Rayna

She was sitting in front of the mirror in her dressing room, her hair stylist finishing up her comb out, when Bucky knocked on the partially open door and walked in. She glanced at him in the mirror.

"You ready to walk?" he asked.

She looked at her stylist. "Looks good," she said with a smile, signaling she was satisfied. She stood up then and leaned towards the mirror as she picked up her earrings, one at a time, and put them in. They were the drapey kind she liked and as she turned her head one way and then the other, she liked the sparkle. She ran her fingers through her hair one last time and then smoothed the sleeveless silver sequin dress down over her hips. The hem hit just below mid-thigh, just long enough that she didn't have to tug at it. She slid her rings on and then her bracelets and finally she turned to look at Bucky, waiting patiently. "I'm ready," she said. She walked over to him and together they headed down the hallway to the stage. She was in Denver and had another 6 weeks or so until the tour ended in Nashville.

"The crowd's buzzing," he said. "Deana is a great opener." Deana Carter was a rising star and actually reminded her a little of herself. It had been exciting to sign her up for the tour.

She smiled. "She is. Good choice." They were approaching the stage and she could feel the energy already. She felt a few butterflies and put her palm on her stomach. She always had a few before a show, but she also knew they'd be gone the minute she stepped out on the stage. Her career was turning into everything she'd ever hoped it would be. Things had really changed with Platinum Sea, and she had to give Liam some credit for that, and then expanded even more with her next album. When she got off the road she was going into the studio for album number 6 and she couldn't wait.

She and Bucky walked up the steps and stood on the side of the stage. Her band was already on stage, ready for her. The first song would be Already Gone, one that always got the crowd to their feet. She bounced a little on her toes, feeling the excitement, drawing in the energy from the crowd already. Bucky handed her a mic and she put her ears in.

"Okay, go be amazing," Bucky said. She looked at him and smiled, then strode out onto the stage, her arms above her head, a big smile on her face, as the band started to play, and the crowd rose to their feet.

She was sitting in her dressing room, her shoes off, rubbing her soles. As usual she thought about how stilettos killed her feet, but then they sure did look great on stage. She closed her eyes for a second, thinking back over the show. It had gone well, the crowd had been great, and she felt worn out, which meant she'd given it her all. She thought back to when she'd first gotten started and how she wondered if she'd ever get to a place where she could headline a tour, have multi-platinum albums, and #1's off every record. She'd won Top Female Vocalist at the ACM's and was nominated for the same honor at the CMA's, which would be coming up in a few weeks. She'd been nominated for her first Grammy – Best Female Country Vocal Performance – but had lost to Alison Krauss. She was feeling like she was approaching the top of her game. She never wanted to assume she'd reached the top, because she felt like there was more to come. But she'd come a long way from that scared teenager standing on the stage at the Bluebird Café.

Thinking about the Bluebird brought up the memory of the man sitting in the back of the room that night. She hadn't thought about him in a while. She'd stopped wondering what had happened to him. The last time she'd seen him had been when he was with Clint Black's band, but she still didn't know his name. So she'd kind of given up on that, thinking it was just one of those stories she'd remember from her career one day. There was a knock on the door then and she looked up to see Bucky.

"Hey there," she said, smiling.

"Great show," he said. "As usual." She laughed softly. "We're ready to head back to the hotel whenever you are."

She nodded. "Thanks, Buck. I'll be out in a few minutes, after I change."

He smiled and backed out of the room, closing the door behind him. Hiring Bucky had been one of the best decisions she'd ever made. He was perfect for her, and they had developed a very close relationship. She relied on him every bit as much as she did Watty. Bucky would always be honest with her, even when it was uncomfortable, but he was also always in her corner. She thought then about her sister's interest in him. The 2 of them had had a flirtatious relationship for a few months – although neither of them had ever struck her as the flirty type – but then it had just seemed to ebb away. As far as she knew there was no bad blood, just maybe a realization that it wasn't a long haul type of thing. She got up then and changed clothes. She put the dress and shoes in a wardrobe bag her team had left for her, then picked up her purse and left. She didn't have an after party that night and she was looking forward to getting in bed and going to sleep.

