Luz's second summer in the Boiling Isles was drawing to a close. It had been an absolutely sensational time. She'd danced at Grom with the most beautiful witch in the world, dueled the ambassador from THE REALMS FROM BEYOND THE SHADOWS to a draw (in Luz's defense, the asshole would not stop hitting on her mothers), and solved an ancient riddle that led to a long hidden treasure. And, sure, the treasure ended up only having historical, not intrinsic, value, but she'd gotten some great bonding time in with Willow and her datemate Vee during the quest for it, and that was worth more than gold.
But in two weeks, Luz would be back on Earth, back to the daily grind of school. She had been hopeful that Camila would change her mind about the necessity of her returning to high school. After all, Camila now had two partners on the Boiling Isles and she herself was learning magic. But Camila was just as steadfast in her decision as she had been before. Luz could understand the logic behind it. She just didn't like it.
Still, it wouldn't be as bad as the last time she left the Boiling Isles. Back then, she'd been consumed with worry that Camila wouldn't take well to the earthshaking revelations Luz was about to lay upon her. She'd been terrified that she was saying goodbye to her friends, and especially to Amity, for good. But that worry had proven completely unfounded. This year, Luz didn't have that worry dragging her down. She knew that she would return to the Boiling Isles.
"You're sheepgathering again," Eda pointed out to Luz as these thoughts raced through her head.
Luz let out a nervous laugh. It was true. She was woolgathering. "Am I? Yeah, I guess I'm trying to distract myself from tonight."
Eda gave Luz's hand a tight squeeze. "It's going to be okay, you know that, right? Just remember my warnings and you'll get through the night just fine."
The Boiling Isles wasn't the only part of the Demon Realm. It was just the safest part of it, which definitely said something about how dangerous those other realms were. Even during Belos' regime, the Boiling Isles mostly kept a cautious distance from their neighbors. THE REALMS FROM BEYOND THE SHADOWS may have been dangerous (at least, it was assumed as much from what little was known about them), but they paled in comparison to the Fae Realms.
The Fae Realms were split up between the Unseelie and the Seelie fae, and both of the factions were perpetually fighting for dominance, through direct and indirect warfare. For thousands of years, they had exactly and precisely canceled each other out, leading to war without end. Though the Seelie had an image of benevolence, gentleness, and wisdom in comparison to the Unseelie's in your face malevolence and sadism, Luz knew that the Seelie were, at the core, exactly as dangerous as their Unseelie counterparts. Perhaps more so, given how much better they were at hiding it.
The Boiling Empire had a nonaggression agreement with both sides, but the Boiling Empire was now the Boiling Kingdom, and it had been ruled that said agreement was now invalid. Now Queen Zoe, leader of the Seelie, was in Bonesborough with her rather large entourage, renegotiating her side of the treaty. (Queen Melinoë of the Unseelie would arrive for her side of the negotiations later, after Luz was back on Earth.) The negotiations had been going rather well, and the treaty was going to be signed soon. At least, that's what Lilith assumed – for all she knew, however, things could fall apart at any moment.
That's why it had been more important than usual for Eda to humor Zoe, within reason. So when Zoe had insisted on attending a traditional Boiling Isles ball and asked Emira to set it up in the supposedly hallowed halls of Blight Manor, Eda had been in no position to refuse. She certainly had been in no position to refuse Zoe's request to have Luz attend the gala. Such a refusal would have been considered a grave insult.
The fae were tricksters. They were physically incapable of uttering words that they knew to be untrue, but that was not the same thing as saying they could not deceive. Omissions, loopholes, and words with multiple meanings allowed them to be better liars than they would have been otherwise.
Eda's warnings had been simple, and her uncharacteristic seriousness had caused Luz to hammer them into her head:
Never make a deal with a fae. That meant never offer them anything, no matter how innocuous, or accept anything at all, no matter how much they imply there will be no cost. Luz was to lean on her status as a minor to avoid accepting anything and defer to Camila, Raine, or Eda if the fae seemed like they were getting insulted. Never tell a fae your own name. Even if they know it already, hearing it from your lips can grant them power over you. Always be polite and respectful. The fae do not tolerate insults, even if you didn't mean to be insulting. Pay attention to the exact words spoken, not the implied meanings. This was actually good news for Luz. Her autism meant that her mind leaped to the most literal interpretation possible. She usually had to translate that into metaphorical language when dealing with humans, which after many years of practice, she could do relatively seamlessly. But with the fae, what they said was, precisely and exactly, what you got.Still, despite the ominous nature of these warnings, it wasn't as if she was going to be in huge danger at the party. In fact, it was likely she would be in no danger at all. Zoe appeared to want the treaty just as much as Eda did, and she wasn't likely to do anything particularly bad to jeopardize it.
And, in even better news, Amity would be alongside her at the party! Luz had tried to convince her otherwise. Amity had very bad memories of fancy parties at Blight Manor. But Amity had been adamant that if her awesome girlfriend was walking into danger, she would be doing so alongside her. And, as she'd pointed out, now that Emira was running the show instead of Odalia, Amity didn't have to worry about being forced to do anything that she was uncomfortable with. That had sold Luz in the end.
"You know what, Eda?" Luz said. "You're right. It's going to be a lot of fun! I mean, what's the worst thing that could happen?" Later, she would bitterly curse herself for uttering those words. But for now, she remained blissfully unaware of what the consequences of her tempting fate in such a manner would be.
As Luz strode into the ballroom of Blight Manor at the beginning of the party, the first time she had ever actually been in the ballroom proper, she couldn't help but feel nervous. She knew that the fae wouldn't likely hurt her, but she'd been reading all sorts of tales about their legendary capriciousness and cruelty. Even when they'd acted out of pure kindness, they'd done almost as harm as when acting out of spite, if not more.
But then she saw Amity, dressed in an absolutely stunning black dress, and all her worries disappeared. "You look so pretty!" both of them said at the exact same time. Luz couldn't help but let out a giggle. They'd done that more and more recently. It was as if they were exactly on the same wavelength. Luz had never been much of a believer in true love before, but she couldn't ever envision being with anyone other than Amity for the rest of her life.
Luz posed in the elegant suit and tie combo that she'd chosen for the event. Camila had been worried that such a nontraditional approach would perhaps offend the traditionalist sensibilities of the fae, but Eda had assured her that the fae didn't really care too much about that sort of thing. "I'm so glad you like it," Luz purred, trying to sound seductive, but probably just sounding like she had something stuck in her throat. "I wore it especially for you."
Amity let out a loud eep. "You…you did?"
Luz gave her a kiss, right in front of everyone. "I did." She knew that Amity had been forced to dance and fraternize with boys by her parents at events like these, and so she wanted to make sure that she could give Amity some positive memories to offset the negative ones. She deepened the kiss and became lost in it until she was interrupted by a clearing of a throat.
"I think that perhaps that could wait until later," Raine said gently. Amity gave a squeaking sound, clearly not having heard them approach at all. "I'm sure that Amity appreciates your enthusiasm, Luz, but this is a diplomatic event."
