Notes:
So some of you may have noticed that this chapter is only half as long as my usual ones. I knew it'll be the last chapter for this episode when I started it but I had no idea how much I'd be able to write for it. So I decided if it was under 5K I would just stick it on last week's update and made a longer chapter for it. But I managed to get it just over half my usual length. I thought about starting episode 2 and sticking it on the bottom of this one to make it my usual length but then I thought; this episode has been going on for so long, episode 2 should have its own fresh start
Next week we'll be back to normal length though and it will also be the beginning of episode 2
So yay! Anyway, hope you enjoy!
End Notes
Arthur froze under Merlin's fingertips, feeling the fingers pushing through his hair. The only person that touched his hair was Morris when he was running a brush through it in the mornings. It wasn't exactly often that someone acted so brazen as to invite themselves to touch him. It was strange but then again, he supposed it made sense that Merlin would be the one to do it. The kid didn't exactly know what was proper and touching someone you hardly knew was something that Arthur would put in the 'improper' section. He still didn't stop it though, strangely enough.
And was it just him or did Merlin have to stand strangely close just to reach his bangs? And what was that little smile on his face about?
He did nothing to stop Merlin until, "Arthur," a sudden voice called him.
Arthur flinched, surprised by the sudden call of his name, snapped out of whatever trance he'd fallen into. That was when he seemed to realize that he was allowing Merlin to touch him, in full view of anybody still in the room, including his father. Arthur jerked away from Merlin so suddenly that Merlin nearly fell over. But Arthur didn't notice, turning his attention to the king. He had to clear his throat, "Er, yes father?" He asked.
Merlin straightened up, smile dropping as he shot Arthur an annoyed glare. Stupid prince. Well if he wanted to go around with messy bangs, Merlin wasn't going to stop him. It wasn't like Merlin could talk on the messy hair department anyway.
Uther gave the two boys a stern look with narrowed eyes, deciding to ignore the scene that he'd just seen. The two boys had looked oddly close, the way they had been standing together just a moment before. It was unsettling but they were married now so Uther didn't comment. If his son was showing interest towards his husband then that was better than Arthur doing something stupid and causing them all to lose their kingdom. Which could only happen if Merlin managed to prove that Arthur had dishonored him, AKA: if Arthur cheated.
But maybe he was just thinking about it to much though. The events of the past hour forcing his mind to see things that weren't there. He knew his son enough to know that Arthur would never think of a man as he would a woman. And as much as it pained him to think about Arthur actually wanting to be with a man, he didn't have to worry about that here. He doubted Merlin would have been his son's type anyway.
Besides, he still had to deal with the chandelier and body on the floor before he could even contemplate Arthur's relationship with his consort.
Uther gave his son a meaningful look, "Shouldn't you be retiring to your room with your consort? It is getting late. It's been a tiring day, I'm sure you're ready to get things over with so you can get some rest."
Merlin frowned, remembering with sudden clarity that he couldn't go to bed just yet. He was supposed to go to Arthur's room and...do what? He remembered all the jokes that Tristian had made when they were traveling from Ealdor to Camelot. Something about how Arthur was going to have fun with his mouth. At that reminder, he prodded his mouth with his tongue again, still not understanding the joke. And then there had been Morris who had told him to just 'lay back and take it'. What the hell did that mean? Lay back and take what? And why did nobody want to tell him anything?
At his side, Arthur stiffened. The prince had gone a shade paler than he usually was and a muscle in his jaw was twitching. He had an unfocused look in his eye as he registered what his father's words meant.
Right.
How had he forgotten? That one thing that had been nagging at him. The one thing that was actually worse than being married to Merlin.
He was supposed to be retiring to his room...with Merlin. After a marriage, there was a consummation to make the marriage binding. Which meant that right now, he was expected to take Merlin up to his room, take his clothes off and fuck him...he was going to be ill.
"Arthur?" Merlin suddenly said, reaching out to prod at his elbow. He didn't like the look on Arthur's face. Was he going to be sick? Did he need a bucket to throw up in?
Arthur yanked away from Merlin, jerking back as if he'd been burned. Merlin snatched his hand back startled, completely baffled over the prince's intense reaction. But Arthur was taking several steps away from him, looking at him with wild eyes. He was looking at Merlin as if he expected the boy to jump him or something.
"Arthur." Uther said as well, giving his son a look. A look that said to get yourself together.
Arthur had to swallow hard, curling his fingers into fists at his side. His father was right, he had to get himself together. He couldn't be seen freaking out in the middle of the public. There were still many people still milling around, taking their precious time to get home. And what if rumors spread about why Arthur was freaking out. That he was freaking out over having...sex...with his husband. Who freaked out about that when they were married to somebody?
Just thinking the word sex and insinuating it with him and Merlin made a cold sweat break out over his skin. He could almost feel his shirt sticking to his back, thankfully shielded from view by his cape.
