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Loyalty and Limerence
Part 2
Chapter 27
The Normandy SR2
It was nearly a full day cycle until Garrus got the message that Jane had woken up. He wasn't honestly surprised she'd slept that long given how much blood she'd lost and how little sleep she'd been running on, but that didn't make the wait any easier.
Shepard was also notified, and arrived at the medbay at the same time as himself. They entered together to find Jane arguing with Chakwas as she tried to sit up.
"Jane, I'm so glad you're alright." Shepard stated as he strode toward her, only limping slightly at this point, "You should lay down and rest, I'm with Chakwas on this one. You were very badly injured." Jane seemed to relax slightly at the sight of her brother before her, whole and hale.
"I'm glad you're okay, too, John. I'm assuming that we made it through the relay on time and this isn't the afterlife?" She tried joking, but the attempt was strained and halfhearted.
"Yeah, we made it. All thanks to you." Shepard stopped by her side, and Garrus lingered a little ways back, giving them space. "I owe you for that one, Jane. I don't know what would have happened without you." Jane looked away as she murmured denials and dismissals of the claims, but Shepard continued to insist.
"What about the colonists?" Jane asked after a minute, and Shepard visibly stiffened.
"There's no official word yet, but the system appears to have been destroyed." He stated, his voice low and somber.
"I see." Jane replied as she looked up toward the ceiling, her voice flat and empty. "I guess the Alliance wants answers."
"Don't worry about any of that." Shepard stated quickly, and he continued before she could do more than open her mouth, "I'm going to talk to Hackett, we'll take care of it. You just focus on recovering." Jane looked back at him, wincing as she sat up on her elbows.
"John, I don't think-"
"Thank you for coming for me, you most likely saved my life and ensured we were able to delay the Reaper's invasion." He took a step closer and leaned forward to press a quick kiss on his sister's forehead, much to her surprise. "Rest up, we'll be at the Citadel soon enough and we can talk more about it then." With that, he turned and left.
Garrus blinked at Shepard's sudden retreat, and he could see the confusion written across the two women's features as well. Shepard had been understandably busy and distant since their escape from the Bahak system, but it still seemed odd to see him leave so suddenly.
Jane's attention shifted to him, and he took a moment to really look at her. She still seemed exhausted, her eyes dark and deep set. Her face was pale, though better than she'd looked the day before.
"Garrus." She smiled weakly before flopping back down on the bed, bringing up her hands to rub at her eyes tiredly. He closed the space between them, coming to stand beside her bed.
"If you promise not to get up or move about, Jane, I'll give you both some privacy." Chakwas smiled as she raised an eyebrow. Jane turned her head and shot the other woman a glare before rolling her eyes in turn.
"Fine, I won't get up. If you insist."
"I do." Chakwas stated dryly before turning and leaving, chuckling as she palmed the door controls. As the doors shut, Garrus turned back to Jane.
"You must hate me right now." Jane stated bleakly as her eyes rested on him, and he felt his mandibles flick.
"I don't hate you," He replied after a beat, "I could never hate you." She smiled at that, but he tilted his head, raising his browplates in consideration, his mandibles flicking in irritation, "I'm… not happy about what you did, though." He supposed that was an understatement, but all his negative feelings regarding her choice to leave without him were tempered by his relief and happiness that she'd returned alive.
"I shouldn't have left without telling you. I'm sorry." Her voice was quiet and earnest, and she shut her eyes as though struggling with an upwell of emotions.
"No," Garrus stated sharply, "You shouldn't have." Her eyes opened and she looked up at him with remorse, and he felt his expression soften. "Shepard told me what happened. I don't agree with what you did, with what either of you did. You shouldn't have gone off alone without support or without telling us." He sighed, looking away, "But I'm trying to be understanding."
"I'm so, so sorry, Garrus." His eyes returned to her, and she reached hesitantly for his hand. He interwove their fingers, relishing the cool, soft feeling of her skin against his. "I shouldn't have left without telling you. I was just so caught up in it, and so exhausted and worried. I wasn't thinking straight."
