Naruto and Karin were aboard a cargo ship carrying them from the shores of Hi no Kuni into the sprawling archipelago that was Mizu no Kuni. Rather than stowing away, Naruto opted to offer the ship's captain protection from pirates and rogue ninja on their voyage in exchange for passage for himself and Karin, to which the captain gladly accepted. Their destination was one of the smaller islands that served as an outpost for Kirigakure where they would rendezvous with a Kiri-nin that would be expecting them, and they'd lead the pair into the village proper to see the Mizukage. Since the war's conclusion and the village's rebuilding efforts began in earnest, foreign shinobi were screened at one of several outposts surrounding the main island chain before they could enter Kirigakure simply as a precaution. Naruto thought it was pretty smart, so he didn't have much issue with it.

Currently, the two were sitting on the main mast of the vessel and watching over the ship's crew as they went about their duties. They hadn't encountered any issues that Naruto couldn't just send a clone to handle before they even became a problem, such as the occasional dinghy carrying opportunistic pirates attempting to approach the ship undetected. As a result, the two had a fair bit of downtime, Karin especially. She had filled that time by reading through the medical textbooks that Shizune gave her to keep up her training, but after inevitably finishing those, she was left with nothing to do beyond people-watching with her sensei/best friend/older brother-figure (she'd have to think over that last one a little more).

That was until something crossed her mind, and she thought it over for a moment before turning to Naruto to ask him a question. "Hey, Naruto, can people only travel in and out of Mizu via ship?"

Naruto turned to Karin with a thoughtful expression. "Not always, but it's the most common method of transportation in and out of the country, especially for civilians. Why?"

"It just seems a bit inconvenient," she mused while looking back at the watery expanse. "Especially if a mission out of the country is time-sensitive, you wouldn't want to be constrained by the speed of the ship and waste time. Is it because traveling on foot on the ocean is too treacherous?"

Naruto hummed, enjoying the good question Karin posed to him. "Water-walking on the ocean is difficult, but it's not impossible. For anyone with refined enough chakra control, it's only tedious. For Kiri-nin, though, it's just Tuesday. They're specifically adapted to and more proficient at traveling and fighting on water. It's kinda their thing, sorta like how Konoha-nin are substantially more deadly in the forest than anywhere else. The trees are your enemy."

Karin nodded in understanding with a thoughtful expression. "I had no idea."

"Each village's ninja have natural advantages over the others based on their nation's geography," Naruto continued. "Konoha-nin are superbly adept at traveling by tree. Suna-nin are unmatched at traveling through the desert, as maintaining a decent pace on sand is about as tedious as water-walking on the ocean for anyone outside of Kiri, and that's not even to mention navigating through sandstorms and remembering where things are when everything in the desert looks the same. Kumo-nin are used to living in higher altitudes where the air is thinner, so their endurance and conditioning is top notch. Don't ever get into a prolonged battle of attrition with anyone from Kumo; they'll just outlast you."

"What about Iwa? Do they have any geographical specialties?"

"They arguably have the best, as it goes hand-in-hand with their ninjutsu. Their advantages are almost intrinsically tied to their chakra natures since earth chakra natures are naturally more prevalent up there. Because Tsuchi no Kuni is mostly dry, semi-arid wasteland without a lot of vegetation, they have a ton of earth to work with, and that fact has made them pretty damn deadly with large-scale earth ninjutsu because they can practice using larger amounts of it with the lowest level of chakra expenditure. Efficiency is king for them."

"So, they're like Kiri-nin and water," Karin surmised, committing everything Naruto said to memory.

"Bingo," Naruto confirmed with a satisfied smile.

The rest of the journey went similarly with the two talking casually about whatever came to mind as the cargo ship cruised along. It wasn't long before they entered Kiri-controlled waters, and very soon afterward, they were docking at the island. After saying their goodbyes to the crew, the Akatsuki duo hopped off of the boat and approached the outpost. Naruto could sense a familiar chakra signature watching them, and he knew that Karin did, too, so he wasn't at all surprised when a stern-looking man with an eyepatch flickered in front of them before they could make it very far.

"Ao, it's been a while," Naruto greeted the older man with an easy wave.

"Naruto," Ao greeted curtly in return, not returning the gesture.

