A Marriage that Started a Legend

by IJustShowedUp

Follows canon but with my own arranged marriage spin on it. What happens when Hunith makes a mistake and is forced on the run with her infant son? What happens when Camelot knights find her twenty years later? What happens when Arthur learns he's betrothed to a peasant boy? Will Merlin be able to stand among royalty? Will these two different boys survive each other? Review!

88. Chapter 88

Six Hours and Six Minutes until their Original Execution Time:

Merlin struggled with containing his yelp after he landed harshly on the lower part of his spine. Not really on his arse, because he could definitely feel the pain radiating up his back from the base of his spine, just above where his arse begun. His hands had landed on the floor on either side of him as he attempted to catch himself after being thrown into the ground, the thick red curtains fluttering closed behind them in their grand escape. Merlin blinked several times, trying to adjust his eyes to the great encompassed darkness surrounding them both in the little alcove that was apparently hiding behind the drapes. Merlin would have never known it was there, assuming the drapes had only been hung to decorate an otherwise plain wall with the colors of the Pendragon family, the red shade they claimed as their own standing out like blood spilled to the future enemies that might want to try taking it for their own.

But for Morgana, someone who walked these very halls for more years of her life than she hadn't, the Lady would obviously know the secrets the castle held far more than Merlin did. She probably knew of no less than a dozen or more other little hidden areas just like this, spread out among the castle in their own unique ways. Briefly, Merlin wondered if Morgana had ever taken shelter in these little slots of the wall on her own. He could almost imagine a little twelve year old Morgana, curls held up with a bow as big and as blue as the dress she wore now, ducking behind one of these curtains, attempting to hide from her tutors and lessons. Recognizable as she was, Morgana would have had to sit here in the dark for hours at a time if she wanted to truly escape whatever little girl problems that plagued her mind. Merlin wondered rather or not a ten year old Arthur would have joined her during a moment like that, attempting to escape his nursemaids He would only for another few months before he was deemed too old for them, while they were left with scrambling to find the Little Prince before the King realized they had lost him.

Merlin wondered if the two spoke with the other in quiet and soft whispers, curled up against the wall and each other. Telling stories or playing child-like hand games to pass the time before they would've been forced out by grumbling stomachs and need for food and substance. It was hard to imagine the prince as anything other than the hard man he had became in today's time. It was hard to imagine the prince might have ever hidden himself away from the world to escape something as mundane as his own lessons, something people like Merlin had the desperation but not the opportunity to learn what little of the world that they could. Maybe it was his own imagination at work, and the prince had never been a child like Morgana and himself had been. It was entirely possible Arthur had just sprouted out in the world, fully grown and already prejudiced to the millions of things that weren't like him.

But even if Arthur was the man they were trying to get to at present time, he was the least of Merlin's concerns at the moment. He did find though, that he had one more problem that was more pressing than any other. And that would be Morgana's very knee, pressing sharply into his side where he had to wager was where his spleen was located. It did send burst of agitation through his side, any of his complaints muffled with Morgana's hand pressed tightly against his mouth to prevent him from the possibility of drawing attention to them. Although the heaviness of the curtains seemed to be doing a more adept job that anything Morgana could've done to shut him up.

The voices-far fainter than even a soft breeze as it caused whispers among the air as they passed by their hiding spot, unaware the one they sought for was so close at hand-did a much more adequate job at keeping him quiet. The tension striking out in the hole they claimed as their own was so thick, one could feel it with a touch of their hand. And a simple butter knife, dulled down until it could not have cut even the thing it was made too, would've been able to slice straight through the air. A slight trickling of sweat-induced by the anxiety and the anticipation one felt when they knew they had not even seconds before they would be caught-Merlin could feel was starting to work it's way down the side of his neck. Morgana herself couldn't have been stiffer than a board was, perched on top of him as she waited for the same thing he was, even though she had no reason to fear. There was only one consequence that awaited her if she had been caught aiding a fugitive of the law: and that would have been nothing more than a strict lecture from Uther and time sentenced to her room.

As it would turn out, they had nothing to fear. The men passing had seen nothing out of the sort, as proven when they would travel past the curtains without a stop in their step. Without a hitch to the conversation as they prepared to yank the curtain aside and claim their prize for their own. The brief voices only grew fainter and fainted until they had disappeared, leaving as sudden as they had came, and almost making Merlin wonder rather or not if he had imagined the whole scene. He had not, he would know logically. The increasing pressure of Morgana's knee, the hand cupping his lips starting to sweat-Merlin hadn't even known a Lady would be capable of sweating, so above them all they'd seemed to be-was good at keeping him rooted to his reality.

And like all good things, though Merlin would not have called this moment anything good, it had to come to an end. Which ensured Merlin's wiggling, bringing Morgana's attention to the fact that she still sat upon him from where she had landed once tackling him into the ground. The Lady let out this huff of air, before she finally moved her form from Merlin's space, moving only enough to sit beside him, her deep blue skirts fanning out around her, not yet moving to stand on her feet. Neither of the two of them would be leaving this alcove just yet.

With their earlier argument-spat more than a fight one would call it-forgotten in the heat of their near capture, Merlin rolled around to sit on his knees as he brought one hand up to rub at the aching of his spleen. He was pretty sure he would forever have an imprint of Morgana's knee damaging the skin of his side, forever jamming his spleen out of the rightful place it was supposed to be in. But really, what was a little pain when compared to the burns waiting for Gwen, "Morgana, what is going on out there?" Merlin finally questioned her, refusing to leave the alcove without proper answers. If these men really were looking for him, then he would've wanted to know why. Merlin couldn't be prepared for what was happening, if somebody he wanted to trust enough he would include them in the eye of his mind as a member of his false council, was not going to explain the truth to him without any mincing of their words, then how could he trust her to see this mission through to the end?

Merlin needed to know right then and there if he'd be able to trust Morgana. And know rather or not she was the type to leave once things got dicey. If she was, then it was best for him to leave her now and continue on his own. He wouldn't blame her, Merlin wouldn't be here himself if he could change things. But once they got down to the caves, then Morgana couldn't change her mind halfway. There would be nowhere for her to go afterwards if she'd want to return to the safety of her chambers.

Luckily for Merlin though, Morgana would never be the type to mince or words. Nor would she hide from him the truth of what she'd seen, "When I left and went out to wait for you," the lady started with her long explanation, casting uncertain glances at the curtains as if she still feared they'd get caught anyways, the knights somehow returning for them and their flesh. Which was why she kept her voice low, not trusting the curtains to be thick enough to keep their voices from being heard of anymore of the knights passed them by. "I thought I had heard something down the way. And God, did I. I saw the knights, three of them to be precise. I investigated and heard what they were saying, awful things for sure. I would have had them hanged if it was in my power. But they were talking…about you…"

Merlin just nodded his head, not surprised nearly as much as he would have been before this month or so. The knights gossiped more than old married couples did, and Merlin was usually their topic of choice. The one and only thing Merlin felt was the embarrassment of Morgana hearing all the things they thought of him. He could only imagine how graphic they would have spoken, not knowing that they were in the company of a Lady. Even knights, as crude as they were, wouldn't dare to speak the awfulness they often spewed at him on the daily, in front of somebody who had Class.

Morgana didn't show surprise by Merlin's lack of surprise. By now, it seemed to have became one of the most well known 'opened secrets' roaming around the castle: how detestable Merlin was with all matters of the court. At this point, Merlin would be ready to just say 'fuck it' and given them all the kind of show they wanted. If they wanted to have more gossip fodder over how incompetent he was really, he would just have to show them. First step, not allowing their bloodlust to be sated by Gwen's premature death.

"I wanted to confront them, and demand to know what they thought speaking of their consort with such disrespect so openly." Morgana continued on explaining her side of what happened. She knew already there was an unpopular opinion of Merlin going around, had heard some of the things being said. But what that group of knights had said had truly been vile, and people she would need to be sure to keep a heavy eye on for it they choose to act on such awful impulses. Uther would have had their heads if the topic had been on himself, or his ward, or his heir. But the kingdom's consort would have been left to deal with it on his own, with the hopes he would succumb and be rid of a menace to their sorcery. Or so Uther would say should the lady claim the injustice of it all, it wasn't as if the consort had even asked to be here, thrown right to the wolves as they picked him over like leftover at dinner time. Morgana continued talking, regret in her voice over not being allowed to rip the men a new one, "But I had to keep myself hidden. You were coming at any moment, and I needed to have the chance to warn you before you stumbled into them yourself and discovered what their plans had been the hard way. They meant to harm you, with their jesting, how they thought it was funny, but it makes me fear for where our kingdom is going if those are the men meant to protect us. But, these men were going to drag you to your doom, in the name of the king."

"The King wants me captured? But wh-" that was when Merlin cut himself off, the truth hitting him in the same way a bolt of lightning would have struck him dead from the sky. He felt like a right idiot, the truly stupid son of a fool for not seeing what was right in front of him this whole time. His deal. That deal he had made with Uther, sworn in front of the most powerful men in the entire kingdom. The Old King himself had promised Merlin twelve hours to discover the secret curse cast upon their land and provide evidence Gwen had no involvement in the evil-doing's of the witch. But Uther had only gave him six, breaking the deal before Merlin would get a chance to prove his testimony. Somehow, Merlin had been thinking, when the hour struck the mark of twelve, he would still be able to storm into the king's chambers and present the beast's head to him after it was slayed, struck down for the safety and protection of the kingdom. He hadn't taken a minute to consider, with Gwen's execution being moved, Merlin's own would be as well. There was only one word to sum up what was happening to them, "…Shit."

Morgana didn't wring his neck when the suddenly foul language emerged from his lips. She nodded solemnly ion agreement with her word, reaching up a hand to tug helplessly at the strings holding the bodice of her dress together, "Admirable as it was, you made a deal with the king. And now he's here to collect." Though the air was stale inside of the alcove, no fresh air being able to penetrate the thickness of the curtains, her voice carried over to him like it would in the breeze, caressing slowly on his skin as she spoke nothing but the truth. King Uther was demanding his pound of flesh to sit on the stake, and he would have it before the sun was to rise on the next day.

Merlin's face pinched in response, glowering with a dark resolution at the ground. What a disgusting and vile, slimy like a toad, little man the great King of Camelot turned out to be. Willing to go back on a deal he made to a boy not hours afterwards, but willing to enforce a deal he made with the parents of the same deal twenty years earlier? Merlin was only able to figure the king had planned this from the very beginning. He probably had no intentions of keeping their deal, even from the very second the agreement had left his lips. Why keep around a consort he didn't want in his kingdom, when he found an easier way to quietly dispose of him. The powerful king…Merlin should have known from the start that the king would not allow himself to lose so publicly. It would be best to have them both be burned before Merlin had any real chance to strike down the beast.

Merlin would have gone to the stake himself, if he had lost the deal fair and square. If only to stop his friend from dying alone. But to know the king was trying to swindle him, trying to cut off their deal to make it look as if Merlin had failed once again. The King may not believe he had any real possibility of success, but he wasn't taking any chances on the off chance Merlin might pull off a miracle. Did you know what this meant? To Merlin…it meant a war had just started between him and the king. And it was a war he had every intention of winning-even if he had yet to win any fight he'd been in since his arrival in this city. Gwen's life hung in the balance of the war, and the victor would decide what was done with her.