She and Tandy did a spa vacation after the end of her tour. It had been a while since the sisters had done something like that and she thought they both deserved it. So she had booked them into the Miraval Spa in Arizona for a week of pampering and indulgence. Tandy had given her specific orders. No outdoor bullshit unless it's a pool. So, she had spoken with someone at the resort and created a lovely itinerary for them, no outdoorsy stuff included. Truthfully, she didn't want that either. The pampering and indulgence were enough. They were scheduled for mani/pedi's, massages, facials, and some yoga, which she knew her sister would balk at, but she was going to drag her anyway.

While they shared a charcuterie tray in the spa bistro they got caught up on their lives. "So do you think you might ask your friend Liam to do another album with you?" Tandy asked, a wicked glint in her eyes.

"Ha! For one thing I don't think he would do it. He told me once was enough for hillbilly music and hayrides. And for another, well, no. That was fun for that little bit of time, but he was never in it for the long haul."

Tandy smirked. "Well, then maybe you'd be interested in an old friend of mine."

"Tandy, I don't date boring people."

"He's not boring. He's actually very attractive and quite the man about town. And he's not in the music business so maybe you should give him a try."

She shrugged as she nibbled on a piece of cheese. "I don't know. I mean, I'm going back into rehearsals when we get home to get prepared for going in the studio. Maybe once I'm done with that. Although" – she took another bite of cheese – "I'll be in rehearsals for next year's tour. So maybe after the tour is finished."

Tandy rolled her eyes. "He might not be on the market then."

She laughed. "'On the market'? Is he a piece of produce?"

Her sister looked offended. "He's one of my friends from business school. We worked on a few projects together and he's a really nice guy."

"Why aren't you going out with him?"

Tandy shook her head. "I could never see him that way. But he really is very attractive and he's the kind of guy who would be a great husband and father one day."

She thought about that. She did want to get married one day and have a family. "Well, I'm serious that things are pretty crazy for me right now. But maybe when I have a tour break, I'll consider it. What's his name?"

"Teddy Conrad."

She was nearing the end of rehearsals before going into the studio to record her next album. She had written all but one of the songs, most of them by herself. Her favorite was a song she called Anywhere But Here and she liked the musical picture it painted of feeling free to do whatever she wanted, not having any fear of the future, and taking full advantage of what life had to offer. She was feeling like she was approaching the top of her game and she wanted to celebrate it. She hoped it sounded as good as she thought it would when it was recorded. If so, it would be the lead single off the new record.

She wasn't due at the studio until late afternoon, so she had taken it easy. Slept late, lounged around in her pajamas, and indulged herself in a book she'd recently bought. When her phone rang, she wasn't expecting any kind of bad news, but that's what she got. Harvey quit. Bucky sounded almost as exasperated as she felt. The timing was awful as they were 2 weeks from the start of recording, which left little time to get a new bass player up to speed. It turned out, after Bucky had done some digging, that Harvey had gone off the rails. He had a serious drug and alcohol problem that they'd thought he'd overcome. Harvey had been sober for 3 years. Bucky wasn't sure what had been the tipping point for his relapse, but she was out a bass player, with no certainty that he would return.

"So how quickly can you pull together a list of people for us to vet?" she asked.

"I'm working on it now. I've got a few leads but so far not getting what I'm looking for. Do you want me to see them first and then bring you the best?"

She thought about that for a second. "No, I don't think we have time. Just pull together a group and we'll spend an afternoon auditioning them." She sighed. "Damn it, Buck, I can't believe this. I really thought Harvey had his shit together."

"I did too. I don't know what happened. His girlfriend was the one who contacted me, and she really was kind of closed lipped about it. She sounded unhappy, so I'm guessing it wasn't good."

"Well, we'll do our best, I guess. I hope we can find someone who's a quick study." She sighed. "I hate to do this, but I think we have to postpone everything until we can get someone on board."

"I'll make the calls," Bucky said before they hung up. All the good feelings she'd had that morning had disappeared in a cloud of smoke. Damn it.

Tandy took advantage of the down time and talked her into going out with this Teddy person. She was not at all sure that someone who was an accountant would be a good fit for her. Since her divorce from Jared, she really hadn't had any other relationships. She didn't count Liam as a relationship since it felt more like an inevitable outcome of the creative process and was over when that process was over. She had heard from him when the album went to each platinum level, but it was a more detached type of communication, more of a self-congratulatory thing. She didn't necessarily begrudge him that – he'd been instrumental in the success of that record and in the trajectory she had embarked on afterwards – but it almost felt like they didn't know each other anymore. He'd moved on, both personally and professionally, and she supposed she had as well.

