WARNING(S): Minor injuries, very rapidly going from enemies to lovers in the span of five minutes

A/N: Okay, I suppose my DBZ hyperfixation is coming back with a vengeance, and it's especially apparent here. But in my defense, I spent a lot of time as a teenager dreaming up a DBZ AU for Naruto or a Naruto AU for DBZ, especially when trying to blend elements/characters from both.

An explosion rippled along the earth, making the women in the kitchen take pause from finishing the dishes.

"Ah," said Hinata, wiping her hands on the towel hanging off of the dishwasher. "Naruto must be home."

"You think?" Squinting out the window at the cloud of dust that had been kicked up from the pod's landing

"Well, Neji wished to remain on the moon colony for another year, and Prince Sasuke has been staying with you, so…" trailing off, the dark-haired princess shrugged.

Sakura opened her mouth to reply, but a triumphant shout of "SAKURA-CHAN!" made her nod along. "Y'know what, you're right."

Giggling behind a dainty hand, Hinata grabbed the glass of lemonade that had just been poured, heading out of the kitchen and out the back door. The pink-haired young woman followed closely behind.

As soon as they were outside, an energetic blond leapt out of the pod, making the ground shift a little with the force of his jump. He landed before them with a grin. "I'm back!"

"Welcome back," the pink-haired healer greeted as Hinata handed him the glass. "What did you find this time?"

Naruto mumbled something into the lemonade before downing it in one gulp, swiping the side of his hand across his upper lip with a satisfied sigh. "Not much, actually. What I do know is that Orochimaru's followers are still scattered around the universe. So far I haven't seen any more planets with Namekians."

"So that means we're stuck with only two sets of Dragon Balls," Hinata remarked with a disappointed sigh. "Thank you for searching anyway, Naruto."

"No prob!" He chirped, handing the glass back. "Hey, so where's Sasuke? I wanna see how strong he's gotten since I left!"

Despite herself, the rosette chuckled. "His royal highness is training in the gravity room, if you wanna follow suit."

"Great! Thanks!" Loosely wrapping an arm around her shoulders for a second - as well as quick peck to his pale-eyed wife's cheek, he darted off in the direction of the chamber.

"Don't forget that you owe me if you destroy it again! Tenten will eviscerate you and I won't be the one to heal it!" She shouted after him, getting a faraway cry of agreement.

Hinata watched him go with a soft smile. "They really are Saiyans, aren't they?"

"To the bone," her companion deadpanned, causing the princess to giggle.

"Five hours," Sakura griped as she focused on wrapping the gaping hole in the prince's back. "Naruto has been back five hours, Sasuke."

"I couldn't tell," he quipped sarcastically, grunting in pain as she tightened her hold on the medical wrap. "Would it kill you to be a little more gentle?"

"Would it kill you to treat Tenten's gravity chamber with respect?" She retorted.

Sasuke said nothing in return, and an awkward silence fell upon them as she firmly tucked away the last piece. Nodding firmly at her work, she set upon working on that burn on his forearm.

The warm glow of her ki enveloped his scarred flesh, and the young prince closed his eyes and basked in the comforting aura.

"... Hey," she began hesitantly. "So… you're… not gonna try to blow up the Earth again, right?"

There was a pregnant pause.

"... It depends on the threat," he answered slowly, "why?"

"For your sake you'd better be joking." Grumbling under her breath, Sakura shot him a dirty look. "I was just thinking."

He hummed in response.

"... you're not gonna ask?"

"Should I?" Wrinkling his nose, he finally looked up at her through his bangs.

"Oh my Guardian you Saiyans are dense." Though it was quiet, exasperated, he still cast her an annoyed frown as she heaved a sigh and tried again. "I was thinking. What's stopping you from gathering the Dragon Balls and… I dunno… wishing for immortality or something?"

Sasuke's brow furrowed, and he looked away with a pensive noise deep in his throat. "I… hadn't considered that an option," he answered. "I don't know. I could wish for immortality."

"So…?" The young woman goaded.

He shrugged - and then remembered halfway through the motion that she was still healing his arm. "I don't know why I haven't thought to do it."

"Maybe it's a sign you're finally letting go of your grudge!" With a smile, she nudged him in the side.

The answering scowl she got made her bark a laugh. "Or not! I guess I shouldn't expect you two to get too buddy-buddy yet."

"I'm not his… buddy," the prince tersely answered.

"Not yet you aren't." Sakura rolled her eyes. "Y'know that Gaara tried to kill him once. Tried. Now you'd never know they were never friends."

"We are not friends. I still despise him for beating me."

"Yeah, well, denial is a river in Egypt and - hoo, you are paddling along it without a care in the world right now."

Sasuke's face scrunched up in confusion. "But… I'm not in a-"

"Metaphors, Sasuke…" she patted the arm she'd just finished healing. "You'll get them one day."

He continued to watch her get up and move across the room, clearly contemplating what she'd said.

As she put the medical supplies away, his eyes widened and he nodded. "Oh. I suppose I am, ah… how did you put it?"

"Paddling up the river of denial without a care in the world?"

"Yes, that." He hummed. "I've never heard that one before."

"I mixed two idioms together." She didn't look up from the cabinet as she put the peroxide away. "It's fun. You should try it sometime instead of wrecking our gravity chamber."

The Saiyan scowled, folding his arms with a wince of pain. "If that idiot wasn't so hellbent on goading me into going Super Saiyan…"

"You need to tell him you can't, already."

He sputtered almost indignantly over his words. "And what next? Let him win?"

"If it's what saves Tenten from days of repair and lots of valuable and expensive circuitry and paneling, and if it saves me from weeks of bitching about it, yes!" She shouted, whirling around to glower at him. "Honestly, I don't know what's more infuriating - your devil-may-care attitude or that one-sided rivalry between you!"

"I know something infuriating," he muttered angrily under his breath.

Her jaw clenched, and she took a step towards him. "What was that? You wanna repeat yourself, your Highness?"

Rising from the chair, he strode over so they were nearly nose-to-nose, electricity practically sparking and crackling in the air between them as they glared into each other's eyes.

"You are the most horrible, insufferable man I've met in my life," she spat, "and I had to grow up around Danzou."

"You don't know insufferable, Earth woman," he growled back. "I am a prince. The prince of all Saiyans. And I will not be forced to suffer this incessant nagging from the likes of you!"

"And I won't be forced to wait on you hand and foot like I'm a Guardian-damned kitchen maid. Maybe you're used to that, but newsflash dipshit, you're on Earth now! And as long as you stay under my roof, you will adhere to my rules!"

"Oh, uh, hey, Sakura-chan, quick question, where's the-" Naruto opened the door, peeking in for all of a second before slamming it shut with a yelp. "Sorry! Sorry! I'll come back another time!"

Hinata stared at him, bewildered, as he marched back down the hallway with a beet-red face. "What's wrong?"

"I- uh- well, they- um- S- Sakura-chan…" He fumbled with his words, gesturing rapidly towards the door. "L- let's just say I don't know who would've kicked my ass first if I stayed - him or her!"

Peeking past him, his wife suddenly cupped a hand over her mouth in understanding. "Oh! My, well- it sure has taken them long enough."

"I- I never wanna see that again," the blond whimpered.

Shaking her head in amusement, she gently took his arm and led him away. "Here, I've poured you more lemonade. And aren't you hungry? I feel like we have some kebabs still in the fridge…"