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Loyalty and Limerence

Part 1

Chapter 9

The Citadel

It was a weird feeling as the Normandy docked at the Citadel a few weeks after the events on Noveria. The Citadel had been his home for years prior to this mission, but the more at home Garrus felt on the Normandy, the less a desire he felt to return to the Citadel. As his feet hit the ground of the dock, he looked around and suddenly remembered how big the Citadel truly was. It suddenly felt alien and foreign, unfathomable and unknowable. Shaking his head, he knew he was being silly. It was his home, afterall.

As he looked around him, he watched as a small stream of Alliance crewmen and soldiers poured out of the Normandy, some with packs slung over a shoulder, most unencumbered. They had exactly 18 hours of shore leave before they had to report back, and most had plans of one sort or another.

"Do you have any plans, Garrus?" He turned to see Commander Shepard coming up behind him, and he shrugged at the question.

"Yeah, I'm going to be meeting up with a few friends from C-Sec for dinner and drinks this evening, catch up on what I've missed. You have a meeting, right?" A pained look crossed Shepard's face for a moment, and he seemed ready to groan, had he been less professional.

"Yes, with Udina. He wanted to go over some information he's received about possible geth attacks and sightings, might give us another place to look for information regarding Saren. We have to be over there in about an hour." The Commander explained, rubbing the back of his neck in discomfort, and Garrus couldn't help but smile at the gesture, so reminiscent of the man's sister. Then, what he'd said caught Garrus' attention.

"'We'? Who else are you bringing?"

"I've roped Kaidan and Jane into coming along, partially for backup, mostly for emotional support." They shared a laugh before sobering and parting with a friendly salute. As Garrus headed toward the elevators, he heard Shepard call out. "Don't forget, drinks later tonight at Flux! The whole team is supposed to be there! Don't party too hard with your pals that you forget!"

"Wouldn't miss it!" Garrus called out as he stepped into the elevator. As he turned around, he caught a glimpse of Jane coming to stand beside her brother. With a smug smile, she tapped the air in front of her right eye where her visor usually sat. Smiling despite himself, he rolled his eyes and sighed in defeat as the elevator doors shut. He refocused his eyes slightly and flicked them to where a specific set of numbers resided in his visor's display

-Kill Count-

[GV: 68]

[JS: 71]

He owed Jane some drinks, according to their little ongoing wager, and he had no doubt that she intended to collect tonight. He had no intention of disappointing her, she had been a formidable adversary and she deserved the reward. He had pushed himself hard to try and beat her, but she always seemed a step ahead of him. However, he felt like he was close to closing the gap, so maybe at their next shore leave she would be the one paying up.

He had plenty of time to kill without many specific plans until dinner, so he figured he should probably stop by his apartment to check on it first. Upon arriving, though, Garrus marveled at how it, too, had become foreign during the weeks since he'd left on the Normandy. He walked around the small flat for a few minutes, checking that everything was as it was left. It was a nice apartment, though small. Space was always at a premium on the Citadel, even on the wards. He wondered what Jane would think of it, particularly given her childhood on the streets.

Pausing, Garrus looked down at a holoframe displaying a photo of his mother, father, and sister from a few years back. Picking it up, he brushed off the light layer of dust that had built up on it. Should he visit his father before he left? He had plenty of time, but after that message he'd sent, Garrus wasn't so sure. What were the chances that a visit wouldn't end in an argument? Probably not great.

-Family's important, I hope you're able to reconcile with him someday.-

Jane's concerned voice echoed through his head, and now received deeper meaning when he reflected upon the information she'd shared about her family, or lack thereof. Sighing, he put the picture down. Maybe today wasn't the best day to see his father, but he would make an attempt to reconcile with him when the mission was over, at least.

An hour later, Garrus was strolling through a nearby shopping district killing time. He had a short list of things he wanted to pick up, for his general comfort and quality of life aboard the Normandy, but mostly he was just looking. Part of him was itching to get back to the Normandy and back on the hunt, but he knew he should try and enjoy his free time while he had it.