"I'm disappointed. I thought we were partners, I thought we were supposed to watch each other's backs." He murmured as his other hand came up to clasp their interwoven hands, gently stroking the top of hers.
"I know. I'm sorry." She repeated morosely, then sighed. "I had been trying to respect John's desire to keep the mission classified. But I also knew I had to find him. I couldn't leave him…" She trailed off, and Garrus nodded slowly.
"I know. It was harebrained and impulsive, but given what happened, I really can't stay mad at you." After a moment, he chanced a smile, "We'll get past this. And honestly, I'm just happy you're okay."
Jane smiled softly up at him, though it seemed forced. He leaned forward to brush his forehead gently against hers, and her free hand came up to cup his face.
"I was so scared I'd never see you again. I thought we would need to leave you behind, I thought I was going to lose you." Garrus whispered, not bothering to hide the sorrow in his subvocals.
"Garrus, I-" Her voice hitched, and he pulled back, noticing the brightness in her eyes as she looked away, "Three hundred thousand batarians are dead because of me." Her voice was tight, higher than usual, and he shook his head.
"Doing what you guys did was the only way to delay the Reaper invasion. Their sacrifice may save millions, if not billions of lives. You did what had to be done." She said nothing to this, her eyes remaining fixed on the far wall as she swallowed. "Besides, you weren't the one who came up with the plan to destroy the relay."
"I was the one who hit the button." She stated numbly, all emotion drained from her voice, her eyes suddenly dull, haunted. "Those people, they're dead because of me. Because of my decision. I killed them."
"If you hadn't, then the Reapers would have shortly after, followed by many more. They would have gone straight to Earth, Palaven, Thessia. It was the only choice you could have made." His voice was gentle yet firm, but Jane seemed immovable in her guilt.
"I know. And I'd make the decision over again. But I never wanted to kill innocent people, batarian or otherwise." She looked back at him, but she seemed more to be looking through him, her eyes haunted by the memory, "We tried to warn them, but we weren't able to."
"You did the right thing." Her eyes seemed to refocus on him as he spoke, and he could see the tiredness in them, "You're not some kind of monster, you're not-"
"I'm no better than Vasir. I'm worse, even. She said she got her hands dirty to protect the galaxy, but I don't think this is what she had in mind."
"This is exactly what she meant." Garrus interjected forcibly, softening his voice as he continued, "You sacrificed the few so that the many might have a chance at life. If that's not what Vasir meant, then I don't know what is." Jane blinked at him, seeming to consider his words. But then she yawned, her eyelids fluttering. "You still need rest. How about you go back to sleep? I'll be right here, watching your six."
"Okay." She smiled at him drowsily, and he smiled back.
"I'm not taking my eyes off you. No disappearing on me this time." He stated, only half in jest, and she laughed as her eyes began to close again.
"Wouldn't dream of it."
Jane slept on and off for a while after that, but Garrus knew that to be perfectly normal. Shepard came to visit her a few times, and though he always seemed genuinely happy to see her, he never stayed long.
Part of that was probably due to the fact that Jane used his visits to pepper him with questions about the fallout resulting from what happened in the Bahak system. Shepard seemed reluctant to discuss the topic with her, and Garrus didn't need to have years of experience in reading human facial expressions to see he was worried.
"We're almost at the Citadel. We can talk about it more then." With that, he gave her shoulder one last squeeze and left the medbay.
"There's something he's not telling me." Jane grumbled as she spun herself around to dangle her legs off the side of the bed. Garrus was pleased to see she was recovering, both from her minor concussion and from the bullet wound.
"I think you're right." He agreed, watching through the medbay's windows as Shepard disappeared into Miranda's office.
"I'm worried there's going to be major political backlash. Three hundred thousand are dead," She leaned forward to rest her elbows on her knees, pressing her face into the palms of her hands, "The batarians are going to be out for blood."
