Another week another chapter! I hope you all enjoy this next chapter, the case is wrapping up but there is more to the story. Thank you all for the love and support again!
We were built to fall apart
Then fall back together
Are we out of the woods yet?
Are we out of the woods?
Are we in the clear yet?
Out of the Woods by Taylor Swift
Emily ordered pizza on the way home from the show, arriving at the Lightmans' house soon after they returned. They sat together and enjoyed dinner as a family, Emily gushed over how amazing and unforgettable the night was to her parents.
"I'm so glad you had a good time; I doubt any of your other friends went to a fashion show on spring break." Zoe smiled warmly at her daughter.
"Oh, no doubt, and coming back with custom Lavi as well? Its unreal!" Emily exclaimed, taking another bite of her pizza.
"Now, do you have to go back to school, luv?" Cal asked, giving his daughter his best puppy-dog eyes.
"I'm pretty sure my parents wouldn't be too thrilled if I wasted all of their money for school - by not returning to finish said schooling." Emily teased playfully, giving her dad a wide-eyed look.
"For what we are paying, you are going back early." Zoe joked at her daughter after receiving a fake look of outrage from the young girl.
"I need to jump on my laptop and get some work done tonight. I have missed this—us sitting down together as a family." She looked lovingly at her daughter, glancing back at Cal before returning her gaze."Try and get some rest tonight honey; I know you are still so hyped up." She kissed her daughter's head, giving Cal a soft nod before exiting the dining room.
Cal watched as Zoe left, looking back to see his daughter watching him intently.
"Pease tell me you guys arent getting back together?" She said it matter-of-factly, soft enough for her mother not to hear her, staring at her father intently.
"What would give you that idea?" He faked surprise at her questioning, his stomach knotting inside at the disappointment trailing over his daughter's face.
"I'm not a child, dad. You can just be honest with me." She looked down at her plate. Aggressively taking a bite of her pizza.
You can't lie to her mate; never could. She's too much like you. Just tell her the truth, better for her to be disappointed in the truth then disappointed you lied to her.
"It was a discussion, yes." He said it with a shake of the head, taking a bite of his own pizza.
"and?" She dragged out the word looking directly into his eye, waiting for a glimmer of anything on his features.
"And… I will always love you, mom Em." He said softly, receiving a disappointed look from his daughter. Seeing her close her eyes after his remark, he continued. "But…I don't think that it's good for us…either of us." He watched as she smiled softly to herself, ducking her head down satisfied with his answer.
"Thought kids normally want their parents to get back together?" Cal asked, relaxing back in his chair and watching her.
She paused, biting her lips back and looking down; her eyes blinked rapidly as she searched for the words to say.
"I used to… but this isn't the first time you two have crossed paths and gotten close." She shook her head at the word "close," letting him know what she really meant by it.
"When I was younger, I hoped you would reconcile. I always thought of all the good times we had together as a family... But I think when I was younger, I glorified it in my mind. You had good times together, but you also fought often. I know you thought I couldn't hear it, but I knew what was going on….The smiles and laughter were far less frequent than I told myself they where. In reality it was more often then not awkward silent dinners or snide comments."
"Emily I-"
"I just want you both to be happy, Dad… You both are happier when you aren't together." She said it sadly, her eyes glossing as she spoke the words.
Cal sat back in his chair, stunned by his daughter's words, seeing nothing but total and complete honesty from her. His eyes were getting wet from her confession; his bodys reaction from seeing how all of this had and has effected her.
"Right, you are my love." He said it softly, reaching out and putting his arm around her shoulder, squeezing it.
"Why do you keep-"
"Familiarity. We know exactly who the other is…. There is no fear of the unknown because we have done it time and time again. Not that it makes it right."
"Ever heard of the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing and expecting a different outcome?" She somewhat teased him, but he could see that she meant what she was saying.
"Just because you're going to some fancy school doesn't mean you get to use your newfound knowledge on your dad." He joked about pulling her into his side; a small laugh came from her as they both smiled together.
"Just looking out for you, dad. You can see the lies; I can see when you're lying to yourself."
