"What do you guys think?" asks Tsukishima. His fluffy blonde hair looking the same as did the first time I met him. Sometimes I wonder how he manages to make it look so soft.
"I think it is a great idea," replies Hinata. "I can't speak for this guy here, but I am dying for some independence." Tsukishima looks so relieved.
"Thank you," he replies fixing his frames. He is unable to hide his relief. "I can't stand living on campus."
"That bad?" I ask. I live at home with my parents as does Hinata. We were both talking about becoming roommates, but he wanted a place with space. Neither of us could afford that. Hinata and I both work at the bookstore on campus. The pay is pretty decent, but the perk is we get discounts at every spot on campus. That includes food, drinks, and school supplies. Of course college textbooks isn't discounted. Regardless, as a broke college student any discount is very much welcomed.
"Let's just say some people have poor hygiene," explains Tsukishima frowning. "I don't even want to tell you what I witnessed in the showers." He shudders as I can only imagine. It's one of the reasons I didn't see the perk of living on campus. I could get a single dorm but sharing my bathroom quarters with so many people. That is a no for me. I already don't like people in my business let alone strangers.
"I imagine not good things," replies Hinata. He tucks one of his curls behind his ear. I'm so glad he let his hair grow out again. Our freshmen year he cut his hair wanting to be seen as grown. It's didn't work and he didn't look right at all. "When did Asahi want to do this?"
"By this September," he replies. "We can meet him to take a tour of the house if you want. He has other people looking but would prefer people he knows well to be his roommates."
"I do want a tour," I reply. "I want to know what this place looks like if I am going to call it home."
"Agreed," says Tsukishima drinking some water. "I will let him know so we can get something on the books." Tsukishima phone vibrates causing him to look down. "I have to go."
"That's cool," says Hinata. "Kageyama and I are about to leave anyways." Tsukishima gathers his items.
"That worked out then," he replies. "I'll text you guys." He loads up his bag walking off quickly with his water bottle in hand.
"I wonder what that is about," says Hinata before turning to look at me. I blink trying not to be taken in by him. His orange curls blowing in this April breeze. I hate when that happens. Hinata is my best friend, nothing more.
"Who knows," I reply. "You know how private Tsukishima is." Hinata giggles.
"Won't be so private when we are roommates," he replies packing up his textbooks. "This is such a great opportunity! I need this so bad."
"I get it," I reply packing up my own books. "Did you want to come over to my place tonight?"
"Yes!" he exclaims. Lucky for me my parents are barely home. They are seriously workoholics. They make good money and there is no need for them to work as often as they do but whatever. "I will take it your parents are not there."
"Nope," I reply. "My mom is on some girls trip, while my dad is away on business."
"Why does your mom even need a girl's trip?" asks Hinata standing grabbing his cup half full of strawberry lemonade.
"Hell if I know," I reply. "You bike to school?"
"You know it!" he exclaims.
"Let me get my car and we can load the bike in the back," I explain.
"Coolio," replies Hinata. "Oh, and I want to discuss our opponents over dinner."
"Of course, you do," I reply. "I already got notes." Hinata smirks.
"I expect nothing less," he replies. "I'll meet you at the usual spot." I tend to have the same parking space most of the time. I park in the back where there are less cars. I have an Infiniti that was given to me that use to be my mom's. I am not risking that car getting hit or dinged if I can avoid it. As I walk to the car, I can't help but think about how lucky I am that Hinata and I get to be teammates. For a minute we were close to going to different schools. I was so glad when he changed his mind. I can't imagine playing without him. I get to my car putting my bag in the trunk. I wonder what Hinata will want for dinner. Something tells me he is going to want takeout with his meat buns. I go ahead placing the order as I lean against my car.
I sigh putting my phone back into my jacket pocket. I like being on the volleyball team for our college. It is so different from high school for sure. I want to get to the Olympics but getting on Japan team first is a must. Then we can move from there. The competition is going to be tough. Hinata and I will need to damn near be perfect. We strive for perfection anyway but in this case, it will be mandatory. I glance up to see Hinata riding towards me on his bike. He stops in front of me getting off.
"Man, I think I would be so fat without this bike," he states. I laugh.
"Maybe," I reply. It's hard for me to really know. He is always hiding his frame under baggy clothes. "You could eat a little better."
"I need the fuel!" he exclaims as I pop the trunk. I lower the backseat down sliding his bike inside.
"Meat buns and fast food is not fuel," I drone.
"Says you!" he exclaims.
"Veggies and fruits have plenty of natural fuel," I reply closing the trunk. "I like good food as well as anyone else."
"I do know that," he replies. "You are my partner in crime after all." This makes me smile as I get into the car. Hinata and I talk about the school day as I pick up the food getting to the big home my parents own. I cut off the house alarm heading to the kitchen to put the food down.
"Did you want to shower first?" asks Hinata.
"You can go ahead," I reply. Hinata stays here so often he has clothes here in my room. He knows where everything is. I don't have to show him anything. I get his food and mine plated before heading upstairs. I grab my house clothes that also serve as my sleeping clothes. I prefer to sleep in the nude, but I won't be doing that as Hinata will be sharing my bed with me. I love when he sleeps beside me. My rest is ten times better in the morning. It took a while from Hinata to give up sleeping on the futon. He can be so damn stubborn. I could tell he didn't find the futon comfortable. Took him 3 years but he finally came around. I turn on the TV waiting until it is my turn.
"I swear your water gets so hot," says Hinata walking into my room taking off his robe. He hangs it on the back of my door on a hook. He is wearing his PJ's with the ivory and black strips with a black tee that he is almost swimming in.