"I know, but the Council and the Alliance will have both your backs." She pulled her hands away just enough to raise an eyebrow up at him.
"Do you honestly believe that?"
"Can't you at least let me pretend to be an optimist? I'm really trying here." She let loose a soft snort of laughter as she let her hands drop.
"Yeah, okay. Enjoy your little foray into optimism." Jane chuckled before flopping back down on the bed. "Wake me up when we get there."
Sitting himself down in the nearby chair, Garrus yawned as he nodded, "Sure thing."
"You were supposed to wake me up, Big Guy." Garrus' eyes popped open and he groaned before looking up to see Jane glaring down at him in mock irritation before tugging her shirt on over her head. She smiled as he stretched.
"Sorry about that, I must have dozed off." He said drowsily as he stood.
"Can't imagine how." She stated dryly, "You looked really uncomfy. You know you could have taken a nap on one of the beds, right? Instead of a cold, hard chair."
"Where are you going? Did Chakwas clear you to leave?" He asked with a sneaking suspicion that he already knew the answer.
"Not yet, but I'm perfectly fine enough to present myself to the headsman." She stated with wry amusement, and Garrus felt alarm bells go off in his head at the words.
"Wait, hold up," He held up a hand, all vestiges of sleep vanishing, "Surely the Alliance doesn't allow capital punishment? It's against the law in Council space, and-"
"Whoa there, I was just joking. You know, a little gallows humor." She grinned, but the smile melted when she noticed he was still staring at her in concern. "Relax, they're not going to kill me. But my actions resulted in the death of… a lot of people. There's going to be an inquiry at the very least, if not a trial. I need to be prepared, and the sooner we present the facts surrounding what happened, the better our chances of heading this off before it gets ugly."
"What, are you suggesting they would arrest you?" Garrus bristled and she shrugged, tugging on one of her boots. "But you did the right thing, and Shepard was just as much a part of this, if not more. Would they arrest him, too? After everything you both have done to help this galaxy?" He could feel and hear the anger and outrage bubbling up, but he knew deep down that it stemmed from selfish fear. Fear of having her ripped away from him.
"If it helps keep the peace, then I don't see what other option I have besides turning myself in." She stated simply as she pulled on her last boot, "The last thing we need is outright war as the Reapers prepare to invade. We delayed them, but they're still coming. The galaxy needs to put up a unified front if we're going to stand a chance."
Garrus logically knew she was right, her words made sense. And yet, he was so furious at the unfairness, the injustice of it all, he wanted to scream. Her relaxed nonchalance about it just made him more pissed, as though she had no cares in the world.
"Why are you not more upset about this? Screw the batarians!" He snapped angrily with a sweeping gesture, "How can you just roll over like this? You're just going to give yourself up? We need you, Shepard needs you, I need you, and you don't even care, you're just going to-"
"Shut. Up." Jane's voice was as cold and hard as steel, and when she slowly turned to face him, her narrowed eyes nailed him in place, "I will do what I need to do to ensure the rest of you can prepare for the Reapers. John is the best bet we have at survival, and you know that. Don't you dare accuse me of not caring. And I killed three hundred thousand people, Garrus." Her voice shook a little, and she paused to take a deep, steadying breath, "I don't even know how to start processing that."
Garrus felt himself deflate at the defeated look on her face before she turned away from him. She brought a shaking hand up to run through her hair as she took another steadying breath. After another moment, he closed the distance between them, wrapping his arms around her and bringing his face down to rest against her neck and shoulder.
"I know. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said any of that. I'm just scared."
"Me too." Jane whispered, her hands coming up to rest upon his.
"I know you care, and I know you'll do what you think is right. That's part of what I love about you." He inhaled, savoring the familiar smell of her, attempting to commit it to memory. "But please. There must be another way, something else we can do. Please don't just turn yourself in."
