Later the previous day, June 20th.
"Not my kind of tune." Atsushi muttered, shaking his head as he returned to dialing the plastic knob.
"Huh?!" Kosuke shouted, stretching his hand out against the eccentric business man's complaints. "What do you mean 'not your tune', you don't like rock?!" The two of them have been arguing for quite a while now. It started out fine, there being glee among the castaways as he revealed to have been keeping busy by occupying himself with a radio. It was a great source of joy that helped pull him away from the lower regions of despair that had started to seep into the etches of his mind, beyond the insanity that his solitary confinement to the sea had begun an inevitable rot.
"Too loud, too disjointed…" Atsushi replied, shaking his head with great disappointment. He really figured a kindred spirit such as Kosuke would have better taste. "To appreciate music you have to understand it, and to understand it you have to be able to follow it. What's the use of swimming through all that chaos? It's nothing more than ruckus at the end of the day."
"Is that so?" Kosuke said, crossing his arms. He leaned back, his head towards the sky. "Well, enlighten me here, what kind of music suits your tastes?"
"Classical." Like a true, pretentious person, he answered in a posh voice.
"HUUAAAH?!" Kosuke leaped to his feet, Atsushi following. Standing at opposing ends, their conflict started to rock the boat. The lone, deadly waves crashed against what was left of their logged raft, puddles starting to leak onto the floor. "How could you subject yourself to that, man?! That's got to be the most boring choice you could ever have! Besides, how do you understand a piece of music without words?!"
"Oh, how simple it is to do so!" Atsushi shouted back. "It is not my fault that you've proven to have not only flat ears, but a flat mind as well! If I didn't know any better, I would say-"
"Don't say it!" Kosuke pleaded, pressing his palm against Atsushi's face. That action caused the argument to become physical between them. Wrapping their arms around the other, they began to wrestle; their neatly kept hair being ruffled into a huge cloud of silky strands. "Why, you–!"
"Hey, n-no fair!"
As the idiots continued to argue, Atlia sat at the edge of the boat. She hadn't said a word in hours. Since a new person had arrived, all of her hope had disappeared. This was it, her final resignation. Drifting down an endless blue road, with no sustenance, and no direction to salvation, Atlia remained silent within her presumed deathbed. Surviving off of candy was impossible, and what food could possibly be obtained was unforeseeable using these bare hands alone. What, was she going to make a fishing rod out of dreams? Perhaps a mile long spear with a shred of optimism? Preposterous. It was useless, all useless! She was going to die here, surrounded by foul idiots who may outlive her!
What scared her most was not dying alone, but the thought that these two buffoons could be rescued postmortem. If Atlia was going to spend her last days, or hours – who knows how long she really had, then she wasn't going to let those two prosper under any circumstance! Swearing by it, the only reason she was still alive was because if those two lived to see freedom, then she would claw her way out from the afterlife and drag those idiots into the unknown herself!
Oh, the humanity! Her tongue was dry and going numb, being unable to remember what real food tasted like. Watermelon: did it take one bite, or three to break through? Beef… Was it salty, or more sweet when roasted? Mushrooms… What were the sounds that her teeth made crunching against them? Crunch, no… they weren't crunchy, right? Why did that travelling jerk have to bring only candy?! Such sourness… She couldn't handle it anymore! If even a smidge of candy touched her mouth, Atlia was going to be coughing up blood. Painting the sea red with her own body wasn't going to be how she was going out!
"Hand me… the radio!" The shouting match fell back onto her ears as reality began to sink in. All these fantasies of sweet revenge were mute. The only other people on this ship were buffoons. She was going to die with buffoons, surrounded by buffoons, as a buffoon!
"N-no, it was mine to begin with!" Atsushi said through his teeth, tugging at Kosuke. First a man without taste, and then without dignity as he tries to rob him of the only thing that kept him remotely sane these past few days!
"Someone like you shouldn't even own a treasure such as this!"
"If I had half the size your head–"
"There's no need to continue!" Kosuke said, flashing his palm in front of the once well dressed man's face again.