"Oh, come on, loosen up a little," Naruto sighed in exasperation. "We literally fought in a war together."

"Hn," Ao grunted before turning around and walking toward the outpost. "I'll be your escort to Lady Mizukage."

"I swear, Ao, you could suck the joy out of an orgasm," Naruto deadpanned with a roll of his eyes while Karin giggled beside him at someone else managing to get under Naruto's skin for a change.

The man said nothing in response as the group proceeded on towards a ferry that would transport them to the main island chain where the village was situated. It wasn't that he necessarily disliked Naruto; he certainly respected the teen and his efforts in assisting their resistance against Yagura. However, Naruto's striking resemblance to Minato Namikaze always made Ao nervous. The Yellow Flash was feared the world over for good reason, and Kiri was on the opposite side of Konoha in the last Great War, as evidenced by the Byakugan sitting in Ao's eye socket.

Ao knew that Naruto held no allegiance to Konoha and was strictly loyal to Akatsuki, but Ao hadn't lived as long as he had without being cautious, often overly-so. An ally today could very well become an enemy tomorrow, and having seen Naruto in battle firsthand, eclipsing the deceased Hokage's reputation was a matter of "when", not "if". Henceforth, fraternizing with the foreign shinobi wasn't really an option, at least in Ao's opinion. You just didn't do that back in his day.

With that said, he still had a mission to complete. Lady Mizukage trusted Naruto, so he would escort them to her but remain wary of any funny business, as any good shinobi would.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. You may be a fossil, but you're not deaf yet. I'm not taking the job."

Pakura couldn't fight the snort that escaped her at the aghast and indignant expressions worn by the two decrepit advisors. After Tenten was dismissed, the first place the group of four went to when they finally arrived in Konoha was the Hokage Tower to sort out Orochimaru's bounty for Naruto. However, waiting for them at the office was a duo of village elders who, presumably, assumed that Jiraiya had succeeded in his assigned task of retrieving Tsunade to become Hokage.

Pakura didn't have to imagine their shock when they realized that Jiraiya had not, in fact, convinced Tsunade to become Hokage, instead returning for entirely different reasons. She was there to witness it, and she got a kick out of their sputtering. Pakura always enjoyed seeing geriatric bureaucrats not get their way. She never much cared for the advisory council in Suna, and the feelings were very mutual if her assassination attempt was any indication.

She liked Chiyo, though. Chiyo and Ebizo were cool.

"What do you mean?" the spectacled man of the duo questioned. "The village needs a Hokage!"

"Then get the pervert to do it," Tsunade waved him off. "He was your first choice, right?"

"You can't just refuse the position, Tsunade," the man started to speak up again, but he was halted by the woman of the duo placing her hand up.

"No, no, she has a point," the old woman agreed. "We did approach Jiraiya first, and he deferred to Tsunade. If Tsunade refuses the title, then Jiraiya must take it."

It was Jiraiya's turn to pale and indignatly sputter, drawing another amused snort from Pakura, and she could see Shizune stifling a giggle to her left. Coming to Konoha was definitely the right decision.

"No way," Jiraiya vehemently denied. "I'm not cut out for the job. Besides, I have important business to take care of outside of the village that I couldn't tend to if I was stuck behind a desk. That's a lot of freedom that I'd be giving up."

"But it's perfectly reasonable that I give up mine?" Tsunade questioned with a narrowed gaze.

Jiraiya shrugged. "Do you want an honest answer?"

The cracking of Tsunade's knuckles indicated to Jiraiya that this was not the correct response, but before his former teammate could knock him back to Mt. Myoboku, Pakura chose that moment to throw in her two cents.

"How about you two play rock-paper-scissors for it?" she casually suggested, drawing quizzical looks from several of the room's occupants. "What?"

"…Rock-paper-scissors?" Tsunade drawled with a raised eyebrow. "To decide on a Kage? Really?"

The old fart with glasses cleared his throat. "Actually, it wouldn't be the first time. Few people know this, but rock-paper-scissors was how Lord Hashirama and Madara determined who would be the Shodai. Madara was bitter about his loss for the rest of his days, and he banned rock-paper-scissors among the Uchiha Clan in perpetuity."

