TW: descriptions of smut from the last chapter, some emotionally distressing themes, swearing.
Thank you so much to everyone who has been supporting this story!

Back on that same old bullshit cycle. Days turning into weeks, and weeks turning into nearly three months…

Three months since I've seen or heard from Miguel.

I sat on my fire escape, nursing a particularly nasty bruise on my arm I got from stopping a burglary. Asshole got me good with a crowbar, whacking me with it several times as I blocked it from hitting my face. Like goddamn, why couldn't I get regenerative powers like the other Spider people? My cuts and bruises always seemed to hang around.

Apollo snored beside me (surprisingly), enjoying his time in the sun before it set too much. I never expected my neighbor's cat to keep me company, considering this little bastard never really liked me that much.

At least I'm not completely alone, right? I've got a cat that semi-hates me right here! That sounded so pathetic. I was getting out more, making more public appearances, even let some teenagers take selfies with me for their social media. I was supposed to be the "friendly" neighborhood Spider Woman after all, and these past months I've been severely lacking in that department.

Maybe the radioactive spider I was bitten by was a brown recluse or something, because all I ever wanted to do was hide away in my little corner in the world. I was really starting to come out of my shell and make friends when I was in Nueva York, but of course like so many other things in my life, it was taken away and not meant to be.

Nearly three months since I've seen Miguel, or Hobie, Jess, Peter…

I thought about how Miguel had made love to me. Well, maybe I should just call it "fucking" since he pretty much one-night-standed my ass. Yeah, he fucked me twice in my apartment, paid my rent, then bailed. So much for taking care of me like he said he would.

"Fucking liar…" I mumbled to myself, resting my head on my arms, crossed over my knees that were pulled up to my chest.

Apollo stirred in his sleep beside me. Oh how wonderful life would be if I was a cat, instead I was trapped as a spider.

My mind often wandered back to me and Miguel in my bed. He has been so attentive and patient, he seemed like he genuinely cared about me. If I knew he was going to just leave and not check in again I would've preferred if he just dropped me off and left. Now I'm plagued with the memory of how amazing having sex with him felt, and I have to sometimes masturbate myself to sleep.

I groaned, feeling sexually frustrated and annoyed that none of the songs I was listening to with my mp3 player were connecting very well with me today. I adjusted my earbuds and turned up the volume, trying to drown out the noise of the outside world.

A shoeless child on a swing

Reminds you of your own again

She took away your troubles

Oh, but then again she left pain

This emo song droned into my ears, making me feel sadder than I did before. Then again, I did often listen to sad music when I felt sad, but I don't think that was really helping me but stay in a moping mess right now.

I stood up, startling Apollo out of his restful sleep. He hissed at me and dashed up the fire escape toward his apartment.

"Damn, I thought we had something." I called up to the angry bastard.

Stupid cat.

I crawled back into my apartment through the window, tossing my mp3 player and earbuds on my desk. My apartment was becoming a bit messy again. I was keeping it clean the first couple weeks when I thought Miguel was coming back, but once again I lost motivation. What was the point?

I dragged myself toward the bathroom, closing the door a crack behind me as I prepared to get into the shower, cradling my bruised arm. I opened the cabinet under my sink, ripping out a clean towel quickly, in the process I knocked something out from under the sink. I bent over to pick it up, seeing that it was a case of sanitary napkins and tampons. I moved to put them back then paused, realizing something strange. Kneeled by the open cabinet I studied the packaging, my brain reeling from when I bought these.

I bought them four months ago, and neither case had been opened.

Hold up, wait a second.

My hands began to tremble, perhaps my body was piecing things together faster than my lagging brain could. I sprinted out of the bathroom toward my calendar that was hanging by my bed. I went through the months, not seeing any 'X' I would have drawn on any dates recently.

"Holy shit." My voice was shaky as the realization was flooding my senses all at once.

I hadn't gotten my period in literal months.