"Why, you…!" Within their scuffle, the radio was released from either of their hands and landed, thankfully undamaged, onto the loose boards of the boat. One of them was about to take control over the music until an unfamiliar, catchy tune stopped them both in their tracks. "Oh, this is…"
"Hey, why didn't you turn to this station b–" This time it was Kosuke who was shushed. A rhythmic, almost haunting in how cheery it made them, melody sauntered gracefully through the air. As though an ancient spirit had overtaken their bodies, Kosuke and Atsushi began to boogie down! The signal wasn't the clearest, but it was definitely enough to rejuvenate that will to live in both of them. Humming, glamorous vocals that was like an ice cold glass of lemonade quenching a primal thirst under the beaming sun ran its way through their ears, swimming in graceful strokes with their vibrations. In addition to the masterful composition, it had a catchy chorus, using a long out-of-order phone number to drag those without a smile into their joyful choir.
As Kosuke and Atsushi sung, hand in hand without a shred of care in the world for their safety, Atlia slumped over with her legs curled up to her chest and closed her eyes, for she had no more room for tears. "So… hungry." The buffoons danced around her, howling into the evening sky. Everyone was hungry, everyone was tired, but not everyone was happy. Visions of buffets started to fill her head as the sounds of thumping boots stirred their incessant disturbances into that huge pot of frustration swirling at the front of her heart.
"I-I can see it…" Ahead of her, making circular motions in a taunting manner, was an enormous fish. It had enticing, rosy scales that she imagined slicing into, bit by bit, curling back to find a fat cut of meat she could dig her teeth into. Only after removing those huge, ebony blankets stitched together. The satisfying skreee noise that would sing a delightful tune to the woman's ears upon tearing them off. Ah, she remembered how her father used to prepare such fish for dinner. After a long, tired day he still had the energy to prepare a meal for his children. Such tenacity that she didn't have. She was a disappointment on every end.
The last happy memories Atlia could gather were being smothered by the pain of being unable to live up to arbitrary promises only she held in her own heart. As the memories continued to flood in, Atlia became more irritated as the bitter details came back into focus. Beyond her father's kindness, Atlia remembered the incessant sea of tears from her older sister, who decried injustice towards their dinner. She didn't like fish, and begged her exhausted Father for something else! Beg, beg, beg… All she ever did was beg, and she got whatever she wanted! All the while Atlia, who caved in and made sacrifice after sacrifice for that family got nothing in return! It was one compromise after another. Why should she now compromise her life for this family?! "I'll feed you to the sea…" Atlia muttered, reaching a hand out towards the mirage ahead of her. "One day, dear sister, I'll feed you to that fish…" Everything became dark.
"That fish…" Atlia said once more, in a soft, weak voice. "Fish…"
"THAT FISH IS REAL!" Atlia sprung to her feet, screaming at the top of her lungs. About a mile out, a fierce creature whose size could not be comprehended in simple words, words that have been since lost to a time where her stomach wasn't an empty void, circled around in the barren sea, transforming it into its personal battlefield once the vessel had arrived in the view of their deep, haunting eyes. The Shredder…
Once a peaceful guardian, now tainted by its own lust for flesh. Our trio weren't the only ones who were hungry.
"Ah, finally!" Kosuke was grinning ear to ear as he knelt down next to her. "Here's the main dish we've all been waiting for!"
"Are you out of your mind?!" Atlia took him by the collar, shaking him violently. "That thing could swallow this entire ship whole without even so much as breaking a sweat! How dense can you be to want to fight that?! I'd rather starve than to be gobbled up by - by that thing!" Whatever brain Kosuke had left was being rattled by her continual rant. "You're just going to lead it right here, aren't you?! That's what you're doing, huh?! You want us to die! You want me to die! You've been planning this from–"
"DON'T SAY IT…" Kosuke shouted back, silencing her for good with his commanding voice. Slowly, he got to his feet, dusting himself off from that unbecoming mix of grime and navy blue slime littered all over the palms of her hands. After a few long, boring days full of nothing but sitting around and waiting for danger to arrive, opportunity finally struck! "Haven't you heard?" He asked, reaching into his pocket. He bore a shiny, cornflower and gold ring. "Danger brings opportunity!"
DRIVER ON!
Throwing his arm out into the air, it crossed over the other and they swirled in a circular motion as Kosuke called upon the guiding wind. "Traaaaaaans…" His arms met towards the right of his body on opposing levels, creating a semi-circular shape. The beast shot an excited glare straight down the line towards the Shredder! "Form!"
HYPER, GO! HY-HY-HY-HYPER!
