It starts out with me working in my room and I see the viewers.
Me: [to the Viewers] Oh hello everyone. Today is December 24th, AKA Christmas Eve and I can't wait for tomorrow. I'm just putting the finishing touches on all my gifts to Varie and my friends. I've been working on them since early November. This is my 1st ever Christmas here in Michigan. My grandma, Aunts and Uncles and relatives are coming over from Colorado and my dad went to go pick them all up at the airport. Varie is helping mom with cooking the Christmas dinner and Naruto is helping around the Loud House [I get back to work and finished my work] Perfect. Everything is ready. Now to go see my friends and get ready for Christmas.
I slide down a tube that leads from my room into Lincoln's Room.
[the whole mansion and the guest houses are decorated with a whole bunch of Christmas decorations, then zooms into Lincoln and Linka's room.]
Lincoln: [pulls on his snow pants and talks to the viewers.] "It's the day before Christmas" [puts an orange sweater on over his head.] "and there's no better time to be in the Loud House." [puts on a Charlie Brown Christmas-esque cap. I slide in and greet him]
Me: Hey Lincoln. Are you excited to have the greatest Christmas ever?
Lincoln: I sure am J.D. I can't wait.
Me: Where's Linka?
Lincoln: She's around. Lets go look for her.
[Me and Lincoln exit his bedroom and pulls off Lana's scarf, causing her to spin into the bathroom. I use the Force and stop her from spinning.]
Lana: Thanks J.D.
Me: No problem Lana.
Luna: [singing] " Christmas time is totally rad / I want those gifts, so I won't be bad! " [stops her song and groans] "Aww! Come on!"
Me: I thought that was pretty good Luna.
Luna: Oh thank you J.D.
Lincoln: "Having trouble with this year's Christmas song, Luna?"
Luna: "Bros, I'm stuck like Santa in a chimney!" [inspired] "Ooh! That's not bad!" [starts singing a new song] " I'm stuck like Santa in a chimney! I've been good all year, so gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme! " [stops yet again] "Aww, rubbish!"
Me: You'll figure something out Luna.
Luan: [pops out, dressed as a reindeer. Luna glares at her] "I'll say! Those lyrics make no frankincense! [chuckles in a Santa Claus tone] "That's one!" [clicks on a remote resulting in a counter appearing with the number 1 on a Christmas tree.]
I laugh at Luan's pun.
Me: Good one Luan.
Luan: "Thanks. My twelve puns of Christmas are off to a great start. I've only got to come up with eleven myrrh!" [chuckles] "Make that ten!" [clicks her remote and the counter now says 2.]
I laugh again and Eddy appears.
Eddy: Don't worry Luan! Yule get to 12! [Chuckles like Santa] That's three of our 12 Puns of Christmas.
[Counter with a 3 appears]
I laugh at Eddy's pun.
Me: Good one Eddy. Is Christmas your favorite holiday?
Eddy: [Sighs] No it isn't J.D. Christmas got bad for me because all I ever got was clothes.
Me: Oh. That can get pretty monotonous can it?
Eddy: Yep. But that doesn't matter anymore cause the greatest gift I've ever got was moving here to Royal Woods and being with Luan.
Luan: Oh Eddy. [Eddy and Luan Kiss]
Me, Lily and Lincoln: AAAAWWWWW!
Lily: You two are so cute together and I can tell you both were made for eachother.
Eddy: Thanks Lily.
Leni: [walks up the stairs wearing a red and green dress and ornament earrings.] "Hey, J.D., Lincoln! I just made the perfect Christmas outfit."
Me: You look beautiful in that dress Leni. Where's Ed?
Leni: He's in the Living Room helping mom put up the decorations.
Me: Oh. Okay.
Rita: [off screen] Hey, has anyone seen my plaid Christmas table cloth?
[Leni looks down and notices that she used the table cloth, then shushes Lincoln as she walks into her room.]
Eddy: Double D is downstairs in the kitchen helping L Sr. with the Christmas dinner.
Me: Okay. We were just about to head downstairs anyway.
Lori: [on her phone, talking to Bobby] "Oh, don't worry about buying me a gift, Bobby Future Hubby Boo-Boo Bear. I mean, sure, it's our very first Christmas together" [split screen widens to show Bobby, Lori's voice is still heard over the phone.] "and I'll probably remember what you give me for the rest of our lives, but no pressure."[zooms away from Bobby in the calendar section of the mall, holding two calendars. He switches his phone to his other ear.]
Bobby: [on his phone, talking to Lori] "Right. Uh, no pressure, Babe." [chuckles and hangs up before falling on his knees and crying.]
[return to the Knudson-Loud-Anderson House where Lincoln is at the bottom of the steps. He pulls out two different boots out of a pile that are each one of his sisters.]
[Laney is seen in the Living Room writing a letter and Crysta is watching her]
Laney: "Dear Santa, I've been a very good girl this year and I think I should get..." Hmm... What do I want this year...? Ooh! "A new fashionable beret" ... No wait I already got that one. [Crosses it out from the letter] Maybe a... no got that too.
Crysta: Asking for stuff from Santa must be tough.
Laney: It sure is Crysta. I don't know what to ask for. I'm trying to think. [Me and Lincoln come down the stairs and Laney and Crysta come to us] Hey guys. Can you help me? I'm writing a letter for Santa, but I can't decide what should I get this year.
Lincoln: "Relax Laney. I'm sure you'll think of something.
Me: You've been awesome this year Laney. I have a feeling he will give you something good.
Laney: I have a feeling you're right J.D. Thank you.
Me: You're welcome. [to Crysta] Is this your first ever Christmas, Crysta?
Crysta: It sure is. What is Christmas again?
Me: It's the day we celebrate the birthday of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. He was born on December 25th the year Zero. I am a very religious person and a strong follower of Jesus Christ. [Scene transits with me standing under the cloudy sky with light rays shining through the clouds and the divine chorus of angels from Heaven sings as I stand with my hands in a prayer position and I have a halo over my head.]