And wasn't Merlin a virgin? That was what Leon had said, right? That was why he had sent Morris to him to explain things. So why wasn't Merlin freaking out as bad as he was. Did he want to have sex with him? Oh god, he hoped Merlin wasn't having any delusions of what their first time would be like. Arthur had no idea how he was going to force himself to do this, yet along go any extra mile to make a virgin's first time 'special'.
If Merlin expected something like roses and candlelight and to be romanced as Arthur popped his cherry, then he was going to be sorely disappointed.
He'd be lucky if Arthur didn't throw him out into the hall still naked after they were done.
"Arthur! Will you stop looking at me like that!" Merlin suddenly said loudly. Arthur felt as if he'd just been jolted back into his body. He just realized he'd been standing there staring at Merlin as if he were some kind of alien.
Arthur quickly averted his eyes only to meet eyes with his father. Was it him or did his father actually looked as if he pitied him? He hated that look but at the same time, good. His father should feel bad for what he had done to him.
And he didn't want to be in his father's presence any longer. But did he want to be in Merlin's instead? He didn't have much of a choice.
"It's time for me to bring my consort upstairs." Arthur told his father blandly, already walking passed him. "Come along, Merlin." He called over his shoulder. He refused to admit if his voice cracked or not.
Merlin glanced between Uther and Arthur confused before following the prince. "You're not trying to escort me again, are you?" Merlin asked to the prince's hunched shoulders. "Because I am not holding your arm again."
Arthur had to stop himself from shouting at him in front of the few witnesses still hanging around. Really? Merlin was talking about holding his arm? He had bigger problems to deal with! Like how he was going to deal with having another man's 'business' pressed against his own. He wished all he had to worry about was Merlin holding his arm!
"Arthur," Uther suddenly called out when the boy's were several feet away. Arthur stiffened, sure he wasn't going to like what his father said. And true enough, he didn't. "Do be gentle, he did just save your life."
Yes, another reminder of his near death. Let's not throw that into the crises he was having. First he was thrown into this unwanted marriage, then he barely survived a near death encounter that he still hadn't processed, and now he was leading his husband away for their first and hopefully only 'romp' together.
Plus, he had to hear his father talking about his sex life! Just another spot of humiliation, knowing that his father knew he was about to have sex with a man.
Arthur didn't say a word to his father. He didn't look back at him or anything. He just started walking again.
"Arthur, what is that supposed to mean?" Merlin nagged at him, following so close that he was practically on Arthur's heels. "Be gentle? What exactly are we going up there to do?"
Arthur clenched his jaw because seriously? Was Merlin being stupid on purpose? He had to know exactly what they were going to do. He'd instructed Morris to go talk to him after all and the manservant had never failed an order before.
And speaking of Morris, the manservant was standing next to the door. Arthur didn't give him a glance as he walked out.
But Merlin following behind sure saw the shit eating grin that Morris wore. "Have fun." Morris said cheekily to the consort. "And remember what I told you."
Merlin shot him an annoyed look as he left the room. He didn't consider just 'lay back and take it' very good advice. And Arthur had another thing coming if he thought Merlin was just going to do it without knowing what it meant.
"Arthur, what is going on?" Merlin demanded as he practically had to jog up the steps to keep up with the prince. "You need to tell me something! Why are we going upstairs?" But Arthur didn't say a word. He was without a doubt, ignoring everything Merlin had to say. The prince had his own problems to deal with, let along dealing with Merlin's as well. "Arthur Pendragon!" Merlin exclaimed as they reached the royal hallway. "Are you just going to ignore me!"
Arthur had felt a growing ball of anxiety and irritation because Merlin hadn't stopped rambling the entire walk up to their rooms. He had gone on and on demanding answers and asking questions that Arthur didn't want to answer. Questions that Morris could have answered during their conversation. If Merlin had questions, why hadn't he just asked Morris when he'd sent the manservant to talk to him?
"Just shut up and follow me." Arthur grunted, barely able to force the words out as he opened his door.
"The least you can do is not be bossy." Merlin grumbled. He looked longingly down the hall where his own room was. Even though he much preferred going down to his room in Gaius' chambers, he wouldn't mind going to his room just down the hall right now. At least it was somewhere familiar compared to Arthur's room.
Merlin almost felt like he was walking into the lion's den or something. He didn't know what was going to happen in that room but clearly it was something important since everyone seemed to know but nobody was talking. Was it some kind of royal tradition? Something the royal members did after they married like some kind of ritual that could only be done in private? Maybe that was it because otherwise, they could have just done whatever back downstairs in front of the people.
"Aren't you coming?" Arthur snapped, his anxiety levels reaching an all time high. His hands were clammy and his grip on his door handle was pretty much the only thing keeping him still standing at this point. And Merlin taking his sweet time walking in was not helping in the least.
