A/N: It's been a rough day for me, but I can't make you lot suffer the same so here's a bonus to get us to even days. Cos that feels better, somehow. I have Saturday off this week so I will finally be able to get some serious writing time in so I can get you more chapters as we approach the rather large gap I've left myself between Chapter 41 and whatever else I have. Why I do this to myself, I genuinely do not know.

-0-

Hermione was pacing outside of the Hospital Wing Sunday morning when Madam Pomfrey unlocked the doors. They shared a look before Madame Pomfrey nodded her inside.

"He is fine," she said before Hermione could speak. "But he is still sleeping."

"I just want to see him for a moment," Hermione asked. "I won't even touch him if you don't think I should."

"You may," she chuckled. "I believe his brothers are coming to see him. They were in the area."

"It was his birthday yesterday. They are trouble, but they are good brothers. I'll make sure they know to behave."

Madame Pomfrey laughed and showed her inside the cubicle Ron was occupying. Hermione made a noise at how pale he was and pressed her hand on his shoulder. Madame Pomfrey waved her wand and shrugged when Hermione looked at her.

"I'd rather see what was going on officially if I have the option to," she chuckled. "My husband would have a field day."

Hermione smiled but didn't comment. After their last meeting, she had done her level best to mind her own business, but as she glanced up at Madame Pomfrey again, the woman laughed.

"There's no point pretending he doesn't exist now, is there."

"I guess not," Hermione muttered. "Sorry."

"Don't be," she soothed. "Now. What is it that you do?"

"On purpose? Nothing," Hermione laughed. "Inadvertently?" She shrugged and closed her eyes. Her hand got warm where she was touching Ron and she looked over at Madame Pomfrey, who had a quill and parchment in hand, taking notes.

"I've just realised that's exactly how people see me, most days."

Madame Pomfrey snorted but didn't stop and made a few more notations before Hermione stepped away and Madam Pomfrey cancelled the spell.

"It seems as though you aren't doing anything specific. I wonder if it could be pointed if you know what I mean; channelled to a specific site."

"Probably. Although we don't really know what this is."

"I heard tell otherwise?"

"Oh?"

She chuckled and wrapped her arm in Hermione's as she came around the bed.

"Come and have a cup of tea with me and we'll chat."

Hermione shrugged and followed the woman into her office and sat down on the little sofa beside her desk.

"For you," Madame Pomfrey smiled as she passed over a cup of tea. "Oh," she sighed as she sat. "Some mornings it is difficult to get going."

"I don't really have that problem anymore," Hermione muttered. The medi-witch seemed unphased and Hermione suddenly realised why she was there. "Ah," Hermione chuckled. "I see."

"Do you? How interesting."

"You don't care what is going on with me, you want to talk about her?"

Madam Pomfrey put down her tea and turned to face Hermione.

"Not to only talk about her. If you are struggling, then, of course, we shall talk about it, and I do care, Hermione. Genuinely. But I do wish to take the opportunity to caution you against meeting her stubbornness head-on. I have spoken a little with Albus and though I have not seen Minerva socially since Miss Bell's unfortunate incident, I know enough about what went on in that hospital bed that I can only imagine what she," she apologised with a look. "What you are both going through."

"She blames me," Hermione whispered sadly. "She says it's my fault, but it's not." To her horror, a fat tear welled up in her eye and rolled down her cheek. "I didn't want this, I didn't orchestrate it, Madame Pomfrey. I was shot by a fucking Death Eater after everyone cocked up the stupidest fucking plan I've ever heard and in the process gained these new fucking powers that nobody has a name for and then! I lost my best friend!"

"Oh, sweetheart, come here," Poppy said quietly and wrapped her arms around Hermione.

Hermione sobbed into her shoulder all the while she tried not to. It had been so long since someone older than she had held her that she dissolved into almost hysterical tears. Madame Pomfrey made conciliatory noises while she rubbed Hermione's back, but for the most part, she allowed Hermione the time to cry.

As the tears dried up, Hermione burned with embarrassment, but Madame Pomfrey was unphased.

"Now now," she said gently, passing over a hanky. "Don't fret. I have been Minerva's friend for longer than you have been alive, my dear. It would be unusual for you to not shed tears over Minerva."

