For the next few days, May tried to devote all of her energy to the PML rather than worrying about her social skills. The rounds of the PML followed one another, and May and her friends had to work hard as a team. Sometimes her most loyal teammates took a day off, but as the captain, May felt she had to be there every day to take care of the new members of the team, which grew bigger and bigger with the new battles.
After Clair and Lorelei, they first had to face Viola and Bugsy, bug type specialists whom May and her friends had defeated without too much difficulty thanks to her Blaziken and Flint's Infernape. Then came Nanu and Grimsley, two powerful trainers with dark Type Pokemons that Brendan and Wally had successfully eliminated. Their last victory had been against Koga and his daughter. Their poison Type Pokemons had almost overcome May's Blaziken. This time, she had chosen to call on Hau and Clair to battle them, and the woman's rage combined with Hau's paralyzing moves had finally allowed them to triumph.
"See May? I told you you would need me in your team!" Clair reminded her proudly.
After each battle, May and her teammates had now become accustomed to greeting and congratulating their opponents. Brendan took this opportunity to offer them the chance to join their team. To the surprise of the young champion, the trainers often accepted the proposal with humility, eager to continue in competition a little longer. So, lately, trainers like Viola, Nanu, and even Koga, whom she only knew by name in the past, had joined them. Their team now numbered a dozen members. At this rate, there would be more members among them than in all the remaining PML teams so May wondered if that wasn't becoming a bit of a cheat... but since the rules allowed it and everyone seemed happy, she didn't want to refuse anyone. Their next opponents were Phoebe's team, and her teammates Acerola and Agatha, all three battling with ghost type Pokemon. May was apprehensive about this battle because ghost type Pokemons had always scared her a little, they were specially unpredictable during battles. It was such a mysterious type and aside from Nanu and her Persian, she didn't have anyone on her team who could make their Pokemon's type work in their favor.
Luckily, the contest organizers had instituted a week-long hiatus in the tournament to give the teams still participating some time to relax, therefore May was spending that time thinking about different strategies her team could use against Phoebe and her friends. Meanwhile, Brendan and Wally were busy coaching the new members of their team so May didn't see them much anymore. She liked to spend part of her days alone with her Blaziken, imagining different battles scenarios in her notebook. In the afternoons, she would meet up with the newest members of her team, to get to know them better and observe their way of battling.
Today, she had found Nanu, Koga, and Clair. Cooperating with them was easier than she had feared, even though the three trainers certainly had a lot more battle experience than her since they were all older, they didn't question her role as a team captain and took all her remarks seriously. She even found herself enjoying those training times with them, without Brendan and her other friends constantly teasing her. All the trainers who had joined them had the same desire to give the best of themselves, and the goal to always learn new things in training.
A long time ago, Steven had spoken to her about this, that special glimmer that trainers had in their eyes, which he claimed to have noticed in hers right away. Now, May understood better what he meant by that. She observed this spark in the members of her team during their training, they were all so enthusiastic and determined... She had also discovered it in the eyes of the former champion, since his comeback. Perhaps the joy of life in the people around her struck her so much because she couldn't really feel it in herself anymore. The passion for training. For her, Pokemon battles had almost become a kind of puzzle to solve. Each new duel was like an exam she had to pass at all costs. She couldn't find this special glimmer anymore. Sometimes, she even wondered if it had ever been there.
The more May became aware of this distance between her and her teammates, the more their presence became burdensome for her. To the point where she intentionally avoided Brendan, Wally, and Lisia for a few hours, just as she always avoided Steven, all of this to avoid facing her own confusion. She couldn't quite define it but to reassure herself, she told herself it was probably due to tiredness and that it would go away, eventually. But it was a persistent feeling, sometimes making her want to run away, escape from this island, leave without saying anything to anyone, just like Steven had done, to find some serenity, alone.
But instead, she had to constantly put on a neutral mask. She couldn't open up to anyone about it, anyway; she didn't know who would have been able to understand what she was feeling.