Now that I was thinking about it, my appetite and mood has been all over the place. And I had been throwing up some mornings, unable to eat breakfast as I did sometimes. I wanted to rip my hair out, there was no way. No fucking way.

I left my apartment hastily, running downstairs and out of the building. I found the nearest bodega that carried pregnancy tests. I went inside, nervous as hell as I grabbed three different types of tests, my body running on autopilot. I grabbed a big jug of apple juice along with the tests, knowing I had to produce a lot of pee in the next couple hours. The cashier cocked an eyebrow at me as they rang up my items. I couldn't even muster an awkward smile back, I'm sure I looked scared as hell.

I ran out of the store with my bag and back to my building. If there was no one around I totally would have scaled up the side to my building or used my webs, but the streets still had so many people as the sun was setting. I ran up my building's stairs, clinging on to my bag for dear life, and finally made it back into my apartment.

I opened the jug of apple juice and immediately started to chug, hoping it would fill up my bladder soon.

I sat on the toilet, reading the box of instructions over and over again.

Step one: Remove the test stick from the wrapper and take off the cap.

Step two: Place the absorbent tip in your urine stream for 5 seconds. Or, if you prefer, dip into a urine sample collected in a clean, dry container for 5 or 20 seconds, depending on the test you're using.

Step three: Keep the absorbent tip pointing downwards throughout the testing process – i.e., never turn the stick with the absorbent tip pointing upwards.

Step four: Replace the cap and lay the stick flat.

Step five: Wait for 1 – 3 minutes according to the instructions for the test you are using.

Step six: Read the results. The instruction leaflet will tell you how to interpret your result and any next steps you should follow.

Too many damn steps. And of course the stupid test said it's better not to drink too much liquid before the test because it could dilate hcG levels. Dammit, I don't know what I'm doing at all.

"A line means pregnant, even a faint line means positive." I read aloud on the box.

My test was on the sink, I waited for the results, now pacing back and forth. I looked in the mirror, lifting up my shirt so I could study my stomach. I didn't look any bigger, did I? Maybe it was too early for me to show, or I wasn't pregnant at all.

I waited an extra two minutes, too scared to even look. I leaned over the test, holding my breath as I studied it.

There was a line.

My heart felt like it was going to explode. I had chills all over, my knees nearly buckled. I didn't want to accept it yet, maybe I was in denial but I went ahead and took the other two tests.

Waiting for the results was agonizing, my mind moved a million miles per hour. The words "false positive" repeated in my mind, but if only I'd be so lucky. I waited an extra minute for the results, not wanting to check the tests on the sink again right away.

They all showed positive.

"Oh, fuck me!" I cursed, kicking over my little bathroom trash can.

What the hell was I supposed to do now? I took out my phone and googled what to do next when finding something like this out. Some nearby hospitals and doctors offices popped up.

I made an appointment at an urgent care clinic, wanting an "official" positive from a doctor. They could give me some guidance on what to do next. I was at a total loss on how to navigate the next few months now. It's not like I had a family I could ask for help, or knew anyone in my universe that would lend a hand. I was by myself, and I had no idea how I could contact anyone in the Spider Society. I felt absolutely helpless.

The clinic was packed. It took a long time for them to call my name. I filled out some paperwork and they gave me a plastic cup to pee in. I was worried I had emptied my bladder enough before this, but I managed to get enough out for them to use. They also drew some blood to test.

Their tests also came back positive. The clinic doctor, a shorter middle aged woman with a ponytail and salmon pink scrubs entered the room I sat in and informed me.

"Well, you're definitely pregnant." She looked at my paperwork. She seemed tired and harried, dark circles under her eyes. "It says it's been three months since your last period?"

"Yes…" I reply, weakly.

"An ultrasound with an OB-GYN will be needed to determine how far along you are and if everything is developing as it should. If you plan on keeping the baby you should start taking prenatal vitamins right away. I'm going to give you some brochures to help you choose the best options that work for you." She stated very matter-of-factly, writing down notes quickly on her clipboard.

