CONGRATULATIONS TO THE TORONTO RAPTORS AND TO THE ST. LOUIS BLUES ON THEIR FIRST EVER WINS
Note: The flashback in this chapter takes place in between the events of the Redemption Squad Cometh and A Mermaids Revenge.
It starts in the living room. We were looking at a bunch of photo albums. The Fox Kids were with us.
Me: Boy those were fun times.
Maria: This also reminds me of that time we did a movie documentary about my times with you guys.
Me: I remember that. It feels like forever ago.
William: And that was shortly after we formed the Redemption Squad.
Pam: What happened back then?
Lynn: Well Pam it was back when we were getting ready to decide who gets to babysit the McCauley's.
FLASHBACK
In Maria's Room, Carmen and Maria were ready for the documentary. Carmen had a video camera with her.
Carmen: Ok, sis. Ready!
Maria: Hi there! My name is Maria Rockell. I am making this short movie to document my life with the Loud Family.
In Luna's room. Luna was doing her thing and Luan was there with a box of comedy props until Lori comes in.
Lori: Hey, are either of you guys free for a babysitting job tonight? Mrs. McCauley just called and I can't do it, I'm sitting for the Dunscombes.
Luna: Sorry, dude. I got the Katzes tonight. [picks up drum] I'm gonna teach Jaime and Sydney how to do a drum circle.
Luan: I'm sitting for the Santinis. I've got some great comedy props in case little Mary gets a ouchie. [hits herself with her hammer prop which she then faints.]
Leni came in.
Leni: [laughs and claps] Thanks, Luan, that makes me feel much better about my ouchie. [shows Leni's feet with a bandage on one of her toes.]
Lori: Hey, Leni, can you sit for the McCauleys tonight?
Leni: Sorry, I can't. I'm sitting for the Lewises. I'm giving Tia and Salome makeovers, they're one and two, it's time.
Me and Varie came in.
Me: Hey girls. What are you all talking about?
Lori: We're talking about who should go Babysit for the McCauley's. None of us are available because we have other clients. Would you like to do it J.D.?
Me: I'm sorry Lori, I can't. Me and Varie were tasked by Lady Tsunade to be 2 of her bodyguards while we escort her to the Five Kage Summit. It's being held over in Greenland. We're gonna be gone for a week.
Luna: What is the Five Kage Summit?
Varie: It's a very important meeting where the leaders of the Five Great Nations gather together to talk out their differences. It's like a summit at the United Nations.
Me: Right.
Lori: Hmm, okay. I guess I'll have to tell the McCauleys no one's free.
Leni: What about Lynn? She's 13, that's when we all started taking babysitting jobs.
Luna: I don't know, dude. She's not exactly the nurturing type.
Luan: And we don't want to blow our reputation as Royal Woods' best babysitters.
Lori: Well, that is true. But you guys, it's only fair that we give Lynn a chance.
(TV STATIC)
Maria was interviewing Static Shock.
Maria (to Static): Static, our viewers want to know. What it's like having me as a friend rather then an enemy now?
Static: Maria was once one of my most dangerous enemies, Aquamaria and she had water powers. Now she is one of the greatest heroes of all. She has an awesome boyfriend William Dunbar and they do all kinds of awesome adventures together.
[Lynn, in the meantime, is in the backyard, tire swinging like a gorilla. The twins are rolling along in Lola's car, and Lynn hangs upside down in their path, causing them to scream, swerve, and crash.]
Lola: Ow! Watch it you clod.
Lana: Know how long it's gonna take me to bump out this hood?!
Lynn: Sorry guys, apology punches! [Punches the twins]
Lana: Ow!
Lola: Ow!
[Lynn goes back to her swinging. Lily is innocently walking along, not seeing Lynn. Charles sees this, and quickly dives at her and end up in a fight circle which Lily wins. All the while, the older sisters watch all of this, shocked.]
Luan: Still want to give her a chance?
Fu: Come on guys. Go for it. It'll be a good chance for her to see if she can do it.
Luna: All right Fu.
[They then look over to Laney who is reading Squeals a book and then the girls got an idea]
Lori: Laney! Our favorite sister in the world!
Laney: What do you want this time?
Luan: We were just wondering if you were available to help with a babysitting job.
Laney: [gets up from her chair] Babysitting? Me?
Lori: You're literally perfect for it! You know more about babysitting than any of us. You're caring, nuturing...
Luna: That and you're so good at taking care of Lily.
Laney: Well, I am known for my fastest diaper changing record. That was before Lily got her powers though. I'll do it!
Lynn: [hearing this] Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, you can't give a babysitting job to Lamey! I'm next in line. [She hops out of the tire swing and lands right next to them.]
Lori: But Lynn, let's face it, you're not exactly the nurturing type.
Lynn: What now? I can nurture all day long. [Right then, Lisa comes out the backyard, carrying a jar of strange liquid.] Kids love me. [notices Lisa's presence and grabs her in a playful noogie.] Right, Lis?
