34. BEFORE
Since Holly had made plans to meet her godfathers in Hogsmeade (and since he was most certainly not invited to tag along), he decided to skip this excursion to the Wizarding village and instead make up for whiling away the previous afternoon in bed with his young wife. These last few weeks, he had admittedly prioritised Holly and his political agenda over his teaching duties and as a result he was rather behind with marking homework and preparing his practical lessons. Furthermore, Dumbledore had seen fit to assign him to supervise detention for the twenty-four students who had had pornographic pictures in their possession – no doubt his idea of petty revenge for Tom's insistence that they be punished at all. It would be a considerable strain on his time, but he didn't mind all that much for the chance to see justice done for Holly and all those whose privacy had been violated. Besides, he already had a plan, though he would have to make a trip to Slytherin Castle for that.
He finished marking the essays on water-dwelling Dark creatures from his Third Year students and reviewed the last few research proposals the Seventh Years had handed in for their independent study, made a list of offensive potions he needed Severus to brew for one of his practical lessons and issued an invitation to Solomon Thymus for a hands-on lesson on vampires. That accomplished, he opened the fireplace for Floo travel and called out his destination, stepping through to his study in Slytherin Castle.
His desk was deceptively orderly, but he knew that was mostly thanks to house elf magic and his own Organising Spell. It took him the better part of two hours to get caught up on his correspondence, read the various reports and delegate future tasks where necessary. He then called Antonin to his office for a report on the castle's security, less than pleased when he heard that Bellatrix had paid the castle a visit in his absence.
"And you just let her go?" he demanded angrily.
"Begging your pardon, my Lord, but I did not know that you wished her to be detained," Antonin replied stiffly. "It was my understanding that you had ordered her to keep her distance while your wife resided in the castle. Since your wife is currently at Hogwarts I saw no reason to refuse Bellatrix' request to collect some of her personal belongings."
"And was that all she did?" Tom asked, striving for an even tone.
"Yes, my Lord. We kept an eye on her," Antonin replied, evidently relieved to be able to confirm at least this much, though Tom doubted that 'keeping an eye on' Bellatrix would have been enough to stop her if she was really planning something – which was almost a given.
"Henceforth, I expect to be informed immediately about any unexpected visitor. And confine Bellatrix to one of the guest rooms if she should show up again," he ordered, barely waiting for Antonin's quick agreement before demanding he do a complete review and update of the castle's security and the rota for sentry duty.
He couldn't say why exactly the thought of Bellatrix' return caused him such an intense feeling of unease, except that he was well familiar with her unforgiving nature and knew better than to underestimate the wrath of a witch scorned. It felt like this might have been the opening salvo in Bella's quest for vengeance and he hated that he didn't know what to make of it.
§*§*§*§*§
Holly had a great time with her godfathers in Hogsmeade, with the two Marauders showing her and Hermione all their favourite spots and regaling them with stories about their many adventures. They visited Honeydukes and re-emerged with pockets full of sweets, stepped into Zonko's for a bit of market research for Fred and George and had lunch at the Three Broomsticks. They showed her the perfect spot for a picnic, on a small hill overlooking the lake and shaded by old oaks, where her father had once taken her mother for their first date, and pointed out the secluded stretch of shore that was ideal for skinny dipping. Sirius also sweet-talked the lady from the post office to let them take a peek into the hatchery where about a dozen owls were currently nesting.
The only slight mishap happened in the end when Sirius, who had been running ahead in his Animagus form, trying to catch falling leaves and making them break out in peals of laughter, cut his paw on a piece of glass, his sudden yowl of pain so loud and piercing that it went right through her. Remus was the first at his side, with a burst of his werewolf speed that he normally kept so carefully hidden, followed by Rudolphus, who had been following them with his brother at a respectful distance because Tom apparently felt that this was the best use of their time. Rabastan caught up to Holly and Hermione, his wand drawn and his stance battle-ready as he escorted them to the three other wizards.
At the sight of Sirius' bloody hand and his face twisted in pain, Holly's eyes started to burn, all the emotions – Remus' and Hermione's worry, exasperation from Rudolphus and Rabastan, Sirius' embarrassment and chagrin – slamming into her with full force.
"Shh, pup, none of that," Sirius said, putting his good arm around her shoulders and drawing her into his sheltering embrace. "It's just a little scrape and I'll be right as rain in no time, right, Moony?"