I sat in stunned silence, still trying to wrap my head around what was happening.

"We can't be sure how far along you are yet, but judging by your last cycle I would say you're around fourteen weeks." She continued on.

" "Fourteen weeks?"" I echoed, shocked.

"Yes, you may be entering your second trimester."

Second trimester, and I just found out I was pregnant. When and how was I going to tell Miguel?!

"Here are those brochures, and let us know if you need anything else."

I think I thanked her, I barely remember what happened next. Everything was a whirlwind. I stood on the curb outside of the clinic, holding a little bag of stuff they gave me. I barely noticed that it was dark outside now.

I don't know how I made it back to my apartment, but I did. I sat on my bed, not muttering a single word as I stared at my walls, subconsciously cradling my bruised arm again. The corners of my eyes stung with tears that I quickly blinked away.

"What am I supposed to do now?" I said aloud to no one.

Should I figure out a way to get back to Nueva York, or should I just pack up my shit and disappear? This wasn't how my life was supposed to go, this wasn't how Miguel and I's relationship was meant to end up. Part of me wondered where I would even go, I hadn't really lived anywhere outside my city before, and it's not like I had the money to move anyway.

I remembered what Miguel told me, that he kept tabs on me to make sure I was safe. I would have to do something drastic to get his attention, but at the moment I wasn't sure what I should do.

Maybe it was time to let myself go and be a bit dramatic.

Miguel's perspective

These last three months had been particularly harrowing. This kid turned out to be Spider Man, who he wasn't supposed to be. His actions had caused a domino effect and unintentionally created a villain that had the potential to destroy everything he was working on holding together. Maybe it was against his better judgment, but he sent his friend Gwen after the villain they were calling "Spot."

He had decided to invite the kid, Jess suggested that easing him into the canon event explanation would prevent more from being disrupted, or better yet keep him here for now and say nothing at all. Dealing with time was so complicated, staring at these virtual screens for hours on end was hurting his eyes.

"Hey, Miguel." Lyla materialized beside him.

"What is it?" He asked, rubbing his eyes.

"You should see this." She drew his attention to a screen.

On top of a bridge, way up on the tower portion, were two people. One was a man dressed in a ski mask, looking a bit rough and scared out of her mind. And the other was her dressed in her Spider suit, holding onto him on the edge like she was going to drop him.

"What the hell is she doing?" Miguel demanded to Lyla.

"I don't know, but it sounds like she's requesting an audience."

Miguel pinched the bridge of his nose. It was never ending. He knows he messed up, instead of openly communicating he had been avoiding her, something that he knew was wrong, but he didn't know how to properly sever attachments from others.

"Sooo…" Lyla interjected into the silence.

"I'll go get her." He answered.

"Okay, just be gentle with her, Miguel. You haven't exactly handled that situation very well."

Miguel waved her off, opening a portal to her world.

He stepped onto the bridge. It was dark and breezy; the water from way below was pitch black. He could hear a man yelling from higher up on the bridge tower, and recognized her voice yelling back at him. He sighed to himself, shooting his web to the top so he could see what was going on.

"The fuck are you doing, lady?! Just get me down from here, you crazy bitch!" The man held onto her arm, kicking and writhing from her grasp.

"You know the more you fight, the greater the chance I'll drop you, right? Just sit tight, I'm waiting for someone." She replied, tersely.

"What the fuck that's gotta do with me?" He snapped.

"It's just your unlucky day, maybe you shouldn't have been trying to break open an ATM!"

The tower wasn't big enough to hold three of them, so Miguel climbed up the side, popping his head up to see what was going on.

"Sunshine, what are you doing?" Miguel asked.

"Jesus, there's more of you?!" The man shouted, aghast. He fought more against her grip.

"Hold still, I won't be able to hold you!" She snapped at him, her grip loosening from how much he was squirming.

