Chapter 4

Thorin excuses himself mere minutes after I wake. And by 'excuses' I mean escapes with the quickness of a bat out of hell. His lack of reasoning for his abrupt departure tells me exactly where the dwarf is going. The fact sends painful jolts of anger through my chest but I comfort myself in knowing that he doesn't want to go anymore than I want him to leave. It doesn't change anything but it's a nice thought. I keep silent as prior to leaving, he explains that a few servants will be arriving to take the kids and I to our new rooms. Sitting in bed now, drained but not incapable of getting up, I grind my teeth in annoyance. 'Would it be terribly rude of me to just pop up in the middle of his meeting and give everyone a piece of my mind?' Yes. Yes and it would cause Thorin more trouble than he needs. 'Yeah maybe it would, but do I really care?' Yes. Yes I do. Darn my good sense and manners; Bilbo would be proud.

To take my mind off of Thorin and his woes... and hoes... I mentally address the atmosphere I woke into. It was clear from the unnatural quiet in the room when my peepers snapped open that something strange happened. Still, what could three children do to Thorin to cause such a resigned expression? The trio of likely troublemakers sit on the foot of the bed yacking it up while pulling on poor Duke's ears, totally oblivious to my questions. It will do me no good to interrogate children, however, which means my husband dearest and I have even more to discuss. Great.

"Can't we even go a day without having things to 'discuss'?" I mutter under my breath. A knock on the door draws me out of my mind "Who is-"

Before I can even get the question out of my mouth, the door bursts open and three maids rush in as if Smaug were at their heels. Two are fairly young adults, most likely fresh out of their teen stage but the third is a grizzly grandbear that would have Beorn shuddering. They file into the bedroom without so much as a 'by your leave' and stare me down as if I'm the rude one. Duke growls lowly, Thoria and Theodore crawl to the top of the bed to sit at my sides, while Kiliel looks on in dazed amazement. I swear this kid is Cinderella; all these surprise visits stump him.

The maids are each dressed in what appears to be a uniform of sorts. It isn't as strict as the ones back home though; each wearing the same colored navy blue dresses with white aprons however you can tell they were sewn differently. 'They were probably given the material and tasked with making the dresses themselves.' That aside, even if it weren't for the feminine clothing, I'd still know they were female. Though they are thicker than would ever be considered average or even possible for a human, they have hips up the wazoo that could never be mistaken for male. So its dwarven fertility rather than child birthing that has the race on a downward spiral. 'But which sex is the less fertile one? Life's questions.' I can see how the beards might throw people off but in all honesty, it's more like peach fuzz or… coconut hair for the older one. Not nearly as thick or prominent as even Thorin's was during the quest. Imagine that; the world exaggerating to the point of full-blown lying. Shaking my literal head I watch as the ladies study me as much as I study them and when a decision has been made, the apparent leader steps forward.

"My name is Dulola. This is Menna and she is Gidila." I open my mouth to introduce myself but the dwarfdam isn't finished "However you need not speak our names or to us at all for that matter."

"… Excuse me?" I'm stumped. She sighs airily and speaks slower as if I'm incapable of understanding her because I'm an idiot. I DO NOT like to be talked down to "Listen, lady-"

"When we require you to do something, we will tell you and you will do it without question. In addition, you are not to address us unless we address you first." I run my tongue along my teeth to keep silent. I've nothing child friendly to say to this person. This genuinely sucks. If I were a lesser woman, I'd be all huffy at the treatment. Good thing following instructions was never my strong suit. So, I let the old bag talk "I have been tasked by King Thorin to escort you and the dwarflings in your care to your quarters, though they should be with their mother."

"They ARE with their mother," I answer swiftly, not allowing that one to slide. Placing a hand on each other their heads, I roll my eyes at her "being that their mother is me."

"They may be in your care but do not be foolish, girl. They are clearly dwarflings and you" She looks me up and down while pressing her lips into a thin line, much like an angry caterpillar. I wouldn't be surprised if her mouth jumped off her face with how downturn she is forcing her lips "are definitely not."

"They are dwarves. I am a daughter of man. True. However it doesn't change the fact that I brought them into this world, twice, and I've got the battle scares to prove it. I'll fight for my children and I will always win."

"W'well-"

"So you're the one who is serving me? I get it." She gives me an annoyed look, probably because I cut her off but I'm unbothered. Trying to be the bigger person, I go on "I've only one bag so it shouldn't be more than one trip."