"I can't make any promises, Garrus. I need to ensure John is free to rally the galaxy against the Reapers. If that means taking all the blame for what happened, then I'll do it." She spun in his arms to face him, her hands coming up to rest on his chest. "If the Alliance does choose to arrest me, they can't hold me forever. Especially given my Spectre status. They'll just need to look like they're doing something about what happened. You'll see me again."
"You'd better hope so, or else I'm going in after you." Garrus stated with a forced smile, humor in his voice that wasn't reflected in his subvocals. She chuckled regardless, her hands coming up to wrap around his neck, pulling him down for a kiss.
What started as a sweet, gentle kiss slowly deepened, burning desperation taking over as they left their other senses behind, drowning in each other. Soon, nothing existed outside the two of them, and the heated press of their bodies. Just as slowly as it built, the heat dissipated, their movements softening and cooling until they broke apart, and Garrus leaned his forehead against Jane's, nuzzling her gently.
The door whooshed open, but Garrus was tempted to ignore it, desperate to hold her for just a moment longer.
"Oh. Ah, sorry to, er, interrupt, guys." Shepard stated awkwardly before coughing. They pulled apart and turned to see the Commander glancing away, a hand brought up to rub the back of his neck uncomfortably.
"It's okay, don't worry about it." Jane stated as she took a half step away, her fingers squeezing Garrus' before letting go. "Interruptions happen surprisingly often around here." Shepard came further into the room before stopping and looking Jane up and down.
"You're dressed." He stated bluntly, "Going somewhere?" His voice hinted at dryness, and Jane glared at him.
"I sort of assumed the Alliance and the Council were going to have something to say to us, so I took the liberty of getting ready to go." She replied just as dryly.
"Don't worry about it, I handled it." Shepard stated, his voice carefully neutral.
"What do you mean?" Jane's eyes narrowed in confused suspicion. Shepard hesitated a half heartbeat too long before replying.
"I just spoke to Hackett. He just left, in fact."
"Wait, he came in person?"
"Yeah, he figured the situation warranted it."
"Why didn't you wake me up?" Jane asked sharply, and Shepard glanced at the bed as he shrugged.
"You needed your rest. Like I said, I handled it." He seemed reluctant to explain further, but Jane stared him down as she crossed her arms, and he eventually continued, "I'm going to be turning myself in when we get back to Earth to stand trial for what happened in the Bahak system.
"Wait, what?" Jane exclaimed with incredulity, her eyes widening as her hands fell to her sides in open shock.
"I left you out of most of my report, there won't be any repercussions for you. I took full responsibility." Shepard stated gravely, bracing himself for the storm both he and Garrus could see brewing.
"Why the fuck would you do that?" Jane exploded as she took an angry step in her brother's direction, "The galaxy needs you, you can't just rot away in an Earth side prison!" She jabbed an angry finger into Shepard's chest, but he stood immovable as she continued, "Why would you be so stupid, so shortsighted, so selfish?"
Shepard's control snapped, his anger breaking past his carefully constructed facade. Garrus wasn't sure he'd ever seen the usually calm and collected man turn so much anger on his sister before.
"Selfish? I'm never allowed to be selfish! But you know what? Maybe Iwant to be selfish this time! You're always the one protecting me, always supporting me, always taking care of me." His righteous fury seemed to dwindle as quickly as it appeared, his voice softening as he continued, "Just this once, let me take care of my baby sister. Please, Jane. Let me take the fall so that I can protect you. Let me be selfish. Just this once."
Jane and Shepard stood staring each other down for what felt like ages until finally Jane stepped forward and wrapped her arms around his middle, pressing her face into his shoulder as his arms wrapped around her.
"Why are you choosing my freedom over the galaxy? When the Reapers come, we're not going to be ready, not without you." She murmured into him, just loud enough for Garrus to make out where he stood.
