Moon Goddess and the Dumplings: IV

The silence which had followed their departure from the trio of Riders – and one wayward Assassin – had been at best awkward and at worst cringe inducing. Gwyndolin had returned to his physical form and had barely exchanged any words with even Artemis, despite her repeated attempts at starting conversation.

Whatever pleasant mood he had prior to Rayshifting down and slowly but surely had built up further in his interactions had aged like a fine vintage of milk.

The God was currently leading the column from the front, having long since taken over from Ritsuka's place and the Master not wanting to contest his place in the travelling group. Mainly because despite not actually seeing the God's face, Ritsuka could tell he was on the receiving end of one of those types of looks that just made you want to not argue with the person giving it.

Therefore, himself, Mash, Ash, Artemis and her small bear were picking up the rear a good distance from the God.

"...Do something." Ritsuka whispered to Ash, the Saber seemingly jolted at being addressed before turning down to look at Ritsuka with an aura of bafflement.

"Do...What do you mean 'Do something?'" Ash asked with no small degree of confusion.

"It's your God he's mad at." Ritsuka whispered back "I don't know...see what's wrong?"

"S-see what's-!?" Ash cut himself off, looking back to Gwyndolin. Seeing that the God displayed no evidence that he heard him he turned his attention back to Ritsuka "We'll assume for a moment that I don't have a personal hatred for Gwyndolin." Ash reminded him, the Master responding with a wince at that particular fact "And that he seems to tolerate my company at best. This is a personal matter between the two of them and one which I do not feel qualified to intervene in."

"I think Ash-san is right, Senpai." Mash pointed out "...Well, except for the hating part." she corrected with a small frown "But it seems that this is personal between Gwyndolin-san and Faraam-san...I think that Gwyndolin-san is still troubled by it."

"So...what do we do?" Ritsuka asked with a shrug, sending a slightly concerned look towards the Darkmoon God "He looked like he was starting to enjoy himself and then…" he gestured to the God with a small wave of his hand "He went all...sullen."

"Grudges between Gods are different to those between mortals, kiddo." Orion spoke in a hushed tone, earning the attention of the others "You gotta remember, Gods and Goddesses live a heck of a lot longer than any of us so and they've got a long memory to match their age."

"Are you calling me old Darling?" Artemis asked, Orion scoffed in response.

"You're older than me." He pointed out "And not that there's anything wrong with that, you still have a young and very voluptuous body, alright?" Artemis preened at the compliments "Anyway, you might consider holding a grudge for a couple hundred years ridiculous but these guys don't think like that. Time doesn't matter as much to them. Grudges against mortals can last the poor sods entire – likely violently shortened – life and between other Gods...that's a hole different type of sunken ship."

"I sometimes had some problems with Apollo." Artemis admitted with a shrug "Although I did still love my brother…" she trailed off as she stared at Gwyndolin's back, a saddened look entering her eyes "...I don't think that he has that much love left in him to give."

"He spoke about Anor Londo." Ritsuka frowned, looking to Ash "What was it?"

"The City of the Gods." Ash replied immediately "All of them lived there when the Age of Fire first began...under the rule of Gwyn. Lord of Sunlight." the Saber exhaled "...And it is common knowledge that the Gods abandoned it on mass when the flame began to fade."

"All of them?" Mash asked, Ash shook his head in response.

"...All but one." He replied, nodding to Gwyndolin "It seems as though Gwyndolin remained from the First Age of Fire until the very end...well, you know how he died anyway." the pair grimaced at the reminder of the Gods less than pleasant demise.

"Yeesh." Orion looked at the pairs reactions "From the looks of it, it weren't that great."

"No." Ash sighed "It was not…"

"Anyway. Way I see it. Best to leave those two to their grudge." Orion went on "Either they'll sort it out or they won't, not the place of mortal men like us to try and interfere in the personal lives of Gods."

"Orion-san...didn't you seduce Artemis-san?" Mash pointed out, the Bear turned to her with a flat expression.

"That wasn't so much interfering in Artemis's personal life as becoming her personal life." He gestured to himself "See how well that worked out?"