Stopping to glance through a shop window, Garrus' eyes landed on a display for a specific omni-tool upgrade. Humming with pleasure, he immediately knew that Jane would be interested, and made a mental note to tell her about it when they all met up later. Checking the price, he winced. He didn't know her budget, but he couldn't imagine an Alliance Lieutenant made enough to make that price tag any less painful. He chuckled as he could almost hear her scoffing and complaining about the price, and wondered idly if she was the sort of person who attempted to haggle down prices.

As he continued on to the next shop, he wondered how the meeting had gone, or was it still in progress? Should he send one or both of them a message? He'd probably hear all about it soon enough. Spirits, he hoped they had a good lead for where to look next. He felt like they were getting close, if only they could make more sense of the visions Shepard kept suffering from. It was a pity Liara couldn't help him more with those. Somehow, they had to get another lead on Saren, and soon. He didn't want to think about what would happen if they didn't. Suddenly, his attention was caught by a few mods in the next store window.

"Hmm, I wonder what her opinion would be on these…"

"Garrus? Hello? Earth to Vakarian, come in?"

"Huh? What?" Garrus' attention snapped back to the three other men sitting around the table. They were waiting for their meal to arrive while they sipped at their drinks, but Garrus' heart just wasn't in it… whatever it was they were talking about. "Oh, sorry. Have a lot on my mind." Honestly, he was wishing he could have sat in on that meeting along with Shepard, Kaidan, and Jane.

"We can see that." Ridgefield pointed out as the other two laughed, and Garrus shrugged. "Your head has been somewhere else since you arrived. What, got a hot date after this?"

"No, nothing like that. It's just the mission I'm on, it's given me a lot to think about." They sobered at that, giving each other meaningful looks before turning back to him. "What?"

"We've been wanting to ask." Chellik started, oddly hesitant for the usually confident turian, "What is this mission you've been on? You're serving on Commander Shepard's ship right?"

"There's been a lot of scuttlebutt, but the whole thing is still pretty hush hush." Ridgefield's voice was a little more subdued as he jumped in. The three glanced at each other before he continued. "But it's not hard to guess, given what Pallin had you investigating before you left. Is Shepard really going after Saren?" Garrus hesitated, glancing between his three friends as they watched him expectantly.

"You know I can't talk about it, not at this point anyway."

"Ah, but your hesitation makes me think that that's it, exactly." Lamont smiled in triumph, leaning back in his chair.

"That's not-"

"Hunting down a rogue Spectre! You must be loving it. You always did have a thing for the action." Ridgefield laughed, taking a sip of his drink.

"I'm not going to talk about the mission, and I will not confirm nor deny what that mission may or may not be." Garrus rolled his eyes, reaching for his own drink. He wasn't even sure why he'd messaged these idiots that he was going to be in town, he shouldn't have expected any different. They were all too nosy for their own good. But they were good friends, and it was good to see them, at the very least.

"Okay, okay. But at least tell us about the girls. I've always had a thing for a woman in uniform." Lamont urged, laughing as Garrus nearly choked on his drink. Ridgefield leaned over and slapped him on the back, joining in.

"Yeah. I hear some of the smaller Alliance ships have unisex showers, you've probably seen all the ladies up close and personal!" Garrus tilted his head in confusion, his mandibles fluttering. He looked at Chellik, who just rolled his eyes and shrugged.

"Well, I don't think I'm really a good authority, as I'm a turian. I don't exactly have a human fetish, so I haven't spent a whole lot of time checking out the human women on this dangerous, important mission." Garrus wondered idly if his childish curiosity about their hair counted as being interested in humans, but decided to keep that embarrassing tidbit to himself.

"Fine, fine. Point taken. You can be such a stick in the mud sometimes." Ridgefield sighed with an affectionate punch to the shoulder.

"Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up."