Laney: Wow. I can see that.
Crysta: Me too.
Lincoln: [Pulls out two different boots out of a pile that are each of one of his sisters.] Oops! Wrong ones!" [throws the boots out of the way; to the viewers.] "Excuse me. This might take a while."
Me: No problem Lincoln.
[Lincoln prepares to dive into the boot pile when Lola zooms in.]
Lola: [appearing very innocent] "Hey there, favorite big brother! Allow me to dive into that pile of smelly sweaty footwear and find your winter boots for you. "[curtsies, then dives into the pile.]
[Lincoln looks on in confusion. Lola then emerges from the pile with two brown boots.]
Lola: [gasps for air] "Here you are, good sir!" [puts Lincoln's winter boots on his feet.] "Two big brother boots. Boy, these are stylish!"
Laney: Wow, Lola. That's oddly nice of you?
Lola: Why thank you, dear sister.
Lincoln: [suspicious] "Okay, what do you want?"
Lola: [quiet voice with an evil grin on her face.] "To get a good haul from Santa." [normal voice] "See, contrary to popular belief, I am no angel. So, if I'm going to get on Santa's nice list, I have one day to undo twelve months of naughty!"
Me: Technically you already are an angel because of your powers.
Lola: That's true. I do have wings and I have done some good deeds but I want to undo all my naughty stuff.
Lisa: [off screen] "You're wasting your time." [wheels in a whiteboard with equations as she comes on screen and begins pointing to sections with a candy cane.] "Factoring in sleigh speed, time zone changes, and reindeer bathroom breaks, it is scientifically impossible for this so-called Kris Kringle to deliver gifts to the approximately one billion qualifying children. As you can see, X equals no stinkin' way." [bites into her candy cane.]
Me: Actually there's currently 1.7 billion children around the world according to the 2016 census and the number is still growing.
Lisa: Ah. You are correct about that. Thank you.
Laney: [Gasps] Are you saying there's no such thing as Santa?
Lisa: Precisely.
Lola: [growls] "You're lucky I'm being nice right now!"
Me: Don't listen to her guys. Of course there is such a thing as Santa. I've always known.
Laney: Really?
Me: Sure. As long as you believe and have a strong faith. Also, lets just say that I've even met him personally myself along with several other children that didn't believe it at first.
Laney: [Shocked] You've met Santa Claus!?
Me: Yep. Not to brag but I've had an awesome event happen to me back when I was 7. I'll tell you all later.
Laney: Okay.
[Geo, in a Santa cap with a bell on it, rolls on screen and passes the Christmas tree. Charles is sleeping underneath, dreaming of sugarplums, and Cliff is batting at the lights on the tree. Both of them are in Christmas sweaters. The screen pans to Walt in a scarf flying to a partridge in a pear tree decoration. He lands on the branch and flirts with the fake partridge before it falls down.]
Ed and Lily are helping Rita with the decorations.
Lily: Here mom. [Hands Rita her purple stocking]
Rita: Thank you sweety. [nailing a purple stocking for Lily to the wall at a distance from the fireplace where the other Louds' stockings are hung and next to a pink one for Lola.] "You know what I want for Christmas? A bigger fireplace."
Me: I think I can arrange that Ms. Rita. Stand back. [Rita stands back and I Chant an Incantation] Lecaria Nexmortun Rylium!
I fire a rainbow stream and the fireplace grew to the size of a mansion grand fireplace. It was the same size as my Grand Fireplace in the main living room of my mansion.
Rita: Thank you J.D.! This is incredible! It's absolutely breathtaking.
Me: You're welcome Ms. Rita.
Ed: This is a beautiful fireplace.
Me: It's an exact replica of my grand fireplace in my dads study.
Rita: It's amazing.
Luan: [pops up, holding a holly berry] "What's that, Mom? I can holly hear you!" [chuckles and clicks her remote] "That's four!"
[The counter says 4]
Me and Ed laugh.
Me: Good one Luan.
Ed: Funny!
Lily: Very funny.
Luan: "Lily, are you [picks up her yellow stocking] stocking me?" [off screen after the screen pans to Lincoln, chuckles and clicks her remote.] "That's five!"
[Counter says 5]
Laney walks over still deciding her gift and Crysta is flying by her.
Laney: Maybe I can get a new canvas? Hmm...
[Laney joins up with me and Lincoln and they turn around a corner to find Lynn lifting a dresser and Lucy looking underneath.]
Lynn: "See anything?"
Lucy: "Nope."
[Lynn puts the dresser down and winds her arm.]
Laney: Are they looking for gifts too?
Me: Looks like it.
Lincoln: "Mom and dad's gifts specifically. [whispers] Have you checked Dad's underwear drawer?"
Lynn: [sarcastically, walking away] "Have we checked Dad's underwear drawer?"
Lucy: "Lincoln, please. This is not our first rodeo."
Me: I can tell you want gifts from your mom and dad Lynn, Lucy.
Lynn: Yep.
Laney: At least you guys don't have trouble finding gifts. [Smells something from the kitchen] Mmm. What's that smell?
Me: (Sniffs) It smells delicious.
[Me, Lincoln and Laney walks in the kitchen wondering what the smell was. We see Lynn Sr., Anastasia, Gabrielle, Double D, and Linka cooking in the kitchen]
Lynn Sr.: [singing] "Dashing to the stove... [stops singing] Hey J.D., kids! You're just in time to try the Crown Jewel of Ol' Dad's Christmas Eve feast...[Opens the pot and smoke comes out all over the kitchen.]...The Figgy Pudding!"
[Smoke comes through the window.]
Me: It looks delicious Mr. Lynn but I want to wait until dinner.
Lincoln: [chuckles] "And ruin the surprise at dinner? I don't think so!"
Laney: [Coughs] I think it may be a bit- [Lincoln covers her mouth]
Lincoln: Better than last year! [nervously grins; whispers to Laney] He's very emotional when it comes to Christmas cooking.