Despite the few pathetic sobs she could not stop, Hermione laughed and dried her eyes.

"I just want her to listen to me," she said sadly. "I need her to hear what I'm saying. I have no more say in this than she does but she just blames me."

"I'm not sure it is blame," she said gently. "Minerva finds emotion difficult to control. She falls back on anger quite a lot, no matter what the original feeling is."

"I'm finding that."

"I did warn her to try and control that but again, I cannot even begin to imagine what you're both going through." Madam Pomfrey rubbed Hermione's thigh. "Remember that she has been alone and quite fine with it, for a long time. And this," she motioned between them. "Would be difficult for any normal person to understand."

"I know that," Hermione groaned. "I'm not stupid. I'm 17, I'm effectively still a student. Still her student. I recognise that's," she huffed. "A lot younger and potentially," she winced. "Well, awkward. But I have already told her that I'm not pushing her into anything. I just," she crossed her arms and lay back on the soft cushions. "I want it to go back to the way it was."

"You know that's not ever going to happen, sweetheart," the woman said gently.

"I can't help but wish for it though."

Madam Pomfrey sat back with her and they sat in silence for a while.

"I'm not going to attempt to speak for her," she said. "I wouldn't ever dare, but there is hope. There's always hope, Hermione."

"Not much of some," she muttered.

"Even a sliver of hope it's enough. You already know, to an extent, that anything you do with Minerva requires a bit of patience. Well, this will require more. And it is a lot for you to hear, and to take on, but you need to be the stronger one. The best way to get Minerva to listen is to give her the straight facts. In as few words as possible. It is possible she will not listen the first 42 times, but we may get lucky on the 43rd."

Hermione laughed again and as Madam Pomfrey reached over and squeezed her hand, Hermione saw just a flash of the woman laughing in the arms of a very tall gentleman with salt and pepper hair, a wide smile and familiar green eyes. She didn't draw attention to it, but she wondered why she could pick up on her emotions and thoughts, and not many other people's. Even Ginny only gave off feelings, Madam Pomfrey gave off whole scenes.

"I'm not very patient anymore."

"Well," Poppy said, slapping her thighs as she rose. "I suggest one of two options. Go and see her now, give her the facts and let her ruminate on them or give her time to work through it and see her after."

"How long is that likely to be?"

"It took her 16 years to forgive me for marrying her brother, so -"

Hermione groaned into her hands, even as she laughed. She looked up and offered her hand as she got up.

"Thank you. I," she sighed. "Just thank you."

"You are most welcome. Though Minerva doesn't often partake in my services, my door is always open if you need a friendly ear. Just because I am her friend & sister-in-law does not mean I cannot be your friend too."

"Thank you again," Hermione said genuinely.

Madam Pomfrey smiled and Hermione left without another word. She patted Ron's foot on the way past and went back to her dormitory. A quick nap and then she would meet Minerva at ten, where she would have a decision to make.

-0-

As soon as Hermione stepped into the room, Minerva clutched her hands together in an attempt to disguise the tremble in them. She wasn't sure she was quick enough when Hermione took a step forward then sighed and stood where she was.

"I'm not here to fight," Hermione said quietly. She seemed to be in more control of her original tone when she whispered and for once, Minerva was thankful for it. "I just want to talk."

"We should -"

"We should do nothing for anyone but ourselves," Hermione sighed, maintaining her distance. "I am not interested in doing this for the good of others, Min. This is for us, or not at all. It doesn't really matter what everyone else thinks."

"Well, it is obvious to everyone we've had a falling out."

"A -" Hermione gaped. "A what? You call this, a falling out?" Her eyes flashed as her voice rose. "You call completely abandoning me and blaming me for everything a falling out? Are you crazy?"

The volume made Minerva wince but she equally was not going to be outmatched.

"I am not crazy," Minerva yelled. "I have been bullied into a situation that I have no control over with no thought or consideration for my well-being."