KAMEN RIDER: HYPER BEAST
The driver roared, and Kamen Rider Beast leapt into battle. He laughed, spinning the Mirage Magnum, his trusty weapon, around by his index finger. "It's lunchtime!" Just the right size! Finally, his luck was turning around! Without another word, Beast started firing rapidly at the fish, laughing all the way. It steered around and headed straight for their ship. His passengers locked arms, gushing out terror as far as their lungs could carry, but Beast ignored their pleas and continued to fire. Letting an entree slip past his grasp was certain death. So what if his dish was like a hundred times his size and could tear them apart?! Taking his chances, he would rather be gobbled than to die having never gobbled anything tasty again!
As if it were an aquatic jet, the Shredder split the sea with its giant wings, creating deadly waves that certainly had the capacity to sweep the vessel beneath an undertow! "Just a little more…" Beast said, shooting a malicious grin between his stream of magical blasts. "And you're all mine, big guy!" Here it was, the deciding moment! A few meters closer and he was going to strike through the head. Keep it tight, keep it steady… Tight, steady… if he wants to be ready. Here it goes, take a breath. Breath taken. This is your chance, don't disappoint! "Let's sizzle some salt on you when this is through!"
Before he could fire, the ship darted towards the left down the ocean, creating a huge misfire on Beast's part, splitting the clouds with his pellet! "W-woah, hey, what the hell's going on here?!" He asked, struggling to keep his balance. His fingers slipped, firing several random shots throughout the air, not a single one even grazing the foul devastation that lies before them! Just barely, did the ship escape its grasp. "Hey, what's the big deal?!" Beast cried, turning back to Atlia, who although for the past while said nothing at all and showed resentment towards life itself, suddenly clinging on to the thought of seeing brighter days!
"Are you insane?!" Atlia shouted. "That little peashooter pulled off a nice trick, so what?! It can't stop that thing!"
"No choice now!" Beast retorted, snarling at her. "And hey, who're you to call this thing a peashooter?! This isn't just something you wave around!" He said, waving that thing around. A mountain of teeth crashed against the hull of the ship, shredding (get it?) straight through as though a faint wind had passed by and the parts that once were never were there to begin with! "Fierce one, aren't you?!" He cackled as the ship rotated in the shape of a spiral through the crashing waves. "Well, I've got teeth too…"
The hunt commenced, for real this time. "Hey, make way towards it, stat! Point that bridge westbound and port her rudder straight where we can drop the anchor!"
"What?!" Atlia shouted, puzzled at his suggestions.
"Come on, we don't have all day, do it!"
"No, I mean that's not a ship command! We don't even have an anchor!"
"Aaah, don't say it!" Beast shouted, throwing a palm up into the air. His momentary lack of focus left him open to being torn to unrecognizable bits as the swimming giant leaped through the air, barely hanging over the ship! It seems to have learned a new trick since its first expedition above the water, and if it was ever going to be thrown again, then they were taking control here!
The pressure from such a ginormous crash created a ripple that tossed their vessel several feet into the air! "M-my product!" Atsushi watched as his suitcase toppled over, leaving his carefully crafted candy perfection to sink several leagues down; never would it be found. Never, ever again. Well, there goes a hefty investment. He supposed there were always better startups. Perhaps real estate?! "N-no, not my radio!"
"Oh, not on my watch!"
CHAMELO, GO!
The golden spines wrapped around his arms stretched out as though they were rubber and coiled around the radio, saving it from the same fate! He tossed it up to Atsushi, who, while hanging from the mast, caught it with one hand; he barely had enough strength to keep himself from meeting an untimely end, but that radio meant more to him than his life! It was his brother in arms now! Or… sister in arms, or… them in arms – it didn't matter, that radio was theirs to keep! He sure as hell wasn't going to let the last hinge he had of sanity slip away!
They landed safely, with Atlia, shaking in her boots of course, still at the helm and directing this one way trip to the afterlife. The Shredder re-emerged starboard, intent on taking them out for good this time. "Oh!" Beast slapped his palms over his cheeks, the lightbulb in his head finally being plugged in. "I've got it." He sheathed his magnum, smashing his fists together. "Heh, goodbye fishie, hello food!"
"Hey, Kosuke!" Atsushi said, sweeping the seaweed out of his majestic ashy mane. "What are you intending on doing?!"
"It's a little daring, but you and I are going to be eating like kings for the next few days!" He shot him one last look before enacting this fool-proof, fool-requiring plan. "Treat him a little and have that guy weep at the thought of being on the cusp of tasting us!"