In any case, she'd been a little restless. She'd dated some men, all in the music industry in one way or another, but nothing had really clicked. So when Tandy asked her about going to the Symphony Ball with Teddy, she figured she had nothing to lose. She always enjoyed going to the ball and having a date would be nice for a change. The event was a white tie event and she suspected Teddy would know how to dress for that. Her wardrobe stylist had found a beautiful sea green strapless gown for her. When she altered it, she'd also added some subtle sparkle to the skirt part of the gown. At the last second, she had wondered about the wisdom of taking a blind date to an event such as this one, but it was an important social event for the Wyatts, and she decided to make the best of it. Although she supposed he wasn't technically a blind date since Tandy had at least introduced them at the country club, a place she hated and that her sister had dragged her to for the express purpose of meeting one Teddy Conrad.

So now she stood in front of the mirror in her bathroom putting her jewelry on. Her wardrobe stylist and her hair and makeup people had just left. All she had to do was wait for Teddy to arrive. Then she'd put on her coat and open the door to greet him, and they would be off on that first date Tandy was so thrilled about. They would arrive at the Schermerhorn and join her sister and her father for the festivities. There would be cocktails, then dinner and dancing. Tandy was right – Teddy was very handsome, with a charming smile and eyes that crinkled up when he did. He was well-spoken and polite. Smart. Tandy told her he came from an old money Nashville family that had fallen on hard times financially when Teddy's father's alcoholism ruined them. She wasn't sure how this would go. He'd probably be one of those short relationships.

The doorbell rang and she turned and headed for the front door.

Teddy was nice, she had to admit. Tandy had told her she was too old for bad boys and that fireworks didn't mean long term happiness. She thought her sister was probably right about bad boys, but she didn't think fireworks had to be off the table. Teddy didn't bring much of that though, so she'd learned to adapt. Whenever she thought about her future, she'd always known it would include a family. She'd struggled to imagine a family with Jared and with Liam it had been a ridiculous notion. There was something to be said about being in a relationship with someone who understood her career because they understood the music business. There generally weren't misconceptions about what that meant, but she discovered, with Teddy, that it could be nice to come home and not think about whether her records were selling or how many times radio played her singles or whether her tour was selling well or any of the other things she typically worried about. With Teddy she could go out for a nice dinner and maybe go to the symphony or a ballet or a play. They could go for drinks at one of the hidden bars around Nashville and just talk. He dressed nicely, even when he was casual, and he didn't drink too much, and he was polite and kind. She'd begun to think that her ideas of lovemaking were unattainable, that she'd read too many romance novels. There were rarely fireworks and even those were more like sparklers. Liam had brought fireworks, but he'd also not brought any true intimacy. So she'd had to readjust her ideas around that, which felt vaguely disappointing, but Teddy brought a lot of other positive things to her life, so she accepted it. What she did see with Teddy was the future she'd always wished for. All she had to do was make sure he could handle the realities of her life and career.

She was sitting in the hotel café with Bucky in Tallahassee. It was the 4th stop on her tour. Teddy was upstairs in her room. "How is he?" Bucky asked.

She sighed. Truthfully, she was a little annoyed, but it wasn't really Teddy's fault. "He looks a little green still," she said. "But he's asleep."

"Will he make it tonight?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. I guess we'll see." She sighed again. "I hate this for him. I know he wants to be supportive, but I really think he probably just needs to go back to Nashville. On a plane, not a bus." It turned out that Teddy got car sick on buses, but he was trying to be a trouper by sticking it out for the first week. He had wanted to know more about her career, which she appreciated, but babysitting him was not part of the deal. She tried not to show him how much it irked her that he wouldn't just admit he couldn't do it. Not everyone had the stomach for it, literally or figuratively, and she understood that, but it was not fun taking care of her sick boyfriend.

"So, he's still trying to stick it out?" Bucky looked concerned. He'd offered to get Teddy on a plane but so far Teddy had resisted.

"I guess. He seems so insistent about it, and I don't know why. I certainly wouldn't think any less of him if he decided to go back home. Actually, I'd feel better about it if he did. He's so miserable." She didn't want to say what she really wanted to, that it would be better if he stuck to his lane and let her deal with hers.

She sat back against the seat in the car Edgehill had provided for her. Teddy reached over and took her hand. "Are you nervous?" he asked.

She looked at him and shook her head. "Not really." She smiled. "It's not my first rodeo."