The other 4 adults had no idea what to say to that. It was just so absolutely preposterous that the leader of the first ninja village was decided on so trivially, and the fact that said trivial game may have contributed to an eventual, titanic battle that carved a literal valley into a landscape was even more absurd.

Therefore, they could absolutely believe that it was the god's honest truth, because nothing in the ninja world made sense.

"That… honestly doesn't surprise me," Tsunade groaned. "Grandpa Hashi was a weird man."

"It's sounding like a tried-and-true Konoha tradition to me," Pakura snarked with a shrug.

"Shut it!" the blonde retorted before turning back to Jiraiya and away from the Akatsuki member snickering in vindication. "Fine, let's just get this over with."

"Woah, woah, I never agreed to-" Jiraiya began before he was yanked by the collar and dragged to eye level to meet his former teammate's icy glare.

"Put your goddamn hands up, or I will break both your nose and your ribs," she growled, and the man fearfully complied.

Overseen and officiated by the esteemed elders of Konohagakure no Sato, the two remaining loyal students of Hiruzen Sarutobi engaged in a game of rock-paper-scissors that would bestow the position of Godaime Hokage of Konohagakure upon the loser. It was to be a high-stakes, sudden death matchup with only one round to determine the victor. There was no best-of-3 in the ninja world, as effective shinobi did not leave room for a second encounter.

The room was thick with tension as the two squared off, fists extended and ready for action. The elders counted down, and as they reached 0, one could see the steely resolve glinting in the eyes of both legendary ninja. Upon the signal, the two hands went into action for the most important game of rock-paper-scissors in generations.

Or, more accurately, Tsunade's fist went into action by socking Jiraiya in the nose. Not expecting the punch whatsoever, Jiraiya yelped and covered his broken and bleeding nose with his palm, and Tsunade took advantage by clamping his hand in between her index and middle fingers for the victory.

Scissors beats paper, after all.

"It is decided, Jiraiya is our Godaime," the old woman announced without missing a beat. Pakura, struggling to suppress her laughter beside an equally struggling Shizune, suspected that the old lady had seen a lot of really ridiculous shit in her day to be so unfazed by the absurdity of what had just occurred.

"That wasn't fair!" Jiraiya nasally squawked as he readjusted his nose.

"You should've seen that coming," Tsunade shrugged with a victorious smirk before she extended a glowing palm to his face. "We're ninja. Nothing about us is ever fair."

As much as he wanted to protest, he could only resignedly sigh and concede the point. She wasn't wrong. He got caught with his pants down, and not in the good way.

"Alright, fine, I'll be the damn Hokage," he grumbled after Tsunade finished healing his nose.

"Excellent," the male codger nodded. "We will begin the preparations for your coronation at once."

"The coronation will have to wait," Jiraiya declared, any lightheartedness in his voice gone. "I have a trip to make."

The elders blinked. "To where, exactly?"

"Ame. There are some people I need to talk to. Call it a diplomatic venture if that makes you feel better."

Pakura was still uneasy about that. She trusted Naruto's judgement, but no one just wandered into Ame and got an audience with Pain, regardless of if they were well-acquainted beforehand. Granted, Akatsuki was beginning to enact its plan for peace on a geopolitical scale, so perhaps the Toad Sage being the newly crowned Hokage could help with that, but she also wouldn't be terribly surprised if Jiraiya didn't make it out of the village, assuming he made it inside in the first place.

Whatever. It wasn't Pakura's problem at this point. They'd be expecting him, anyway. All she had to do right now was get the bounty for Naruto and hit up an onsen to soak her tired muscles. Those were hard to come by in Suna and Ame, so she'd for damn sure take advantage of the abundance of such in Konoha.

After collecting the bounty and leaving, she was followed out of the door by Tsunade, Shizune, and Jiraiya at the conclusion of their business with the elders. That left Homura and Koharu alone in the office that was still populated by their late teammate and friend's effects. It was a somber moment for all of 5 seconds before Homura turned to Koharu.

"Was that Pakura of the Scorch Release?" the man finally addressed the elephant in the room. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't she dead?"

Koharu merely shrugged. "I simply assumed that she was one of the souls Orochimaru disturbed with his bastardization of Sensei's jutsu."

"…Should we really let her out into the village?"

"Are you going to stop her?"

"You guys really cleaned up nicely since the last time I was here," Naruto complimented as he took in the ornate interior of the Mizukage Tower.