But it wasn't Remus who answered. Instead, Dumbledore popped up suddenly like a bad thought, kneeling down with only a delicate little groan to indicate his advanced age. "Oh my, what do we have here?"
He took Sirius' injured hand without waiting for a reply, quickly vanishing the thick shard of glass and cleaning the wound with a murmured Episkey. The cut stopped bleeding, but it didn't close entirely and Dumbledore hummed unhappily.
"We'd best take you to the Hospital Wing so that Poppy can have a look at that," he declared. "It seems to be a little deeper than I had hoped and you don't want to risk an infection. Up you go, my dear boy."
Remus caught Holly when she was dislodged by Sirius' sudden upward momentum and waited until Rabastan had placed a stabilising arm around her shoulders before he stepped up to Sirius' free side. "Thank you, Headmaster, but I'm almost certain that won't be necessary. Sirius and I have a rather extensive first-aid kit at home… And I'm sure both you and Madam Pomfrey already have a very busy schedule without adding us into the mix."
Dumbledore offered some protests, saying that he was happy to help and that he had just come back from a visit with Hagrid to discuss his lesson plans and was thinking of having a nice cup of tea and a few lemon drops. Maybe they'd care to join him? His gaze wandered over to Holly, his silver brows drawn together as he remarked that she looked pale and that maybe she needed to go to the Hospital Wing as well.
Thankfully, Rabastan and Rudolphus intervened before he could insist on the matter, still politely, but with a lot more directness than Remus would have dared, pointing out that Holly and Sirius could probably make that decision for themselves and that anyone might feel a little queasy at the sight of blood. Sirius immediately assured all of them that he was fine, placing his arm once more around her shoulders and keeping it there until Dumbledore – after another round of well-meaning words and unsolicited advice – finally took his leave.
Holly still insisted on checking Sirius' wound for herself, using a nifty little spell Madam Pomfrey had taught her to numb the pain and adding strict instructions for Sirius to clean and bandage the wound as soon as they got home. At that, Remus and Sirius exchanged a look and fond, slightly wistful smiles that usually meant that she had said or done something to remind them of her parents. Then, they pulled her into another hug, long and safe and packed with good feelings, before they said their goodbyes, leaving the Lestrange brothers to escort Hermione and her back to the castle, only taking their leave when they had safely passed the great double doors.
They returned to the Gryffindor common room for an hour or so of studying because Hermione was fretting a little about how much study time she had lost that day. So Holly finished her Herbology homework and got started on Potions while Hermione did some additional reading for their Defence class and optimised her schedule for exam preparations for what must have been the tenth time.
When it was time for dinner, Hermione opted to stay behind, claiming that she was still full from the late afternoon tea and cake they had enjoyed in a homey little bakery where they had been served the most amazing pumpkin pies Holly had ever tasted. Still, at the thought of skipping dinner, her stomach gave a grumble of disapproval so she made her way back downstairs to the Great Hall.
Tom got up from his seat at the head table as soon as he saw her and crossed the hall to reach her side, gently touching her shoulder, his long, elegant fingers brushing lightly over her robes. It was somehow more intimate than if he had grabbed her. A brand of ownership. Though, as Tom didn't seem to be able to stop himself from reaching out to her, she wasn't sure who owned whom. It was kind of nice, in any case, and she smiled up at him.
"Hi. How was your day?"
"Probably not as exciting as yours," Tom replied wryly, almost absent-mindedly casting a Privacy Bubble around them to ward off any of her too curious classmates. "How is your godfather?"
"You want to know how Sirius is doing?" Holly asked a little suspiciously.
"I want to know how you are doing, kitten, and I know his getting hurt upset you," Tom corrected, studying her carefully.
"It wasn't the blood," Holly mumbled, guessing what Rudolphus and Rabastan must have told him. "It was the sound he made… the same as when the Dementors caught him and tried to give him the Kiss. I had nightmares about that for weeks afterwards."
Tom touched her shoulder again. "He was fully exonerated and we already pushed through some very strict new regulations to keep the Dementors confined to their posts. You can put that fear to rest, kitten."
"I just can't lose him," Holly whispered, knowing how pathetic that probably sounded to a Dark Lord.
But Tom just gave her a smile full of understanding, gently brushing a lock of her hair behind her shoulder. "Do you want me to send Severus to check in on him?"