"Don't undersell yourself." Shepard said soothingly, "You're more capable than you think. I have faith in you to do what needs to be done in my stead." He looked up and smiled at Garrus before adding, "Plus, you're not alone. We have a whole team of capable people who can rally all the species together to prepare for the Reapers. Garrus, I'm sure you'll be able to help get the turians mobilized, and I know Tali is already making plans to speak to the admiralty board when she rejoins her people. We're not without allies."
Jane stepped back slowly, nodding her head reluctantly, "Yeah, I know. I don't like this, though, John. After everything you've done, you deserve better." Garrus couldn't help but smile at that, remembering his conversation with her just minutes earlier. He felt his own selfish relief that Shepard had taken the fall, even if he was ashamed to admit it. He hated himself a little for even harboring the thought.
"It's not about me. Don't worry, though. I'll be okay." Shepard gripped both her shoulders, smiling fondly at her, "At worst, I spend a few weeks twiddling my thumbs until the Council raises a stink about them holding one of their operatives." He echoed Jane's earlier sentiments, which finally made Jane crack a small, crooked smile.
"You, sitting around on your ass doing nothing? That's pretty much a death sentence for you. You don't handle being bored well, you fucking workaholic."
"You're one to talk." Garrus cut in, "If I had a credit for every time I've caught you pacing the ship looking for things to do, I wouldn't be quite so broke."
They shared a laugh, but soon after they were interrupted by Chakwas who, upon seeing Jane out of bed and dressed, ordered everyone out so that she could give her a proper examination before releasing her. Garrus finally agreed to leave, but when he turned to inquire more about Shepard's plans to turn himself in, he found the other man already gone.
The next few days passed in a haze of confusion and anxiety as the media began picking apart what little was known by the general public regarding the events in the Bahak system. Garrus did his best to keep Jane away from the media coverage, much of which was not kind nor fair to Shepard given how little they actually knew. In addition to her hair-trigger temper regarding the topic, she also seemed prone to fall into dissociative episodes on occasion when she dwelt on it too much.
Shepard planned on taking the Normandy to Earth to turn it and himself in soon, and he'd given the crew the option to remain on the Citadel if they didn't want to join him. Given that most of the crew had been Cerberus prior to their split, a majority of them ended up choosing to stay behind instead of risking being arrested as well. Some notable exceptions included Ken and Gabby, interestingly, who'd decided to remain with Shepard and the Normandy. When asked, they expressed a desire to ensure nothing went wrong with the ship during the trip to Earth, not wanting Shepard to have to deal with it alone. Garrus found that rather touching, and Jane gave both of them a firm hug.
Jacob and Miranda both decided to remain on the Citadel. Garrus thought it prudent on both their parts given their past association with Cerberus, and they both promised to do what they could to help prepare for the Reapers. What that would be, exactly, was a mystery to Garrus.
Grunt expressed an interest in catching a ride on a freighter heading to Tuchanka, which made sense. He was eager to serve Clan Urdnot, which seemed like a good plan, as Wrex had plans to unify the krogan and that seemed like a good way to prepare for the Reapers. If anyone could manage a feat like that, it would be Wrex. Jane was oddly emotional about parting with Grunt, and Garrus supposed that was due to her bizarre 'older sister', or perhaps 'cool aunt', relationship with the younger krogan. Though the krogan pretended to be unaffected by the parting, he'd happily accepted hugs from both Shepards, and Garrus could see how much he enjoyed them.
Even though Jack had come a long way from the unpredictable, ornery firecracker they'd first brought onboard, she was still among the most angry and disgruntled about Shepard's impending arrest. It'd taken some effort to talk her down from marching into the Alliance HQ on the Citadel and raising hell.
In a surprise turn of events though, Jack admitted, once she calmed down, to being approached by the Alliance regarding a possible job opportunity. Apparently, Anderson had recommended her to a friend of his, and together they suggested she'd be a good candidate to help train biotic youths. Though she claimed to be unsure, everyone could see as plain as day that she was interested in the idea. Given what he knew of her background, it didn't surprise Garrus.
