JENNIE
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—Two years later…
"Daddy's home!" Ellie jumps up from the couch, abandoning her tablet to greet Lisa at the door the way she always does. "Daddy!" She jumps on Lisa's leg as soon as she walks into the door.
"There's my best girl." She smiles down at her, rustling her hair. "Did you have a good day at school?"
"The best." She giggles as Lisa starts to walk with her sitting on her foot, her body wrapped around her leg.
"Oh yeah, what did you do?"
"We got to paint with food!" she announces excitedly.
"With food?" I watch Lisa crinkle her nose, having a perfect view of the two of them from where I'm standing in the kitchen.
"Uh huh. We got to blend it up in a blender and paint with it."
"That sounds, um, interesting." She glances up at me, a questioning look on her face.
"Apparently, it's this new thing they're doing." I shrug, smiling at my gorgeous wife as she makes her way into the kitchen, our daughter still attached to her leg.
So much has happened over the last two years. So many big moments, yet it's the small ones that are my favorite. The little things that make up our everyday lives. Though the day we got married definitely sits at the top of that list. My favorite big moment.
We didn't do it the conventional way. Then again, when have Lisa and I ever really been conventional? We got married in my mother's backyard, under the treehouse. Our treehouse. With Jisoo on one side and Mike on the other, we said our vows with our sweet precious girl squished between us.
Of course, my mom wasn't very happy to learn we'd tied the knot in her backyard when she wasn't home and didn't extend an invite to her. But it wasn't about her. It wasn't about anyone but us. And we did it exactly how we wanted to. And it was perfect.
"Some of the things they come up with these days." Lisa chuckles, dropping her keys on the island before bending down and picking Ellie up into her arms.
"We got to eat the leftovers too!" She grins, revealing the gap where her two front teeth used to be.
It's crazy how quickly she's growing. It's like I blinked twice and my baby was in kindergarten.
"How fun." Lisa nuzzles her chin against Ellie's cheek, causing her to giggle.
"Daddy, you're making me tickles." She wiggles until Lisa reluctantly sets her on her feet.
"Ellie, why don't you go play until dinner is ready," I tell her, pointing toward the couch. "And don't forget to get your tablet."
"Okay." She skips into the living room, grabbing her tablet before disappearing down the hallway.
"And how was your day?" Lisa asks, crossing around the island to pull me into her arms.
"It was good." I lean in for a quick kiss. "How about you?"
"It was work." She shrugs.
About a year ago, Lisa completed her certification and became a licensed mechanic. Six months later, Devin made her lead mechanic at the shop. She has rough days just like the rest of us, but all and all she really seems to love what she does and the people she works with. And in a way I think it makes her feel connected to Bobby, since he was the one who got her the job there in the first place.
I finally got moved to dayshift a few months ago, so now I get to spend every evening at home with my family. It's been a transition, but a nice change. Especially with Ellie starting school.
"What's all this?" Lisa gestures around the kitchen where I have the start of a salad sitting on the island. Rising dough in a bowl on the counter, and the most delicious butter garlic sauce simmering on the stove.
While I typically cook most nights, I don't usually go quite so lavish.
"Dinner." I smile.
"Yeah, but what's the occasion?"
"You don't remember?" I give her a doubtful look.
"Remember what? Shit, is it our anniversary?" She looks mildly panicked.
"Lisa!" I playfully smack her chest. "Two and a half years sober today."
"Shit, is that today?"
"How could you forget?"
"I remember the years, not the months in between. I knew it was coming up, but I didn't know today was the specific date."
"Yep. Two and a half years ago today you made a choice that led us to where we are now." I step back into her, wrapping my arms around the back of her neck. "I'm so proud of you." I lean in for another kiss.
"Babe, you really didn't have to do all of this." She rubs her nose against mine.
"You think this is good. Wait until you see the cake!"
"There's cake?" She laughs.
"Um, duh." I giggle, wiggling out of her hold to stir the sauce on the stove. "Actually, why don't you grab it out of the fridge while I'm thinking about it?"
I'm a ball of nerves as I watch her out of the corner of my eye. She opens the door, grabs the cake, and without even looking at it, sets it on the counter.
"Aren't you going to look at it?" I ask, setting my stirring utensil next to the stove before turning to face her.
"Can't I look at it when I eat it?" she questions.
"No, I need you to look at it now," I tell her, my excitement causing me to rise up and down on the balls of my feet.
"O-k-a-y." She seems mildly confused as she lifts the lid off the cake pan and looks down.
It seems to take her a minute to process the words written across the top, but her expression changes the moment she does. A smile stretches across her face and her eyes come up to mine.
"Seriously?"