Laney: [Whispers] Oh, Sorry.
Anastasia: Here guys. Try my blintzes. Romanov recipe. [Anastasia comes over with a plate of blintzes filled with cream cheese and jelly]
Me: Ooh. I haven't had blintzes in a while. [I try one and it was delicious] Vkusno.
Anastasia: Spasibo.
Me: Pozhaluysta.
Linka: I didn't know you learned how to speak Russian J.D.
Me: Johann has been teaching me how to speak Russian. It's a hard language, but he is a great language teacher.
Linka: I can believe it. I'm making an India Allahabadi cake. It's an Indian Christmas Rum Fruit cake. Varya taught me how to make India Food of different holidays.
Lincoln: That looks really tasty Linka.
Linka also has a big pot by her.
Linka: I'm also making Louisiana Shrimp and Crayfish Gumbo.
Laney: Oh boy! I love Louisiana food.
Linka takes a spoon and dips it in the pot and hands it to Laney.
Linka: Try some.
Laney slurps it and licks her lips and loves it.
Laney: Yummy. Spicy and delicious.
Linka: Thank you, Laney. I want to be a chef like dad and hes been teaching me. So I wanted to help him with our dinner.
Me: That's awesome. [I see Naruto cooking a big pot of ramen and Teuchi and Ayame are with him] Hey little brother, Teuchi, Ayame.
Naruto: Hey J.D.
Teuchi: Hey J.D. Naruto called us over to cook dinner for you all.
Ayame: We were honored to help out.
Me: I can see that. We have an international flare going on this year don't we?
Edd: We sure do. And I think it's wonderful to share different foods for Christmas Dinner.
Lynn Sr.: It sure is Double D.
A teapot starts whistling and Gabrielle takes the tea pot off and pours a couple of cups of tea. She brings one over to me.
Gabrielle: [British Accent] Here J.D. It's Darjeeling Tea.
Me: Ohh. Very strong British tea. I haven't had this in a while. [I extend my pinky and take a sip and it was good] Good tea Gabrielle. [British Accent] Jolly Good.
Gabrielle: Thank you J.D. darling.
Lynn Sr.: Everyone is loving Christmas huh?
Me: You said it Mr. Lynn
Luan: "Look at Dad getting figgy with it! [chuckles and clicks her remote] Number six!"
[Counter says 6]
Me: [Laughing] Good one.
Lynn Sr.: Ah, I love the 12 Puns of Christmas. Luan, you wanna try my pudding?"
Luan: "Sorry, Dad. Yule have to ask someone else. Get it? Yule? That's seven!
Eddy: We just sleigh ourselves! Ooh, eight!" [Luan clicks her remote twice]
[The counter goes to 7 and 8 as we laugh.]
Lynn Sr.: "Sleigh!"
Me, Naruto, Eddy, Anastasia, Linka and Gabrielle laugh.
Me: That was funny.
Lincoln: [to the viewers] "Yup. Everyone around here is full of Christmas cheer".
Mr. Grouse: "[From down the street] LOUDS! What's that awful stench?"
Lincoln: "Well, everyone except for our crabby old neighbor, Mr. Grouse. He really lives up to his name. Especially around Christmas."
Me: You're former Next Door Neighbor?
Lincoln: Yep. He is crabby every time.
Laney: Don't say that guys. No one can be that grouchy during the holidays.
Mr. Grouse: "LOUDS! Turn down that annoying music! LOUDS! Shut off all those horrible lights!"
Lincoln: You were saying?
Crysta: [To Laney] What is wrong with your neighbor?
Laney: I don't really know Crysta. I think he just doesn't like us for some reason.
Lincoln: "Sheesh. [Walks outside] Well, I'm not gonna let Mr. Grouse take away our Christmas cheer. We've got a week off school, ten inches of fresh snow, and this guy! [referring to a snow sled] The Fearsome Flyer 8000! Or as I affectionately call him, "Big Red".
Me: Right on! And me neither.
Lincoln: Yep. We've been waiting all winter for the perfect sledding conditions. So if you'll excuse us..." [runs off shouting but suddenly gets caught in a net.]
Me: Lincoln!
Lana: "Woo-hoo! My reindeer net worked! Sorry, Lincoln. I'm just getting ready for tonight. [gets her brother out of the net] I'm gonna catch one to keep as a pet!"
Me: I hope you succeed Lana.
[Car tires screech and then crashes and the horn blares.]
Lana: "Woo-hoo! My reindeer pit worked! Uh, don't worry, buddy! I got a winch!" [Runs off to the car with her winch.]
[Later, Laney is seen once again in the Living Room trying to write her letter to Santa]
Laney: Maybe I should try for a more chill approach. [Writes] "Hey, Santa. What's up? How's the wife doin'?" Oh! [Crumples up the paper and throws it away] That will never work. [Just then, Lynn and Lucy come in]
Lucy: We need the sofa. [Lynn picks Laney up and sets her away from the sofa. Lynn and Lucy begin to look under the cushions. Lynn lifts the couch to see if there's any presents under it] No presents for us under here.
Laney: Still trying to find mom and dad's presents huh?
Lynn: Yeah. [Drops the sofa] And we still cant find anything!
Lucy: We could look in the basement. How do you feel about lifting up the water heater?
Lynn: [Tightens her belt] Lets do this!
Lynn and Lucy leave as Varie comes in and sits by Laney.
Varie: Hey, Laney.
Laney: Oh hey Varie. Did you just finish helping J.D.'s parents with the Christmas Dinner?
Varie: Yep. They're still working on it but Sakura, Hinata and Fu decided to take over for me. You writing a Christmas Letter to Santa?
Laney: [sighs] Yep. But it's so hard. I don't even know what I want.
Varie: I know it's tough. But you'll think of something.
[Lori pops up as the Waltz of the Sugar Plum Fairy plays. She tiptoes to the row of stockings and takes a yellow and red present out of her mother's pink stocking. She sniffs it and sighs in satisfaction. Laney grows suspicious]
Laney: Uh, Lori? What are you doing with that present?
