"If you so much as breathe too close to that grill, I'm going to kick your ass into next week!" Lucy's voice halted Natsu in his tracks as he crept closer to said grill.
"But Lucy," he whined back. "My dad gave it to me for my birthday. I should be the one to use it."
Lucy stepped onto the porch with a plate of meat in her left hand and a spatula in the right. "And you have proven yourself untrustworthy when it comes to cooking with fire. You're allowed to keep me company, but no grilling for you." A quick flick of her wrist brought the flat of the spatula down on his hand which was reaching towards the lighter fluid. "And stop trying to add lighter fluid!"
The first time was his first day off after his birthday. His dad had set it up without him knowing. When Lucy found out about it, she decided to surprise him for its inaugural lighting, purchasing several premade sides from a local deli, and two beautiful steaks from a butcher she knew of nearby. It was supposed to be a quiet, romantic dinner. Instead it was two perfect, beautiful steaks which Natsu turned into charcoal that evening. At least there was a good pizza place around the corner.
Around a month later, they tried again. It was just supposed to be a small party with their friends at his apartment, and Natsu was in charge of the burgers and dogs. When it became apparent that the burgers would not be as 'flame kissed' as Natsu wanted them, he added what he deemed a sufficient amount of lighter fluid. At least the fire department had been prompt in arriving and no one was injured.
"But… fire."
"How you ended up a police officer and not an arsonist, I will never know." Lucy sighed as she opened the lid and placed the steaks on the grill plate, then closed the lid again. As soon as she was done Natsu's arms wrapped around her waist and Lucy found herself pulled back against his chest with his chin resting on her shoulder.
"You know you prefer me this way." He pressed a soft kiss against her neck.
Lucy tilted her head away, giving him better access to her skin and allowing him to distract her for a few moments. "Are you sure? Maybe I'd like someone more predictable; maybe I would prefer it if you had a more steady routine."
"If that's what you wanted, you would have stayed with that creepy ex of yours and never even given me the time of day. Besides, what's more predictable than me trying to light something on fire?"
The passion and joy of his ridiculous words brought a laugh from Lucy that shook her so thoroughly she grasped Natsu's forearms to keep from losing her balance - not that he would have let her fall. Her laughter had, of course, been the goal. In the few months they had been together, Natsu's two favorite things to do were making Lucy either laugh or blush; since it was much easier to make her flustered, it always felt like a bigger win to get a genuine laugh out of his girlfriend.
"Both excellent points," she conceded once she was able to get her breathing back under control.
Taking a moment, she glanced at the time and tried to step out of Natsu's arms so she could turn the steaks. Instead of releasing her, he tightened his grip. She tried again and again to no avail, even getting a petulant no when she tried asking nicely to be released.
"Natsu, please let go. I just want to turn the steaks and then I'll be right back in your arms."
"Nah, I'm good where I am."
"One more chance to let go before I fight dirty…"
For just a moment he hesitated, allowing his mind to wander to the ways he thought she would fight dirty, each more appealing than the last. With that settled, he took a step away from the grill, Lucy still his unwilling captive.
"If you don't want to let me go, that's fine. Just remember that it was your idea to celebrate the anniversary of me moving to Magnolia, and you promised we could celebrate however I wanted to." She waited for his confirmation nod before continuing. "So, this was my choice - what I want - and if you don't let me have what I want, my lips will never voluntarily touch you again."
Natsu had always been one to run a little hot, but in that particular moment every little bit of heat in his body left him. Ice ran through his veins at Lucy's flippant threat. Never had he let her out of his arms as quickly as he did that second, nearly tripping over the bag of charcoal in order to give her enough space to work.
One small part of him thought that she might be serious. That tendril of doubt was all it took for his mind to question every aspect of their relationship. He was at least moderately certain things were going well. They met a little over four months ago on her birthday and had begun dating soon after. Yeah, he could be cocky and confident, but he didn't think he was ever pushy - not in the ways that would matter.