"We had to rebuild the tower from scratch after it was annihilated by a mob of kamikaze clones," Ao pointedly grumbled.

"I don't know why you're directing that at me, it was Mei's idea to flush Yagura out," Naruto snorted.

"That's Lady Mizukage to you," Ao snapped. "Back in my day, we respected our superiors."

"Back in your day, you also stole dojutsu."

Ao stopped in his tracks and faced Naruto with a dark glare. Naruto met his glare head-on with an expression of pure blankness, weathering the newfound tension in the hallway as if none was present. Karin wasn't fairing as well, nervously looking between the two and hoping no conflict was afoot.

"It was war," Ao bit out in a tone frigid enough to give any surrounding Kiri-nin pause.

Naruto only shrugged in response. "Not judging, just stating a fact."

Now, the entire hallway was on edge. Most of the shinobi around knew of Naruto from his assistance in the rebellion, and while they knew that Ao wouldn't stand a snowball's chance in hell against Naruto, they also trusted that Naruto wouldn't seriously harm him if the largely one-sided tension reached a boiling point. Still, they had only recently finished rebuilding the tower, and they really didn't want to have to do that a second time.

"Ao, stop antagonizing the contractor."

The stern voice of the Mizukage made Ao stiffen and stand at attention, and the rest of the shinobi in the area sighed in relief. They were spared a second rebuild that day.

"My apologies, Lady Mizukage," Ao dutifully replied with a bow, causing Mei to annoyedly sigh with a shake of her head.

"Enough of that, just get into the office," Mei ordered in exasperation and gestured to the large, open doorway at the end of the hall. "It's good to see you again, Naruto."

"Likewise," Naruto replied with a smile as the group made their way to her office. "The village looks fantastic."

"I'm happy you think so," she replied with a smile of her own. "We worked tirelessly to rebuild following Yagura's defeat. Soon, Kiri will finally be able to shed its bloody reputation and see a new, brighter future."

Once the group was inside the office and Mei was back behind her desk with Ao to her side, Naruto and Karin (mostly Naruto) entered "professionalism mode" and stood at attention before their client.

"So, I assume the retrieval went well," Mei said, her slender, manicured hands steepled in front of her as she gazed at the Akatsuki duo.

Naruto nodded before reaching into his cloak and pulling out two storage scrolls, placing them onto Mei's desk. "The Kiba, as you requested, as well as Raiga's remains."

"Excellent," Mei remarked as her lips curved into her trademark, alluring smile. Then, it softened into a more fond one. "Hopefully, this will give little Buntan some measure of closure."

"Are you gonna pass the swords onto her?" Naruto asked.

"I'm considering it," she answered honestly. "She's been working with Chojuro to improve her swordsmanship. She'd be a nice addition to a reformed Seven Swordsmen, depending on her progress."

Naruto nodded, and he was reminded of something at the mention of a possible reformation of the Seven Swordsmen. "Right, I ran into Kisame on my way here."

The eyes of Mei and Ao widened at that reveal, but before either could press, Naruto continued. "We tussled, and he promised a rematch before he fled, so whenever that happens, I'll be sure to bring by Samehada so that you'll have the complete set once again."

Had anyone else casually admitted to fighting Kisame and also implied that they made the most dangerous missing-nin to ever come out of Kiri turn tail and run, Mei and Ao would laugh them out of the village. However, after personally witnessing the teen before them flog a fully manifested Sanbi with a massive amalgamation of chains and chakra tails while a gang of giant salamanders held it down, something like that was substantially easier to believe. This only strengthened Ao's decision to remain wary of the blonde mercenary for the possibility that his absurd power could be turned against them.

Mei, meanwhile, had other thoughts.

"I do really appreciate your generosity," she just about purred, fixing Naruto with a vaguely sultry stare. "It's such a shame I can never convince you to stick around. Kiri could certainly use a young, powerful, eligible bachelor such as yourself."

"Mei, you are twice my age," Naruto deadpanned.

Ao stiffened, and Mei's eye twitched. "Yes, I'm well aware of that fact. You make a habit of reminding me."

"Who else would if I didn't?" Naruto snickered before ducking a kunai that slammed into the wall on the other side of the room.