"Do not be difficult, woman." She lifts her nose with a sniff of superiority and it reminds me of Addasser. That guy is great. I hope he hasn't died/faded/become a bigger jerk since I was last here "There are guards lining the halls in case any ruffians get out of hand."

"Well isn't that convenient? Who would have thought that guards would be around a kingdom to... well... guard it?" My mouth drops open as I ignore the barb she threw my way and look at the three children with a mock expression of surprise. Their giggling has Grandbear all but seething. I'm beginning to enjoy getting on this lady's nerves and from the tick in her jaw, I'm working up to her last one "One would almost think it was their job."

"Do not get haughty with me girl!" I merely shrug at her hissing tone. She then glares between Kiliel and myself with a look of distaste "I know it is your profession but I must ask that you not lay with children while inside this mountain."

Her companions offer murmurs of confusion, each wondering if I'm a philandering child molester. It's clear that they are young and inexperienced in the world; they take their opinions from what their superiors tell them without thinking on their own. Even so, I guess it does look bad with me popping up out of nowhere and… breaking Thorin's bed and all that jazz. 'Do they know about that? No... No, I doubt he'd tell them but the noise from his room paired with my sudden arrival is clearly suspicious.' I've never been accused of being a pedophile though. This is not my day.

It's being made worse by Thorin clearly not telling anyone who I am; unintentionally leaving me to look like a lady of the night. It doesn't matter though; I'm willing to show anyone who is confused just who I really am. Thoria whines so low in her throat, it almost sounds like a growl. I know that despite the fact that some of the insults go over their heads, the children still know I'm being disrespected and they aren't too happy about it. Offering my biggest smile I ignore the rude dwarfdam for the moment, instead speaking to Kiliel.

"Lil." I call and it takes him a moment to realize I'm speaking to him. His mouth drops open into a little 'o' at having acquired a nickname. Cuuuute "Take the twins into the other room for me, please. I need to have a little talk with Dulola. Gudila. Menna. You two go with them as well."

"You-"

"King Thorin sent you to serve me. You'll do as I say or you'll find another mountain."

They take my words for true and the two follow after the children. Its the cautious thing to do. Even if I turn out to be a whore, Thorin clearly favors me which put them in a bad situation if I become unhappy with their service. When they are gone, I turn my attention to my accuser. She seems to have lost some of her ferocity but still refuses to back down; instead watching me with blistering confusion. I could care less what she thinks of me, as long as it doesn't upset my children. Everyone is entitled to their own thoughts but keep them away from the impressionable ears of what I claim as mine. My smile drops from my face, revealing a deadly serious expression instead. Leaning onto the pillows in a lazy fashion, I speak.

"For your information, I'm not employed in the sex trade."

"As if-"

"And if you call me a whore again, especially in front of my children," I incline my head with a predatory smirk as I get up to stand in front of her "I will rip your tongue out of your head so quickly it'll still be wagging lies."

"H-h-how dare you threaten me?!" the leader shrieks in offense, choosing to take a precautionary step back. I doubt I could actually yank her tongue out, but I find that at the moment it wouldn't hurt to try "Do you know who I am?!"

"Yeeeeees." drawing out my answer, I look at her through bored eyes "You were kind enough to tell me your names before the insults started flying, Dulola."

"I... What I-"

"Don't worry, I won't forget." I smile as she puffs up her chest. Placing my hand on my own, I smile a bit sweeter "I, am Thia Malcolmson. I can't really say that I'm pleased to meet you."

"… Lies." She whispers angrily "You lie! Queen Thia has long since passed into the afterlife."

"Nope. Still right here."

"Silence!" she bellows like a furnace "You may share her face but you are not the late Queen!"

"You guys have a picture of me? Thats so nice!" must have been Ori. He's such a jack of all trades "And you still have a hard time believing I'm me?"

"Merely a coincidence. You are just an… an imposter! A seductress!" Dulola nods to herself, quickly warming to the idea that I'm some look-a-like to a long dead but awesomely awesome monarch "A deceiver sullying the good Queen's name as you spread her legs for our King for a few coins!"

"I already told you that I'm not a whore." Dragging my hand across my face, I sigh. How can I sully my own name by using it to introduce myself? At least I'm a good Queen. That's something, right? I'm not sure how the royals deal with their servants here. I'm sure I could beat holy hell out of her for the insults but that's not who I am. I'd rather just talk it out but... Some people just can't be reasoned with. No matter what I say, this lady is going to call me a liar. I leave it for now "I'm really not feeling up to your screeching today, lady, and I don't have to prove myself to you. I know who I am. I am Thia, you're Dulola and that's that. Now do what your king ordered you to or are you insubordinate as well as delusional?"

