The devil within 2

ch.1

Evil Endymion POV

It had been over a month of this facade. Over a month of keeping secrets and lying. All in an effort to protect the fact I was still evil. Still with nega-energy in me. Okay more than just over a month...six weeks now it was. Six weeks of keeping all of this between the generals and I and even Rei as we kept this from those we love, care for, and stood up for us and were on OUR side when we needed them the most.

Six weeks in and instead of confessing as Mamoru wanted to do, I kept my mouth shut and forced him to do the same. He tried once to tell her, to break free and confess but I made sure he'd be unable to and just kept him on as my 'guide' in this till I felt he was ready to come to terms with things. At least that's how the other side of me felt and put it. So here I sat with Usagi on my couch as we watched a movie, a movie whose plot eluded me at the moment as I was focused on not letting on that I was in fact still with my powers.

Usagi was curled up into my side and I felt like nothing could go wrong. Yet there was so much still wrong and the nagging voice of Mamoru was the very one who was telling me how it could all go wrong. The longer I lied the more it would hurt her and our relationship. I knew he had a point. Lies in relationships never went over very well. Very few understanding women would be allowed to keep this type of lie to keep going.

Usagi was one of the few forgiving people to that degree but everyone...even her at their breaking points. I had initially planned to tell her the truth when she recovered from the battle with Metallia but it had passed nearly a month ago. Yet I still refrained from telling her the truth even in the morning when I knew she was strong enough. The few times I tried to, I could only imagine how she'd react.

Anger, sadness and possibly thinking I betrayed her by NOT telling her which wasn't true yet how could I convince her of this when the evidence was right in my face. Any time I looked at her I could see the possibilities that could happen and I, as Mamoru put it, lost my courage and chickened out. The evil though, to which my powers came from expressed its need to stay in place of power inside of me.

It reasoned that I wasn't much of a fighter without the powers I had with me and sadly it was right. I would occasionally look at my hands and know while I was a good combat fighter, and a good sword fighter, traits that I picked up while in the orphanage and on the streets along with my memories of training with Malachite in the past as well as our other brothers which made me grateful.

Yet while I also knew how to use a rose and my 'tuxedo ala smoking bomber' power, that was it. I didn't have a huge connection to my crystal the way Usagi had with hers. My powers were far lesser than hers were at the moment. Don't get me wrong I was proud as hell of her for her achieving her goals and accomplishments BUT even I could recognize how I was feeling and admit to my own faults in this.

It didn't help that my goals were being accomplished via darkness and she was able to do hers without that added help. Yes I helped her train to get her there but in the end her sheer drive and passion is what sealed the deal to do it. You can have the best of the best teaching you but it doesn't guarantee success. Usagi's determination and ability to make that connection happen is what really helped her in the end.

I was just an encouraging force that helped out a little bit. It stung a bit, but I kept it to myself as I knew that I was just doing what I thought was right to do. Mamoru, however, had his own views. You know that the second she finds out about your lies to her it's a wrap...no going back.

I nearly rolled my eyes at his internal proclamation. That's not true. I try to defend myself as I kiss her on the forehead. She snuggles up closer to me.

I can handle the powers in me, maybe YOU can't and that's why I still exist. You need me as I need you. I told him. He responds back...yeah true but we DON'T need the darkness.

I was stewing now and he knew but kept persisting on the matter. He knew which buttons to push and where and when to push them. It was irritating to say the least as we conversed.

Face it at the end of the day you keep it cause your even more inflated ego can't afford to lose it now despite the fact that we'd be even MORE powerful with the usage of the golden crystal yet because you have to work for it, train for it as our Usagi did with hers and didn't outright receive it. You just don't want to take the time to train yourself, to put in the mental and physical discipline to do it.

I was agitated again.

You're feeling your bruised ego and keeping what you have from the darkness, allowing it power and control in certain areas so that you can feel strong and powerful WITHOUT building it up on your own which is what you'd have to do with the golden crystal even though THAT is your birthright and this darkness is a cheat code you're using to NOT bother with the hard work it takes to level up.