Lori: Uh... [Hides the present behind her back] Nothing.
Laney: Hmm... [Slowly walks away]
Lori: "I don't think Mom will mind if I just peel back the corner a little." [tugs on the ribbon]
Luan: [off screen] "Hold it! [camera pans to show her] You are mistletoe-tally busted!" [Lori's eyes narrow as Luan chuckles and clicks her remote.] That's nine!"
[The counter reads 9]
Varies laughs at Luan's pun.
Laney: Ah-ha! I knew it! You're trying to get an early start on presents again, aren't you?
Lori: [high-pitched sigh] "I can't help it. The sound of the paper tearing, the smell of the tape, that moment when you stick the bow in your hair. [tackles Luan] Gimme that! [Laney pulls her back]"
Laney: Heel!
Luan: "You gotta kick this habit, Lori. We don't want a repeat of last year."
Varie: Does this always happen alot with Lori?
Laney: Lori is very impatient when Christmas comes around.
[Lori's eyes widen as a flashback of the previous Christmas starts: tearing sounds are heard as the Loud siblings, sans Lori, look on. The view changes to show Lori, rocking in an unwrapped box with several bows in her hair. Many unwrapped presents are in the background.]
Flashback Lori: [laughs] "You guys got some great stuff!"
[Flashback ends]
Laney: I wanted to unwrap that present. You spoiled the surprise.
Lori: "You're right, Luan. I gotta fight this!"
Luan: "Well, there's no time like the present! [chuckles and presses her remote] That's ten."
[Counter reads 10]
Varie laughs at Luan's pun.
Varie: That was funny Luan.
Lori: [returns the present to her mother's stocking] "I can be strong. I will not open another gift until Christmas morning."
Laney: That's the spirit, Lori! Besides, how hard can it be?
[The doorbell rings. Lori opens the door.]
Short Delivery Man: "Delivery for Miss Lori Loud." [stuffs a giant green and red present through the door.]
Lori: [reads the tag] "To Lori. Open immediately. [stops reading and groans] Universe, you are literally testing me."[The Short Delivery Man walks away but yells as a crash is heard. Letters fly off and Lana comes outside.]
Lana: "Woohoo! [runs over to see the Short Delivery Man in a metal cage.] My reindeer cage works!"
[Lori is now pushing her big present inside.]
Laney: Uh.. I'm gonna go see what J.D. and Lincoln are doing. [Walks over to the front door, puts on her coat and heads outside]
Varie: I'll come with you.
Outside, Me and Lincoln are having fun in the snow doing some sledding, snowball fights, building igloos and grinding on Ice Rails made by Lily.
Laney and Varie arrive and decide to join the fun.
Mr. Grouse: LOUDS! STOP SPLASHING SNOW ON ME!
Me: Sorry Mr. Grouse.
Mr. Grouse: Sorry's not good enough sometimes.
I walk over to Mr. Grouse's house to speak to him.
Me: [Defensive] Mr. Grouse why do you hate the Loud's so much? We haven't done anything to you.
Mr. Grouse: You wouldn't understand J.D.
Me: What would I not understand? Wait a minute. You have a big family like we all do and you seeing us reminds you of them?
Mr. Grouse: Yes. That's right.
Laney: Oh no.
Lincoln: Is that all true Mr. Grouse?
Mr. Grouse: Yes, Lincoln. It is.
Me: I'm sorry.
Mr. Grouse: JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!
Me: Come on guys.
Back at the Knudson-Loud-Anderson House, everything was hectic.
Leni: [comes down the stairs in a white dress made of tinsel.] "Hey guys! Forget what I was wearing before. This is the perfect Christmas outfit."
Rita: [from the dining room] "Has anyone seen all my tinsel?"
Leni: [shushes Lori and Luan]
Luan: "Oooh! I'm gonna tell!"
Leni: "No no no!"
Luan: [pulls on the ribbon on Leni's dress.] "Just ribbon ya! [chuckles as Leni sighs and presses her remote.] That's eleven! One more to go!"
[Counter says 11]
Eddy: You can do it Luan!
[Lola has approached her mother in the dining room.]
Lola: [feigning kindness] "Oh, mother. You've done so much to make this glorious holiday perfect. Allow me to look for the tinsel and after I find it, I'll rub your tired, aching tootsies."
Rita: [pulls paper dolls out of a box] "Thank you, Lola. That's very nice of you."
Lola: [gasps and faces skyward shaking her fist.] "Did you hear that, Santa? She said "nice"!"
Lisa: [walks in the background with her candy cane, speaking in a sing-song tone.] "Wasting your time..."
Lola: [to herself] "Control yourself, Lola. She's not worth it."
Luna: [strumming and singing] " Merry Christmas, honey / If you don't have a gift, I'll gladly take money / I wrote it down on my Christmas list / If I don't get my prezzies, I'm gonna get- [gets cut off by Mr. Grouse.]
Mr. Grouse: "LOUDS! KNOCK OFF THAT RACKET!" [leaves his house]
ACT 2
[Inside the Loud House, Lola is vacuuming and dusting, Luan is making a popcorn string, Lisa is still reading her book, and Lucy is contacting spirits as Lynn watches on with hope.]
Lucy: "Oh, Ghost of Christmas Past...reveal to us where the presents are hidden."
Lynn: [anxious] "What'd he say? What'd he say?"
Luan: "You two definitely have the Christmas spirit!" [chuckles and presses her remote] "YES! That's Twelve! We did it!"
[The counter now reads 12.]
Eddy: All right Luan! [Eddy and Luan kiss]
[Cliff avoids a bear trap Lana laid out.]
Lori: [stir-crazy] "Can't take it any longer! MUST OPEN!" [rushes toward her present]
Lana: [lassos her with the lights] "Whoa, girl!" [drags her back]
Luna: "Guys, can you chill? I'm trying to write and I'm down to the wire!" [inspired] "Ooh! Maybe that's it!" [starts playing and singing] " Down to the wire / Santa's on fire " [groaning] "I'm never gonna get this!"