"I'm sorry, Raine," Luz said, genuinely contrite.
Raine nodded. "Don't worry about it. Honestly, I'm probably being paranoid…but as your mothers' partner, it's my job to keep you safe."
Emira walked over to them. "Amy!" she said, wrapping Amity into a big hug. "I'm so glad that you decided to come. This isn't going to be like the other parties, I promise. You can spend as much time with Luz as you want. You don't have to even talk to any boys if you don't want to, not even Edric!" She frowned. "Speaking of which, have you seen Edric? He was supposed to be down here a while ago."
"He and Jerbo are probably making out somewhere," Amity said, her voice carrying a very hypocritical note of disapproval. "They'll show up eventually."
Emira sighed. "I'm not used to having to be, you know, all mature and responsible. It'd be nice to have him around to help – if only so I could look better in comparison."
Their conversation was abruptly interrupted by the sounding of trumpets. A blinding flash of light erupted through the room, and then Queen Zoe and her entourage were standing in the center of the room. A dutiful round of applause ensued from the guests, and Luz applauded along with them.
The most powerful fae used a magic called glamour to make themselves look supernaturally beautiful and alluring, and Zoe appeared to be a master of the art. She looked absolutely perfect. She was the most beautiful individual that Luz had ever seen, bar none. Every facial feature, every aspect of her body, was individually perfect, but together, she appeared more than the sum of her parts. The exact nature of these features was quite irrelevant, and, indeed, Luz really couldn't seem to be able to keep in her mind what Zoe looked like. Other than perfectly beautiful, she wouldn't have been able to describe her at all.
Infuriatingly, knowing that this was magically placed upon her did not make it any easier to shake off. Luz was pretty sure that her face was as red as a tomato and her breathing was embarrassingly heavy. The only consolation prize was that Amity looked like she was experiencing exactly the same thing. Luz looked away from Zoe – and that was really hard to do – and kept her eyes on her girlfriend. That seemed to help, but her heart still beat insanely heavily at the thought of the fae queen.
"Your Majesty, I welcome you to tonight's entertainment," Eda said in a more diplomatic tone than Luz had thought she was even capable of. "Might I introduce you to Luz Noceda, princess of the Boiling Isles, sister to His Majesty the King of Demons, and my beloved daughter?"
Zoe strode forward, seeming to be walking on air. No, wait, she was literally walking on air. Show-off. She walked up to Luz and planted a kiss on her hand. A smell that seemed vaguely like chocolate lingered on Luz's hand afterwards and her nerves tingled with pleasure. "My dear, it is a pleasure to meet you at last," Zoe said, her voice sounding warm and comfortable, like sinking into a hot bath. "Prime Minister Clawthorne has spoken much about your magical prowess."
"The honor is all mine, Your Majesty," Luz said, impressed at how even her voice sounded. Eda gave her a thumbs up. She gestured at Amity. "Please allow me to introduce you to my beautiful, smart, and talented girlfriend Amity Blight."
This time, Zoe planted a kiss on Amity's cheek, seemingly for no other reason than to leave her flustered and tongue-tied. "A pleasure, Miss Blight. Any relation to my host?"
"I am her elder sister, Your Majesty," Emira said, and offered a rigid bow.
"Yes, I can see the family resemblance now," Zoe said. "You both look rather like your mother." Amity's face twitched and Emira's fists clenched, but otherwise, they kept their composure. "Odalia Blight was quite rude during our encounters. Fortunately for you, I do not judge people by the sins of their forebears. And do call me Zoe. I insist."
"Zoe, if there's one thing that I can say with absolute certainty, it is that I am doing my best to try to follow my mother's legacy as little as possible," Emira said fervently.
Zoe offered her a slight smile, which caused Emira's breathing to hitch somewhat. Viney, standing nearby, glared at her. Luz suspected they'd all have to deal with their significant others' jealousy after the evening was over. But that was a later problem. For now, she was feeling energized and hopeful.
"Then let us have some music," Zoe said, clapping her hands. "This is supposed to be a party, is it not?"
Raine snapped their fingers and a flute appeared out of nowhere and fell into their hands. They started playing a beautiful, wistful tune that tugged at Luz's heartstrings in a way that she could barely define. Zoe seemed to find the tune quite acceptable, because she joined the couples on the dance floor. Her dance partner was an androgynous looking fae who appeared to have absolutely no conception of their surroundings and looked like they were in some sort of trance. Luz couldn't help but feel sorry for them.
She offered her arm to Amity. "Might I have this dance?" Amity let out a giggle at Luz's exaggeratedly formal voice, precisely the reaction that Luz was attempting to elicit. Luz swept her girlfriend onto the dance floor. Luz had practiced a ton for Grom, and that practice was being put to good use now.
"You know, before I came here, I never thought that anyone would ever want to dance with me," Luz told Amity. "I was the nerd that no one liked, not even the other nerds."
"Aw, Luz, I told you before – those people had no taste at all."
Luz planted a kiss on Amity's cheek. "Yeah, but it's hard to put the past in the past, especially since I have so much of it. But I do know something that'd make it better."
Amity raised her eyebrows teasingly. "Oh? And what's that?"
"If you'd be my date to homecoming!"
Amity tilted her head. "I don't know what that is."
Oh, right. Of course she didn't. One of these days, Luz was going to have to stop assuming that Amity knew about human stuff. "Right, sorry! It's a dance that's held in late October at my school, to celebrate the football team starting to play games again."
Amity grimaced. "I don't know anything about this football, but if the rest of your team's players are as uncouth as that ruffian I beat up, it's not worth celebrating, is it?" Back in the spring, the star of the football team had made the exceptionally unwise mistake of trying to harass Amity. Amity had broken his arm and given him a concussion in response.
Luz shrugged. "Yeah, I guess so. Most of them are okay. Well, in comparison. But that's not the point! The point is, it'd really make my classmates super envious and regretful that they ever treated me badly if I walk into the gym with the most awesome girl in any realm at my side."
Amity couldn't help but smile at that. "I'll see what I can do, but that's midterms time at Hexside, so I might not be able to go. But if I can, I will!" That was fair enough in Luz's opinion. "You deserve to be treated so much better than they treat you now. I'm still amazed they didn't see how extraordinary you are. You know what it is? It's jealousy, that's what it is. They're jealous of your amazingness."
Luz had heard such talk from Amity before, but that didn't stop it from filling her with joy and awe each time. So many people had tried to bring her down before that it still amazed her that she had people in her life that were trying to raise her up. She was about to say something when the doors to the ballroom slammed open with so much force that it caused a vase to fall off a table and shatter.
"Oh, giraffe," Amity swore. Luz gulped. Amity was not one to toss out profanity lightly, especially not the most heinous swear that the Boiling Isles had to offer. And sure enough, a second later, a drunken looking and absolutely furious Edric stormed into the room.
"What the hell did you do to my boyfriend?!" he shouted. At least, Luz was reasonably certain that was what he was saying. He was slurring his words so much that she had no choice but to make an educated guess.
