Chapter Twenty-Eight: The Final Plan

Audrey was so concerned last night that she didn't leave him. She fell asleep besides him. She woke up the following morning, immediately turning to the side to find him still there and asleep. Which was a relief as she forced herself from the bed, went straight to the bathroom and took out the tablets. Moving to her own bedroom and hiding them in her chest of drawers. She remained in her bedroom for quite some time. Stephen must have woken up hours after her as she heard him moving around while downstairs. She had already made herself a cup of tea and was sat in the living room. When she heard the sound of him going to the bathroom, opening the cabinet door and rooting through it. Audrey was alarmed to hear him suddenly banging and the sounds of things being thrown around the bathroom. He wasn't well! He clearly noticed the tablets have been removed and was ransacking the entire bathroom, not caring about whether it was tidy. He seemed to have regressed back to his teenage rages. The ones Malcolm sometimes spoke about but she found it difficult to imagine. Now she can hear it plain as day and it made her go back to those days of sobbing over those confusing letters.

He's in a bad way, Audrey. I had to smack him around the face and I never had to do that before, I would never have done that before. Though the lad is besides him with grief and anger. I've no idea why he's been angry since he was a child, me and Joyce always dealt with his temper but without her words, he hasn't got anything calming. His mind must be muddled. He smashed up my bedroom today, saying it reminds him too much of his mother. I smacked him for doing it and told him he can't do that, it's not the way a lad his age should cope. So he only smacked me back and smashed up the old photograph in the frame. I chucked him out and he roamed the street for goodness knows how long. Came back with bruised knuckles, said he only hit a wall. I think he must have done because he hasn't got bruises anywhere else. Sorry, Aud. You must think him awful and me too. Though he's not a bad lad most of the time, he's in the anger stage and so am I. He did say sorry to me and I said I was sorry back. I think he cried for the first time tonight in his room when he thought I was dead to the world.

"Where did you put it? I just know want to know where you put it...Please, mom!" Stephen pleaded which broke her out of her trance.

"I...I was scared I'm sorry. I hid the tablets"

"Why? I need them...Give me one thing in my life please. I need to go before they come and find me. I'm not going to prison!"

"But death is final. There's no way out if you do it and what's the point if you're not even a suspect yet? Eh? Please sweetheart, don't do this. Think about this" Audrey begged.

Her son began pacing up and down the living room. Sitting himself down in the far corner and breathing heavily. He kept thinking about ways out of this but found he only had one solution. He didn't want to go to prison, nor speak to the police under any circumstances. Not about this, he knew his days are numbered. When they discover Leo's cause of death and no doubt find his DNA. It's game over, isn't it? It has to be.

"They will find my DNA. My life will be over" Stephen reminded her.

"Why don't you escape the country then? Go back to Canada...I'll come with you, we can go to Quebec"

"I don't want to run"

So you'd rather die?"

"Yes"

Audrey looked back down with fresh tears coming down. Stephen got up and took out a notepad from one of the drawers as well as a pen. He began writing down the suicide note. He seemed much calmer, like death was going to be a nice little holiday for him. It was rather frightening and Stephen could see how upset she was so he put the notepad and pen back down. Calming himself down as he thought about her suggestion.

"If we do go to Canada, we will have to be quick. You understand we won't come back here" Stephen finally spoke more calmly.

"I understand. I'll book us two flights on a one-way ticket. I know I won't be able to get a visa or anything daft but they won't know I overstayed it, will they? I'll just go and make out it's a holiday"

"Just book us the flights and we will figure it out later. If you want to help me, mom. You do what I say. No goodbyes, we just pack and go with all the money you have. We will go under different names. Put your house on the market and take the first offer. We have no time for stalling-"

"They will know we left the country"

"Canada's a big place. They will know we left but they won't know where we are. We will go deep into Canada, away from the city"

"You promise you won't leave me alone there?"

"Mom. It's eaiser going on my own, so if I didn't want you there. I could just say no right now. You want to come, don't you? Actually do something for me for once, Don't you?"

"Yes-"

"Do it quick then"

...

"Gran just couldn't even look me in the face. And Sally had a go at me too the other day. Saying how I basically have no morals because of Callum and Damon" Sarah spoke to Gail with tears coming down.

"Sally has no right. She's a friend of mine but she's cheated on Kevin so many times when they were married. And not all of them were gentlemen" Gail responded while shaking her head.

"I know but her kids had a good dad and she knew who it was"

"Just ignore her, okay? She's mad on Tim and Elaine's behalf and you're an easy target. I'll have a quiet word because she's got no right judging you"

"Gran seems disgusted in me too. All she could say was how because it's my fourth child, it doesn't matter. It's not a big deal"

"She's mad on Stephen's behalf and has to put up a front. That's all that is...You're just caught in the crossfire. Well you know I'm excited and Adam's excited, that's all that matters" Gail insisted.

Giving her daughter a much-needed hug. Harry was thankfully busy on his IPad so he didn't hear this. Sarah was clearly distressed over recent events and it wasn't good for her baby. Though she knows she's causes her marital problems, she doesn't mind facing up to that but it was everything else. She couldn't handle people having a go at her over Stephen and his antics. Nobody knew he was back yet and he was planning on keeping it that way.

"What should we do now?" Sarah asked her mother.

"I think I'll phone up mam and see how she is. Go round to her house some time and you can take your baby scan picture. She's secretly happy for you know, I know she is. We could put on a movie and order a takeaway, how does that sound?"