"And the worse part," Morgana's voice broken past the turmoil of his thoughts, as she cast a dark look at the curtains. As if they had somehow offended her on a personal level, so badly that the lady was more than happy to see them lit with the flames of hellfire left behind in her wake. If only such a thing was possible, for a normal girl like her to do. Said woman turned back to Merlin, painted lips turned in disdain as she regaled him with what the worse part of it all apparently was. "Is that we are stuck inside of this alcove for only god knows how long." Before she returned back to glowering at the cloth hiding them from view, keeping them safe for the time being as they crouched on the floor in front of it, a false imitation of what praying to a god who was standing right in front of them might look like.

Merlin whipped his head around to look through the darkness at the Lady, her dark hair blending to make it look as if her head was floating in mid-air instead of being attached to her shoulders, "What are you talking about 'we're stuck'. Stuck inside of what!" Merlin's eyes darted up to the top, trying to scan his eyes along the top of the curtain while he tried to find what she meant. The curtains weren't exactly pinned down, preventing them from trying to leave without ripping the whole thing apart with their escape. Straining his ears, he couldn't hear a sound to indicate more knights had stationed their group outside of the curtains, unaware they were preventing Merlin and Morgana from being able to continue with their mission.

"Not all prisons are made out of iron shackles, as I am sure you are quite aware of already." Morgana spoke to him in riddles, having followed his gaze up towards the rungs keeping the curtain hanging, constantly keeping Merlin on his toes as he tried to decipher what she was going on about. Merlin watched as Morgana reached out to the curtain to tug it open on the side, just a little whole within its fabric-Merlin had to nearly scrunch on top of the lady to peek through the hole itself. Where Merlin could only see half of what Morgana was talking about.

"That-that's Derrick!" Merlin pointed out. The little alcove they were in was situated directly between the hall and the opened area they had been going to before their brief argument. Knight Derrick had found himself stationed as a new temporary guard on duty while Gregory was out of commission, and was now guarding over the entrance to the Royal Suites. Derrick was the first Knight Merlin had met when entering the kingdom, had winked at him in a playful manner when Merlin had gotten married off to a barbarian. He'd even allowed Merlin what was his rightful right to enter during the meeting of the council! He was an alright guy in Merlin's books. But that didn't explain Morgana's reaction to seeing his presence. "This is a good thing, isn't it? With Derrick, he'll just let us right in. We won't have to do anything extra to try and sneak inside those chambers…"

He could only imagine how difficult it would have been for them to sneak past Markus or somebody else…

"Sadly," Morgana said, snapping the curtains back closed before their voices could carry out and get Derrick's attention in the worse ways. "The age of gallantry seems to be dead. I look around and I do not see one brave man. Only small ones, ones so weak minded, their bodies aren't even big enough to fill out their armors. Not one of them is going to stand up for what is right, and that includes Knight Derrick." She spoke with certainty in her voice and sounded more sure than anything. As friendly with Knight Derrick as he was-or so friendly, Merlin had made note of him being one of the few knights out there that didn't try to jump him in this hostile life he was living in-he would not help them.

Merlin's frown deepened as he tried to explain his side of things, "But how do you not know he won't help us? Derrick can be useful, maybe he can call for a disturbance or do something big to drag the attention of the other knights while you, me, and Arthur sneak off to the caves…" although Morgana wasn't wrong with what she had said either. Merlin had seen many knights since his arrival, and while he had met very few that were on the friendly side of things, he hadn't met anybody that embodied a knight as they should. Somebody noble, who had to know their honor and doing what was right was far more important than trying to beat some other knight and raise your status up in the ranks of the knighthood. Not even the Great Arthur Pendragon, who was said to have a reputation far greater then even the gods, were most clearly and grossly over exaggerated. For the mortal man was nothing but that: a mortal man. And an awful and terrible one at that.

Morgana shook her head in her refusal to believe the knight could be any help to them, "Poor Merlin believe me when I tell you this, Derrick will not be a friend to us. He might be friendly, he might even be willing to buy us some time, but not even he is going to lie for us. What do think will happen once he sees you. He will have no choice if he wishes to keep his position in the court. The second he sees your arrival, he will raise the alarms and keep you there until others have arrived. Do you see, this is our dilemma, for you will just end up exactly where we are trying to escape. Kneeling at the king's feet as they put the final preparations stationed on the pyre." And Morgana shook her head wearily. She'd feared she was already going to lose one friend in this darkened night, but to lose a second-one that was even newer and fresher and didn't deserve to have any of this happening to him-it almost felt as if it was unimaginable.

Merlin felt the urge to protest and defend what he hoped was a semi-friend to him, but he did not try no matter how much he wanted too. There was no time for stupid mistakes, getting stuck behind the curtain may have already cost them Gwen and he getting Derrick involved might cost them himself before he was ready. Derrick might be friendly, but like Morgana had said…he was one of the knights of Camelot, he would not risk his own lot in life to help the unwanted consort. Merlin turned around to the lady, "Then why don't you just go ahead to get Arthur?" He asked the dark haired maiden, as he got his thoughts in order, mind working to form a new plan with these new circumstances that had been presented to him. "Derrick doesn't ever have to see me, but he won't question you returning to your rooms. I will just wait here until you return on the stairs, and we can all leave for the caves. And we won't get caught."

Morgana didn't entertain the thought for even one second, and Merlin watched as the lady eased her backside onto the cold stone floor, as if she would be preparing herself to get comfortable for a long duration, rather than raising to her feet to do what Merlin had suggestion, "It will not work." Morgana said plainly, rearranging her skirts so they fell in a way that covered up her legs modestly. "What do we do once we have Arthur? Do he and I return to the caves on our own, when you are the only one who has actually seen the beast and knows what we are looking for or where we're supposed to be at. As it turns out, we will need you there to be our guide through this nightmare. And yet, you cannot leave this place without being seen by Derrick. Its only a miracle he was distracted by that group of knights that passed by earlier, and did not see us as we fell through…" but Morgana was regretting pushing them in here at the moment, though her face showed no sign of it. She knew, during the moment, she had no choice. There were no other doorways or places to hide and the knights were rounding the corner. It was a miracle this hole was even stationed here, or that they would be near it when they needed a place to hide the most.

"So what do we do?" Merlin demanded hotly as he ignored the tightness in his chest. Morgana spoke and said they 'needed him'. Merlin had never once been needed for anything in his life, especially not for something as important as this. Sure, he would be 'needed' to add another pair of hands working on the field and the crops. He was 'needed' to not be an embarrassment in Arthur just by breathing in his direction. Not even when Merlin saved the prince's life twice over, had he been 'needed' for it. Since nobody knew it was him. But this time, it was clear Morgana 'needed him' even if this time, he didn't know how to help if he was truly stuck behind this curtain. "Do we just sit here and wait until they get tired of looking for me? And decide to go ahead and have Gwen burned?"

The only good thing it seemed, about having the knights looking for him, was how he doubted even the king would go ahead with Gwen's burning. Not when he wanted to see Merlin on the pyre just as badly. They would wait until he was in their grasp before hurting her…

"Don't be ridiculous," Morgana spoke sternly, her dark eyes resting firmly on Merlin's form inside the dark area, before confirming exactly what he had already considered. "You being hidden is a stroke of luck on our part. Gwen shall not die before you have been brought to the king. He will want to be able to hear from your own lips, and force you to admit in front of the court that you have nothing to prove Gwen's innocence. And they won't go off to the caves, Uther is stubborn and he will not listen to a word you say in your defense. Believing you are doing nothing but trying to gain time to figure out how to save your own skin. So no, our one and only chance is to stay put, and hope Derrick has to leave for some unimaginable reason, leaving me to get Arthur while you can get a head start on the caves and wait for us there."

Merlin didn't look pleased with this plan, wanting to get out there and actually do something rather than sitting around and waiting. But Morgana had already made herself comfortable, and it looked as if she wasn't getting up until Derrick had truly left his post. Merlin grumbled underneath his own breath in agitation, before settling himself down next to her. He didn't like it one bit, but Morgana was right. Him getting caught now wouldn't help them. It might be slow going, but they needed to get an actual plan that would work. He needed to be smart about this instead of doing this running off half-cocked thing he usually did. But while the minutes passed in silence, and Merlin's leg started behaving as if it had a mind of his own-bouncing up and down to get some of his excess energy out of himself, although he was probably only making things worse-he couldn't take it anymore, before he was blurring out the thing that's been resting in the back of his mind this whole time.

"I'm sorry!"

Morgana whipped her had around and looked at him, obviously confused since she was too busy with planning their escape rather than Merlin and their earlier fight. Merlin winced and hunched over so his shoulders were resting near his large ears in his misery. Earlier, at one point during their talking, Morgana had told Merlin how his actions betrayed him as admirably. But Merlin could only feel like he was less than anything admirable. Who, in all the millions of people in the world, would find a thing 'admirable' about somebody who was becoming more and more of a mess each day. Even when he tried to fight it, or act as if it didn't bother him, or busied himself with something like this…he knew he was sinking further and further. And could only wonder how much deeper he could fall before he knew something would have to give…

"I'm sorry I yelled at you about my ongoing issues with Arthur." He explained, feeling as if he may as well go through with this considering there wasn't much else to be done in the moment. And he was not going to sit there for any unknown amount of time with this weighing on the back of his mind. It was shameful of him…to all but attack her like her had. Sure, Merlin was angry and pissed about his own lot in life, and wanted to take it out on against the first person who confronted him about it. But Morgana hadn't deserved his rage, "I should not have went at you like that. It's not your fault I got married off to a…to a…" he didn't even have the right word for what to call Arthur in this moment.

"To a little bitch?" Morgana filled in for him, while she smirked at the astonished way Merlin looked at her. She might be a lady, but she wasn't what she often portrayed herself as. Morgana had some bite in the way of harsh words and even a sharper tongue, to go along with her claws. She supposed she could have done better to be on Arthur's side of things considering they had grown up together, tried to explain to Merlin why he was being so very difficult about all of this. How nobody would ever be able to understand-least of all her-what either of them were going through. On one hand was the political side of things: just how unpresidential the marriage was, how off putting it was since in all of history, a peasant had never been married into the Royal family. Not when they were the same gender so that itself was completely unheard of, but she's sure Merlin had heard all of that before and there was no point in bringing it up again. And on top of that was the other hand, the more emotional one where she tried excusing Arthur by explaining how awful all of this was to him. And it wasn't because of anything Merlin had done, she knew Arthur was bound to behave just as awful to any other man he had been forced to marry. But again, Morgana was sure Merlin already knew all of this, so there would be no point in her rehashing old topics. The things she thought over didn't excuse Arthur for what he had been doing to Merlin. Arthur was not a victim as he often portrayed himself as.

Merlin gaped at her with surprise, before he was grinning and shaking his head, "I really am a bad influence around here, aren't I?" It felt really wrong for him to be smiling right now. Considering Gwen could have been being picked up at any moment to attend her own execution. Unless they decided to wait to find him before she was collected from the cells, if only so the two of them could go out in one fiery ball of explosion together. A double done burning for the price of one, so to speak. But they were stuck here, and it felt almost 'good' to have a single moment where he wasn't constantly in one mood after the other, forcing himself to feel as if he was walking on a tightrope and everybody else around him was just waiting for him to flip off and hit the ground.

