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Loyalty and Limerence
Part 1
Chapter 10
Garrus did not wake up with his early alarm the next morning. In fact, he was among the last to pry himself out of his bunk. Though, he had to note, a majority of the crew seemed worse for wear. 'Morning After Shore Leave' was a very real condition amongst soldiers across species, it would seem.
Honestly, he was just happy he'd made it back to his bunk. He and Jane had each thrown one of Tali's arms over their shoulders and hauled her back to the Normandy as she babbled at them in a drunken haze. He honestly didn't remember much more than falling over themselves trying to get to their beds, and looking around, he was happy to see that he was, in fact, in his own bed. Groaning, he rolled out of bed to get washed up. They were scheduled to be leaving the Citadel any time now, and he figured he should probably be getting on with his usual morning duties.
The ship was mercifully quiet as Garrus handled his breakfast and made his way down to the cargo bay. He wasn't particularly surprised to not see Jane there, as she'd been worse than he was last night. Though, now that he thought of it, he hadn't seen her in her bunk this morning, either. Shrugging, he headed over to the Mako. His head felt tight and sore, and work was the last thing he wanted to do, but it wasn't going to do itself. As he set the console to boot up, he bent down to pick up the nearby tool box. As he reached for it, the world seemed to spin and his stomach twisted unhappily. Stumbling forward, his foot made solid contact with the tool box with a loud thud, causing it to skitter a few inches forward before tipping over. Tools clattered on to the floor, the sound of metal on metal echoing painfully throughout the room.
"SHHH, shhh, shhhhhhh!" An irate voice hissed from somewhere nearby, and Garrus slowly made his way around to the other side of the Mako to identify what he already suspected the source to be.
"Good morning, Jane." Garrus said slowly with a slight smile as he laid eyes on the special forces trained infiltrator laying on the floor between the vehicle and the wall, her arm draped over her eyes to protect them from the light.
"Uggghh, no it's not." She grunted, moving her arm just enough to allow her to glare at him with enough venom to murder. "What the hell was that racket? You trying to kill me?"
"Sorry, my bad, knocked something over. Did you spend all night down here? I could have sworn you landed in bed."
"No, no, I slept upstairs. I came down here to get something done, but I just… Need to lay down for a bit. Until the world stops spinning. Or I die, you know, whichever happens first."
"Geez, didn't realize you were such a lightweight, Jane." She glared at him again, this time with less venom and more ruefulness. It was impossible to keep the amusement out of his voice.
"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, Vakarian. Get back to work and leave me to die in peace." She groaned under her breath, rolling over to face the wall.
"Let me know if you need anything, like maybe a glass of water." He managed to keep his voice neutral, but his sub vocals still rang with laughter and mirth as he turned and walked away.
"If you don't stop laughing, I'm going to get up and kick your ass even with a hangover." Jane called out, causing him to freeze where he was, his eyes widening in surprise. Slowly, he turned back and looked down at her.
"You understand turian subvocals?" Garrus asked in bewilderment, and she rolled back over just far enough to glance up at him.
"Not perfectly, no, but I can sometimes get the gist of it. Did some training with turians a few years ago, you quickly learn to pick up when you're being laughed at." She stated dryly, rolling back to face the wall. Garrus quickly tried to think back over the past weeks, trying to determine whether he'd accidentally made a fool of himself in front of her. It was impossible to say, he'd spent so much of his time around her and he'd become so lax about keeping them modulated like he would have around other turians.
"I see, well that's good to know. I'll keep that in mind." He muttered, this time doing his best to keep his sub vocals neutral as well. She chuckled, reading his mind as he turned away, feeling his face flush. She was like a human omni-tool, full of unexpected skills he didn't know about. He couldn't help but wonder what other secrets she was hiding in her arsenal.
After about 30 minutes, Jane finally got to work, but not before downing an entire water bottle and a few pain pills. She looked worse for wear, but not any worse than anyone else that had been drinking the night before, which was most of the ship apparently. As the Normandy started departure protocols, Garrus absently wondered aloud where they were heading next.