[Me, Varie, Lincoln Laney and Lily come inside]
Lincoln: "Guys!"
[Little does he know that a lot has been happening since he was outside upon seeing the insanity. Enter Leni with yet another new Christmas outfit.]
Leni: "Okay, forget that old rag I was wearing before. This is the perfect Christmas outfit!"
Rita: [noticing something amiss by the chimney.] "What happened to the stockings? Seriously, why does everything keep disappearing?"
[Leni shushes everyone again]
Lincoln: "GUYS!"
[He still can't get their attention and Lily pops out of one of the stockings on Leni's outfit.]
[Enter their dad with the figgy pudding.]
Lynn Sr.: "Hey hey hey! I need a taste tester for my figgy pudding!"
Lola: "I'll do it, Daddy! Your figgy pudding is always the highlight of my Christmas!" [looking skyward desperately] "You're seeing this, right, Santa?"
Lisa: [almost done with her candy cane] "Truly pathetic."
'[Her dad feeds Lola some of the pudding.]
Lola: [chews it forcefully] "Mmm...figgy!"
Lincoln: "GUYS! WOULD YOU JUST STOP AND LISTEN TO US FOR A SECOND?!"
[The girls stop and notice their brother, sisters and friends.]
Lincoln: "We were just in Mr. Grouse's House..."
[The girls start complaining about their neighbor.]
Lola: "That big meanie?"
Leni: "He dresses, like, horribly!"
Lori: "He is literally awful!"
Laney: Guys, please! He's not that bad.
Lincoln: "Well, he is, but now we think we know why."
Lily: Here's what we learned.
[Cut to an exterior shot of the house as time passes and back inside with Lincoln finishing explaining to everyone why Mr. Grouse is the way he is.]
Lincoln: "...And then he told us to leave."
[His sisters' heartstrings are tugged at upon hearing this.]
Lori: [on the verge of tears] "That is literally so sad!"
Lana: [downtrodden] "I can't believe he has a big family, too."
Luan: [heartbroken] "And he can't be with them? That's awful!"
Eddy: I had no idea he has a big family either.
Gabrielle: That is sad. I had no idea.
Linka: Me neither.
Edd: I don't think any of us knew about this.
Leni: "Seeing all of us together must make him miss them even more."
Shannon: I know.
Ed: That's sad guys.
Lisa: "Usually, I'm impervious to human emotions, but..." [bursts into tears and sobs over the news. Laney comforts her]
Lola: [remorseful] "No wonder he's such a grumpy-butt this time of year."
Luan: "How did we not notice this?"
Lori: [pushes her present aside] "Maybe because we've been so caught up in the hustle and bustle of the holidays."
Lynn: "Yeah. We were so worried about what we were getting."
Lucy: [blows out her candles] "When we should have been worried about what we were giving."
Lola: "And isn't that what Christmas is all about?"
Laney: Exactly! Someone needs to show him that you need presents to have a holiday.
Luna: [gasps with inspiration] "Dudes! That's it! No wonder I couldn't nail my song! I've been going about it all wrong!" [goes upstairs to write it]
Lincoln: "We need to do something for Mr. Grouse."
Me: I agree.
Laney: All in favor?
Sisters: "Yeah!"
Lily: Lets do it!
Lori: "But what can we do?"
Lincoln: "I have a plan!" [huddles up with them] "Okay, the first thing we do..."
After the plan was revealed I run to my mom and dad. My Aunt Mikki, Aunt Cheryl, Uncle Tony, Aunt Ginger, Grandma Mayme, cousins Ciera, Lauren and Nick and tell them everything. I tell Riley and her parents, the Teen Titans, Jessie, Aylene and her family, the CasaGrande's and Santiagos Woody, as well as everyone in the Leaf our plan and we got ready.
[Later that night, Mr. Grouse is getting some sleep in his lounger until a mysterious sound wakes him up.]
Voices: " Ooooooooh "
Mr. Grouse: [waking up] "Huh? Who? What? Can't get a moment's peace." [turns on the light and goes outside to see something that surprises him.]
[The Knudson's Loud's, Andersons, McBrides, Leaf Shinobi, The Ed's and Sarah, the Teen Titans, The Santiagos and CasaGrandes and everyone are all caroling in front of his house.]
Everyone: " Ooooooooh "
Luna:
" I used to think that Christmas was
About the wish list filled with stuff
I never really needed, anyway "
[Lori presses a button and lights up Mr. Grouse's house and yard with decorations.]
Luna:
" But as long as we're together
It's a holiday "
[Everyone joins in as Luna starts strumming her guitar.]
Everyone:
" It's not what you get, it's what you give
We've got the spirit, clear and loud
Ditch the list, hug who you're with
'Cause that's what Christmas is all about!
It's what you give, not what you get
We've got the hard part figured out
This year will be the best one yet
'Cause that's what Christmas is all about!
Merry Christmas from the Louds!
HO!"
[Mr. Grouse is still standing surprised from their caroling.]
Lincoln: "Merry Christmas, Mr. Grouse."
Terra: We all heard about what went down.
Lana: "So We all chipped in and got you something."
[Lincoln gives him the present and Mr. Grouse opens it.]
Lynn: "It's a bus ticket."
Luan: "So you can go see your family for Christmas tomorrow."
Rita: "And since you can't be with them tonight we're bringing our family to you."
Lynn Sr.: "How 'bout it, neighbor?"
Me: How about it friend?
[Everyone huddles together and smiles.]
Mr. Grouse: [sternly] "EVERYONE!" [thankfully] "You've made this the best Christmas ever. Thank you. I'd say you all landed permanent spots on Santa's nice list."
Lola: [joyfully] "Even me?"
Mr. Grouse: "Even you."
Me: Think nothing of it Mr. Grouse.
[Lola runs up and hugs Mr. Grouse's leg.]