He smiled back. "I guess not." She squeezed his hand gently.

Teddy was so charming and nice. He had a nice smile. He was good looking and looked nice in a suit, like the one he was wearing. In the months since she'd been dating him, he'd grown on her. Tandy was thrilled, her father less so. That had surprised her at first since Teddy seemed like the kind of man Lamar would like but then she realized, over time, that Teddy had integrity, which would have been foreign to her father. And that made her like Teddy more. "I hope you're not too bored," she said. "I know country music isn't exactly your thing."

"It's growing on me. I enjoy watching you perform. In Nashville, that is."

She laughed softly. "I'm sorry the bus thing didn't work out."

"Me too. But now we know." She nodded and then turned to look out the window.

It wasn't dark yet and it was a warm night, so she hadn't had to wear a coat or a drape. They had just passed near the airport and would be at the Grand Ole Opry House shortly. She was only nominated for 1 award – Female Vocalist of the Year. She'd won the ACM version twice, including earlier in the year, but this was the first time she'd been nominated at the CMAs. She had some stiff competition including her friends Pam Tillis and Faith Hill as well as Shania Twain, who was really tearing things up on both the country and pop charts. So she'd actually lied to Teddy when she said she wasn't nervous. She wanted this more than anything she'd ever been nominated for.

They pulled off the highway and made their way towards the Opry House. She grabbed the small silver bag that had lipstick and a credit card in it. She wasn't sure why she'd brought the credit card but figured it was best to be prepared. The bag coordinated with the shiny silver sheath she was wearing. It gleamed and sparkled, and it was the perfect dress. She'd known it as soon as she'd tried it on. Her hair stylist had put her hair up, with tendrils framing her face. Her silver jewelry complemented the dress and it all made her feel beautiful. They pulled up to the entrance and someone opened the door for her.

"Thank you," she said, smiling as she stepped out of the car. She waited on the sidewalk for Teddy to join her. "You look so handsome."

He smiled, his eyes crinkling. "You're stunning." He shook his head. "You dazzle me."

She just smiled and took his arm as they were guided to the red carpet.

Tandy poured them another glass of champagne while she was in the dressing room. Susie, her wardrobe stylist, was helping her with another dress. The Discovery Ball was one of the last major events of the year and she was looking for something unique. Susie had pulled together several gowns but so far she hadn't seen quite what she was looking for. The one she was trying now had some promise. When she saw it hanging up, she wasn't sure. It was an ombre pattern of blue, with the darkest color at the hem to the lightest blue at the neckline. It was fitted from the bodice to the waist area but without a defined waistline. The skirt was not slim but draped beautifully from the waistline area. When she looked in the mirror, she caught her breath.

The gown seemed to swirl around her. She had not noticed the thin film of tulle at first. It covered the entire dress and was seeded with the tiniest of sparkles. The sweetheart neckline framed her cleavage perfectly and the sleeves were long and fitted, with the same tulle sparkle. When she turned to look at the back, she saw that it was open down to the waistline.

"Oh, Rayna, I think this one's perfect," Susie said.

She smiled. "I love it. I don't think I've worn anything this elegant in a long time. Should I go gold or silver on jewelry?"

"You could do either, but I'm kind of leaning towards silver because of the sparkle. And a dark blue heel."

She left the dressing room and walked over towards Tandy. "What do you think?" she asked her sister.

"Oh, sweetheart, you look so beautiful," Tandy said almost breathlessly. "That is stunning." Tandy handed her the glass of champagne. "You'll be the belle of the ball."

She stood in front of the mirror, running her hands over the dress. She'd been feeling restless for a while, feeling like something wasn't quite right without knowing for sure what it was. When she'd had a dream about the mystery man about a week earlier, it had kind of crystallized what she was restless about. She wasn't happy. Not really. She pretended like she was, but she wasn't. And she didn't want to keep doing what she was doing.

"Rayna?" She shifted her eyes in the mirror to her sister, realizing she hadn't been paying attention.

"I'm sorry. What?" she asked.

Tandy smiled. "How are things with Teddy?"

She made a little face and shrugged. "They're fine."

Tandy smiled. "Well, he thinks they're a lot more than fine. He really, really likes you. In fact, I think he sees this as something really serious."

She sighed. She remembered what he'd said at the CMAs. You dazzle me. It had made her uncomfortable, but she'd let it go at the time. "I like him too, Tandy. I'm thinking we're just too different though, you know?"