Zoe tilted her head, an expression of total innocence upon her face. "I? I have done nothing to him. I resent very much the implication that I did. Such an insult would require recompense ordinarily. But in light of your sister's generous hospitality, a verbal apology will suffice."
"You give him back right now!" Edric screamed at her. "We were just standing there…totally not making out or anything more than that, and then he disappeared!"
Zoe nodded. "Ah, yes. I see the confusion. My brother, the prince," she pointed to Prince Zarr, a fae who looked fairly similar looking to Zoe, but with slightly less pointy ears, "found the sounds of your fornication to be offensive. He therefore moved Mr. Galvin to a secure location."
Edric stormed over to Zarr. "Whatever you're thinking of doing, Edric, don't do it!" Emira shouted, but it was too late. Edric put on what turned out to be a cast iron version of brass knuckles and punched Zarr in the face.
Just as in the legends of old, iron was the bane of the fae. It was like radioactive waste to them. Instead of just being left with a bruise, a significant chunk of Zarr's face caved in and green blood splattered onto the floor. He clutched his face, screaming in agony. Zoe's face turned to an expression of abject, horrifying fury. The beauty of that face made the fury all the more terrifying.
Zoe snapped her fingers and everyone, including Luz, was left completely unable to move. She couldn't even blink. She snapped her fingers again and then Zarr's face was healed as completely as if it was never injured. Then she strode over towards Edric, and Luz was certain that Edric was about to die. But he didn't.
Instead, Zoe strode past him and right up to Amity. Luz tried to scream at her to not hurt Amity, to do whatever she was planning to do to Luz instead, but she couldn't even make her lips move. Zoe tapped Amity on the forehead and she dropped like a stone.
"One does not attack a member of the royal court of the Seelie without consequences," Zoe said. "Your sister will now be asleep for all eternity. She will not age, and she will not die. Forevermore, she will be trapped in a dreamless sleep, unable to wake up." She snapped her fingers and everyone could move again. Luz felt like she should be doing something, but she didn't have the slightest clue of what.
"Your Majesty, please don't do this!" Eda begged her. "Amity bears no responsibility for her brother's actions. She is in love with my daughter, and her welfare matters greatly to me."
Oh, of course! Love! They were in love! Just like in Sleeping Beauty, an enchanted sleep could easily be dispelled with a true love's kiss, and after all the trials and tribulations that she'd went through, there could be no doubt that she and Amity were true loves. Before Zoe could stop her, Luz bent down and kissed Amity right on the lips.
And absolutely nothing happened.
Zoe let out an amused giggle. "Oh, Luz. If only there was someone out there who loved you."
Luz's panic and fury was abruptly pushed to the side by this wholly unexpected reference. "You watched Frozen?"
"The fae walk dimensions as easily as breathing," Zoe explained. "We can see and transcend all walls, even the fourth one." She looked up at the ceiling and smiled menacingly. "Isn't that right, the_sentient_duck?"
Luz was confused. The only sentient duck she knew of was the user name behind that awesome Milo Murphy's Law/Knights of the Old Republic fusion fic that she'd been reading, and –
Whoa, hang on a second, Luz! We'll get back to you in a moment, but did you seriously just try to threaten me here, "Queen Zoe?" You do know that I'm the omnipotent god of the universe that you inhabit and that I could kill you with just a few strokes of my laptop's keyboard, right?
"Noted," Zoe responded sourly. Luz was even more bewildered than before. Who was Zoe even talking to? "My dear Luz, you are gravely mistaken if you think that reality works the way it does in your stories." Mija, your fantasy world is holding you back, a memory echoed in Luz's skull. "Did you seriously think that kissing someone who was asleep would wake them up? How could they possibly consent to such a kiss in that state? Besides, even if that was the case, can you truly say that you are Amity's true love?"
Luz nodded. There was not a doubt in her mind. "I am Amity's true love. And as her true love, I want to make you a deal."
"NO, MIJA!" Camila shouted, but then Zoe made a gesture and while Camila kept trying to talk, no words were emerging from her mouth. "I am intrigued by this deal, dear," Zoe said. "Do go on."
"If I can prove that I'm Amity's true love, then you'll wake her up. If I fail, then she'll stay asleep forever." Luz knew that she was probably being incredibly stupid, but it wasn't as if she had another option. Fae sleeping spells were completely and utterly irreversible. No one deserved to be having a fate worse than death for all eternity, much less Amity.
Fortunately – or, more likely, unfortunately – Zoe seemed intrigued by this possibility. "Really? But have you considered the possibility that Amity only latched onto you because you were the first person she really could feel like herself with? In other words, perhaps in a world where Amity never had to be raised by the Blights, she would never have fallen for you."
Luz put up her head in the same stubborn motion that she'd seen Amity do time and time again. "I don't believe that."
Zoe was silent for a few minutes. "Very well. I accept your deal. I will send you to a world – a real universe – where Amity was never raised by her parents. It is a world where she was happy. And you will have to get her to fall in love with you by the end of the season."
Luz blinked. "What season?"
"Ah, yes, you'd be unfamiliar with that perspective of your story. Let us say by the day that you destroyed the portal." Wait, what? Was Zoe sending her back in time too? "And Luz? There is one final thing. If you fail, you will join her in her slumber."
"No," Luz said. "You already accepted my deal! If you want to alter it, then you need to give something in return."
Zoe scowled at her, but Luz was right and the two of them knew it. "Very well. You will know what that something is soon after your arrival." Luz opened her mouth to ask something, but then Zoe snapped her fingers and everything went dark.
When Luz opened her eyes again, she was lying on her bed in the Owl House. The sun was shining and by the looks of things outside her window, it was a perfectly ordinary summer day. Then she looked over at the mirror in the corner and she nearly jumped out of her skin in shock.
She had pointy ears.
She looked exactly the same as she did before, but now she had pointy ears. Was this version of her, the one whose body she was now inhabiting, a real witch? She tried her best to cast a spell the same way that she had done while in Eda's body, but to no avail. Maybe the ears were some sort of illusion?
"¡Es la hora del desayuno, Luz!" a male voice that sounded incredibly familiar to her shouted. "Your paincakes are getting cold!"
Luz, moving slowly and cautiously, exited her bedroom and walked down the staircase. She went into the kitchen, and when she saw who was sitting at the table, she slipped on a sticky patch of liquid (it was generally best not to speculate what such things were) and fell to the ground with an undignified clatter.
"Looks like someone's excited about school today," said her father Eduardo Noceda. Eduardo Noceda, who had been dead for the majority of her life. Her father was alive and in front of her.
Luz just stared at him, her mouth wide open. She knew she should be closing it, but she was too shocked to do so. Eduardo had been dead in her universe since she was six, killed in a hit and run that Luz now was absolutely certain was a deliberate murder. Sure, she'd seen memories and a subconscious construct of him recently, but this was him, her real papi, in the flesh!
"You're dead," Luz blurted out.