"oi do tell, what am I lying to myself about?"
"That you are in love with Gillian, and you are distracting yourself by looking literally everywhere else… and not telling her."
"Darling, it's complicated."
"How is it complicated? You love her; you read people, dad, and you can see she loves you in return."
"Being in love with and loving someone are vastly different things. They are extremely difficult to differentiate with microexpressions. Especially with someone you are so familiar with."
"You could just tell her rather than rely on microexpressions, ya know like a normal human?" She smiled at him, waiting for his response.
"Its more than that… It's risky; we are business partners… best friends… It could jeopardize everything."
"Is she not worth the risk, Dad?" she asked in anticipation of his answer, her eyes wide.
What do I even say to that? I was not prepared for any of this, especially from my own bloody daughter. She did make me finally admit how I truly feel about Zoe and I. We shouldn't be together. No matter how many times we try. She was spot on about Zoe and me, and I'm sure she is spot on about Gillian as well. She is worth the risk; it would be worth the risk. But the god's honest truth is that I'm fucking scared.
Emily searched his face, watching her father look deep in thought after her question. She finally spoke up, interrupting his train of thought.
"You're happier with her dad. You've always been happier with her." She stood up, grabbing the now empty plates and loading them in the dish washer.
"I could see it when I was a kid. That's why I have always liked her…. That's why I love her. You could be having the worst day, and she would make it better. You and mom, you're like fire and fire; together, you just make a bigger fire. Gil is like water—a wave of calmness. She doesn't let you walk on her; she still challenges you, fights you but in her way… without escalating things to total combustion." She leaned over the counter to look at her father.
Cal sat wide-eyed and shocked, rubbing his jaw with his hand.
"I just want you to be happy, dad. I want mom to be happy... I should brush my teeth and head to bed." She walked around the kitchen counter to kiss her dad on the cheek. "Night, I love you."
Cal watched as she walked to her bedroom, closing the door softly behind her. Feeling his phone vibrate from a text, he looked down to see the aforementioned woman of the hours name.
'I went ahead and let Elizabeth know to add your name to the rest of the fashion shows this week. Since you're obviously obsessed with them now.'
He couldn't stop himself from laughing after reading her text.
You're happier with her; you've always been happier with her.
Another text from her appeared.
'How was the rest of your night?'
Smiling down at his phone, he let his finger hover over the text keyboard. His mind replayed Emily's words again and again. Deciding to wait to respond, he tossed his phone on the bed, running to the bathroom to brush his teeth and get ready for bed.
You need to get your life together, mate. Emily certainly put things into perspective. First things first, I need to end whatever mine and Zoe's relationship is. We can't keep doing what we are doing, that's for sure; it doesn't even make me happy. I don't even think it makes Zoe happy—it just fills a need; it's familiar and comfortable. But I don't love her anymore after everything we have been through since she left our marriage, coming back time and time again for it to end in flames. Emily said it best: "We are both fire, and we just make things combust when we are together." No wonder Gil was so frustrated that it happened again because she saw it for what it was: another fire in the making. I am truly and unquestioningly done. We both deserve someone to make us happy, and that is good for us. I need to talk to Zoe; do I do it tonight? Hey darling, thanks for bringing us this lucrative case, but after this, I'm done, and we both need to move on. Terrible bloody idea; wait until the case is settled and we have the money. Talk to her after the ink has dried.
Walking back into his bedroom, he looked down at his phone. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he stared down at his phone, preparing to type a message.
You're happier with her… But is she happier with you? Is this worth the risk?
'You add my name to any more fashion shows, and I'll tell Mr. Goldstein you're retracting your no dating clients policy just to go out with him.'
'Well, that's just cruel.'
He smiled reading the text, imagining her teasing smile from her remark.
'Emily was in charge of dinner, so you know it was five-star dining all around.'
'Soooo pizza?'
'How'd you know?'
'Lucky guess.'
'How was your night? Any excitement after your date with Elizabeth?'
He laid down in bed, waiting for her response, seeing the bubbles appear and disappear several times. His phone began to vibrate, showing a call from Gillian coming in. After answering it, he tried to speak but was quickly cutoff by her voice.