Arthur had to wince when he heard his own words. Aren't you coming? It sounded far to close to 'Are you cumming?' Way to close. And with it brought the image of Merlin in mid-organism, his face flushed and mouth lax as Arthur finished up the job. Oh god, how was this going to work? There was no way Arthur would be able to reach his completion. There was no chance that Arthur would be able to make Merlin finish, not with the way he was feeling.
Fuck, they were both going to be traumatized after all was said and done, weren't they?
Arthur had to physically force himself not to slam the door in Merlin's face. He had to stop himself from doing something that he'd regret later. His father wouldn't be pleased to know that the marriage wasn't 'real' if it wasn't consummated.
Merlin walked into the room, looking around with a touch of curiosity. It looked actually just like his own. Except where Merlin's room was done in shades of teal, Arthur's room was done in shades of Pendragon red. And there was a small dining table that Merlin didn't have in his room.
After Merlin walked in, Arthur had to force himself to take a breath, trying to calm his heart that was beating like a jackrabbit in his rib cage. He closed the door so quietly that there was barely a click heard as it shut. And when Arthur let go of the door, his hand was visibly shaking. He had to physically grab onto his hand with the other to force it to stop.
He'd never been so anxious in his life. Not even his first time with a girl when he'd lost his virginity had been this nerve wracking.
Merlin walked further into the room, not noticing Arthur's anxiety ridden shaken form behind him. He looked around curiously.
The prince's desk was overfilled with papers and parchments and forms and ink bottles and quills, all neatly placed in some semblance of order. He almost wanted to start digging through it. Just to try and get a look at what Arthur spent his time on. But he didn't. At least not with Arthur watching him.
Merlin stopped walking, leaning against the bed post of Arthur's four poster bed. Right beside it, he caught sight of the door. The same door that led into his own room right on the other side. Only Madame Teresa had been right. Arthur had blocked it off. There was some kind of rack up against it, a big old heavy thing. A key rack. It looked like there were some drawers on the bottom and then a flat surface like a table. There were wooden posts that stuck out of the table part and connected to a flat surface going up and down. On this surface were a handful of hooks sticking out. And each hook held a different key, big and old fashioned. Each key was hanging off of a large metal circle and they were hung on the hooks.
But the rack was most certainly a big thing, made out of mahogany. It looked as if it would take one or two of the bigger knights to be able to move it out of the way. Merlin definitely couldn't have moved it by himself, not without using his magic to assist. No wonder his door hadn't budged when he'd tried to open it.
Good. Because that meant that Arthur probably couldn't move it by himself as well. Which meant that Merlin didn't have to worry about Arthur busting in on him through this door when he was doing something the prince shouldn't be seeing.
Merlin didn't look back at first when Arthur suddenly asked, "Did Morris explain?"
Arthur had gone numb, staring at Merlin with unfocused eyes. His question to Merlin had pretty much only been a way to buy some time for him. Any extra time would be a godsend, even if it was just an extra minute before they had to do this.
Merlin finally turned away from the door leading to his room to glare at Arthur. "Morris was absolutely no help!" He snapped. "I had no idea what he was talking about. So will just tell me why I'm in here and not in my own bed?" He demanded, walking up to Arthur, the irritation was clear in every step he took.
The foggy, glassy look in Arthur's eyes seemed to clear, "What?" The prince demanded. "What do you mean that Morris was no help? I sent him specifically to tell you what is happening. Leon told me you had no idea."
"I don't have any idea." Merlin snapped. It was frustrating, clearly being the only one out of the loop. "Leon wouldn't tell me anything when I asked him. And all Morris did was make me more confused. So I'm asking you and I want some actual answers because even Tristian made me confused!"
Arthur brought a hand to his hair, feeling his crown against his brow, not believing this. Did Merlin seriously still not know what was supposed to be happening right now? He felt as if he had been knocked off his feet, or as if the earth had shifted just because of this and he'd been thrown off his feet.
He had told Morris to do it specifically so he wouldn't have to. Had the manservant done it in some over complicated way that Merlin hadn't understood? Or maybe Morris hadn't clarified enough and just confused him.
This could not be happening, not to him of all people. The frustration was building in his chest, wondering how in god's green earth had he ended up with the one person on earth who was so entirely clueless that it was unbelievable.
And Merlin was still in front of him, hands planted on his hips and giving him what he no doubt thought was a very convincing death glare.
"...What did Tristian tell you?" Arthur grunted. He had to start somewhere but damn it if he was going into detail. He wished he had drunken more at the party before he'd nearly been stabbed to death by that sorceress. This was a conversation that he could only survive if he was drunk off his rocker.
Merlin pursed his lips, averting his eyes away from Arthur. "Something about how you were going to eat me alive. Please tell me how does that make sense at all?"