"WHAT!" Hermione yelled this time, with just a hint of anger in it. It made Minerva's stomach roll uncomfortably. "What! This whole thing has been about control? I haven't sought to control you? In fact, I've flatly told you, repeatedly, that I would never and you still do not trust me. That is the real issue. I have somehow, overnight, turned into someone you cannot trust, despite me showing you again and again to the contrary and despite -"

"I cannot think with you in my face," Minerva snapped, so overwhelmed she didn't even know what she was feeling.

"Fine!" Hermione yelled. "I'm going for a walk." She slammed open the door and the noise crescendoed as it hit the wall. Hermione hesitated, with one hand on the door where she had caught it as it swung back. Minerva watched as she took a deep breath and turned back around. "Minerva," she whispered. "I told you. All I want is my best friend back. Nothing beyond that. Please! Please listen to these words if you do nothing else. Trust me not to hurt you. I have never knowingly hurt you. Remember what I said about my feelings. Remember what we had before all this. I just want you back. Back to what we were."

Minerva didn't reply but as soon as the door closed she dropped to the sofa and curled around her stomach. She felt bereft but she was so abominably confused, she didn't know what to do in the slightest. She rocked back and forth for a long while before she stood and Flooed to Poppy.

"Come in," Poppy smiled. "I figured you might come by."

"I am doing it again," Minerva muttered, her chin wobbling. "Coming to you in my hour of need."

"As well you should," Poppy protested. "I would be concerned if you went elsewhere."

"You know what I mean."

"I do," Poppy chuckled as she sat down and took her hand. "But you are here now and I am all ears, my friend. Tell me whatever you can or want to and we shall attempt to unjumble it."

"How much has he told you?"

Poppy didn't need to pretend who he was, and she smiled, patting Minerva's hands.

"I know about you and -" she looked sideways at her. "Should I call her Hermione?"

"Please," Minerva swallowed. The last thing she needed was more reminders that she was technically still a student.

"I know about you and Hermione. I have guessed some and picked up what has been unsaid by others. He did come and speak to me about what we saw. But," she sighed. "I have a feeling that your biggest issue is that you think, perhaps, that this is why your friendship has been bothering you all along?"

"I don't know," Minerva wailed, making them both jump. "Merlin, Poppy, I do not know. Have I always had feelings for her? Since she was a child?"

"Well, answer that for me," Poppy shrugged. "Did you?"

"No!"

"Well then," Poppy chuckled. "I know you didn't. But she is no longer a child, Min. We've been over this. She is part of The Order, perhaps a little before time, but with this added conviction," Poppy shrugged. "She is a bright young woman, whose every move is to do for other people -"

"You have spoken to her?" Minerva snapped.

"I have," Poppy said gently. "Twice in fact."

"When!"

"Two days after she left here," Poppy soothed. "She came back to see me, to apologise for what happened. She is a charming young woman. Intelligent and insightful. Initially, that was only what it was, but as we shook hands at the end, she picked up about the twins without me telling her - and Will." She hesitated but Minerva's hands were flexing and she felt like she wanted to leap at the next Death Eater and claw his eyes out.

"Tell me," Minerva ordered.

As Poppy touched her arm, the thumping in her head seemed to calm down. Somehow she could tell that Poppy wasn't interested in Hermione. That in itself made her feel sick.

"That was not -" Minerva swallowed.

"What just happened?"

"I," Minerva swallowed. "Was uncomfortable."

"You were jealous?"

"I have no right to be," Minerva railed. "And then when you touched me, I knew. I knew you had no feelings for her and I knew it," she stared at Poppy. "How would I know what you are feeling?"

"Because a part of you is in tune with a creature, Min. Perhaps a part of you is already one." Minerva opened her mouth to explain but Poppy stopped her. "No, don't tell me because that way I can deny it if it ever came to it. Whatever type of entity she is, you are part of it. As are Mr Potter and the two youngest Weasleys and I assume, Albus based on that whole tattoo business?"

Minerva did not confirm or deny but Poppy clearly had already understood. She trusted her friend explicitly so she wasn't worried about it getting out, but she was worried about her being targeted.

"I know you would not say anything," Minerva said seriously. "But you are now, inherently, in more danger than before."

"Not many people know how close we are, Min. My position is as much a cover as it is convenient for hiding me in plain sight. Nobody notices the healers in the moment of battle. Beyond that, we have always made sure that nobody knew."

