Hi Readers: I hope you enjoyed yesterday's chapter that I wrote for you. But now, I am going to continue with this story for one more chapter, because I owe that to you guys. I at least owe you guys one chapter a day, in my opinion, ahead of updating the other one. So, I hope that you guys like this chapter; after all, we do have a lot to find out about. But not today. I am not going to be giving you the Halstead chapter that you want, because I decided to leave you hanging on that (sorry, not sorry). But still, hope you like this one.

Chapter Two Hundred and Seventy
I Think I Should Go Alone Tomorrow

Severide Home – Sitting in bed alone, while your (hunky) husband takes a shower, and your sons take a nap ready does give you time to think. Time to think about the mistakes that you made in the past, especially those that you just made very recently. And right now, that was exactly what Stella Kidd-Severide was in the midst of doing; she was thinking about some of the mistakes that she made lately, and just what the repercussions have been so far. And now just the repercussions for her, but for her husband; whose best friend just so happens to be the husband of the woman she betrayed, as well as the brother of the woman she treated like a bitch. So, yeah; to say that Stella has a lot on her mind at the moment would be an understatement, and not even the sight in front of her can get her to stop thinking about it. The sight of her hot husband walking out of the washroom, with nothing but a towel around his body.

After all, Kelly just came back from the gym; and she had one rule. And that was that he was not to get in their bed, unless he wasn't sweaty; and her idiot of a husband decided not to take a shower at the gym, which meant that he had to take one here. And let's just say that Kelly is a bit disappointed at the moment, because he had to take it alone; and he was going to vocalize that fact, as he walked over to his dresser so that he could get ready to join his beautiful wife in bed. "You know, just because you're mad at yourself about what happened with Gabby…that doesn't mean that you need to punish me in the shower." Turning her head as she heard Kelly say that, Stella just laughed before shaking her head. "Seriously? You thought that I did that on purpose?" Kelly smirked as he turned to look at the woman he loves, whilst also putting some deodorant on. "That, and I wanted to see your nice smile at me." Stella agreed.

"You can tell, can't you?" Kelly agreed with his wife as she asked him whether he can tell whether he can tell that she has something on her mind right now; and that was what was going on with Gabby, because he's well aware of the situation. "Stella, do you really think that I'm not in constant contact with Matt?" Stella just looked at her husband as he said that, whilst continuing to watch as he set his deodorant down; after which, he proceeded to grab some of his cologne. "Whose side are you on?" Kelly just looked at his wife as she asked him that, a bit taken aback; I mean, does Stella really believe that he would be on anybody else's side (other than hers)? She's his wife, and the love of his life; and she's also the mother of his sons: Kyle and Stephen. "Stella, that's not fair. We both know that you have no need to ask me that question, when we are married and have two sons." Stella sighed, agreeing with Kelly.

But at the same time, her husband could see that she had something else on her mind; something that was related to what she asked him, but that was not related to him (exactly). "Okay, you have something on your mind right now. And I want to know what's going on, so that I can help you." Stella sighed. "I guess, it's just how I'm going to be received at work; and whether I should even keep working at ELLA right now, when I…" Kelly looked at his wife as she said that, before interrupting her as he didn't want her to finish that sentence. "Okay, I want you to stop right now; and I do not want you to finish that sentence." Stella just looked at Kelly as he told her that, before taking a breath. "Kelly, do you really think that…" Kelly sighed as he heard Stella ask him that, before going to grab some boxers from his dresser. After which, he proceeded to put them on underneath his towel. "Stella, just breathe for me babe."

Stella agreed with her husband as he told her that, doing just that for him; after all, she knew that he wasn't going to let her keep doing down this path. And that's due to the fact that he loves her too much to let her go down this bath. I mean, he is her husband; and he loves her more than anything, including their sons. The sons that he was currently making his way over to, so that he could check on them. "I just finished changing them, and they should sleep for a while." Kelly agreed with his wife as she said that, glad that was the case. "Good, because I think that we need to talk right now." Stella agreed with Kelly, before smirking as she does like the sight of her shirtless husband there with their sons. "I have to say though, I do like the sight of you shirtless there." Kelly laughed as he heard Stella say that, before turning his head and looking at Kyle and Stephen once more today. "You guys, do your dad a favor."