This evening, after her training session with Clair, Nanu, and Koga, May returned early to the Pokemon center while the others hung out at the beach together. Their battle against Phoebe's team was scheduled for the next day, and May wanted to be in the best shape. In the large room upstairs, which served as a dining hall for all the guests of the center, she looked around for Brendan, Wally, or Lisia, but obviously, the three of them were still training or having fun (as they often did together) with Flannery, Flint, and Hau. That wasn't that bad, she could just eat alone quickly and go straight to her room to rest.
However, Phoebe spotted her just as she was about to sit at an empty table and waved at her warmly.
"May? Come on, join us for dinner!"
Phoebe was only accompanied by Glacia. As it had been a while since May had interacted with her mates from the Hoenn league, she decided to sit at their table after getting her dinner.
"Hi you two!"
"Hi May! Let's say this is our friendship meal before tomorrow," Phoebe smiled, raising her glass. "May the best team win, alright?"
"Yeah, the best team," May agreed, following suit.
"So, one of your teams will bid farewell to the tournament tomorrow...?" Glacia deduced, looking thoughtful. "I wonder who will come out on top."
"Even though May has defeated me in the past, this time, I have powerful partners who are highly motivated to eliminate a Pokemon league champion..."
"Are you trying to scare me or something?" May smiled, though she did not appreciate the idea of a team specifically aiming to eliminate her from the competition, even if she managed to hide it.
"No, I'm informing you… That's all!"
May found nothing to reply to that; she wasn't very skilled at impressing people outside of a Pokemon battle. The three trainers began to eat. The previously calm dining hall was slowly filling up with new trainers. May kept an eye on the door, waiting for Brendan and the rest of her team to arrive. Young children came running in to claim one of the last available tables, accompanied by their energetic Pokemons. Then a couple of seniors arrived, followed by three men she recognized immediately. May quickly averted her gaze and pretended to focus intensely on her bowl of salad.
Steven, Wallace, and Drake stopped in the middle of the hall, looking for an available table with a bored expression. Despite herself, May inwardly prayed that they wouldn't notice them, but her pleas were shattered when Phoebe stood up to get their attention. Out of the corner of her eye, the young champion saw them approaching inexorably and swallowed hard.
"Oh it's nice to see you here, Glacia, Phoebe, May..." Wallace exclaimed with his usual cheerfulness. "Mind if we join you?"
"With pleasure," the ice Type elite 4 replied.
"Wonderful! I'll just grab a chair; I'll be right back. You guys go ahead and sit," Wallace said to Drake and Steven.
And of course, the man in question had to end up sitting just in front of her. Fate never seemed to be in her favor since she arrived in Pasio.
"May," the former champion said kindly as he settled down next to her.
She hurriedly swallowed the leaf of salad that was scratching her palate to answer:
"Hi, Steven..."
Her voice sounded a bit strained, but well, it's not like she was still trying to make a good impression in front of him. They hadn't spoken since May had rejected his help a few weeks ago, after going to see Cynthia and Lance. Steven had probably come to understand that it was really what May wanted: to be left alone.
"It's nice to meet some friends from Hoenn here," Wallace said as he returned with a plate of tomato pasta. "Champion May, it's been a long time since we last saw each other," he added teasingly.
"That's true," she acknowledged, with a forced smile.
"Wallace," Phoebe chuckled softly, "you know May doesn't like being called champion."
"If only Wallace would listen to half of what we tell him…" Steven interjected in front of her, giving her a knowing look, but May wasn't able to react to it.
Well, perhaps Steven hadn't understood anything, actually, as he was still trying relentlessly to get her attention. It would have been much easier to ignore him if he hadn't been so kind to her since she returned. But May was determined not to let his charm touch her anymore.
"Oh, calm down, Steven!" Wallace replied, giving him an falsely offended look. "My memory starts failing after a day of intense training with you... It's entirely your fault."
"So, are you all ready for tomorrow?" Glacia asked, seeming eager to cut short their teasing.