"Over here!" Garrus saw Ashley frantically waving at him from where she sat next to Wrex, who was still wearing his signature blood-red armour, making the waving superfluous. His eyes, however, locked in on his red headed friend as soon as he stepped foot in the bar. Flux was as energetic as usual, but Jane and the crew members that had shown up thus far stood out amongst the crowds. Making his way over, he nodded in greeting to the group.

Jane lounged comfortably on a couch, Tali perched beside her on one side, Kaidan somewhat stiffly sat on Jane's other side. Wrex occupied half a couch nearby, leaning back comfortably with a vibrantly green drink equipped with a tiny umbrella. He was arguing good naturedly with Ashley, who's cheeks were already flushed thanks to the mostly downed electric blue drink clutched in her fist. Joker chatted with Liara, who sat awkwardly on the edge of her chair, looking a bit as though she were unsure what to do with her hands. Other crew members from the Normandy sat at tables nearby, all drinking and chatting amicably.

"Saved a seat for you! Or maybe it was for John, I don't know!" Jane gestured to a chair on the other side of Tali, and as he went to sit down, he noticed a couple of empty glasses on their table already.

"Started without me, huh?" He chuckled as he sat down and she grinned back at him, her face clearly a little flushed already.

"No worries, I opened a tab for you already." She said with a flippant, vague wave of her hand before picking up her half finished glass, raising it in a salute to him.

"Great, so should I sell my apartment now, or wait till I see the bill?" Garrus joked, leaning back and crossing a leg over one knee. He still felt a bit buzzed from his dinner earlier, but a few more drinks certainly wouldn't hurt.

It wasn't that much longer until Shepard showed up, arriving to a cheerful cry from nearly all the Normandy crew. He smiled good naturedly at the warm welcome, though with more than a little amusement at the inebriated state of some of them. He glanced around for a spot to sit, and Jane patted the small bit of space between herself and Kaidan cheerfully.

"John! Pop a squat, have a drink! Not on me, though, I ain't buying tonight!" She grinned in Garrus' direction, her cheeks even redder now, and he noticed ruefully that she'd already been served another glass. Shepard eyed the spot, not nearly big enough for him, and raised an eyebrow.

"Here, you can have my spot." Kaidan sighed, standing up, and before Shepard could protest, he'd already pulled up another chair. Once they were all situated and drinks had been served, Shepard finally started to relax. Garrus saw his shoulders loosen as he took a deep breath, nearly melting into the couch.

"Did the Council give you trouble?" Garrus asked, sipping at his own drink slowly, enjoying the burn.

"No, I just had a million errands to run and stops to make on my way. It's been a crazy day."

"I still can't believe you didn't punch that al-Jilani woman. Guess that's why you're the Spectre." Jane poked him in the shoulder and Shepard shot her an affectionately irritated glare.

"Don't remind me. It was hard enough being civil while she hung me out to dry on camera. God, what a mess." He brought a hand up to rub his eyes in clear exhaustion.

"I thought you handled it really well, actually. You came across as very professional, while you made her look hostile and petty." Kaidan chimed in, causing Shepard to smile in thanks, though it was unclear if he agreed.

"Thanks, glad you think so. We'll see what happens when it airs."

"What happened?" Garrus asked, curiosity peaked.

"Some super aggressive reporter cornered us before the meeting, threw all sorts of accusations at him." Jane sniffed, lip curled in disgust as she swirled the contents of her amber drink.

"But didn't you say earlier that she was human, too? Why would she attack you guys like that? Aren't you on the same side?" Tali leaned over to ask, clutching her glass with a small pink straw sticking out of it.

"You clearly don't understand humans yet, we treat each other nearly as badly as we treat others." Jane glanced at her before her eyes landed on the other woman's drink. "What is that, water? Why aren't you drinking anything good? We need to get this girl a drink."