"It was not a date!" She laughed softly, hearing it, he smiled and chuckled along.
"No judgment if it was; you're allowed to explore your sexuality; it's very healthy."
"It was not a date! We got back into town, changed into clothes that were far less constraining, and went to a small hole-in-the-wall burger joint… that was surprisingly good."
"Not your style at all."
"Not particularly, but good food is good food. No judgment here." She laughed softly. "Once you get through everything- how she wants people to see her. And see her for who she truly is, she was great company."
"didn't make any moves?" He teased cheekily.
"Now I didn't say that." She laughed softly, causing him to laugh along with her. "I think both she and Perry are just lonely. Hard world they have entered."
"We would know a thing or two about that love."
"We would, wouldn't we?" The phone fell silent for a moment as he sat in bed, thinking about her words.
I never thought about it, but she is just as lonely as I am, isn't she?
"I should let you get some sleep; I don't want to keep you up… make you even more late than normal to work."
"I take offense to that!" he said with a smile.
"We are almost out of the woods now." He could hear a slight hesitation in her voice before she spoke, wishing he was better with voices like her.
"Once that check clears, we will be in the furthest we can be from the woods, darling. The company will be solidly in the green." The phone fell silent after he spoke.
"yeah… The company will be I ah, you… should get some sleep, Cal." She said the words so softly and hesitantly Cal struggled to hear her.
"night luv." She hung up, and Cal turned off the screen on his phone.
Did I say something wrong? That was odd. "We are almost out of the woods now." We are, meaning her and me…not the company. Is that her way of asking where we stand? Or am I just overthinking all of this?
The next day, Ca did his best to busy himself all morning; Perry and Elizabeth would be coming in around the end of business to sign closing documents. The morning had been nonstop; unable to even see Gillian yet; she was in back-to-back meetings with potential clients, having put them off due to the Lavi case.
He settled In a chair around the cube, his arm resting beneath his jaw as he hunched over, watching Torres talk with a client in the cube.
I'm so bloody tired; that's what happens when you can't sleep because you're overthinking everything. Out of the woods, why did that strike a cord? Finish the day, mate, get the check, end things with Zoe, and talk to Gillian. Feel her out; you've already felt her out. Stop thinking like that you need your head in the game. Since we started this case, I feel like we have had so many ups and downs; maybe that's what she meant by "are we out of the woods?" Finding out about her past—her drunkenly kissing me—that horrendous honest dinner… Are we out of the woods yet?
Loker sat next to him, looking over at him every few minutes and giving him a questioning look. Coughing lightly to draw Cal's attention.
"Yes Loker?" drawing his gaze from the cube to Loker, waiting for the younger man to say whatever he had been thinking for the past several minutes.
Torres excused herself from the cube, standing next to Loker.
"We got it right? He was lying; he never saw the suspect." Torres said looking between the two men.
"I feel like we got it awhile ago." Loker mumbled more to himself.
"Man's not lying about that." Cal said it firmly.
"What do you mean? He said- " Loker quickly said before being interrupted.
"Oh, he saw the suspect. Just not where he is saying he saw him. You think you two would be able to pick that up by now?" Leaning forward in his chair to get closer to Loker and Torres, he looks between the two.
"What am I missing? What am I not seeing?" Torres looked back at the cube, watching the man inside.
"It's not what you're not seeing. It's what he's saying; you've got to listen to his words as well. Fosta taught you two better things than I thought." Standing up from his chair, he pointed at the transcript of the interview on the screen. Loker and Torres bent down to look.
"I certainly thought I did." Gillian said, standing near the doorway with a coy smile. Wearing a soft cream sweater dress, the wide neckline hanging on to the edge of her shoulders, dipping down to a v. The waist of the dress tied with a matching belt nipping in dramatically at the waist. Walking to the group, her stilettos pulsating through the room.
"might ave to take the kids back to school." Cal toyed back, unable to hide the smile on his face from seeing her. She smiled back softly in return as he looked back at Torres and Loker, who pulled their eyes from the computer.