Lisa: [slightly irritated by this] If it'll get you to stop bruising my cranium, I'll gladly respond in the affirmative.
Lynn: [drops Lisa] See? That's a yes. [Lisa notices her experiment is on the loose and chases after it in a panic.]
Laney: Not to take sides here, Lynn. But you don't know exactly what kids like to do.
Lynn: What do you know, Lamey?
Laney: [glares angrily] It's Laney! And I know way more than you!
Lynn: Says the girl who can't even tie her own shoes and has to wear laces!
Laney: [Angry] I TOLD YOU THAT IN CONFIDENCE!
Lynn: Come on you guys, fair is fair. I want some of that sweet babysitting moolah too.
Laney: You wouldn't make a dime without knowing when to tuck them into bed at night!
Lynn: I can do a lot better than you!
Laney: I can do a lot better than you!
Lynn: Oh yeah?
Laney: Yeah!
Lynn: Yeah?
Laney: Yeah!
Lynn: YEAH!?
Laney: YEAH!
[The sisters growl at each other]
Lori: Break it up you two! Clearly there is only one way to settle this!
Lynn: Bingo! Hot sauce eating contest right now!
Lori: No! Not again! I'm saying we'll send both of you to McCauleys to babysit and afterwards we'll see which one of you makes the better babysitter.
Lynn: It is so on!
Laney: You are so going down!
[The two contiue to glare at each other. Cut to later where Laney and Lynn are still glaring at each other at the McCauley residence and their parents drive off.]
Caleb: Uh, excuse me? [The sisters turn around to see the McCauley kids]
Laney: Oh. [clears throat] Hey, kids. So what do you want to do?
Caleb: Play with my science kit!
Camille: Play with my dress-up sticker books.
Laney: Well that sounds-
Lynn: [imitates a buzzer] Lame-o! Come on, I'll show you guys how to have some real fun. [Suddenly, the three are in a makeshift wrestling ring, wearing Lucha Libre masks, the McCauley kids are scared.] Alright, when I blow the whistle, you guys run to the center of the ring, and wrestle. [Blows the whistle, and the kids walk to the center of the ring, and hug.] Guys, Lucha Libre is a contact sport. This time, Caleb, you bounce off the ropes and come back at Camille with an angry possum! Like so.. [Before she did anything else, Laney stopped Lynn]
Laney: What do you think you're doing?
Lynn: Uh, teaching the kids how to Lucha Libre?
Laney: You will do no such thing! These are kids! You just can't teach them how to wresltle and use violence. [Pulls out Caleb's science kit] How about we just play Caleb's science kit instead?
Lynn: [Smacks the kit off Laney] Nope! That's you're problem, Laney. You don't know what children like.
Laney: [angry] I DON'T... [growls] That's it! Let's go! Right now!
Lynn: Bring it, sister! [Laney and Lynn then began to wrestle each other and the kids look at each other in concern]
[Later the kids and Lynn and Laney are in the living room Lynn brings out some condiments and frozen foods from their fridge.]
Lynn: Okay kids, clearly you're too weak to Lucha Libre. So we need to get you into shape. Your parents have a serious lack of exercise equipment, so we'll have to improvise. Camille, let's do some curls with these kosher dills.
Camille: [She tries to do one curl with them, but falls to the floor.] Ow! I heard something pop.
Laney: Oh my gosh! Are you okay!?
Lynn: She's fine. It's totally normal. [Camille whimpers as she tries to limp it off] Kay, Caleb, your turn. Let's see you dead lift this turkey. [She puts the turkey in front of Caleb and he groans.]
Laney: He cannot lift that and you know it!
Lynn: Of course he can! I've lifted thrice my weight when I was his age.
Laney: These kids aren't like you!
Lynn: Stop questioning my methods!
Laney: Only when your 'methods' stop being so questionable!
[The sisters began arguing again. And the McCauley kids knew that they could not get their attention. Minutes later, Lynn and the McCauley kids enter the kitchen, Caleb now having his back sore.]
Lynn: Important lesson for you guys, after a good workout, you always want to replenish those proteins.
Laney: Finally, something sensible [opens the fridge and pulls out a carton of eggs.] Now, who wants eggs?
Caleb: Ooh, eggs. May I have please have scrambled?
Camille: I like mine hard boiled.
Lynn: [imitates the buzzer again] Cooking takes too long, your body needs that protein now! [She cracks two eggs each for two cups then gives them to the McCauley kids. Caleb starts to whine.]
Laney: Are you out of your mind!? They can't eat raw eggs! They need to cook! [Laney pours the yolks into the frying pan]
Lynn: No! They need to eat them raw! [Pours the yolks back into the cups]
Laney: Cooked!
Lynn: Raw!
Laney: Cooked!