"...Point taken." Ritsuka nodded his head, turning his attention back towards Gwyndolin "It just...it feels wrong to leave him like that."

"I mean, if you really want to try and push your luck with them and probe the issue it's your funeral." Orion shrugged his small bear shoulders "But I really wouldn't recommend it. I'd say your best off leaving him to calm down and finish up your current task of finding your missing stuff."

"He's probably right." Ash nodded towards the small bear "It is best we prioritise our objectives. As...troublesome as Gwyndolin might be, his issues with his older brother are not our immediate concern. Finding out missing supplies – and Patches – are."

Ritsuka frowned in response but eventually gave a rather slow nod of the head, he did agree that the missing food was more important. But he didn't really want to leave Gwyndolin alone like that, it felt a little cold. Although he didn't have any siblings so he couldn't really say he understood the whole dynamic between them.

The group continued to follow the trail along the beach front before they noticed Gwyndolin stop ahead of them. The God remained stationary long enough for the others to close the distance and join him. They soon noticed the issue at had.

"Tide must have come in." Ash scowled as he stared at the washed away tracks before glaring at the sea "Taken away the trail."

"That sucks." Orion huffed "...Now what?"

"Well…" Ritsuka rubbed his chin in thought as he stared at the sand, looking further up the beach with a thoughtful expression on his face before turning his head to see the beach lead off onto a grassy patch and another path. "I say we split into two groups." he affirmed to himself, turning back to the others "One carries on moving up the beach and the other takes the path to see what we can find."

"Myself and Artemis shall take to the Beach." Gwyndolin stated, turning away and moving up the sand before anyone else could offer a word in. The others watched him depart in silence before they all turned to look at eachother.

Ritsuka cringed at the God's actions before turning to look at Artemis, he offered her a hapless shrug in response "I don't really want to push you-"

"It's fine." Artemis cut him off "Besides, a moonlight walk on the beach is a really romantic moment and I'm always happy to get one with Darling." she looked down at the bear who could only offer a 'what can you do?' expression. "Although it might be a bit awkward with another God but I'm sure I can walk far enough behind...unless he wants to talk." Artemis muttered to herself before shaking her head "Oh well!" with a final smile, she shot off after the other Moon God, leaving the trio alone on the beach.

"Never been on a beach before." Ash muttered, staring away from them and towards the seaside "...Are they all like this?"

"Sandy?" Ritsuka asked, when the Saber nodded he gave a small hum in response "I guess...although when you've seen one beach you've kind of seen them all." he paused before he went on "Doesn't make it any less enjoyable when you go to one however, especially during the summer."

"Summer?" Ash turned to him then made a noise of realisation "Ah, the changing of the seasons. Never experienced that either. It was normally an abrupt shift in the weather pattern." he explained as he moved along the sand and towards the path "The general theme was...really warm."

"An uncomfortable warm or a 'this is nice' warm?"

"You have to remember my physical senses are very muted." Ash chuckled "So what would qualify as warm for me would probably be quite hot for the pair of you."

Ritsuka blinked and shared a look with Mash before looking back to Ash "That is probably a fair point." he cringed, a new image entering his mind "Hate to see what passes for cold for you."

"Oh...Irithyll was rather nippy." Ash remarked "...But the painted world of Ariandel." his voice turned distant "That...was cold." the manner in which he spoke the word made phantom shivers run up Ritsuka and Mash's spines. Not out of disturbing imagery but more so they could tell that anything Ash could apparently describe as Cold with his limited senses must have been freezing for them.

"What was it like?" Mash asked, Ash turned to her with a cocked head in a questioning manner, she flushed slightly "W-well...Its places that don't exist here and I think it would be nice to hear about them."

Ash seemed to debate answering the question for a few moments, then when he noticed the hopeful look on Ritsuka's face he caved "Well...It was a frozen wasteland." he bluntly put "However like with most painted worlds, there had been some form of civilisation there."

"What is a painted world anyway?" Ritsuka asked "I don't think you ever explained."

"Did I not?" Ash questioned "I could have sworn the term was mentioned."