Holly snorted, rolling her eyes in exasperation. "I want him to feel better, Tom, not have the two of them get into yet another pointless shouting match."
"Fair enough. I'll owl-order some healing potions and salves from an apothecary and have it delivered to them. I'm sure it will come in handy either way, considering their lifestyle," Tom offered and Holly gave him a precautionary glare because she wasn't sure if that last comment had been a swipe at her godfathers.
"I was referring to Lupin's lycanthropy, not to anything untoward," Tom clarified before suddenly starting to grin. "I reserve those things strictly for you, my little lioness."
Holly blushed vividly, remembering all the things Tom was alluding to. She imagined that she could still feel his hands gliding over her skin, his hot breath and nipping kisses, his tenderness and patience and the way it had felt right in a way it hadn't before.
Tom's grin got wider, a dangerous glimmer sparking in the dark-red depths of his eyes as he moved a little closer and placed a hand feather-light on her waist. He looked hungry, and not for dinner. Holly licked her lips, trying to come up with something to say when a sudden disturbance in the hall demanded her attention.
"Is that… Did you bring Nagini to Hogwarts?" Holly exclaimed when she spotted the cause of the students scattering in fright, some seeking safety by jumping onto their chairs or even onto one of the long House tables.
"I need her to supervise detention for me," Tom replied easily, calling Nagini to their side with an affectionate hiss of her name and completely ignoring the scared looks from his students. "She must have just got back with the first group. I'm having them clean out the Chamber of Secrets – that should keep them occupied for at least a few weeks."
Holly crouched down to greet Nagini properly, caressing her scaly head and brushing away a cobweb that had caught on her sleek body.
"Tom, what is the meaning of this?" Dumbledore had stepped up to them, cancelling Tom's Privacy Charm with a little flick of his wand. "This school is no place for dangerous animals."
He was using his best voice of disapproval, the same tone of heavy disappointment that Holly imagined he had employed often when he had been Tom's professor, though given that he had also invited three-headed dogs and dragons to the school and had hired Hagrid as their teacher, who had introduced his classes to such cuddly creatures as Blast-Ended Screwts, she still found his words a tad hypocritical.
But as she had told Tom, she had no interest in picking sides in this feud of theirs. So instead, she talked with Nagini about her day and how she liked Hogwarts so far, a little surprised at how much Nagini had apparently enjoyed her foray into the Chamber of Secrets, almost as if she had slithered on hallowed ground by entering the demesne of a basilisk. In her account of her exploration of the Chamber, the students featured only marginally, which given that Tom had charged her with keeping an eye on them was perhaps not the best advocacy for his scheme.
When Nagini hissed a rather indifferent goodbye and sidled out of the hall for a spot of hunting in the Forbidden Forest, Dumbledore and Tom were still not finished with their discussion since neither of them seemed willing to concede anything. Holly straightened up from her crouch, accepting Tom's proffered hand.
§I'm going to go have dinner. If Nagini stays, could you have a talk with her about not eating any of my classmates' pets, please? I tried to ask her, but I'm not sure she got my point…§
§I'll do that,§ Tom promised, lifting her hand to his lips to breathe a soft kiss over her knuckles. §See you later, kitten.§
"Bye, Tom. Good evening, Headmaster," Holly replied, giving Dumbledore a small nod.
"And a good evening to you, too, Holly. Enjoy dinner with your friends – I'm sure it will be more interesting than listening to two old men nattering," he said, his pale blue eyes twinkling madly.
Tom snorted angrily. "Speak for yourself, Dumbledore."
Holly slipped away from round two of their argument, instead directing her steps towards the Gryffindor table and taking a seat opposite of Neville and next to a giggling Lavender and Parvati. Judging the quiet, kind-hearted boy to be the safer choice for dinner conversation, she smiled a greeting at him as she started to fill her plate.
"Hey, Nev. So, did you end up buying that new set of Gobstones?" she asked.
"Ah, no. I think Uncle Algie mentioned something about maybe getting me a new set for Christmas." He blushed with a sheepish expression on his rounded face. "Thank Merlin, I remembered it in time! I never would have heard the end of it otherwise and everyone is so excited for the first family Christmas with Mum and Dad, I don't want to ruin that."
"I'm sure you couldn't," Holly reassured him gently. "And I'm sure your parents are looking forward to it as much as you."