"My parents wouldn't have it any other way," I reply pulling my shirt over my head.
"Why are you just undressing?" asks Hinata.
"It's cold in here," I reply. "I'm not trying to catch a spring cold." I walk over to my closet losing the rest of my clothes. I turn around with my robe being tossed in my face. "The fuck!"
"I told you before I don't want to see you naked!" exclaims Hinata.
"We're both men," I reply pulling the robe off my face. I put it on tying it tightly around my waist. "We did this all the time in afterschool activities." Hinata blushes turning away from me.
"That was different," he replies. "You had briefs on." I roll my eyes heading out of the room. I get into the shower trying not to focus on his comment. I don't know why but it bothers me. It's like he is afraid to see me or something. We are best friends for god sake. It shouldn't fucking matter. I know I'm into guys and I have never let it affect the way I see any of my friends.
I discovered that part of myself my 2nd year. I can't lie it was hard to come to terms with. Mostly because I know it is not accepted here in Japan. I don't know how my parents would take it and lastly I don't know how my friends would see me. I haven't found one person that I felt deserving of me in such a way. Plus my gaydar sucks. I have seen some okay guys, but I don't know if they are gay or not. I probably wouldn't have made a move anyway. Volleyball comes first.
I finish up my shower feeling a lot better. I blow dry my hair before making sure my skin has lotion. Smooth, good smelling. I put on my clothes and robe walking out of the bathroom. I get close to my room hearing moaning. I panic recognizing the voice. I open my door to see Hinata frantically at my computer hitting buttons. I can tell he is overwhelmed as he finally manages to exit the video. He breathes a sigh of relief getting up from my desk. He jumps when he sees me. All I can do is stare at him.
"Kage…" he says slowly.
"What happened?" I ask. My cheeks are warm informing me that I am certainly blushing. How can I not. He just came across my fap material. What the hell was he doing on my computer.
"O-oh I just thought I could um," he stammers. He begins to play with the bottom of his shirt. "B-bring up some of our upcoming schools. I didn't mean to…."
"Whatever," I mutter looking down feeling imprudent. I should have closed my windows out in the first place. "Let's just eat." I can't believe this is how the first person I know finds out I'm gay. We don't have to talk about it. Maybe we can act like it never happened. I toss my robe on my dresser not even bothering to hang it up. I just need to get out of this room asap. I jog down the stairs walking into the kitchen. I put my plate in the microwave reheating it for 30 seconds. Hinata walks into the kitchen playing with his fingers.
"Kageyama, can we talk?" he asks.
"About what?" I ask not looking at him. I know what he wants to talk about, but the question is do I want to talk about it. I haven't spoken to anyone about me being gay. I rub my temple as the microwave lets me know my food is ready. Hinata grabs his plate walking over.
"I think you know," he replies as I grab my plate. I sit down at the table as Hinata is now standing where I was. I won't eat until he is sitting at the table with me. It is something I have always done.
"What's to talk about," I reply in agitation. Not mad at him but at how he found out. "I'm gay. No one knows and I want it to stay that way."
"I would never tell anyone," says Hinata softly. "You know I would keep your secret." He is right. I know he would keep my secret without me even having to ask. I stare at him realizing there is something behind his eyes. What is that? He clears his throat grabbing his plate. "That is something you should tell people when you're ready." He sits his plate down across from me sitting down. "We are best friends. I would never tell your secrets."
"Thank you," I reply beginning to eat. I got sesame chicken with rice while Hinata got beef and broccoli along with his meat buns. I wonder where he puts that food at times.
"Um I find it interesting you didn't want me to know," he replies. I glance up at him from my plate.
"Hinata, you can't even handle seeing me naked," I explain trying not to sound annoyed. "Now that you know I am gay it is going to make it worse."
"No, it's not," he defends. "It makes things easier actually." I stare at him as he begins to frown but also appear disappointed.
"You're gay…" I say slowly. Hinata blushes shaking his head no.
"I'm not gay," he replies. "I'm bisexual." He takes a bite of his meat bun covering his eyes blushing. I'm in shock. I don't even know what to say.
"S-Since when?" I stammer.
"Since middle school I guess," he replies with a light shrug. "I never talked about it because well…you know….." I do know. I know very well why he didn't speak on it. How could I not notice? I would have never known Hinata felt that way towards guys. "I didn't know you were um gay. You were really good at hiding it."
"I could say the same about you," I reply. Hinata smiles at me as I smile back. We begin to chuckle before we are full blown laughing. Leave it to him to make me feel better instantly. We start to eat once more.
"So date anyone?" asks Hinata.
"You know damn well I haven't dated anyone," I retort. I have kissed a girl or two, did a little touching but it never felt right. It didn't feel pleasurable to me in any way.
"What about that girl during the summer our 2nd year?" he questions.
"That is when I was beginning to realize I was gay," I reply. "I didn't get far with her. What about you?"
"You know I was focused on the training!" he exclaims. "I didn't have time to focus on getting a girlfriend or a boyfriend."
"Glad to know how committed you are," I reply. We begin to eat with the tension going away. I can't lie. It is nice to be able to talk to someone about men somewhat. Every now and then I want someone to love but I'm terrified at the same time. There is so much to consider. We head back upstairs once the kitchen is back to its spotless form. I put up the leftovers knowing we will eat them tomorrow.
"I'm really excited about moving in with Asahi," he replies pulling back my covers.
"For sure," I reply. "I'm thinking I might get new furniture you know. New world for me."
"Same!" exclaims Hinata as he gets into bed cutting on the TV. I get into the bed beside him.
"You already know what you want don't you?" I inquire. Hinata grins making me laugh. I'm so glad I can rely on him to never change.