Another day of Amphibia. Anne and Sprig were exploring the forest, though Anne was not having fun. "Why do we always hang out in the woods? You have a perfectly good living room."

"Where's the fun in that? This place is full of nature. Whoo-hoo!" Sprig cheered as he ran off.

Anne lagged behind as she saw a ladybug getting eaten by a spider. Nature is scary. "Yeah, exactly."

Further down the road, Sprig stopped Anne when he heard something rustling in the bushes. "Stay back. It could be a bloodsucking predator."

"You are really not selling me on this place," said Anne.

Sprig pushed the bush aside to find a doll made from a gourd and some straw. His eyes widened. "Oh, no. It's an-"

"AMBUSH!" An invisible force tackled him to the ground. The next thing he knew, Ivy Sundew was on top of him, pinning his arms down. "Got you again!"

"Oh, come on, Ivy! You used your Stand again! You know I can't see it! How fair is that?"

"Tutto è lecito in amore e in guerra," Ivy said.

"What?"

"Oh, sorry," said Ivy as she helped Sprig up. "I've been taking Italian lessons from JoJo's phone. How was that?" she asked Johan as he came out of hiding.

"Pretty good, though some pronunciations were a little off," he said as he suppressed a giggle. "And that ambush of yours? Could use some work."

"WHAT?!"

"It's not really an ambush if you scream it out."

"Aw..." Ivy looked at Anne. "Oh. I didn't see you, Anne. Question, do you like being randomly attacked?"

"Not at all."

"Well, too bad. See you later, Sprig. But you won't see me." With that, Invisible Touch made her vanish. She giggled as she snuck off.

"I can still hear you," Johan called out. "Come back here!" he shouted as he followed her footprints.

Sprig smiled only to stop when Anne said, "Well, well, well. She's kinda cute, huh?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," he said as he left.

"Well, well, well, well, well, well, well."

"You're being weird, Anne!"

Meanwhile, Johan and Ivy were laughing as they walked back to the tea shoppe. "And he never learns," Ivy laughed. "I swear, it's like he forgets that I have a Stand!"

"Well, from the sound of it, it gets funnier every time you do it."

"Lo fa! How was that?"

"I think you need another lesson."

"Aw..."

When they entered the shoppe, they were met with the sight of Felicia and Sylvia smiling. "Mom, Grandma? Why do you look unnaturally happy?"

"Good news, Ivy! The Firefly Formal is tonight and Hopediah Plantar invited you to participate in the ritual with Sprig. I even got the dress ready!"

Ivy immediately turned pink in the cheeks. "Mom! Sprig and I are just friends!"

"Peh! My husband and I started out as friends," Sylvia said. "Two years later, we got married and gave birth to that." She pointed to Felicia.

"Mom," she grumbled.

Johan held up his hand. "Hi. I'm a human with no knowledge of amphibian culture. What ritual?"

"Only frogs who have performed the ceremonial dance in the ceremonial garb are allowed to be wed," explained Felicia.

His eyes widened. "Oh, no. Is this a matchmaking thing?!"

Ivy face palmed. "Mom, you cannot be serious! Besides, Sprig's engaged to Maddie! He's got the ring and everything."

"Not unless you're into polygamy," said Johan.

"Poly-what?" asked Sylvia.

"It's the practice of marrying more than one spouse. Although, where I come from, it's illegal in many countries."

"Pfft! Humans and ridiculous customs. We frogs mate for life!"

"Grandma," Ivy insisted. "We're not mating!"

"Not with that attitude, you're not. Now hold still while I put on your dress!"

"Grandma, no! Help me, Mom!" Ivy pleaded as she was dragged away.

Johan watched the scene with uncomfortable vibes. "Uh, Felicia, pardon me for getting in the way with true love, but doesn't this seem kinda forced? This seems less like matchmaking and more like human trafficking."

"It's not. Trust me, I underwent the same ritual when I married Ivy's dad."

"So, it was a shotgun wedding? Ba dum tis."

Later that evening, the Firefly Formal was well under way. Lights hung from the street lamps, people were dancing and eating from the snack tables. But not everyone was having a good time. "I look stupid. Sprig's gonna think I look stupid," Ivy said as she looked at herself in the reflection of a window. She could be mistaken for Queen Elizabeth I, with the frilly outfit, makeup and big wig she was wearing.

"Well, from the looks of it," said Johan as he pointed ahead. "It looks like the feeling's mutual for Sprig."