Eduardo let out a gentle laugh. "I thought you liked paincakes, mija. There's no need to threaten me over them."
"You…you died," Luz stammered. She knew that she shouldn't be saying it, that she had to pretend to be their Luz, but the words flowed out of her and she didn't seem to be able to stop them.
"Sounds like our kid had a pretty bad nightmare," Eda commented. Luz looked over at her. She hadn't even seen Eda sitting at the table next to Eduardo. King was on the other side of the table from them, too busy eating paincakes to pay attention to their conversation. "You want to talk about it, sweetie?"
Yes. A nightmare. That was a good excuse. "It was horrible," Luz said, not lying at all, at least from a certain point of view. "I dreamed that you'd been dead since I was six…"
"Ouch," Eduardo said. "Wow, no wonder you were so shocked. You know, it's definitely been my experience that dreams in the Demon Realm are much more vivid than they are on Earth. I don't know if it's the same for you because you're half-human."
"Half-human," Luz echoed.
Eduardo nodded, looking more and more concerned at her behavior by the second. "Yes, mija. You're the biological daughter of me, a human, and Eda, a witch. As you well know. Luz…is the nightmare all that's going on here, or is there something else going on?"
Luz was so not about to tell these people her whole story. She stood up and sat down at the table. "Nope, just the nightmare! Sorry if I freaked you out a little. Just…having some trouble shaking it off."
Luz was used to putting on a happy face. For years, she'd had tons of practice. The last thing she wanted to do was put more stress on her mami, who was working a full time job and being a single mother, so she'd pretended that everything was okay in school, that she wasn't utterly miserable at the core. But even she found it difficult to pretend that it was a normal morning when her dead father was eating paincakes right in front of her.
Eda peered at her closely. "You don't seem all right, owlet. Maybe you should take a mental health day. You're looking really pale."
Luz shook her head frantically. She needed to get out of the Owl House and find Amity. "Nope, I'm fine! Besides, I'm really looking forward to spending time with my friends today. You know, Gus and Willow and Amity."
"Amity?" Eduardo said. Damn it, the name didn't ring any bells for him. "I know Gus and Willow, but that name doesn't sound familiar. You should invite her over to the house one day. It's nice to see you making new friends, mija."
Luz let out a nervous laugh. "Yay! I'm quite the socializer here, aren't I?"
There was an unholy shrieking sound as Hooty tried to imitate a doorbell and failed absolutely disastrously. At least some things remain the same no matter what timeline you're in, Luz thought. The idea actually comforted her. Sure, she was in a new timeline, and her father was alive, and she was a half-human, but she was still herself. She was still Luz Noceda, and nothing could faze her. She'd taken on Emperor Belos and Grom. She was tough as nails!
"LUZ, YOUR JOYFRIEND'S HERE!" Hooty screamed and Luz let out a loud yelp. Luckily, no one at all seemed to be suspicious over this, thinking she was freaking out over Hooty's obnoxiousness instead of the fact that she had a boyfriend in this reality. Wait, did he say boyfriend or joyfriend? Well, there was only one way to find out.
Luz walked over to the door and opened it, and Avery Harrington was on the other side.
"Oh," she said dully. "Joyfriend it is."
Before Luz could stop them, Avery swept her into a kiss. And…wow. They were a really good kisser. Amity was a great kisser, of course! She was Amity, for heaven's sake. But Avery just seemed to have a natural talent at kissing. Luz was really starting to get into it when she suddenly realized that she should not be kissing someone who wasn't her girlfriend and pushed them away.
The strange thing was that Luz was not all that surprised to learn that she and Avery were joyfriends in this reality. In her timeline, they were her best friend in the Human Realm. They'd met at a D&D club at her high school and had unhesitatingly believed her when she revealed the existence of magic to them. More than that, Avery had rather transparently had a crush on her and had even asked her out. Luz had to turn them down, obviously, but the only reason why she did so was that she was already in a relationship. If she hadn't been, if she'd gone to Reality Check Camp as planned, she would have said yes in a heartbeat.
"Something wrong, Luz?" Avery said. Luz was annoyed at herself at the way that their voice made her go weak in the knees. Bad knees! They belonged to Amity! They shouldn't be weak!
"I…had a really bad nightmare," Luz said, feeling horrible about lying to someone who clearly cared about her alternate self deeply. "It's got me all shaken up."
Avery looked sympathetic. "Ugh, tell me about it. Stupid magical field augmenting the dreams of humans. It's the worst. Dad has it even worse because of that stuff in his past."
Luz didn't know all that much about Steve Harrington's oh-so-mysterious past. The owner of the Seattle Parapsychological Library, Mr. Harrington occasionally alluded to having had some very harrowing experiences with the paranormal back in the 80s. It was because of those experiences that he had started his library; the more he knew about the supernatural, the better prepared he was for "more crazy monster shit." (Luz liked the way that Mr. Harrington didn't bother regulating his swearing habits around her; it made her feel like he was treating her like an adult.)
Avery offered their arm to her. "Anyway, how's about I walk you to school, mi búho?" That smile on their face was almost blinding in the sunlight.
"Okay," Luz said. "Mami, Papi, Avery's going to walk me to school!" she called out to them.
"Make sure you go straight there!" Eda said, sounding like she had lots of experience with Luz not doing that in the past. Was her other self a rebel? Oh, crap, had she gone further with Avery than kissing?! Luz wasn't even ready for that with Amity, much less Avery! No, no, she was just freaking out for no reason.
She let Avery lead her away, and the two of them chattered about tests and assignments that Luz didn't have the slightest clue about as they made their way through the woods towards Hexside. Thankfully, she could infer that she was able and allowed to use her glyphs in school.
The other Luz was, much to Luz's surprise, in the oracle track, of all things. That was definitely a problem. Luz herself didn't have much aptitude for oracle magic. Unlike most branches of magic, oracle magic was not something you could get much better at. Either you had innate talent or you didn't. Still, maybe the other Luz's talent was now in her? Yeah, probably not.
"You excited about Grom?" Avery asked, and Luz let out a yelp. Of course she and Avery would be going to Grom together. Why wouldn't they?
"I…" Luz looked at Avery's face, and saw that eagerness, and she just couldn't do it. She couldn't keep lying to them. Certainly if she was supposed to seduce Amity (and how the hell was she going to do that when she barely knew how she did it last time?), she couldn't have her supposed relationship with Avery cluttering things up. "I'm not Luz."
Avery tilted their head. "I don't know what that means."
"It means that I'm not the Luz you know. I'm from another universe. Also from the future."
Avery let out a sigh, looking…not all that surprised, now that Luz thought about it. "Luz, don't do this to me. If you want to break up with me, just be straight about it. Don't make up this ridiculous story."
"I'm not lying!" Luz protested. She went ahead and explained everything to them, from beginning to end. They were so going to be late for school by this point, but Luz didn't exactly care anymore. She was probably going to cause her other self to flunk her classes anyway – getting an unexcused absence on her record wasn't exactly anything in comparison to that.