Minerva couldn't deny it and they fell into silence.

"Let's make this easy," Poppy said quietly. "Do you think her pretty?"

"What?"

"Beautiful? Gorgeous? Delightful?"

Minerva could feel the blush rising on her cheeks but she found no scorn on Poppy's face.

"Yes," she whispered.

"You find her desirable?"

Minerva's eyes closed and a tear slipped down her cheek.

"Yes," she admitted as she covered her mouth with a shaking hand. "Merlin, I do."

"Before this?"

"There was a moment," Minerva whispered. "A fleeting moment that I did not really even notice at the time. We were duelling, back before all this happened. There was so much magic in the air and she is -" She let out a wobbly breath. "She is so accomplished, Poppy. Spells flying from her wand, new spells that she made on the fly and she looked so beautiful with her hair hanging down around her shoulders and there was something calling to me." She blinked and looked up at her friend. "There is a practice among some magical users that is quite -" She swallowed as she felt her cheeks heat up.

"Intimate?" Poppy guessed.

"We were laying on the sofa together."

"You were laying on the sofa?"

"Please don't interrupt," Minerva muttered. "Or I may not tell you."

Poppy made a zipping motion on her lips and folded her hands on her knee.

"Intimate was a good word for it," Minerva whispered. "Though I hate it. I do not even know what possessed me, but we were laying down, we'd laughed over something and she was playing with my fingers. Just pulling on them, curling my nails and twisting my rings." Poppy nodded as she paused. "I, well, I took her hand and, well there's a practice that is usually reserved for people who are -" She swallowed again and Poppy chuckled.

"Intimate."

"Stop saying that," Minerva snapped. "It is more than that, it is compatibility. Connection. One's magic seems to connect almost, with the other person's. I showed her how to wandlessly summon a book. That was all it took, that one moment. I should have known, I should have noticed but I chalked it down to us being kindred spirits. We were so connected, it didn't occur to me to think of anything else. We," She put her hands on her hot face. "We often curled up on the sofa together. That wasn't new. But the magic should have made me think twice. And so many other fleeting moments that I did not understand at the time. I craved her. I wanted to hold her but more than that," she blushed. "I wanted to be held by her, but now? I mean, I took her to dinner, Poppy! I prevented a young man from propositioning her with such venom that I thought he might relieve himself in fear. And," she shrugged. "Aside from thinking she was a beautiful young woman in the abstract," Minerva shrugged. "What if I have never had feelings for her other than this pull?"

"Surely that is as legitimate a feeling as any other?" Poppy smiled. "I do not believe she would ever force you, Min. Nor accommodate whatever this is by coercing you or pressuring you? In fact, I know she would not, based on our conversation."

"What did she say? You said you spoke to her twice?"

"Not much," Poppy admitted. "And," she hesitated but Minerva arched her brow. "She was here this morning actually. She cried a lot. Bemoaned your terrible temper."

Minerva stood with a wail and paced in front of Poppy's desk.

"I believe that she wouldn't. But, I do not know what I feel, Poppy. Beyond that which I feel is artificial."

"Oh, love, I do not think it is artificial," Poppy said gently. "Her eyes when she looks at you or thinks about you," Poppy smiled when Minerva looked at her. "Your eyes when you think of her, for that matter. There is not something making you look like that. There was nothing but love in her eyes, Min. Not lust, even," Minerva blushed. "Love."

"Poppy," Minerva whispered. "I know I am not ordinarily effusive about my emotions, but I don't mind telling you that I am utterly terrified."

"I know you are," Poppy soothed. She stood and wrapped her arms around Minerva tightly. Minerva held on tightly. "Have you told her that, Min?" Poppy asked softly. "Have you spoken of this at all?"

"I can't think when I'm around her," Minerva muttered. "She attempted to speak to me before I came here. But I cannot even breathe when she's in the room." The tears started and she couldn't seem to stop them. "Poppy, I can admit to you and only you that I adore her but she makes me so -"

"It's alright," Poppy whispered, wrapping her arms around Minerva's shoulders again. "It's okay."