edge of Flandre's bed, with the young vampire herself sitting on her lap. She was running her fingers along Flandre's neck and head, tickling her softly as one might an affectionate cat.

"Meow" Flandre said, both of her eyes closed. "That feels nice."

"Oh, did you manage to befriend Remilia's little sister too, Sanae?"

"I think so, what do you think, Flandre?"

Flandre opened her eyes and hopped off of Sanae's lap, smiling up at us. "Yeah! Sanae's nice. She's soft and she's good at tickling."

Just what had the two of them been up to in the time that Renko and I had been looking for them?

"Flandre's such a sweet little girl. I can't believe she's Remilia's sister."

"She's cute, but she's incredibly powerful. I'm glad you two didn't get in a fight, I'm sure she could put a hole straight through this wall if she wanted to."

"Well of course, that's the whole trope, right? The most harmless looking one has to be the strongest."

Truly, common sense had no hold on the mind of this living goddess. I wondered if Sanae's conception of Flandre's character could account for her having undergone compressed centuries of magical mental influence.

"The heart of a little child invested with tremendous world-shaking power. Maybe these two have a lot in common, actually." Renko mused.

"I'm not a 'little child,'" they both said in unison, sporting nearly identical pouts.

"But nevermind about all that now," Flandre declared, bouncing up and down. "Miss Merry's here again! Read me a story, Merry!"

"We'll have to go and get something from the library, but I'm sure we can find something you'd like."

"Oh, is this a regular event? Can I play someone in the story? I want to be the hero who vanquishes evil!" Sanae said, smiling broadly.

"It's not a play!" Flandre protested. "And if there's a hero, it'll be me!"

And so I spent the rest of that afternoon reading stories to children in a dimly lit cell.

-.-.-.-.-

According to accounts I heard later, Remilia must have harbored some suspicion as to Renko's explanation after all, as, even though she paid our fees, she dispatched Sakuya to abduct the culprit behind the Incident later the next day. That, however, is a story for another time.