The man balled up his fist and hit her arm. Little did he know he hit where she was bruised. She let go, a knee-jerk reaction that wasn't intentional. The man fell, screaming in terror on the way down. She leapt down after him, but Miguel was way ahead of her, he shot his web out to catch him before he was splattered on the concrete bridge below.

Miguel leapt down to the bottom, joining her as he released his web hold on the man with the blades from his Spider suit. The man ran off, scared out of his mind.

"Let him go, he was punished enough." Miguel told her, his hands on his hips. "Are you going to tell me what that was about?"

She was rubbing her arm, avoiding eye contact, even with her mask on he could tell.

"How else am I supposed to reach you?" She muttered.

"Not by almost killing someone!" Miguel gestured in the direction the man ran away. "What were you thinking?"

"What was I supposed to do?! You told me you were going to take care of me and left me again months without a word!"

Miguel sighed, knowing this was going to happen. Her tone sounded so broken, he could hear it faltering as she shouted. It made him sad hearing her so upset.

"I know you're upset, but I was keeping tabs just as I said. I wouldn't let anything happen to you." Miguel replied.

She scoffed, shaking her head: "Maybe trying to get a hold of you was a mistake. You won't listen to reason." She crossed her arms, turning away from him.

"I am listening now, what do you want to tell me?" Miguel approached her, putting a hand on her shoulder.

She swatted it off, keeping her back toward him.

"I know that I messed up, I really did. I shouldn't be keeping you in the dark. I've just got a lot going on, and I didn't know how to approach you again. I told you I'm not safe-"

"Bullshit." She clipped. "You used me."

"No! No, it wasn't like that." Miguel tried to put another hand on her shoulder, but she jerked away. "I know what it looks like, but it wasn't like that at all."

"You know what, just forget it. I don't know why I even tried." She started to leave.

"Wait-" Miguel caught her arm, she yelped in pain, causing him to recoil.

"Fuck you, Miguel!" She cried, shoving him harshly.

Miguel chased after her, the two of them swinging around the city. He knew she'd be upset, but this wasn't like her. He chased her all the way to her apartment. She lifted the window, and jumped inside. She removed her Spider hood, throwing it on the ground. He made his own hood un-materialize as he entered through her window.

"Just leave me the fuck alone!" She tried to stomp toward the bathroom, but he blocked her.

"What's going on? Just talk to me!"

"You've abandoned me again, what is there to talk about? You had sex with me then just discarded me!"

Tears streaked her face, he felt his heart pang guiltily. He had really broken her heart, something he wanted to avoid, but always ended up being inevitable for him. This wasn't the first time he had broken a woman's heart, he's had this conversation a number of times before.

"It wasn't like that-" Miguel reached for her face to wipe away her tears, but she tried to fight him off.

She eventually stopped struggling, burying her face into his chest and sobbing. He held her, making circle motions on her back with his hand. He felt like the biggest asshole in the universe, and in hindsight he probably was. He rested his chin on the top of her head as he held her. His mind was screaming internally for him to stop, knowing that getting close to her was dangerous, but his heart yearned for her more than anything. He couldn't keep hurting her like this.

"I'm so sorry, mi vida. I haven't been treating you fairly." He cooed.

He pulled her back gently to wipe her tears away and observe her. She was glowing. He had always found her pretty, but she was absolutely radiant right now, even with a face swollen from crying. Now that he was studying her, her body looked different too. Her hips were wider, she looked curvier than before, and her breasts were definitely larger - it looked like they were going to burst open the front of her Spider suit. He thought maybe his memory of her had been warped, or that he missed her so much that he was getting a bit too excited.

He could feel himself start to get hard within his own Spider suit, feeling ashamed that he would even think of that while she was upset, but he couldn't help it. He was so drawn to her, and that's exactly what scared him to death.

"You're so beautiful…" he heard himself say aloud, cupping her face.

She looked up at him with tearful eyes. He wasn't trying to "woo" her frustration away, she had every right to be angry with him. She seemed to soften with his words, a calmness washing over her demeanor.