I hated that he was right and it didn't help on the video game reference either as it was pretty accurate to say. The darkness told me why I should keep it but I knew Mamoru was right. I didn't want to work for the power of my golden crystal because it would take time. Time that I felt could be put to another use. I took a deep breath to force him back down and away, not wanting to admit to any wrongdoing even though I knew he had made very valid points. It was the feeling of Metallia's energy that popped up.

I noticed it now had a voice to it that I hadn't noticed before, I wasn't sure if this was a good thing that was due to my connection with it for this long now or a bad due to the very same reason. He doesn't know what he's talking about...with the energy provided you're giving yourself the best chance possible to protect those you love.

I internally nodded despite knowing there were some flaws with that logic but I knew I had a better ability to fight now as I was compared to beforehand as just Tuxedo Mask.

Tuxedo Mask was a good fighter but I was a better fighter with my dark powers. I could deal more swift blows and could more easily defeat our enemies with them. Hell, I took out Beryl and she was Queen of the dark kingdom. I managed to get into her inner circle and granted that was also due to her infatuation with me and sure that helped BUT the only thing she loved more than her vision of 'us' was her hunger for power.

I was stronger as I was, yet I could still visually picture Mamoru shaking his head and giving me a disapproving look. However, I could also see Usagi, looking at me with her bright expressive eyes and wanting the best for everyone and to be free of evil. Which circumvented back to the rabbit hole of how my thoughts grew more and darker. On how to keep the powers and keep Usagi to my side.

I know she loves me as I do her BUT I also know what she stands for. Love...justice, punish the evil, strike fear in the hearts of evil at the mere sight of her, and they did. She may not always notice but I've seen it in several monsters we've come across. They quaked at the sight of her. They did reformulate battle plans and re-strategize once she came onto the scene making their escape that much harder.

Yet I was this exception to the rule because the evil was in me, I was the evil and she STILL loved me. Despite it. I wanted to tell her the truth so I could convince her that me staying this way was better for us both. That I could protect us better if I was, yet that gut feeling always hit me, the one that told me HOW'D she'd react. How she actually and really react to how I wanted her to react or how I wished she would.

How she'd respond to being deceived all this time. Especially after she went to bat for me and the generals. Took crap from Luna and Rei for a period of time and even sided with me when Luna tried to kill me. Though that was more for obvious reasons. I pulled her closer to me as I thought about how I had been keeping my still being evil at bay and away from her. It hadn't been easy, not even a little bit.

Especially when I had to make the projection equipment 'disappear' since it was created by my 'evil self' and therefore should be gone when 'he' was gone. I had to deal with her not being able to be over as much but she would still make time for us to get together. She'd have the girls lie to her parents for her on certain nights when the usual excuses wouldn't cut it. Especially on the school nights when her dad in particular would do checks.

I guess she'd made a few too many excuses and nearly got caught. It had been a stroke of both bad and good luck. I had snuck out just in time and HE checked on her seconds later as she was still in bed. She had feigned sleep but knew it was a close call and I have a feeling he knew SOMETHING was up as he started to do that more often. Maybe he heard how uneven her breathing was, especially since we'd JUST had sex.

Maybe he smelled something in the air and knew SOMETHING was off but didn't know what that something was. Either way he did it more often and while Ikuko from my understanding, got tired of waiting for him to come back to bed and fell asleep waiting she let it go as he was 'Kenji' being Kenji and being an overprotective father. Besides, according to Usagi, Shingo had also had a friend over.

A female friend that she helped cover for on occasion. I do recall a time that makes me to this day both feel grateful and laugh when we were playing a game of 'musical rooms'. Kenji swore he heard muffled noises from both rooms. Both Shingo and her had mutually in their own sibling way, agreed to help cover for the other in order to use the cover to hide their own 'extra sleep over partner'.

That night had nearly made me laugh as at one point when Shingo pretended to do his prayers both Mika, his 'friend' and I hid under his bed once I remembered that I had to sneak out the old-fashioned way when Kenji went to check on Usagi's room first. After ducking behind the door I had nearly vanished but remembered that I couldn't unless Usagi were to find out, and slipped out the open door till I heard him leave.

I slipped into Shingo's room a couple of doors down. Stunned at the sight of me yet recalling WHO I was, I gave him the prompt warning of Kenji's bed checks as both Mika and I, who had been with him, scrambled under the bed. Kenji was confronted by a very irate Usagi who acted even more upset at her sleep being woken up. What helped even less when that happened, hormones, as she was on her cycle.