Or… was he? His mind wandered to their first kiss, their first date, their first time together, and was at least mostly sure she had wanted each of those as much as he had. At least there was no question of the first kiss, since she had literally asked for him to kiss her for her birthday. But the rest was now up in the air. Was she looking for a way out of the relationship without blatantly stating that she wanted to break up? Fuck, he just didn't know anymore.
While Natsu busily pondered over whether or not his girlfriend was even willingly in their relationship, Lucy obliviously flipped the steaks and added a few more charcoal briquettes to the fire to keep the temperature steady. Her tasks took almost no time, and she was fully prepared to be whisked back into Natsu's arms as soon as she turned around. Instead, she found her boyfriend looking contemplative in a way she did not often see; a look which set off every warning alarm in her head.
"Natsu?" Lucy reached out, but Natsu stepped back slightly. There was not much room on his little patio, and the shift away told her that something was wrong and touching was currently off the menu. "Did I do something wrong?"
"It's not what you did, it's what you said," he told her honestly, pausing to give her time to work out the problem on her own.
Try as she might, she could not figure out what had turned his mood so sour so quickly. He scoffed at her when she told him as much.
"Are you looking for an out?"
"Am I… What?"
"Are you still interested in this relationship at all?" He asked bluntly. "Am I just a convenient companion for you until you find someone better?"
"WHAT?!" Lucy could not believe what she was hearing. Where the hell was this even coming from?
"I'm not really interested in a friends with benefits arrangement, and if you're not invested in this relationship, I deserve to know."
A fire Lucy had never seen directed at her burned in Natsu's eyes. He was serious about this, and she had absolutely no idea how these ridiculous thoughts got into his head in the first place.
"Why would you think that I was just using you for sex? I am as invested in our relationship as you are, Natsu. Where the fuck is this even coming from?"
"I'm not the one threatening to withhold affection over the potential of burning fucking dinner, Lucy! What the fuck am I supposed to think when a pair of fucking steaks are more important to you than I am?" He was in her face, holding onto his temper just enough not to be yelling at her, but it was close. All of the hurt that had chilled him to the core was being fed into his anger, burning hotter and hotter as it slowly turned into rage.
"I'm not… that's not what… you didn't think I would seriously do that do you?" Natsu's eye twitched slightly as he just stared, waiting for any explanation for her words. Lucy had yet to say anything that would convince him that he was wrong in his assessment. "It was just a joke!"
A joke? All of the fire left him in an instant. What replaced the fire and heat was cold, but not like ice. It was the cold of a vast emptiness. "Your joke wasn't funny." The cold inside him was effectively conveyed to his girlfriend, leaving her in shocked silence as he turned and went back into his apartment, slamming the door closed with enough force to rattle the building.
Seconds passed, and she almost went after him, but rushing into his home would not solve anything, so she sat down and thought through why she had said what she did. The smell of steaks cooking attempted to permeate her concentration, but it went ignored. The scent in the air had turned from perfect to overcooked to burned before Lucy finally had her shit together enough to head inside.
She did not expect Natsu to be sitting on his couch drinking a beer when she came in. If she were honest with herself, she had not expected him to still be home at all and counted herself lucky that he was. They had had several arguments before, but nothing like this. It highlighted for her just how little she had shared about her past; a mistake she was determined to correct.
He didn't look at her as she slid the glass door closed after stepping inside. The only reason she even knew he was aware of her presence was the subtle clenching of his jaw and the way the knuckles on his right hand turned white as his grip tightened around the bottle.
"I fucked up," Lucy began. Natsu took a moment to glance her way before taking a swig of beer and turning back towards the television. That was more acknowledgement than she had expected, so she pressed on. "I thought about it, and I know where that comment came from. It's one I've heard in a variety of forms too many times before, and it happened nearly every time I did something that Dan decided was wrong."
Natsu's attention was focused on Lucy before she even finished the statement.