Lynn: Raw! [Lynn throws an egg at Laney]
Laney: Oh it is on! [Lynn and Laney then started to throw eggs at each other and the McCauley kids look at each other in sadness]
Caleb: Can we please go to bed now?
Lynn: Ugh, okay, fine. [Later, the McCauley kids are in bed and Lynn is telling them a story.] So I'm almost to the top of the climbing wall when I beef my foothold, lose my grip, and plummet twenty feet to the ground, bam! Broke my tibia so bad, you can see the bone sticking out through the skin. [Hearing that makes Caleb actually throw up]
Laney: What are you doing?
Lynn: I'm telling them a story.
Laney: About your injuries? You can't do that!
Lynn: You know what, Lamey? I am sick and tired of you always critisizing me!
Laney: And I'm tired of you trying to scar the kids for life!
Lynn: My injuries are very informational!
[Lynn and Laney once again began to argue and the McCauley's looked on sadly one last time]
[Back at the Loud House, the older sisters are on the couch when Lynn enters through the front door.]
Lynn: What up, fellow babysitters!
Lori: Hey, how did it go?
Lynn: Oh, great, I hit it it out of the park. Better than how Laney handled it.
Laney: Uh, I did way better than you! [To her older sisters] She had them drink raw eggs!
Lynn: She wanted to play with a science kit!
Laney: At least it was less painful then when you wanted to teach them Lucha Libre!
[Lynn and Laney started arguing again as the the older sisters left. Just then the phone started ringing and Lori answers it]
Lori: Hello? Oh, hi, Mrs. McCauley. What? She did? They did? Eggs everywhere? But, but- Okay, goodnight. [hangs up]
Leni: [She and the others walk over.] What happened?
Lori: Both Lynn and Laney completely negelcted the McCauley kids because they were too busy arguing! Lynn completely terrorized them and Laney was too busy competing with Lynn to even to take care of them. So now we're all fired as their babysitters.
Leni: [in union] What?
Luan: [in union] No way!
Luna: [in union] Bogus!
Carmen: Oh no girls. I'm so sorry.
Lori: It's all right Carmen. I think we need to have a little talk with her.
Carmen: Good idea.
[In Lynn's room, the older sisters talk to Lynn and Laney about what actually happened.]
Laney: That's what happened? Oh man! I'm so sorry we got you all fired!
Lynn: I don't get it. I thought we had an awesome night.
Luan: Lynn, you made a five-year-old hang upside down and do crunches.
Sakura: And I overheard that you made them eat raw eggs. Yuck!
Lynn: Yeah, and his abs and muscles will thank me.
Lori: We're sorry, but you can't be in the babysitting group anymore.
Lynn: [now upset] What? Come on! It's not my fault those kids didn't know how to have fun! Give me a decent family and I'll show you I can crush it!
Lori: Sorry, but we just can't afford to lose any more clients.
Laney: What about me? Maybe you can consider giving me another chance?
Lori: Laney, you were literally too busy arguing with Lynn to actually do any babysitting. I'm sorry but both of you are not capable to do the job.
Lincoln: [pops in] You know, I'm available for babysitting.
Lynn: Get out of here, Stinkoln'! [throws her football at him and he falls to the floor.]
Laney: You can't just do that!
Lynn: You stay out of this, Lamey!
Laney: [angry] IT'S LANEY!
Lori: This is literally what we're talking about. [She and the others leave the room.]
Laney: [realizing her folly and sighs] What am I doing? I was so busy trying to compete with you that I totally forgot what's really important. Taking care of the kids.
Lynn: [flops onto her bed and growls in frustration] Just so we're clear I can do so much better than you.
Laney: Lynn! I'm serious! If we're gonna fix this we need to start working together. Even if we have different approaches on babysitting.
Lynn: Hmmm. [Gets an idea] You know what, Laney? You're absolutely right.
Laney: Wait. You're agreeing with me? Who are you and what have done with Lynn?
Lynn: I'm serious, Laney. We need to work together to show our sisters that we need this job. [to herself] Me more than you... [To Laney] So I have an idea that will set everything right... [Whispers the plan into Laney's ear]
Laney: What? No way Lynn! You're on your own!
Laney walked away and went back to her room. Carmen came in and she had the camera.
Lynn: Lemme guess. You want to speak my mind about having Maria as a friend, right?
Carmen: There's that, and Lori, Leni, Luan, and Luna seem to think that you can't babysit. What are your thoughts about that?
Lynn: I think it's awful what they said! Lori may be the eldest but I don't go down without a fight! Leni thinks I'm unable to be nurturing! Luna is wrong and Luan? Don't get me started with her.
Carmen: Any other opinions?
Lynn: Lori said I was an un-nurturing type! Leni and Luan said I was rough and reckless, Luna said I was a bad babysitter! Well I will show them!
Carmen: Okay. What are your thoughts about Maria?