"After so many hours of work... I believe we are," sighed Wallace. "This time, we're competing against Alder and Iris."
"The former and the new champions of Unova," Drake added, seeing May's puzzled expression. "That's why Steven insisted on pushing us to our limits today."
"Oh, I see," May said softly, though honestly, she wasn't sure what the two Unova champions looked like.
"You two talk as if I forced you," Steven pointed out, "but I'm not the only one who wants to win this battle, right?"
"Of course not," Wallace acknowledged, "but you have more at stake than we do... For you, it's primarily a matter of honor, isn't it?"
"No, it's no longer about honor," Steven corrected him. "I consider myself a trainer like any other since I lost my champion title. And honestly, I prefer it that way."
May looked up at his words. What do you mean? She wanted to ask. Was being a champion also difficult for him? She instantly wondered. Steven had never taken the time to talk to her about his experience; in fact, she had no idea how he had felt when he took up the role of champion. If he had experienced the same doubts, the same pressure that she now had to bear, or if he had always been confident enough to never question himself.
"And you, Phoebe, who will be your next opponents?" Drake asked.
"May and her team," she replied with a mischievous smile.
"Oh, so it seems that we're all going to have formidable battles tomorrow," Wallace said.
"Indeed," Glacia said, "Only the toughest teams are left now."
"And we're all part of these! Without boasting, it's not surprising," the gym leader joked.
The three members of the elite 4 laughed at the comment. May was only half listening to the conversation, mostly ensuring she maintained her gaze at a certain height, avoiding eye contact with Steven Stone. She did her best to make him believe she paid no attention to him, but in reality even without looking at him, she felt overwhelmed by his presence. It seemed she could smell the characteristic scent of fresh earth and clean laundry that followed the young man everywhere. And she could almost hear his calm breathing despite all the noise in the room. Despite her efforts, Steven's aura always managed to reach her.
"...as it has been agreed that the Hoenn league will reopen no later than October."
"That gives you some time after the end of the PML... I suppose you'll need it."
May had lost track of the conversation, but the word league caught her attention like a magnet. Glacia was explaining to Wallace how the Pokemon Alliance had granted them permission to close the Hoenn League during the PML.
"I'm glad the Alliance made an exception, the PML wouldn't have been the same without you," Steven said.
The young champion spared a quick glance at him, wondering if the compliments were meant for all the members of the league or if it was just another attempt to flatter her. How did he dare to give his opinion on this precise subject?
"Yes, that's very fortunate," Drake agreed, looking at Steven with bitterness. "It's not like we could count on you for a potential replacement... The league could have collapsed, and you wouldn't have lifted a finger. Maybe you wouldn't have even known."
The remark left a chill around the table, and the trainers seemed to await Steven's reaction. However, he didn't say a word. This time, May raised her head to discover that the former champion was showing a sheepish face.
"But the league did just fine without him, thanks to May who immediately stepped up to her new role," Glacia smiled, as she was used to tempering conflicts.
"I never doubted that for a second," Steven finally said in a less clear voice than usual, his gaze fixed on his plate.
May almost felt sorry for him. Almost. Finally, someone dared to confront him about his cowardice, and it didn't surprise her that this person was Drake. Maybe his reproaches, combined with the insinuations she had sent his way, would make him realize that he couldn't get away with it like that: abandoning them and then coming back a year later as if he had done nothing wrong. May, at least, wouldn't accept that.
"You know, over the years, I find that the trainers who come to challenge the league are getting younger and younger," Glacia said, to drive the conversation to a less sensitive topic. "The new generation has many exceptional trainers. May is not the only example."
"Yes, that's true, and there's also a lot of talk about three young trainers from Kanto; they say they all have exceptional skills, especially that boy, with a cap..."
"Red," Drake helped. "An amazing young man, indeed. He doesn't waste time chatting, maybe that's why he became so strong despite his young age."