"Seriously." I let out a tiny squeal when she grabs me and spins me off my feet.
"I can't believe it." She lowers me down, cupping my face in her hands.
"Well believe it, Daddy. Baby number two is officially in the oven."
She draws back, looking down at my belly.
Shortly after we got married, I had my IUD removed. With Ellie already almost five at the time, we didn't want to wait long to have more children. We started trying a few weeks later, but after six months we had started to think maybe it wasn't going to happen for us after all.
But then this morning, I took a test like I do every month right around the time of my period, and low and behold, that little plus sign I have been praying for finally appeared. Of course, I promptly ran out and bought three more tests just to be sure. And sure enough, all three were positive.
"We're having another baby." Her smile is so radiant it steals my breath. And then she does something completely unexpected. She leans down, presses a kiss to my stomach, and whispers something that I can't hear.
"What are you saying down there?" I look down at her like she's lost her mind.
"Nothing." She straightens, her smile still firmly intact.
After missing out on the first three and a half years of Ellie's life, I know how much it will mean to her to be a part of this. To see her child grow inside of me. To feel him or her kick. To watch them be born. To hold them for the first time. To witness their first steps and their first words. It's all the things I got to experience with our daughter that she missed.
"So, are you happy?" I ask, even though I already know the answer.
"So happy I feel like I could burst." She kisses me again, not pulling away until we hear the grumblings of our daughter as she enters the room to see mommy and daddy kissing.
"Gross." She sticks out her tongue like she's trying not to puke.
"Gross?" Lisa fakes offense. "Don't say such mean things about your mom." She winks at me, before leaning down and tossing Ellie over her shoulder.
She looks down at the cake from her upside-down angle, her little face scrunching in confusion.
"Happy two and a half years," she starts to read aloud. "And it's a boy or a girl…guess we'll see." Her gaze pops up to me. "What does that even mean?" She seems so confused that I can't help but laugh.
"It means, little munchkin," Lisa says, lowering Ellie to her feet before crouching down in front of her. "That you are going to be a big sister."
"I'm going to be a big sister?" Her eyes go wide and she looks up at me to make sure her daddy isn't messing with her. I nod once and I swear the noise that leaves her mouth should've come with its own warning label. "I'm going to be a big sister!" she screams in excitement. Taking off in a full sprint around the kitchen table, she chants, "I'm going to be a big sister. I'm going to be a big sister." After a few laps, she comes to a screeching halt and her eyes swing back up to me. "Wait. Is it a boy or a girl?"
"Does it matter?" I put my hand over my mouth to stifle my laugh. I can't help it. The way she's looking at me it's like her question is a matter of life or death.
"Yes!"
"Well, we don't know yet. We won't know for a few months."
"It better be a boy."
"Why, you don't want a little sister?" Lisa asks.
"No, because that means I'll have to share my toys and when she gets older she'll steal all my clothes."
"Where did you hear that?" I ask.
"Hailey at school has a little sister and she says she's the worst."
"I'm sure that's not true," Lisa starts, only to be cut off by Ellie.
"It better be a boy." She points her little finger directly at her daddy.
"Pretty sure that's out of my control at this point. But that doesn't mean you can't hope for a little brother."
"I'm going to go pray on it right now." She spins and takes off out of the room without another word.
Lisa stands, turning toward me with a look I can only describe as what the fuck written across her face.
"Hey, don't look at me. She's your daughter."
"Damn it to hell, she really is." She laughs, pulling me back into her arms. "We're having a baby," she says again like she hasn't fully wrapped her head around this fact.
"We are." I kiss her jaw and then her cheek before my lips find hers.
"I love you," she murmurs against my mouth.
"I love you, too," I say, knowing just how much I truly mean those words. With every breath I take. With every beat of my heart. Our love is all consuming. It always has been.
Life doesn't always turn out exactly as we expect it to. Sometimes there are bumps in the road and sometimes there are boulders. But what defines us is how we maneuver around them. We only get as much as we're willing to fight for, and with Lisa, I will fight until my last day on this Earth. Because she is worth it. She's always been worth it.
Despite all the pain and heartache we had to endure, we found our way back to each other. To a life better than we could have ever imagined.
It's so easy to dismiss those who suffer from addiction. To write them off as a lost cause and to turn our backs on them when they need us the most. But Lisa is a shining example that people can and do overcome addiction. And they do it every single day.
She still struggles, probably a lot more than she admits. But she's strong. Stronger than she ever realized. And I'm happy to hold her hand whenever that strength wavers.
We aren't perfect. I don't think anyone ever is. But our love comes pretty damn close. And in the end, that's all that matters anyway.
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THE END