Arthur felt his eye start to twitch. He knew exactly what the Knight meant by that and he was not pleased, pissed actually. He didn't want his knights to speculate what his sex life was like. He wanted even less inquiries about the sex life he was supposed to have if the other person was Merlin.
Although Arthur felt his stomach roil and curl in disgust at the idea of having any kind of sex life with a man.
"Oh," Merlin kept on, waving a hand. "And something about how you were gonna have a lot of fun with my mouth tonight."
Arthur's eyes dropped to Merlin's mouth at the mention of it. At those thin pink lips and the slight wetness to it as Merlin's little pink tongue shot out to wet his lips. Having fun with his mouth? It brought the very unwelcome image to his mind. Of Merlin on his knees, mouth stretched wide with Arthur's cock. Arthur loved a good blowjob like the next guy but then again, he wouldn't have been able to get over the fact that a guy was giving it to him. Besides, he doubted Merlin would even be able to take all of it. Not to brag or anything but Arthur was a touch on the bigger than average side.
At the thought, Arthur suddenly got a chill down his spine, as if he had a million little spiders crawling over his skin. Or maybe he still had a stray spider web that had fallen under his clothes somewhere. God, he hoped that was it. At least he could remove a spider web. What he couldn't remove was the feeling of spiders crawling all up under his skin.
No, no, no. How was this going to work? How was Arthur supposed to even start getting hard so that they could do this? There was no way that Arthur could order Merlin to drop to his knees and suck him off so the pressure itself would get him hard more than the one actually doing it. Not only was it wrong on so many levels, a boy touching him like that, but Merlin was liable to try punching him again. And Arthur might just allow him to do it this time without stopping him. At least the hit to his jaw would feel better than what he was feeling right now.
"I still don't know what Tristian meant." Merlin started talking about. "I thought at first that it might mean you like to talk. But now that I've met you, that's probably not what he meant, right?"
Arthur brought a hand up to rub at his head, feeling yet another headache working it's way through his temple. "No, it's not." He grunted.
"So then tell me what he meant." Merlin demanded in an almost bossy tone. He watched Arthur with narrowed eyes, trying to figure it out himself but nothing he thought of seemed right. Or maybe he was just looking at this from the wrong direction...or maybe he was just off completely.
Arthur scowled at the bossy tone the boy had emitted. His husband was such a brat. What he would give to have the boy occupy his mouth with something else other than giving Arthur migraines. Not with his cock of course, Merlin would probably try to bite him even if Arthur could stomach the thought of actually attempting it.
"How about," Arthur practically forced out. "You just don't talk to Tristian anymore." He was going to have to track that Knight down, wasn't he? Let him know not to talk to Merlin about anything explicit again. Cause Merlin was going to show up demanding more answers from Arthur, wasn't he? And hell if Arthur was going to explain anything right now or at any other time in the near future.
It was just one more thing added to the list of stuff he would have to do.
Merlin shrugged, "I don't think I liked him very much anyway." The guy seemed like he was just a tad to much of a dick for Merlin's taste anyway. Although he still had nothing on Arthur's level of being a jerk.
Glancing around the room, Merlin made himself comfortable by sitting on the far end of Arthur's bed. He felt himself sink a little into the mattress, similar to how the bed in his room next door did.
Arthur scowled, seeing the boy on his bed. Nobody had ever been on his bed but him and seeing somebody make themself comfortable without a care in the world pissed him off. Especially when he had other things on his mind. Like how was he supposed to start this? How did men even start this together?
Was it different from when he flirted with a girl and she took him to one of the many rooms the castle had? It had to be because no way was he flirting with Merlin to get the boy to take off his pants.
Was he supposed to shove the boy down on the bed, climb on top of him and hope that he got the message and went with it? Hope that he wouldn't say a word when Arthur flipped him onto his stomach, pulled him up by the waist so that his arse was in the air and slid his pants down his hips just far enough to give the prince the access he needed to do what had to be done.
Not a chance in hell was that happening either. Merlin was more mouthy than he was worth, he would probably have a lot to say about it. Plus, Arthur would probably scare the crap out of him and Arthur was a lot of things but he'd never had to be aggressive to get sex before.
But then again, he'd only been with women that wanted to be with him and clearly knew what they were doing. Not with someone like Merlin who was as much a dumbarse as he was clueless. Someone who was so obviously a virgin, Arthur could have spotted it a mile away even if he was blind.
Merlin didn't pay Arthur any attention. The prince wasn't giving him any answers anyway. If he wanted to stand on the other side of the room staring at him, let him. Merlin gave a light bounce on the bed again. "Your bed is as bad as mine." He said. He still didn't understand how people could sleep on something so soft. It felt like a cloud was under him.
