Chapter 7 - Far Away

Author's Note: Anakin-Maul bonding. :)

~ Amina Gila

Maul doesn't quite know what to think of all this, but right now, he's just relieved that they have Anakin back, after so long. They haven't been apart nearly as long as they knew each other, but still, it's been so long since he last had his padawan at his side. But now, he's... admittedly worried that Anakin may have been more influenced by the Sith than he thought.

Of course, Anakin's always wanted to help people, but something about this is... Obi-Wan obviously hurt him. And he knows what Sith are, so why does he seem so attached to him? At the same time, it's clear Obi-Wan does care for him on some twisted level, if how he was fighting the Sith Master is anything to go by – even if he obviously has his own purposes for what he was doing.

"I can re-braid your hair now," Maul comments.

"Can you?" Anakin asks, perking up.

He nods, and they move to the 'fresher. He did this for him once before, braiding the padawan braid, then helping him cut the rest. It's weird seeing as he's never done anything with hair before – since he doesn't have any of his own – but still.

"Can you tell me what happened?" he requests, as he works.

Anakin shifts, crossing his arms – he hasn't seemed this uncomfortable around Maul since after he first came to the Temple, and he doesn't like it. What has the Sith been telling him?

"He – he took me to his master, but then, he came back and took me out. He said he – he wanted to teach me the Dark Side. And he said he didn't want to leave me with Plagueis. He thought if he took me back to the Jedi, his master would still find me."

Maul can't help the derisive noise that escapes him. "If he truly believed that, then why did he send you back now?"

Anakin hesitates, for a moment again. "He's scared, I think."

"... Scared?"

Anakin shifts, turning so he can look up at him, even if he doesn't meet his eyes – he never does that, for some reason. Maul's hands momentarily pause on trying to finish up with his hair. "He said the Jedi would – would hurt him. Would they?"

"The Council would... likely have imprisoned him, yes," Maul concedes, "We have little reason to trust him."

"But he just wanted our help."

"He is the one who killed Qui-Gon." And that, Maul can never forget.

Anakin's face falls, and somehow that hurts. "I know," he whispers, "But he – he said he was given orders. He's not a slave, but I think it's close."

Oh. Well... Maul pauses, considering. It's not that he doesn't trust the boy's judgment, but he's been gone so long, he could easily have been... brainwashed. Still, one thing is obvious. "You miss him, don't you?" he asks, trying to keep his tone gentle.

"I – yes." He's mildly surprised at the bluntness, but the boy's always been... honest like that. Unless it's about something he thinks he'll be beaten for. "I don't understand why this is wrong. Why are the Jedi and Sith fighting?"

Maul sighs, quietly. "You showing him... compassion is not wrong." He moves to crouch in front of him, so they're at eye level. He hates how his own words make it feel like he's betraying Qui-Gon. It's the truth. It's just that he has something personal against the Sith that could never change, but he knows he can't let those feelings interfere with his duty as a Jedi. That's easier said than done, though. "In the past, the Sith fought and massacred the Jedi. They have been trying to destroy us for millennia."

Anakin frowns. "I don't understand. Why?"

Honestly? "People don't always need a good reason for fighting and causing chaos," Maul replies dryly.

"But... Obi-Wan didn't do any of that. He left his – his master."

He lays a hand on the boy's shoulder, briefly. "He didn't," Maul agrees, "And after this, the Council might consider handling the situation differently. I do not know."

Anakin nods, though he still doesn't look happy.

"What?"

"His master could get him again. We won't be able to help."

It's strange, hearing him caring about this Sith so much. "He's survived this long. I'm sure he'll be fine. And is he really... Mandalorian?"

Anakin hesitates a moment before nodding again.

That's... not good. He'll have to talk to the Council about that later. If there's a chance Mandalore is doing something against the Jedi, that would be disastrous.

Maul stands, finally, moving to finish up Anakin's braid, considering the situation in silence as he works. "Here, it's all fixed."

Anakin moves to the mirror instantly, leaning against the counter as he looks at it. And for the first time since this all began, he actually smiles.

It warms something in Maul, to see. He had no idea how much he missed the boy until he has him again. (He wants to – to he doesn't even know. Hold him maybe? And just... But he ignores the thought.) "You have been gone a long time. There is much to catch up on."

"Obi-Wan taught me how to use a real lightsaber," Anakin says, perking up.