One by one, crew members began leaving the Normandy, securing new positions, lodgings, or passage off the station, and Garrus couldn't help but remember the last time he'd slowly watched their team dissipate. After a few hugs and words of farewell, Tali left to rejoin the Migrant Fleet again to start preparing them for the Reapers. At first he'd been surprised to see that Shepard wasn't among those seeing her off at the airlock, but he supposed they'd said their own goodbyes in the privacy of his quarters beforehand. Saying goodbye was never easy, and under circumstances like this, it was nothing less than painful.
Interestingly, it was Tali who volunteered to help get Legion safely out of Council space. She promised to get it as close to geth controlled space as she possibly could while on her way to rejoin her people. Legion quickly agreed, and they set about devising a plan.
And so, once again, Garrus found himself one of the last remaining crew members aboard the Normandy, dragging his feet as he hesitated. Jane made it clear that she would be seeing her brother back to Earth, stating her intention to submit her testimony on his behalf, in addition to providing the Alliance with the information they'd gathered about the Reapers thus far. She planned to meet with the Council before the Normandy's departure, but besides that, she kept mostly to the ship. Garrus wondered if she harbored a fear that Shepard would leave her behind if she gave him a chance.
In the end, Garrus knew what he had to do. As desperately as he wanted to accompany Jane and Shepard to Earth, he knew he had to see his mother. From what he understood, she was in the process of being transferred to the Citadel to begin the new clinical trial that Mordin had helped get her into. Maybe it would work, maybe it wouldn't, but she seemed to be fading fast, so it might not matter. He needed to spend some time with her and help support his father and sister. After that, well, he supposed he had to see about getting the Hierarchy to listen to reason regarding the Reapers. That definitely couldn't be done from Earth.
Packing up his belongings was hard. He'd dragged his feet, watched everyone else pack and leave, and finally it was his turn. The Normandy was due to depart the next day, and his family should be arriving soon. But the Normandy had been his home for the past few months, and even with everything that had happened, he'd been unbelievably happy there. It was hard to leave. Sure, the beds were too small, the proportions of everything designed for tiny, five fingered humans, the food had been awful, the air too cold. And yet-
"Ah, there you are." Garrus turned and smiled as Jane came into the barracks, a crooked smile on her face.
"Just packing up." He muttered before placing the last of his shirts in his bag. She came to stand beside his bunk, examining his progress.
"Looks like you're just about done."
"Just about." He confirmed as he continued packing the last few things. Jane watched silently until he finished zipping the bag up. He hefted it, testing out the weight, and content with it, put it back down again and turned to face Jane.
They stood looking at each other for a moment, both unsure what to say. In that moment, Garrus realized like a blow to the stomach that he might never see her again. This woman, the woman he loved, was about to walk out of his life, and he might never be able to hold her again. The Reapers could arrive in a few weeks, months, probably not more than a year. They had no way of knowing, but when they did, there was no guarantee what was going to happen. What if one or the other of them died in the initial attack?
Swallowing hard, Garrus stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her, savoring the feel of her arms wrapping around his neck, pulling him closer. He held her tightly, silently willing the galaxy to let him keep her, to not rip her away from him. But he knew it was an impossibility. His head came down to rest on her shoulder, a tightness in the back of his throat.
"This isn't goodbye," Jane muttered into his chest, her voice thick with emotion, "We're going to see each other again. Whatever happens, this isn't forever." There was a solid quality to her words, a conviction that made him pull back slightly to look down at her in wonder.
"How can you be so sure?" He asked, and she smiled up at him despite the slight shimmer at the corner of her eyes.
"Because I won't accept anything less. John and I need you with us when we face the Reapers, and I have faith you'll be there." Garrus felt himself smile as her hands trailed up his neck to cup his face, bringing his head down to press against hers. "There's no Shepards without Vakarian." She leaned forward, pressing a single, long, soft kiss against his mouth plates, "There's no Jane without Garrus."