"Sounds like what we did when I was pregnant with Billy"

"Nice plan then?"

"Yeah. As long as gran doesn't pick the movie"

"We won't let her. She hasn't earned the pick" Gail spoke with a small smile.

...

"We can't go. I just thought it through...We can't do anything. There's no way out for me. The minute I step foot outside, my whole face will be on CCTV. If they don't suspect me now, they will do when they discover I left the country. Police work together now, mom. Around the world...We are in the Commonwealth-"

"Stephen! Please listen to me for once...Leo's body have been found. There's no way around that. I have told the police that you haven't seen him for months, no more than Jenny or Daisy. Teddy is the one they are looking for" Audrey insisted with her arms crossed.

"And what if they find him?"

"They won't, will they?"

"He's down in the canals in the roofbox. I'm surprised he hasn't popped up again actually. But once he does, I'm gone. And I don't want to run...I will write this note and go"

Audrey was about to reply until the door began knocking. She watched as Stephen suddenly panicked. Not knowing where to go so he just rushed out the room and upstairs, locking himself in his mother's bedroom. Audrey breathing heavily as that's where she hidden the tablets. She went to the door and opened it to find Gail and Sarah. She tutted, annoyed almost that they have disturbed her. She looked as white as a sheet as she looked at them.

"Mam. Is everything alright? Me and Sarah wanted to see you, make amends once and for all" Gail spoke first.

"I said everything I needed to say" Audrey insisted.

"Gran. Please see me...I'm so sorry if I hurt you. I love you and want you part of my life. And I love Stephen too, you know that. He's been a great uncle throughout the years, you know that" Sarah piped up.

"Then why did you make him lose his job? Eh? Tell everybody about the shove? I can't do this right now. Just go"

"Gran-

"Just go!"

This made Sarah step back slightly. Gail didn't understand why Audrey was so bent on driving Sarah away. She had no idea of the demons Audrey was wrestling inside, how scared and disgusted she was at herself. The guilt was eating away at her from all different angles. Stephen was her son however and that the only reason she was putting herself through this grief. Gail waited for an answer but all she got was the door slammed shut. Audrey thus made her way upstairs, knocking on her own bedroom door.

"It was only Gail and Sarah. They are gone now...Let me in" Audrey pleaded weakly.

"Tell me where the tablets are first"

"Oh. Do you have to have them?"

"Yes. Please mom, tell me-"

"In the top drawer, alright? They are in the top drawer" Audrey finally admitted.

She heard him instantly go there as he opened it up. Taking tablets hidden between the fabrics. Audrey heard his footsteps as he made his way back over to the door, unlocking it again. Audrey looked at him holding onto the tablets, he put them in his pocket.

"I'm doing this, okay? I got to do this...I'll write down a note, okay? I already wrote most of it. I have to go, mom" Stephen spoke, confirming that he was going to go through with his suicide plan.

"That's it? You just given up?"

"I caused so much distress, haven't I? To you and to everybody else, I've got a sickness in me. I'm exhausted from it...There's no cure for me, I've been stalling and it's time to stop"

"Don't be so dramatic. It doesn't suit you"

"Oh I think it does. I'll sort it out, mom. Don't worry"

...

The night fell. Stephen had wrote down his note as he walked upstairs with him, putting it on his bedside table. He lifted up the plank in the floorboards. Taking out his little notepad which had all his ugly thoughts from the last year and a half. He put that on the chest of drawers. Audrey had been crying again, trying to convince him again but he wasn't having it. She even debated phoning the police at one point but that would only mean him hating her. She couldn't bear that, not even now. He said himself he would rather die than go to jail. This didn't feel real until Audrey heard him shut the door. She got out from her bedroom again, opening it as she saw him sitting on his bed and looking at the tablets.

"Mom. Just stop...Don't make me force you somewhere you can't see me" Stephen warned as he suddenly stood up.

"I'm your mother. You don't think this is killing me too? Knowing you're in the next room and you go could go any minute? This is forever-"

"I know. I'm sorry but you know the score...Please leave me in peace. I'll take them and before you know it. Everybody's pain, including your own...Will be over"

"That's not true. You think Jenny will stop feeling the pain of the loss of Leo because you're gone? Or I will? What about the family? The suffering we will go through...What have you even wrote in your note?"

"I wrote about what I did"

"Oh. Let me read it then now"

"If you must" Stephen spoke as he handed it over.

He watched as his mother read his note. He explained how he left Malcolm to die, how Leo was an accident. How he killed Teddy and Geoff because he felt he had no choice. How much he's sorry for the family and for his mom. Audrey passed it back with a deep sigh. She breathed in before going towards the bathroom with a feeling of dread. She began washing her face when she heard loud banging again. Stephen had slammed his door and began moving something against the door. Making sure she can't disturb him again.

"Stephen! Stephen! Don't do this...I love you! One more night! One more night, there's so much I haven't told you!" Audrey wept as she weakly banged on his door, she could barely move it an inch now.

She felt like that young girl again. Saying goodbye to him as he went on the Liverpool ferry towards Canada. She recalled yelling at the confused three year old to not forget she's his real mother. Joyce having to take him away quicker than expected as the sobbing teenage girl started screaming about having changed her mind. The guard forcing her to calm down as they reminded her she has a toddler with her, Gail being that toddler of course. Stephen paced around for a few moments before getting into bed as planned. He opened the tablets and began to take one after the other as planned. The last thing he heard was Audrey giving up on the door and going downstairs, no doubt ringing for help of some kind...

...

TBC