Indeed, Sprig was wearing what looked like nobleman clothes from the Renaissance era, powder makeup and a feathered hat. He looked just as embarrassed and uncomfortable as Ivy.

"My little girl's a woman," said Felicia as she adjusted Ivy's wig, completely ignorant of her discomfort.

"Mom," the little frog girl said in embarrassment.

Hop Pop slapped his grandson on the back and handed him a bouquet of mushrooms. "All right, boy, go get that lucrative business relationship. I mean, romantic relationship." He chuckled. "Saved it."

Sprig approached Ivy, though it was hard due to his outfit restricting his movements. "Hey," he squeaked.

"Hi," said Ivy.

"Uh... these are for you," he said as he handed her the bouquet.

"Oh. Thanks."

"So...you're looking like a... girl frog."

"Oh, okay. I like your, uh, collar."

Meanwhile, the grownups, Johan, Anne and Polly watched from a short distance. "This is just painful to watch," said Johan.

"Tell me about it," said Polly.

"I'm so happy we agreed on this merger, Hopadiah," said Felicia. "That Sprig of yours looks like a hard worker."

"Like we agreed, you'll get Sprig to work at your restaurant, and I'll get the seeds to those Sundew vegetables," said Hop Pop.

"Agreed."

Johan looked over to Anne as she watched the two young frogs with glee. "Anne, is that a dating magazine?"

"Yep! It gave me all the tips I need for this date. Did you know that newborn couples start out as 'just friends'?"

"Anne, this is wrong and you know it."

"This is so exciting. I wonder what their ship name will be. Ivig? Sprigivy?"

"You're not even listening to me, are you?"

"I don't even know what she's saying," said Polly.

"Shh!" hushed Hop Pop. "Let's watch our little love doves fly. Love doves are birds that mate for life."

The DJ, a yellow newt by the name of Albus Duckweed, spoke into the microphone, "Excuse me, everybody, but I hear we have a couple of love doves here tonight. Ivy Sundew and Sprig Plantar. Whoo! A big hand for them. Come on, let me hear it." The people clapped for the "loving couple" completely oblivious to their discomfort. Duckweed took out some cue cards. "Hopadiah Plantar says, 'Sprig, don't mess this up for us.' And Felicia Sundew would like Ivy to 'have a great courtship. Wink.' It says "wink" here. 'Love, Mom.' And Mr. Flour says, 'You two-timing, oath-breaking backstabbers!' Huh. That doesn't sound good, does it?"

Anne, Hop Pop and Felicia's eyes widened. "Oh, no," they said at once. They heard a small giggle behind them and turned to see Johan hiding his laugh with his left hand. "JoJo, what have you done?!" exclaimed Anne.

"I thought it could use a little drama, so I told Sprig's bride-to-be's father about what you guys were planning."

The father of Maddie Flour marched toward the Plantars and Sundews. "So, this is why my Maddie wasn't invited to the Firefly Formal!"

"Now, now," said Anne. "We had an agreement, Sprig marries your daughter for pizza dough. But since said dough was digested in a tomato plant, we thought the agreement was null and void."

"SO YOU USED US?!" Mr. Flour shouted, making the Plantars and Sundews jump back.

"Uh... Look," said Hop Pop, whose heartbeat was increasing by the second. "Your daughter is nice and cute and all..." He watched Maddie taking voodoo dolls of Sprig and Ivy and sewing them together. "But we decided my grandson could do better."

This did not make Mr. Flour happy at all to say the least. He took out a skillet from his belt and tried to bash Hop Pop's head with it. The old frog ducked and ran for his life with Mr. Flour chasing after him and with Felicia chasing after Mr. Flour.

Anne was in panic mode. "Now look what you've done, JoJo! This magazine says nine out of ten people regret their first dates if anything goes wrong. Nine out of ten!"

Maddie approached Sprig and Ivy and said, "Hi, guys. You two look like clowns. Clowns are creepy." She leaned in a little closer. "I like clowns."

"M-Maddie, it's not what it looks like," Sprig stammered. "I didn't even want to do this! Our parents forced us into this and..."

"It's alright. I know you wouldn't betray our marriage, not like this."

"I- I don't want to date you, either, Sprig," said Ivy. "I only went along because I didn't want to hurt you. Also 'cause my mom and grandma forced me."

The three kids laughed. "Parents, am I right? What do you say we ditch this thing and go watch some fireflies?" said Sprig. "They're in season."

"After you, friend," said Ivy.

"Why, thank you, friend. Uh, Maddie, you wanna come with?"