"It might have been mentioned before." Mash replied to him with a small frown on her face "But I can't remember getting a proper answer."

"Oh...Well." Ash hummed in response "Painted Worlds are...well. Worlds that exist within paintings."

"…"

"…"

"Is...um…" Ritsuka raised an eyebrow, making a gesture with his hand to compel Ash to continue "Is that all you're gonna give us?"

"It's a painting which contains another world within it." Ash shrugged "It is a remarkably simple concept."

"I...don't think it is, Ash-san." Mash replied with a tilt of her head and a confused expression on her face "Is it a whole other world?"

"I never explored all of Ariandel, so I can't answer for sure." Was the reply she received "But I would assume they likely have their limits."

"So...its a world...inside a painting?" Ritsuka asked, Ash nodded his head in response.

"Yes."

"...Alright then." The boy blinked and looked away "That sounds...magical."

"I would say so, Senpai." Mash added on, then turned back to Ash "Did anything live there?"

"...Lost souls." Ash replied "It was where those who had nothing left when to...live, I suppose." he paused for a few moments "Or die...one of the two."

"Sounds...lovely?" Ritsuka grimaced "You went there?"

"I didn't go to stay, if that's what you mean to imply." Ash waved away his look of concern "I was sent there at the request of another. He had been waiting for an unkindled to happen upon him and asked that I go to Ariandel to introduce fire to the painted world."

"You went on a Quest?" Mash surmised with an inquisitive look in her eye, Ash nodded his head.

"I did." He affirmed "It was also one of the few times I did something of my own accord. Gael only asked me for help, he didn't demand it. I could have simply left him alone but...well...I suppose I wanted to do something for myself."

"Did you succeed?"

"Yes." Ash sounded rather pleased with himself in his reply "I did...anyway, you were asking about life there, yes?" at the pairs nods he went on "Well...I wouldn't know all that much about living there. Like I said, it was a frozen wasteland but the occupants were certainly monstrous beings. In terms of strength, anyway. But if you were to ask me about what the day to day life was like...I wouldn't be the one to ask."

"Did you know anyone who lived there?" Ritsuka asked, Ash let out a heavy sigh in response.

"...Gael stayed there briefly. Although I don't think we were really friends. We spoke but not at length and not that often." Ash's voice turned sour "...There was one other who came from the painted world that I am now, unfortunately, better acquainted with."

"Really?" The Master blinked in response "Who?"

"Sulyvhan." Ash spat out "It seems he too originated in Ariandel, if what he told me in Rome was to be believed...it seemed he was also familiar with Gael." the unkindled sighed as he rubbed his head "Honestly...it seems as though the entire affair was far more interlinked than I first thought."

"Sounds...rough?" Ritsuka paused as he thought of something "Does that mean everyone else in the Painted world was like...you know...trees?"

"Hm? No...there were a variety of different races there." Ash explained "There were the Corvians, a mix between man and bird. Then there were the tree spirits themselves, of which I can assume Sulyvhan was birthed from...then there were undead who had gone hollow and wolves. Well...they were greatwolves much like Sif."

"Sounds diverse." Ritsuka mused "Bird people."

"Bird people indeed." Ash chuckled at the amused expression on the boy "Although it was less amusing when one backflipped through the air after throwing three knives into your face and then trying to run you through with a rapier."

"...They could do that?"

"Some...I preferred to avoid those ones." Ash scratched his helmeted chin "Much like I preferred to avoid the Millwood knights. Well over twice my size they were and carrying weapons blessed by Earth Spirits."

"They had Fae blessed weapons?" Mash blinked at him "Really?"

"Something blessed them. They could churn up the ground beneath your feet with ease." He explained "Anyway-"

"Hey." Ritsuka paused and pointed ahead, squinting his eyes "Those werecats are gathering around that tree." the other two followed his hand and noticed the gathering of the humanoid animals. All of which were at the base of a tree, hacking and slashing at the trunk.

"They seem to be doing something to the tree, Senpai." Mash remarked as she furrowed her brows "They...maybe there's something there."

Ash squinted his eyes "I think...I think I can see a man in the branches."