Morgana brushed back her braid with a casual twist of her hand, and then she was looking away with an air of casually done indifference about her, knowing, "Don't beat yourself up over it. There are some times when a girl is just tired of behaving as if she's nothing more than a lady, you know." Okay, the consort didn't really 'know' but he figured this was more of a rhetorical question and nodded his head along with her. Morgana didn't understand his problems with his marriage and he wouldn't be able to understand her problems about being one of the most important ladies in the kingdom. But it felt as if they were a good match, somebody who the other could vent their problems out with while they waited to get out of this hole. "Besides, I will admit I am not entirely without fault in this." Before she waited for Merlin to make the connection with her words.

And make the connection he did, Merlin's jaw was dropping only seconds later, "You…little…shit.." he knew talking to the lady like that was grounds for being hung. But what were they going to do, throw a torch on his half of the pyre twice as he cursed all of them out…maybe he should freak them out as one last 'fuck you' by spitting out words that were utter nonsense to make them think he had cursed them all. And how long it would take them to realize nothing had happened afterwards. But all jokes aside, it was pretty hard not to curse as he finally realized Morgana had done all of this on purpose. She had pushed him, and pushed him on the matter until something in him finally snapped and he started to yell. Forgetting for that one brief moment that they were supposed to be on the run from the law, and quiet was the only way they'd be escaping.

"It was sloppy of me, especially during our time of crisis here, but I won't apologize either." The lady said solidly, spoken like a true queen. Somebody who made their decisions and would stand with it, even if everybody else told her she was wrong to do it. Merlin raging at her hadn't been a side she'd seen of him before, but she figured it was a good thing to allow him to get it all out. It couldn't have been healthy to keep all that pent up rage bottled inside of him. It was better for it to burst now, in a semi-contained manner, than having it burst with a more public setting. Morgana gave Merlin a side eye as she tugged her legs up to her chest, skirts moving underneath her as she did, "You do feel as if your better, don't you?"

Merlin opened his mouth to argue 'no', he still was not any better than he was. He was still stuck in a loveless marriage, forced to endure ridicule and/or straight up assaults from the people who swore to protect his so called new 'family'. He was also still stuck in this hole, forced to endure another talk of what's been going on with him, and…and…Merlin's jaw clicked shut with an audible clink of teeth. For as strange as it was, he did feel…lighter? Was that the word he would use for this feeling. Yes, he was thinking he was 'lighter' than he had been before. Don't get him wrong, Merlin was pissed about his lot in life, and he was verging on depression more often than he was not. But his chest didn't feel as if he had this large gaping hole in the center of his heart, slowly crumbling away as if it was nothing more than dust, with each and every insult casted his way from the lips of the prince he was wedded too.

"And while I have you down here and unable, with no chance of escape, there is something I would like to ask of you." Morgana continued to speak as she snuck a peek out of the curtains to make sure Derrick was still guarding the stairs. Anymore of their conversation could wait until Gwen was done being rescued, but there was also no point in just sitting here in silence while Derrick still stood with his watching. Merlin could feel his heart stutter to a stop, not sure if he wouldn't rather risking being sent to the hangman's noose on Knight Derrick's very own command, as he watched her letting the edge of the curtain flutter shut. Merlin would later come to realize, having deep and meaningful talks with Morgana would never end well with him. Or it would never end without him confessing to what he most decidedly did not want to confess too. "I will tell you first, Arthur paid me a visit before all of this nastiness with Gwen started. I think you would have been quite amused if you had saw him. He'd been agitated by your moving out, seems to have thought I had something to do with it?" She lifted an eyebrow up at him, while awaiting his answer.

Merlin slumped back further against the wall, and crossed his arms across his chest so he had his hands buried in his armpits, because of course his conversations would revolve around Arthur. It was always that way, was it not? Nobody wanted any conversation with him unless it was to ask how he was doing or what Arthur had done to his during this last time around, "I'm sorry you had to go and get dragged into that. I can only imagine what my 'husband' behaved like, he wasn't entirely pleased when he left my uncle's that day…" Merlin may just have felt more light hearted in a while, but as the consort realized, only the mention of Arthur would seem to be enough to bring him back down. Even more-so as he remembered what else happened on that day: the death of his poor chest, his little piece of Ealdor…crushed beneath the feet of such a man who didn't know what it was like to spend the last bit of gold he had on possessions he was not going to be able to keep. Merlin didn't think he would ever be able to get over that loss, bitter still and would be to the end of time over it. Pathetic in a way, considering it was nothing more than a little batch of material goods. But it was 'his goods and that had made all the difference.

"No, I don't suppose he was. Nearly forming at the mouth he was," she grumbled, leaning heavily into Merlin's side, lifting a hand up to finger around the end of her braid, voice hushed and sounding like it was distant in the darkness of the alcove. The lady would almost be considered a ghost, nothing that was anything more than a disembodied voice that came from the darkness, the warmth tightly snug against his side the other thing to let Merlin know Morgana really 'wasn't' just a disembodied voice in the dark, conjured by his own imagination so he wouldn't feel so alone. "But if one does want me to be totally honest, I will like to admire how bold it was, making the move out like you did."

And, Morgana thought within the confines and the privacy of her own mind, the horrified look on the prince's face the day the people found out Merlin had been the one to leave 'him', would be quite a sight to behold. She only hoped she was there to see his initial reaction because make no mistake, a secret as big as this wouldn't last long within this type of city. She gave the people at least a week after this sickness, before some observant soul noted Merlin's rare presence inside of the main castle.

Merlin looked quite startled with this praise when all he had done was gotten out when he had seen his first opportunity. It wasn't bold at all, he rather thought of it as nothing more than an agitated boy running before he could be stopped. Because the truth was, he had nothing holding him there, and had no plans to stay and waste away as the world passed by his window, "I don't think I would have called it bold." He said, as he squinted in the dark to make out the milky white of the smooth skin of her face. "Odd, might have been a better word for my heat of the motion decision. Or maybe weird is a good word for it. Or if you want to get even more complicated, you can just call it stupid, and just a reaction in my fit of anger. It's…it's not exactly one thing I would choose to write home about…"

If Merlin would even be allowed to write home, he mused over quietly to himself. Merlin would love to write home to his mother, to wait with great eager anticipation for her flowery script to appear on the table at Gaius, waiting for him to read it. But he no idea how he was to send a letter to her, let along if it would even go through. With his every move on the watch-somehow evading his magical secret in all those watchful eyes-whose to say his own Mail wouldn't be monitored or even read before it had gotten back to him. Merlin only wished he had left Arthur's 'generous accommodations for his life in the city' because it was the best thing for him to do for himself. Rather than leaving when he was in an emotional fit of rage, something Arthur could use against him, claiming he had done it since he was not able to control his 'childish tantrum' or his 'mental affliction' or whatever it was Arthur would think he had the next time they saw the other.

"Please tell me you aren't gonna give in and move back into the Royal suites?" Morgana exclaimed in which she thrusted herself around to look at him better, squinting in the dark the same as he was having to do. "Because don't get me wrong, we'd love to have you back. It can be quite suffocating when there's only Arthur and Uther to talk with in the night. And Arthur would most definitely like to have your return if only so he knows where you've gone off too. But Merlin," she reached out to cup the other boy's shoulder in her soft ladylike hand. "Don't tell me your gonna give in so easily. I would think it would be better to wait, I mean, do you not want to see Arthur on his knees after all of this is over with? Once the sickness has been cleared of anymore casualties, and there are no more or any distractions in the way, I'm sure the next thing the prince will do is try convincing you to return where you belong."

Merlin snorted at the idea of belonging 'anywhere' that had the Pendragon name attached to it. That was like saying a monster like him, whose magic was seen as a gift from the devil himself, would've found belonging in a church. Or during mass. Or some other religion worshipping ceremony. "Trust me Morgana," he said dryly, curling his legs tightly beneath him, feeling the anxious thrum going right down his body the longer they had to wait for that Derrick to get a move on and leave already. "If my 'husband'-" he continued in saying this particular word as a means of separating himself, reminding himself just how much he had came to detest the prince in such a short amount of time. Because no real husband would treat Merlin as Arthur had, he refused to believe such horrific behavior was the norm for married couples. And even if it was, he refused to accept it in his own marriage. He may not be able to stop it, but Merlin wouldn't make it easy for Arthur to torment him by being inside the very next room. "Wanted my return, he wouldn't have left me there. I would have been dragged to my suite if he truly wanted. So I'm sure Arthur will be enjoying his life now that I'm not constantly in his sight. And once this is over, and I can get rid of Gregory-" Merlin stopped just long enough for him to breathe in a deep inhale of the stale air, though it filled his lungs up so sweetly. "I can maybe get a taste of my freedom and privacy back."

That sounded almost like a pipe dream to Merlin, as he shared what he wanted to do once this was all over and they could move on, as if there wasn't every possibility in the world they might not live as dawn approached. But a boy such as him, he who could not do much of anything, was able to dream without being stopped. But Merlin had a feeling of his dreams…they would not come to pass. It would only be so long, where he could sit under a tree in the shade somewhere and get lost in one of Gaius many books without the feel of harsh eyes staring him down and waiting for him to somehow screw up even reading. How much peace would he get to himself before Arthur came trampling through the overgrowth of grass, demanding his attentions and forcing Merlin to deal with whatever tantrum of his he had apparently caused him this week…he sighed greatly, wondering if it really was just one pipe dream. After all, it didn't seem as if they were ever going to get out of this alcove.

Morgana nodded her head, and then she reached out to nudge him in the ribs with her sharp, pointy elbow, "I'll be sure to let Arthur knows he needs to step up his game if he wishes to have you coming back, without making petty demands of you. I do love seeing him as he runs through the castle as he attempts to track you down. Not much seems to get underneath Arthur's skin, but I've also not seen him drop everything and run when you have gotten concerned…" still remembering the day he and her had been talking before the farmer had interrupted them. Arthur had ran off in mid-stride and mid-conversation, not bothering to explain to Morgana what was going on. One may've thought the hounds of hell were lapping at his ankles from the way he ran.

Merlin shook his head, knowing this was just one of Morgana's jokes as she tried to be funny. Even if it had fallen flat long before the apparent punch line of it. "Don't bother on my account." He told as he knew, Arthur would only track him down once his presence as Consort was needed. Arthur had no 'game' to step up. As far as Merlin would find him concerned, Arthur wasn't even a piece on top of the board. Hell, maybe he was nothing more on the board than the enemy, where Merlin needed to desperately move his own pieces around to keep himself safe so Arthur wouldn't be able to break in through his defenses. "Did you know Arthur didn't even realize I was gone? I could have walked right on out of the city, and how long would it have take for him to come after me? Days, weeks…if he had not been searching the kingdom for the real witch then he never would've known I was gone at all."

Maybe, Merlin thought grudgingly, that had been the reason he hadn't just tried to straight up leave the kingdom the day he had packed his belonging and left. He could try to run, try to find freedom or escape this cursed like of his, but he was still their prisoner. Once he was needed, however long until that would take, they would have discovered he'd gone. And they would come for him. And once he was found, he would end up right back from that one place he'd escaped from. Only watched more than he had been before, until he had no choice to take his own life in his attempt to escape the eyes of those who wanted him dead in the first place. It was complicated for sure…and Arthur would most likely be the one leading the charge. Arthur made sure to let Merlin know he wasn't wanted, but the prince would refuse to let him leave too.