Dulola turns an ugly shade of purple as she does her best impression of a dying fish. It takes a few moments but she finally settles on wisely not saying anything at all. Her teeth click as her mouth shuts, forming a twitching but thin line. I merely lift an eyebrow as she storms out of the room, barely pausing to order Menna and Gidila to 'deal with' me. The outer door slams loudly, signifying Dulola's departure and I shrug. Walking out of the bedroom and glancing at the two girl's left I offer a small smile to show them I'm not going to eat their faces off. Today. I don't know what kind of day I'll be having tomorrow.

"Well?" I say with a lift of my eye mustaches "Lead the way."

With their leader gone, the girls are much less antagonistic. In fact, they seem like lost little sheep without a shepherd. It is unclear as to how long they have been employed by the castle. I direct them when needed and before long we are heading out the door however, I pause when I count only two kids. Turning around slowly as not to hurt myself, I locate Kiliel standing in the middle of the room looking so very lonely.

"What are you doing over there?" I question and he appears surprised that I am still talking to him "We're leaving. Aren't you coming?"

"But… it's only for you and your family…"

"Aren't you family?"

"I… well I mean…" he stumbles over his words while wringing his hands "Y-yes?"

"Well then let's go!"

He openly laughs and we finally depart from the cold room. Guards watch us continuously; some wearily and others in amusement but all are curious. Our new chambers aren't far from where we started and I know for a fact from the insignia on the door that they are in the royal wing. There are numerous apartments and ours is closest to the towering staircase at the end of the hall. The suite consists of three bedrooms with large beds, 8 dressers, 4 nightstands, a fully stocked mini kitchen, half bathroom, and a family room of sorts. It looks like a hotel room, middle earth edition. Even the two maids seem a little star-struck by the quarters. Duke opts to rest a while longer and I'm tempted to join him but am too anxious to lie down. A new place that is actually old leaves much to do.

After setting our things in the rooms, I decide now would be a great time to explore. 'I helped get the place back from a fire-breathing drake. I should get to see it, right?' As much as I would love to lie down and sleep, the kids are just as restless as myself and I'd hate to just pawn them off on Kiliel. So we all go for a walk that Menna and Gidila insist on turning into a tour. They point out all the famous sights and sounds, doing a great job overall. It's so lively and the girls seem eager to please. Without Dulola, they aren't half bad; sweet even.

The three children walk behind the maids but ahead of myself and I'm content to look at how much Erebor has changed since I was last here. Walls that were once non-existent now require me to crane my head to see the top. Beautifully crafted sculptures line the walkways that were too unsteady to even support the weight of a feather. There is life here. So much life. It's all so great... almost all. The stares of the passing masses are hard to ignore but I manage. It's hard when I am the tallest, though not by much, person around. It makes me easier to spot. I'm sure word has already gotten out about my Kingly escapades if the whispering, pointing, and… silent requests for paid services are anything to go by. 'Dwarves are pervs.' A sudden shape flashing in the corner of my eye has me flicking my head to the side to follow it. There, not ten feet away, is Nori pickpocketing some noble looking… noble. Only one thing has changed about the dwarf and that is the number of spikes in his hair puff.

I watch as he successfully snatches a pouch from his victim and stands back as if nothing had happened. He places the pouch on a ledge beside him as he pulls open his satchel and I quickly act. Swinging out of sight behind a pillar, I 'jump' to the spot beside him, snatch up his prize and return to my place as if Id only paused out of sight for a moment. No one from my group even notices that anything happened. No one shouts 'Witch!' so I'm safe for the moment. I keep my eyes on the thief. Reaching up to place the pouch in his bag, Nori comically pats the spot a few times before looking up to find it gone. Spinning in a confused circle, his eyes snap up and dart around the area in suspicion before they fall on me. I've never seen the dwarf look so surprised. He stumbles back as if he's seen a ghost, which is understandable given the situation, but quickly recovers as I wave to him; pouch in hand. He shakes his head in disbelief and offers me a leering grin before disappearing into the shadows.

"Do you know many thieves?" the nagging voice of Dulola comes into my ear as I continue my walk. She's following us. Why she's following us, I don't know but I do know that if she'd seen me jump, she'd have said so "I've never seen the spy master quirk a lip let alone grin. You two must be very close."

"So he's a spymaster now? Good for him, I suppose. We were in Thorin's company together." I pay little mind to the emphasis she puts on 'very,' matching her sneer with a grin "But I'm sure you should know that already."