"Mr. Goldstein says that you both have been exceptional." She looked between the two younger employees proudly. "His office has been able to close double the number of cases since working with our office. You both should be quite proud of your work."
Torres and Loker both looked taken aback, grinning softly with pride.
"With that knowledge…I give you the benefit of the doubt that maybe you two were just impacted by the Hawthorne effect with Lightman's eyes on you today." Tilting her head, she looked between the two, who gave her a look of pure confusion.
"Screwin up because your boss is watching ya." Cal stated that he saw their confusion. "Usen terms they don't even know, I told ya they've got to go back to school, luv."
"Or… they have been doing great on their own, and you just make them nervous." She raised her brow at him with a smirk.
Looking away from his partner, he turned back to Torres and Loker, waving his finger between the two.
"Aight off you go, try not to screw it up this go round." He said clapping his hands together, then pointing to the cube. Torres rolled her eyes, turning around and heading to the cube as Loker sat back down at his computer.
Cal walked to the exit with Gillian behind him, opening the door for her as they walked out together.
"Meetings go well?" He asked nonchalantly.
"Really well, actually, they always go so much smoother when a certain scientist doesn't join." She teased, biting back a grin.
"You're saying I make things more difficult? Im hurt." He put his hand over his heart in a mock sign of sincerity.
"Oh, please, you hate meetings." They continued walking together as Cal stopped at his office door, holding it open for her as they entered.
"So what's the plan for the rest of the day?" he asked, sitting down at his desk.
"well… I have about three more meetings, and after that, I think Perry and Elizabeth should be arriving by then." She sat across from him.
"Three more bloody meetings?"
"What can I say? I'm very desirable today." Shrugging her shoulders lightly.
Today? Every bloody day, luv, every bloody day.
"Whens your next meeting start?" he reclined back in his chair casually.
"About thirty minutes, not enough time to grab a bite, so I guess I'm fasting today." She chuckled softly with a shake of her head.
You're happier with her.
Alright, mate, feel out the moment. You need to know if she wants more like you want more, and the only way you're going to really know is if you feel the moment out. Take the risk.
"How about this? …Because you have been so gracious in taking on all of these meetings that I would never have wanted to go to and would screw up if I did attend, mind you." She smiled wider at his words; he hesitated before continuing, suddenly feeling a wave of nervous energy run through him.
"Let's do dinna tonight, you and me; I'll even buy. You're going to be starving, and we need to celebrate closing the Lavi case." He held his hand out casually, trying to hide his nervousness from her.
She paused a moment to look at him carefully, looking away in thought, then back up to meet his gaze as she spoke.
"Are you sure you don't want to celebrate with Zoe?" The words flowed from her mouth without malice our judgment. Just soft and direct.
He could see the apprehension on her features, waiting for him to reply, and a slight hint of sadness in her eyes.
"I want to celebrate with my business partner and my best friend; they just so happen to be the same person….No one else."
"…okay." She looked away shyly with a coy smile to herself.
"And Zoe and me… it's done."
Ok, not the full truth yet, but it's about to be done once and for all after we talk.
"But… for how long?" she said in a soft, sad tone, sitting back in her chair and biting her lip back as she looked away.
Getting up from his chair, he walked over to the front of his desk to stand closer to her, resting his lower body against it.
"Forever. Me and her, it won't be happening again… This case was very revealing on a personal as well as a professional level. It made me realize some things I didn't want to admit." Rocking his body forward as he shoved his hands into his pocket.
"Emily also… might have made some rather fair points last night."
"And what did Emily have to say?"
"Well, the short version is that Zoe and me don't make each other happy, and we both deserve to be happy." He said it nonchalantly, shrugging his shoulders up.
"Your daughter has a way with words." She smiled softly at herself.
"You're rubbing off on her." He chuckled softly.
"This is a rather profound dissension you have settled on Cal. Are you sure you can really say forever? That you won't go back? It's not that I don't inherently like Zoe. It's just… I also just want you to be happy."
"Well, that's a bloody lie, not the wanting me to be happy bit. You mean that whole heartedly…but you definitely don't like Zoe darling… After what she said to you last week, you have every right."
