Prolog: Careless Words
Broken bones may heal and mend, but words will hurt until the end.
_
Bakugo felt cold, despite the hot summer weather.
He hadn't really meant it. He had no idea that Deku... no, Izuku... would take his words to heart. But it was clear from the letter he left that Bakugo's words- so carelessly spoken all those months ago in the classroom- had left a scar in the aspiring hero's mind.
He hadn't really meant it! He was, not for the first time, trying to push Izuku away; push him to give up on becoming a hero, because it was too dangerous for someone without a quirk, no matter how much you studied and took notes.
But regardless of meaning it or not, it was his fault.
His fault that Izuku Midoriya had jumped off that bridge.
After studying for months, even working out to gain strength, so much so that Bakugo even found himself almost rooting for him, Izuku had gone through with taking the UA Entrance Exam.
While he had passed the written exam with flying colors, rivaling even the expected top students, he had absolutely bombed the practical exam, almost getting killed and had to be saved by the teachers, having nearly been crushed by one of the giant robots.
They denied his entry to the school of course. He ended up having to go to a regular school. It clearly tore at him. For months, he seemed to be a mere husk, only getting out of bed to go to school, eat and go to the bathroom. After a while, he started skipping classes, or just staying home. After a year had passed, he had stopped going to school altogether.
He had heard from his mother how depressed Izuku had gotten and all he could think at the time was how much of a waste it was to wallow in self pity. He had looked down on him. So his childhood dream had been ruined, but it wasn't like he wasn't good at anything else. He could have become a police officer, or a detective. Those were admirable professions. But Bakugo never tried to approach. Never tried to motivate his former friend to seek a new dream. He thought, eventually, he'd get through the slump and find another calling.
But he hadn't.
Inko had pushed for him to seek help, to go to a therapist. And he had, for a time, but it didn't last.
The only times he seemed happy would be days he woke up to go on a walk. There was no routine to it, always random, at any time of day. He'd wake up, eat, chat with his mother for an hour or so, and then go for a walk. At first it was a blessing to her; hope that he was recovering. But after a while she noticed he would come back in more of a depressed state than normal, eyes puffy and red, and he'd go right to bed.
It was the 8th time he had done this that he didn't return home.
It only took a few hours to find out what had happened.
He'd woken up early, 4 in the morning. Inko was always quick to wake up when she heard his door opening. He seemed happy. Inko was hesitantly happy too, glad to see his mood improved, and wanted to enjoy it with him, but dreading the state he'd be in when he came home. They talked for 2 hours, Deku recalling his younger years, of "coming to her rescue", dressed in his All Might onesie. Joking about how many views he alone had added to the video of All Might's rescue.
At 6, he kissed her on the cheek and hugged her, bid her a good day, and then walked out.
At 10, Inko was opening the door to the officers, their faces grave.
Before they had even said anything, Inko was crying, falling to her knees.
He had jumped off a bridge. During an hour nobody would be passing by, so he wouldn't be persuaded to stop.
He had with him a slightly charred notebook, full of notes he had taken on heroes, tactics they used, and how he'd use their powers if he had them, or what known villains would be strong or weak against them. Nearly all the written pages contained this, except for the last entry.
"I can't take it anymore. I'll just hope for the best in the next life."
It was all his fault.