Stella laughed as she heard that, whilst Kelly put his hand on each of the boys' necks; after which, he bent down and kissed both of their foreheads. "Stay asleep, so that me and your beautiful mommy can get a bit of time with each other in bed; time that your daddy wants pretty bad, as your mommy looks so damn sexy right now." Laughing as she heard Kelly say that, Stella shook her head. "Not too sure that I want to teach my sons that word yet Kelly." Kelly agreed with Stella as she said that, well aware that was the case. "Oh, I doubt that you do; but that doesn't mean that I don't want to teach it to them, because I want them to know what it means when their daddy calls their mommy sexy." Stella smiled as she heard Kelly say that, before extending her hand; after all, she does want her man in bed. "I still can't believe that they're already 3 months old, and 2 weeks away from their first Christmas."

Kelly agreed with his beautiful wife as she said that, while also continuing to make his way over to bed; where he was going to join Stella in bed, so that they can relax and talk to each other right now. Anyways, Kelly can clearly see that his wife has a lot on her mind at the moment; and that most certainly does include the guilt that she has, from sending her best friend in labor. And that was actually something that he needed to talk to her about, especially after the last text that he just got from his best friend; about what he wants tomorrow, ahead of his PTSD diagnosis. And unfortunately, his wife may not like the idea; but still, he feels like he needs to respect his friends' wishes. "Listen, do you mind if we talk for a bit? About tomorrow?" Looking up at Kelly as he asked her that, Stella could just see that there was something bothering him. "You nervous about tomorrow? Kelly, you know that I'll be there…" Kelly sighed.

"Okay, that's actually what I need to talk to you about." Stella just looked at her husband, while also trusting him; after all, he was speaking to her in a way that really meant that he needed to speak to her. It was his serious tone, that made her believe that something was wrong. "Then how about you get in bed? And you can join me, so that we can talk about whatever you need to talk to me about." Kelly agreed with Stella as she said that, as that was exactly what he wanted to do; he wanted to get in bed with his wife, so that he could talk to her and let her know what was going on…and what his friend requested of him, if he chose to come see him tomorrow. And honestly, he does want to go check on Matt; but that means that Stella can't go, as they aren't ready to see her yet. He just hopes that Stella is okay with that. But only time will tell. So, here goes nothing. "I think I should go alone tomorrow."

To say that Stella was a bit taken back over what Kelly just told her was an understatement, as that was not what she was expecting her husband to tell her; to tell her that he wants to go to his appointment alone tomorrow, rather than have her go with him. I mean, is he still ashamed of having PTSD? Because last time they spoke about it, she told him that it's nothing to be ashamed of. I mean, Matt has PTSD; so why would he be worried about having his best friend think differently about him? And right now, that was exactly where Stella wanted to take this conversation, as she wanted to speak to her husband; and she wanted to figure out just what was going through his mind at the moment, as he asked her not to come tomorrow. "Okay, before you even say anything….I am telling you right now Kelly Severide that's not going to happen. I am your wife, and we are going as a family tomorrow." Kelly sighed and agreed.

After which, he decided to get closer to her; tugging her body against his in the process, Kelly smiled as he proceeded to close the covers on top of the both of them so that he could hold the woman he loves close to him. So that he could cuddle up to her, and just take it easy with him. And that was due to the fact that he didn't want to make her mad right now. Rather, he wants her to take it easy and just relax. And if she yells, that's the last thing that she's going to do; she isn't going to relax, and she's going to get all agitated. And honestly, Kelly isn't all that interested in going to the hospital with his wife right now; because after they get her checked out, he already knows where she's going to want to go…she's going to want to go to a place where she isn't wanted at the moment. And that was the entire reason why he didn't want her to come in the first place, so that he could go visit his best friend at the hospital.

But he guesses that there's another way that he can go, but she may not like it; as it means that she's going to have to stay away from her best friend, if they are even still best friends right now. Their relationship is still a bit complicated at the moment, and we all know why that is; but still, Kelly feels like he has an obligation to share the reason why he didn't want her to come to the hospital with him so that she can understand. "Kelly, you still there? Or are you really going to just try and guilt me into not coming, because I want to come tomorrow as your wife." Kelly agreed with Stella as she said that, well aware that was the case. "And I understand that, but there's something that you don't know; and that we need to talk about ahead of tomorrow then." Stella agreed with Kelly as he told her that, just going ahead with listening to her husband. "And what might that be?" Kelly sighed as Stella asked him that question.