"She has a right to her own feelings-"
"There you go, being the good girl again." He pointed at her face, arching his brow at her.
"You say that…but you don't know what I was thinking of doing after all was said and done after dinner," she mumbled quietly.
"What were you thinking of doing?" He quickly interrupted, seeing her cheeks flush after she spoke, her eyes darkened slightly. She brought her arm across her waist, hugging herself, as her other hand rose, letting her fingers cover her mouth. The gestures were to sooth and shush herself as a hint of embarrassment crept onto her face to match the faint blush.
Moving from his desk, he walked closer, looking down at her seated in her chair.
What happened after the dinner? I checked on her, we talked, "Do you want to come inside?" and that look. Holy shit, she was flirting, cheeky minx.
"I should head out to my next meeting." She got up quickly but was stopped by his hand on her upper arms, turning her around so that she was backed into his desk, unable to escape.
"Your next meeting isn't for another eight minutes, luv. And yes, I have been keeping track. What were you thinking of doing after dinner?" He pressed, getting closer into her personal space. She backed up as her back side pressed into the desk. Placing her hands on the table to brace herself, she closed her eyes for a moment, slowly opening them to look at him.
"If you must know, after all of her accusations at dinner, what Alec has said in the past… Knowing you and I have never done anything, part of me thought, Screw it. If you're going to keep accusing us of sleeping together…why not just do it?" Looking away shyly after she spoke, Cal could hear his own heart Beating out of his chest. Taking a step even closer to her, causing her body to angle back onto the desk even more.
"So when you said do you want to c-?" He said it huskily, unable to keep the desire from the features.
"It was just a passing thought, Cal," she interrupted, placing her hand on his chest and pushing softly, hoping he would move, but to no avail.
"A naughty thought." He added cheekily.
"Yes, it was; sometimes you get rather tired of playing the good girl roll." She smiled to herself, shaking her head. "Probably best the night ended like it did… it's not something you wanted."
Cal's mouth opened and closed several times in utter shock, speechless and unable to comprehend what he was hearing.
It's not something you wanted, shes not saying its something she didn't want. She wanted to. She still wants to, atleast part of her based on her dilated pupils. All that flirting—not just friendly flirting—she wanted more. Does she still? Or was it just in that moment?
"And if it was something you wanted… I know me, and I know I couldn't just do it once and pretend it didn't happen. You mean too much to me, and it's not like you want that kind of relationship." She rambled quickly.
Those words finally snapped him out of his thoughts, and hearing them felt like a gut punch.
"Who says I don't, darling?"
"Cal, you've been going through women like they are tissue, soft, and disposable. I couldn't handle that from you. You mean too much to me."
Moving his hand from her upper arm to the back of her neck, letting his thumb trail the side of her jaw.
"You think I would do that to you?"
"How could I not Cal?" Her eyebrows knitted together as she spoke, looking at him.
"Wait back up now; are you saying you do want to? meaning you and me?" He pointed back and forth between them.
"I…..I ah…. I've thought about it… Have you not?"
"Abso bloody lutely."
"Its…risky…we think of doing a lot of things that are risky doesn't mean we should do it-"
"Some things are worth the risk, luv."
"I don't want to get hurt by you, Cal. Not like that. If this is something we both want to try out….are sure you and Zoe done? If your not then there isnt even a point talking about this."
"Hand to God, we are done and over."
A loud knock at the door broke their eye contact, making them suddenly aware of their appearance. Gillian seated on his desk reclined back as Cals body was inches away. Cal quickly removed his hand from her and backed away as Gillian stood up and away from his desk.
"Doctor Foster, Mrs. Dunham is ready for you." Heidi announced, looking at Gillian with a nod.
"Thank you, Heidi; I'll be right there." Gillian smiled at the other woman, who left quickly. Walking to the door, Gillian turned around on her heels to watch Cal, who was staring at her intently.
"we will talk more later." She smiled shyly, reaching for the handle of the door.
"It's a date!" he called out with a cheesy grin as she left his office.