Morgana showed no judgement on his face while she allowed Merlin to share some things that had been bothering him for so long, allowing him with having his turn to talk for once, without the yelling he had been doing at her earlier. "And you wanted to see how long it would take him to notice you're absent." Which wasn't a bad plan, there were just some people who would want to know they were being noticed. And not noticed in the bad light the consort always seemed to be cast in. But…it was Arthur. Merlin could have been gone for weeks at a time before Arthur noticed, and Arthur would've only noticed when he realized things had gotten a bit too quiet around here. One thing about Merlin, the castle had really been spiced up since he had arrived.

Merlin brought a hand up and ran his fingers along the top of his hair, groaning as he tugged some of the strands and felt the light bursts of a briefly felt pain. The pain wasn't awful though, he was almost relishing in it, wanting to yank harder or harshly try to dig his nails into his scape. Feeling the pain was far better than feeling the hurt, the pain he could control. The hurt was what was being done to him constantly, "That makes me sound pathetic, does it not?" Merlin asked Morgana in response to what she had said earlier. He wanted to go back in time to knock some sense into his past self-even if this was only a week ago-just to let Past Merlin know Past Arthur wasn't gonna show up for him. He had been so stupidly naive during that period, and he felt as if he had grown a lot in just the last days or so since that incident. Nowadays, Merlin had no expectations of Arthur, wasn't expecting him to show up and wasn't expecting him to help without one hell of a fight. He was just…over it, and Merlin was still surprised he had even bothered to come this far with Morgana.

He would have gone to the caves on his own if she hadn't been so convinced she could get Arthur to come along with them. Merlin fucking-kill him now Pendragon-was no dimwit. dimwit. He was not going to be lost in an endless cycle where people still thought he was pathetically pining over Arthur. He was just over him, which he hoped he had made very clear when he'd left him last.

Morgana took this second to cast another look out of the curtains, tugging it open just far enough to get another look towards the stairs. And since she allowed the curtains to flutter back shut into their rightful place, Merlin could only assume this had to mean Derrick was still standing watch. "I don't think your pathetic at all, there's nothing wrong in wishing for a different life than the hand you have been given." And from the way Morgana's had this wistful tone in her voice, it ended up giving Merlin the impression…maybe they weren't so different in this regard. The Peasant Consort and a pseudo Princess, thrusted into roles they weren't born to take on. Forced into the spotlight as they took on the stress, and the prestige, through the different circumstances that led them to being here in this moment. Connecting on a new level they hadn't originally. "But if you really want to know who is pathetic around here," Morgana continued to say as she reached up and flung a black strand of hair out of her eyes with a huff. "It's when a woman of high standards is upset their Royal Consort takes charge and dismisses her presence. One would be grateful she wasn't arrested instead of just told to leave."

And Merlin was pretty sure he had just dropped to the ground, rolled over like a dead fish, and lost all and any confection to his brain by what Morgana had suddenly added to their conversation. "You…" he stuttered in disbelief, the memories flooding in him because there was only one thing in the world Morgana could have been talking about. Another something or other he would be content to never waste his time, breath, or energy discussing since it was what his was. Nothing less than a possible affair in the making, and while Merlin inadvertently stopped it this time by the purest accident of him walking in on them, he wasn't going to waste his time stalking Arthur. If he…if he wanted someone who had no shame and threw themselves at men who were already married…Merlin would be happy to stay as far away from it as he could get. "How'd you even know about that! It didn't happen all that long ago!"

Make no mistake, Merlin didn't give a flying fuck what it was Arthur decided to do in his spare time with that…with that…disgusting creature. But he felt this close to having a meltdown on his own for this. Completely freaking out, Merlin was positive his time in the city was about to get much worse around here. The way those people-when he had gone shopping in the lower town just before he'd decided to go job hunting, and was just trying to enjoy his first real outing out of his room-acted as if it was somehow his fault Arthur had ran off with the first girl to open her arms and abandoning him at his own celebration party…that moment had left speculation and only petty rumors to be passed to people needing something new to fill up their own otherwise dull lives. But Merlin was pretty sure the news had been confirmed in their minds…Arthur was cheating on him. Good gods, could this have gone any worse! Arthur went on and on about how Merlin was an embarrassment every second of the day, but did he ever stop to think of how awful and embarrassing his own actions were?

"Well, there are some ladies still in the castle who got stuck on this side of the wall when everything started shutting down. They have taken shelter in one of the guest wings, and I did my diligence by checking on their comfort briefly." Morgana spoke, as she started up her long winded explanation for how she knew of one of those most humiliating or disgusting moment's of Merlin's life. "I heard from Lady Beth, who heard from Lady Larissa, who had stopped and visited with Clarissa herself. And by her own lips, Clarissa has been running her trap to anybody who will listen."

Merlin was already dreading what could be being said, and he clenched harshly at his knees while he forced himself to listen closely, the fabric of his pants bunching up in his fists. Merlin hadn't really given much thought to what people would say to him before, but gone were the days where he was able to dismiss all that. He had bigger problems to worry about than somebody else calling him 'the weird kid' or 'the bastard child'. Because this was not a full childhood insults made against someone who was different. This was an entire city filled to the brim with people waiting-and wanting-to see him fail whatever expectations they heaped onto him. This was 'Arthur', the bloody basted who he wished would just jump in a well somewhere and never emerge to bother him another day, fueling the ever spinning rumor mill of Camelot City. And taking pleasure in making Merlin a laughing stock to everybody, isolating him far more than he had ever been before. Merlin knows he'd already told Arthur he didn't care about him anymore, wasn't going to waste his time coming to him in an hour of need-which was why he was leaving all of this up to Morgana-but Merlin, no matter how much he wanted to scream at him over whatever his new 'girlfriend' was saying, would remain strong. He would not return to Arthur Bloody Pendragon, not even to yell at him for his 'girlfriend' trying to ruin his life.

"Apparently," Morgana continued on with her story as she ignored the way Merlin's head spun, unable to recognize any of the names she had spoken of with such familiarity. "Clarissa is really upset with you, and is telling everybody she was having this really nice talk with Arthur, trying to help him ease his burden since he was really stressed. But that's when you saw them and flew into a jealous rage at her. I mean, the way she's talking, its like she's just trying to get ahead of things by making you sound as if you're a crazy person." Morgana made a big show about rolling her eyes-something Merlin was barely able to detect in the dark-as if to indicate how she hadn't believed one word Clarissa must have been going on about. While nice to know the Lady Morgana wasn't one to fall for prey to nicely spun words, Merlin still felt his lip curl up bitterly.

"She's a lying, conniving…" Merlin started hissing under his breath, gritting his teeth so hard he was able to feel a headache about to start forming as he clenched his hands wildly in the air as if he was wanting to strangle somebody. More like strangle the pompous prince that had brought Clarissa into his life. Clarissa didn't seem like she would be that big of an issue, when compared to other problems he was having, but Merlin knew he would have to deal with her after all this was over at some point in the future. Merlin would be the very last person to say he knew anything about women, but he had a feeling Clarissa wasn't the type to disappear just because he hated her and everything she was. His own husband wouldn't even given him one chance to be friends, but he would suck faces with…"I bet she didn't bother mentioning when I found her, it was to her trying to stick her hand down the front of Arthur's pants in the middle of his Suite. So she wasn't lying, she was definitely trying to 'ease his burden', but she was lying too because it was that prat who told her she needed to leave. Wanted to do damage control with me I guess, as if I would believe anything he had to tell me."

Morgana had given an audible gasp when he was speaking of Clarissa's hand going for the front of Arthur's pants-and though he hated anything that had to do with Arthur, something buried inside of him 'ached' at knowing the prince would run off at the first moment to do something like…that. Just because he and Arthur couldn't…do…anything, did not mean Arthur had to treat him like he was the enemy. But too much time had passed, too much of him ached because of Arthur, and really didn't want to fall back into the pity party he usually fell into when Arthur was concerned. For Merlin trying to put some distance, being done with Arthur for good to the point where he didn't care what the prince did with his life-if only it wouldn't effect his own as well-it still ached when he thought of what he was stuck with. The only good thing about this continued conversation, was at least Merlin knew now there wasn't some kind of nobility version of a bulletin board stuck up somewhere, spreading all of the latest gossip and news flooding around the castle this day. No, it was just Clarissa running her big mouth and making an arse out of herself by doing it.

"Clarissa obviously must have forgotten to speak of that little detail." Morgana said stiffly, making it quite clear what she thought of Clarissa reworking the story to cast herself in the better light. It was there in the pinched look on her face, saying but not speaking of how absolutely disgusted she was with Clarissa's actions. At least Merlin knew he'd not been over exaggerating by being pissed off at Arthur. The way he had tried to gaslight him, make it seem as if Merlin was somehow the one at fault for his own awful actions. Arthur was lucky Merlin hadn't decided to use his magic to throw open his windows and have the prince dangle upside down by his ankle until he promised to be a much better husband, and the one Merlin wanted. Merlin would have to kill him later for being such an obvious liar, he had already learned never to believe one single word Arthur said to him. Not even knowing Arthur had taken heed and now had Derrick guarding the stairs was enough to assuage his anger, as there should have been somebody down there from the beginning. Somebody who should have been able to stop Clarissa from getting in as far as she did in her own wicked way, and leaving Merlin to be the one to come across them. "But it's no wonder she left that little detail out. All of the other girl's would have had a field day with her if they knew she had been caught in Arthur's bedchambers." Morgana whipped her head around to Merlin as if she had just thought of something. "How are you doing? I don't know how you aren't seething right now, I'd have ripped her blond locks right out of her head if I was in this situation."

"Oh trust me, I wanted too." Merlin said softly, as he stared ahead of him, with his fingers twitching on his knees as if he was imagining doing such a thing before he had shut down completely. Merlin, even now, wanted to hold Clarissa down and take his time to painstakingly yank each golden curl of hair out of her head. Use his magic to force Arthur into a chair so he couldn't pull him off, and make him watch what happens when you happened to be dumb enough to piss off a warlock for the very last time. To give into the demonic urge within him that wanted him to pluck out her eyes for staring at him as if he was the intruder, to cut out her own tongue after speaking to him as if he was the one bothering them and needed to be sent away, cut off her hands as blood spurted everywhere after seeing where they had been heading on Arthur…it was these thoughts that disgusted him and would seem like one more reminder of what a monster he was. Normal people didn't imagine things like that, especially when it was all over a man he now knew he no longer wanted. "But Arthur isn't worth the issues that would follow if I gave into the urge to do it…"

Merlin being consort didn't even protect him from being treated like a common criminal and tracked down like some kind of animal. There was no way his so called 'status' would protect him from going ahead and attacking a noble lady. Especially right in front of Arthur as a witness to the devious acts he'd submitted too. And like he said, Arthur wasn't worth the pain of afterwards. He wouldn't even be worth going so far as to fight a Lady for him. Like he'd told Clarissa herself that afternoon, he would be more than happy to pass Arthur off to her. He only wanted to see the divorce papers first, hold them in his hands as proof of his freedom. And he would laugh himself silly on his journey back along the forests to Ealdor, knowing Clarissa had gotten the rotten end of the deal and didn't even know it yet.