It was the only time she let me go without a condom though I knew she was on birth control so she was still covered. She only relented once I explained to her the odds of actually getting pregnant. Though a pregnant Usagi would be a sight to see and something that I would enjoy though considering her still in high status I doubt she would. Teenagers were mean in school and I didn't want her to go through that.

Anyways Shingo jumped in her defense as she did this for waking them both up on a school night. With both of them working in sync, something that effectively backed their dad into a corner, Kenji agreed to lower it down but still did it at least twice a week and not the four times he was doing it. That was at least somewhat of a win but still made it hard to see her several times a week.

Especially in the middle of the week when the girls would be cramming for tests. So Usagi put in a new system with the girls that she would come over to the temple to study and tell her parents that she'd be there the night and call to check in on them at Rei's temple at 8 pm before heading out to my place giving it a five minute grace period in case they called back for anything in nature like to make sure she was actually there.

Something that her parents did do sometimes, mostly her dad though when she asked Shingo about it he rarely received the calls to double check. She wondered if it was due to him being a guy and her a girl, or the fact that she had been doing this for MUCH longer than he had and their parents were becoming suspect or...both. The other reason for this, the lack of attacks, had people getting worried that something bigger was coming again.

Especially when word that the north pole had had a huge eruption that had created a deep ass crater. The one that we caused by destroying the nega-verse. I still remember that week so easily. People talked about it so much I was tempted to go back up there and investigate it further but apparently those closest to it sent in excavation teams to 'figure it out'. Usagi and the others worried for a moment about this.

So when that week came by and when they couldn't find any actual fragments of anything, courtesy of the silver crystal and the blast destroying EVERYTHING that was remotely related to the dark kingdom or my former kingdom which was obviously a good thing as NO ONE could afford that just yet, they came up with their only logical explanation, the only thing they could come up with.

I remember the new that day as the reporter interviewed the 'seismologist' and she said 'This happened due to shifting craters that moved due to a small 'shockwave' that happens every so often as the world is created with them all around and the 'tectonic plates' and hit a hidden cavern as they were 'everywhere in the remote areas' and the air pocket that was discovered created a 'rupture' that created an even bigger explosion which resulted in what we have now.' I remember Ami's face on that one.

Her's was a mix of 'THAT'S the explanation?!' and 'sad as it is I hope people believe her.' I remember asking her about it as she remarked at the time "As much as I always hold out hope for the intellectual community so that we can still advance as one, this logic while having merit, with people actually believing it just makes me wonder how deeply unintelligent some people are and that saddens me as I want us all to at least utilize common sense, yet at the same time I'm more than glad that they do believe it."

I nod at her explanation. As an academic myself I feel her pain on that so I explained to her that day, "People wouldn't be ready to know or accept the truth about what happened up there truly for a while to come. To know WHO was up there and what that meant for the history of this world that was buried so long ago, it would call so much into question right now. Things are too fragile at the moment so for them to grasp it would be like rocking the boat before they're ready to hear it."

She nodded her head and accepted this before remarking 'I guess it just sometimes bothers me.'

To which I told her, "Honestly dealing with someone who can't grasp things that are the simplest to grasp make my head hurt at how 'dumb' they can be or how lacking in common sense they are."

I realized that I sounded a bit mean on that one as I saw the expression on her face and to avoid any suspicion, I told her "Joking.''

Once more she accepted it as we moved on. That was when I knew I had to be more careful on how much I spoke about certain things. Sometimes the evil would breach out and try to dominate the conversation with others and if I was to maintain that I was back to being 'me' again I needed to keep that secret. However, with Mamoru hounding me whenever he could it was becoming harder and harder.

Like an annoying jiminy cricket or something. Before I could put much more thought into it I was hit with a wave of passion as Usagi slipped her hand down the front of my pants and began to caress me through them. She still had her eyes on the screen of the T.V. yet her motions were very precise and erotic to say the least. Her time spent with me as my evil self granted her a more bold look on our sex life.