"Wait what!?" Ritsuka gaped at him before looking back to the tree and, sure enough, on the highest branch there seemed to be a man clinging to the tree for dear life as the werecats continued to claw away at the bark to get to him. "Holy crap! We gotta help him!"

"Yes, Senpai!" Mash nodded her head, readying her shield "Lets go, Ash-san!"

"On it." Ash nodded his head as he broke out into a run up the path and in the direction of the werecat gathering, Ritsuka and Mash following behind him as they approached.

"...Soooooo..." Orion spoke first, breaking the silence that had been going on since they had broken away from the other two and begun walking "...Nice Moon God, eh? I know one of those."

"...I know." Gwyndolin responded after a few seconds silence, not even turning to look at Orion.

"...You...um...get out often?"

"...No."

"Cool...cool…"

"…"

"...Ever had sex?"

"Pfft!" Gwyndolin sputtered, spinning around to face Orion and Artemis "I-What!? In what manner is that any concern of yours!?"

"Well...just making conversation and...wait a second." Orion squinted his eyes at the God "Are you...blushing?"

If one looked close enough, they would have been able to see a hint of redness encroaching upon the pale colouration of Gwyndolin's cheeks. The God immediately stilled, the redness intensifying as he span around so as to not face the bear. "I-...It isn't important." Gwyndolin went on.

Orion stared at his back before a few moments before he spoke again "Are you...a virgin?"

"W-what?" Gwyndolin scoffed "N-no." he replied in a tone of voice which made it painfully obvious he was lying "B-being a virgin after more than a hundred thousand years...ridiculous."

"...My guy." Orion looked horrified "...What happened?"

"E-even if I were!" Gwyndolin span around to face the two of them "What is so wrong about that? I don't really need to engage in...physical intimacy with a woman."

"I mean...she doesn't engage in physical intimacy." Orion motioned to Artemis who was cradling him in her arms "But she's supposed to be the virgin Goddess...what's your excuse?"

"...T-there was...um…" Gwyndolin sputtered, the redness of his cheeks now completely clashing with the rest of his skin "There weren't any...women who really...interested me." he looked away, hiding the bottom half of his face with his hands "W-well that and...um...I...I don't know how you...um…"

"Oh shit…" Orion gaped in realisation "You...By the Gods man...have you even touched a woman?"

"Of course I have!" Gwyndolin exclaimed in indignation "I have...h-held hands with one."

"Awwww~" Artemis cooed as she stared at Gwyndolin with bemused expression, akin to staring at a younger sibling "Who was she?"

"...She was a friend." Gwyndolin replied "A-and I've gotten hugs from my little sister! So...t-there you go!"

"Ah…" Artemis paused "Well…"

"Look...You've got no experience." Orion shook his head "And the experience you apparently have is, lets face it, pretty pathetic." he paused for a few moments "You aren't actually supposed to be considered a Virgin God right?"

"No."

"Well, you got nothing to worry about then." Orion threw his small arms wide "Just find a cute girl...or maybe a guy, I don't really care what gets your jollies on, and just go to town."

"Darling!" Artemis smacked him on the back of the head "You can't just tell him to do that! It isn't romantic at all!"

"R-romantic!?" Orion scoffed "It's basically a one night stand to get the guy into the realms of manhood!"

"...Manhood?" Gwyndolin parroted with a suddenly hesitant tone of voice "D-doing this...makes me a man?"

"Well, that and hunting something for the first time." Orion responded "Killing your first beast and having your first time with a woman." the bear nodded in a sage manner "Don't matter how-ouch!"

"Darling!" Artemis scolded again with a frown before looking back to Gwyndolin and changing her expression to a more giddy one "You need to be all romantic with your own darling. They need to set your hear afloat with a rapid beat and then…"

The older God listened with rapt attention, Gwyndolin would admit that he was entirely out of his element here. Despite the fact his mind was still distracted by the reunion with his older brother, he would admit that the sudden shift in topic did take up much of his attention. In truth, he was rather grateful for that.

If only it would make more sense to him. Romance sounded hard.