Lynn: Maria is an awesome friend and she is a great swimmer like Tamao, Lana and Varie. But she should play different sports to add variety.
Carmen: She should huh? And they do say variety is the spice of life.
(TV STATIC)
Static: Maria became Aquamaria when she was exposed to the Bang Baby Mutagen Gas. She was swimming in the river when she was exposed and it turned her into pure water. But thanks to J.D. and his friends, she has her humanity back. Also it was the help of Carol Pingrey Loud that she became a great friend and a powerful ally.
(TV STATIC)
Lynn: Maria has been giving me awesome advice on how to win and play better at sports. And its been really helpful. She is awesome at sports even though she is a swimmer.
(TV STATIC)
Carmen: Lori, before you give your thoughts about Maria as a friend, our viewers want to know. How long have you, Leni, Luna, and Luan been babysitting for?
Lori: Ever since I was 13. That's when we all started.
Carmen: That's great! That is the best age to start.
Lori: Maria is literally the most amazing friend anyone can ask for. She makes shopping at the mall and it is literally awesome!
Stewie: Maria is an amazing friend and she is an astounding force to be feared.
Brian: She sure is. If Quahog is watching this, your days are numbered.
Carmen (still holding the camera): Thanks for those kind words, Stewie.
Stewie: No problem. (gets serious) And now, here's a message to all the remaining adults of Quahog. I know I've done some bad things in the past. But those days are behind me now. I now have new friends, a new team, and a new family to help and protect. My name is Stewie Gilligan Griffin and this is a message to Quahog. Leave Royal York alone. Because me and my friends are coming... for you.
Carmen: Well said Stewie.
(TV STATIC)
Carmen went into Ed's room.
Ed: Hey, Carmen.
Carmen: Hey there, Ed. My viewers are just wondering about your thoughts of having my sister Maria as a friend.
Ed: Uh Maria is an awesome friend and she loves helping her friends and she and William go perfect like Buttered Toast and Mashed Potatoes and Gravy.
Carmen: Nicely put Ed. Great combination with commentary and food.
(TV STATIC)
At the Local Bank, Carmen was interviewing Spiderman.
Carmen: Hey Spiderman.
Spiderman: Hey, Carmen. I'm just waiting for my gold-stealing buddy Joseph Lorenzini A.K.A. Hammerhead to come through those bank doors so I can send his sorry ass to prison.
Carmen: That's good. While you're waiting for that, can you tell me your honest thoughts about having my sister Maria as a friend?
Spiderman: Sure. You have an amazing personality and a very caring heart.
KRABOOOM!
Spiderman: That's him!
In came Joseph Lorenzini A.K.A. HAMMERHEAD.
Little is known about Hammerhead's origin. The unnamed Maggia gangster named Joseph was wounded in a brawl and was discovered by the scientist Jonas Harrow, who replaced the gangster's shattered skull with a steel one. When he awoke, the gangster only remembered a 1920s movie poster, and soon became obsessed with it. Taking the name Hammerhead, he favored 1920s clothes and weapons, and became a crime leader when the Kingpin stepped down for a short time. Hammerhead was often at odds with fellow crime lord and supervillain Doctor Octopus, as well as his mutual enemy Spider-Man.
Several supervillain criminals have worked for Hammerhead, including Tombstone, Electro, and the Tinkerer, who once made a cybernetic exoskeleton for Hammerhead, in which he battled the Human Torch.
Carmen fired a powerful blast of fire at him and burned him and he was on the ground screaming in pain.
(TV STATIC)
Maria: That was a great job sis!
(TV STATIC)
Carmen: Venom, do you and Eddie Brock have any thoughts about Maria as a friend you want to share?
Venom: Me and Eddie will gladly share.
Eddie: I think Maria is an awesome girl. She has amazing power and is a giving and compassionate soul.
Venom: I agree with you Eddie. She is an awesome girl that can take on anyone evil.
Carmen: Great thoughts guys.
(TV STATIC)
Eddy: Maria is an awesome girl. She is like Nazz back when I used to live in Peach Creek. She is smart, compassionate and willing to defend her friends and family no matter what.
(TV STATIC)
Panda King: Maria is a girl of magnificent honor and she carries a heart of gold.
(TV STATIC)
Ben: Maria is an amazing girl. She is just as amazing as my ex-girlfriend Julie back home.
(TV STATIC)
Riley: Maria is so amazing. She is a true friend and a very caring soul.
(TV STATIC)
Jasmine (GX): She is an amazing friend and she is a great swimmer and she has amazing power that can bring any villain down.
(TV STATIC)
Mindy (GX): She loves Duel Monsters just as much as anyone else and she is a great collector as well as a great fighter.
(TV STATIC)
Alexis: Maria is an awesome friend and a great partner. She has done all kinds of good deeds in Duel Academy when we're not fighting crime.
