Chapter VII: Shadows

Atem stepped into the cavern behind him and glanced around, bristling faintly. His shadow was thrown across the wall like a storm cloud, darker than he was used to, with the innocent misshapen figure any darkness cast. He glanced at Ironheart as the Judgment Dragon turned around to face him. He took a seat, seeming almost to glow in the dark, and his eyes looked like gray fireflies against his skull. Atem bristled more prominently despite himself and crept forward once more, hissing, "I am here. What is there to see?"

Ironheart studied his face and leaned forward. Atem curled his lips back to show the ridges of his teeth and barely resisted the snarl bubbling in his throat. He thumped his tail and glared, teeth aching from the pressure of keeping both mouths clamped shut.

"I grow tired of this game. What is there to see?"

The other male was silent for a long time, then sighed, "You grew through pain. I suppose the darkness surrounding you now can only help mold you further."

He stared back, unwavering but feeling small. "What does that mean?"

"It means you adapted to pain before. The one to come in the future may be much worse but you shall learn to bear it as well." Ironheart fell silent for a moment, then tilted his head. "You've truly suffered a great deal in life, haven't you?"

Atem scoffed, "Why don't you tell me, Ironheart? You see so much. Why don't you tell me the things I've gone through that others don't know?"

"I enjoy your skepticism," the Judgment Dragon laughed, eyes glittering like river water. "It makes you stronger. I can see that. It also isolates you. Your skepticism is a gift, yet a problem as well. Tell me, does Yugi know how much you doubt your stance as a God Dragon?"

He froze, bristling harder and staring blankly. "What?"

"Does he know? Does he know you despise being addressed as the God Dragon of the East for fear one day it'll be determined you are but a false deity? Does he know you're afraid if that happens, he'll be disappointed enough to leave you?"

Atem found himself too stiff to move for several long minutes. Then he snarled softly. "And you know this from my shadow?"

Ironheart snorted. "I see more than your shadow. You project less than others. It's hard to see from you what I usually can. But I understand you're a blind spot to the other God Dragons."

"Did your son enlighten you to that fact?"

"He didn't have to. If I could not see you when Yusei requested I search for a fourth God Dragon, I know they cannot. Jaden especially seems upset with that fact."

"He's a control freak."

"I am aware. He has problems understanding his limitations."

"No, he doesn't have problems understanding them. He has problems abiding by them," Atem corrected, snarling. "And I do not appreciate his presumptions toward my time nor yours."

The Judgment Dragon chuckled. "Yes, and you are anxious to return, are you not?"

He bristled and bore his teeth. "I'll kill you if you speak a word of it. He is mine. He is Yugi's. I will not hesitate to protect him in any manner I must."

"Yami"—Atem froze and stared, eyes nearly popping from his skull with shock—"is safe between us. I shall tell no one of his existence. And you shall guide and protect him as you must."

The Sky Dragon shuffled his weight, unsure. "Why do you know his name?" he managed to breathe. "I don't understand."

He chuckled and shook his head. "I can see him all around you. You laid his egg. It is only natural you would hold such claim of him."

Atem bristled and shook his head sharply. He might have accused him of having heard his name, had it not been for himself and Yugi being the only ones to know it. He tucked his wings into his sides tightly for comfort and flexed his claws awkwardly, hearts racing. No one knew that name but for the humans and Yugi—Yugi had chosen it. He'd said it, asked to name their dragonet that when they might hatch. He'd teased him about the color of his scales and…

"Relax, Atem. I mean you and your family no harm. I wanted to see the shadow that envelopes you now, but you hold too much power. I cannot see it."

"Power?" he scoffed. "I have none."

"You have a great many," the Judgment Dragon said with a firm shake of his head. "You do not understand them, I know, but I can see them. You are strong enough that I cannot read your shadow but for the most prominent force surrounding you. Your…hatchling is the only thing I can read from you clearly."

Atem stared, searching his face and wondering. What power was there? He might have been a blind spot but he didn't know why or how. He didn't even know if it was permanent or temporary. They had never seen him, but there was always the chance they'd never looked, either. They'd never considered a Sky Dragon. They'd considered every other species but his. That could have been the sole reason they'd never found him.

If they were still so close-minded on the manner, Yami would likely be safe for a while. But that relied more on himself and Yugi than it did anything else.

"Can you see him?"

Ironheart was silent for a long time, then shook his head. "No. I would not know he existed if I could not see you now. Your presence is the only thing that told me of his existence."

Atem blinked and nodded, mind racing. If Yami was a blind spot as well, perhaps that was his ability. It was sorely lacking in comparison to the other three, but it was something.

If it had passed along to Yami, he was all the better for it.

He nodded again and narrowed his eyes. "Do you see anything else?"

"No." Ironheart watched him for a long time, then shook his head and turned away. "Your pain is too crippling to see beyond."

Atem bristled. "This pain…it resides in the future?"