Unease twists sharply in him. Just what else has the Sith taught Anakin? "Why don't you show me once you we get back?"

**w**

Obi-Wan should've known the Jedi wouldn't actually be able to do anything against Plagueis – of course, the Muun is twisting this into Jedi trespassing on an important Muun's property for no reason, and despite the testimonies they have, they don't have much proof. At least not enough for someone so wealthy. Obi-Wan should've known that would happen. He doesn't care for the problems it's caused the Jedi, but he does care that his master is still out there, and he'll have to hide from him.

Maybe it's better if Anakin is with the Jedi. Because, at the end of the day, Plagueis' focus is going to be on Obi-Wan first.

But that doesn't stop how much he misses him. Everywhere he looks in the ship, he's expecting to see the boy there. But he's not, and... The only thing he has left from him is the silly tooka, Twilight.

It's ridiculous how he's moved the thing to his own room to just... look at. It still feels a little of Anakin's presence, and he... tries to go to the other bedroom on the ship rarely, so it will stay feeling of him.

It shouldn't be possible to miss him so much when Obi-Wan didn't even know him long. For now, he'll keep doing what he was before, bounty hunting, but it all feels pointless now.

He probably should see his parents again to let them know the details of what happened, but... he's not too keen on admitting to them what really happened. That he let Anakin go back to the Jedi, in the hopes it would keep him safe from the Sith – even if it might make him an enemy of Mandalore.

Besides, right now, there's nothing they can do except continue to wait. The Jedi have their eyes on Plagueis right now, which, in a way, is good. They'll never see it when Palpatine stabs them in the back, because he's just an ordinary politician.

But right now, what he wishes most of all is that he could get Anakin back. But Anakin isn't coming back, and he needs to accept that. He's lived nearly his entire life without him. When the time comes, he'll find him. It's not like he's the only apprentice Obi-Wan could have – but he doesn't want any other apprentice.

So, for now, all he can do is... wait. And brood.

**w**

It's been so long since he last saw the Temple. It feels like he's getting used to living here all over again, which... Anakin doesn't much like, because he never fit in, in the first place. He will have so much to catch up on again, and it was bad enough last time.

He was always so lonely here, except for Maul. Not that that was any different when he was with the Sith, but he never constantly felt the unwanted stares that he does now that he's back here again.

And somehow, the stares seem even stronger than before, but no one actually says anything to him as he joins Maul in the training room. "We should begin with meditation," his master decides.

Nervousness instantly flips inside of him, but he dutifully settles on the floor next to him, anyway. He hasn't meditated in the Jedi way for so long that he doesn't know if he'll be able to do it properly. At first, he tried to practice doing that when Obi-Wan wasn't around, but he couldn't very well try to keep being a Jedi and learn to be a Sith at once.

Anakin tries to reach for that inner calm that he always used to, but he instinctively finds himself focusing on his emotions instead. Especially when he misses his mother and Obi-Wan so much. It's a constant sharp ache in his chest that's been reawakened – just like it was the first few months after coming to the Temple – and just 'letting go' isn't working.

He has to please his master, though, but he's certain he already feels the very disapproving look on him.

"Anakin..." Maul interrupts, finally.

His eyes fly open again, and he bites down on his lip. "I –"

"He trained you much in the Dark Side, did he not."

Tentatively, Anakin nods. "I didn't want it," he blurts, in a rush, "But he wouldn't let me say no, and I didn't –" He was too scared to say no, even if he should have. Even if he's more scared now that he didn't, because he doesn't know what it will mean. (Qui-Gon told him he was free, but sometimes, he still thinks he has no idea what that means. Something was supposed to change, but it doesn't feel like anything did. It feels like it always did... like he's desperately seeking for his master's approval for something, even if he knows now that he doesn't have to constantly expect a beating.)

"It's alright," Maul assures, "You have not gone far. You can still learn to let it go, but I imagine it will take time."

He nods, past his own disappointment. He's already so far behind; how is he gonna catch up if he has to keep starting over?! (What if he doesn't want to catch up? What if he just wants to go back to Obi-Wan, but with Maul there, too?)

Closing his eyes, Anakin tries to reach into the Force again. He feels Maul's coal-like presence touch his, the calm darkness of it somehow helping, at least in grounding him.

And so, he tries again, to find his center, and meditate in the Jedi way, how his master wants of him.