Maybe there was some kind of tactic to this, Arthur was thinking. Maybe he had to get Merlin in the mood so that he'd want to take his clothes off. Fuck, the bile rose in his throat some. Scratch that. He was not going to seduce Merlin into wanting to take his clothes off and do all the work by riding Arthur while the prince laid back with his eyes closing imagining it was a beautiful woman instead.
But that was when Merlin's words broke through the fog that he was in. Wait a minute, had he really just insulted his bed? The same bed that Arthur was supposed to be taking him on right now? How was it that Arthur was having a mental breakdown and a few simple words from Merlin was able to break through it?
And what the fuck was wrong with his bed?
The bed that he should be, right now, pushing into Merlin on.
That was the bed that Merlin was supposed to be losing his virginity on! Arthur was baffled, was his bed really not good enough for Merlin? What would Merlin constitute as 'good enough' for him to lose his virginity on?
That was when the offense hit him.
Fuck him. And not in the sex way either.
"Those are the best beds in Camelot!" Arthur exclaimed, his expression was nothing less than disbelief. It had been made especially with the prince of Camelot in mind by the best bed makers in the kingdom and delivered to Arthur upon his thirteenth birthday. And eight or so years later, it still fit like a dream. Even better now that Arthur was tall enough to fill it out better than his scrawny self at thirteen had been, before he'd filled out some.
Merlin snorted, amused by the defense Arthur was giving his bed. It was just a bed, it wasn't as if Merlin was cracking jokes about Arthur himself. But trust him, that was next on his list.
Seeing the indignation on Arthur made him crack a cheeky grin. Maybe he wasn't so bad after all. Still an arse but that didn't stop Merlin from laughing at the look in Arthur's face. "Only the best for a prince, right?" He asked teasingly.
"Then why am I not married to the best?" Arthur said bluntly. The room went deadly silent but Arthur didn't regret it for one minute. Somebody had to say it and he was more than happy to be the one to do it.
Merlin's smile vanished in an instant, looking startled by the gruff way Arthur had said it. By the suddenness and clear honest way that Arthur had said it. He looked away, feeling Arthur's eyes still on him. Feeling the little pinpricks sensation of knowing that he was being watched.
He should have known Arthur would be a jerk, even moreso after they were married than he was before it. The arse just had to open his mouth, didn't he?
"Well you're no prize yourself." Merlin forced out, clenching his jaw. Merlin clenched at the red sheets underneath him, feeling the fabric bunch up in his palms.
Arthur's eyes landed on the motion, seeing Merlin's pale skin standing out starkly against the red sheets of his bed. And the sensation of spiders crawling all over him returned full force. The reality hitting him like a sledgehammer to the gut. To do this, Arthur would have to see a whole lot of more pale skin than he wanted to see. He would have to see the contrast of pale skin all spread out against his red sheets, hear whatever sounds Merlin would make as Arthur fucked him.
Nobody but Arthur had ever laid out on his bed before. He'd never allowed anybody on his bed before. Merlin wasn't going to be the first.
Right then and there Arthur made his decision. He didn't care what the consequences or repercussions would be. He couldn't think of that right now.
He had barely been able to catch his breath this whole time, feeling as if his throat was closing up. But now, for the first time, he felt relaxed. He could feel his throat easing up as air filled his lungs. He knew he wouldn't regret this decision.
There were a lot of things Arthur's dad could force him to do. He could force him to train twenty four hours a day. He could force him to attend meetings that didn't need him. He could force him to marry. Hell, he could even force him to marry a peasant boy. But he would be damned if his father could force him to have sex with him. A marriage unconsummated made it invalid but at this moment, Arthur didn't care in the least.
He also wasn't going to waste his time on a virgin. It was more work than Arthur was willing to give. Merlin would probably be skittish, and that was even if Arthur took the time to explain. Merlin would probably be fidgeting and doing exactly the wrong thing, trying to touch things that Arthur didn't want to be touched. And then Arthur would have to take time to prepare him. It would be a long process of Arthur having to constantly talk, trying to force Merlin to relax as Arthur eased his fingers into him. And of course Merlin wouldn't listen to him, arguing and forcing this process to be drawn out far longer than it had to be.
Feeling the red sheets of the bed underneath him, Merlin pushed himself off of it, not wanting to touch anything that belonged to Arthur Fucking Pendragon. Merlin looked up to meet Arthur's eyes, storming up to him. Arthur didn't want him here and Merlin didn't want to be here.
"Tell me why I'm here." Merlin hissed, planting his hands on his hips only when he was chest to chest with the prince. "Then we can get it over with and I can lea-"
"Get out." Arthur said bluntly. His voice didn't have any emotion in it. He was quiet, deadly quiet. His eyes never wavered from Merlin's, completely serious in his demand. He wasn't going to do this. Not now, not ever, and especially never with Merlin.