Orion watched as the God in front of him seemingly manifested a small parchment, an entire desk and chair – even offering one to Artemis – and proceeded to make notes at her lecture on romance. Unfortunately for Orion, his pearls of 'wisdom' were frequently interrupted by Artemis swatting him on the head and continuing to fill the God's head with her own view of what romance was.

And Artemis was, in fact, very sickly sweet with her views. It was part of her charm but Orion couldn't really see the other God pulling it off.

Despite how – objectively – cute he looked. Although being cute and being a guy probably wouldn't win him much. Then again, the world had changed and there were servants from different times gathering around. So it was entirely possible that this poor soul would find one he could lose his virginity to.

He wouldn't make any bets on it though. The poor guy was blushing at the thought of holding hands.

Ash shoulder barged into the werecat at breakneck speeds, the sound of crunching bone as his armoured body slammed into the beast indicated that damage had definitely been done. The nearest werecat span around to face him, barely having a moment to look surprised before he took its head off with a single swing of his sword.

The others were quick to cotton onto the fact they were under attack although they were far too slow to react completely. Mash struck another werecat in the back of the head with the tip of her shield, the skull caving inwards with a meaty thud and the beast dropping to the ground instantly, the girl the span on her heel and swung the shield upwards in an arc and slammed it into the chin of another of the beasts. The animal flipping due to the force before faceplanting into the ground, as it attempted to get up she pulled her sword from its scabbard and thrust it through the back of the creatures head.

Backhanding the axe with enough force to wretch it from its grip, Ash threw his then free arm forwards and latched his palm onto the front of the beasts face. The werecat had scarcely a second to register the sudden build up of heat before the explosion of fire erupted from the unkindled's hand and consumed the werecats head in a ball of orange before it collapsed backwards.

The Saber lowered his arm and looked around, nodding to Mash as she pulled her sword free and sheathed it again and turned to the Saber and giving her own nod. She then looked away and towards Ritsuka as he came to a stop near them "Hostiles eliminated, Senpai."

Ritsuka looked at the bodies for a few moments before he shook his head "I think I'm getting too used to the sight of mythical beasts from history being killed." he wondered aloud before he moved towards the tree "Hello? Is there someone up there?" he shouted up through the branches, for a few moments there was a rustling before a shape fell down.

The three took a step back as the man pushed himself up to his feet and looked around at them before at the corpses. Dressed in a simple brown tunic with a face which felt just about average, the brown haired man stared at the corpses in surprise and then looked to the group "Y-you killed them!" he exclaimed in surprise before rising to his feet "I honestly thought I was a gonna there, really!"

Ritsuka nodded to him "Happy to help, we spotted you hiding in the tree and rushed over as soon as we could."

"I thank you for your kindness friend." He nodded in response, a warm smile on his face before realisation came into his eyes "I-in fact, I dare say I should repay you for this!"

Ritsuka and Mash looked at eachother for a few moments before back to the man, Mash spoke first with a reassuring expression "There isn't a need to reward us. We're just happy to help."

"Really?" The man looked surprised at them, looking at all of their faces before shaking his head "Blimmey. Think you've seen it all and you get some good will left in the world. Still…" he frowned "There is something else you can do, if you don't mind that is." he added on hastily.

The Master blinked at the man before tilting his head "What is it?"

"Well, I was carrying a cart you see." He explained "I'm just a harmless merchant but I was ambushed by these things." he gestured to the bodies "But my mule, they scared him off the poor thing and I saw him disappear over that ridge." he pointed behind them, Ritsuka, Mash and Ash followed his finger towards the small hill. "I heard a horrible scream and well...I'd hate to think anything happened to my mule my goods." he shook his head "It was quite a bit of treasure." he looked to the pair of them before he widened his eyes "I-I'd be happy to give you some if you helped me."

Ritsuka shrugged his shoulders "How about we see about your mule first." he replied, gesturing for the man to lead on. "I'm Fujimaru Ritsuka by the way."

"Pleasure to meet you." The man smiled at him and nodded "My friends call me Pate." he looked over to Mash "And you my dear?"

"Mash Kyrielight."