She was still shy on certain things but she definitely did initiate things more than I would have given her credit for beforehand. It was exhilarating to say the least to have her be spontaneous as she was right now while there were still times when she had that shy sweetness to her that made me feel like I could pull it from her and try something new. This being one of the few times where she was bold.

Especially when she unzipped me from my jeans. I lost focus of the movie all together now as she pulled my now hard under her hot hold shaft and lowered her head down to pull him deeply into her mouth. I felt like slowly dying a lovely death. It was rare to get this from her as some women, either via culture, how they were raised or personal preferences depending, found this particular act, regardless if married or engaged or not, to be degrading and refused to do it. I never pressed Usagi for it.

It didn't however mean that I didn't WANT it. As I did...oh I so did. I began sinking into the couch, enjoying her little tongue wrapping around my lower head as I tried hard NOT to make a sound. Part of me, even the evil part, was scared that if I so much as croaked out a sound she'd stop. It was an irrational fear but it was still there. So when she began to pull up out of pure instinct I placed my hand on her head.

Usagi POV

I could feel his fingers threading through my hair, the sensation only adding to my pleasure as I added to his own. I didn't do this too often as even after all of our time together I still felt a bit inexperienced in this department. So I liked to experiment when I could. When I found the boldness to do so. Right now, as I peeked up at his face, I could see the restraint he was showing in NOT doing what I'd seen being done in the porn that I'd watched.

Yes I watched porn. It was something Minako suggested to help give me some insight on what guys would look at or watch. While some of it was a bit gross, like the guys wanting the girls to call them 'daddy' or 'master.' I mean seriously what was up with that? Or my least favorite part when I saw the guy spitting between her legs. It made me realize how lucky I was to have Mamoru with me.

He got me naturally so wet that there was no spitting involved. Sure he would lick me till I came hard BUT he never performed some of those acts yet even Minako told me that 'a guy does still enjoy a good blow job'. So taking a cue from a few of those videos I went ahead and picked up a few tips and tricks before turning to cosmo for more and found myself able to use the combination of both to learn from.

Yes, I had already done some of this stuff but I didn't want Mamoru to think that I didn't understand or get that he had needs too. So whenever I got the willpower to do it, I went ahead and acted on that part of me that was wanting to. I did this one through the movie so that he wouldn't see it coming AND with the movie as background noise, I could use it to distract me from getting potentially embarrassed.

I do this and earn his approval when I feel his hand in my hair. I can't help but smile just a little bit as I angle my head up to see him. The look on his face is that of agonizing pleasure at its finest. I take a bit of feminine pride in my ability to do this as he tries to maintain his self-control and NOT react to much. Trying his best to not pressure me. Even when I slide my tongue down his shaft and wrap it around.

His head falls back against the couch as I hit the head again and lap at it making his other hand grip at the couch. He definitely wants to take this further but is refusing to push me into anything till I say I'm good for it. It's that indomitable will that makes me love him and trust him all the more as I ask him, "Would you like me to go on?" He sees me teasing him with my tongue darting out and licking the bobbing head.

I could taste the pre-cum that was slipping out and I swore it damn near destroyed his self-control to make this last. I could see the expressions changing on his face. A variety of emotions that ranged from passion, lust, love...trying in vain to control himself from losing said control. I just hoped I was conveying both the lust and love I was feeling as I heard him actually whimper for more.

I could see it in him that he wanted this. He wanted me to suck him off till he came down my throat. Yet I also saw the determination to have something MORE than just my mouth on him. I saw his need to jam himself into my tight heat and while my mouth was good...oh so good as I could feel him getting bigger and longer, and he would easily cum down my throat, I knew that he got more satisfaction out of being in my tight sheath as I did.

With that being clearly communicated via body language I stopped and leaned upward, undoing the rest of his belt as I pulled it off of him and got up from the couch. I licked and nibbled on his neck and seductively instructed him, "Come to bed." And without giving him a moment to overthink it I began to walk towards his bedroom. Well, the bed WE had been sharing for months now, the very bed that he was insisting was OURS now.

I turn around and in the sexiest manner I can make happen I slip my jeans, the short ones that have very little weight to them down as I reveal my lacy boy shorts that are higher up on my butt than normal ones are. Well okay maybe cheeky boy shorts. Either way I saw the way his eyes begin to bug out at the sight as he begins to scramble to follow me, nearly forgetting about the fact that his own pants are around his hips.