Merlin's jaw snapped shut, eyes widening as a baffled expression overcame his features. "What? I thought we were supposed to be doing something!" That was the whole reason he was in here after all.
But Arthur wasn't playing games and he wasn't in the mood for this. Arthur roughly grabbed Merlin by the collar of his shirt.
"Hey! Let go!" Merlin exclaimed, trying to jerk free. Arthur ignored him, practically dragging him to the door. With one swift motion, Arthur had the door open and shoved Merlin out into the hall.
Merlin nearly stumbled over his own feet, falling forward several feet. He ended up hitting straight into the wall across from Arthur's door.
Merlin looked back to Arthur's room, confusion written all over his face, still leaning against the wall to hold his balance.
Arthur, hard faced and glaring at Merlin, slammed the door shut.
And then Merlin got mad. "Arthur!" He snapped, stomping to the door. He tried to open it but just as his hand touch the doorknob, there was the solid click of a lock sliding into place.
Merlin felt his eye twitch. Had that arse really locked him out? "Arthur Pendragon!" He snapped, banging loudly on the door with his fist. "Let me back in there!" He tried the handle anyway but no matter how hard he pushed, it wouldn't open.
"Go to bed, Merlin!" Arthur's voice snapped from inside the room. All the prince wanted to do was lay down and go to sleep just so he could pretend this never happened. Which was impossible when he had a madman banging on his door.
"You arse!" Merlin snapped, leaning heavily on the door. "And you still never told me what we were supposed to do!"
"And I'm not going to!" Arthur called back out, voice muffled through the wood.
"So you're just gonna throw me out here!" Merlin snapped. "You're not gonna tell me anything?"
There was no noise from inside after that, Arthur going silent. Merlin felt his jaw lock, leaning his head against the door to try and hear. But it was completely silent on the other side.
Merlin jerked away from the door, glaring at it as he bit the inside of his cheek. "And now you're ignoring me?" He grumbled to himself. Fine. If that was how Arthur wanted it then that was fine with Merlin. He didn't want to be in there anyway. Not with the king of all prat's.
When the banging on his door finally stopped, Arthur sighed in relief. Without changing out of his wedding clothes, Arthur threw himself onto his bed. Finally some peace and quiet.
It only lasted for barely a second though because when Arthur threw himself on the bed, it seemed to kickstart a sudden smell into the air around him. What had Morris washed his sheets with? It almost made all of his muscles relax against the bed. That was before he recognized the smell vaguely as Merlin's.
Arthur jolted off his bed, face wretched with disgust. Great, now he would need Morris to change his sheets.
But tomorrow. He was to tired to wait for the manservant to be brought to him just to change his beddings.
Fucking Merlin. He'd only been in his room for five minutes and was already leaving his mark where it didn't belong.
In the hallway, Merlin spun on his heel, intent to storm off and go to his uncle's. At least he would be better off down there then he was now.
But he'd barely taken a step when he froze. Because at the end of the hallway, standing beside the stairs that Merlin had to go down to get out was Gregory. The Knight was raising an eyebrow at Merlin but other than that, gave no indication that he'd heard anything.
Fuck, Gregory was on guard duty tonight.
And he'd witnessed Merlin being thrown out on his backside.
Feeling his face flush as if he'd just been caught doing something wrong, Merlin spun around in the other direction. He fast walked to his room, slamming and locking the door himself.
Once that was done, Merlin turned around so that his back was against it. Then he let out a heavy sigh, slumping against it and letting his head thump back on it.
Fuck, now he was stuck in here for the night. And he one hundred percent blamed Arthur for it. That stupid prick, throwing him out like he had. What had that been about?
What he wanted to do was go to his uncle's. But then he'd have to face Gregory again.
What he really wanted to do was bang on the shared door in his room just to piss Arthur off some. Let the prince get riled up some. It might do him some good. At least then he would have to face Merlin to get him to stop. At least then, Merlin could get some answers. And this time, it wouldn't be so easy to throw him out. Not if Merlin had anything to say about it.
He'd been to surprised to put up much of a fight when the prat had thrown him out so suddenly. He tried to think back but he couldn't remember anything he could have done to warrant such a reaction. What had he possibly done this time to offend Arthur's 'delicate sensibilities'.
Merlin pushed off the door, walking further into his bedroom. Well he might as well make himself comfortable if he was going to be in here for the night.
Merlin didn't get to far though because something caught his attention. His wardrobe doors were still wide opened from when Madame Teresa had been showing him his reflection just before he left for the wedding.
And he still looked the same as he always did but at the same time, completely different. He felt his face screwed up in disgust. These stupid clothes and this stupid room and this stupid kingdom and stupid Arthur with his stupid mood swings.
Merlin started stripping. At first it was just slow moments, almost robotic in nature. He started tugging at the clasp on his cape, gently toying with it while he tried to figure out how to get it undone. But his fingers were clumsy and he couldn't figure the damn thing out.