"Anyway," Mei grumbled as she massaged her right temple through her long, auburn hair, "Utakata and I finalized the details of the trade agreement and mutual defense pact between Kiri and Ame. Akatsuki's path to diplomatic peace is underway."

Naruto grinned. "Fantastic. Is he still in the village?"

"No, unfortunately, you just missed them," Mei said with a shake of her head before retrieving two scrolls from her desk and sliding them to Naruto. "He and Hotaru departed for Ame yesterday. Here's your payment for your services in retrieving our wayward swords, as well as the bounty for Raiga."

Naruto smirked and pocketed the scrolls with a flourish. "Two bounties in one mission. Is that a record, Karin?"

Karin merely rolled her eyes amidst Naruto's gloating.

Deep within Kubisaki Pass, a duo of men wearing bloody, black cloaks with a violet moon emblazoned on the chest were exiting a crumbling castle. Kakuzu, holding a summoning contract in one hand and the severed head of a daimyo in the other, suddenly stopped in his tracks and looked up into the clear sky.

"Kakuzu, the fuck are you standing around for? Hurry your ass up, I've got sacrifices to make!" Hidan shouted in annoyance, wanting to get this stupid mission done with as soon as possible.

"I feel a great disturbance in the Force…" Kakuzu muttered as he narrowed his green eyes over red sclera.

"The fuck are you on about?" Hidan questioned.

Kakuzu remained silent for a moment before he nodded (at what, Hidan had no clue) and continued walking. "I have competition. Hopefully he'll have a bounty of his own to collect after I take his heart."

"Ugh, it's always about money with you, you damn heathen."

"Shut up, pinko."

"That'll be everything for today, then," Mei stated, wrapping the meeting up. "You and Karin are free to spend as long as you'd like in the village before you set back off."

"Thanks, but we'll probably head out tomorrow," Naruto replied. "It's been too long since I've been back home."

"Oh?" Mei questioned with a smirk, smelling blood and deciding to pounce. "Someone special back at Ame?"

"If there was, she'd definitely be age-appropriate," Naruto dryly quipped before flickering out of the room with Karin in tow just in time to avoid a glob of lava that slammed into the spot he had just occupied.

"Ugh, that quick, little shit," Mei groaned with a twitching eyebrow, though she was doing a splendid job of hiding the mirth she was swimming in.

"Lady Mizukage, why do you allow him to speak to you so cavalierly?" Ao questioned.

The dry stare Mei gave the man almost made him regret asking. "Because he's the only man around here with the balls to do it. Besides, Karin is precious."

"Still, though, is being so casual and comfortable with him wise?" Ao continued.

"Just say what's actually on your mind, Ao," Mei sighed, nearing the end of her patience with the man dancing around the subject.

Ao was momentarily taken aback by his boss's perceptiveness, but he quickly regained himself and complied. "If we lower our guard too much around him, we may potentially leave ourselves open to attack. Akatsuki is a mercenary organization; they have no strict ties or loyalty to any particular village beyond Ame, and it's not unreasonable to think that they'll take a job that goes against our own interests if offered a large enough sum. We're friendly now because we paid for their assistance in the rebellion, but we could be on the opposite side of the next battle if someone commissions them against us."

"I can certainly see where you're coming from, and I understand your concerns," Mei began, closing her eyes as she considered her next words. "However, Akatsuki isn't just a mercenary organization. In fact, I'd wager that doing mercenary work is simply a means to an end for them. I've gotten to know Naruto really well, and I can confidently say that their group's only desire is peace; it's simply that the path to peace is often treacherous. He used the expression of 'cracking a few eggs to make an omelette' during one of our lengthy conversations on the subject."

"So, you trust that he's genuine?" Ao asked.

"I do," she nodded. "Naruto is many things, but he's nothing if not genuine.

"I suppose," Ao sighed, though he still wasn't convinced. "I'll still be wary of him, though. It could still just be an elaborate ruse for a greater nefarious scheme down the line, even if he himself is just a cog in a larger machine."

Mei sighed, and she fixed her righthand with an impatient glare at the implication that she was being manipulated. "Ao, I mean this with the utmost respect. Please let me worry about that. If Naruto ever did become an enemy of Kiri, then only one of us in this room could actually do anything about it in the first place."