"...Ash." The Saber responded to the unasked question, tilting his head to the side as he stared the man up and down before shaking his head. Seemingly dismissing whatever thought he had in his head.

"Well, pleasure to meet you all." Pate replied with a grin as he led them away, as Ritsuka and Mash crested the hill they looked over it to see a small gap in the Earth which fell into a small ravine. The bottom of which wasn't visible in the least.

"Oh…" Pate sucked in air through his teeth as he looked over the edge "...Looks like its a lost cause." he sighed, shaking his head "All that treasure...gone to waste and all."

"Well...I'm sure we can help somehow." Ritsuka gave the man small smile "It is your livelihood. Probably wouldn't be very good if you lost all that stuff, right?" he looked to Mash for support.

"Right, Senpai." She nodded her head, turning back to the man "Don't worry, Pate-san! I'm sure we'll get your supplies out of that pit."

"Thank you again." He nodded to them, looking away and squinting into the ravine "Wait...I think I can see it!" the man exclaimed, pointing into the darkness "Down there! Take a closer look!" Pate took a step back as the three looked over the edge of the ravine and into the darkness.

"Really?" Ritsuka squinted "I don't see anything."

"Oh...In that case." Ash's undead heart stilled as he heard the sickeningly familiar voice behind him "Why don't you take a closer look!" he span around just in time to see Patches grinning face before the man slammed his heel into his chest, knocking him off the edge and into the darkness below.

Patches was a lot faster on the draw than Mash or Ritsuka, pushing the dark haired boy into the arms of the Shielder and causing both of them to lose their footing. Ritsuka let out a very manly scream as the pair of them fell into the darkness below.

Mash brought her shield into existence, looping her arm around Ritsuka protectively and holding the shield out in front of her as they accelerated downwards. The Master felt his bones rattle as the shield impacted against the rock face on either side of the ravine as they fell downwards, his body jostling although Mash held her grip.

After what felt like an eternity to him, there came one final collision as they slammed into the bottom of the pit. Ritsuka let out a hiss at the sudden deceleration, although Mash still held him tightly in her arm.

"Senpai!" She called out in concern "Senpai! Are you alright!?" he looked up, barely making out her frantic expression through what little moonlight was filtering through the top of the entrance to their small pit.

"Y-yeah." He groaned, rolling out of her arms and onto his back with a wince "Just...a little rattled is all."

"Patches!" The two of them turned to see the outline of Ash stood up and glaring upwards "So help me-!"

"You can't really blame me, friend." Came the voice from the top, now sounding more mockingly amused than mild-mannered as it had before "If you're really gullible enough to keep falling for it." Patches clicked his tongue, shaking his head "Honestly, it seems human nature very rarely changes wherever you are. Always someone being far too greedy for their own good. You've only yourselves to blame!"

"G-greedy!?" Mash squawked in shock "We were trying to help you!"

"And yourselves as well." Patches retorted "I saw the way your eyes all lit up when I said treasure." he chuckled, pushing himself to his feet "But don't worry, I'll be sure to make use of whatever trinkets I pull from your corpse!" the man let out a final laugh as he disappeared out of sight.

"Why that-!" Mash let out a small growl before shaking her head, looking more downcast "Sorry, Senpai. I let my guard down."

"No...Mash." Ash shook his head, turning to her "This is my fault. Considering he's already gotten me three times now, I really should have been more adept at seeing the signs."

"So…" Ritsuka coughed, cringing as he got back to his feat and rolling his shoulders "...That was Patches, huh?"

"Indeed." Ash nodded with a sigh "That was Patches. He hasn't changed that much either."

"So...now what?"

"Well...I would suggest climbing." A new voice called out from behind Ritsuka, the boy letting out a squeak and spinning around while his two servants prepared themselves for violence. When a sudden light illuminated the darkness, the Servants instantly lowered their weapons at the sight of a familiar figure.

"Solaire?" Ritsuka barked out in shock, the Sun Knight stood in front of them with a torch raised high "W-what are you doing here!?"

"The same as you, I imagine." The Knight sighed "In truth, I have been here for quite some time."

"Are you stuck, Solaire-san?" Mash asked with concern, looking back up the rock face and frowning at it.