And within seconds, Merlin's frustration with it snap. With a loud growl, Merlin yanked at it harshly, almost tearing at it to get the dumb thing off. It almost felt claustrophobic, like it was choking him even though it was obviously all in his head.
He was finally about to get the cloak off by tugging it over his head and letting it fall to the floor. He didn't waste a single second, yanking off his 'cobalt' blue top. The top fell on top of the cloak at his feet. Merlin started yanking on his belt, unfastening and almost ripped it trying to kick it off. But he'd forgotten that he was still wearing his boots so his legs got tangled and down he went, hitting the floor hard on his side.
But he still didn't let that stop him. He kicked off his high class boots and was finally able to get free of his pants. Anything to get rid of the rich fabric that had been clinging to his skin. Anything to get rid of the reminder he'd just been married.
With a frustrated growl, he reached for the last thing that he had to remind him of his wedding.
And that was when he froze, his hand halfway pulling off his wedding ring. Merlin stared down at the gleaming silver ring that was a perfect fit on his finger. Crap, he couldn't get rid of that, could he?
Staring down at the ring, Merlin finally let a heavy sigh escape him before pushing it back all the way on his finger to where it was suppose to rest. Stupid wedding ring that probably cost a small fortune. He had more riches than he ever knew on his slim finger and it was an uncomfortable feeling.
But he still couldn't bring himself to take it off. As much as Arthur annoyed him and frustrated him beyond belief with what he did, he still couldn't take it off. This ring tied him to Arthur, as did the matching ring that the prince wore.
Merlin shook his head, letting out an almost sad smile at the thought of what could have been. If only Arthur was nicer, not so rude and arrogant. Maybe he wouldn't mind wearing the ring so much.
He finally drew his eyes away from the ring and his eyes met his own in his mirror. There he sat on the floor of his new bedroom, larger than his own hut back home. And he was surrounded by rich fabrics that were now his that he would never had been able to afford if he'd worked every day in his life. He wore just his underwear, looking more and more pathetic the longer he stared in the mirror.
But honestly? It was probably the most free that he had felt all day. It was just him. There was nothing that could hide that like the clothes had been doing.
Arthur had this kingdom, a crown, an army, and a million other little things that Merlin didn't know of.
And all Merlin literally had brought into their marriage was himself.
But he felt an inkling of pride at that. He didn't need all of the extra. He had only himself and that was okay with him. Even though people may argue that all of Arthur's assets belonged to him now because of their marriage, Merlin said let him keep them.
Merlin didn't want a kingdom or a crown or an army or whatever else Arthur had.
He felt better than he had all day, looking at himself in just his thin threadbare underwear. At least it wasn't fake, at least it wasn't a mask. Merlin hadn't done anything to pretend that he fit in among the nobles, he behaved as he always had. But the clothes were clearly meant for someone who belonged among the nobles.
And that most definitely wasn't Merlin...Pendragon. His name was now Merlin Pendragon.
His face screwed up at the thought. He definitely wouldn't be introducing himself with that last name anytime soon.
Merlin felt his muscles straining as he climbed to his feet. He let out a weak yawn, cracking his back as he stood. It was getting late and tonight had felt longer than it actually was.
Merlin turned his back on the wardrobe and stepped over his clothes to head to bed. He had just reached the bed. He'd even brought one knee up onto the sheets, prepared to climb in when he hesitated.
Merlin glanced back over to his clothes spread out like trash on the floor of his bedroom. He may not like them but they were still the richest clothes he'd ever owned. And they were his wedding clothes, that had to mean something, right?
With a weary sigh, Merlin climbed out of bed and scooped his clothes up off the floor. And even though he usually didn't bother, preferring to just let his clothes fall where they may as he undressed, these were different.
He folded them the best he could, going gentle and slow at several times, but they still didn't look right. They were awkward and sticking out in uneven angles that made Merlin scowl frustrated. But he didn't try anymore than that. He wasn't going to waste his time trying to get this perfect when nobody else was going to see it.
Merlin opened up his wardrobe before he snatched up his clothes from where he had laid them on the bed. He hated the delicately he had been treating them, how he'd been showing such care. Especially since Arthur hadn't even mentioned them.
He hadn't thought of it before but it was true. There was no 'you look nice' or not even a 'you look different.' Merlin rolled his eyes. He could have just worn his ordinary clothes if that was the response he was going to get. A real romantic one, that Arthur, he thought sarcastically.
Yeah, he wouldn't be getting any romance from Arthur Pendragon anytime soon. Hell, after the way Arthur had just thrown him out of his room, he wouldn't even be getting a head nod of acknowledgment as they passed each other in the hallways.
Fucking prat.