At first, Avery seemed to still believe that she was just making up an excuse to break up with them. But in time, they seemed to realize that she was telling the truth – or that she thought she was telling the truth. "You do realize how this sounds, right?"
"And if someone had told you that you'd be living in a Demon Realm before you came here, would you have believed it?" Luz retorted.
"Touché," Avery conceded. "Look, I believe that you think this story of yours is true. But there's all sorts of potions and objects and creatures that can mess with your mind around here! How am I supposed to know that it is true?!"
Luz planned to offer an exceptionally well-reasoned argument, one that would sweep away all of Avery's objections and enlist them as an essential ally on her noble quest. So it was particularly bewildering that she burst into tears instead. "I don't know! Just…please help me, Avery. Please. I'm completely alone here. You're the only person I know who'd believe me. You believed me in my timeline. Please believe me in this one."
Avery squeezed her hands and gave her a gentle smile. "Okay, Luz. I'm not sure if I do believe you, honestly, but I'm willing to operate on the assumption that your story is true. Can you give me a moment, though?"
Luz gave them a moment. They paced back and forth, appearing to be lost in thought. Luz was just overcome with gratitude that Avery was taking all of this so calmly. If Amity had told her that she wasn't the real Amity and that they needed to stop dating so she could seduce someone else, Luz would be freaking out on her.
Eventually, Avery stopped pacing and walked back over to her. "I'm just wondering if you've thought this through. Let's say that it works. You get Amity – who, by the way, I've never even heard of before – to fall in love with you, and you go home, and your Amity wakes up. Then this Amity will be left completely heartbroken, since my Luz is going to go back to me. You see what I mean?"
"I haven't had time to think anything through," Luz protested. "I've barely had two minutes to myself since I got here this morning!" It was true, though. She rarely, if ever, thought consequential decisions like this one through. It was one of her biggest flaws. "What am I supposed to do, then?"
Avery shook their head. "I know about the fae. There's got to be a way around this. Some way to win on our terms, not theirs."
"Yeah, well, unless you know how to get me back to my universe, get me back to my time, and wake up Amity, we've got no choice but to play their game."
Avery looked frustrated by the idea that she was most likely right. "Yeah. Okay. Look, I don't like this. I don't think it's moral either. But, yeah, if it's a choice between not breaking this Amity's heart and saving your Amity from a fate way worse than death…I can see how you'd make the choice you did." The two of them started walking towards Hexside again, and they were almost to the front gate when Avery stopped in their tracks. "What are we doing? You can't go in there completely unprepared – it'd be disastrous! We're going to have to play hooky so I can brief you. Come on!"
Luz, bemused at Avery's attitude, let herself be pulled away from the school and the two of them walked into the heart of Bonesborough. They stopped at a cafe that Luz adored in her universe, and it looked like her other self's tastes were just as refined. Once they'd both gotten their tea, Avery and Luz tried to puzzle out what the differences between the two timelines were.
In both timelines, Avery had come out to their parents as nonbinary when they were eleven. And in both timelines, Mr. and Mrs. Harrington's reactions had been the same. While Mr. Harrington had been utterly accepting, Mrs. Harrington had flipped her shit. She'd completely freaked out at the prospect of "losing her darling baby girl" to some "whacked out fad lifestyle."
And that's where the point of divergence came in. In Luz's timeline, Avery had run upstairs to their room and bawled their eyes out. Mr. Harrington had defended Avery to his wife, who eventually gave him an ultimatum to choose her or Avery, and Mr. Harrington had chosen Avery. The two of them got divorced and Avery never saw their mother again.
In the timeline Luz was now in, instead of running upstairs, Avery had run outside and their random perambulations caused them to fall through a one-way portal to the Boiling Isles. Apparently, those popped up randomly every so often, with no known rhyme or reason. They were unstable and could last years or minutes or any time in between. Mr. Harrington used some sort of occult ritual to find the portal and then went through it himself, and though the two of them could have returned to Earth using Eda's portal, they chose not to. Being in a dimension that was super cool about Avery's lack of gender was worth all of the often very deadly problems that living in the Boiling Isles presented.
Other Luz had made fast friends with Avery the moment they arrived in Hexside and taught them how to use glyphs. (Apparently, she had discovered them when she was just five years old.) In time, their friendship had blossomed into a romance, and now Other Luz and Avery were just as much in love as Luz and Amity were. Which was definitely going to make things awkward for Avery, Luz knew.
The only other two differences that the two of them could identify after talking for hours were Eduardo's presence and the lack of the presence of the Blights. Avery had no idea who the Blight family even were. They weren't sure exactly how Eduardo had come into the Demon Realm or why, but he had definitely been there for a long time before Other Luz was born.
"Ah, nothing like a nice cup of tea to settle the nerves after hours of dealing with awful customers." Luz let out a yelp at hearing Eda's voice. She tried to hide behind a chair as her mother walked into the teashop, but it was of no use.
Eda crossed her arms. "I know you're out there, Luz. You're just embarrassing yourself now!"
Luz emerged from behind the chair and gave a sheepish wave as she sat back down again. "¡Hola, mami! I promise you, there's a perfectly reasonable explanation for this!"
Eda did the last thing Luz was expecting. She burst out laughing. "Ah, kiddo, I knew I could make a troublemaker out of you one day! Before today, I figured, she's got too much of her dad in her to play hooky. But look at you now! Truly worthy of being a member of the Bad Girl Coven!" She winked over at Avery. "Your joyfriend over here treating you right? Because I know all sorts of illegal spells to deal with them if they ain't!"
Avery let out a sigh. "Well…we sort of wanted to talk to you about that. Er, the joyfriend part, not the treating her badly part." Eda's eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Luz and I, well, we've been doing a lot of talking, and we decided we're better as friends. Maybe in the future, we'll be in a better place, but for now…I think Luz needs her best friend a lot more than she needs a joyfriend." Truer words were never spoken, though more honest ones probably were.
Eda sat down on a chair next to them. Avery looked petrified, probably worried that they were about to be eviscerated. "Avery…I'm proud of you."
Avery blinked. "You are?"
"Hell yeah I am, kid! You know how many people would have let the relationship drag on until it's just a chain dragging you down? A ton! You had the smarts to realize that things weren't working out and ended it in the right way." She slugged them on the arm. "That's the kind of person you are – someone who's respectful of Luz's needs above all else. That's why I was cool with you dating her, and that's why I'm cool with you not dating her."
Eda looked over at Luz. "And I'm proud of you too. I know that Avery was your first significant other, and first love is the hardest thing to let go of."
"Uh, yeah," Luz said, unwilling to say more lest she betray some hint of the real reasons behind their breakup somehow.
"Now…with regards to your playing hooky." Luz gulped. "While my inner troublemaker does like seeing this a lot, my maternal side is telling me that there has to be some punishment." She grinned at Luz. "So I think I'll compromise. You can continue playing hooky if you help your dad out at the store after you're 'done with school.' He doesn't have to know." She pointed a finger at Luz's face. "But I'm making this a onetime deal, since you were so shaken up by that nightmare. Try this again, and I tell your dad."