Until the end of the meal, perhaps out of fear of receiving more reproaches, Steven didn't intervene much in the conversation. For once, May wasn't the only one feeling uncomfortable. She hesitated to make a sign to her table companion because, even though he deserved to be put back in his place, she didn't really enjoy seeing him closed off like this. Even though she felt closer to this version of Steven, deep down she still preferred the Steven with the bright and carefree gaze, even if that Steven didn't care how he treated her.
It was a relief when the elite four finally got up from the table, and May followed suit. They all took the elevator together until they reached the 4th floor, where Wallace, Drake, and Steven got out. After saying their goodbyes, May felt her heart become a little lighter.
"We've reached the 5th floor, Phoebe, aren't you coming?" Glacia asked when the elevator opened again.
"No, I still need to have a few words with Acerola about tomorrow," Phoebe explained.
"Oh okay! See you later then. Good night, May."
May bid farewell to Glacia, and as the elevator finally reached the 5th floor, Phoebe also got off with her.
"By the way, May... Well, this probably isn't the right moment to ask, but..."
Surprised by her colleague's hesitant attitude, May stopped.
"No, tell me?"
"Is something wrong, May? You were so quiet throughout dinner... you seemed preoccupied."
She was being observed more than she realized. After Lisia, now Phoebe was needlessly worrying about her.
"No, everything's fine, don't worry. I was just thinking about our battle tomorrow..."
Phoebe didn't seem convinced. Perhaps she knew May better than she thought.
"You're still very angry with Steven, aren't you? You barely even answer to him when he talks you."
"I don't know what you're talking about," May replied with all the insincerity she could express.
Phoebe gave a slight smile.
"You're not very good at acting, you know... But seriously, May, I know Steven Stone's bad habits are a kind of sensitive topic in the league, but since I'm the newest member of the elite four, I'll pretend I didn't know and talk to you honestly. Drake, Glacia, Sidney, and I, even though we've never directly addressed this with you, we all know how you must have felt when he left. You know, when I became a member of the elite four, I was completely lost, feeling like I wasn't up to the task, that I would never make it... So becoming the champion... I can't imagine how tough it must have been for you to take that title without his support."
May leaned against the wall, arms crossed. She didn't expect Phoebe to be so frank with her. Despite all the time that had passed, she wasn't sure if she was ready to discuss the past with her.
"Steven behaved badly; we all agree on that. But deep down, May, you know he didn't want to leave you alone. It wasn't about you... And he knew you would make it without him, that we would be there to help you... and look, he was right!"
Phoebe was defending him, loyal to her former colleague. How could she ask May not to take it personally when she had been the first to suffer the consequences of her predecessor's departure? Whether he cared for her or not, the result was the same. It was so easy to say that he knew she would make it without him now that the future had proven him right. How could he be so sure back then? Yes, she had made it through, but it would have been a thousand times easier if he had been there for her. May wouldn't be as exhausted as she was today.
"I can't help but resent him," she replied softly. "I wish I weren't like this, but I can't stop feeling hurt... angry..."
She was surprised that she could be so honest with Phoebe despite her desire to avoid the conversation.
"But it's sad that you two don't talk anymore. You should try to tell him your feelings... I don't think he realizes how much he hurt you."
"I don't want him to know."
"Why not?"
"I don't know... It just makes me too uncomfortable."
Phoebe frowned.
"But it won't get better until you can talk to him," she insisted. "I'm sure it could help... Do you really want to stay angry with him forever? If you're this hurt, it's because you care a lot about him, deep down."
May was tempted to contradict her, but just as she was about to speak, the elevator doors opened again, and Bugsy and Viola stepped out, their faces beaming, engaged in a lively conversation.
"Hello, goodnight!" they called out as they passed.
"Goodnight to both of you," Phoebe replied with a big smile.
She turned back to May, her expression turning serious again.
"Well, I don't think the center's hallways are the most suitable place for deep conversations... I'm going to join Acerola, May. I hope you'll consider what I've said..."
"Alright..." May sighed, relieved to be done with this discussion. "See you tomorrow then?"
"See you tomorrow, May!"