Merlin dropped the folded up clothes and boots on the bottom of the wardrobe. They almost looked kind of sad, being the only things in there. Merlin's other clothes were left in his bedroom at his uncle's.
Merlin slammed the wardrobe doors harder than he had meant to in his frustration. But it did make him feel a little better. Not much but some.
Merlin turned away from the wardrobe and started climbing into bed. He didn't go to sleep though. Merlin stood up on his knees so that he could look at the little space behind the headboard of the bed.
Merlin's lips twitched into an excited grin, feeling rejuvenated as he caught sight of the leather bound book still tucked behind it. It was to far down for him to be able to reach with just his arm. So his eyes flashed gold, a single spot of brightness in the room before they faded. And the book lifted itself out of the cubby space.
Merlin caught the book and flipped over on his bed. Propping a pillow up behind him to lay back on, Merlin started flipping through the book. It didn't matter how long of a day it had been or how exhausted he had felt mere minutes before. There was no way was he going to bed without checking out his new book.
He moved each page as if it were delicate, almost afraid that the roughest of movements may rip the aged paper. The original text of the book seemed to have been written in entirely Latin. Merlin still struggled sometimes through ordinary English since he didn't get much practice. That would probably change now that he had access to more than he'd ever had before.
Luckily though, someone over the generations had written the English version of what the Latin said in the margins of the book. Several times Merlin would stop and read the English version to know what it said and then say it in the Latin version, trying to pick out a few words.
The spells were written in Latin and who knows, maybe he would find something that didn't have English translated right next to it. It definitely wouldn't hurt to learn some Latin. Especially since the spells had to be said in Latin for them to work as there were no English translations for them.
His tongue twisted around the odd sounding words oddly as he read the Latin version back to himself, trying to connect certain words with the English words. He read quietly to himself so that even if someone had their ear pressed to the door listening in on him, they wouldn't have been able to hear a sound.
Merlin flipped to the other page and started laughing at the absurdity of this one spell in particular. It was supposed to make an inanimate object come to life. Now tell him how in any way would that be useful? Why would you make something like a painting or whatever come alive? In what situation would you actually need to use something like that?
Merlin shook his head, still chuckling about it. He couldn't see why someone would actually need to use that spell but hey, it may be a good practice spell later on. After all, how could he not try it?
Merlin flipped through a few more pages and stopped when he got on one. It was an unlocking spells, to get into locked rooms or drawers. Now that was promising. Merlin mouthed the Latin spell a few times, trying to get the words out.
His eyes drifted up to the door across from him that led to Arthur's room. And then back to his book. A few more looks were passed between each before Merlin ultimately shook his head. Nah. He couldn't use the spell to unlock Arthur's door. He would have also needed to use his magic to push out the key rack blocking it. It would be to hard to explain to Arthur how he not only managed to 'pick' his lock but was also able to push the door open wide enough for him to squeeze through.
Nobody would believe that someone as scrawny as Merlin had enough upper body strength to be able to pull that thing out of the way.
So with an almost regretful sigh, Merlin turned back to his book.
He would have loved to storm back in there, just to force some answers out of Arthur. Like why had he thrown Merlin out into the hallway as he had? Why hadn't they did what they were supposed to do? Tristian, Leon, and Arthur refused to tell him and that was frustrating to no end. What was the big deal?
Caught up in his thoughts, Merlin started twisting his wedding ring around his finger absentminded.
He was only brought out from his thoughts when he heard a creak. Merlin's head snapped up, dragging his book up to lay on his chest, bringing his arms around it as if he was trying to hide it from view. Although it was a very poor job of hiding since Merlin's arms weren't thick enough to cover it completely.
For a second, everything was quiet. And that was when Merlin saw it.
A shadow under the door passing by. Arthur was in his room walking around.
When it was clear that Arthur wasn't trying to get in, trying to drag that key rack out of the way, Merlin started to relax.
What was Arthur doing in there that was so important that he couldn't have done it after him and Merlin finished whatever ritual or whatever you wanted to call it that they were supposed to do.
Merlin rolled his eyes and closed his book. He'd been looking at it for just over an hour. Let the prat keep his secrets for now, Merlin would find out one way or the other.
Merlin slid his book under his many pillows, keeping it close at hand as he slid down further under his bed covers. He glanced over his shoulder one more time towards the door, as if to make sure that Arthur wasn't trying to break in.
But when nothing else happened and no more shadows passed by under his door, Merlin gave a huff. With a surprisingly heavy heart, he laid his head down to get some sleep.
As he started to drift off to sleep, he thought of several things all at once. And even as he thought them, he knew that they were all lies.
As if he wanted Arthur to come in here. As if he wanted Arthur to give him some kind of attention that didn't make Merlin want to hit him. As if he wanted Arthur to give him a real kiss, not like that pathetic one he'd given him at their wedding.
As if he wanted their marriage to work out...