Lisa: "Once again..." [bursts into tears and sobs again.]
I comfort Lisa.
Mr. Grouse: "Well, what are you waiting for? Everyone inside!"
[Inside Mr. Grouse's house, to the tune of We Wish You a Merry Christmas, the twins are setting the table for Christmas dinner, Lily flew up and put the star on top of the tree, and everyone is doing what they can to make the house more festive.]
Luan: "There, Mr. Grouse. Now it's not so gloomy in here."
Lucy: "Yeah, you ruined it."
Leni: "Guys, I finally made the perfect Christmas outfit!"
[Everyone looks at the outfit wondering why it's not Christmas themed.]
Laney: Not so Christmas-y, don't you think?
Leni: "It's not for me. It's for Mr. Grouse. You can wear it on your trip tomorrow." [puts it on him]
Mr. Grouse: "Well, thank you." [notices something] "What happened to my curtains?"
[Leni shushes him]
Lynn Sr.: "Chow time in five, people!"
Mr. Grouse: "Before we sit down, there's something I'd like to say."
Lynn: [chanting] "Speech! Speech! Speech!"
[Lori nudges her to stop]
Mr. Grouse: "Well, I know I haven't always been the friendliest neighbor, and I'm sorry about that. You've all given me so much tonight, now I'd like to give something to you."
Lola: "We take checks."
[Lori nudges her for that statement. Mr. Grouse opens his closet and reveals all the stuff that landed in his yard and he took as his own.]
The Loud Sisters: [gasp] "ALL OUR STUFF!"
[They all gather to get their stuff back with cheers.]
Lana: [holding up her plunger] "PLUNGEY!"
Me: Wow. That's a lot of Stuff Mr. Grouse had taken before we all merged houses.
Starfire: You said it J.D.
Howard: [overjoyed] "Oh, Hare-Bear. Isn't this the most wonderful thing you've ever seen?"
Harold: "Now, Howie, remember what Dr. Lopez said about-" [shaking it off] "Oh, forget Dr. Lopez! This is the most wonderful thing I've ever seen!"
[Both Clyde's dads walk off sobbing with happiness. Lori walks up to Clyde.]
Lori: "Clyde, you know what you're standing under, don't you?" [points to a mistletoe]
[Clyde realizes this and starts shaking. Lori gives him a smooch on his cheek.]
Lori: "Merry Christmas, Clyde."
Clyde: [blushing and lovestruck] "And to all a good night." [faints]
Lynn Sr.: "Come on, everybody, sit! Dinner is served! And save some room for the figgy pudding!"
[Everyone rushes over to the table to join for dinner.]
[December 25th, Christmas morning]
Loud Family: "MERRY CHRISTMAS!" [open up their presents]
[Lisa got a new meteorite, Gabrielle got a new tea kit from England, Luna got a new banjo, Lincoln got a new video game, Lily got a new dart blaster, Anastasia got a 3-D puzzle of the St. Basils Cathedral, Lucy got a glittering Edwin bust and some new spell books, Shannon got some books on law, order, crime and punishment, Luan got a magic and comedy kit, Linka got a new video gaming console, Penny got a book on rocks and minerals, Lynn got new cleats, Leni got new high-heel shoes, Lana got a medieval war fortress play set, Lola got a princess castle play set and Laney got a new painting kit.]
Me, Varie, Aylene, Riley, Jessie, the Ed's, Sarah, Jeri, Maria and Ronnie Anne, Woody, Naruto and the girls, Sasuke, Mikoto, Minato and Kushina, the Teen Titans and Clyde come in and we all have Christmas hats on.
Me: Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas everyone!
Loud's: Merry Christmas guys!
Me: I got you guys each something.
Lincoln and the girls: You did?
Me: Yeah. For you Lincoln, I made you a comic book.
Lincoln: Oh really? What's it about?
Me: It's about all of us and how we went on great adventures all over the world. Fighting numerous bad guys and more. Read the back. There's a special dedication.
(Lincoln reads the dedication on the back)
Lincoln: "This book is dedicated to a great man, Lincoln Loud. A great, kind-hearted, intelligent, happy-go-lucky man of lightning who keeps his cool and has a plan for every situation and my true best friend." [Lincoln's eyes tear up and he hugs me.] Thank you J.D.
Me: You're welcome buddy.
Ronnie Anne approached Lincoln.
Ronnie Anne: Lame-o this is from me.
Ronnie Anne kissed Lincoln.
Everyone: AAAAAWWWWWWW!
Me: That is so adorable. For you Lori, I made you a picture.
Lori opens the package and gasps. It was a picture of Lori and Bobby Flying and Ronnie Anne was hugging her and holding on tight.
Lori: Aaaaawwww! "Lori and Bobby, Husband and Wife and loving family." Thank you J.D.! I'll treasure it forever! [Lori kisses me on the cheek]
Me: You're welcome Lori. Leni I made you a beautiful winter dress.
Leni opens the package and gasps. It was a Sea Foam Green Russian Style Fur Coat.
Leni: Thank you so much J.D. [She kisses me on the cheek too]
Me: You're welcome. Luna, this for you.
Luna opens her gift and it's a CD.
Luna: A CD?
Me: Listen and you'll see.
Luna puts in the CD and it was Mick Swagger.
Mick Swagger: [Brittish Accent] I'd like to dedicate this song to my Number 1 fan Luna Loud and here to help me sing it is J.D. Knudson.
Me: Merry Christmas Luna Loud! YEAH!
Mick: [Singing] It was a hot June night when she saw the light.
Me: [Singing in British Accent] Up until then she didn't know what was right.
Mick: She showed up at the show all confused and alone.
Me: She had no idea what was about to unfold.
Me and Mick: TRANSFORMATION / TRANSFORMATION.
Mick: A Citizen of the Rock and Roll Nation.
Me and Mick: TRANSFORMATION / TOTAL MUTATION.
2 minutes later we all cheered and Luna was in tears of joy and she hugged me.