"Feros." Jane stated absently as she fiddled with a new omni-tool someone had picked up the day before. Garrus stopped, turning his entire attention to her, along with Wrex and Ashley, who seemed equally interested.
"So Udina did have useful information?" Ashley asked incredulously, and Garrus was not surprised to see that she looked even rougher and more hungover than Jane.
"Apparently, this lead seems pretty solid. Some rundown, would-be colony has been attacked by geth, and it seems legit. We're not sure what the geth want from there, but it must have something to do with the conduit." They spent the rest of the morning speculating together about their next mission on Feros, each hoping that this would be the lead that would bring them to the conduit.
"Feeling any better?" Garrus smirked as Jane sat down next to him later that night, all but slamming her reconstituted rations down on the table next to his own half eaten meal.
"Somewhat. Nothing a little sleep won't fix." She rolled a stiff shoulder leaning forward to tuck into her food. They chatted for a few minutes as they ate, crew members coming and going as they finished their own meals. After a few minutes, Tali came slouching up to stand across the table from them.
"Hey guys, mind if I join you?" She asked listlessly, tossing her tube of dextro nutrient paste onto the table before waiting for their reply. Sitting down, she rested her elbows on the table, holding her head up and she glared down at the tube before her.
"Having a bit of a rough day?" Jane asked, a certain mixture of amusement and empathy in her voice.
"I don't want to talk about it. I have never felt so awful in my life, and I've been shot before. I don't know why I let you talk me into it." Tali moaned, directing a half hearted glare in Jane's direction.
"It's a rite of passage on a human ship, nothing like a day of regret after shore leave." Jane shrugged, a bit of chagrin on her face. Tali only groaned in reply.
"Good evening, crew! How are you all doing?" Shepard walked into the room, his voice ringing with exuberance and energy. He got a somewhat half hearted reply from most of the ship, which only caused him to chuckle.
"Well aren't you chipper, Sir." Jane called out as he grabbed his own rations and started getting his meal ready.
"It's been a productive day! For those of us who aren't laboring under the effects of poor decisions, at least." Shepard's verbal thrust was punctuated by a brow raised in challenge in Jane's direction, who studiously ignored him. "I got my reports all filed and got caught up on a bunch of paperwork I've been putting off, so I count today as a success." He finished as he plopped down in the seat next to Tali, causing her to sit up straight suddenly. "Good evening, Tali. Hope you don't mind if I sit here."
"N-no, not at all, please feel free!" She stuttered, fumbling with the cap to her nutrient paste. Garrus watched in mild amusement and surprise as Tali's discomfort and embarrassment seemed to only grow worse, completely unbeknownst to Shepard. He caught Jane's eye as she glanced at him, also noticing the younger quarian's behavior.
The small group chatted for a few minutes more, but Tali didn't seem to relax as the meal continued. In fact, Garrus decided she seemed most flustered whenever Shepard addressed her. Well, that was interesting. Not entirely surprising, if he was reading her right. She was quite young and impressionable, and Shepard played the gallant rather well.
"Hello, Shepard. Everyone. Would you mind if I sat with you?" Liara said quietly as she joined them with her own meal, standing behind the seat on Shepard's other side.
"Of course, Liara, please." Shepard gestured to the seat, and Liara quickly slipped into it with a small smile. She quickly engaged him in conversation, and Garrus couldn't tell if Tali was relieved or annoyed at the reprieve from Shepard's notice. Though, he had to admit, he was starting to suspect the latter based on the light flush of pleasure creeping up Liara's cheeks as she chatted with the Commander.
At the sound of a sigh, Garrus looked to Jane who was leaning back in her chair, arms crossed, her eyebrow raised in some combination of exasperation and amusement. She glanced at him and shrugged as if to say 'what can you do?' and he chuckled. Shepard seemed completely at ease and totally oblivious to the two younger women's feelings. If Shepard wasn't careful, he was going to be fighting half the crew off his doorstep. Somehow, though, he got the feeling that Shepard might subscribe to the Alliance anti-fraternization regulations, so they might walk away disappointed. Only time would tell.
