Happy Birthday to me and Alexa!!!
Narrator: February 15th the day of Blade and Alexa Zero's birthday even though he has no set birthday he assumes he first existed today.
We see me waking up as Alexa exits my body and lays down beside me
Me: what's up birthday girl?
Alexa: what's up birthday boy?
Me: I can't wait to see what they got us for our 7 zillion and 1 birthday!
Alexa: now you know this is our 999th gazillion birthday day.
Me: shh!! No one has to know I just can't wait to see where we go universe 2, 34, 56, 1, 8, 11 or 269.
Alexa: that's what your really excited for?
Me: ... yeah basically!
Alexa: (sighs) I can't with you (kisses my forehead) you always have to be so damn cute.
Me: hey!! I'm not cute and stop treating me like your the oldest!!!!
Alexa: then stop acting as the youngest cutie.
Me: stop it.
Alexa: no I don't think I will.
Me: grrrr.
As I'm about to jump on her Uzume walks in with a cart with me and Alexa's favorite foods
Uzume: I hope you guys are hungry. Everyone made your favorites.
Uzume brings the cart towards Alexa's side of the bed and she leaves the room as Alexa turns to me
Alexa: do I need to shove this (takes out a dildo) up your ass?
Me: no you don't!
Alexa: (puts the dildo away and pats my head) good boy.
Alexa passes me a plate and she grabs one for herself
Timeskip brought to you by chibi Alexa trying to shove a dildo up chibi me's ass
Me and Alexa are now laying down after eating all that food with my head on her shoulder as see flips through a book about every universe
Alexa: we can travel to universe 2, 5, 6, 10 or 79. Which one you want to go to?
Me: well universe 6 has Saiyans- and didn't I say the universes we-
Alexa: so does universe 7.
Me: so your ignoring me? But anyway universe 6 has planet Sadala.
Alexa: well since you like fighters so much we are going to universe 2.
Me: the universe of love?
Alexa: there's love in that universe?!
Me: I should have kept my mouth shut.
Alexa : oh we're going to universe 2 and I don't care what you say or else I'll shove (pulls out the same dildo) this up your ass!!!!!
Me: fine we can go to universe 2. (Under my breath) I'm going to Remnant.
Alexa: YYYYYAAAAAYYY!!!!!!! We are leaving right now!
Alexa teleports us to universe 2 where the Destroyer of the universe lives as Alexa appears in front of the Destroyer
???: who's there?
Alexa: don't worry it's just me and my brother- (notices I'm not there) where is he?
A portal opens up and they hear my voice
Me: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I hit the ground hard and I'm wearing a black fedora with a black trench coat that both somehow fits despite my hair
Me: I've been falling... for 30 hours!!!!! (Gets to my feet) and I landed on my ribs to!
???: you two have one minute to talk (prepares a hakai) or else.
Me: look I don't care if you hit me with that but you don't hit my-(notices someone else) who's you?
???: me? I'm the-
Me: not you (points to the person that's walking towards us) you.
??? 2: grandpa Blade!!
Me: Zeno?!
???: Grand Zeno?!
Zeno flies towards me and lands in front of me
Me: what are you doing here?
Zeno: I saw you and came to say hi.
Me: without your guards? That's pretty risky.
Zeno: I know but when I saw you I just bursted immediately with joy!!
Me: well I bursted with joy when I saw you to.
Zeno: come on let's play!
I teleports us to his palace
???: so we aren't going to tell him about his-
Alexa: he'll find out eventually.
With me and Zeno
Me: so what do you want to play now?
Zeno: I overheard what you said under your breath so you can go to Remnant I don't care.
Me: yes! Thank you very very much I owe you at least 40,000 times.
Zeno: actually it's 48,501.
Me: let's just say 48,500?
Zeno: ok that's fine!
Me: (chuckles) alright then see ya later kiddo.
Zeno: (waves) bye!
I wave back and teleport away to Remnant
Future Zeno: are going to tell him about his eye or?
Zeno: no he will find out on his own.
Grand Priest: he actually might not because no one has said a thing about it.
With me
Me: ok let's see where should I go first Vale or Mantle? Mantle.
I fly over to Mantle and look up to see Atlas
Me: Schnee.