"Why didn't you come back?" She asked, her voice barely a whisper.

"Because I was scared. I'm falling for you and that terrifies me." He confessed.

His heightened senses made it so he could hear her heartbeat quicken. His own face flushed from his words, but it was true. He leaned in slowly, testing to see if she would let him kiss her. To his surprise she did. He started to remove her Spider suit, pulling it off of her shoulders. Her breasts were spilling out of her bra like it was too small for her. It drove him crazy, the sight of her always drove him crazy. He groped at her breast, he saw her wince slightly and pulled his hand back. They felt so much more swollen than he remembered, so many things about her seemed different, she even smelled different.

He noticed the large bruise on her arm: "Are you okay?" He asked her, rubbing his thumb gently over her arm.

"No, no I'm really not." She admitted, the question seemed to bring the tears back to her eyes.

"Tell me what's going on, it's okay."

She looked up at Miguel again, her eyes fearful. She turned and walked over to her bed, her Spider suit half on, and picked up a bag that was on her bed.

"I don't know what to do and I'm so scared. I'm scared of you leaving me again and scared of what's going to happen to me." She explained as she brought the bag over to Miguel.

"I won't leave you again, I promise this time. I've been so worried about keeping things in order that I think I'm losing sight of what's in front of me."

His promises sounded empty to her. She handed him a paper from the bag, he took it, furrowing his brows as he read it.

"I'm pregnant."

Reader's perspective

I watched Miguel, he froze when the words escaped my lips. His eyes widened, glued to the paper from the doctor that was full of medical jargon. Waiting for him to respond was one of the most agonizingly long minute's of my life. My mind was racing, what would he think? Was he thinking of Gabriella? Was he angry at me? Did he actually mean what he said this time?

I was still angry at him, in fact I was a bit enraged. I know he could sense it, he was hesitant to touch me even though I knew he wanted to. I wanted so badly to pull away from him kissing me, but he felt so good and I felt at peace with him around me. Maybe it's twisted, how forgiving women can be when we're hurt over and over again… not that I have fully forgiven him, but I longed for how attentive he was being; how his eyes roamed by body; how he held me and called me by my name and "mi vida." His usual brooding attitude evaporated around me, I was exposed to a different side of him that I loved.

This man made me delusional, like I can't believe I dangled a criminal over a bridge to get his attention. What in The Notebook was going on in my strange life?

He cleared his throat, I could see him trying to control his hands from trembling as he held the paper.

"How-when… are you sure?" He stuttered, unable to form a coherent sentence.

I have never seen him so flustered before, even more so than when we had sex. I could only nod in response, my hand gripping my abdomen. He looked like he was going to faint, stumbling back slightly, his eyes darting around my apartment.

"Miguel?"

His attention went back to me, he dropped the paper and closed the distance between us. He took my hands, I could feel him shaking (and honestly I think I was too). He looked so panicked, I mirrored his expression. Even so he still hasn't said anything else.

"Please say something," I pleaded. "I know this is a lot to take in, but I'm so scared. I can't do this by myself or make this big of a decision by myself. You've been a parent, you know what to do, right?"

My nervousness was making me ramble, probably not a good time to bring up him being a parent. His grip tightened around my hands, not in anger but a squeeze in support. He pulled me into a hug, his hand cradling the back of my head.

"We're going to figure it out." He finally managed to say.

This Night Has Opened My Eyes - Steven Patrick Morrissey (The Smiths)

Notes:

I had to dig out an old pregnancy test box from under my own bathroom cabinet for the directions from when I had my last scare myself lol, steps are from Clearblue.

Miguel is a super messy character in the comic, so I am bringing some of those elements into this story lol. This story was originally supposed to be more of a slow burn with intimacy and the pregnancy coming later, but it just kind of ended up this way. Now Miguel and y/n have more to navigate other than where they stand in their relationship - much more drama to come!