Summary: I don't want to be brave. I just want to be myself. I don't want to be alone anymore.
Notes: Two in the space of a week! Not really, this has just been sitting on my laptop for about a month and I forgot it existed till last night. This does contain spoilers to Merlin, but not much. Set somewhere during the whole Agent Liberty thing. They reveal some secrets about themselves, basically Kara and Lena tell each other who they are.
As always, let me know what you think.
Riv Riv :)
"I don't want to be brave. I just want to be myself. I don't want to be alone anymore."
Living forever. It seems like an inviting concept, right. You see the world change and evolve, empires rise and fall, and humanity learn and grow. But then, history had a way of repeating itself, like a stuck record. The same story, just in a different font, trying to dance its input into society, just to be filed away in the brains of those who bear the curse of remembering. Will humanity ever learn? Perhaps not, but then that's what makes it society.
This burden weighed heavily on Lena, particularly this morning. In a way, she was thankful her curse allowed her to die and be reborn, offering the small escape that was childhood from the horrors of humanity. But it was beginning to happen again; the human race had again chosen a target and zeroed in. It wasn't some fraction of people they had surrounded; it wasn't those who believed in different gods, who came from other countries, who had different skin. No, they zeroed in on those who truly felt most alone in the world, aliens. Refugees had lost not just their home and country but their planet and culture, clinging on with all they had to the last remains of home in this world.
She remembered what that was like, to be so scared of the world that fighting it seemed all but useless. To be terrified of who you are, burying your soul so deep down you forget who you are. Hiding away from her family because heavens forbid if her father found out, it wouldn't just be a night in the dungeons for challenging his ways. It would be a date with the gallows, the first course being the noose around her neck, and one final trip back to the castle in a coffin. Morgana wondered how people could be so deaf and blind to the very needs of the people they profess to serve and protect?
"Lena? Can I come in?" She was drawn out of her mind by the familiar voice of the blonde reporter knocking on the office door. "Yes, sorry, I was in my own world there." Kara sat down with a concerned look for the raven-haired woman. She had not seen her friend look so lost before. It was almost like she was numb to the events around her, like watching a memory unfold in the wind. "Snapper sent me here to get your opinion on the events surrounding Agent Liberty." Lena hummed in response, "I can come back if you would rather? Sorry for interrupting."
Before Kara could reach the door, several things ran through Lena's mind. She could give two opinions on the matter, one off the record and tell Kara who she is. The other on record, calling him out for what he was, was nothing more than a tyrant losing his power to the changing times. A man who would instead make the world toxic and terrible than conquer his own fears. A mask that she had worn before, and there was no doubt he would end up the same. Dying alone, realising she had become the very thing she was fighting against. Telling Kara who or, more accurately, what she was might give the blonde courage to open up. If not, it could provide Lena with some kind of comfort if the blonde didn't shy away. Someone to know all of her, not just the mask on display.
"Kara, wait! I'm not really with it. History just has its ways of repeating." The reporter was confused about the last statement. Sure, she had heard it before, but from old war vets, it was something grandparents said to children. It was not something she was expecting to come out of the 23-year-old. "Please sit down? I want to tell you about a person. This is off the record; I'll give you an on-record answer later." The reporter nodded, putting her phone and notepad in her bag and turning her full attention back to the woman next to her. She felt the air shift around them, seemingly cooling the room. She could have sworn she saw Lena's eyes go from green and blue to a glowing yellow, even if it was just for a second.
"In a land of myth and in a time of magic, the destiny of a great kingdom rests on the shoulders of a young girl. Her name was… Morgana. She was raised in Camelot, under the care of King Uther Pendragon, after her mother and father died in a great battle. She was relatively happy, enjoying time with her newfound brother, Arthur, and the royal staff. She disagreed with the King's politics and laws making the ways of the old religion a death penalty crime, but she would rather not get involved. Life was good until a new servant arrived when she was 16. Merlin. The boy initially confused her, but I guess you could say they became friends. As the year passed, she gained more courage to stand up for the persecuted under the King's laws, earning her a fair share of nights in the dungeons. Her nights were getting more restless despite the royal physician's treatments, her sleep painted in nightmares of her brother's demise.