"…Point taken," Ao conceded, despite how much that stung his pride. She wasn't wrong.

Pakura sighed in contentment. A soak in an onsen was exactly what she needed after the shitstorm in Iwa and the nonstop travel to Naruto directly afterward. This was the first time she had gotten to truly relax in far too long, and she was going to take advantage of every minute of it. Closing her eyes, she slowly sank even further into the hot spring until she was submerged from the neck up.

Slight ripples in the water brought her eyes back open, however, and she witnessed another occupant joining the soak in the other side of the spring. She initially disregarded the teen as she took her sandy blonde hair out of the four pigtails it was put up in, but her full attention was captured after 5 seconds of the teen staring right at her in what looked to be shock. Pakura only blankly stared back at her without uttering a word until the other girl realized what was happening, and she flushed in embarrassment before looking away.

"Sorry," she quickly apologized. "You just look really familiar… like someone who's-"

"Supposed to be dead? I get that a lot," Pakura amusedly finished the girl's statement for her.

The girl's teal eyes widened before narrowing in suspicion. "Okay, now I know I recognize you, and I know you're supposed to be dead."

Pakura couldn't fight the sardonic chuckle that escaped her. "You're not from around here, are you?"

The girl blinked in surprise. "…No, why?"

"Because I can tell. We're from the same place."

"So, it IS you!"

"Guilty."

The sandy blonde nearly sputtered as her brain ran a mile a minute. "I- bu- how are you alive??"

"Your father sucks at assassinations," her tone was as dry as the desert they both hailed from.

"…You know who I am?"

"Of course, I'd recognize Karura's face anywhere."

The girl wasn't sure if she could be thrown even further for a loop at this point. "…You knew my mother?"

"You sure are asking a lot of questions," Pakura snorted, enjoying messing around with the scattered teenager.

"Sorry, I- ugh, what the hell am I doing getting flustered like this?" she bemoaned in budding frustration at her lack of composure.

"You're fine, trust me; I know it's a lot to take in," she assured. "Temari, right?"

"…Yeah," she nodded, accepting by now that there was no limit to how taken aback she could be in this conversation. "I'm surprised you remember me."

Pakura merely shrugged. "Your mother and I weren't the best of friends, but we were friendly enough. I knew all of your names, at least."

Temari nodded, growing more comfortable with the admittedly absurd situation as time went on. "So, what exactly happened? In the academy, we're only told that Iwa-nin ambushed and killed you during your ambassador mission to Kiri. Clearly, that isn't the case."

"So, that's the story they ran with, huh?" Pakura mused, drawing further intrigue from Temari. "I was never intended to make it to Kiri. The squad I was sent with attacked me on orders from the Kazekage and left me for dead. But, as I said, your father sucks at assassinations. They should've cut my head off."

"Well, shit…" Temari lowly responded at the revelation. "Where have you been all these years, then? I get why you never came back to the village, but I'd figure you would've wanted revenge at some point."

Pakura sighed, and her tone became a touch more morose. "I'd be lying if I said that the betrayal didn't hurt… quite a bit. You spend your life protecting and defending your home, family, and comrades with your life, only to be cut down and discarded like trash without a second thought."

She chuckled, but it lacked any measure of humor. "It really makes you bitter about the unrelenting callousness of this shinobi world of ours. It's just a cruel reminder that at the end of the day, you're not a person. You're a tool to be used, abused, and discarded at the whims of a Kage that only got lucky enough to beat the system and no longer have to be that tool. There was never a place for humanity in our profession. So, I suppose I'd also be lying if I said I wasn't expecting something of the sort, especially from Rasa. Simply put, your father was a paranoid jackass obsessed with maintaining the power he had by any means."

Well, that was certainly a lot for Temari to take in, and it showed on her dumbstruck face.

"I guess to actually answer your question," Pakura continued, sparing the girl the awkward tension, "I stayed away because the idea of returning was too painful, even if it was only to kill that treacherous bastard. Make no mistake, I definitely wanted to… but, honestly, what would've been the point? I make my grand return, kill him, and then I'm at the top of the bingo book and have the entirety of my home along with any other opportunists after my head?"

The older woman sighed, and Temari could feel every bit of the exhaustion in that sigh. "It was just easier to stay dead."

"That sounds incredibly demoralizing. I'm sorry that happened to you."