I fly to Atlas and see how it looks
Me: I can't believe that Atlas is just like any other place on Remnant by its appearance but on the inside it's the most racist for Faunus so now I most destroy it.
I summon Omni and fly down in front of Atlas
Me: time to take you down.
I slash the air taking down most of Atlas but I make sure I leave Atlas academy and the Schnee Manor ok
Me: now which one should I destroy first.
???: neither!
I get blown away by trumpet and get hit by a girl on rollerblades and I see Atlas huntsman and huntresses in training and their whole army
Me: who the hell? What the hell?! Is wrong with you two?!
???: you destroyed most of Atlas and you have to rebuild it.
Me: no I won't.
??? 2: (whispers) what's wrong with his eye?
???: (whispers) it looks like the Schnee Dust Company.
Me: try me!
They see that I took out five Atlas soldiers with one punch
Me: I guess I don't need Omni.
I sheath Omni and sent it to either Kaila or Chrissy
Me: (cocks my right fist and a demonic gauntlet appears) oh yessir!!
I see a hammer about to smash into the side of my head so I grabbed the hammer and yanked it from its owner
Me: nice hammer (throws it in the air) oops sorry Elm.
Elm: how do-
I gave Elm a Superman Punch that hit 5 others
Me: not to shabby (cocks my fist again) let's see what happens now.
Meanwhile
Alexa meet with the Destroyer of the 2nd universe who was Heles and Alexa asked who the three strongest were in her universe and Heles gladly told her angel to get her um Love Maidens? Brianne de Chateau Sanka Ku and Sous Roas so Sour brought them to Alexa and Heles
Back with me
I'm currently slowed down by a male wolf Faunus named Marrow and Elm walks up to me and prepares to arrest me until I vanish behind her
Me: you won't stop me.
I head butt Elm in the back of the head and I sense something's wrong with Alexa
Me: I'll be right back.
I teleport to Alexa and see three girls transforming so I charge up a blast in my gauntlet and fire it at them as the girls and Heles gasp at that while Alexa flies over to me
Alexa: Blade why'd you do that?
Me: I sensed you were getting into a fight. Is there a problem?
Alexa: they we're powering up.
Me: so what?
Brianne: hey you!! (her Sanka and Sous run up to Alexa's side) there is a meaning to every aspect of our transformation ritual you just can't interrupt it!!
Alexa: that's right!
Me: fine you can go back to doing whatever it was your doing.
I teleport back to Remnant and see that everyone I'm fighting was waiting for me
Me: aw my arc reactor heart is touched a little.
I give a jumping clothesline to the nearest Atlas knight robot thing as I get punched in the back and hit with Nunchaku's by the girl with rollerblades on as I get grabbed by some big yellow hands and thrown into the ground pretending to be knocked out as I feel the yellow hands released me and I get circled around
Me: gotcha.
I jump up high into the air as I throw a shockwave grenade sending them all back as I land I get blinded sided by some female shorter than me with electricity following her and get shot by Atlas military
Me: tch. Enough!!!!
I grab the girl by her neck and throw her down to the ground and stomping on as Elm gets close to me with her hammer as she swings I dodged with my hair and eyes turning silver as I dodge her hammer attacks and shot a tiny energy ball at her knocking her down as I dodge and chase after the rollerblade girl
Me: stop run!!
I jump in front of her and step on her foot keeping her in place as I punch her for a good 30 seconds until I had to dodge some kind of fishing pole weapon
Me: the hell?
I jump at him but got knocked back by a four guys who looks the same trumpets
Me: are you kidding?!
I jump at him only to dodge shots mid air by the Atlas army and land behind them
Me: we'll be right back.
With Alexa
Alexa is currently using her form Ultra Love against Ribrianne Kakunsa and Roasie
Alexa (Ultra Love): Pretty Pink Heart Canon!!
Alexa fires pink hearts at Ribrianne Kakunsa and Roasie who dodge them
Back with me
I'm currently dodging Harriet's punches with ease
Harriet: stop dodging!!
Me: ...no I don't think I will.
I grab Harriet's right fist as I pierce into her eyes and I could see fear in her eyes for a split second causing me to smirk at the sight as I hit Harriet with a jab left hook and a right cross knocking Harriet out
Me: come on I want a challenge.
As I said that I suddenly felt two chains wrapped around my left arm and right leg
Me: shit.