"Well, for what it's worth, I would have helped you hide the body if it got that far." Morgana said with a wryly tone, clearly trying to help Merlin find just a bit of amusement in this situation. It didn't really work, but Merlin flashed her a small grin to show he appreciated her attempts. "But anyway," said the lady, a devious look appearing in her eyes but hidden with her face surrounded by the darkness of the alcove. "Clarissa would never be able to live it down, she'd be publicly humiliated. Any possible prospects she might have for her own suitors, this would cause her own future to be cast in ruins for this. And the best part, no matter what excuse she could give would be good enough. There isn't any possible reason she could give to explain why she, an unmarried woman, was in his room. And those who witnessed the way she was clinging to Arthur the night of the dance…the social circles of higher society would rip her apart in an instant. And since most of the ladies in the castle are married women themselves, they'll pull away from her and may as well keep their husband's away for fear she might go after them next. Clarissa's reputation wouldn't recover so cleanly after such a scandal…"

One could say a lot of things about Morgana, bye she definitely knew how to play around within the system High Society had belt for themselves. He couldn't help but think it was a bit hypocritical in a sense. Yes, Clarissa should be punished, but that was mainly his still churning anger over Arthur and his betrayal talking. The hypocritical part came in when he wondered…what would happen to Arthur in this story? Would Arthur receive the same scorn from society that Clarissa would? Seeking out the company of a married man wasn't a pretty thing to do. But what about the married man himself? Did he not deserve to be ostracized just the same as Merlin himself would? Why did the man who had submitted and attempted adulterer be allowed to go off scott-free? Because he was a prince? Why would Merlin have to live with the shame of being the guy married to an adulterer, and be forced to take on the blame for just not being 'entertaining' enough to keep his husband's attention. It would have done some good for Arthur if he was being shunned, instead of leaving Merlin to deal with the brunt of his actions. Hell, Merlin would have been hung if the story was reversed, and it was he who had been found with his lips onto another man's flesh as they kissed and kissed and kissed. Too bad for Merlin, he would never want to subject an innocent to hiding in the shadows to be protected from the life he was forced to live in.

Hypocritical fools, the lot of them.

"If Arthur had half a brain, he would know how to keep his affair partners a secret." Merlin grumbled underneath his breath to Morgana, forcing fingers to open up before his nails could dig his blood out of his kneecaps. "If Arthur's gonna go around and make a play at cheating on me, the very least he'd should do is keep it discreet-" just like he'd once told Merlin to 'keep it discreet' when the consort had been brandishing a flower on his collar for all of the world to see. "People are going to find out the truth of our situation if Arthur decides to throw caution to the wind and let her wonder in and out of the Royal halls all she pleases."

Fucking Clarissa, he thought agitatedly. But Merlin guessed she really was smarter than she'd looked, trying to pass the story off in her favor. Mostly, the people would believe the first version of a tale that was told, their minds already cemented before the true story had the chance to flourish. Clarissa was clearly trying to get ahead of things and make her own self out to be the victim. But Clarissa wasn't a victim, no matter how she portrayed herself as in front of her lady friends. And Merlin…he refused to be labeled as such. And the embarrassment he knew was waiting for him should the contract start coming to life…as much as he hated helping out the Royal family on this matter when they would do nothing to help themselves, he also had put together his own reasons for having the contract-a damning piece of paper he hadn't even seen in his life-stay in the shadows where it belonged for eternity.

His mother.

Merlin was no fool. He might not understand how the system of high society worked, but he'd been watching and knew what to expect. People would not suddenly 'pity him'-which was probably one of the worse things that could happen. People would turn to look at him as if they felt sorry for him, as if they wanted to help but couldn't do anything that would get him out. Looking at him as if he was just a victim, nothing to his name other than that: the victim and hostage of the Pendragon family-no, it was not in the nature of the people in this city to change their behavior over the reveal of such one fact, like the contract's existence. But he'd already learned how vicious and cruel people were, these people would start saying awful things about his mother no doubt. Calling her out, brave since she was not here to defend herself, for selling her only son to the court. As if none of them would've done the same if they were in that position. Calling her out for being a trickster or whore, somehow able to convince the king to sign whatever papers she had thrown in front of him. Merlin would not have been able to hold his tongue if he had heard such things being said, would have fought back with so much more ferocity than he had been if anybody had dared to speak ill of his mother.

And Merlin was already on thin ice with the king at present, the guards currently searching high and low for him could attest to that. If Merlin started to go around getting into fistfights with anybody who opened their fat mouths…it wouldn't matter if the contract's reveal was all his son's fault, for his own inability to keep it in his damn pants. Uther would have still had his own head for it. The people had once thought Arthur loved him, and that was why he had gotten so much positive attention at their wedding. But now that Arthur's actions told of a different story, they treated him as unwanted, as a swine who somehow managed to trick Arthur into a marriage by fooling him into a love match. But if the contract did come to light, and people started to realize Arthur had never wanted him from the beginning…how long would it be before Merlin had to stop watching for people shoving him into walls as they passed. How long would it be before there was a 'good Samaritan' who wanted to free Arthur from him, and decided killing him would clearly be the only option…

This, Merlin knew, was about him needing to do what he had to do to survive. Even if his will to live was starting to whiter and break, running thinner as each of his days passed him by.

Morgana nudged into his side, forcing Merlin to let loose those thoughts before he could fall back to the dark place trying to smother him with its dark promise of ever loving peace and quiet. And when Merlin turned to her, he could barely see a gentle smile, the briefest hint of her teeth flashing in the darkness in his direction, "For what it's worth," she told him gently. "Rather you are bound here by the contract, or had come here of your own free will, I know for a fact that you are a much better match than Clarissa could ever hope to be if her life was depending on it."

Merlin felt a flicker of amusement well up inside of him even though it died off just as quickly. It was hard to feel anything but irritation when he'd been forced to think on their situation for too long. And the saddest part of it all? Merlin had no right with behaving as if Arthur had betrayed him and their vows in front of the kingdom. They had married in coercion, they had not married with love. Arthur is a grown man, and if he wanted to risk it all-risk the secrecy of how their vows came to be-over some vapid girl he would never even see once she was finally gone from their lives after crawling back to the estate in the country she had came from, then power to him. Maybe she'll distract Arthur enough to keep him off his back. And once the people got wind of it and came for him, well…maybe having a sweet release via death wouldn't be as bad as he thought it was. Hell couldn't have been any worse than what he was already living through.

Maybe things had developed more seriously then either Morgana and Merlin wanted it to be before they would have to risk their lives, because Lady Morgana took this time to make a joke, pushing on Merlin even harder than she had nudged against him the first time, "But hey, maybe Arthur and that bitch deserve each other. Both so caught up with their own lives to see what's right in front of them. So vapid and shallow…but I bet Arthur's gonna be mighty disappointed if he chooses to persist with this endeavor. I mean," Morgana reached out and cupped Merlin's elbow in her hand, giving him this wicked grin. "Have you ever bothered to look and see her chest? How much do you bet she's been secretly stuffing her corset to make it look bigger to attract the boy's attention?"

This statement was so ridiculous to be honest, he could feel a bubble of laughter trying to work out his mouth. He had to cup his hands over his own lips in order to muffle it, for fear that Derrick may hear him and come investigate. And then this time hiding away would have been wasted, even if this was probably not the most appropriate time to go laughing. They were supposed to be fighting the wrongs that was Gwen's sentencing, not laughing in this ridiculous manner, Morgana's cheek smile growing as she saw a little wrinkle forming in the corner of Merlin's eye. But what could he say, only if felt good to have something to laugh about for once.

"You know, Morgana." Merlin said in a drawl tone as he got himself back together, almost doing an exact imitation of Arthur at his worse. Despite him knowing Morgana was taking this brief time they'd had in here to try and cheer him up, he knew she was right in only the worse ways. Clarissa and his 'husband' really were perfect for each other. While the kingdom looked at him, everybody was forced to wonder how Merlin had managed to snag their beloved prince as his own. Not knowing if Merlin had his chance, he would be the first in line to give into his urge to shove Arthur straight off the first cliff he came across. But when they saw Clarissa in his steed instead, the people would see a lady in the making, somebody who complimented the prince and wore the title of consort as if she had been born with it already attached to her very own name. Somebody like her might have even been trained to be consort the second her parents had realized she'd fallen within the age range of their new prince. But Merlin didn't dare address that, as he had no will to rehash his deeper feelings over the Clarissa situation. It felt easier to speak only of the surface issues that had no real place within the seriousness of their situation, "Somehow, her chest size had never really caught my attention before now."

Merlin said this with a wry grin to remind Morgana he was very much gay, and wouldn't exactly stop himself long enough to check out the size of any woman's breasts. Personally, Merlin had never, for the life of him, seen the appeal in a woman or her physical form. There was nothing that interested him in the jiggling slabs of meat attached to their chest, and he could only stare in confusion during his youth when the other boy's had slowly started forming their own interest over it. Merlin had only ever thought a nice set of defined biceps holding around him was the way to go. And obviously, his husband himself had no interest in being the man that would hold him…so fuck him and his new lady love with her stuffed corset…

Morgana had heard many quotes and sayings in her life, being able to quote the scripture of some person who died a million years ago seemed to be almost expected by some men, while others were expecting a woman to not talk at all. And one such quote went along the lines: the eyes are often the windows, giving insight to the soul of the person they belonged to. Morgana wasn't too surprised-as upsetting as it might be-to see how bothered Merlin was by Clarissa, even if he had managed to hold himself together with surprising grace for one not trained to turn the other cheek when they had another noble slighting them. The tone of self deprecating Merlin spoke with despite him trying to land a joke could also speak volumes of what he was saying to her. Without even saying what he meant at all…

Morgana reached up so she can tug on one of the many strings tying her bodice together, "Ah, yes, that's right. You are gay, aren't you." She gave this all mighty sigh, and shook her head with an almost pitiful smile. "That's too bad. Any woman would be pleased to have a man able to look past their form and looks to what lies underneath. Or any man, in your case. I mean, you fought so hard to get here for Gwen, and while we might be stuck for just the moment here, I cannot dare say I know any man in my life who would do the same. It's quite hard to imagine, and would be quite an interesting story to pass along. The Consort of Camelot's finest, a mere man who would give his life for that of one simple serving girl. Now, that's the kind of tale I'd like to see getting written into a ballad, instead of these stories nobody cares to hear of anymore."

Morgana had heard thousands of stories being told in song in the form of ballads over her years in the castle. Every time there was some kind of celebration or party going on, there needed to be some kind of music to entertain more often than it was not. And the stories contained in those songs were the same old things she had heard millions of times before. Stories about brave and greatly over-exaggeratedly handsome men who needed to go to war to save his kingdom. And this knight often had a fair maiden waiting on the shore for him to return home, until she wasted away after he had fallen in battle miles away. They weren't good stories, or inspirational. Just one more way of the men in charge to tell women what their worth was, to do nothing but wait for a man to arrive to save her from loneliness, instead of the woman saving herself. That would have been a much better song to hear, but Morgana wouldn't have minded being able to hear one like this. Where a Royal seemed more than willing to risk it all, to save somebody most people would claim didn't matter. If Morgana was not living through this herself, she would have thought it nothing more than a story.

Morgana herself might be here, but people would rarely write a song about a woman who helped out the hero.