Tandy frowned. "I thought that was what you wanted. Someone who wasn't just dating you because you're Rayna Jaymes. I mean, yes, he knew who you were, but it's not like he was a super fan or something."

She gave her sister a quick smile. "You were definitely right about that. He's not much of a country music fan, although I'll give him credit for making an effort." She sighed. "He really is very nice, just maybe a little low key for me. I feel like something's missing."

Tandy looked concerned. "Rayna, I think he's going to..."

She closed her eyes. "Don't." She was pretty sure she knew what her sister was going to say. Teddy had already used the love word, although she'd avoided reciprocating. She was afraid he was going to go one step further and that was not something she saw for herself. She opened her eyes and then turned to face her sister. "It's not going to work, Tandy. At least not for me. And it sounds like I need to take care of that sooner rather than later."

She'd taken off the dress and left it behind. Then she'd called Teddy and told him she couldn't go to the ball. Or anything else. She knew she'd broken his heart, but when she'd thought about a future with him she knew it wasn't going to be right. For either of them. She'd felt sad to hurt him but once it was done she'd felt the sense of restlessness lift. There was something else out there for her. Someone else out there for her. She just didn't know when that would happen. But she was sure that one day it would.

Deacon

Vince showed up at the house one afternoon right before Christmas. He was surprised to see him when he opened the door. "Hey," he said. He was holding Maisie on his hip and Vince made one of his silly faces, making the little girl laugh. He stepped back to let his friend enter.

"Having some daddy-daughter time?" he asked, laughing a little.

"Kind of," he said. "I gotta put her down." He walked down the hall and then settled Maisie into her crib. "You sleep good, okay?" he said to her with a smile. She grabbed her stuffed unicorn and snuggled into it. He stood there for a second, then walked out, closing the door behind him, and walking back out to the great room. Vince was sitting on the couch. He noticed the 6-pack of beer on the coffee table.

Vince took one of the beers and held it out to him. "Can you have one?"

He hesitated. Sam wouldn't let him keep booze in the house, although he did have a bottle of whiskey hidden away in one of the cabinets above the fridge. One she couldn't reach and didn't use. One beer wouldn't be a big deal though. "Sure," he said taking the bottle. They opened their bottles and then he sat on the couch. "So what's up?"

"I got big news." His friend was grinning. "I got offered a better gig."

"Really? With who?"

"Rayna Jaymes." He felt like he'd been kicked in the stomach. "You know her?"

His heart was pounding. "Um, no. I mean, yeah, I heard of her, but that's all." He heard a roar in his ears and his mouth suddenly turned dry.

"It was the craziest thing. Out of the blue this guy – her manager, I guess – called and set me up with an audition."

"And she hired you?"

"Well, it officially was her bandleader who hired me, but she was there for the auditions, so she had input. Her old bass player quit – fell off the wagon's what I heard – and she needed someone pretty quick. She was almost done with rehearsals for her next record, so I'm guessing the timing was pretty shitty. Anyway, I'll be working with the band for the next couple weeks to learn her stuff for the record. She had to push back going in the studio a couple weeks."

"What's she like?" It was crazy that Vince was in her band now. He'd actually stopped thinking about her since Maisie was born. There hadn't been time. But now she'd be back on his mind, and he wasn't sure how he felt about that.

"She's cool. Bossy." He laughed. "But the rest of the guys in the band are really loyal to her, so that says something."

He nodded. "Yeah, I guess it does." He tipped up the bottle and drank the rest. Vince pulled out another bottle and held it out to him. After a second, he took it.

He had agreed to go back out on the road with Dwight Yoakam, but he was wondering if it was a good idea. Dwight had a heavy tour schedule, and he would be gone more than he was home and he felt like things at home would suffer. The money was great – much better than studio work – but being away from Sam and Maisie would be hard, especially since he felt like he needed to be there for Sam. She had gotten more comfortable with taking care of Maisie and he'd been glad to see them developing a bond. Maisie was a happy baby, although she was also quite a handful. Once she'd started to walk, she was like a whirling dervish, sometimes hard to keep up with. The good part of it was that as Maisie started developing more of a personality and getting around better, Sam seemed to be feeling more confident. He would miss them both though.