"Yes," Neville agreed, quietly pleased. "They are doing really well, you know? They still have to do rehabilitation therapy and take a lot of potions to try and fix the nerve damage, of course. Dad gets a bit frustrated with that sometimes, but Mum says that so much has changed and that there's so much to relearn and rediscover that she's almost glad that her body needs her to take things slowly right now."
Holly nodded sympathetically. "I can understand that. I'm guessing you're planning to have a quiet Christmas, then?"
"We were, but now the Malfoys invited all of us to their Christmas Ball," Neville replied, his brows drawn together. "They always invited my grandmother, of course, but they never bothered with me. I always assumed they thought me too much of a Squib…"
"Neville, don't say that! You're just as much a wizard as I am a witch," Holly protested sharply.
"Thank you, Holly, but I think you're the only one who would say that," Neville replied softly. "I'm always the last to figure out new spells and sometimes I think the only magical thing about me is how often I manage to trip over my own two feet."
He smiled self-deprecatingly, but Holly didn't like the barely hidden hurt underneath. "I will not allow you to talk about my friend like that! You're kind and generous, brave and loyal to a fault and I know for a fact how incredibly – and rightfully – proud your parents are to have you as their son because they told me so themselves."
Neville blushed tomato-red, ducking his head and stuffing a spoonful of mashed potatoes in his mouth and then promptly started choking. Holly suppressed a sigh, drawing her wand and muttering an Anti-Choke Charm that Madam Pomfrey had recommended for these cases. Neville's airways cleared immediately and he gulped in a few grateful breaths.
"Thanks," he said, taking a cautious sip from his pumpkin juice. "You're a really good friend, Holly."
"So are you, Neville," she replied with an encouraging smile. "Have you thought about maybe joining Rudolphus and Rabastan's Martial Arts class? I think that could really help your confidence and your body awareness. Or are your parents against that?"
"What? No, they'd be fine with that. They – the Lestranges, I mean – even offered my parents a Life Debt to make reparations for what they did, you know? But Mum and Dad talked it over and decided that that Debt was already repaid when Rabastan allowed my Mum to send me through the Floo… No, I'm just not sure I'd be any good at it?"
"Why don't you just come to my next private lesson with them?" Holly offered. "This way, you can see if you might like it and I'm sure Rudolphus and Rabastan would be happy to give you some pointers."
"Really? Are you sure they wouldn't mind?"
"A hundred percent, they'd be delighted," Holly promised. "I usually have training with them on Tuesday evenings – you should come. Even Hermione came with me once. Ron, too."
"Okay, then, I'll come," Neville agreed with a shy, grateful smile. "And Ron's really sorry, you know? He came back before dinner."
Holly sighed, morosely poking at her serving of chocolate pudding. "I know. I'm just not sure if he's sorry for what he did… or just for getting caught."
Neville had no response for that and they passed the rest of dinner talking about training with Rudolphus and Rabastan and their expectations for the Malfoy Christmas Ball, which also caught the attention of Parvati and Lavender, who had a surprising amount of information about the event without ever having attended it themselves.
§*§*§*§*§
She did agree to talk to Ron when they returned to the common room after dinner and she had to admit that he did look miserable and had clearly been made to pay dearly for his mistake by his family and in particular by the twins and Ginny. He had spent the days at home, inundated by chores, tormented by pranks and screamed at through Howlers and he very earnestly assured her that he had learned his lesson and that he would never violate her trust or her privacy like that again.
Holly wanted to believe him, forgive him and move on. But it wasn't that easy. And she thought that was at least in part because this didn't feel so much like an aberration, a one-time slip-up, as a continuation of Ron's usual pattern of seeing her for the scar on her forehead and not as his friend. She wasn't quite ready to swallow that hurt yet and she finally told the redhead as much.
"What does that mean?" Ron asked morosely.
"It means I need time – and that I expect you to respect that," Holly replied, crossing her arms over her chest and staring Ron down. "How long did you have that photo? Since last year, at least, right? I think it's only fair that you allow me more than two weeks to try and forgive you."
Ron grumbled something under his breath, only to break off abruptly when Hermione elbowed him sharply in the side and sent him a matching glare.
"Ow… kay," he muttered, rubbing his side and exchanging a baleful look with Hermione.
Holly felt a sudden wave of gratitude for her best friend, who had clearly already taken Ron aside and talked some sense into him. Between Hermione, Mrs. Weasley and Ginny, Holly had no doubt that Ron would be made to see the full scope of what he had done to her and what he had allowed to happen to so many other students, including his sister.