He hits the coffee table a bit before looking back up at me as I toss the jeans shorts his way. He tries to catch them before tossing them aside and sees me lifting my shirt up enough to show that I didn't wear a bra this evening. It was risky but I wanted to be more brazen tonight…and I have a few over at his place anyways. He sees my perked-out nipples as I gently graze my hands over them, eliciting light moans from myself.

"The panties only come off when YOU take them off," I tell him without fail and go past his bedroom door. He doesn't take long before he's right behind me, giving me a soul searing kiss before tossing me up onto the bed and grabbing, nearly ripping my panties off.

"Careful those are from Vicky S." I giggle in playful protest while he merely hungrily proclaims, "Don't care, I'll buy you new ones."

I'm already mentally picturing which ones I could get but my thoughts become jumbled when I'm flat on my back and he's got himself square between my legs. His head bent over as his tongue darted out licking and carving out the taste of myself on his tongue. He makes motions that only he ever could. I don't know if it's a good thing or bad that Evil Endymion was in Mamoru for as long as he was, but I'm inclined to go with good.

Mamoru is much bolder than he used to be. Endymion in the past from what I remember was more expressive and bolder in his pursuit of me and of all things us. He didn't let anyone get in the way of us, not even Beryl's attempts at seduction. I was all he saw and it was empowering that I had that kind of hold over him since he certainly had a hold over me…still does. Now that Mamoru and Endymion were fully one as Serenity and I were, our relationship had taken to new levels of not just sex but of love and trust.

I saw it in not just his actions towards me but of his towards the girls and even his guards towards the girls and myself. There was a level of respect that couldn't be ignored. I knew that with our previous enemy down, with ALL of us together, there was no new enemy we couldn't beat. I will admit there were a few moments from time to time Mamoru's words made me wonder if the evil in him had affected him on a personality level, but I think that was really more or less of his blunt, cathartic personality.

Mamoru wanted to protect others, just as we all did, yet you can't make someone listen to reason if they don't want to. Beryl learned that the hard way. Well we all did. So as my prince had his tongue doing wicked things between my legs, I let them open wider. Enjoying the bounty of his lips sucking at my lower ones as I whimpered and gripped at the bed sheets from the feelings being evoked from the simple task.

I lifted my head from the bed, not even by the pillows as it was a king-sized bed and we were towards the center, and admired his whole head twisting to the side and flick at my clit with his tongue and watching my face for my reaction. His eyes were nearly burning into my own, enjoying the sight of me experiencing the pleasure. When he sucked on my clit then jammed his tongue into my core, I tried to pull him in closer.

This was of course effective as he was as close as one could be to another.

I smiled as he pulled his head up and asked, "What is so funny?"

"I want you closer, but you can't get any closer with what you're currently doing."

I give a small chuckle as he rubs his fingers over my clit once more, almost making it too sensitive. "Oh no…?"

As if he's doubtful of my words, "Then allow me to remedy that."

I have no time to even THINK about what he means by that till lifts himself up and pushes himself into me. I cry out from the pleasure and force of his member with me. I didn't even know when he had removed the rest of his clothes but he sure as hell did and holy hell seeing him naked was never not going to make me feel like I was with a damned Adonis. Our time spent training really helped out a LOT.

He was always good looking and fit but with his arms bulging from holding the rest of himself above me as his seemingly giant length was gliding into me with a slow accuracy as if daring me to say we weren't close now. In fact the pace was damn near agonizingly slow. I looked up and saw the expression on his face. The heat, the love, the passion…all aimed at me as he pushed my knees towards his shoulders.

He lifted himself slightly up higher and then over me, like an imposing towering figurehead. To many he could be seen as a massive dominant figure, for me he was my prince, my love, my knight and I was his princess and he loved me as I loved him. I was the only one granted access to see how much this man cared and loved. How much he used to hurt and still sometimes hurt from the demons of the past.

I sometimes felt it in the way he moved, like he was afraid he'd hurt me. Like right now, as much as I enjoyed the slow pace, the passion in us both burned brightly. We both needed more than what this was for too much longer. I reached down and grabbed his rear. Encouraging him to pump harder and faster into me. He grunted and lurched forward, pressing me further up on the bed, intentional or not I cried out from the impact.