"It has yet to come." He looked back. His eyes were dull as pebbles when he blinked and studied him. "It will cripple you for a while, but you will survive. As you always have."

He huffed. I've bloodied my paws and run myself ragged. I've starved and I've begged for death. And I've found happiness in Yugi and the world still conspires to destroy me. He scowled and shifted his weight. Perhaps he'd been right in telling Yugi it would have been better he'd never made it beyond his years as a hatchling.

"You'll need to remember forgiveness, Atem."

"Forgiveness?" he spat. "I've never known it. Why should I offer it?"

Ironheart tilted his head but didn't respond. He turned away again after a long time and instead murmured, "I must speak to my son. I'll send another to show you all the nests."

Atem bristled. "I'll kill you," he growled, "if you speak a word of this to him. Yami is mine."

He nodded. "Yes. He is yours."

"Have you ever been far north, Atem?"

He didn't look up from where he was watching the stream trickle by his paws. "No. I've never ventured further than the outskirts of the Wind Clan territory and the very edge of this land." He considered his reflection a moment, wondering at the worn look he always had. He was so tired, exhausted to the point of desperation, and his belly ached. He wanted to lay with Yugi, to convince himself none of it was true. If he could do that, he could pretend Yami wasn't unnatural and likely to destroy everything he touched when he matured. And he could pretend he and Yugi hadn't created an abomination that likely marked death for everyone else.

How did he rectify it all?

He couldn't kill him, not when Yugi had seen him and clearly already loved him. He couldn't hurt him and hope for the best. He couldn't do that to Yugi, and Yami made no indication of violence.

He'd saved Yugi. He knew that. He remembered all too vividly.

He thought maybe, in the back of his mind, that he'd done more than that.

He'd never seen the crack in the cliffs before that moment, when he was trying to drag Yugi to shelter. He had no idea where he should have gone—where he would have gone. Yugi likely would have died had he wandered longer. And, yet, somehow…

He was alive. And Atem had found that cave.

He'd found a cave he shouldn't have known existed.

He hadn't even truly been close enough to know it was there.

But it'd been warm enough. And it had been safe.

And he'd seen it so clearly in his head, like he'd always known and it was just common knowledge he should go to it.

Had Yami done that as well?

Atem watched Yusei's reflection appear across the top of the water and ignored the urge to snarl with frustration. It was so hard to find a moment to himself with the other three around. Yugi had always let him take a few minutes to think on his own, to lay down and puzzle through whatever it was on his mind. These three hovered and interrupted and constantly spoke. He couldn't shake them when they began talking, because instinct made him wary.

Seeing Yusei so close made his claws itch. He glanced back and found the Stardust Dragon watching him curiously.

"Are you all right?"

"Yes."

"You seemed upset."

He shook his head. "It's nothing worth discussion."

Yusei fell quiet for a long moment, then tilted his head. "I know I'm not exactly the one you'd like to talk to, but I'll listen if you want."

Atem felt the smallest inkling of warmth for the offer but it faded again immediately. Yami was his secret. He wasn't going to share his existence with anyone but Yugi. Yusei might have been a good dragon to speak to and listen, but this wasn't a topic he could broach with him.

"Thank you, but I do not often reflect verbally."

It wasn't untrue. It was one of the things he knew Yugi got flustered about at times. His silence and need to think things through by himself often caused him to feel excluded. He knew that. He tried oftentimes to at least attempt to speak his troubles, but his throat closed more often than not. Yugi never held it against him, but Atem felt guilty all the same.

The Ice Dragon nodded slightly, considering him a moment longer. Then he took a seat and murmured, "Was Yugi born near your nest?"

He blinked and bristled faintly. "What does this pertain to?"

"He appeared so suddenly in my visions and he was already around one by that point. He was not newborn and it was noticeable. I assumed because he was invisible to me for the first year of his life, he must have been near you at birth."

Atem narrowed his eyes. "Yes. He was born near my nest. But I did not know he existed until recently, when he came to challenge me." He paused and tilted his head. "Did you see him after that time?"

Yusei fell silent for a moment. "He disappeared again when he was around ten. I thought you'd crossed paths again."

Atem blinked and shook his head slowly. "I did not know if we did." He hesitated. Had Yugi been near him the entire time? "How long before you saw him again?"

"Another ten years. But I was not actively seeking him out then. I was monitoring more diligently by then, at Jaden's request." Yusei fell quiet. "I almost assumed he was a God Dragon, for how often he disappeared and reappeared in my visions. Everything about his temperament was opposite his species and it almost made sense he'd be divine with such oddities."

"It would make more sense if he was."

Yusei tilted his head. "You match the definition of divinity better, I think."