That sounded more than fair to Luz. Besides, she missed helping out at Eda's stall of human junk. Once she had become prime minister, she had abandoned it. Obviously, being prime minister was more important, but Luz sometimes missed those simpler if more dangerous times. Well, now she would get to relive them!
"And you're going to pay for my drink," Eda said to Avery. "Don't think I don't know that you're the one who convinced her to play hooky."
Avery shrugged. "I was totally expecting you to rip me to shreds, so this is nothing in comparison."
The three of them proceeded to talk over old times, with Eda seeming to add "telling as many embarrassing stories as possible" to her punishment. But, really, Luz was totally cool with learning more about her other self's past. She had been a little worried that having been Luz's biological mother would make Eda different and overprotective, so she was relieved to learn that this wasn't the case. In fact, she appeared to be the cool, permissive parent, the one who let Luz read books that were "too old" for her or turned a blind eye to Luz playing pranks on her bullies. Luz didn't have nearly as many memories of her father as she'd like, but from what she could recall, his dynamic with Camila had been the exact opposite. Maybe he had changed to accommodate his wife's style. Luz wasn't sure how she was supposed to feel about that.
"Well, time flies fast when you're having fun," Eda noted. "I got a Hexus Hold 'Em tournament to attend. Isn't it great that you can help your dad out so I can go?" Luz narrowed her eyes, realizing that she got played, but she couldn't work up too much anger over it. It was a classic Eda move.
As much as Avery would have loved to help Luz out at the store, their dad needed them at home to work on some sort of research project they'd already promised to help out on, so they left her to her own devices. The instant she arrived at the store, Eduardo said, "You skipped school today, didn't you?"
Luz probably should have lied, but the thought of lying to Eduardo over something so small was just unthinkable to her. "I'm sorry, papi. I decided to take that mental health day after all. Mom didn't rat me out, did she?"
"No, that would be the principal. Absences get noticed. You should have told me – I could have made it an excused absence."
Luz wished that she could have stopped the tear falling down her cheek, but she couldn't. Eduardo looked freaked out. "Oh, mija, don't cry! It's okay. Sometimes you need a mental health day. I didn't mean to make you upset." He gave her a warm smile. "Now, let's start with –"
His sentence was abruptly interrupted by a loud clatter coming from inside the tent. Much to Luz's shock, Eduardo pulled out a gun from his jacket and opened the doors. A girl was inside, lying on the floor, unconscious, with a bucket over her head, obscuring her face. She was wearing human clothing – a red t-shirt, jeans, and sturdy looking hiking boots. Eduardo quickly put the gun away and took the bucket off the girl's head, and Luz let out a gasp.
The girl was Amity. Her hair was its natural brown color, and it was pulled back in a ponytail, but it was unmistakably Amity. Luz would know her anywhere, in any timeline. She had expected Amity to be a human, since Other Luz was a half-witch, but judging by her pointy ears, Amity was at least a half-witch, if not a full one. As Eduardo felt for a pulse on Amity's wrist, Amity's eyes opened. They were still the same shade of gold as before, the shade that made Luz's heart beat faster whenever she saw it.
"Hi…" Luz said, feeling tongue-tied and lovestruck. Was this, technically speaking, love at first sight that she was feeling? She supposed it was. "I…I'm Luz. Luz Noceda."
Amity just stared at Luz's pointy ears for a few seconds, and then her face lit up with a brilliant, stunning smile. "Finally," she whispered. Luz blinked. Had Amity been expecting to end up in the Boiling Isles?
Amity pushed past the interior of the tent and her smile just got even bigger upon seeing the Boiling Isles in all their somewhat sickening glory for the first time. When Luz had first arrived, she had been worried that she was dead and that everyone had been right, that her feelings towards girls had damned her. But Amity just exuded pure happiness and joy at seeing her alien surroundings.
"I can't believe it!" Amity said. "I can't believe I'm really here! I've waited for this moment for seven years, and it's even better than I hoped it would be! I was right!"
Luz had no idea what Amity was babbling about, and her treasonous mouth wouldn't work to ask her. Fortunately, Eduardo picked up the slack for her and asked, "Miss, are you all right? You were unconscious earlier."
"Oh, yeah, that," Amity said dismissively. "I tripped on something, no big deal."
"Well, I'm Eduardo Noceda, and this is my daughter Luz," Eduardo said. "I know that this seems scary, but I'm here to help. You're in an alternate dimension called the Boiling Isles." Luz expected denial from Amity, but she just nodded as if she had completely expected to hear that. "It is a place where magic is real. A place where we have many exciting human objects for sale! All of which I just realized you probably won't be impressed by. And you might be…?"
Amity gasped. "I didn't even introduce myself, did I? My mami would not be impressed with me right now." Hang on, did she just say mami or mommy? "I'm Amistad Serrano." Luz couldn't help but let out a gasp. Serrano was Camila's maiden name. "But everyone calls me Amity."
"Do you want to be called Amity or should I call you Amistad?" Eduardo asked her.
Amity blinked. This was clearly the first time that anyone had ever asked her that before. "Amity. I want to be called Amity. But thank you."
Luz let out an insincere laugh – damn it, why was she still a mess around Amity?! – and said, in a tone that made her cringe to even hear it, "So, Amity, could you tell us a little bit about your life on Earth? Maybe about your family?"
"There's not much to tell. I live with my mami Camila – I was adopted, obviously," she added, gesturing at her pale skin and pointy ears, "and my older twin siblings Emma and Edmond." Huh. Why were the names different?
Eduardo nodded. "Do you know anything about your biological parents, Amity?"
"Other than the fact that they had some really strange genetic mutations they passed on to us, not a thing. My siblings and I have this weird extra organ inside us, and their natural hair color is green." She grimaced. "They left my siblings and I in a dumpster. Can you believe that? Mami took us all in. She's the best mother who ever lived."
That was definitely true. Camila was an amazing mother. There were none better, not even Eda. Luz was just relieved to know that she and Amity weren't siblings of any kind in this reality, as that would really have put a crimp in her plans.
"So what are you doing here, Amity?" Luz asked, impressed that her voice was so steady. "You don't look too surprised to be here. Did you find out about this place and come here to look for your biological parents?" If that was the case, she would have to sabotage the search; under no circumstances could this Amity ever even meet the Blights.
Amity shook her head. "I didn't come here on purpose, but I'm not surprised to be here. It's part of my destiny, you see." She let out a light laugh. "Yeah, I'll get to that later. Before I do, you don't happen to have some aspirin or something? My head hurts."
Aha! A chance to impress her girlfriend – er, her girlfriend's counterpart! Luz reached into the backpack she had brought with her back when she thought she was coming to school and pulled out a binder, filled with different labeled glyphs. She found a minor healing glyph, suitable for relieving headaches, and held it up. "This may sound difficult to believe, but I can use magic."