Maddie nodded. With the help of a spell, she destroyed the costumes, revealing their regular clothes underneath and they took off.

This was too much for Johan. He pulled out his gun and fired into the air, stopping the arguing. "ENOUGH! THIS IS RIDICULOUS! YOU CAN'T JUST FORCE PEOPLE TO FALL IN LOVE!" He quietly added, "Not unless you have a shotgun pointed at their heads."

Felicia, Hop Pop, Mr. Flour and Anne looked at each other before they shouted, "GET THE SHOTGUNS!"

"No, no, no, no, no!" shouted Johan. "Look around you! This is nuts! And I have a very high tolerance for nuts! Why don't you just get Sprig and the girls naked and have a threesome?! In fact, Anne, let's both get naked and start mating! No, better yet, let's all get naked and start mating!"

"You come near me, I'll hit you with this tennis racket," she said as she pointed said racket at him. Her eyes widened. "Oh. I see what you mean."

"This isn't about mating," shouted Hop Pop. "This is about the good of the farm AND for Passione! Think about it, JoJo! If our two families merge, your gang will be making twice as much money than it did!"

Johan pinched the bridge of his nose. "If my father were here, he would bring you to the brink of death and then resuscitate you with Gold Experience Requiem for saying that. Don't you care what the kids have to say about all this?" It was in that moment he realized someone was missing. "Hey, where are the kids?"

Felicia, Mr. Flour and Felicia stopped their arguing and looked around.

"Sprig?"

"Ivy?"

"Maddie!"

The parents didn't know it, but the kids were at a spring, somewhere in the forest. They sat on a log, watching the fireflies hover around their heads. "Wow. Man, this is way better than that stuffy old dance. Right, Ivy?" To Sprig's surprise, he could only find Maddie. "Ivy? Ivy?"

Maddie made her usual creepy smile and sang, "She's closer than you think."

"What do you mean?" An invisible force grabbed him by the arms and pinned him to the ground. He let out a high-pitched scream of fright. Ivy giggled as she undid Invisible Touch's effect on herself. "JoJo was right! It is better when you don't shout it out."

"Ooh, frog, I almost had a heart attack!" Sprig panted before saying.

"Wanna help me dig up his grave?" asked Maddie.

"Certainly," said Ivy.

Sprig muttered, "This got dark all of a sudden." All three kids laughed before they sat on a log and resumed watching the fireflies.

Back with the grownups, Anne, JoJo and Polly, they were in the forest, searching for the missing trio. "Hmm. Where are those dang kids?"

The sound of flapping wings made them look up and they saw two doves flying over the trees and dancing. Everyone was captivated by their beauty, except for Hop Pop, who was terrified. "Love doves," he whispered. "Don't move or we're dead."

"What? I thought they were all romantic and mate for life," said Anne.

"Yeah, and they spend that life massacring all living things!"

The love doves looked at the frogs and humans and shrieked at them before diving toward them. Johan summoned DARE and punched them. "MUDA! MUDA!" The love doves crashed into a tree. They looked each other and nodded. They flew up into the sky and begun to spin around, faster and faster...

Hop Pop's eyes widened. "Their hypnotic courtship dance! Don't look or you'll..." He didn't get to finish his sentence as pink, blue and purple rings appeared in his eyes, followed by everyone else's. They stared at the birds with dumb grins on their faces, completely helpless as the birds stopped dancing and flew down to grab them.

Back with Maddie, Sprig and Ivy, they continued to watch the fireflies, totally unaware of the danger their families were in. "Hey, purple ones," said Sprig.

"Oh, yeah, those are babies," said Ivy. "I read that they're purple so the moms can find them if they get lost."

"Purple is also a color of death," said Maddie. "So predators know better not to eat them."

"Wow, I did not know that," said Ivy. "What else do you know about fireflies?"

"That they're not flies, they're beetles."

"Huh. Then why don't they call them fire beetles?" asked Sprig.

"I dunno."

Sprig asked Maddie a question, "So, it doesn't bother you that I'm hanging out with Ivy even though we're betrothed...kinda?"

Maddie shook her head. "I'm not the jealous type. I know you would never betray me," she said. "I'd know if you did." Sprig gulped.

Ivy scratched the back of her head. "Then you don't mind us being friends, Maddie?"

"We both have a passion for the macabre. I think we're going to get along fine, girlfriend."

Ivy smiled. "Thanks, Maddie."

The kids resumed watching the fireflies...until they saw the love doves fly by with their families in their talons. "Our families!" exclaimed Sprig. "We gotta help them!"