Merlin couldn't have stopped the snort that made a sudden escape from him if he tried, the idea of that was more than ridiculous. Ballads? Things like that were made telling stories about other people, like Arthur who wielded his sword against foes of a different kind, or whatever lame thing the song writer would try to throw in there. They didn't tell stories about gangly boys who needed to take his moment to calm himself so magic wouldn't flutter off his fingertips and go after his enemies. Songs weren't meant to be made for people who had to constantly keep the magic inside his soul quiet or subdued before it was noticed, "You're absolutely joshing with me, aren't you? Ballads are made with heroes in mind. Not with…I couldn't even convince the king my deal was worth keeping. I would even keep all the advice you gave me, and clearly I did something wrong…"

Merlin shrugged on shoulder half-way, not into the turn in their conversation. He wasn't any hero, and there would never be ballads written about him. It would never have songs out there in the world of a boy who hid his magic for the good of himself and did what he must to keep himself safe. There was never going to be stories of a Consort who stood in the way between a tyrant and a serving girl who had only made one mistake: being his friend. Or of a boy who looked his death in the eye, who faced a beast in mortal combat to save one maiden from the awful fate awaiting her. There would never be stories of a boy who took in a shaking breath, and struck out with his magic-unsure if his shoddy and untrained spell work would even work-to contain a beast born of clay and urged to life with water. He was nobody's hero, and not even when he'd done his best in front of the king, had Merlin managed to do anything right. So no, Merlin was more likely to be forgotten by history after he passed on from this world, then he was to have stories or a ballad made out of him.

"Or maybe," Morgan's rolled over onto her knees and reached out to grab onto Merlin's hand, while making sure she had his full attention, "Your doing everything right." Merlin just stared at her with this look of confusion, not sure if Morgana was seeing the same things he was. Because in Merlin's side of things, everything had been going wrong since the very first day he'd arrived. And that had made no change in the last two months. It had gotten so much worse, and he didn't see that changing, no matter how long he was forced to stay around. But Morgana was insisted, voice firm and urgent when she continued on, "Maybe you aren't doing things to Uther's standards, but who cares about him-" it was easy for her to say that though, considering it wasn't her head Uther wanted to stick on a pike in front of the castle as a warning to those who may try to stray off the path the King Pendragon had decided for him. "We're doing this for Gwen. You must care for her a lot, I can't imagine somebody caring to go through such lengths for myself."

Merlin winced, wondering if she would still think he was such a good guy if she knew he'd been the one to get Gwen into this situation to begin with. It wasn't as if he was the good guy the lady seemed to think he was. "Well…she's probably one of the few friends I have in Camelot. So yeah, I do care about her. I would do the same for you too if it was you…" he added in this last bit awkwardly, trying to hide his own shame over this situation. Gwen was his fault, and his responsibility. He wasn't a good guy just because he was doing what he could to fix what he'd broken. If somebody had happened to break something belonging to somebody else-like Arthur breaking his chest-and then returned it brand new, did it ignore what they did? Merlin did not think so, and the same principle applied to the matter now. If Gwen was only in jail because of the things he'd done, and Merlin somehow managed to get her out…it wasn't going to negate all of the trauma he'd caused her over the last day or two of her arrest. What nerve he had, to still refer to her as a friend when odds were…Gwen would not ever get over something like this.

And Merlin couldn't even be punished by Gwen's hand as a way of repenting for his sins. Because Gwen would never know it was him…somebody that had visited her in the cells and watched as the strain and stress and helplessness overtook her.

"That's sweet," Morgana said, her face softening at the thought of Merlin going through the same lengths to help her if she was in trouble. But her face hardened just as fast, and Morgana looked to the thick curtains shielding them from view while it kept their privacy. "But we don't need sweet at the moment. You're a lover Merlin, and while that's a rare find in a world like this, what we need at the moment is a fighter."

Merlin didn't know what Morgana meant by 'being a lover'. He didn't think he was particularly lovable at all, or maybe he just hadn't found the right one to love, he didn't know. It was pretty hard to love the only option he had in that department. Though to be honest, it was pretty hard to even look near him without getting ill by this point. But Merlin did know what she meant by needing a fighter, while ignoring the brief indignation that flooded through him. Because hello, Merlin could fight just as well on his own! He didn't need a fancy prince with his fancy sword with a head far too up his arse, Merlin was surprised Arthur seemed to still be breathing decently on his own. Merlin squashed down that growing urge to protest, knowing Morgana had no way of knowing Merlin had his own skill set in that department, and would have been able to handle himself just fine.

"What should we do then?" Merlin asked, moving to sit beside her. Morgana was peeking an eye out of the curtain, narrowed onto Derrick who has yet to budge in the time they've been there. This had been fine before, but neither of them could afford to wait here. Especially if Derrick was planning on standing their all night long. "This has gone on for long enough. Maybe if I just made a run for it, then he won't be able to catch me. And you can run off to get Arthur and I'll just meet you at the cave." He threw his suggestion out there. Anything would've been better than just sitting here. He didn't know what time it was, but they've had to have been sat there for almost sn hour at least. Morgana clearly hadn't realized when Derrick went on guard, then he was going to 'stay' on guard…

"That's it." Morgana suddenly said, eyes glowing in excitement as she seemed to have been struck out of the blue by an idea. The Lady in question dropped the little bit of curtain she'd been holding aside, the darkness covering them again without the brief hint of the torchlights flickering out in the hall to give them light. And she was looking at him with unbidden excitement over her idea, although Merlin himself clearly had no idea where she was going with any of this. "First off, no. You cannot go running off like that, what happens if I manage to get Arthur to the caves and you are nowhere to be found. We won't be able to wait on you-" Merlin opened his mouth in protest, because nobody was gonna have to wait on him. He would make sure he was there before even them, maybe he would even have the monster dispatched before they'd even get there…fuck. He needed his damn alibi to get out of this. "And all that's gonna do is get all of the knights riled up and working double team to try and find you. So that's not gonna help us. But I do have an idea."

Most men would have turned away from Morgana without a second though, dismissing any idea she could have possibly had without bothering to hear any of the details. Because as a woman, it wasn't feasible for Morgana to be smart enough to bring anything of importance to the table. But Merlin did not care for such stupid or barbaric traditions held by the standards of a court he didn't care about in the first place, "What is it then?" He asked, as he listened to her with rapt attention. It wasn't like he had anything better to go off of anyway, and that's why Merlin was always opened to suggestions. He was a fish out of water, and had no problems with taking advice or such from somebody who'd know what they were talking about. IE: somebody in the world who wasn't Arthur, content with only things that made himself look good, rather than focusing on the big picture.

"I will warn you now." Morgana said after she took a long and slow deep breath, clearly expecting to hear Merlin fighting her on this now. "You won't be liking it." And Merlin frowned deeply, not sure why Morgana thought she was talking to Arthur in this moment instead of him. He wasn't going to throw an adult tantrum and demand things go a different way if he didn't like it. Merlin didn't 'like it' when it became clear to him he was about to be married off. Merlin hadn't liked it when he'd met Arthur for the first time, and he hadn't liked it when the same prince proved time and time again that Merlin was right in his assessment: Arthur wasn't trustworthy.

"Just lay it on me, actually doing something would be better than just waiting here." Merlin said with a firm resolution. Morgana seemed pretty confident when she said he wasn't going to like whatever it was she was about to say. But Merlin knew he was pretty confident as well. He was stronger than the people thought he was. He had managed to hide his magic, going through life as unseen as he was able to-with his mother doing most of the work in his earlier childhood-into adulthood. Inside of this world, where everybody was looking for magic to explain any decrepit going on in their lives. So, he knew there wasn't a thing on this earth Morgana, could have said that would upset him.

"You need to be the one to talk to Arthur."

"WHA-"

Merlin's scream of horror and despair would be abruptly cut off before it could travel through the thick curtains. As loud as his scream had been, it was only a miracle they didn't have ten knights on them in a heartbeat, yanking the curtains open as they drug them out into the view of the torchlights to catch sight of their faces. Merlin ended up with his back pressed harshly against the stone wall as the Lady surged forward, sprawling in between his legs in an effort to reach his mouth, pressing hand against the softness of his mouth to muffle all the shouting he was doing. Morgana had clearly been expecting for some kind of outraged exclamation to come from him, because she had already been moving before Merlin could get the full word out of his mouth. But still, Merlin continued ranting to Morgana, all of his words indistinguishable due to her hand muffling his voice.

"Merlin, Merlin." Morgana hissed at him over all of the ranting going on behind her hand, feeling the hot breath of Merlin going across her palm. "You need to calm down. I know this situation isn't the most ideal one we could have hoped for-" since it wasn't exactly in the game plan to get stuck right behind this curtain for an hour. They thought they would be able to wait things out, and everything would work out on its own once they'd waited for long enough for Derrick to leave on his own or go take a break. But sometimes, waiting wasn't the answer they needed. Sometimes, people had to get up and actually do something to 'make' the things they wanted to happen. Shit was about to get real, and were they going to be the ones that sat back and watched the worse as it happened from afar?

Hell no.

The time for their petty mind games and pseudo bonding-because what bonded people together than risking life and limb and reputation to save another-was over and done with.

"Not ideal!" Merlin's voice was loud enough and more clear than anything he'd said as of yet, not removing Morgana's hand himself if only because he knew he needed it to keep himself quiet. There was a time for quiet and a time for being outraged, though Merlin was finding it difficult to determine which course of action would be best for now. The sounds of rapid ranting started off against with as much enthusiasm and urgency as it had been the first time. Morgana hesitated to take her hand off, but she moved it just slightly-ready to clamp back down the second she thought Merlin's volume had gotten out of hand again-so she could understand what he was saying a bit better. "That's what you said! You were the one that supposed to do-" and Morgana's hand snapped back down, just like the viper of a snake would to capture its prey. And to subdue it long before the prey itself would have been able to make a single squeak of alarm in its wake before it was swallowed hole.

"I know that's what I said, but things have been changing. When I said that, I wasn't expecting us to get stuck here, nor was I expecting that we had to hide you from every knight and guard marching throughout the castle. At this point, I think we'll be lucky if Arthur is even in his room, and not off and trekking through the castle himself trying to track you down." Morgana spoke rationally and concise as she implored onto Merlin why she had to back off what she said she'd do. Morgana had a second plan in motion for what she would be doing in the meantime, but that meant only Merlin would have the opportunity to get upstairs. And if anybody in the world could make Arthur see reason-or make him mad enough to follow simply to shut himself up-then it would be Merlin. "All you have to do is go up there while I distract Derrick so you can be able to sneak pass. Arthur will follow once you've done the hardest part: convincing him to come to the caves with us."

Merlin had gone quiet at some point while the lady explained her reasonings for this sudden change in direction. But now, he shook his head rapidly to get Morgana's hands to let up off his mouth, "And what makes you think I'll be able to convince him to do anything?" He demanded, making sure to be the one to keep his voice low so Morgana wouldn't take charge and slap her hands across his mouth once again. Merlin hated to think of it-especially as he'd considered Morgana as one of the pseudo members of the false council he'd been forming in his mind-but he almost felt betrayed in a way. He might still be bitter about how Arthur had broken the one and only promise he'd actually made for him-about making sure their quarters stayed more private, keeping him safe from strangers inside his own room wanting to just waltz in and assault him on the spot. It didn't even mattered that he didn't live there anymore, he still considered the promise broken-and he was probably just projecting all the bitterness onto Morgana, but that was how he was feeling. Morgana the betrayer: just like Arthur who broke his promises and just like Uther who'd broke his word. It was the whole Pendragon family it had seemed, that was our to get him. "Arthur hates me to his blackened depths. The only thing this would do is having him laughing in my face if he doesn't outright turn me way the second I show my face in his room." Although, Arthur might try to force him down again to get his way…Merlin refused to go there even in the safety of his own mind.