"Really?" Amity said, sounding mildly interested. "So this place is astahfrith?" She looked at the bewildered expressions on both Luz and Eduardo's faces and let out a rueful sigh. "Yeah, too much to hope for, I suppose." To be honest, that bizarre word sounded so familiar to Luz, almost as if she'd read it somewhere once…but she couldn't quite remember.
"I'm going to use, with your permission, my magic to heal your headache," Luz said, not bothering to ask for clarification. Amity would do that at her own time. At Amity's nod, she placed the glyph onto Amity's forehead and activated it. Amity let out a sigh of contentment. The glyph had worked.
"That's my girl," Eduardo said quietly, and Luz couldn't help but feel an explosion of pride. Her father had complimented her for the first time in eight years. "Excuse me, I should grab a healing potion from inside for you, just in case you have a concussion." He went inside the tent.
Amity looked over at Luz and Luz looked over at Amity, and Luz thought she could detect the slightest hint of a blush on Amity's face. Not quite the raging inferno that Luz was used to. But it was a start. Luz reached over and squeezed Amity's hand. Amity let out a soft giggle.
Time to take the plunge. "Well, it's not often that I run into a girl as pretty as you. What do you say that you and I –"
"YOU ARE ALL UNDER ARREST!"
Wow, talk about a mood killer, Luz thought, before doing a double take. She had expected some of Wrath's minions to showed up – they'd done so in the last timeline, and Eda had managed to get out of it all right. But she did not expect not only Wrath himself, but also Lilith to be accompanying them.
Eduardo emerged from the tent, a betrayed expression on his face. "What the hell is happening here? Lilith, I thought we had an understanding!"
"That understanding came to an end when we received word of your plans to assassinate Emperor Belos," Lilith hissed. Luz blinked. Huh? She probably didn't know as much about her father as she should have, but she was pretty sure that he was no assassin.
"I have no idea what you're talking about!" Eduardo protested. He pointed at Wrath. "This isn't the first time this creep has tried to get me imprisoned! You are foolish indeed to fall for his lies!"
Lilith opened the curtain to the stall and circumvented the lock on a hope chest with a spell. Luz let out a loud gasp when she saw what was inside the hope chest. It was guns. Lots and lots of guns – the whole chest was filled to the top with more deadly weaponry than Luz had collectively seen in her entire life. And not just handguns either. There were sniper rifles, assault rifles, machine pistols, even what looked like a grenade launcher.
By the way that Eduardo's face paled, the guns had come as a complete surprise to him. "Oh, Eda, what have you been doing?" he whispered.
"The emperor is currently…indisposed," Lilith said. Was that worry on her face? Or even fear? "But when he…returns, I assure you, you will likely be executed by petrification."
Eduardo's eyes widened in horror. And with good reason, as Luz well remembered from her own experience with Eda almost getting petrified.
"What?!" Amity shouted. "Without even a trial? What sort of a system do you even have here?" She held her hand out and a pistol flew into her hand, telekinetically. Luz blinked. Of course Amity would have magic, but there was a huge difference between being born with it and actually being able to wield it.
Amity pointed the gun at Lilith's head. "Let him go right now."
"No," Lilith said simply. "I regret having to do this, young lady. He is the father of my niece, after all. But such a crime cannot stand. How exactly do you propose to stop me with that puny human weapon of yours?"
Amity pulled the trigger without even hesitating for a single second. Luz couldn't help but flinch. But the gun only let out a click. Even Eda wasn't irresponsible enough to keep her arsenal loaded. Amity groaned and tossed the gun onto the ground.
Lilith handcuffed Eduardo and dragged him away. "Go through the portal! Leave now!" Eduardo shouted before Lilith used a silencing spell on him and they disappeared from sight.
Luz, out of sheer instinct, took a step towards the portal before stopping and realizing how ridiculous that idea was. "I think I know why I'm here now," Amity said, her voice filled with absolute certainty. "I'm going to help you rescue your dad, Luz. And then I'm going to finish what he started and help him kill Emperor Belos."
"What?!" Luz shouted. "No! You can't just go around killing people, Amity! And Dad's not an assassin! He was framed!" Amity looked skeptical. "I mean, I'm not denying that these are his guns. Well, actually, they're probably Mom's guns. But still! He's not a killer. And neither are you."
"Okay, well, I'll defeat him then," Amity said. Luz believed that she would try. That wasn't the same thing as saying she believed Amity would succeed. "The point is, you've been laboring under the yoke of a tyrannical despot, a servant of the Lone Power, and I'm the one who's been tasked to save you."
It was hard to know what to make of that statement. Was this version of Amity completely sane? Luz wondered. It didn't matter anyway. Luz had no doubt that Wrath wouldn't even wait for Belos to return. He'd arrange some accident for Eduardo in time. If only Eda was around! But Luz wouldn't even know how to start finding her at her underground card tournament.
"Let's do things one step at a time," Luz suggested. "Rescue my dad first and then you can explain what the heck you keep going on about."
Amity actually giggled at that. "I suppose I must sound quite mad to you. It'll all make sense when I explain it, I promise. Where does your mom keep the ammunition for these guns?"
Luz shrugged. "I didn't even know these things were here until now. My guess is back at my house somewhere…though maybe not. If I were her, I'd try to keep them as far away from King – that's my little brother – as possible."
Amity frowned. "Okay, no guns. Which is for the best, I guess. I don't know how to use them very well anyway, and also…I'm not really 100% comfortable with just going around shooting people. What about other allies we can rely on? Do you have friends or other family?"
"Let me make some phone calls?" Luz asked and stepped into the street. She found a scroll in her backpack and dialed Avery first, only to reach a voicemail. She called Mr. Harrington too, but also got a message. Not surprising. Avery could really get absorbed when they were involved in a big project. Then she was about to call Gus and Willow, but then she hesitated. They could get into major trouble if they got involved. Not to mention the fact that she wasn't ready to face them yet.
"Sorry," Luz said, "everyone's pretty busy with, like, homework and stuff."
"It's okay," Amity said, a perky smile on her face. Luz just loved the way that she felt so comfortable with expressing her emotions. Without Odalia constantly suppressing her, Luz was seeing Amity as the sunny, confident young woman that she knew and loved not just as her innermost self, but also her outermost self. "We're going to save him. I swear. We both have magic, and we have a righteous cause. Lead us to our destination, Lady Luz!"
Luz giggled. "As thou wilt it, my lady Serrano!"
The two of them walked through the streets of Bonesborough. Amity wasn't nearly as insular as she had been in Luz's reality. She was quick to volunteer information about her past at a moment's notice. Luz was relieved to learn that Amity hadn't found school to be as misery inducing as she had found it, doubtlessly owing to her calmer nature. But still, Amity did have to face a ton of bullying over the years. Her pointy ears, interracial adoptee status, and a third, mysterious factor that she quickly clammed up about when mentioned, made her a constant target.
Yet Amity did not retreat into fantasy as Luz did. She faced her bullies head-on, confronting them both socially and physically on a regular basis. Eventually, the bullies had decided that she just wasn't worth the effort it would take to bully her and had pretty much ignored her.