(TV STATIC)
Sora: Maria is truly an amazing friend with a great heart of good. Her gentle nature can help others and protect people and that's what makes her a great friend.
(TV STATIC)
Sly Cooper: Maria has all the awesome qualities of a true master thief. She can sneak in quietly in her water form without anyone noticing and she is a brilliant and stealthy person. She is a true friend and knows how to get the job done.
(TV STATIC)
Danny: She even has an awesome personality that would give the most evil of ghosts nightmares. But she is a great friend.
(TV STATIC)
Luan: Maria is an awesome and funny person. She likes all my jokes. They are ones that Wave to you. (laughs) Get it?
Carmen laughed behind the camera.
(TV STATIC)
Lola: Maria is an awesome friend and she is perfect at Tea Parties and loves helping me get ready for my pageants. And she makes me feel like a true princess in a castle.
Carmen: Nicely put Lola.
(TV STATIC)
Numbuh 1: Maria is very smart and talented. She can kick any villain into pulp and save a lot of kids from anyone.
(TV STATIC)
Numbuh 2: She's great at helping me with 2X4 technology. And her jokes are as funny as mine. I mean WATER you all waiting for?
Carmen laughs.
(TV STATIC)
Numbuh 3: Maria is an awesome lover of Rainbow Monkeys like me. She loves the blue ones the best.
Carmen: They are cute huh?
(TV STATIC)
Numbuh 4: Maria is an awesome friend and she knows how to kick some major butt!
(TV STATIC)
Numbuh 5: Numbuh 5 likes hanging out with Maria. She's an awesome friend that can kick our enemies butts.
(TV STATIC)
Tara: Maria is awesome! She and I have been great working together as a team.
(TV STATIC)
Carol: Maria is more than just my best friend. She's the best little sister ever. I'm 17 years old and Maria is 16. I've always been there for her since we were in kindergarten and I was sad to see her go. But we were close through it all regardless of how far apart we were.
(TV STATIC)
Batman: Maria is an amazing girl. She was cursed with a bad ordeal in Dakota City, but thanks to Carol and all of Team Loud Phoenix Storm, she was cured and reunited with her friends.
(TV STATIC)
Raven: Maria is a great friend. I may be half demon and the daughter of an interdimensional monster, but I have a heart.
(TV STATIC)
Starfire: Maria is an awesome friend. And she is an amazing learner about my Tamaranian Culture. She's also learning fast in learning about the Tamaranian Language.
Carmen: I'll have to see that for myself Starfire.
(TV STATIC)
Cyborg: Maria is an awesome and most amazing girl. And she loves pizza as much as anyone else. And she can kick butt like all of us! Boo-yah!
(TV STATIC)
Robin: Maria is an amazing girl. And she can do anything with water and she is also a great leader. I'm very proud of her.
(TV STATIC)
Beast Boy: Maria loves animals as much as I do. And she loves learning so much about them. She is an amazing friend.
(TV STATIC)
Leslie: Maria is a great friend and an awesome teammate. She can help get us through anything when the situation gets rough.
Agony: She sure can. Maria is a strong girl.
(TV STATIC)
Luna: She is a rockin' friend dudes.
Carmen: Rockin dudette!
(TV STATIC)
Ash: She likes Pokemon as much as I do and she likes Pikachu too. Right buddy?
Pikachu: Pikachu.
(TV STATIC)
Aqua: Maria is a true master of water and her heart is full of the purities of the ocean and the serenity that flows through it.
Carmen: That's an awesome and very philosophical way to describe her.
(TV STATIC)
Terra: Maria is a force of nature and she can make any bad guy quake with fear.
(TV STATIC)
Edd: I think Maria is a wonderful friend that has a very strong correlation with me and my fellow gentlemen.
(TV STATIC)
Star: Maria is the most awesome and most magical friend ever! She could've extinguished that freak Tom.
(TV STATIC)
Lucy: Maria may have been through some dark times in her times of darkness, but she always knows how to embrace the darkness of her times to use against her enemies.
Carmen: That's my sister for you Lucy.
(TV STATIC)
Lily: Maria is an awesome swimmer and she can swim really well with awesome grace in the ocean. But she is an awesome and loving friend.
(TV STATIC)
Riku: Maria's heart is full of good. She can make sure that all villains get justice.
(TV STATIC)
Elena: Everyone knows that water conducts electricity and me and Maria are awesome together as friends and more. We're like sisters.
(TV STATIC)
Laney: I think Maria is the most amazing and most smart girl I know next to Lisa and she is a really great swimmer.
(TV STATIC)
Lisa: Maria Rockell is an amazing female friend unit and she has the intelligence capacity and skills to help us out of any situation when it dictates.
(TV STATIC)
Leni: Ooh! We're doing an Interview! Yay! My favorite color is Zebra. And I don't like socks with sandals.
Leni has a brain the size of a walnut.
Carmen: (Facepalm) Focus Leni.