Merlin wasn't guessing or speculating what would happen after he ignored his own vow to never go to Arthur for help again. He knew with everything in his body…Arthur wouldn't entertain him or any of his 'mental afflictions' acting up in his presence any longer. Arthur's soul really was nothing more than a blackened husk where his heart was, and he was unable to look further than his own nose in most cases. People had the nerve to call Merlin as the wicked one, the one that had lured their oh so innocent prince into a false marriage for his riches and the like. People would call him the Son of the devil Satan himself, or they knew about the things he could do. And yet…Merlin had never driven any other person to the edge, to the point of no return where he wanted to take his own life before what was left of him was stripped away from him. Yeah, Merlin was pretty sure there was absolutely not a thing inside of Arthur-a soul or otherwise-that was able to resemble a human being.

Despite Merlin's reasoning being very good ones, if he did say so himself, Morgana didn't take them as an answer, moving her hand down from Merlin's mouth to put on his shoulder, "Merlin, I know you'll be able to do this, because I know 'you.'" She said with firm resolution solidifying her voice. All Merlin needed was a confident boost, Morgana had done decided on her own. To know he had the ability to do so much more than just pulling together all of this. He'd already made it this far-he had already figured out what was causing the sickness when no other had-so she knew Merlin could do the last final stretch needed. "You're the kind of man who puts others before himself, you literally threw your own self into the flames to try getting Gwen out of them. And the kind of man that isn't charmed and easily swayed by Arthur and his 'princely' charms. Nor will you allow his moods or his anger and his ignorance frighten you away. If anybody can drill it into his thick head, it'll be you who can beat it into his skull." Because, Morgana thought privately in her mind, if Merlin could still stand here today and was brave enough to leave his own room after his self-imposed isolation, even after the few and far incidents she'd witnessed herself, then he was no coward.

He just needed to be reminded of that, and Lady Morgana felt as if she was the perfect lady for that kind of job.

"…How can you possibly know what kind of man I am?" Merlin asked her, knowing Morgana couldn't possibly know anything about him. If she knew he was magic, then she would run. If she knew Merlin had thoughts-more and more on having his noose placed around his neck with his own hands-than she would probably call him weak, for not having the will-power to continue with the desolate life he had been given. It was hard to imagine how it had taken two shorts months for him to turn into some neurotic mess of a person, where even getting out of bed was starting to wear on him. He knew this was obviously Morgana's attempt at making him feel better, encouraging him to get his arse up the stairs. Because she was right, Merlin might have been done with Arthur and his attitude but he was never afraid of him. But how was Morgana to know she had only made himself feel worse, and he now had a stone somewhere in his belly, one constant reminder of how inadequate he was. Morgana had her own expectations for him apparently, and the expectations may not allow with Uther or Arthur's, but they were there nonetheless. And Merlin knew he was going to let her down. "We've only known each other for two months…"

Merlin knew, this wasn't nearly enough time to be able to know rather or not somebody was able to get the job done. It had been plenty of time for the consort to know Arthur wasn't worth all the misery he had called him. Knew it was enough time to be able to make the huge decision of not allowing the negativity that was Arthur drag him down into the pits of hell with him. He just needed to never talk to his husband again, that was the simple solution to all of his problems. But it wasn't so simply when Merlin needed an alibi to vouch for him in front of the king…but there was also a huge difference as it stood between Morgana and Arthur. Merlin may not know Morgana as well as she apparently knew him, but he did know he didn't want to disappoint her, or allow his own turmoil over the situation get in the way of saving Gwen.

"And sometimes, that is all the time one needs to get to know somebody." Morgana interrupted him before Merlin could give her another million or so excuses as for why this would be a bad idea. She didn't need a Merlin who doubted himself, and she didn't need a Merlin who allowed his panic to take his senses. She needed a Merlin who had freaked out on her the day they met when he'd walked into her room while she was changing, and ended up helping her decide her outfit. She needed to see a Merlin who stood in front of a crown of onlookers and married a man-vowing his heart and soul-to a stranger he'd never escape. She needed a Merlin who stood in front of the council, and spoke not of his apparent assault but of magic, warning them the stranger in their midst had pledged himself to killing the kingdom's heir. She needed to have the Merlin who apparently went back to the council of men-and stood in front of them and the king even when most would hide after the awful, humiliating display of the last time-to declare the innocence of a handmaiden, offering to take her place in the pit. Despite the overwhelming evidence that told a different story. "Even if you didn't realize it, or did not notice me, I've been watching every step you have made in Camelot. Every footstep or imprint you've made as you've done thing to cause waves here in the city-"

"So, you're a stalker too?" Merlin interrupted her before she could get too deep, this wry and dryly sarcastic grin on his face as he leaned his head to thump softly against the wall behind him. Now, he wasn't usually the type of guy to hide from any of his emotions, maybe because he had been raised far differently than any of these nobles, most who looked as if they had never seen a happy day with their own lives and needed to take their very own misery out on everybody else. But he was feeling too emotionally charged by what was happening to do anything else. Arthur had been stalking him enough for one person, placing that stupid guard on him who reported every little thing he did back to him. And then refusing to leave him alone when he set eyes on him, apparently Arthur thought he would do something to embarrass him while he'd done nothing but stand there. Merlin really didn't need to know Morgana did the same, only much more subtle and in her own ways than Arthur ever could.

"Cut the crap, Merlin." Morgana told him, gaining Merlin's full and undivided attention the second his name left her lips. She hadn't shown humor in Merlin's sarcasm, and clearly felt there wasn't any time for such a thing. But that was probably most likely since Merlin's tone had lacked any humor to begin with. Morgana wasn't playing with him, her face set into a smooth stone, "You can talk smack all you life. But you and I both know you don't get scared easily. Not like the fools that like to parade around this place as if they were granted the kiss of god themselves. Your probably the only one I'd trust with this, someone I trust not to back down if Arthur starts slinging his insults or demanding you be reverent to his very presence as if he was really the god of all beings and creatures in the world we live in."

Merlin looked promptly horrified by all of the many things Morgana had just announced within her tiny speech. First off, he wasn't some infallible person who feared nothing, and probably in fact, scared much easier than most people. But that was only because Merlin had 'serious' things he needed to fear. Like fire, fire that peeled off his flesh while he was watched dying in agonizing pain with people watching and cheering for the death of the simple sorcerer. He was scared of being stuck in Camelot for the rest of his days, scared he would never be able to find his freedom or his wings to fly as far from this place as he possibly could. Scared he'd die a prisoner just as he had lived, scared he had no chance of ever being able to see his mother for the rest of his limited days. Scared she'd die alone while he was far away, unable to help her or even know it had happened….but she was right about a single detail: Merlin wasn't scared of Arthur. Now, he was tired of his attitude. And just the thought of him was enough to make his feel exhausted and weary, like his energy had been drained right out of his body before they even interacted. So there was absolutely no darn good reason for Merlin to even try entertaining this plan of Morgana's. There was no point in Morgana distracting Derrick if he and Arthur were going to get his attention with the yelling…

"…You are the only one who thinks I'm not afraid of anything." Merlin said quietly, half underneath his breath. Although he didn't give Morgana any kind of insight into his previous thoughts, not when he knew the biggest of them were intertwined within his magic. And he couldn't risk any hint of such a thing being discovered to the ward of the king. He wasn't stupid enough to believe, just because she was cooler than the rest of the people that took in as an orphaned child, would choose the stranger she'd just met over them if it came down to it.

"No, I'm not!" This was apparently Morgana's turn to raise her voice loudly, and she had to snap her own jaw shut before she grew much louder than even the thick curtains would have been able to contain. Morgana shook her head before she was pushing herself back, sitting on her hunches more than she was on Merlin, in a strange reminiscent of how Arthur had been sitting on his legs during their last conversation. Only Merlin didn't have the urge to kick her where it hurts, or scream himself hoarse until he was finally heard by 'somebody' in this messed up life. "Gwen is also counting on you herself to be brave enough to do this. And are you really going to let her down? Now? Since we're so close to finishing this? Or was all your talk about 'getting her out' only pretty words?"

Merlin opened his mouth to demand how Morgana could possibly have known he'd told Gwen that his first visit to her in the cells. But he shut his mouth just as fast when he realized…Morgana really did know more about what went on here than others would have. Besides, it was entirely possible she might have gone back and visited Gwen at some point after he'd left her but before he'd gone back to see her for the second time. But Morgana didn't seem wrong with her words either, as loathe as he was to admit it. Gwen was worth anything, and he hadn't been sprouting 'pretty words' when he told her he was going to get her out of there. He could not think of anybody less deserving to be forced to endure what she was right now. Gwen with her curly hair and dimpled smile and happily handing out flowers to those who needed it then most…he who needed her to make this life a little bit more bearable than it was. Surely Gwen and his sudden need for some kind of alibi after he managed to get his grasp onto the head of the beast, weren't outweighed by his hatred for Arthur…

It was very close though.

Morgana apparently didn't see Merlin's resolution starting to wane and crumble into dust when she brought Gwen back into it, because she continued with her lecturing, speaking faster and faster as if she thought Merlin was going to interrupt her long before she could get it all out, "You had no fear as you stepped in front of the council and spoke out against Valiant. A knight with everything to gain in the tourney, and nothing to lose because he knew he'd be believed over a peasant. Even a peasant married to the prince. And you didn't even bring up the foul way he'd behaved towards you, Arthur was the one that did this…" Morgana trailed off in her assessment as she voiced her earlier thoughts to Merlin, something odd entering her eyes.

Merlin couldn't help but shift uncomfortably under her. If he wasn't mistaken, she was looking at him with awe, as if nobody else on the planet had ever dared to accuse a knight of such barbaric and this abhorrent behavior before. But then again, maybe nobody had ever tried to make a stand and do the only thing they could, or maybe he had just been naive to even try. Sure, things had all worked out in the end. But look at where he was now with the people, worse off than he was when he'd first got here. That was the excuse people used after all as they tried to kick him to the ground with the words and insults or even physically doing it: because he was a piss poor excuse for a consort if he wasn't able to handle a little council meeting so badly, his own husband had left him to finish and handle the situation on his own.

Morgana continued on without more than a single second's pause, "And then you went back to face them again. Because Gwen needed you, and she still needs you now. And we cannot abandon her just because you and Arthur have personal issues to work out. It's not the time for personal grudges and hate to get in the way. You can go back to just ignoring him 'after' Gwen is away from Uther!"

…Fuck, Merlin thought as he resisted the urge to bash his head again and again into the wall until he could use the excuse of having brain damage to stop him from doing this. Why did everybody in this world have to be right on some kind of deep level? There was the dragon, who gave Merlin the perfect reason to drag himself up by his own nails until he was outside Arthur's door. He wouldn't be going up there because he truly thought the blond would have a change of heart and decided he had no choice but to listen to his consort. He wouldn't be going up there because he had any hope left in Arthur's humanity to do the right thing, rather or not his father would approve of the action. But he would be doing it because he needed to carefully manipulate Arthur into doing exactly what he was needed for, to be in the perfect position to declare Merlin innocent of magic if people tried to look too deeply into the destruction of the beast. And then there was Morgana…whose faith in Merlin's ability to convince Arthur-because Merlin was an awful liar, so how in the world would he be able to force down the sickness Arthur's presence stewed right threw him long enough to move him into place and not have Arthur suspect any wrongdoings on his part-was clearly much stronger than the faith he had in himself.