"You are making progress," Maul tells him, when they stop a while later, "Is it getting easier?"

"A little," Anakin replies, though he wishes everything would just stop hurting. It's more exhausting than physical injuries. But he's used to working past any discomfort, so he does, following Maul to the sparring salles instead.

This, at least, he is excited for.

"Do I hafta use a training 'saber?" he can't help but protest.

Maul huffs out a breath. "Do not even tell me he had no problem with letting you use a full-powered lightsaber."

"I can do it!" he insists, trying to shake off the slight sting of the words. Why does Maul think he can't? Fine. Then he'll prove he's ready.

"I am certain you can, but it is a matter of safety," he replies, firmly.

He just has to learn faster and be better. He knows that. But maybe even if he's way behind in everything else, at least he can show his master how much he's learned in this.

Anakin practices out all the moves he's been taught and learned, waiting for Maul to... say something. He can't tell if his master is pleased or not, and it's putting him on edge. Why would he be... disappointed in him? He's too afraid to actually ask, though.

"You are... doing well," Maul notes, finally, "You have learned much."

He still doesn't seem happy, though, and that... stings.

"We'll focus on other areas of your training for now," his master decides.

**w**

Since what Anakin needs to focus on most is his other schoolwork, he spends a lot of his time in Maul's room, working alongside him, like he used to. His master hasn't had to go on any missions yet, and he's glad of that – he doesn't want to face the other students now. He hears enough whispers whenever he passes by. It was true before, but it seems worse now.

It's later in the evening when he's heading to his master's quarters again, after eating, pausing when he sees someone talking to Maul right outside his room.

"You may be required to testify," the Jedi Master is saying, "Damask is causing quite the uproar in the Senate. Even the word of those we recused does not seem sufficient – he has already had them declared medically and mentally incompetent for their word to be valid."

"If it's necessary, I will do what I must," Maul replies, sighing, "Will this... mean anything for the Order?"

"We don't know yet," the master replies, "But I'll keep you updated. The situation is very... delicate."

Anakin fidgets, watching as the master disappears down the hall. This is all happening because of him. Because he let himself get captured. Now the Order itself is in trouble?

"I... didn't mean to be a problem," Anakin says quietly, approaching.

Maul starts, as though not expecting his sudden approach. "You're not a 'problem', Anakin. You never have been," he promises, firmly.

"I let myself get captured before," he replies. And it's happened repeatedly. He has no idea what's wrong with him. How is he ever supposed to be a Jedi if that keeps happening?

"That was not your fault. Come." Maul motions for him to follow, and they head into his bedroom.

"But this... it's causing a big problem for everyone now, right?" he asks.

"We found the Sith. That's a good thing," Maul responds, firmly, "Now, we only need to find a way to prove it, and... when you deal with people this wealthy, it is often hard for any proof to be expected. But that is not your responsibility."

Oh.

Well.

That makes a little more sense. Of course, that he has... money would affect everything. That's true with the Hutts, too.

"But... I thought slavery wasn't allowed in the Republic," he objects. Wouldn't people at least want to look into it?

"It's not, but how much it's enforced is a different story," Maul replies.

"But isn't that our job?"

"One of many. There are not enough Jedi to stop all the corruption in the Republic and help everyone." He motions to the desk. "Come on. I think you can get a little more work done before bedtime."

Anakin immediately moves to join his master at the table, and they get to work.

Evening comes quickly.

Maul's always insistent about him going to bed strangely early compared to what he was used to sometimes on Tatooine – If he had a lot of work to do then, Watto would always force him to stay up as late as needed to get it down, but neither of his... newer masters have been like that. He's always up early in the morning anyway, though. He's too used to being up that early.

"Alright, bedtime," his master decides finally, glancing at the clock, "It's getting late. Do you want me to take you back to your room?"

Anakin hesitates for a moment. Actually, what he really wants is – "Can I stay here?"

He's snuck into his master's bedroom a couple times during the night, to sleep on the floor next to his bed, because he didn't want to be alone, and he'd missed Mom so much.

"If you want," Maul offers.

Anakin stretches out on the floor without being asked, next to the bed.

Maul sits on the edge of it, staring down at him. "You know, you can sleep in the bed, if you want to."