"Well...Not in the way you would understand it." The man replied with a small shrug "It would be better if I showed you." he turned away from them and gestured further along the small path they were on. The Chaldeans looked at eachother before they shrugged and followed after the knight.

"Should probably let Gwyndolin know what happened." Ritsuka muttered to themselves.

"And then you clasp hands and looking longingly into their eyes." Artemis exclaimed with a faint blush on her cheeks "After that is done...you can finally...interlock fingers."

Gwyndolin nodded his head, hastily scribbling down notes while Orion rolled his small bear eyes at them. "...I know you have only done this to distract me from my brother." he eventually spoke to the pair of them in a soft tone "...I appreciate it."

"I'd say this is some pretty important stuff." Orion pointed out before he let out a sigh "Although what you're learning is a little...tame?"

"Tame?" Gwyndolin parroted "I am finding Lady Artemis information to be most valuable...certainly better than Gwyne-…" he cut himself off "Better than another source of information regarding physical matters."

"Really?" Artemis blinked and looked at him in slight confusion "What did they tell you?"

"They didn't tell me anything." The God huffed "They just gave me a book which contained diagrams of two people in different positions."

"...Don't know." Orion shrugged "Sounds pretty useful to me." he went on with a small chuckle.

"It isn't when you don't know anything about physical relationships." Gwyndolin scoffed "I couldn't even find a partner!" they exclaimed, the snake heads raising themselves above the table and looking at Orion "Who would want to lay with me!?"

"I mean…" Orion shrugged "Probably someone's fetish."

"Snake heads?"

"...Could try your luck with the Gorgon?" He suggested with a slight wince "...Although they are a monster so…"

"Hmph...likely makes two of us." He mumbled "Regardless-"

"Gwyndolin? It's Ritsuka...listen we ran into Patches."

"Excellent!" Gwyndolin replied "We can be done with this fiasco and doll out justice."

"Y-yeah...listen...about that…."

"What?"

"...He um...well…"

Ritsuka cringed in discomfort, earning a brief look of concern from Mash. His expression remained tense for a few more moments before he let out a sigh.

"Is something wrong, Senpai?" The shielder asked with a worried tone of voice, Ritsuka let out a nervous chuckle in response.

"Gwyndolin had some...uh...choice words."

"Oh?" Ash sounded very disinterested "How wonderful."

"Ah, still travelling with the Lord of the Moon then?" Solaire called back to them "You have a great many strange friends about you, young Ritsuka!" the Knight let out a jolly laugh as he finished his sentence.

"Y-yeah...real menagerie." The Master responded with a sigh "Where are we going?"

"Just up ahead." Solaire replied. The group had long since moved into a tunnel as they followed the Sun Knight. Although that was mainly because their options were somewhat limited when it came to escape.

Solaire led them through the tunnel system, the group eventually coming upon a literal light at the end of the tunnel as they moved into a chasm where the top was exposed to the elements. The group looked up to see the stars shining down on them.

"Is this the way out?"

"It could be." Solaire replied distantly, then pointed further down "But look."

Ritsuka followed the man's finger and blanched.

In the centre of the cave were a pair of large multipart animals.

"Chimera!?" Mash hissed in shock, staring at them with wide eyes, she scanned the rest of the cavern before they fell on something "Look Senpai!" she whisper shouted at him "Our supplies!"

Ritsuka focused on what she had spotted and, sure enough, he quickly caught sight of nearly a dozen crates with the Chaldea logo stapled onto them. The issue was the two large lion headed, scorpion tailed, winged mammals in the same room as them.

"I recognised the image from a distance and figured you might be along." Solaire went on "I had hoped to reclaim them for you but, in truth, I do not have the energy to fight two of those beasts and win."

Ritsuka stared at the supplies with a frown "Wait a second, how did they even get down here? I thought the Patches guy stole them?"

"Patches?" Solaire tilted his head "These supplies have been here longer than myself and Patches."

That threw everyone for a loop.

"Ummm...what?" Ritsuka blinked at the man "Run that by me again?"