"Way ahead of you," said Maddie as she readied some potions while Ivy grabbed a stick.

"Come on!"

The love doves threw their prey into their nest, knocking them out of the trance. But before they could escape, the love doves glued them to the nest with sticky saliva. Then they squawked and flew away, much to Anne's confusion. "Uh, so they're not gonna eat us?"

"Not right away," said Hop Pop. "Love doves prefer to let their prey marinate in fear first."

"Can it, Plantar," snapped Felicia. "This is all your fault. If you taught your grandson proper courtship technique-"

"My fault? It's obviously yours."

"No it's yours," snapped Mr. Flour. "If you had kept your word and let my daughter date your grandson-"

Anne pulled out her magazine with her teeth and said, "Guys, it says here that our relationships define us, and nothing else. Nothing else!"

They fought and argued until Polly decided they needed to hear the truth. "ENOUGH! JoJo is right!"

"Exactly! Uh...what was I right about again?"

"The only reason we're here marinating is because you all had to play matchmaker. You two..." She pointed to Hop Pop and Felicia. "...were greedy, plain and simple. And you..." She pointed to Mr. Flour. "...arranged your daughter to get married to Sprig in exchange for giving us dough! How is that real love?!"

The grownups looked at each other. "Maybe you're right," said Hop Pop, feeling ashamed.

"It's nuanced," said Felicia.

"I didn't take my daughter's feelings into account," said Mr. Flour.

"Nice. Totally innocent for once," said Anne. "You three should be ashamed."

Polly gave her the stink eye. "Are you KIDDING?! Sprig only went through with this because of you and this dumb magazine!" She grabbed the magazine with her teeth, tore it to shreds and spat the remains out the nest.

Anne blinked a few times before saying, "Wow. I feel lighter somehow, more... free."

"Good. Everyone agrees they fucked up," said Johan. "But, that still doesn't change the fact that WE'RE ABOUT TO BE EATEN ALIVE! Felicia, can't you use The Rose to free us?"

Felicia nodded. She summoned The Rose, which sprouted a thorny vine that cut them free from the sticky spit. Quickly, they jumped out of the nest, and were surprised to see Sprig, Ivy and Maddie.

"Aw, you freed yourselves before we could free you," whined Sprig.

"We're also here to tell you we don't want to date each other and we never will," snapped Ivy.

"And I want to marry whoever I want," said Maddie.

The grownups were about to apologize, only to stop when a shriek made them turn around. The love doves had returned. "I always tell them, 'Save the heartfelt apologies for when we get to safety.'" snarked Polly.

"Don't worry, guys. Sprig, Maddie and I are ready for combat. Right?" Ivy was met with silence. "Sprig?" He was gone.

Maddie suddenly realized her pockets felt lighter. "Hey, my exploding potions are gone!"

All of a sudden, bottles rained down from a tree and landed on the birds. When the smoke cleared, all that remained were roasted doves. Sprig hopped down from the tree, pleased with his work. The grownups and Anne started tearing up. Johan raised an eyebrow at them. "Are you crying?"

"Even in death, they are beautiful," wept Hop Pop.

Johan nodded. "Hey, anyone hungry? I feel like having roasted dove." Everyone glared at him. "Too soon? Eh, too bad!" He grabbed a leg and began chewing it.

"Have you no respect for the dead?!" shouted Hop Pop.

"They're predators that tried to eat us. I say they deserved it."

"Come along now, Ivy," said Felicia as she grabbed her daughter's hand. "Let's get you home so I can apologize safely."

"Let's get you home too, Maddie," said Mr. Flour as he led his daughter away. "And far away from this death trap forest."

"See ya, Sprig!" both girls called out.

"See ya, Maddie! See ya, Ivy!"

"Sprig, next time we won't get the courtship kit out until you're good and ready," said Hop Pop assuringly. "Now I can focus on finding love for Polly."

"NO!" screamed the pollywog.

"Well, that's the end of that," said Anne. "Now you and Ivy can go back to being just friends, and you're back to being Maddie's fiancé."

"Yep," said Sprig, looking at the direction Ivy and Felicia were walking down. Ivy looked back at him and waved to him and he waved back.

"Oh, you just fell in love with her, didn't you?" asked Anne.

"Yeah, I just fell in love with her."

"So, how are you going to explain this to Maddie," asked Johan as he chewed on a piece of roast love dove.

Sprig's eyes bugged out. "Oh, frog..."

To Be Continued...