It felt amazing to have him within me like this. To hold him close as his cock kept applying the right pressures to my body. The way he moved inside of me and touched every muscle within, reveled in how my walls caressed his length as he pushed up against them on repeat. Our sounds becoming music to each other's ears, listening for the other to keep the tempo up as we strove to reach for those blissful moments of pleasure.

I looked up at him and saw his darkening eyes, the midnight blue that sometimes still looked nearly black in the right shade of darkness. They were full of love for me as his length pulsed and pushed into me. Making me feel things only he could make me feel. I clung to him as he clung to me, as if he knew and felt it that we needed to feel as close as we were, to feel how far we'd come from all of it.

He sunk his head down and kissed lovingly at my neck all the while his member was grinding into me on repeat slowly over and over again as I cried out, his pace steadily increasing till I was nearly screaming out for more. My wails of pleasure were loud as his roars of ecstasy were louder as we both started to climb on the mountain of pleasure even faster than before. He sat up and looked down.

I watched him watch us for a few moments as he twisted and craned his neck, "Kami...Usa..." I clamped down and ground out to him, "Mamo..."

For a moment something flickered in his eyes. I couldn't place it initially so when he leaned forward and began to jam himself into me over and over again I screamed out. My head fell back and my body bounced up and down on the bed till I felt my orgasm hit me.

It was so sudden that I didn't have much time to even think let alone do anything other than take it as he plowed into me with reckless abandon. Our bodies in sync as his cock spewed his seed into me at a record worth rate. So much so I could even feel it seeping out of me and making a mess of his bed sheets. Not that he ever seemed to care, he saw it as proof of our love. It made me smile whenever he said that.

Right after our love making as we settle on the sheets together, I fantasize what our lives could be like when I graduate from high school.

"What are you thinking so deeply about?" He asks me as I tell him, "The future...as strange as it is I've decided I want to be a school teacher, but for like grade school. Not high school, junior high or pre-school. That nice in-between."

He smiles at me.

"Sounds like it suits you',' he expresses. "The teacher and the doctor, I like the sound of that."

I resettle myself on his chest. "How are your classes going for that?" I ask him, genuinely hoping that being a double agent didn't harm his chances of graduation.

He smiles, "Well thanks to having you being my anchor in this world I was able to keep up with my studies and make sure that I didn't lose any time."

I smile at his words. That's a relief. "I was afraid that your essential work with us and playing your part for Beryl was taking you away from your goals, your dreams."

He looked down to me, "Don't get me wrong I can see where the concern is but thanks in part to you, I was able to prevent that aspect of my life from falling through the cracks."

I blushed but didn't say much till he pressed further and made me look at him.

"What?" he asked.

I sighed, "At one point I was really worried about you, like how'd you slip back into your old life here when you were busy doing double agent work. It's a lot to ask of one person and you did it without being asked and barely got anything other than treated poorly for it by several people."

He looks me in the eyes knowing who I meant to say. Luna had been the worst contender. Rei was hard on him too but seemed to ease up on him over time whereas Luna stuck to her guns and caused the most damage. It still hurt that she'd done that.

Sometimes Ami would talk to me in school about how Luna did wrong but she did it with love in her heart for us all. I know Ami, like me, tries to see the good in everyone, but there are times when people's own pride and ego get in the way of what truly is done out of love and what's done out of their own selfish desires to be right all the time.

Ami accepted this and I think even now wonders how accurately it portrays Luna and which side of the spectrum she laid on or lays on. I'm now wondering about it myself with her punishment still being in effect.

"I didn't want special treatment, Usa…," Mamoru says, pulling me out of my thoughts.

"I know but you should have been treated better is what I'm saying. You didn't deserve all of it," I tell him.

He quirks up his brows at that, "What I mean is initially at first I could understand the hesitation and having one's guard up, but once I realized that you were still you, and had retained that part of you that made you, you, that hesitation and guard go away. I knew I could trust you and your word. I think it's why people became divided after a while. Others saw what some didn't..." I explained as he replied, "Or refused to."