Bittersweet despair ripped at him at her words, and he kissed her again, fierce and needy as he pulled her even closer. Every place her hands touched, the cold that threatened to engulf him ebbed away. Every inch of her skin that brushed against his was a balm to the ache that threatened to break him. He wanted to hit pause, to stay here with her, to never leave the safety of her arms.
They finally broke apart, their breathing labored, and Jane's lips parted as though she were preparing to say something, but then she hesitated. A moment later, they both heard the whoosh of the barracks door opening. Garrus closed his eyes and growled with frustration. Every fucking time on this goddamn ship.
"Oh, wow, I'm sorry!" A voice squeaked, and Jane turned her head to shoot a deadly glare at the intruder.
"Get the fuck out of here, Jenkins."
"Okay, okay! I'm going! I'm going! Jeez…" The door closed again, and they both sighed. They stood there in each other's arms as the silent moments ticked by, and finally Garrus chuckled.
"Can't we just run away somewhere warm and tropical? Some remote planet where no one will walk in on us for once? Retire and relax on the beach?" He asked jokingly, and Jane laughed, her eyes warm and full of mirth.
"That would be nice. Maybe when all of this is over and we've kicked the Reapers back into whatever black hole they crawled out of." She murmured and Garrus felt something warm in his chest squeeze nearly to the point of pain.
"You know, I much prefer this goodbye to our last one." He laughed as she scowled at him, her face flushing slightly at the memory.
"Well, I set a pretty low bar last time, so that's not really saying much." She grumbled, and a moment later they shared another chuckle. Finally, though, Jane took a step back out of his arms with a weary sigh and a nod of her head. "You ready?"
Garrus nodded as he turned and grabbed his bag. Together, they made their way through the quiet, empty ship to the armory where he grabbed and holstered his weapons. Shepard was standing at his console by the galaxy map when they entered the CIC. He turned when he heard the door open, giving Garrus a sad smile.
"You heading out, Garrus?"
"Yeah, thought it was about time." They both closed the space between them, clasping hands in a firm handshake. Garrus wasn't surprised when he was pulled in for a tight hug by the other man.
"Take care of yourself out there. I probably won't have extranet access, but try to keep in touch. Jane can probably figure out how to sneak me some messages at the very least." They parted and he slapped Garrus' shoulder with a grin.
"I'm sure she's up for the challenge." Garrus added, and they both glanced at Jane, who shrugged with a half smile. Looking back at the Commander, he sobered. "Take care of yourself, Shepard. Don't let them keep you tied up too long, we're going to need you when the Reapers arrive."
"I know." After a little more back and forth, Garrus finally nodded his goodbye, and turned to leave, his bag over his shoulder. Jane followed him to the airlock, and they both slowed as they neared it.
"So." He turned to face her, and she nodded.
"I'll be in touch. As soon as I'm done on Earth, I have some more business I'll need to take care of here on the Citadel. If you're still here at that point…"
"You know how to get a hold of me." Garrus replied with a nod and a smile, silently begging himself not to get his hopes up. But, maybe he'd get the chance to introduce her to his family after all. "Take care, Jane."
"You, too, Garrus." She stepped forward and pressed a kiss to one of his mandibles, one of her hands finding one of his. She remained close as she looked up at him. "I love you." She murmured quietly, and he squeezed her hand lightly.
"I love you, too." With that, she stepped back again, turning her face away slightly as her jaw set. Garrus took that as his sign, and turned to head out the airlock, his heart heavy with an ache very different but every bit as painful as the last time he'd parted with her.
The walk down the jetway to the Citadel's dock seemed to pass in a blur, each step taking him further from the home he knew he'd miss more than a physical part of himself. He'd once heard a sweet human saying, 'home is where the heart is', but he'd never truly understood it till that moment.