"If you say so." Atem glanced past Yusei toward where Ironheart was still speaking to the Leviathan. The two looked complete opposite of each other in every manner, from his father's long narrow muzzle to Leviathan's wider. Their coloration was stark contrast, their builds even more so. The Judgment Dragon had a wide barrel chest whereas his son's was narrow and almost delicate in design. Ironheart's legs were much taller and thicker, like a land dragon's rather than a Water Dragon, and even their teeth seemed different. Leviathan's were thin and needle like, his father's longer and thicker, with an obvious backward curve like claws. He stared until his eyes hurt, then turned back. Yusei had crept closer, studying him with a tilted head and wide eyes. He snarled and backed up a pace, startled.

"Sorry. I just… The gem on your forehead changes when your mood does. I've never seen that before." Yusei sat back on his haunches and offered him an awkward smile. "I suppose Yugi noticed that straight away, huh? He's very obsessive with you."

"And you are obsessive with him," he growled, bristling. "Why is that?"

Yusei chuckled and shook his head. "He fascinated me whenever I watched him. He was always so sweet and gentle and his eyes are so unique. He's a strange little creature."

Atem huffed, more than slightly flustered by his explanation. He knew that. Yugi was an oddity all around, from behavior to eye color. But the way Yusei watched him now made him unsure.

The Stardust Dragon smiled faintly. "I just… It's amazing."

"What is?" he snapped, unable to stop himself. He felt dizzy for a single second. "What is so amazing?"

Yusei smiled wider. "How much he chose to emulate you."

Atem bristled and shook his head, too stunned to answer. What was there to say? Yugi always boasted Atem had been something of his north star when he was younger. He always said seeing Atem had helped him shape who he'd become.

He couldn't argue, seeing as he already knew that much.

But to hear it said by someone else made his entire body ache.

"Otherwise," Yusei said quietly, eyes flickering across his as they lit with laughter, "you would have let Jaden kill your siblings."

Atem stared, entire body tensed. "I…"

He smiled and shook his head. "It doesn't matter. I just think it's cute Yugi has always held you as his role model." He glanced over his shoulder toward Jaden and huffed. "It would have been nice if someone had guided him that way. I understand it wouldn't have lasted forever, but if he was still half as kind as you or Yugi, both edicts could have been avoided."

The Sky Dragon opened and closed his mouth, then glanced toward the other male as well. Jaden was speaking to a Water Dragon female who looked particularly thrilled with his attention, but he seemed far more interested in snooping rather than returning her growing affection. Atem shivered, somewhere between curious and disgusted. Did Jesse know Jaden was so willing to use others like this? For the sake of information, he was willing to tease and raise her hopes.

Yusei looked over again. "Don't judge him too harshly. He won't do anything with her. He just wants the information she has."

Atem shook his head. "I know that. I just… I don't know how he can entertain her notions like that."

"You're a Sky Dragon. Disloyalty is unfathomable to your species." He turned away and shook himself out. "I don't believe in falsities for information, but I do understand the notion."

"So you would not use such a method?"

"Unless it was a dire situation, no." Yusei blinked and turned to him more pointedly. "What did Ironheart have to say? Was it as bad as you imagined?"

"I did not imagine anything of meeting him."

The Stardust Dragon opened his mouth as if to answer, then smiled and shook his head. "Okay," he said with another shake of his head. "If you do not want to share, then don't."

Atem turned away and glanced at their reflections in the water once more. He tilted his head and considered their expressions there. His own seemed sour, and Yusei's curious rather than upset. He shifted his weight and flexed his claws, then looked away to see the other male in his peripheral. He blinked and studied him, considering his loose muscles and lazy stance.

"It has nothing to do with you personally. I am merely tired and I do not wish to share my troubles." He shifted his weight once more, then rose to his paws as he heard the Leviathan disengage from conversation with his father. Jaden was approaching when Atem looked over his shoulder to see.

"Atem has never been to my territory before," Yusei announced, grinning. He looked pleasantly surprised and excited as he faced his former mate. Jaden paused, somewhat startled, and gave Atem a curious look.

"You've never ventured north?"

"I have gone as far as the Wind Clan territory and the outskirts of this area, though never from the main land." He glanced at the Leviathan. The Divine Serpent was watching him with an expression he couldn't quite read. He didn't think he looked suspicious, but Atem wasn't sure what else he should have come to expect. He tilted his head and the Water Dragon eyed him for a single second before looking to Jaden as well. "There was never reason for me to travel further."

"I suppose that makes sense. You're a Sky Dragon. Your species tends to have the ability to travel wherever you'd like and live as you wish. You can live in any climate but the desert. Why drift north?"

Atem studied his face. He didn't seem upset any longer. He looked at ease now, comfortable. He wondered if the conversation with the female had somehow done well for his mood. He tilted his head and stared at him in bewilderment. "I was never interested upon returning to my home range. There was no need to travel so far. Everyone knew where to find me."

The Fire Dragon nodded slightly. Yusei watched Atem closely for a single moment before turning away. "Then are you ready to see it?"