Leni: Maria is totes a great fashion designer like I am. She can make all kinds of great clothes.
(TV STATIC)
Lana: Maria makes great mud for me to play in and she is awesome with my animal friends. Plus she is a great swimmer and loves splashing me.
Carmen: That's my sister Lana.
(TV STATIC)
Lincoln: Maria likes my comics and is great at video games. She beat me and Clyde at Muscle Fish and she is a great video game player.
Carmen: My sister is an awesome Video Game champion.
(TV STATIC)
William: Maria is the most beautiful and most amazing girlfriend ever. She is as graceful as a mermaid and is just as beautiful as one.
Carmen: You are a great boyfriend William.
[The next day, all the Loud siblings are watching TV on the couch, except Lori, who is on her phone, and Lucy, who is reading a book. Just then, the house phone rings.]
Lynn: I got it! [answers it] Loud residence, Lynn Jr. speaking. [She hears someone on the other end and sneaks off into the dining room, makes sure the others are still distracted, then responds.] Oh, hi, Mr. Dunscombe. Sure, let me ask Lori if she's free on Friday. [walks over to another spot then speaks in a muffled tone, then goes back to the other spot.] Sorry, Lori's not available, but I'd be happy to babysit. [She hangs up and takes her seat back on the couch.]
Lori: [concerned] Who was that?
Lynn: A ding-dang telemarketer. I told him to buzz off.
A FEW DAYS LATER...
[The older sisters are in the kitchen. Leni and Luna are having coffee, and Luan is having a bowl of cereal.]
Lori: So, you guys didn't have any babysitting jobs this weekend either?
Luan: Nope. Didn't get a single call.
Luna: [in union] Deadsville.
Leni: [in union] Me neither.
Lori: Weird. Maybe we should check in with our clients.
[The four girls are now in different locations of the house, on their cell phones.]
Leni: Hi, Mrs. Lewis.
Luan: Hi, Mr. Santini.
Luna: Hey, Mr. Katz.
Lori: Hi, Mrs. Dunscomb.
[They all hear what their clients have to say.]
Lori, Leni, Luna, and Luan: Lynn did what!?
Lori: I can't believe this! Not only did Lynn steal our jobs but she lost us 4 more clients!
Luan: We have to tell her this stops now!
Fu: I can't believe Lynn would do this to you!
Luna: What are we going to do 'bout Lynn? We know she ain't gonna listen to what we have to say. You know how she is.
Luan: [Thinking of something] What if we can get her to want to quit babysitting?
Leni: How would we do that?
Luan: Easy, get her to sit for the worst kids in Royal York.
[They all get closer together, knowing who that is.]
Lori, Leni, Luna, and Luan: The Fox quintuplets!
Fu: Who are they?
Luan: They are Spawns from Satan!
Lori: Ugh, they are literally a nightmare. [Flashback to them throwing stuff at Lori while she was hiding behind the couch.]
Leni: [Flashback to them locking Leni out in the rain.] So mean.
Luan: [Flashback to them throwing a bucket of ice water on Luan while she was sleeping.] Little monsters.
Luna: [Flashback to them flushing stuff down the toilet.] Bad to the bone.
Fu: THEY WERE THAT HORRIBLE!?
Lori: They literally were.
Luan: So, it's a plan?
Lori, Leni, and Luna: It's a plan.
Fu: It's genius.
[Meanwhile, outside the backyard, Lynn is throwing some pitchers at her goalie net when the older sisters approach her.]
Lori: Hey, Lynn, can we talk to you?
Lynn: [knowing where this is going] Okay, I know what you guys are going to say but before you get mad, let me explain-
Luan: Oh, we're not mad.
Luna: We get it, dude, you were just trying to prove you can handle babysitting.
Leni: And guess what? You proved it.
Lynn: Really? So, your clients liked me?
Lori: Literally loved.
Lynn: Yes! I knew it. I told you guys! So, you're taking me off the bench?
Lori: Yep. In fact, we already have a new client lined up for you.
Lynn: Sweet, who is it?
[Later, Laney was in the livng room watching tv with her pig Squeals, when Lynn interrupted]
Lynn: BOOM! I'm back in the game, baby! I got a gig! In you're face, Lamey!
Laney: First, stop calling me 'Lamey'. And two, really? They're really giving you another job after what you did?
Lynn: Yeah! Lori said all the clients loved me! So they gave my own babysitting job! I guess I do make the better sitter after all!
Laney: Well, congratulations Lynn. So who is it?
Lynn: I'm babysitting for Mr. and Mrs. Fox. Welp, I gotta get going! [leaves] See ya, Lamey!
Laney: Stop calling me that! [sighs] Well, at least it's nice to know that Lynn finally gotten a chance to- [Realizing who Lynn was babysitting for] MR. AND MRS. FOX!? That means she's babysitting the Fox Quintuplets! The meanest, craziest, baddest, straight up most horrible children on Earth! [Squeals squealed in terror] Oh man! What was Lori thinking! There's no way Lynn can babysit those monsters! Not with her expertise!