As he walked along the dock toward the main concourse, it felt like he was walking through ankle deep water, each step taking more effort than the next. He wanted to turn and run back, beg to be brought along to Earth, screw the Reapers, screw duty–
"Garrus!" His heart felt as though it'd stopped in his chest and he whirled around to see Jane darting out of the jetway at a full sprint. "Catch!" She exclaimed as she came to a skidding stop a few meters away, and he took a confused, hesitant half step in her direction.
"Wha-?" He opened his mouth to ask, but cut himself off as her hand whipped out to throw something. It was all he could do to bring his own hand up to catch whatever it was as it flashed through the air toward him.
Garrus' fingers closed around something small and cool, and when he opened his fingers to inspect it, he felt his breath catch in his throat. Two little pieces of thin metal hanging from a sturdy chain sparkled up at him. He couldn't read the small, round human letters etched into the metal, but even if his visor hadn't translated it for him, he already knew what they'd say.
5923-AC-2826
SHEPARD, J.
O/POS
SYSTEMS ALLIANCE
Jane's old Alliance dog tags. He'd spent so much time aboard the SR1 watching her fiddle with them. He'd noticed that she'd stopped wearing them since they'd been reunited aboard the SR2, but he'd assumed she'd gotten rid of them. He supposed he shouldn't be surprised that she'd held onto them, perhaps she even felt sentimental about them. That didn't explain why she'd tossed them to him, though.
"What're you giving these to me for?" He asked after inspecting them, his head tilted slightly in confusion. Jane smiled as she put her hands firmly on her hips.
"I want you to hold onto them for me." This didn't help his confusion in the least.
"Won't you need them when you get back to Earth?"
"I stopped wearing them when I left the Alliance. From the looks of it, I won't be rejoining them just yet."
"If you're not planning on rejoining the Alliance, why do you still have them?"
"They're important to me." She stated with a single raised brow as though it were the most obvious thing in the galaxy, "The Alliance helped me turn my life around, gave it meaning." She left it at that, and Garrus only felt more bewildered by the moment as he glanced down at the tags in his hand again.
"Then," He began slowly, "Why are you giving them to me?" Her smile seemed to grow wider as she rolled her eyes and crossed her arms.
"I'm not giving them to you, I'm lending them to you. I'm going to want them back eventually." At that, he became even more baffled, and he huffed as he shifted his bag on his shoulder.
"Jane, I don't-"
"So," She continued pointedly, "Don't go dying on me without returning them."
The pieces clicked into place, and realization dawned as it all suddenly made sense. He felt a smile grace his face, his mandibles fluttering involuntarily as he chuckled and looked back down at the dog tags. He bounced them lightly in his hand once or twice before snapping his fingers closed around them, the chain peeking out to dangle between them.
"Ahh, I see. Well, I promise you'll have them back. You have my word, I'll keep them safe."
"Good." Their eyes met and her smile softened. With that, she turned and started confidently back toward the Normandy, her back straight and shoulders loose with a self assurance born of accepting one's path.
"Thank you." Garrus breathed as his fingers squeezed around the dog tags before letting his hand fall to his side. Readjusting his bag, he turned and made his way toward the main concourse, his feet lighter, his back straighter, his convictions surer.
The Reapers were coming, and they all had work to do if they were going to be prepared.
(Note: Thus concludes part 2! Interesting fact, I began writing this story 1 year and 2 days ago! It's wonderful to have reached this far, I had no idea how huge this project was going to become. Thank you to my wonderful beta readers thelordofdarkreunion and Zwober. Thank you to everyone who has given me feedback in the form of reviews, messages, favorites, etc. Thank you to everyone in the Mass Effect Fanfiction Writers Discord. And finally, thank you to all my wonderful readers!
Part 3 will begin in mid February after short break, and will be posted right here as part of this story, not a separate one. If you're interested in continuing with the story as John, Jane, and crew battle the Reapers, please be sure to hit "follow" so that you can be here with the first update for Part 3! I'm so excited!)