"Okay, before you get mad at me…remember that I'm just the messenger right now." Stella agreed with her husband as he said that, well aware that was the case. "So, here's the thing, I was going to go visit Matt and Gabby while I was at the hospital tomorrow…" Stella then started to realize where this conversation was going, and just took a breath as she looked down. "I can only assume that they don't want me there right now?" Moving his hand to Stella's hip, Kelly got even closer to her while tugging her against his chest; after which, Stella put her hand on his chest. "Listen, I hope you know that it pains me to say this Stella. But I am just the messenger, and I am trying to be on your side here; I really am Stella." Stella agreed with her husband. "But Stella, I can't put that aside. Because I have been best friends with Matt, much longer than I have known you. And honestly, as much as I love you…I understand him."

Just looking up at Kelly, Stella was a bit taken aback. "Stella, just take a breath and look at me. Remember, I want to be on your side. But I know what Matt went through last time he went through this, and the first time that he went through this. I was there both time that Gabby was in the hospital, after complications with her pregnancy. The first time, they lost the baby. The second time, it was a premature birth of their first surviving children; and this time, it was at the hands of my own wife…." Stella sighed and just looked down. "Stella, as much as I love you…do you really think that I can just do that to Matt?" Stella was a bit confused as she heard Kelly say that. "Do what?" Kelly sighed. "Stella, I've known you for four years; I've known Matt for almost two decades. As much as I love you, I can't just look past that; look past two decades of friendship, especially not when we've been through so much together."

Stella took a breath, just listening to Kelly. "Stella, you have to understand. I was there when we graduated the academy together, when we lost Andy together, when Matt lost Hallie, when he found love again, when he got engaged to Gabby again, and when they lost their first child. And we weren't even together when they got married, when they lost Louie. Stella, my friendship with Matt has gone through so much; things that predate our romantic relationship and can't be just thrown to the side…especially not with Matt." Stella was a bit confused with that phrase. "What do you mean 'especially not with Matt?'" Taking a breath, Kelly sighed. "Stella, he has PTSD. And there are some things, that only we can understand; the pain when we lost Andy, it's something that ties us together. Because he was our best friend, and Matt had to watch him die in front of his eyes. You didn't know Andy; I remember the dates of all the times he thinks about Andy; because they are the same days that I think about him too…" Stella agreed with Kelly.

"His birthday, the day he married Heather…and just how happy he was; the day Griffin was born, the day Ben was born; the days he learned Heather was pregnant, and when she said yes to marrying him. Those are days that we share. Memories that we have together. Memories that you understand, and that we share on a deep level; and that's why there are times where I hate being in this position, where I want to support both my friend…and my wife. But there are times where I know Matt needs me, but he doesn't need you. Stella, his daughters could die; and he needs support from his only brother, and that's hard to think about…but it's the truth. And that's why I need to keep a relationship with Matt, regardless of whether you're in a good place with Gabby." Stella agreed with Kelly as he said that. "My relationship with Matt, has to stay independent of your relationship with Gabby; but honestly, I can't help but understand where he's coming from. Stella, he already lost a woman he loves. He already lost three children." Stella sighed.

"He already lost a best friend, and I am not letting loose another one…just because our wives are not in the best place. Yes, can this put a strain on our marriage? Of course, it can, and it probably will. But I think this is just something I need to do, so that Matt doesn't feel alone; because he doesn't have anybody that he's close to, because we have a sibling relationship that he doesn't have with his sister. So that's why I need to go alone tomorrow, so that I can be there for my brother; so that I can see him, and not be sent away just because you're there. And the truth is, I need him too." Stella was confused as she looked up at Kelly. "He's just gone through this PTSD stuff, and I want him to help me through it; regardless of whether you're in a good place with Gabby, because we share the Andy PTSD. And we share a lot of stuff as firefighters, because we've been firefighters for so long together; and friends before that. So, that's just where I'm at, and I hope that you can forgive me for wanting to go in without you." Stella agreed and smiled.

"That's fine. I understand." Kelly smiled as he bent down, before kissing her softly. "I promise, next appointment; because I'll talk to him, and try and start thawing the ice. But right now, they need time to just get through this hard time; they need to know that their daughters are going to be okay, and that they'll be able to take them home. And I just don't feel like they're in that place yet, which is why you really can't come; because I don't want Matt to have too much PTSD about this, especially when he probably already does…"