'What's this?' Clark asked as his soon to be wife placed a misshapen muffin next to his morning coffee and placed her arms around his neck in an affectionate cuddle.
She placed a soft kiss on his cheek before releasing him and heading back over to the kitchen. 'Uh, just trying something.'
Clark smiled as he watched her go, noting the light and bouncy way she moved. As though there was a pre wedding spring in her step. They were only a week away from their impending nuptials, and despite warnings of cold feet and pre-wedding stress, Clark was feeling happier than ever.
Still, he looked down at the muffin dubiously. There were many, many things he loved about his fiance… but her cooking was not usually one of them.
'Did you… uh… make it yourself?'
Lois paused with her arms still in the cupboard and shot him a playful warning look.
'Yes, honey,' she said, with just a bit too much emphasis on the unusual nickname. 'Just try it. I know I'm not the best cook, but I think these banana muffins actually came out great.'
Clark surrendered to his mission. Whatever this banana muffin tasted like, he was going to have to face it. He'd been up against worse; he was sure he'd survive.
He took a bite, and after a few seconds, his eyebrows raised in surprise and he looked over at his partner, who was still eyeing him as she made her own coffee.
'It's actually good!' he mumbled as he took another bite, marvelling at his wife's ability to constantly surprise him.
'You don't have to sound that surprised,' she said, taking a seat next to him at her kitchen table.
He looked up apologetically, but he could see from the teasing expression on her face she was letting him off this time.
'Honey?' he asked curiously, his mind drifting back to her intentional use of the word.
'Thought I'd try that out too. We never really settled on a pet name. What do you think?' she asked as she took a bite of her toast.
'Uhh… I don't know… something about that just doesn't feel right,' he replied honestly, searching his mind for the reason why. 'Oh, yeah... no... that's what my mom calls me.'
'Honey is off the table!' Lois said firmly as she laughed. 'And pumpkin for that matter.'
'Pumpkin? Your dad calls you Pumpkin?'
'Oh, yeah… I know, it doesn't really fit with the whole intimidating General thing, does it?'
'I'm just glad to hear he has a softer side,' Clark mused.
His relationship with Lois' dad was… problematic. Over the last week, things had been getting more and more tense between them. He'd asked the man for his blessing before he'd proposed, but he'd refused to give it. 'I just don't think marrying you is what's best for my daughter,' he'd said bluntly, and although he'd also told him he knew that Lois was going to do what she wanted anyway, it still stung that he was withholding his support.
Especially with all the work they had been doing together at the DOD. Ever since Sam had found out who Clark really was, their working relationship had been much stronger. Sam had been able to get the DOD to trust him as an ally rather than a loose canon they needed to control, and they'd been able to save countless lives as a result. Yet still, whenever his relationship with Lois came into it, the General would stiffen up and try and change the topic.
Clark may have proven to his soon to be father-in-law that he wasn't a threat to the world… but he was yet to convince him that he wasn't a threat to his daughter. And maybe he was even right? Clark hated to admit it, but ever since he'd revealed Superman to the world, he had become a bit of a magnet for trouble… and that trouble often found it's way to Lois' lap too.
'He'll come around Clark,' she said softly, giving him a knowing look. 'He's just extremely protective of me. And my sister. Maybe you can win him over tonight with that small town charm?'
He gave her a sceptical look and she shrugged with a smile.
'Hey, no one thought it'd work on me either… but here we are!'
Clark returned her smile gratefully, but he couldn't shake his anxiety about how the night might go. Sure, the fact that the General had agreed to come to Clark's bachelor party was a good sign. It meant he wasn't completely disowning them… but something about the look that he'd given Clark when he said yes told him it was more about keeping an eye on him than anything else.
'You excited to see your sister?' he changed the topic swiftly.
'Sure! Though my dad will be the first to tell you we aren't the best drinking buddies.'
'Oh, really?' Clark laughed.
'Let's just say I'm glad Janet and Cat will be there to balance things out.'
He took another bite of the surprisingly delicious banana muffin and gave her his best dorky grin. 'You know, I think you're going to have to keep making these for the rest of our lives!'
'Sure thing, babe,' she said with a twinkle in her eye.
'Hmm, babe… I think I like that,' he said, giving her a flirtatious look in return.
Lois took the silent invitation and moved over to his side of the table. He pushed his chair out and pulled her gently onto his lap.
'Hey, babe,' she said softly as she stroked the side of his face.
Clark felt a warm glow spread through him, centred deeply in his heart. He gazed up at the women he was about to marry, feeling so full of gratitude and amazement that he had found someone this incredible, who loved him just as much as he loved her.
'What you thinking about, babe,' she said, slightly more seductively this time, and adding a trail of kisses down his neck for effect.
Clark sighed contentedly. 'Just that I am the luckiest man alive.'
'I know how you can get even luckier,' she said suggestively, sliding her hand slowly down his chest and abs.
'I thought we were trying to wait until after the wedding,' he pointed out, but did nothing to stop her hand from its tantalising descent.
'That was a stupid, stupid plan,' she said as she started to unbutton the work shirt he'd put on earlier that morning.
He could feel his body responding to her touch and the clear desire in her voice, but he couldn't resist the urge to tease her just a little bit more.
'But we'll be late for work,' he said with as straight a face as he could manage.
'Oh, really?' she asked, her eyes flashing with fiery challenge. 'You want me to stop then?'
Lois abandoned the final few buttons of Clark's shirt, letting it hang slightly open, and instead moved her hands up to start working on her own.
'I mean, we probably should… you know Perry hates it when we're late,' he continued in mock protest, but his eyes stayed firmly fixed on the lace covered breasts his fiancé was slowly revealing.
As though growing tired of their little game, she gave him a daring look and placed her hand firmly over the growing bulge in his crotch. He couldn't prevent the soft moan that escaped his lips at the unexpected contact.
'On second thoughts, let's just quit,' he said huskily, fully surrendering and pulling her in for a deep kiss.
There was really no way he was ever going to have won that game.
He wrapped his arms around her and sped them both into the bedroom, the sound of her delighted laughter filling him with joy. It was a sound he hoped he was going to get to hear for the rest of his life.
Oswald Loomis made the final adjustments to his latest piece of tech, taking extra care over the tank and its spray mechanism. The small cylinder contained a very special chemical he'd developed himself. A chemical that was going to make this the best prank he'd ever pulled off.
Sure, as a 'distraction for hire' now, his primary objective was simply to make sure Superman was out of the picture. That his client's robbery would go off smoothly.
But that didn't mean he couldn't have a little fun with the old man of steel at the same time.
He smiled to himself as he pictured all the ridiculous ways the night might go once his playmate was hit with a full blast of this unique cocktail. He should have got some popcorn. It was going to be one hell of a show.
Loomis dialled his client's number and lifted his phone to his cheek.
'I'm all set,' he confirmed.
'You're sure you've got Superman handled?' his client's muffled voice replied.
Whoever it was who'd hired him had preferred to keep his identity to himself.
'Oh I'm sure,' he said confidently. 'Trust me, this is going to be a night he won't forget.'
The line cut off abruptly, but Loomis shrugged it off. As long as he got paid, he didn't much care who hired him or what they were like. All he cared about was the opportunity to put his unique set of skills to good use, and to have a little fun in the process. He always knew exactly what to do to really get the balance right between calamity and comedy.
After all, they didn't call him the Prankster for nothing.