"How do you think this has been going so far?!" Still screaming, Atlia was dead set on tearing his head off if they somehow managed to escape, much less survive! It was all or nothing though, and she didn't have a better plan aside from sacrifice and pleading on her knees that her cruelty would be admired. Although, with a creature as heartless and as vicious as this, which is why only experienced sailors, sailors who got proper training instead of a slap on the back and chuckle with good luck, were tasked with bringing foreigners to their island! Oh, she imagined it now… All the fireworks, dancing and festivities she had to miss because of one bad investment into melons!
Now was not the time to be thinking so vainly. The ship performed its possibly final curve through the sea, skirting around the Shredder once more. Standing face to face, Beast met the eyes of the greatest monster he's faced thus far. "Alright," He placed his palms together. "It's time for the main dish!" Running as fast as he could, Beast took a major leap straight off the edge, heading right for the Shredder's gaping mouth with seemingly no way out!
"That's his plan?!" Atlia asked. All hope was lost. Better sink into despair now and save yourself the trouble…
Is what we would be saying had Beast totally lost his marbles! No, those marbles were still in that circle and more than ready to knock the shiny opposition straight out of the park! Extending his spines once more, Beast used them like ropes and wrapped around the translucent rigid fins on his back! "Let's take this little guy for a swim!" Using all of his might, with the help of magic of course, because who could withstand the force of a cosmic bull, Beast seized control of their body and rode them along like a sea-horse! Although, they were not a seahorse, of course.
"He actually did it…" Atlia muttered.
"Ah, that's my brother!" Atsushi cheered. He was splashed with a mountain of water. "O-oh, hey, keep that thing away from here!"
Wrestling with this giant wasn't a big deal! Or so, that's what he had to tell himself in order to remain conscious. Every other second, Beast was splitting at each end, his teeth driving themselves through his tongue. His cracked, weary fingers creased with rising pressure. Frosty, navy puddles enveloped around his neck and suffocated the mage. Not a single part of his body was left untouched through pain, but hey, he's handled worse!
"M-man, you're a t… tough one!" Beast laughed, his arms absolutely tearing at the seams. Muscles being stretched the furthest until they were nothing more but thin, velvet lines which couldn't hold any longer to be stacked on top of each other. If the Shredder wasn't going to take his flesh by force he would take it by wearing him until there was nothing left.
Extending his luck even further, Beast traded control (for what little he had) for reach. Yeah, his plan was to get on the back of this thing, but he hadn't exactly thought about what came next! Shortsightedness was his hamartia, after all. That and gluttony – probably more the gluttony since he needed that to survive! It's pound time! Smashing his fist over, and over, and over, against the skin, but to no avail! For all his might, he wasn't making a dent. "Rrgh, go down already! I'm starving!" Over, over, over, over, over, over, over, over, over, over, over!
It was over, but not for the Shredder. It grew tired of this little game, and it was time to enjoy a great meal. Lowering its head beneath the surface, it swam with Beast clinging on by a thread and leaped once more into the air, propelling Beast at least a hundred feet high! The creature opened its mouth, splitting a few meters wide – wide enough to devour a school bus!
"So, that's how it is, huh?!" Thank the stars for electricity, because that bulb in his head lit up once more! The ultimate gamble. Reaching for the Mirage Magnum, Beast turned his back to his opponent, seemingly accepting his fate as he closed his eyes and snuggled his beloved weapon into his chest. "Don't say it's the end…" He muttered, dishing out one last chuckle. "Not before dessert."
A golden light emitted from his gun, encasing him beneath a blanket of blindness. The Magnum Mirage rattled, so much so that his fingers wrapped tightly around the handle resting against his chest provided the only safety net to keep the thing from flying away, out into the endless sea!
BOOM!
A firework with the force of a cannon blasted from our chaotic hero, as if he was setting a military fighter jet on the edge of a rubber band to which he pulled all the way back, right before it managed to snap! The sheer force alone propelled him straight towards the Shredder faster than the blink of an eye! Spinning through the air like a falling star, Beast gracefully pivoted and enacted the final plan!
FINISHING MOVE: HYPER-SPINNING-ULTRA-ZOOMING-WILD-RIDER KICK!
In one idiotic fell swoop, Kosuke Nitoh had done what hundreds of men across centuries could never achieve. The Shredder was defeated, once and for all. That five star gourmet meal was obtained! Somehow, through sheer stupidity, Kosuke not only returned to the ship with his life, but enough food to last them a month – maybe longer, if they were generous.