I get shocked by a trillion volts of electricity and had more chains wrapping around my body as the volts of electricity doubles every second
Me: grr Annahbelle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I produce my own electricity as I shine sliver
Me: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I use 60% of my true power as Annahbelle tosses me up into the air facing her and I see she is using 100% of her power
Me (60%): I was in the middle of something.
Annahbelle: I know but I trained and I can prove that 60% of your true power is nothing when I'm at full power.
Me (60%): tch fine but we have a time limit of 30 minutes because we have to get back to the estate and finish me and Alexa's birthday.
Annahbelle: fine.
Me: (in my head) why does it smell sweet all of a- no she did not!!!!!!!!!!
Everyone around stops as the whole world turned sliver as I fly closer towards Annahbelle as I bring my right fist up and push my index finger just a little exploding some of her heart as everything resumes and Annahbelle grips her chest
Annahbelle: what did you do?
Me (60%): I destroyed some of your heart.
Annahbelle: what?!
Annahbelle kicks me in the back of the head and hits me with a jab and a left hook as I fly back to think on what I should do and where is that smell coming from?
Annahbelle: come on you can do better.
Me (60%): shut up!!
I put my left hand on top of my right hand and pull the ki off of it and make a black scythe
Alexa: (in my head) are you done playing with Zeno?
Me: (in my head) um...yes.
Alexa: (in my head) oh really?
Me: (in my head) yes really.
Alexa: (in my head) so why don't I see you at his palace?
Me: (in my head) ...hide and seek!
Alexa: (in my head) I tried to find you all over so where are you?
Me: (in my head) I don't know come find me see you bye!
Alexa's voice leaves my head and I jump on top of Annahbelle's chains and run on them and knee her in the face
Me: (whispers) we have to end this quick.
Annahbelle: (whispers) but 20 more minutes I'll beat you.
Me: (whispers) yeah sure sorry.
I grab her by the neck and smash her into the Schnee Manor
Me (60%): Kamehameha!!!!
Before it hits Annahbelle everything freezes like before and I pick up Annahbelle fix all the damage I caused made my Kamehameha disappear and wiped everyone's and everything's memory about this and everything resumes as I teleport back to the estate and power myself and Annahbelle down as I sat her down at the couch and I teleported to Zeno's palace and saw Zeno Future Zeno and the Grand Priest waiting for me
Me: is she back yet?
Grand Priest: nope she is still searching around universe 49 want to see?
Me: hell yeah!
The Grand Priest shows us Alexa currently flying around the center of the universe
Alexa: where is he? I've checked everywhere in this multiverse and I still can't find him. Where could he be?
Me: wait is it almost time?
Grand Priest: well there's 2 minutes left.
Me: ok I'm gonna get going see you guys later.
Zeno and Future Zeno: bye!
Grand Priest: hope to see you soon.
I teleport back to the estate and see that everything I wanted was set up already
Me: and here I thought they need more time.
The front door opens and we see it was by Lincoln
Lincoln: dad your back already?
Me: yeah you guys got done early.
Lincoln: come on in and you can see what we did.
I walk in to see the house is decorated with pink and black
Me: now this is what I like to see. Now where's the cake?
Lynn Sr: did someone say cake?
Lynn Sr brings out the cake that's nearly as tall as Dagon with one side colored with pink frosting and the other with black frosting
Me: yes now just to bring Alexa here.
I summon a copy of her weapon and set it on fire
In universe 51
Alexa: (sniff) what is that? (Sniff) is that-my baby!!!!!!!!
Back at the estate
We all are currently waiting for Alexa to appear as she then appears and starts to choke the hell out of me as everybody gets her off of me
Me: it's fake!!
Alexa: fake?
Me: yeah just a toy.
Alexa: oh... sorry.
Me: it's all good because!
Alexa sees the estate is covered in our colors for our birthday
Alexa: (gasp) for me you shouldn't have.
Me: last year you threw me into-
Alexa: we don't need to talk about that.
Me: but you actually threw me into-
Alexa: let's party!!!
7 hour timeskip brought to you by chibi author being lazy
It's now 1:51 am and I'm on the roof and I look up and see that the stars are in a way that reminds me of the null realm
Me: (chuckles) I guess everything ended perfectly well besides everyone getting drunk on something it was a fun party.
THE END