Something he's still slightly uncertain about. The bed is pretty small anyway – since it's only intended for one person, and he's not kicking his master out of bed. Especially given that he still doesn't know how much he likes beds. It's nice to be on something so soft, but it's... weird. "It's okay," he replies, rolling over to find a more comfortable position.

"Fine," Maul concedes, grudgingly, tossing a pillow onto his head, a look of obvious amusement on his face, "Take this, at least."

Anakin lets out a startled squeak but catches it. Maul leans over, dropping the blanket over him next.

... Well, this is fine too.

**w**

Anakin knew he'd have to go to class with the other padawans again, but that doesn't mean he was looking forward to it.

Especially not when... he's supposed to be sparring against several training droids in front of a group of other padawans, and he'd accidentally drawn on the Dark Side. It was more than just touching, and he can't say what triggered it, it just – happened, and he'd crushed one of them with the Force.

"I will have to speak with your master about this," the teacher told him, clearly angry, "Wait here." And all he could do was step outside the room to wait, feeling that never-ending shame of – of being lesser crawling though him. He already knows it's true, because none of the other students here were slaves, and none of them would ever violate the Jedi beliefs like that.

The teacher has left to... find Maul, presumably, and Anakin shifts from foot to foot nervously, near the entrance. He knows he's in trouble now, and he doesn't know what that will mean.

Several of the other padawans are whispering loudly a short distance away, and he can clearly make out their voices, enough to know they're talking about him.

"... He's probably a real Sith now," one of them is saying, disgustedly.

"He was with the Sith," another points out.

"... always been a slave to his emotions..."

"... actually thinks he belongs here..."

Just a slave. He would've reacted, instantly, except – lashing out would be the Dark Side, but that doesn't stop the urge to – to do it. Maybe they aren't wrong. Maybe he really doesn't belong here. (He misses Obi-Wan. At least with him, things... made a little more sense.)

"Did you become a Sith?" a voice asks, loudly, right behind him, and he starts, spinning as a hand grabs his arm. He flings out a hand without thinking, punching blindly.

It's one of the other padawans, an Ictotchi boy, and he stumbles back with a startled yelp, expression instantly turning to anger before hitting back.

Within seconds, they're exchanging punches on the floor. And Anakin's actually winning... until he's not. A couple other students move forwards, saying something about "stopping the Sith", before they jump him.

With so many of them there, it's hard to fight them all off, even if he's definitely a better fighter than any of them. He had to be, to survive on Tatooine.

"What's going on here?" a voice demands, sharply.

Maul.

"He started it," one of the others calls, hastily disentangling themselves from the fight.

"I didn't ask who started it," Maul replies, sharply, "Does that justify all of you attacking another padawan?"

Anakin is... mildly surprised that he's only talking to the others right now, as he shakily climbs to his feet.

The others look decidedly guilty now, saying nothing.

"And I will be having a word with your masters later," Maul adds, looking between them.

Master.

Somehow, he doesn't think he knows what it's like to have anything else.

One of his eyes must be swelling badly, because it hurts, and his field of vision is definitely narrower than it ought to be. He reaches up to touch it, lightly – Well, it doesn't hurt nearly as badly as that time he broke his legs.

It's hard to see out of it though, and it's making everything blurry.

"He's a Sith," one of the other students mutters, sullenly.

"Is name calling appropriate?" Maul asks, steely, staring them down.

None of them say anything, and he finally turns away. "Come," Maul instructs, touching Anakin's shoulder briefly as he guides him away down the hall.

"Master, I..." Anakin begins, hesitantly.

"We can speak in my room," he replies, and Anakin closes his mouth again, swallowing back his fear.

They get there soon enough, though. "Are you alright?" he asks, frowning as he leads him into the 'fresher, and gets to work on his... injuries.

Anakin nods.

"What happened?" Maul queries, as he works. Though Anakin rather thinks they're wasting bacta for putting it on bruises.

At least he's... letting him explain.

"I – I wasn't thinking and I – used the Dark Side. I'm sorry," Anakin blurts.

"And the... fight?"

"They called me a Sith," Anakin mumbles. And then one of them touched him, and... But he doesn't know how to explain that part. It's happened before, and Maul never really understood, even if he... wasn't harsh about it.

Maul lets out a quiet sigh. "I should have expected... The other students do not understand. They were wrong to say that, Anakin. And you know it's untrue. You may have used the Dark Side, but you are still young. Your struggles are natural, especially with what happened."