Luna: Thank you dude. You are awesome.
Me: I went to a Mick Swagger concert on December 22nd and told Mick it was for you. I sent copies to all your friends. It was awesome going to a Mick Swagger Concert.
Luna and Me did the Rock on Hand Sign.
Me: For Luan I made you a joke book. I put in every single joke I know. You can use them for your next gig.
Luan: Thanks J.D. [Luan hugs me]
Eddy: I have something for Luan too. [He walks up to Luan and gives her a rose] I also have a poem for you. Lucy helped me make it. I call it the Prank Shop Angel.
"You're as funny as clowns at the fair, yet your jokes raise me higher than the air, You are an angelic light that shines in the prank shop of love and I will always treasure you my funny little turtle dove."
Everyone: AAAAWWWW!
Luan: Eddy I love you!
Luan jumps into Eddy's arms and kisses him passionately.
Me: [Sniffs and wipes away a tear] That was beautiful.
Starfire: Robin that was so romantic.
Robin: It sure was.
Kole: That was sure beautiful.
Me: For you Lynn.
I give her the present, she opens it and gasps.
Lynn: Wow! It's a bunch of golf balls! They're the only balls I don't have.
Me: Those are some extra golf balls I've had in my golf bag for a while. I found those years ago and I figured you might like them.
Lynn: Thanks buddy!
Lynn gives me a great hug.
Me: [Squished] Don't mention it.
She lets go of me.
Me: Gabrielle, this is for you.
Gabrielle opens the package and gasps.
Gabrielle: A music box. [It was shaped in the form of Planet Earth. She winds it up and it opens and it shows Terra, Lynn and Gabrielle in a crystal cave going around different areas and it plays Celine Dion's "My Heart Will Go On" from "Titanic"]
Terra: That is so cool!
Lynn: That is beautiful.
Gabrielle: love it!
Me: I made that myself in woodshop at school before Christmas break. It took me 7 days to make it. What gave me the idea for it was when Terra and Lynn went into Journey to the Center of The Earth.
Gabrielle hugged me.
Gabrielle: Thank you J.D.
Me: You're welcome. Shannon, I got you this.
I hand Shannon a big package and she opens it and gasps.
Shannon: It's a punching bag and it has a picture of the Black Daffodil Gang on it.
Me: I put that on there so you can vent out frustration on your old gang. Think of it as a stress reliever.
Shannon: Cool! Thanks J.D.
Me: You're welcome. Linka, this is for you. But it's outside.
We all head outside and Linka saw a tesla ball there.
Linka: Oh I see what I have to do.
Linka put her hands on the ball and channeled Lightning into it and fireworks went off and spelled a message in the sky. It said "Merry Christmas Linka from J.D. and Double D."
Me: Me and Double D planned this all out for you.
Edd: It was mostly my idea Linka. I wanted to tell you that I did this gift all from my heart.
Linka: Oh Double D. I love you!
Linka and Double D kissed.
Everyone: AAAAAAWWWWWWW!
Back inside I resumed my gifts for everyone.
Me: Lucy I have this for you.
Lucy opens my gift and it was a spellbook on Dark Magic.
Lucy: Gasp. It's a spellbook.
Me: Yep. I found that one and figured you might like it. I also have a poem written for you. Ahem. I call it: "Lucy the Dark Angel."
"You're as Dark as night, have hair like tar. And Sometimes we may forget where you are. You're an angel of darkness that killed Reverend Kane and some people may find that you are insane. But you are you. You are the only one who knows how to turn dark things into fun. So here's a poem for my very best friend. Who I will continue to root for and support until the end. Evil spirits better watch out, for Lucy Loud the Dark Angel is out and about."
Lucy had tears in her eyes and she ran and hugged me.
Lucy: Thank you 2nd brother.
Me: Anytime my Angel of Darkness. I also have someone here to see you.
The door opened and in came Silas.
Lucy: Silas.
Silas: Merry Christmas Lucy. I brought you this. [Silas pulled in a handcrafted coffin.]
Me: I helped Silas build that coffin for you. It's made out of mahogany and walnut wood and look on the side there. I added something special.
Lucy and Silas saw a piece of duct tape hiding something. They pulled it off and it was a skull with a black heart in the middle of it's forehead and it said "Lucy and Silas forever in darkness and love" in white letters.
Silas: Thank you J.D. If I had a heart, it would die with joy.
Lucy: Same here.
Me: You're both welcome. For Laney I made this.
Laney opens up the package and it was a painting of all of us standing under the beauty of the curtains of the Aurora Australis over Torres del Paine in Patagonia, Chile.
Laney: J.D. this is beautiful!
Me: I drew that in art class and I started it on November 5th and finished it on December 18th. I call it "Family in Patagonian Beauty".
Laney: Thank you J.D.
Laney hugs me and I hug her back.
Me: You're welcome. Now for the twins. I made you each something. Here's yours Lana.
Lana opened her present and it was a picture of an ice castle in an ice cave. Lana is with Elsa from 2013's "Frozen" and they are using their ice powers to fight off an evil army of Snow Demons.
Lana: This is awesome! I look amazing with Elsa!
Me: I figured you and Elsa would be perfect. I made that image on the computer. Those snow demons you two are fighting are evil monsters from the Netherworld. There's a message on the bottom left.
Lana: "Lana, you are the strongest handyman I've ever known and you definitely can get the job done. Your love for animals is as strong as your heart. The Cold will never bother you as long as you believe in yourself. My little Handyman of Ice." This is awesome! [Hugs me] Thanks J.D.
Me: You're welcome. Now for Lola.
Lola sees that it's a picture of her with 2010's Rapunzel from "Tangled" and they are fighting Gothel in a Volcano field and Lola is using fire powers and Rapunzel is using a frying pan during the fight.
Lola: I look awesome fighting with Rapunzel! Princesses VS Evil Villains.
Me: There's a message on the bottom right.