"I'm not trying to make excuses, just trying to explain where I got the idea that saying shit like that was normal. It hurt every time that bastard pulled that on me, and then I just turned around and did the same damn thing to you." Lucy could feel her throat constricting. She knew she was running out of time, and it would be wholly unfair of her to break down and cry when she was the abuser in this situation instead of the victim. "He would always tell me it was a joke once I had 'corrected' whatever he didn't like.
"I don't want to be that person, Natsu. I don't expect forgiveness, and I won't ask for it. I just wanted to let you know that I'm sorry." The burning in her eyes let Lucy know her time was up; the dam broke and tears welled up in her eyes, spilling over to leave hot trails down her cheeks. "I'm so sorry. Hurting you is the last thing I ever wanted to do. You're so good to me and so fun and I love being with you. So much. I spent so many years being manipulated that I did the same fucking thing to you."
Natsu watched her fall apart. He kicked himself for not knowing any of this. True, she never said anything, but he could have asked, instead allowing himself to become completely wrapped up in the comfortable little world they had built when they were together. He knew as soon as her tears began that their perfect little bubble had popped, and what he had left of it was the beautifully flawed woman standing in his living room baring her soul to him. There was no way to know if she would mess up like this again, but Natsu knew that she would do her damndest not to.
It was obvious that neither wanted to let their story end here; not when there were still so many adventures waiting for them to have together. And he had decided to tell her just that when he realized she was no longer standing by the back porch. Looking around frantically, he saw her making her way towards his front door. Some small part of Natsu let him know that he needed to stop her before it was too late, so he did the only thing he could think of. The glass of his beer bottle shattered on the floor as he dropped it and vaulted over the couch.
Lucy flinched, turning towards the sound just in time to be pulled into Natsu's arms once more.
"Please don't go," he whispered in her ear. "I don't know if I ever will be, but I know I'm not ready to lose you yet."
She returned his fierce grip, burying her face against his shoulder. "I'll just end up hurting you again." Lucy choked back a sob. "I don't ever want to hurt you."
"I know, but look at it this way…" He pulled away just enough to look into her eyes. "We got our first fight out of the way, right?" Lucy nodded. "So, honeymoon phase is over, but I think that's a good thing. Now we will be able to see all the little flaws about each other that we didn't notice before."
"Flaws kill relationships," Lucy replied as if conditioned to do so. She blanched as soon as the words left her mouth.
"Is that also a Dan-ism?"
"Yeah. He would list some things he considered flaws in my looks or personality or the way I dress and then say that if I didn't address them I would be responsible for killing our relationship."
"Shit. I think I shoulda let you get in a few good kicks on your birthday, fuckin' bastard woulda deserved every single one of 'em."
A soft, wet chuckle slipped out before Lucy could catch it. The sound of it brought a relieved smile to Natsu's lips.
"You okay now?" Lucy nodded. "Are we okay?"
"Yeah, we're okay."
"And, most importantly…are the steaks okay?"
"I'm afraid I sacrificed our steaks to the fire in order to save our relationship." She braced herself for some sort of outburst; maybe a lecture, possibly more yelling. Lucy had not expected Natsu's entire being to shake with laughter.
"A fitting end to the fight steaks if you ask me. But now we have no food. You have condemned us both to the horrible fate that is starvation. I can feel myself wasting away as we speak…"
Natsu draped himself dramatically over Lucy and they both stumbled, giggling as they fought to stay upright.
"You're such a ridiculous baby. How about we order pizza and watch bad movies tonight?"
In no time they were settled on the couch. Natsu had cleaned up the broken glass while Lucy ordered their food.
"I almost forgot," Natsu said as Lucy leaned against him. "I would like some sort of proof that you do not intend to follow through with your heinous threat." He tapped his cheek to indicate the proof he was looking for.
After pulling back from the kiss she left exactly where it was requested, Lucy sat up to get a little closer. "Don't worry, there are more where that came from…"
When the pizza arrived almost an hour later, many more kisses had been shared, and Natsu had to remember how to put on his pants before answering the door.