"Still slandering Lady Thia's name I see."

"Just telling you like it is."

"Humph." She twists her nose up and goes off to do whatever with a call back "You won't have the King's favor for long. They never do."

Dulola is going to be a problem, I just know it. Even so, there is little I can do about it for now, aside from keeping my eyes peeled. But... who are the 'they' that never last long? 'If he's been... b-b-boinking random women, I swear I'm gonna-' I take a deep breath and try not to get worked up. I don't know what's been going on for the last few decades but seething in the pavilion will not help me. Painfully catching up to my group, I nearly suck my teeth at the yawn that tries to break free from my mouth. From the way I feel, I know it's past 10pm back home. The idea is wholeheartedly supported by the slow energy sap I see happening to my chickadees. A few calculations tell me it's also 10 here but in the AM. If I can get them to last 2 more hours, I can give them a nap and it'll help start to transfer their sleep cycle over. 'Look at me being all mom-ish.' What can we do for the next two hours though? My stomach growls and I know just the answer.

"Excuse me, but I think it's time to get something to eat." My voice stops the two maids and they turn to look at me curiously "We all missed breakfast and I'm sure you two could use a break."

"Yes'um." They answer simultaneously and quickly guide us to a dining hall where we can eat free of charge. Good because I have no money "Do you require assistance returning to your quarters?"

"No. We'll be fine." I've got Kiliel if I really get lost, which could be a very likely case since my sense of direction is worse than Thorin's "Thanks, you two take care now."

Finding a relatively empty table, I settle the twins down and ask Kiliel to watch them while I go make use of my primitive hunting and gathering skills. I prowl the tables for food I think I can get the children to try, thankful for the simple choices. I pack three plates with sausage, bacon, biscuits, and eggs, promising to return for the pancakes to put on my own plate. I will always love pancakes. When I return, Kiliel makes a move to get up.

"You don't like the food?" I wasn't sure what he wanted so I tried to be diverse in my selection "I could remake the plate if you want."

"It is for... me?" his surprised face is just adorable "I thought…"

"Nope, this is for you." I place the food before the children. We bless it real quick and I stand back up with a silent groan to go make my own plate "Eat it while it's still warm, I'll go get my own."

"Ah, n-n-n-no let-"

I'm gone before he finishes, brokering for no discussion. I can't feed two and not the third. In less than a day, I've somehow adopted a kid. Look at me go. No one has complained about it, so I take it in stride. Selecting a decently clean dish once more, I stack my plate with all the glorious pancakes I think I can handle. Regardless of how many years pass, I will always love pancakes. ALWAYS. Humming a tuneless tune, I almost miss a strange dwarf appearing just beyond my right shoulder. I look at him from the side of my eyes, but when he says nothing, I ignore him. Even with all the not-so-child-friendly and downright lewd offers I've gotten this morning, none of the dwarves came within ten feet of me. I assume because they aren't aware of just how much Thorin favors me and don't want to tread on his toes. Life as a mistaken prostitute is hard. Even so, it was more of… silent catcalling and deliberate coin purse jingling than anything. Nothing I haven't seen before.

As I step away, the mystery dwarf's hand shoots out and grabs my wrist in a firm grip. He bends low and places a lingering kiss on the captured appendage; all the while keeping his eyes on my own. Usually I would look away but I find myself unable to do so. Though not unpleasant, it is odd to say the least. Extremely out of place. Some sort of familiar recognition in the unfamiliar. Giving him my full attention, I wait for him to say something but he just keeps staring up at me as if committing my face to memory.

"Look buddy, I'm going to need you to let go of my hand. It hasn't done anything to you."

Surprisingly enough, he does as I ask. Standing to his full height, I note that he reaches just above the tip of my nose. His face is hard but evenly proportioned and his body is thick with the well-known dwarven strength that could snap my neck like a twig. However, it's the overwhelming sense of attraction and caution that keeps me from returning to my table and leading him to my children. It's not sexual attraction or dangerous caution but rather.. a simultaneous push and pull. Like an acquaintance I know personally to be untrustworthy. Like Nori. Strange indeed.

"Now, what do you want?"

"For the eyes, ye are like a banquet to a starvin' dwarf. Yer demeanor is cool as an autumn night but yer eyes! Yer eyes blaze hot as a forge's fire and I have yet to even earn yer ire. I can see why the king fell for ye." His voice is like warm satin. It's smooth and refined, gliding across my skin like liquefied passion. At the same time, it can be described as melted butter. It feels nice at first, but then you just want the oily substance off your skin. I feel like it's practiced and he's trying to sell me something really bad that I really don't need "Ye are truly a beauty in the purest form of the word."