One night the windows smashed, and the curtains were set ablaze. Small other things kept happening, like some of her dreams coming true, feeling connected to a little druid boy she helped escape the wrath of the King. As her power grew, she became more aware of the danger she was in. To be an outsider, to be ashamed of how you were born, to hide who you are. Living with the threat of execution just because you were born with magic."
Lena paused to take a breath, trying not to get lost in her own head, back in that cave long ago. Kara looked at her trying to piece the puzzle together, noticing how Lena shifted between 3rd and 2nd person. It was as if the CEO was talking about herself. Then it dawned on Kara; she was talking about herself. "Morgana?" The reporter's voice was shy and almost silent, as if saying the name would unlock a secret tavern buried in the depths of the woods. "No one's called me that in years; it could be centuries. I don't know. It feels nice to hear it, not in fear." Kara gazed down at the witch's hand, mesmerised by the glowing silver light gently weaving through her fingers, small whisps flying away into the air. "Can you tell me more? I want to know you."
"My sister came to visit about a month after my powers surfaced. I didn't know I had a sister. I always seem to lose her. Anyway, we would meet up in secret in the woods; she taught me how to use my magic, the gods that gave me my powers, and the culture of my people. Morgause taught me my world." Kara thought about Alex. The way she did the same gave her a world to call her own. It gave some comfort to her, knowing Lena had someone. "She told me who my father was. Not the man I believed was my father, who had been slain in battle when I was 9, but the man who I shared DNA with. Uther. The man I had come to despise, who I would send to hell without a second's thought. Who had murdered so many of my people." She wasn't sure if she wanted to share the rest, at least not now.
"I think I am done sharing for now. I promise I will tell you the rest, just not today." Kara did something unexpected; she hugged Morgana. It wasn't a new thing for the two to hug, but they were always short-lived, the awkward kind you give to an unfamiliar relative just to be polite. No, this hug was warm and caring, full of hope and love. The type of contact that made you feel untouchable; the world's armies could launch 1000 ships, and they would just bounce off you. For the first time since her mother in this reincarnation had died, Lena felt safe. "Thank you for sharing yourself with me. I promise I will protect you in any way I can." Kara released the witch from her embrace. Her turn now; Rao Alex was going to be mad.
"In the spirit of sharing, I have something to tell you. It's something I have wanted to tell you since the first day we met. I now know who you are, so it is only fair you know who I am." Kara paused, steadying her heartbeat before slowly unbuttoning her shirt. If Lena was uncomfortable by the apparent stripping, she didn't show it. Kara took one final breath before opening her shirt. "I am supergirl." This wasn't a shock to the witch, she knew. She had known after the first time she met them both.
"I know, I've known since we met Kara. Before you ask how, I first thought because your energy seemed off, not earthy as it will. You see, to me, everything has a different feeling; I guess you could call it a vibe that I pick up on. That's how I bind magic to things and people. So, I just thought you were an alien. Then Supergirl came to my office; she had the same energy. It took till the end of that week to fully confirm you were one and the same." The Kryptonian stared momentarily in disbelief, trying to understand what was happening. "But you didn't say anything?"
"Not my please to, mo ghrá. I knew you would tell me when you were ready. I actually hoped me telling you who I was would help, a stór. Now, do you like faeries?" The alien nodded, who didn't like fairies.
Lena sat on the sofa, mumbling something Kara couldn't understand under her breath, as tiny winged faeries appeared out of seemingly nowhere. Kara joined Laoina on the sofa watching the small creatures with wonder as they danced around the room, occasionally changing colours. Morgana's voice broke her out of her trance. "Now, shall we get to those questions?
Notes: So there you go. I know there isn't much Irish in this so I'm not going to translate it. The quote at the start is one of my favourite Morgana quotes from series 2 episode 11 of Merlin. If you haven't watched it, go do that now. Somehow nothing can beat the BBC between the years of 2008 - 2012, Merlin, Doctor Who, Torchwood, Sarah Jane Adventures, Call the Midwife. They were on a roll. Now I could go into the political paintings of Merlin and the extended metaphor of magic being a representation of the oppression of the queer community but I'm going to restrain myself.