She nodded approvingly before addressing Hermione. "I'm going to go see Tom for a bit, but I'll be back before curfew. And yes, I already finished my homework for tomorrow."
"It wouldn't hurt you to plan a bit further ahead," Hermione called after her in a chiding, exasperated tone, but Holly only grinned and slipped out through the portrait hole.
§*§*§*§*§
Tom greeted her with a pleased smile and a softly lingering kiss before pulling her gently further into their quarters and guiding her to take a seat on the couch next to him. Holly happily snuggled into his side, resting her cheek against his chest and feeling him settle his arm around her in a half protective, half possessive embrace.
"I'm glad you came by," Tom murmured, his fingers caressing leisurely up and down the curve of her spine. "I shouldn't have let Dumbledore distract me earlier."
"Did you come to an agreement about Nagini?" Holly asked since the giant snake was nowhere to be seen.
"I wouldn't go that far. But the school rules expressly allow me to bring my familiar to Hogwarts so Dumbledore doesn't have a leg to stand on…" Tom shrugged negligently. "Besides, Nagini won't bite any of the students and I also asked her to stay clear of any pets."
Holly hummed noncommittally, closing her eyes for a moment and enjoying Tom's warm hand that had come to rest on her stomach.
"I also talked to your godfathers," Tom informed her in a soft voice. "Black's showed me his hand – it's completely healed. And Lupin assured me that he would be keeping an eye on him regardless. Black also gave me this for you."
Holly blinked her eyes open, reaching for the small piece of parchment Tom was holding out for her, smiling when she saw the muddy pawprint and feeling something unclench in her chest. Sirius was fine. She had been worrying for nothing.
"Thank you," she murmured, snuggling back against Tom's side before she remembered that there had been another reason for her to come here tonight.
"What is it, kitten? You suddenly tensed up. Are you in pain? Do you need me to call a healer?" Tom asked with clear worry, sitting up a little straighter and peering at her.
"I need to ask a favour. And I don't think you're going to like it," Holly whispered, resisting the instinctive urge to curl up to present the smallest possible target for any outbursts of anger.
Tom's tense posture relaxed, incongruously, and he smiled at her. "You can ask me for anything, Holly. And if it's in my power to give, I will do so without hesitation."
Holly took a deep breath, twisting her fingers together. "I don't want to see you this Wednesday. At all. I don't want to talk to you, or kiss you. I don't want notes or flowers or chocolates. I don't want anyone to pass on your greetings. For this one day, I want to pretend that you don't exist."
Tom was silent for a moment, thoughtful rather than angry. "May I enquire… does your request have anything to do with the fact that Wednesday is Halloween and the anniversary of your parents' death at my hands?"
Holly nodded jerkily, surprised when Tom gently stilled the fiddling of her hands with one of his own. "Okay, kitten, I shall make myself scarce. Thank you for telling me. Is there anything…?"
"I don't do anything special, really," Holly admitted softly. "My aunt never talked about it, so I didn't know the exact date for a long time and now… I don't want to remember them for the day they died. I want to remember them because they were my parents and they loved me and I miss them. I just don't know how I'd feel, with you there, and I don't want to lash out…"
"I wouldn't mind, Holly."
"But I would mind if I felt like I had to apologise to you," Holly pointed out, managing a wry grin when Tom chuckled.
"I can understand that. After all, you do righteous anger so well, it must be difficult for you to apologise," he said, dropping a kiss onto her temple and only grinning when she twisted away with a sharp, "Hey!"
"Name one instance where you apologised to me," Tom challenged.
"I apologised for attacking you after the duel," Holly replied after a short hesitation. "And anyway, it's not my fault you claimed the lion's share of being wrong!"
"I hope you know that you're the only one who's allowed to talk to me like that," Tom said teasingly, hinting at pinching her in the side before pulling her more firmly into his arms.
"And I feel so very special," Holly muttered sarcastically, throwing her legs over Tom's to get a bit closer.
"You should," Tom agreed easily, carding his fingers gently through her hair and holding her like she was something unbelievably precious and special.
"I told Hermione that I'd be back before curfew," Holly mumbled sleepily. "But this is nice. Can I stay a bit longer?"
"Of course, my little kitten. Rest. I'll walk you back to your common room when it's time," Tom promised softly, summoning a blanket to make her even more comfortable.