"Uh, thanks?" I look him up and down. Nope, no name tag "Who are you?"

"A… friend. An old friend."

"We've met?"

"We've crossed paths."

"That doesn't make us friends."

"Would ye prefer to be enemies?"

"That-"

"With our King gettin' remarried, that would make ye unbound and free, correct?" I glare at his constant topic leaping but he simply grins. Tapping my foot on the floor, I wait for his point though I have a pretty good idea from the lascivious way his eyes don't seem to stay on my face. This too, less however, still seems practiced "I'd sure like to try ye on for size."

"Sorry, I'm tailor-made and won't fit you." I say with a shrug of my shoulders "So, thanks but no thanks. I'm not interested."

"Maybe so, I am interested in ye, however. I'm sure we can make it fit." I back away immediately and he raises his hands in a peaceful gesture that I'm not falling for "I remember the weddin' between ye two, and it twas ye. Twasn't it." There is no question in his voice. Great, the one person to believe me is a pervert "It was always known to us that ye were alive but that hardly matters now. Ye look ravishin' if I do say so myself."

"Us?" I ask curiously

"I'd love to whisper all the things ye'd like to know." he responds swiftly "For a price of course."

"Soooo... you were at the wedding?" I ignore his offer, trying to find a safer topic since he doesn't seem to want to explain himself or beat it "One of Dain's soldiers?"

"Somethin' like that, wee sweet one." He darn near purrs the endearment, leaning into my personal space. I can't tell if his goal is to entice me or weird me out "How about ye and I find a nice quiet place where I can fill ye up with MY soldiers, hm?"

"Uuuuuuuuum…."

He begins wagging his eyebrows suggestively and I can't do anything but stand here and watch the bushy worms dance. It's all made worse by the fact that I know he's using this flirtatious façade as a cover for something more sinister. He wants something from me, knows things about me, and if I had to bet, this is probably not about a roll between the sheets. At least, not fully. He'd definitely be open to it but that's not the ultimate goal. I just got here, how much trouble can I get into just by eating breakfast?! When he begins flicking his tongue between his lips, however, I've had enough. Squaring my shoulders, I purposefully don't back away from him so that I must look down to see his eyes.

"Please leave me alone."

"I would love to leave and be alone with ye." He tries again; silky yet bold words stroking my skin and turning my stomach

"That isn't what I said." I counter firmly "Leave."

"I'll leave-"

"Now. You will leave now."

The dwarf stills at the sound of Nori's voice behind him. The spymaster has a firm grip on waggy's arm and I can hear the leather of his gloves creaking under the pressure. His wagging eyebrows have long since ceased and his face drops all sensual suggestion, instead adopting cold calculation. Silence stands between the three of us before the dwarf lets out a huff of annoyance. It takes but a moment for the Casanova wannabe to turn into James Bond and twist out of Nori's grasp.

"If it isn't the king's rat, just in time to disturb us, aye sweetheart?" The two glare at each other in obvious hate before the stranger peers around Nori to look at me "Let's continue this some other time darlin'. I'll be seeing ye 'round, even if ye don't see me. Until then, my Queen Thia."

Wonderful, he knows my name and has called me with possession. I don't want this weirdo watching my moves and aim to tell him I'm not 'his' anything just before he winks forest green eyes at me while blowing a kiss. I growl low in my throat but it doesn't seem to affect him. Nori doesn't bother chastising the dwarf as he immediately disappears into the crowd after a quick bow. I blink after him wondering not only what just happened but who the guy is overall. He seemed quite familiar with me and the second Ri. Without turning, I greet my long time Frenemy.

"Hey, Nori. Long time, no see." Picking my plate up once more, I test the temperature of the pancakes with my free hand and sigh regretfully. Cold. I'll need new ones "What was that all about?"

"You saw me not an hour ago, lass." He responds, following me down the line. I hum lightly, picking up new bits of food "That is hardly a long time."

"Uh huh." I agree, not missing how he only answered me in part "And..."

"And?"

"What was that about?"

"What was what about?"

"Nori, don't play dumb. That guy and his weird voice."

"That was no one but a dishonorable dwarf attempting to con you into bed." he answers simply "As to his voice, I've no idea what you mean."

"Sure you don't."

"He is no one of great importance." his arms cross over his chest in contemplation "Still, keep your distance from him and if he shows up again, inform Thorin or myself."