"Mm…" Atsushi nodded, chowing down on his share. "Perhaps I've been too narrow minded. The real business is in meat! Ah, such a succulent taste…"
"Oh, you could open up a restaurant on that island! Ah, what was it called again…?"
"Chlstuce!" Atlia shouted with a mouth full of real food, and with glee. The first time in who knows how long, she was able to smile for something other than malice! Just like that, all of her hatred washed away into the waves. For now, at least. "This is… so…" She began tearing up, making her slab of food saltier than the surrounding ocean.
"Don't say it!" Kosuke shouted. "I'm more than aware how great it is, that's why I couldn't pass up the opportunity!" He grinned so hard creases could be seen forming among his tanned face. "Besides, it was pretty exhilarating, huh?" Was he a masochist, or just outright crazy? Well, who can say for sure. All he knew is that he had something over that pesky rival of his. He's probably sitting back right now, dipping his fingers into some fancy dishes made of words he couldn't pronounce – something french, or whatever. It was fancy, OK?!
Nonetheless, he could eat as much as he wanted, and it still wouldn't measure up to this big guy. It was actually quite a surprise that he was able to carry all that meat. It took hours to dice it up. He wasn't going to leave a single piece behind, so he used the power of eagle constructs, each infused with the strength of superhuman bulls from his other mantle to load them up on the surface. Fortunately, for as much damage as it sustained, the boat was still usable, and surprisingly more dense than anyone could imagine.
Removing his tricorn hat, Kosuke showed off the one thing most of us have been waiting for. A full bottle of mayonnaise. Pouring it out on his slice of meat, he chowed down with pure bliss. This was life, and he was enjoying every second of it. Plus, this was only the beginning! Sure, he was a little late to the festivities, but he could have some slack cut. Who could have predicted being shipwrecked? Oh, Haruto was going to be so miserable upon hearing how great his ride was! That frown upon his legend coming to unexpecting ears was something he would die for to commemorate. A hero's journey with rising action, a steep fall from grace, elevation towards a simmering climax, and a godly flame to finish off the peak of his story. What a great cruise. Excellent service, great company, some nice tunes and amazing food. It was an 11/10 experience that he wouldn't trade for anything in the world!
What was once a certain tragedy turned to surprise salvation, all thanks to the help of Kosuke Nitoh, who even buried beneath the deepest layers of misfortune, held onto his hope and fought to keep his smile. As much as it pained them to admit, if Kosuke hadn't been on this boat, tomorrow was only a dream.
Little did any of them know what awaited them on Celestice Island, but maybe it was for the better that they showed up late to the party. After all, three was a party, and their party was right here on this little boat. Lonely amongst the eternal waves, but not alone anymore. The three of them were buffoons, and that was OK. Why? Because they were OK, and they were happy! So long as you can still smile in the face of danger, opportunities you could never imagine will open their door to you.
"Anyone want some?" Kosuke asked, sharing his mayonnaise. Not a single soul dared to touch that bottle.
AUTHOR'S NOTE (07/31/2023):
Quick update and thanks:
Update: School is starting up again within a month, and I'll be a bit busy with my new living situation (I am OK!), getting accustomed to working too during the semester, so my updates will be more sporadic, but I promise you I'll find the time to finish this story, and then it's Girls Trio we go! If you haven't read The Witch, The Robot, and The Bugster please check it out!
Before we begin, I have to thank you all so far for coming with me on this journey. Here we are, the penultimate chapter before the two parter finale! Each and every single one of you readers have inspired me to keep writing, so I have to thank you all for that before we continue! This is my first real long-fic, at least in five years, and the first one I will complete! So, once again: thank you so so so so so so so so so much for encouraging me to keep writing! I love reading every single comment, and seeing even a new view because it tells me my writing was enough for you to want to check it out!
ON ANOTHER NOTE:
I got the Wizard 10th anniversary figure. Neat! Moves much better than the first iteration, but I love both. Man, that torso is hard to strap back on once you take it off... That cloth cape is pretty damn cool though - even if I did ruffle it a little bit. The new proportions alone are well worth it. It's so shiny too!
I wonder what I should get next... Perhaps Genm? Or Ex-Aid? Or Poppy! Who knows, I'll know when the time is right! Until then, my Wizard collection will keep me company.