I looked at him as he met my eyes with his own equally serious ones.

"Luna was going to see what she wanted to see. She was working off of her own blind gut and her gut read that I was nega-powered up and saw nothing else. Her own training blinded her to the good that could be done. Hell, maybe even her ego."

"It's like you read my thoughts sometimes," I told him as he gave a small smile.

"Point is I wanted you and our home, our world, the people in it to be safe. It wasn't going to happen with Beryl here. I think even the evil knew she was too power hungry to rule properly."

He got this look in his eyes. Almost like he was reflecting on a memory or something. In these moments he looked like his evil Endymion self. Like the evil never left him.

"Power maybe power, but one still has to know when to and when not to use it," he muttered as I saw those traces getting a little bit darker.

Sometimes I briefly wonder IF I had failed that day to rid him of the evil from Metallia's powers and the hold it had on him. Especially with some of his responses and a few choices here and there. I mean it wasn't anything ridiculous but sometimes his actions were much more 'evil Endymion' than they were of Mamoru, but then I remember that Rei affirmed it. This is just the aftermath of having evil in him.

There will obviously be some reflective changes in thoughts, and maybe even decisions made. I had even read up on a history book that spoke about men and women that had played the double agent role before. How they seemed 'different' afterwards. Being in that position would change a person and Mamoru was definitely different from it. I usually wondered the most whenever his eyes would darken just a bit more than usual.

I waved it off mentally as I nod at his words. "Anyways back to the original point here, I kept up with my studies and even took some tests online, those that I could. Prince of earth or not I want to be a good doctor, I want to protect people."

I nod again, "Me too, it'll just be in different ways that's all."

He nods. "Exactly, and with you by my side we can accomplish anything."

I blush again taking the encouragement in as I tell him, "Always and forever."

"I'm just glad that you were able to make it happen, you've done so much for yourself in such a short amount of time. I'm proud of you Mamoru..."

He bends his head down a bit as I pull his face back up.

"Hey I am. Everything you are is inspiring. I'm only glad that you've let me be a part of it." I tell him, knowing that sometimes he really doesn't give himself enough credit and needs to know that he has done a lot already.

He takes my hands in his and re-arranges us both to look at me, like there's a part of him that is trying to get really in depth with me. I can feel us hitting a turning point within our relationship. "Usa...at the end of the day while you are my girlfriend, you're also my future wife, my world..."

His voice choked up a bit on his words as I tried to talk yet couldn't. My throat was closing up on the emotions going through me.

"My reason for still having a dream, goals to begin with. You are my everything, and someday the mother of our kids..."

His hand grazed my stomach and I swore...I swore I felt my heart skip a beat and my stomach do a flip. My center suddenly ached a bit and pulsed. I know I'm too young for kids just yet but knowing that after everything that we've already been through together, the struggles all of it, that he sees me as mother material and can see me as his wife already...it makes me happy.

Not that it wasn't already going to happen, but there's a difference to knowing someone was 'betrothed' to you versus knowing that they 'want' to be with you and NOT out of some past history. I wanted Mamoru and I to be strong and in love because WE want to be, not because our pasts dictate it. So seeing the expression on his face, seeing how serious he is, I suddenly feel that juvenile young teen morph into what I'm feeling now.

A confidently growing young woman who has helped to save the world and wants to enjoy the few moments of peace that we have before something happens to change it. I know he and the others want it to. We all want a bit of peace to be here for a while as these days it isn't known to last.

"Don't short-change your involvement in this. I owe you just as much as many others do," I nod and give him a kiss.

I didn't want to argue the point, especially since he was as stubborn as I was. "Don't forget that you've gone and done some incredible things too," he tells me.

"We all have."

He kisses the top of my head. "Yeah but you've done the most. I owe you…my life."

His last words were a whisper as he nearly crushed me to him. Holding me more tightly to him as I grip on tighter to, as his tone sobers up the atmosphere.

Despite his words sometimes I still get that nagging feeling that my gut can't ignore. I decide to read that book some more and maybe even a psychology book that has the same undertones so I can understand him better. After all, my gut is rarely wrong and when it's right, it usually brings about conflict that I wish was more controlled. So we lay like that for a while till we eventually drift off to sleep, still in a deep embrace.