AN: As a response to some comments. Sure, just asking the other out would be simpler, but that would mean Logan would have to admit to himself that he also has a right to put his happiness first, despite all the guilt he feels towards his kids; and Rory would need to admit to herself that maybe having something more than fling, a thrill, wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. Neither of them is looking to "date" as such, they're not looking for love or a partner - feeling they've already had those parts of their lives, it's not something they need or crave as such - but they have this draw... So, this is the way they know how to deal with this draw without putting labels on it.

Chapter 11

The air was thick with awkward anticipation. It was close quarters too, sitting side by side in Logan's car like this, just a tentative distance between the two elbows that were positioned on the hand rest. Taking care with each movement and word, each song that played on the stereo, each degree of temperature that he adjusted.

The first five minutes of their drive had passed in unexpected silence, both being a little taken aback as to what exactly they'd gotten themselves into. It was an hour's drive there, and if Logan could figure out how to have the boat delivered, hopefully just paying someone off to do it for him, after he'd given his approval on its condition, an hour back. Maybe this was too long? Too soon? Too forced?

Logan wanted to slap himself - he was never this guy who worried like this. But why was this woman different? He couldn't quite put his finger on it.

"There's a farm down that road that grows strawberries," Rory pointed out, having for a moment struggled to think of what to say just like Logan had.

In those twenty minutes she'd taken to get ready, she'd moved her writing set up indoors, locked the doors and windows, as well as packed her famous 'you never know where you might end up' kit into her handbag that her mother had taught her and that she had adjusted to perfection over the years. The kit held make up removal wipes, first aid kit, a wrinkle free travel-minidress what worked for every setting she could imagine as a change of clothes if she ever got anything on her clothes, a granola bar, mug of iced coffee in a thermos and another one with water, sunglasses, sunscreen, miniature flask of something stronger, and a light summer scarf. Of course, there was a small book in that bag too, as there had been one ever since she'd been a teenager. She was ready for anything with that bag of hers.

She'd nervously changed into some nicer, but still comfortable clothes - her nice leggings and a comfortable tunic that showed a hint of her cleavage and opted for a comfortable pair of white sneakers.

Logan had noticed her change of clothes, appreciating the cute librarian look she had going on. Yet inside he kept wondering inside how far this 'girl scout' of a woman had taken things. The granola bar in the handbag he would've guessed right had he been asked, maybe even the sun protection and the water. But had she thought about underwear? He knew he was getting way ahead of himself, but he was a guy - he was allowed his fantasies.

"Good to know," Logan replied, but it was becoming evident to him that small talk was not what he wanted to have with her. It felt like a waste of time, and he knew they could do a lot better than that from experience.

Logan took a deep exhale, and inhaled again, before spitting out what he really was curious to ask about.

"So, that was your ex-husband this morning, right?" Logan asked.

The question made Rory muse - it was not the reaction from herself nor the question from him that she'd anticipated.

"Yes, that was my ex-husband. Tucker Peyton Culbertson. Oh, I'm sorry - Doctor Tucker Peyton Culbertson," Rory added in a slightly mocking tone.

"Peyton? Really?" Logan said, frowning, deciding to stick to mocking what he knew for now. It was evident to him that this Tucker guy was not amongst Rory's favorite people, and he was actually pretty curious to know why.

Another thing he'd thought of between their latest shopping trip and now was that unlike anyone who was dating in the traditional sense of the world, they didn't really need to avoid the topic of exes. If anything, they both understood how exes had shaped their lives and maybe even their own personalities, not that either craved to talk about the unpleasant side of things too much.

"Really," Rory confirmed, recalling how she and her mother had mocked the name, claiming it to be his only fault for quite some time.

"I used to know a guy called Payton. Payton Sanders," Logan said.

Rory laughed.

"What?" Logan asked.

"My mom dated Payton Sanders. Or well... Went on a date with him at least," Rory replied.

"You're kidding!?" Logan replied.

"No, I'm really not," Rory replied. "So how did you know him?" she inquired.

"A friend of the family, I guess. I am not actually sure what he did - something with Jaguar, I think," Logan discussed, faintly remembering him from his teenage years.

"Right. Small world," Rory chimed.

"Tell me about it," Logan said, feeling like he should've met this woman decades ago.

Logan continued to drive for a few moments, the couple of hikers on the side of the road by the Calderwood Trails providing them with a distraction, considering the road had been secluded until now.

"So, that ex-husband of yours? He's a doctor?" Logan inquired.

"You seem very fascinated with my ex, you know. You want me to set you up?" Rory asked, finding his questions just a little too invested in the topic. But she was willing to humor him.

Logan raised his fingers from the steering wheel. "I'm sorry. I'm just curious… we don't have to talk about him," Logan assured, showing his surrender on the topic.

"But no, not a medical doctor at least. Just his PhD is kind of a big deal to him," Rory replied, not wanting to discourage him.

"Oh, an academic? Yale?" Logan inquired, knowingly.

"Yup," Rory said, popping the 'p'. "And no, not anymore. Harvard," she added.

"Sell-out!" Logan said, sounding like a real Bulldog.

"Yeah, you could say that," Rory chuckled.

"Any other reason why I shouldn't like him?" Logan inquired, wondering essentially what the cause of their divorce had been.

"Well, he hates that I moved back to Hartford for a job. At the same time, he was the one to uproot all three of us once when he first got the offer from Harvard some years earlier. His job was always more important than mine… Never liked this place much either," Rory shared.