[Meanwhile, Lynn was at the Fox residence and the parents drive off.]
Lynn: Later, Mr. and Mrs. Fox! [closes the door] So, gang, what should we do tonight?
[Lynn is then shocked by what she sees; The one in green is finger painting on the wall, the one in blue is squirting ketchup and mustard into a table fan, the one in red is bow and arrowing the goldfish, and the one in white has an angry raccoon. She is shocked, she looks over and sees Pam standing next to her, Pam is looking at Lynn, and holding a hose. Pam sprays her right into the door, and all the quints surround Lynn and laugh menacingly, Lynn gets a nervous look. Back at the Loud House, Laney and Squeals were trembling in fear thinking about what Lynn was going through]
WELCOME TO HELL!
Laney: I gotta do something Squeals! Those kids are gonna eat her alive! [Laney dashes off to save Lynn but she stopped when Squeals oinked at her] What's that, Squeals?
Squeals: [Oinks]
Laney: Good point! I'll need protection. I'm not going in there unarmed. [Cut to Laney in her closet putting on an armored knight costume from her chest, a super hero utility belt and holds a plant sword in her hand]
[Later the older sisters were in the living room when they saw Laney coming down with her armour]
Luna: Uh, what's with the duds Laney?
Lana: Are you going out to slay a dragon?
Laney: No Lana. I wish I was. I'm gonna go save Lynn from the Fox Quintuplets!
Lori: Laney, relax. Besides, she deserves this after she costed us more clients. If she kept this up, we would literally lose our jobs!
Laney: But assigning Lynn to the most terrible kids on Earth? No one deserves this! You guys know what they're like.
Luan: Exactly, that's why we gave Lynn the job.
Leni: Yeah, I bet by now those little monsters have trapped her in the crawl space like they did to me.
[The older sisters laugh while Laney is terrified by the thought]
Lori: Or, rolled her up in a rug and pushed her down the stairs like they did to me. [They laugh again, only a little more dwindled.]
Luna: Or, threw a skunk into the bathroom while she was doing her business.
[The others are just aghast at this, they all then start to look guilty.]
Luan: Well, Lynn had it coming.
Lori: Literally.
Laney: Really? I mean, sure she has no idea how to handle kids but that is no reason to punish her like this.
[A few seconds of silence.]
Leni: [giving in] Guys, I'm trying to be a team player here, but I'm starting to feel bad.
Luna: No, dude, I get it. I am too.
Lori: Me too. Lynn's only 13, and who knows what kind of horrible mess she's in right now.
Luan: And all she wanted was to be a part of our babysitting group.
Laney: I can get where she's coming from. She was really determined to be a good sitter just like you guys. Just like I was when you guys thought I could do it.
Leni: Yeah.
Lori: [immediately gets up] We have to go help her!
Luna: [gets up as well] Agreed. But first, Laney, you think you can score us some protective gear? [Laney grabs a rack of armour costumes]
Laney: What size?
Carmen: Lori, you, Leni, Luan, Laney and Luna are about to save Lynn from the Fox Kids. Do you 5 have anything to say to Eddy, Sam, Joey, Bobby, and Ed before this daring rescue?
Lori: We literally never should've sent Lynn into the Lions den!
Leni: Totes! We have to save her!
Luan: There's no Lion out of this one! (Laughs to rimshot) Get it? But seriously, we have to save her!
Luna: Lets do it dudes!
Laney: Yeah!
Sam S.L.: You can do it love!
Eddy: Go save her My Angel of Comedy!
Joey: (British Accent) Be careful Laney.
Bobby: Show no mercy Babe!
Ed: Gravy!
Eddy: Shut up Ed.
[The five girls approach the Fox residence, with their gear, and knock.]
Lynn: [Answers the door, unharmed] Hey guys, what's up?
[The five roll into the house, commando style, and get ready for a fight, much to Lynn's confusion. The four are then surprised by what they see; the Fox quintuplets are all sitting around reading.]
Laney: Uh, I think we got the wrong house.
Luna: Yeah. I thought you were babysitting the Fox quintuplets. Who are those guys?
Lynn: Those are the Fox quints, duh.
Laney: Aroo?
Luan: Wait, how did you get them to behave?
Lynn: It was a cinch. [Flashback to dinner, the quints are having a food fight while Lynn looks on with a displeased look.] First, I showed them that if they want to get crazy, I can get ten times crazier. [Lynn gets up, lets out a yell, and throws the entire dinner aside, leaving the quints shocked. Another flashback shows the quints playing tug-o-war.] Next, I wore them out with athletic competition. [Another flashback to Pam cleaning up her toys and Lynn giving her a thumbs up.] And lastly, three words, [She grabs Pam and gives her a horsey ride.] horsey, reward system. [Flashback ends]
Lori: Wow! Impressive.