"Eh, I'm mostly over it."

Temari didn't believe that for a second, but she wouldn't press.

"I'm sorry if I'm coloring your perception of your father with my sob story," Pakura joked.

"Oh, don't worry, my father was a career asshole," Temari assured with a shake of her head. "I don't particularly miss him now that I know he's been dead for over two months."

"Not gonna lie, I was a little miffed when I heard about that," Pakura revealed with a small smile. "I had dibs on him, whenever that day would come. I at least got to see the corpse of that kill-stealing bitch, Orochimaru, though."

"Wait, Orochimaru is dead??" Temari asked in surprise.

"Mhm. You can thank Akatsuki for that," Pakura confirmed.

"Akatsuki?" Temari questioned. She had vaguely heard of them from snippets of her father's conversations with Suna's council. Apparently, they had some recent business in Kiri, but that was all she knew.

"Yep. It's where I've been, since I know that's what you were working towards asking. Your attempts at fishing for information haven't exactly been subtle."

A light pink dusted on Temari's face upon being made, and she scoffed while sheepishly looking away. "Can you blame me? Betrayed or not, you're still pretty much a legend in Suna. Excuse me for being curious what THE Pakura of the Scorch Release has been up to."

"Fair enough," Pakura conceded with a smirk.

"Why tell me your story, though?" the teen asked, and Pakura quirked her eyebrow at her in an unspoken request fir her to expound. "I mean, why tell a Suna kunoichi about her village's hidden betrayal? Seems like a conflict of interest."

Pakura snorted. "Let's just pretend for a minute that you aren't a political prisoner with an ANBU detail in a village you failed to invade and that any of that information isn't completely useless to you right now."

Temari's blush deepened, and Pakura continued with a vindicated smirk. "That's what I thought. Even without that caveat, what could you possibly do with any of that information? Take it back to Suna and reveal that Pakura of the Scorch Release is alive and aligned with Akatsuki? If Akatsuki became an enemy of Suna, then congratulations, Suna's days would be even more numbered than they already are."

Temari had to concede that the woman had a point. She remained silent for a long moment while she mulled over what was said and formulated her rapid thoughts into something coherent.

"I don't think you should be an enemy of the village in the first place," the sandy blonde finally spoke, and she only received a derisive laugh in return.

"Well, become Kazekage, and then you could make that decision yourself," Pakura dismissed, closing her eyes to continue her soak.

"…Alright. I will."

Pakura's eyes snapped open, and her confused, brown gaze met a teal pair brimming with resolve. "Huh?"

"You're not the only one that our village has hurt, that my father has hurt," Temari said, sadness coloring her tone. "My little brother didn't deserve the life he was forced into, and my father only made it worse. He turned him into a monster."

Temari sighed, sinking ever so slightly into the water. "I'm not blameless, either. I've spent the last 6 years being afraid of him when he desperately needed someone to be there for him. I avoided him instead of assuring him that his existence mattered. I helped create what he is now, all because I was a coward."

Pakura didn't quite know what any of that had to do with becoming Kazekage, but she wasn't going to interrupt the girl clearly working through her own inner turmoil seemingly for the first time after she had just trauma-dumped her own life story onto the girl.

Temari took another shaky breath. "What you said earlier about our profession robbing us of our humanity… it shouldn't be that way. Things need to change, and it starts at the top. I'll work my way to the top and help fix our broken system so that no one else has to end up like you or my brother again."

The two sat in silence as the girl's words marinated. Pakura couldn't say she wasn't supremely surprised by the girl's new ambitions. "That's a pretty tall order. You sure you're up to it?"

Temari nodded, the rawest of determination shining both on her face and in her tone. "I don't care. I'll do whatever it takes."

"Well, you have my support, for whatever that's worth," Pakura responded after another moment of silence.

"Thanks," Temari replied, a faint smile breaking through.

"Is your brother a jinchuriki?" Pakura asked, and when Temari nodded, a fond smile of her own came over the woman. "Mine, too."

"What?"

"Nothing," she shook her head, but the smile remained.

Tayuya bounded through the trees alongside the rest of the Sound Four on their way to Konoha with a scowl. That in and of itself wasn't out of the ordinary. What was, however, was how uncharacteristically silent she was all the while. Usually, the foul-mouthed redhead would be calling Jirobo a useless, fat fuck or verbally sparring with Sakon/Ukon/whichever dipshit was in control at any given moment.