"What? No, I'm okay, really! I don't think I sho-" Jane wrapped an arm around the younger quarian's shoulders, leaning into her. Garrus couldn't help but chuckle. While Jane was a friendly person in general once you got to know her, she definitely kept her filters and barriers up to a certain extent. That was clearly not the case at the moment, and it was very entertaining.

"Nonsense! Or, wait… How old are you? Are you too young to drink by quarian laws? Jeez, I hadn't even considered that." Jane pulled up her omni-tool, stared at it blankly for a moment before taking a long sip from her drink. "How old are you, exactly?"

"Old enough!" Tali answered, clearly flustered now. "Okay, okay, but only one!"

"Good enough for me!" Jane cried triumphantly, summoning over a server enthusiastically.

The night continued on in a similar, relaxed manner, everyone enjoying their time without responsibilities and anxiety hanging over them. John got sucked into a conversation with Liara when she came over to talk to him more about the protheans. Kaidan got pulled into a conversation about the Normandy with Joker. Tali, now asleep, was snoring lightly, her head drooped over onto Jane's shoulder. Jane, much less coherent than earlier, was going on about her childhood dream of having a pet, but in a befuddled manner that made it very difficult to follow. Or perhaps Garrus had had too many drinks, too?

"I dunno, like, maybe a fish or something? They're so… majestic, swimming around. And so delicious. Fish is really good. I think maybe we should go get sushi, except that I don't think you could eat that, huh Big Guy? Do you have fish? I mean, like, does Palaven have fish? I can't remember seeing any, but I never went to the beach... Or what about, like, something small and furry? I mean as a pet. Aren't they easy to not kill? Like, rodents and stuff? I'm pretty sure I'd kill it unless it was, like… suuuuuper easy to take care of."

Garrus didn't even have to answer at this point, as she just kept going on in a long monologue. Which was good, as he was starting to lose the train of her conversation as he found himself becoming preoccupied with her eyes. They were so green and so deep and so big! Humans had the biggest eyes… No, maybe salarians did, but theirs were weird. Hers were so bright and big and expressive. Though tonight their usual sharpness was replaced by a glassy look in no small part due to the drinks. He felt like if he leaned in a little closer, he might be able to see himself reflected in them-

"Vakarian!" Garrus' head snapped up, looking around to see Ashley gesturing in his direction, the lack of focus in her eyes betraying her own intoxicated state.

"What?" His voice seemed too loud to his own ears.

"You need, I gotta- We have a question!" Ashley slurred, pointing vaguely in the direction of Wrex, who was sitting quite at his ease, a huge grin on his face. "You're an alien, right?!" She all but yelled.

"Well, I mean, so are you. But yes, I suppose. In a manner of speaking." Garrus drawled, trying to decide if he was amused, insulted, or just drunk.

"Okay, then you need to- I need an answer. Is he full of shit!?" She demanded loudly as she continued to point toward Wrex, and Garrus raised a brow plate in question. She was clearly three sheets to the wind, as Ridgefield always liked to say. Humans really did have a lot of odd sayings.

"Generally? Probably yes. But I think I need to know the question first?"

"Do krogan really have four balls?!" The question was asked so unnecessarily loudly, even given the music, that many sets of eyes at surrounding tables turned to glance their way with a myriad of expressions ranging from amused to disgusted. Wrex burst out laughing, slapping the table and nearly upsetting the empty glasses. Garrus' face deadpanned as his mandibles snapped in close to his face in irritation.

"It's not a good party unless someone exposes themselves in one way or another. Good job, Chief, thanks for taking one for the team!" Jane called out in their direction, raising her empty glass as she laid her head back on the couch sleepily.

"But why would they need four?! Isn't that just, like… overkill?!" Ashley continued, turning back toward the laughing Wrex. "I think you're full of shit, krogan."

"Can we not talk about krogan testicles? Just for a little while?" Garrus groaned, trying to fight the smile from showing by downing the rest of his drink. At least it was never boring with this crew, that was for sure. Tomorrow morning was probably going to be a different sort of interesting, but that was Future Garrus' problem.