Laney: I can't believe it! You did the impossible! You tamed the Fox Quintuplets. You really are the better babysitter.
Lynn: Told ya!
Lori: Well, anyway, I guess we should get going.
[They all start to leave, but Lynn stops them.]
Lynn: [Suspicious] Wait a minute, what's going on? Why'd you even come here in the first place?
Luna: Nothing, dude, we were just in the neighborhood.
Laney: Doing some... cosplay?
Leni: We were? I thought we came here because we felt bad about trying to get Lynn to quit babysitting.
Luan: [laughs] That's funny, Leni, but jokes are my territory. Come on, let's go.
Lynn: You wanted me to quit babysitting, why?! You said your clients loved me!
Lori: Well, they didn't. You actually terrified their kids, but now I think I know why, they just weren't the right kind of kids for you, these guys are. None of us could handle them, but clearly you're doing great.
Luna: We're sorry for trying to mess with you.
Lynn: [rubs her arm] Well, that's cool. I guess it wasn't so great that we stole your clients. And I'm sorry I got you involved in this, Laney.
Laney: And I'm sorry I was so crossed with you about you not knowing how to take care of kids.
Lynn: Me too. Apology punches! [punches her sisters]
Luna: Dude!
Leni: Ow!
Luan: Ow!
Lori: Ow!
Laney: Ow!
Pam: [She and her brothers head upstairs.] Coach Lynn, we're ready for bed!
Lynn: Well, duty calls. I'm glad we're good, I'll see you guys at home. [heads upstairs and the four girls leave.] Who wants to hear about the time I broke my tibia?!
Fox Quints: I do, I do!
Laney: Wow, they really are perfect for her.
[The next day at home, the four sisters are in the living room. Lori is texting on her phone, Luan is reading a book, Luna is strumming her guitar, Leni is filing her nails and Laney was playing with Squeals. Lynn shows up with her duffel bag.]
Lynn: Off your butts, ladies. You've all got babysitting jobs tonight.
Luan: What are you talking about?
Lynn: I got your old clients back. It took a lot of begging and pleading, and the apology punches didn't help, but I was able to convince them.
Luna: Mighty dece' of you, sis.
Lynn: Well, see you later, I'm sitting for the quints. Now that Mr. and Mrs. Fox have found someone who can handle their kids, they're going out, like, every night. Yo, Lanes. You wanna come with? We can share the load.
Laney: Thanks, but no thanks Lynn. I had enough babysitting for one day.
Lynn: Your loss. [She leaves the house]
Me and Varie walked in.
Me: Hey guys, we're back.
Lori: Hey J.D. How was the escort mission?
Me: It went off without a hitch Lori.
Carmen: Hey J.D. do you have any opinions about Maria?
I saw the video camera.
Me: Making a short movie, Carmen?
Carmen: Yep. To end it, do you have any thoughts about Maria to share?
Me: Okay. Maria is an awesome friend. She has really come a long way ever since we helped everyone out in Dakota City.
Carmen: Thanks J.D.
[That night at the Fox's, Lynn and the quints are Lucha Libre wrestling, Lynn blows her whistle, and the quints are loving it.]
Stevie: [As Lynn has him over her head.] Best babysitter ever!
[Lynn laughs]
FLASHBACK ENDS
Me: That was really cool though.
Maria: It sure was.
Lynn: Boy I can't believe I was like that. My competitiveness was a monstrosity.
Me: It was.
Later we were having a special sports party. We were celebrating the first ever Stanley Cup win of the Saint Louis Blues and the first ever championship ever won for the Toronto Raptors. Never in the history of the 54 years of the team on the NHL have they won the Stanley Cup. All of the state of Missouri was going ballistic. Also The Toronto Raptors have never won an NBA Championship for Canada. All of Canada went crazy when the Raptors won. We had sports meals, sports appetizers and more.
Me: This is so awesome! I'm so happy for Saint Louis and Toronto.
Vince: Me too partner. I'm so happy that the Blues won their first ever Stanley Cup!
Me: Me too partner. And I'm so happy for the Raptors.
Bridgette: Me too. Hooray for Canada!
Me: A toast to the first ever victories of the Saint Louis Blues and the Toronto Raptors!
Everyone: YEAH!
We clinked our glasses and cheered.
Carmen: (To the viewers) I love our babysitting adventures and our awesome adventures and more. But no one likes a babysitter that takes sports too seriously.
Lynn: (Offended) HEY!
THE END
Another Fanfiction Complete
Sitting Bull is one of my favorite episodes. I love how Lynn babysat the Fox kids and it was awesome! NicoChan11 gave me the ideas for this one. Thanks man as usual. Let me know what you all think. And congratulations to the Saint Louis Blues and the Toronto Raptors.
See you all next time.