Garrus smiled to himself as he realized how at home and at ease he felt with this crew, regardless of their species. He'd never been the best turian, he supposed this experience amongst so many humans was probably only exacerbating that problem. But they truly were starting to feel like a family now. After a moment, though, the ease started to flee as another realization set in. He had served as a soldier long enough to understand the risk and danger they put themselves in every time they set out on a mission. Particularly on high stakes missions such as theirs. Soldiers put their lives on the line everyday, it was part of the job. His eyes drifted back to the woman sitting next to him, the human who had become his best friend on this ship.
The closer they grew as a team, the more difficult it would become if they were to lose someone on the mission, an eventuality that they would be very lucky to dodge if they could. He tried to shake the feeling as he glanced at the team members around him, doing his best to keep in mind their exceptional skills and abilities. Taking a deep, calming breath, Garrus looked at the man across the table from himself. If anyone could get them all out alive, it was Shepard.
The days passed on in their usual fashion as they neared the colony world of Feros. They were due to arrive in about 12 hours, and Garrus would have been lying if he said he wasn't a little anxious about what they were going to find. Their last mission on Noveria had turned into quite the shitstorm even though it had seemed to start simply enough. He'd tried reading what he could find about this planet, but there wasn't much to learn.
By the time evening rolled around, Garrus felt his pre-mission nerves prickling beneath his plates. Unable to sit and chat up in the mess, he was trying to keep himself from pacing down in the cargo bay by busying his hands with the Mako. It didn't need any work at the moment, having sat unused for the past week, and wasn't even currently due for any maintenance. Sighing, he fiddled with the controls, trying to see if he could finagle the heads up display to play a little nicer with the targeting algorithm, but wasn't having much luck.
What were they going to find on Feros? Would it really lead them to the conduit? And was the conduit really going to help them catch Saren? Had Saren already come and gone?
"What are you up to, Garrus? Still at work? Is it giving you any trouble?" Garrus glanced down from where he sat in the driver's seat to see Shepard looking up at him with concern written across his face.
"No, it's fine. I was just trying to find something to keep busy." Garrus jumped down out of the vehicle, dusting off his hands as he walked over to the other man. "Commander. I… What can I do for you?" Shepard must have noticed the anxiety in his voice, because the concern on his face only grew more pronounced.
"Something bothering you?" Garrus considered the question, but after a moment, he decided honesty was the best route. Shepard's open countenance and genuine concern put people at ease, and Garrus was no exception.
"It's Saren. I'm starting to wonder if we'll ever find him." He found himself shifting his weight from side to side, his nervous energy making it impossible to stand still. "He's always one step ahead of us. And he's got those damn geth."
"We're getting close, Garrus. We'll find him." Shepard's voice was calm and controlled as usual, always such a pillar of stability. Garrus would be lying if he said he didn't find his confidence and self assurance comforting.
"I wish I had your confidence." Suddenly, he was back on Noveria, deep within the research facility, clutching a gasping Jane, watching Liara screaming for her dying mother. He thought back to his investigation and all the loose threads that lead back to the rogue turian Spectre. "I just can't stand the thought of him getting away with everything he's done." Taking a calming breath, he focused back on the Commander. "I know you're doing everything you can. And if anyone can catch him, it's you, but… If there's anything else I can do to help. Anything. Just tell me what you want me to do and I'll do it." The words were out of him in a rush before he could really process what he was saying.
"I understand your concern, but we will find him. Just make sure you're ready to go when we do." The finality and resolution in the man's words did a lot to soothe Garrus' nerves, and after a steading breath, he smiled.
"Yes, Sir. You can count on me." Garrus could hear the difference in his own voice, stronger and more assured now. It had been a while since he'd served under a man who could inspire so much confidence with so few words. "Thanks for hearing me out. I appreciate it." They continued to talk about Saren after that, discussing what outcome Shepard thought appropriate for Saren. But through all of it, Garrus only felt his own determination and certainty grow that if anyone could do this, it was Shepard. He was proud to be serving under him and among this crew. He had had his world views so completely turned on their head the past few weeks, and he knew that there was nowhere else he'd rather be right now.