"Is he dangerous?" I'm beginning to worry and Nori apparently catches on to that "Tell me if he is."

"There are many like him." he states cryptically "He was simply searching for a bed warmer.

"I would agree if he didn't ninja his way out of your hands during his escape." His lips thin out as he glances into the crowd once more "Who was he?"

"Put it from your mind." He insists

"Oh yeah sure, that'll be easy." I lightly tap my forehead and scrunch up my eyes as if concentrating "Nope, still there."

"You stole from me." He suddenly changes the subject with a halfhearted snarl "I do not take kindly to being robbed."

"Ah yes. I thought that was you robbing that guy blind." I pour the syrup until my new pancakes nearly drown in it. I won't be forgetting the incident but I know Nori will tell me nothing he doesn't want me to know. He'll tell Thorin though and Thorin 100% wont tell me "You're getting rusty or old or both."

"You, on the other hand, do not look a day older than you did in your screaming departure 60 years ago." He flicks the beads that I was sure never to remove. Pushed behind my ear like this, they are well hidden in my curls and can't be seen unless someone is looking for them "Shouldn't you be dead by now?"

"I've heard that so many times today that I'm beginning to think you people want me dead." I scoff as I reach the end of the line, finally giving the thief my full attention. In this corner of the room, most people can't really see us, making it a great place to talk privately "Thorin was even…"

"Planning to remarry." He finishes my thought without remorse, picking up a knife and fork for me "I haven't heard any talk of halting the plans either."

"Just hit me where it hurts, why don't you." I sarcastically remark, snatching the utensils "It was just this morning."

Pain blossoms in my lower back as the dwarf firmly pats the area. Either Nori doesn't understand sarcasm or he's a jerk. 'Jerk.' I refuse to give him the satisfaction of seeing me collapse into a twitching pile of pain... but I'm really close. Just to be sure I hand him my food so that I won't drop it and he takes it without question. He grins as he reaches over and plucks a sausage link from my plate, munching away.

"So you and Thorin finally banged in a few nails, aye? It's about time, I was sure he'd had you during the quest." the sound of jingling pulls another groan from me. He took the purse back. Seeing me eyeballing the bag, he ruffles my hair as if I were a child "Despite all the time that's passed, you're still decades too young to steal from me, girlie."

His grinning face suddenly turns into a grimace. We look down as one, taking notice of the small child between us. Theodore must have come to retrieve me when I took too long. My little protector is going to town on Nori's leg and it's the most heartwarming thing I've ever seen. Even at three years old, the little wildling only comes just above my knee. I'd worried about the children. Their growth, height, weight. All of it was so off. The nurses were thiiiiis close to sending CPS my way before I mentioned dwarfism. The pediatrician agreed that it was likely another form of it and we were safe. I continued to worry though, hoping they were normal for dwarves because they aren't for humans. They are so small but so very strong. Nori, only being a few inches shorter than I but built like a small brick house, is having no trouble dealing with the child. Putting my plate on the counter and picking the youngster up under the arms, he holds the boy at arm's length as to avoid getting his nose pummeled in.

"Oi!" he peers into Theodore's face, studying the child curiously "Didn't your mother ever tell you not to hit folk?"

"I did but there are exceptions." The thief's eyes bounce between mine and a quietly seething Theodore "You have something to say about the way I raise my son?"

"This child is a dwarf, not a half-breed." He states and I know he means no disrespect by the word but it sounds so harsh "You could not have carried a dwarfling, and even if you had you would not have lived to raise him."

"Well I did. Call me lucky or call me unlucky." I shrug my shoulders "Depends on who you ask."

"Impossible."

"Nothing is impossible if you know the right people."

"And you know these 'right' people?"

"Eh, they know me and insist on screwing with my life."

"…Well ain't that somethin'." Setting the boy on the floor, Theodore hugs my legs, turning his back completely on the dwarf as if dismissing him. The thief's eyes widen and he points to the young boy with a shaky finger "That mark on his neck…"

"Mmmm a birthmark." I answer, caressing the spot before snatching my plate up and starting to walk back to the table "His sister has one too."

"Sister?" his questions rings after me "Thorin won't be happy to know you took a lover."

"I didn't. I had twins." I grin at his blank face o cover the reminder that the king might have done just that "Don't hold me to your rules."

"You, Thia Malcolmson, are somethin' akin to unbelievable." He chuckles, falling into step with me

"I've been told as much."

Hey guys! A side note: Theodore and Thoria share Durin's soul.