But – but... Sometimes, he's so confused, especially about this whole Sith thing. Everybody here hate the Sith, and it still feels wrong to be that like that to someone of different beliefs, even if he knows he shouldn't be questioning such thing. But Obi-Wan... he wasn't evil. It doesn't make sense. Nothing does.

"You don't belong here."

What if they're not wrong? He left Mom because he wanted to be a Jedi, to help people, but now... He doesn't know anymore.

"Although, I do not believe I need to repeat that fighting is not the answer," he adds.

"I know, Master."

Maul squeezes his shoulder, gently. Sometimes, Anakin thinks he's been strangely more physically affectionate since Anakin's return, than he ever was before. "But given the circumstances, I can... understand why you would have reacted like that. And it was no more right for the others to hurt you like this." He sighs. "But we must work on your... control of the Force. The other masters are commenting."

Anakin glances down, eyes listlessly tracing the tiles on the floor.

He wants this to be over.

He misses Mom and Obi-Wan, and he can't imagine continuing to live like this. He doesn't want to do this anymore, and that's – It's jarring as the realization truly sinks in for the first time. He doesn't want to be here. He's not giving up. He just... Maybe there's another way he can learn the Force and be able to help people.

But how could he tell his master that? When it was Maul who was with Qui-Gon who freed him, and – That would be ungrateful, after what the Jedi did to him. He doesn't know if he can just opt to leave, anyway, but he – he wants to. He wants to find Mom and Obi-Wan.

"What is it?" Maul asks, studying him, his hands strangely gentle on his face as he finishes dealing with the injuries.

"I – I miss Mom. And Obi-Wan," he blurts.

"Being a Jedi means... sacrifice. It is never easy, but you can grow accustomed to it in time."

"I wanted to help people. But we're... not."

"We have spoken of this before, haven't we?"

It would be easier if he wanted to do something other than cry. "I think... other ways might be easier."

"Anakin..." Maul steps back, and Anakin fights to the urge to instantly say something to placate him. "What are you... considering?"

"I – I want to find Obi-Wan," he admits, finally.

"You know the Council will not allow that."

"I can leave," Anakin offers, quietly. "I – Not forever, but right now, I –"

The shock that flits across the Zabrak's face nearly makes him want to contradict himself again, but he can't... keep doing this. Not when it's not helping anyone.

"He's a Sith." The way they say it like it's a curse is what has him most shaken up. It's just... Jedi shouldn't be like that. Right?

"Anakin, you know this is a very significant decision. I understand you are upset, but perhaps you should wait to think about it until you are... calmer."

Maybe he should be he doesn't want to wait. He'll do as Maul asks, but he doesn't think he's going to change his mind.

He can't.

**w**

Maul still feels numb with shock over his conversation with Anakin. He was hoping it would change overnight, if he's being honest, but it didn't. Anakin is serious about leaving, and it is his choice to make. If he wants to leave, he can.

And that... The only person Maul can go to is Master Yoda.

"I don't know what to do," he admits, "I'm afraid the Sith have influenced him greatly, but he has genuine reasons for not wanting to stay here. I don't think he ever could fit in among the Jedi." Not without getting hurt more in the process. Sometimes, Maul wonders how Qui-Gon couldn't've seen that.

"Mm... clouded, his future has always been," Yoda murmurs, gravely.

"What should I do?"

"If desire to leave he does, his choice it is," the Grandmaster reminds.

"But if he leaves, the Sith could reach him far more easily," Maul objects.

Really, that's what scares him most. Maul already knows that if Anakin goes, he's leaving with him, even if he has no idea what that will mean for his future. All he can do is hope it really won't be permanent.

That doesn't change how it feels like he's failed him, because he should have... taught him better. And protected him. Qui-Gon asked Maul to train him as his dying wish, and now, he has no idea if he'll be able to keep that. (Especially not if they'll be around the person who killed Qui-Gon.)

"Watch over him closely, you must, and contact us, if sighted again, the Sith are," Yoda replies.

Maul doesn't know what stops him from saying that he thinks Anakin's going to be going straight to the younger Sith. And that, he has no idea what to do about. Perhaps he could... persuade him to go to his mother instead. Maybe. He doesn't know what to do anymore, but all he knows is that he needs to keep Anakin safe. And that also means keeping him from Falling, even if he's... friends with a Sith. Somehow.

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