When the bus pulled into Nashville, it was after midnight. They would have 5 days in town before heading back out for another 6 weeks straight. He was ready to sleep in his own bed and get to spend some time with Sam and Maisie. They'd all been doing shots on the bus and he knew he'd had more than he should have. He was pretty good at covering it though so after he got his gear from the bus and got into his truck, he got ready to head home. His head was spinning a bit though and so he turned the a/c lower and turned on the radio. He sat in the truck for a few minutes before he turned on the ignition and slowly made his way out of the parking lot. He hadn't gotten far when he saw the flashing lights behind him and heard the quick blip of the police car's siren.

He was sitting in the holding cell, his head in his hands. He felt grimy and his mouth tasted like puke. He also had a splitting headache. When he had called Sam after he'd been processed into the jail, she had said very little, just that it would be morning before she could get there. He knew she was disappointed and angry and he didn't blame her. This had been the one thing that had worried her the most about him being on the road, he knew. That he'd get back into drinking. Which he had. He needed a hot shower and clean clothes. He also needed some aspirin and at least a nap. He could ill afford the lost time but there was nothing he could do about it.

The door to the holding cell opened. "Claybourne!" a guard called out. He looked up and then he got up from the bench, following the other man out of the cell and down the hall. He felt like crap, something he knew he deserved. He got his belongings and then headed out. At some point he'd have to get his truck, but that would have to wait. When he got to the entry, he saw Sam. She looked angry.

"I'm sorry, baby," he said as he approached. She just held her hand up and shook her head. They walked out to the parking lot. The sun was bright and hot, and it made him feel worse. When they got in the car, he leaned his head back against the headrest and closed his eyes. They'd been on the road a few minutes when he opened his eyes and forced himself to look over at her. "I really am sorry," he said again.

After a moment she started to talk, but she wouldn't look at him. "This can't go on, Deacon," she said. "You have to do something. I found out from Audrey that Cole is a recovering alcoholic."

"I ain't an alcoholic," he said angrily.

"He goes to AA meetings and has been sober for 5 years," she said, ignoring what he'd said. "He offered to take you to one today."

"No," he said. "I ain't an alcoholic and I ain't going to no meeting."

"Well, the way I see it you don't have much of a choice. Either stop drinking on your own or do it with some help. Because Maisie and I aren't going to live like this. She deserves a father who's not a drunk. Who's responsible and can be there for her."

"I'm not a drunk."

"Then stop drinking."

"I will."

"You've said that so many times I've lost count. It's time you did something about it. And that's all I've got to say about it. Do something, Deacon."

He leaned his head back and closed his eyes again. He didn't want to go to AA. That would be like admitting he was just like his father. The message he'd gotten from Gideon Claybourne over and over – you'll be just like me – was something he had sworn would not happen to him. He knew he was drinking too much and too often, but he did not believe he was an alcoholic. He could stop if he wanted to. He'd done it before. He could do it again. He didn't need help.

The next day, while Sam was at work, he asked Audrey if she could look after Maisie for an hour or so. She agreed, but he could tell she wanted to ask him about AA or the drinking situation. She'd been the one Sam had talked to so he knew she knew more than he would have wanted her to. He got out of her house as quickly as he could. Luckily Maisie was awake and demanded attention, so he could slip away without getting into a conversation about it.

He got back into his truck and drove slowly down the street, making a few turns and ending up in the parking lot of a church. He sat and watched people walking up to a doorway on the lower level of the church. They looked like normal, everyday people. Not like his father. Not like him. But I'm not an alcoholic. I don't need to do this. He sat for a few more minutes then started his truck back up and pulled out of the parking lot. He drove until he got to a diner close by, then went in and sat in a booth, ordering coffee and some breakfast.

He got up early the day he had to leave, early enough so that he could see Sam before she left for work. Things had settled down some in the days after she'd had to come get him out of jail, but it didn't feel like everything was alright like it should have been. He was in the kitchen when she came out of the bedroom and she stopped short when she saw him. He gestured towards the breakfast bar and tried to smile. "I made you some breakfast," he said. She looked at it, then back at him. "I just wanted to do it for you, you know, since I'm leaving." She nodded, then got up on one of the stools.

"Thanks," she said, as she picked up her fork. He turned and got her a mug of coffee and poured one for himself. He set her mug next to her and leaned against the counter while she ate. She looked up at him and gave him a little smile. "It's good. Thanks for doing this."

"I figure you probably don't eat much in the morning," he said.

"You'd be right about that." She ate until she was finished and then he took her plate.