"Hate him already," Logan replied, adding a low chuckle.

"It wasn't anything too dramatic, you know," Rory sensed herself opening up to Logan. If they were going to talk about these things, she just wanted to get it over with.

Logan shot her a questioning look.

"We just grew apart, prioritized different things… every little thing about him annoyed me in the end," Rory described. "Plus, he was beginning to develop a temper… I am not sure what that was. Maybe it was even justified with all the nagging I found myself doing. So not my proudest time," Rory added, apologetically.

There had also been the topic of money – he hadn't liked the fact that Rory had it, feeling somehow like he needed to prove himself in every other way because of it. But Rory felt this wasn't something relevant to Logan.

"He never hurt you or anything?" Logan felt he just had to ask. That would really make him hate the guy.

"No, nothing like that. Just a little too much drinking. Trashing things," Rory replied, feeling strangely embarrassed of the fact. But she decided to be honest about it. "But after that one time I was out of there like that," Rory said, snapping her fingers. She hadn't waited around for it to get any worse after that. She, unlike many women in similar situations, had had the money to make other arrangements at the snap of her fingers.

"Well, good," Logan assured.

"He's doing better as far as I can tell. But we're still not very friendly, regardless of the fact. I think he just blames me for all of it," Rory replied.

"Well, if it helps - my ex-wife thinks I'm the biggest monster there is, so at least we have that in common," Logan noted.

Rory tried to shift her brain into neutral, not going too much into leaning on her latest theory on who Honor was, nor on the things she'd overheard the other day Logan say on the phone. Whatever this was - she wanted to hear it from him.

"Okay, I've just got to ask," Rory began, gathering her courage. "How many wives exactly are there in total?" Rory asked.

"Oh, you picked up on that, didn't you?" Logan teased. "And no, as much fun as it would be to boast with seven ex-wives. All I've got is two, and technically when it comes to the first one, I'm a widow," Logan confessed.

"Oh," Rory reacted. "I'm sorry," she added.

"Whitney was her name. She was Theo's and Liam's mother," Logan revealed, momentarily casting a withheld look towards his ring finger. While she might not had been the big love of his life, it hadn't been the all-consuming kind of love people talked about at least, he had loved her. And he owed the lives of his sons to her. There was guilt associated with her too – for not having been around enough, not nearly enough.

Rory hesitated but asked the question anyway, feeling like it was just about to pour over his lips anyway, but he hesitated whether to go into it, and Rory could just sense him start but stop a few times to say something more.

"What happened to her?" Rory asked, compassionately.

"There was a complication during her pregnancy with Theo. They did a C-section, but there was just too much bleeding. They couldn't save her," Logan explained, regretfully.

Rory didn't really know what to say to that, feeling like another 'Sorry' was a little redundant. The feeling of heaviness lingered over the car for a few minutes, as they drove past a pasture with a few horses, one of whom was in the mood to chase the car for the length of his fence. At least that provided a pleasant distraction.

"Not to be insensitive, but do you want to hear something funny?" Rory decided to turn her own stupidity into something she could laugh about.

"Absolutely!" Logan encouraged, having had enough of seriousness for now.

"Until this morning, I actually believed Honor and you were married," Rory spit out.

For a moment Logan was silent, trying to wrap his head around her words. But then as Rory was almost about to get a stress ulcer from the nervousness, Logan burst into laughter. Full belly laughter, nearly causing him to struggle with his driving. Thankfully, the road was empty, enabling some wiggle room.

"I just… I just assumed. You two are living in that house together right? I had no reason to believe otherwise," Rory tried to explain, as Logan continued to laugh.

A moment passed.

"But that didn't stop you, did it?" Logan asked with a smirk, stopping his laughter.

Rory bit her lip and blushed involuntarily. They were not technically speaking of flirting, dating, or being interested in each-other, but it was becoming pretty evident regardless of the fact.

Logan sensed his statement had been a bit too direct, even if he didn't regret saying it, loving how cutely she had blushed as a result. But he didn't want to make her feel bad about it either. He hadn't said it to judge her.

"Honor's my sister. She's married, god, she's been married for like 25 years or something?" Logan assured. "Josh, her husband, he just travels a lot and technically she owns the house we're living in right now," he explained. "Veronica and Oliver are their kids. With the help of a surrogate, obviously," he added, wanting to make that part clear.

"Right," Rory replied, smilingly, appreciating him not mocking her about the former.

"And my second wife. She…. I'd rather not talk about much as I just… I get mad just thinking of her. But we've been separated for years, and the divorce became final about a year ago," Logan explained.

"And she's the mother of your daughter?" Rory inquired.

"Yes," Logan replied. "But it's been a messy custody issue on that side, so…," he added, showing his reluctance on the topic.

Rory made the logical conclusion that that was the reason this other ex-wife considered him a monster. She didn't know the details of things, but she liked to assume that he wasn't a monster as such, but only appeared as such subjectively. If Tucker had attempted to take Corinne from her, she would've likely called him out for being a monster, too. At least that was what she assumed this to be about.

They drove into Brunswick, the change of scenery providing them a mental break from heavier topics.

Rory took it to another level, however, feeling like they needed a physical break too. There were few people in the world with whom she'd ever gone into such deep topics this soon, let along in the first 20 minutes of a first joint drive anywhere.

"Turn right here," Rory instructed. "I'm in the mood for some pizza," she added as an explanation, as they pulled up in front of the Portland Pie Factory.