Lola reads it
Lola: "Lola, you are an awesome princess and beauty pageant hero. Keep winning all those beauty pageants and make all your friends and family proud and your tea parties will forever be awesome. My little Princess of Fire." [Lola hugs me] Thank you J.D.
Me: You're welcome Lola. Here's your gift Penny.
Penny opened her gift and she gasped.
Penny: A friend for Teddy! [It was a grey hand-sewed teddy bear]
Me: I made it myself. Teddy looked a little lonely so I decided to make him a friend.
Penny: Thank you J.D. and Teddy thanks you too.
Me: You're both welcome Penny. Look on his left arm.
Penny saw a diamond and two mice under it and a message saying "Merry Christmas Penny from the Rescue Aid Society".
Penny: I love it. Thank you. [She hugs me]
Me: You're welcome Penny [I look at a hole in the wall and saw Bernard and Ms. Bianca and winked at them.] Lisa, this is for you.
Lisa opened a small package and it was a ceramic trophy and in it was a 14 karat gold class ring with the insignia for Michigan State University on it and it had an emerald stone.
Lisa: "And the award for the Smartest Person I know goes to Lisa Loud."
Me: I made that trophy in Ceramics Class and I bought that Class ring for you. Your fingers are too small now but you'll grow into it.
Lisa: Once again... [Bursts into tears and sobs again and I comfort her]
Me: Let it out Lisa. Let it all out.
Lisa calms down.
Lisa: Thank you 2nd big brother unit.
Me: You're welcome my little scientist. Last but not least Lily. I have this for you.
Lily opened a small package and it was a ring with the symbol for Gamora on it.
Me: That is a very special ring Lily. It's a back up call ring.
?: It's used to call me.
Out of the shadows came Gamora from Guardians of the Galaxy.
Lincoln: Oh my gosh! Gamora the Most Dangerous Woman in the Universe!
Lily: Wow! You're my favorite Superhero!
Gamora: I'm glad I have some fans. Lily, you can now call me should you get in a tight spot. But only do so when it's like that. Just shine the ring up to the sky and I will arrive.
Lily: I will Gamora. I promise. [Lily puts the ring on her right ring finger and Gamora disappears]
Raven: So the Marvel Superheroes are real?
Me: Yep. I found that ring a long time ago.
Lily got up and hugged me.
Lily: Thank you J.D.
Me: You're welcome kiddo.
Everyone had some presents to give.
Rita: "Well, that's all the Christmas presents. Time to start decorating for Valentine's Day!"
Lori: "Wait! I still have one more!" [shows her giant present she's been waiting to open.] "I saved the best for last!" [shakes it]
Present: "Ow!"
[Everyone looks on awkwardly over what made that noise. Lori opens it up and reveals it to be her boyfriend.]
Bobby: [weary] "Merry Christmas, Babe..."
Lori: [gasps] "Boo-Boo Bear?"
Bobby: "I couldn't find anything good enough to buy you for our first Christmas together, so I decided to give you myself."
Lori: "Ah. That's literally the perfect gift." [hugs him] "Oh, I got you a present, too."
Bobby: "I hope it's food and water."
Varie: Come on Bobby, I'll heal you up.
Bobby: Thanks Varie.
Varie takes Bobby to the couch and Lori sits by him and Varie ran to the kitchen and she brought out a warm turkey leg and some water.
Varie: Here Bobby.
Bobby: Thank you Varie.
Bobby starts eating.
Laney: [Off-screen] Wait! There's something in my stocking! [Laney reaches into her stocking and pulled out a letter and she reads it.]
"Dear Laney, I've been hearing about what's been going on with you and your family. And I am very impressed. What you did was a very nice deed. And I'd like to say thank you for believing in me. I guess there's still a little holiday magic in your house. Even when I'm not there. Never stop believing in yourself.
- Santa Claus"
We were at awe by this letter
Lincoln: Wow, Laney. You got a letter from Santa!
Laney: Not a letter, Lincoln. A reply! I wrote him a letter saying what we did for Mr. Grouse! And by the looks of it, he's very happy!
Lisa: "Indeed, Santa sure was good to us this year."
Louds: "SANTA?!"
Laney: Whatever happened to "There's no such thing as Santa"?
Lola: Yeah. I thought you didn't believe in him."
Lisa: "I didn't until I spied him leaving a present behind the couch last night." [shows a picture of what appears to be Santa labeled "SANTICUS CLAUSIMUS".] "Behold!"
[Everyone gasps at the photo]
Laney: Wow! It really was Santa. He really wrote the letter!
Me: He sure did.
Laney: By the way J.D. how did you meet Santa?
Me: That is an adventure I will never forget. It was 8 years ago today. I was standing outside at midnight when I saw the legendary Polar Express come. The Polar Express is the train ride to the North Pole for kids to meet Santa. I was one of the lucky ones to meet him. I still have my ticket. [I pull out a golden ticket with some marks on it and it was a ticket for the Polar Express]
Everyone: Whoa!
Lori: So the Polar Express is real?
Me: It sure is.
Lincoln: That's incredible!
Jessie: I agree. A train to the North Pole sounds like fun.
Aylene: I think it's really cool.
Jeri: Same here. I've read the book the Polar Express and it was amazing.
Beast Boy: That does sound awesome bro.
Cyborg: Yeah it does.
Me: Trust me. It was. This has been the best Christmas for all of us and the best part of it all was I got to share it with Varie and my very best friends. Merry Christmas everyone!
Everyone hugged me.
Everyone: Merry Christmas J.D!
[The end credits play an instrumental version of That's What Christmas is All About in a snowy field.]
THE END
Another Fanfiction completed.
I've had this one planned ever since Thanksgiving. I love Christmas. It's my favorite time of the year. One of them. I wanted to include some of my relatives in my story. I'm sorry I couldn't write some quotes from them but I wanted it to center around me and my friends. Let me know what you all think. I'm gonna take a little break for a while but have a Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
See you all next time.
Frozen and Tangled mentions belong to Disney Studios and Gamora belongs to Marvel Comics.