But…Gwen…it all came down to what he would be willing to risk for Gwen. Even if that meant he was gonna have to shred off a bit of his soul, and use Arthur to his advantage instead of allowing him to play him like the fool he thought he was.

"I'll…I I'll try," Merlin finally agreed, even though he felt as if he was making a huge mistake before he had even tried. The consort whipped his head up to connect eyes with Morgana, feeling he should at least give the last a firm warning that this was all going to fail. They were wasting time just trying to get him to come… "But I'm not who you think I am, really! You are underestimating my ability not to strange Arthur! He wouldn't listen to me even if I threw the real sorcerer already wrapped in ropes directly at his feet…" which was an interesting idea to behold. Tying his hands behind his back with a sign pinned to his chest: I'm the sorcerer, might've gotten his attention. But Merlin doubted anymore that Arthur would take him seriously. He'd just cut him free and then tell him to stop trying to bother him with such nonsense before throwing him out on his arse. Arthur wouldn't know a real sorcerer if Merlin went and bit him on the arse himself.

"Then 'make him' listen." Morgana spoke as she wiggled herself off from his legs, her blue skirts fanning out for a brief moment as she stood to her feet, not taking any of Merlin's words for the poor excuses she thought they were. Nothing anything more than a poor boy wanting to ignore what his responsibilities as consort should be: keeping the land fair and just for all that live there, where one simple handmaiden wouldn't have to live in fear of being accused of practicing what one considered to be the darkest of were. "You are much stronger than you apparently give yourself credit for. If you could convince Arthur to go up in front of the very council for you once, then you can convince him to fight for Gwen now. All you need to do is keep in mind, this isn't about us or out wants. This is for Gwen."

It sounded really great when Morgana would put it like that. But the whole problem came in when the consort in question was forced to realize…he was not 'great'. He wasn't some all powerful sorcerer in the making who would help magic return to lands that had scorned it for decades. He wasn't some Peasant Consort, who would make the kingdom a safe place for those without money to live in, with his eyes kept on the good of the people instead of just the good of the nobles. Merlin wouldn't even be able to comfort himself with the idea this was all his youth's fault. He wasn't mature enough with handling the power-both magical and not-directly at his fingertips. It didn't matter to Merlin that this was what being young was for-to make mistakes and to get messy doing them. How else would he learn from his mistakes if he didn't make mistakes that forced him to learn? But this wasn't a simple mess that could be cleaned up with a dishcloth to be disposed of. When he made mistakes, it would be other people who got hurt from them. It was a world where a simple healing spell could knock all and everything he knew out of whack. It was some world, where a farm boy from nowhere was clearly expected to handle responsibilities he could have never prepared for.

"Now," Morgana announced, taking a few steps to back up as much as the small cubby hole allowed her to so he had room to stand up for himself. "Are you going to demand Arthur come down here with you while I distract Derrick, or am I expected to do both parts myself?" And she gave him a sarcastic life of her eyebrow, clearly expecting Merlin to be the one to make the right choice. For Gwen. And Merlin did, and would, make the right choice. He might not be 'great' but he would damn well try to be…

"…No, he's my husband." Merlin said slowly, but he could feel a red hot urge of determination making his heart speed up in his chest. The urge to storm up to Arthur's room and tell him off, while forcing him back down the stairs as everybody had been telling him too, was almost to much for his under-fed body to handle. He could fucking do this, and he could fucking bash Arthur across his fool head if he tried to argue with him more than he would be willing to entertain. And he could do all of that, and get Arthur to the caves, without being caught by a city worth of guards looking for him. It would be a damn delicious piece of cake…right? The boy shook those thoughts out of mind before he could fall back into his pattern of doubting himself, there was no time for him to doubt himself. "I will bloody well deal with him."

After all, like he'd said, Arthur was 'his' husband to manage. So why would he send somebody else to do the job when it was one more responsibility of his he needed to take seriously. Nobody else had any response or should be forced to deal with one of Arthur's 'fits'. Merlin didn't even want to have to deal with them either, but if he couldn't escape all of their fights, then he would damn well let Arthur know when he had stepped out of line. Exactly like the newest member of his false pseudo council in the making, Merlin wasn't scared of him. Tired and not entire sure he could do this despite all of the bravado he had put on for Morgana: yes. Afraid of him though?…never.

"Good," Morgana said, her painted red lips started to stretch out into a smile, looking pleased by his sudden declaration. Clearly, the Lady of the Court thought within the sanctuary of her own mind, the consort needed this far more than she did. She'd known not of what Arthur may have possibly done to shake Merlin's confidence within himself, but she did hope she managed to restore just a bit of himself that had been lost before. The Merlin she liked, rather than the Merlin who was so reckless, he would rather face a beast on his own instead of bringing Arthur and his sword into play. Maybe the whole: getting trapped behind the curtain thing in the alcove, hadn't been as terrible as it first was. Not if she and Merlin had been able to bond more than they had before. But bonding time was over it seemed, as Morgana pulled aside the curtain just far enough for her to see out again. "Then I will go and distract Derrick. And you meet me with Arthur out front, right next to the pyre, agreed?"

No, Merlin didn't agree. "The pyre? You do mean the same pyre that is being swarmed by guards at this very moment, right? That pyre? The one they are planning to tie me too should any of the men running around the castle catch sight of my face? You want to meet there?" Although that wasn't a half-bad idea. The people in Camelot were looking for Merlin, so he just had to 'not' look like Merlin in the least as he wondered throughout the castle to get where he needed to go. He wondered if there was some kind of spell he could use that would be able to make him look like a different person. One where he wouldn't have to sacrifice another to do it, like Mary Collins had done for the singer at their wedding Helena. But no, using magic when he had known he most definitely 'shouldn't' was exactly what had gotten him into this mess to begin with.

"Which," Morgana said, looking over her shoulder at him, smile turning more wicked looking than it had been before. "Is exactly why it's the perfect spot for us to meet up. Everybody will be so busy with running around the castle itself, trying to be the one who has the honor of finding you so they can bring you before the king. Nobody would think for two seconds that you were dumb enough to go to the exact place they were trying to bring you to in the first place." And Merlin wanted to admit this, but that plan was…kinda brilliant. Who would think Merlin would stand at the very foot of the place he was supposed to breathe his last. And unless he'd been mistaken, the pyre itself had probably been finished already. So nobody would be out there in the dark, trying to finish up construction before they lit the dark sky with fire and torches galore.

"Alright," Merlin nodded his head, pushing up onto his feet so Morgana was no longer looming along his body. Although…he hadn't really appreciated being reminded that people thought capturing him and bringing him to his death would be looked at like some kind of 'honor'. He wondered if they had some kind of reward that would go with the honor as a bonus. Maybe a pouch of gold or they got the choice for a patch of land they wanted to have put in their name. What would be given in equal worth to the life of Camelot's Consort, and what kind of messed up priorities did these people have where they had nothing better to do than send a castle wide search party out for one boy who, as far as anybody knew, hadn't actually done anything that was more than talking back to the king. Geez, the people just wanted to kill him for anything under the sun, didn't they? "But what exactly will you be doing to distract Derrick?"

He only asked this because he needed to know what to expect. Would Morgana give Derrick some false story that would lure him away? Leaving him to be able to sneak upstairs. Derrick wouldn't be that great of a guard if the first story he heard was enough to make him leave his post. But really, who knows. Maybe Derrick would think he could trust the ward of the king to be telling him the truth of some big emergency that would obviously need to have his quick and immediate attention onto it at all costs.

Morgana seemed pretty sure of herself when she flashed him a cheeky grin, "You just handle Arthur, and leave me to handle this. Trust me, you'll know the exact moment to move." And before Merlin got the chance to ask anymore questions, or demand a better explanation, because Morgana 'obviously' underestimated his ability to recognize what she'd use as his cue to move, she was gone. Flipping off the curtain and striding through it with every bit of the grace and confidence a lady of her station was expected to have. Her facial expression would tell anybody watching that there was absolutely not a thing wrong with her just appearing out of almost nowhere, because why wouldn't a Lady want to be spending her resting time hidden in an alcove and not her very comfortable bedroom that was only a short walk from where she was now.

"Lady Morgana?" Merlin heard Derrick say when the curtain was starting to fall shut behind her and doing its just to shield him just out of view as the one man still standing inside. His voice had shown exactly how baffled he was, especially since he'd been standing here for god-knows-how long and hadn't noticed either of them diving in. But to his credit at least, the knight had more class than to ask what the lady above his station could've been doing, sullying herself in an alcove while hiding as if she wasn't one of the most sought after women of the kingdom. It was a good thing Derrick didn't know Morgana had been with Merlin. Uther would not take too kindly to Morgana taking pleasure in Merlin's company unwatched. He'd barely allowed them to have their lunches, and this-in the eyes of high society-would have looked fairly suspicious worthy, and more fuel for the gossip fodder if he'd been caught with her.

Merlin acted quickly on his own, so he wouldn't be caught unaware once his apparent cue-that would hopefully be obvious enough even he would have been able to recognize it for what it was-and was tugging the curtain open. Just enough for one of his eyes-covered by the shadows within and thick enough to shield him from view-to peek out to get a good look at what was going on outside the little safety bubbled he'd concocted himself inside of.

"Good, good. I've been looking for someone. And it's about time I've found one of you guards. I can swear, it's like half of the castle is empty." said the lady in an odd tone, striding straight up to Derrick as her shoes clicked along with her steps. It would not be a tone Merlin had ever heard from her, as it seemed more regal. Something she would have to use in certain situations, like now, rather than with her day to day activities. Merlin could feel a bit of his anxiety rearing up, wishing Morgana had been just a bit more clear of what she planned to do for his cue. He had to be focused on every little thing, trying to pinpoint exactly what it would be. Maybe Morgana would do a little finger motion behind her back where he could see it, encouraging him with the motion to make his move. Or maybe it was the hair flip she'd just done, tossing her braid over her shoulder so it fell down her back was the cue…

"Well they're busy searching for the fugitive, Lady Morgana." Derrick said in an 'I'm chilled and could quite possibly be stoned as fuck' voice, as if their Lady of the court might not know what's going on in the kingdom….fugitive? That urge to be able to bash his head against the wall, over and over until he had nothing more than a pile of mush clinging to the wall and slinking down to the ground in very nasty brain juice puddling underneath him, felt so much more apparent. Merlin knew he'd referred to himself as a fugitive, but to know that it was what he was 'really' being called right now…one would think he was an outlaw. Somebody who had stolen thousands of gold coins right out of the kingdom's Royal treasury himself, killing a few guards with an escape attempt gone wrong. Good lord, what was wrong with this people? Was Merlin really the big problem at the moment.

"Yes, yes." Morgana agreed with the knight, while dismissing the knight's words as if it was nothing important. Merlin's eyes focused directly onto her hand and watching as it waved in a dismissive way to the knight. Was that his signal? But Merlin saw the hand as it came back down to Morgana's side and Merlin deflated on the spot. Okay, so maybe it wasn't the sign he was looking for. "I've heard all about that nasty business concerning Merlin. But I can assure you-" Merlin watched as Morgana was walking around Derrick, stopping by the banister with a gentle hand resting on the edge of it…this cue looking business was clearly tougher then he had thought it would be. "That the Consort is not out to get my head. So you can relax-"

Merlin's head jolted up and a flash of panic shot through him when he heard Morgana gave a loud and sudden cry of pain. What in the world…