Luz couldn't help but feel a twinge of envy at hearing how different Amity's story had been from her own. Of course, that was not the only factor. She'd also had Emma and Edmond to defend her. They'd been utterly ruthless to anyone who messed with their little sister. Apparently, Emma had broken a bully's jaw at one point. Luz wished she could meet them. They sounded even cooler than Edric and Emira, and Luz didn't even think that was possible.
"There it is," Luz said. "The Conformatorium." Amity winced at the ominous name. She was clearly quite intelligent and could guess what sort of things occurred in there. "It's where people go when they don't…fit the mold. Belos despises dissent and doesn't believe in due process. Most of the time, people go in, and they don't come out."
Amity made a brown spell circle. "Today, we're going to make an exception." Brown light emerged from her finger like a laser pointer and when it made contact with the metal bars of the Conformatorium's front entrance, the bars melted as if they were made of tissue paper. Luz couldn't help but gape. Amity was raised human, but she was using highly advanced construction magic. Not even her Amity was capable of such things.
It was ironic, really. Amity's parents thought that their cruelty was necessary to allow Amity to reach the peak of her magical potential. Yet it was becoming abundantly clear that it had done the exact opposite, and inhibited her from becoming the incredibly powerful witch she should have been all along.
Amity strode into the Conformatorium as if she owned the place. There was not the slightest amount of doubt in her face. She knew she was about to win. Luz wasn't sure if that was an act or not, but damn, it was hot. She wondered if – no! Bad Luz! Don't get distracted!
Luz used her glyphs to hold off guards by summoning various carnivorous plants – she seemed even better with them than she was in the other timeline, which was probably good news for later – but her display of magic paled in comparison to Amity's. She hurled bricks into guards with abandon, effortlessly created illusions of wild animals which caused the guards to lock themselves into cells to escape them, and used her laser spell to burn any guard that came close, taking special care not to kill them.
It was just…astonishing, really. Did Amity had some sort of magic wielding mentor in the human realm? Was Eda secretly mentoring her? How had she managed to become so powerful?
Finally, they reached Warden Wrath's office and Amity just ripped the door completely off its hinges and disintegrated it in a shower of shards rather than, you know, just entering the conventional way. Even if Luz hadn't been on a mission to seduce this Amity, she'd have had to ask her out after seeing that.
Eduardo was strapped to what looked like some sort of torture device, though other than a few cuts and bruises, he looked mostly unharmed. Wrath held a scalpel in his hand and when he saw Luz and Amity, he quickly pressed it against Eduardo's throat.
"Willing follower of the Fallen," Amity said, sounding like she was reciting something, "be warned by me! We are on the business of the Powers that Be, and by Their power vested in us, unless you dispense forthwith to your own places, we will utterly undo and abolish you." Luz could barely stop herself from swooning. Did Amity even have the slightest clue how hot she was when she was saying things like that?
Wrath did not look impressed. "Okay, counterproposal: You leave, and I don't cut his throat."
"And then what?" Amity asked.
"And…then I kill you?" Wrath said slowly, sounding bewildered. "I mean, it's not all that complicated."
Luz could see exactly where Amity was going with this. "Yeah, but you're doing this because you're into my mom, right? You think, oh, Dad's gone, so she'll be so vulnerable that she'll fall for the first…individual to come along." Luz never thought she could lace such an innocuous word with such hatred before. "But if you kill her daughter, it'll just devastate her. There'll be no more room in her heart for you!"
Incredibly, this ridiculous argument seemed to be working. Wrath looked like he was seriously giving credence to her words. "But," Amity continued, "maybe you're going about this the wrong way. Eda's a gentle soul at her core. If you try to be a nicer person, maybe she'll see that she was wrong about you!"
"You really think that'll work?" Wrath said hopefully.
"Absolutely," Luz lied through her teeth. "And you know what'd really get her to see a different side to you? If you released all those prisoners who are unjustly locked up here!"
Wrath nodded eagerly. "Yeah! Yeah, you're right! Once I do that, she'll be totally in love with me!" Luz had never heard a more ridiculous statement come out of anyone's mouth ever, but her father's life was on the line, so she just nodded enthusiastically.
"But she might play hard to get for a while, so don't be surprised if she doesn't respond to your advances right away," Amity added quickly. Luz was impressed. That would keep Wrath out of their hair for a while.
Wrath severed Eduardo's bonds and removed the gag from his mouth. "Hey, sorry about torturing you there. No hard feelings?" Eduardo grimaced, but nodded. "Eda's a hell of a gal. May the best man win her affections."
"Oh, I am abundantly certain that will be the case," Eduardo said through gritted teeth. "Let's get out of here, mija."
Eduardo, Luz, and Amity ran for it before Wrath could change his mind. The guards didn't bother to stop them. Amity's rampage seemed to have knocked the fight out of them. By the time that they returned to Eda's stall, Luz's mood had become much more cheerful. She and Amity had saved the day! They'd saved her father!
And then she saw the portal. Well, where the portal should have been. Instead, there was just a huge pile of dust. "Luz, please don't tell me that you left the portal unattended," Eduardo said, horror in his voice.
"Oops?" Luz offered. "Sorry about that?"
Eduardo sighed. "It's a good thing that our security system worked." Amity cast an inquisitive look over at Eduardo. It was nice having someone around, Luz reflected, that had a legitimate excuse not to know stuff that Luz should have known. "When someone with a coven tattoo – I'll explain what that means later – touches the portal, it disintegrates. The portal, not the tattoo. Since I'm human and Eda is a covenless witch, that should – and did – keep it safe from the emperor's cronies."
Amity offered him a reassuring smile. "Well, it's not a big deal. You can just build a new one."
Eduardo grimaced. "The thing is, Amity…I can't. Eda and I don't know how the portal works. She found it in a junkyard one day. We don't know who built it or how to recreate it."
Amity looked absolutely horrified. "But…but that means I'm stuck here, doesn't it? No, it can't be! There has to be a way to get me back! There has to be! My mami y mis hermanos, they're going to be worried sick! They'll think I'm dead!"
Eduardo sighed. "I'm sorry, Amity. We're going to do everything we can to rebuild the portal, but it's going to take a lot of time. In the meantime, you'll have the hospitality of the Owl House. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to track down your mother, Luz. She is in a lot of trouble. I can't believe she kept an arsenal under my nose!"
He stormed off, leaving Luz alone with a devastated looking Amity. "I'm so sorry," Luz whispered. "I can't imagine what you must be feeling right now." Technically true. She couldn't imagine, because she knew. The portal door had only been destroyed for weeks in her timeline, but she'd spent every day of those weeks panicking that she'd never be able to return to Earth.
Amity just shrugged, looking resigned now. "It's okay, Luz. I should have known that if I was going to get involved in this, the Powers would force me to commit fully to it."
"Maybe you could explain what you mean by that?"
Amity nodded, and took a deep breath. "I bet you're wondering how I'm able to wield magic the way I can. You see, Luz…I'm a wizard."
"¿Qué?"