"Despite whatever you might believe, Patches has only been here a little over a day. I was there when he was summoned." Solaire shrugged "We went our separate ways but I had already come across this place."

"How did you come across this place?"

"...Well...the...um...Good Sir Patches told me there might be treasure." Solaire fidgeted on the spot "I was a little curious as to what manner of goods were present on another world but it seems my curiosity got the better of me."

"You don't sound that mad."

"Well...considering he didn't stab me in the back first, I cannot truly complain too greatly." Solaire replied with a wry tone of voice "I believe the expression is 'it could have been worse'?"

"Something like that." Ash sighed, shaking his head as he walked back the others to the edge of the drop into the centre of the chasm. Staring across towards the pair of Chimera sleeping near the boxes "...the true culprit of our thief aside, what we need to do is reclaim our missing supplies."

"Yeah…" Ritsuka nodded his head "Yeah! Then once we get them we can catch up with that Patches guy!"

"I agree, Senpai." Mash nodded her head with a determined expression "I have several scolding remarks which I feel as though I should deliver to him!"

"Right." Ritsuka nodded along with her "I want to give him a piece of my mind."

"Yes well…" Solaire coughed into his hand "Aside from that. We still need to deal with the issue at hand."

"Well, Gwyndolin and Artemis should be along shortly provided nothing goes wrong." Ritsuka replied to them with a small wave of his hand before he froze and cringed "...I just jinxed it, didn't I?"

"Jinxed it?" Solaire and Ash parroted the phrase before looking to each other in equal amounts of non-visible confusion.

"Honestly." Gwyndolin huffed "I allow him the privilege of being in the company of the God of the Darkmoon and he gets tricked like some common fool by a swindler."

"Don't be too hard on him." Artemis replied as she followed by his side "It probably wasn't their fault."

"They are the ones I am contracted to." Gwyndolin replied "I expect a higher degree of intelligence from them." letting out a heavy sigh, the God shook their head "My Darkmoon knights would never fall victim to such a flimsy ruse."

"You had knights?" Artemis blinked at him, then smiled "I had hunters!"

"….The kind who hunted sport, yes?"

"Yep!"

"Well...I'm...certain they were competent?" He responded "No. You are still a Goddess of the Moon. It would be an insult to us if those who prayed for your blessings did not exhibit the highest degree of skill."

"Yeah." Orion snorted "Tell him about the girl with cat ears."

"...The girl with what?" Gwyndolin asked in a slightly caught off guard tone of voice before he noticed something. Pausing, the God stared at the small crate of Chaldean supplies not twelve feet from them underneath the shade of a tree.

Artemis similarly paused when she noticed Gwyndolin's halt, although when she turned towards the direction the God was facing, her already pale skin seemed to turn shades whiter as she caught sight of the individual sat by the box.

The tanned girl with white hair slowly moved her hand into the crate again, when it re-emerged she had another dumpling in her grasp which she slowly moved to her mouth and began eating.

Gwyndolin let out a mildly annoyed sigh as he made his way over to the woman, Artemis noticed his move and walked after him.

"W-wait a moment, this might not be a-"

"You." Gwyndolin came to a halt in front of them. The tanned girl paused, looking up from her meal and fixing her pale red eyes upon the two Moon Gods before her. She gave them a slow blink as she took another bite out of the dumpling. "Thou art partaking in the stolen supplies of mine own residence, wench. Thee shall relinquish those folk to me or shall face the wrath of the Moon."

The girl narrowed her eyes slightly, slowly pushing herself to her feet.

Artemis looked between the two of them with a slightly nervous expression "That might be a-"

"You're going to take away my dumplings?" The girl asked in a barely monotone type voice, the slight edge to it offset how she felt about it.

"Those art not thy dumplings. Those art stolen and I am reclaiming them." Gwyndolin scoffed.

"Dumplings are good civilisation." The girl replied, swallowing the rest of the dumpling whole and being on the verge of glaring at the two "If you're going to take them from me...that makes you a bad civilisation."

AN: Oooooooh.

Picked a bad person to pick on Gwynny. Also he gets to learn about romance from Artemis.

And Patches...That son of a...