"I put coffee in your travel mug," he said, setting that in front of her. He walked around the counter and stood in front of her. "I'm promising you I'm not drinking when I go back out. I get it. I know I need to be there for Maisie, be responsible. And for you. I really am sorry. I think I just miss you both so much."

She reached for his hand. "We miss you too. You know, you can call me every night if you want. No matter how late it is. If that helps."

He nodded and smiled. "I'd like that. I think it would help." She slid off the stool then and wrapped her arms around him. He held her close. "I really will miss you, baby," he whispered.

She looked up at him. "I'll miss you too." She put her hand on his cheek. "I love you, Deacon. Maisie loves you. And we need you."

He smiled. "I love you too. And I'll call you tonight."

"Great. I'll look forward to it." She stepped back, then picked up her purse and travel mug. He followed her to the door and pulled her into a hug, kissing her firmly. When he let her go, she smiled and then he opened the door for her and watched as she walked out to her car and drove off.

He called her every night, just as he'd promised. Sometimes it was really late, and they only talked for a few minutes, but he made sure to head for his room as soon as they got back from the show. One day, just weeks before the end of the tour, as they pulled into the hotel before the next tour stop, he had a message at the front desk when he checked in. Sam had called and said it was urgent. He felt a knot in his stomach, thinking something had happened to Maisie. He grabbed his keycard and raced to his room, his hands shaking when he picked up the phone and called. Of all the things he could have imagined, what she told him was not what he'd expected. He immediately found the tour manager and Dwight, letting them both know he had a family emergency and needed to leave and that he wouldn't be back. Then he grabbed his gear and his guitars and headed for the airport.

He sat back in his seat as the plane raced down the runway. He was still in shock and he also felt numb. His heart was pounding and he felt sick to his stomach. He'd been on the edge of a panic attack since he'd hung up the phone with Sam. Tears were in his eyes and occasionally they would slide down his cheeks. As the plane lifted off the runway, he closed his eyes, her words echoing through his brain. Deacon, I've been having what I thought were migraines, but then I passed out at work the day before yesterday, and they took me to the ER. It was one of the worst headaches I've ever had. They ran some tests and, well, the news isn't good. I, uh, I have a brain tumor and it's really bad, the worst you can have really. I really need you to come home. There had been a long pause, while he struggled to make sense of what she'd said. And then she'd driven him to his knees with her next words, spoken in a choked whisper. I'm so scared.

He felt overwhelmed by everything that was happening to Sam. Glioblastoma. Like she'd said, pretty much the worst brain cancer to get. She was younger than the normal person who was diagnosed with it. He was hopeful that would be in her favor, although the doctors had been cautious in their outlook when they'd talked to the both of them before and after her surgery. As they drove home after her release, she was very quiet. She'd been withdrawn since he'd returned home after her call, and he was worried. She would be going through radiation treatment next and then they would see where things stood.

"Where's Maisie?" she asked when they were about halfway home.

"Uh, with Audrey. We thought maybe she'd keep her for a few days until you're feeling a little better."

She nodded. "I guess it's good she's too young to really understand this."

Maisie was 2½ and certainly wouldn't understand what Sam was going through, but she had been asking for her mother since Sam had been in the hospital. "She misses you."

She looked over at him and smiled sadly. "I miss her too." She sighed. "I'm scared, Deacon."

He turned off the road and stopped the truck, turning to her and taking her hands in his. "I know. But we're gonna do everything we can, right?"

"Yeah. But you know they've said it doesn't look promising."

He shook his head. "You don't know that. You gotta stay positive, Sam."

She gave him a sad smile. "There's no cure. And we don't know how this treatment will go. I need to be prepared. We need to be prepared."

He knew that. He was just as scared as she was, maybe more. He thought it was very likely he was going to end up being a single parent to a small child and that by itself terrified him. But Sam was young. She had a lot of life left to live and he couldn't imagine how she felt, thinking she might not get to live it. He couldn't let her know all that though. He needed to be strong for her. For both of them. For all of them really. "But we also gotta think positive. I don't want you to think everything's hopeless, baby." He breathed in deeply. "Don't give up."

"I won't. I'll do everything I can, I promise." He saw tears start to fill her eyes. "I want to go get Maisie. I don't want to miss a single second with her."

He couldn't speak. All he could do was nod. He had a foreboding feeling deep down inside that he couldn't seem to get rid of. Their lives had been turned completely upside down.