For the duration of their retrieval mission thus far, she had been visibly angry, and rather than spit her vitriol in all directions like she normally would, she was silently stewing like a pot nearing a boil. Jirobo and Kidomaru wisely kept quiet about it and focused on the task at hand to avoid igniting the powder keg. Sakon, however, did not have such restraint. Every so often, Tayuya's scowl would darken even further, and she'd incrementally fall behind as she got lost in her hate-fueled thoughts until she'd notice and catch back up. He ignored it the first time and brushed it off the second time, but it irritated him after the third time. Now, it had become a repeated issue, and she was falling behind the group once again and taking even longer to catch back up.

It was really starting to piss him off.

"Hey, Tayuya," Sakon barked behind them. "I know you're on the rag, but pick up the fucking pace. Your slow ass is lagging behind again."

"Fuck off, you androgynous cunt!" she spat with significantly more venom than what was typical. The abundance of disdain in her tone got the attention of Jirobo and Kidomaru.

Meanwhile, it only pissed Sakon off even more, that was until his blue lips contorted into a dark smirk. "Not my fault whatever's got your discharge-stained panties in a bunch is distracting you. Maybe we'll get lucky, and Lord Orochimaru will cut your ass loose and hand you over to Kabuto to fuck around with."

There was a brief moment of silence upon which Sakon turned away from her, assuming she had finally shut her mouth and shaped up. However, the racket had woken his sleeping brother just in time for him to see the kunai headed straight for his forehead, and he jerked their conjoined body out of the way of the projectile before it sank into a tree just ahead with a loud thunk. Sakon stopped and turned toward Tayuya, but the sight he was faced with gave him pause.

"Wanna run that by me again?" Tayuya frigidly spoke, her brown eyes shooting a murderous glare at the white-haired teen.

The jagged, zigzag pattern gliding across her fair skin indicated that the first stage of her cursed seal was activated, and her flute was locked in her clutches and mere inches away from her mouth, ready to unleash hell on her teammate at a moment's notice. Sakon snarled and responded in kind, the curved, blotchy pattern of his own cursed seal manifesting on his pale skin. Before anyone could make a move, Kidomaru dropped between them and extended his six arms to keep them away from each other.

"Yo, this really isn't the time for friendly fire," Kidomaru stressed. "You two can kill each other after we get back to Oto, but Lord Orochimaru wants the Uchiha posthaste. We can't waste time with this."

Jirobo could have pulled out a kunai and cut through the tension in the air if he really wanted to. He silently watched Sakon scoff and recede his cursed seal before turning away, setting back off in the direction of their destination. Kidomaru sighed and followed, and Jirobo wasn't too far behind. Tayuya, meanwhile, was barely restraining herself. Her skin was hot with rage just begging to be spilled on the rest of them, Kabuto, Orochimaru, and everyone back at Oto.

The worst part was that she still had no fucking idea as to why.

The next day, after having satisfied her desire for another lengthy soak, Pakura found herself wandering the village and taking in the plentiful green of Hi no Kuni. She did so knowing full well how uncomfortable she was making both the civilian and shinobi populations, while also not particularly caring. Honestly, the wary glances she was getting from every which way when they spotted her headband was too amusing for her to pass up.

She was spending way too much time around Naruto.

She did notice that of the stares she received, it was the older shinobi in particular who often looked like they had seen a ghost when they looked in her direction. It was to be expected, as a lot of people still assumed she was dead, especially those faces she vaguely recognized from the war. The younger shinobi, on the other hand, saw her headband and immediately scowled, but upon a second glance, their faces would twist in confusion when they finally noticed the slash. Clearly, she wasn't loyal to Suna, so they weren't sure what to do with that moment of righteous fury, and it launched them into a brief but obvious crisis.

It was pretty damn hilarious.

Currently, she had stopped at a dango stand and decided to indulge. Dango, like onsens, was pretty hard to come by in Suna and Ame, and she was basically on vacation, so she would treat herself to a foreign treat or two. The dango in the village must have been top tier if the kunoichi in the trench coat's wall art made of discarded dango sticks was anything to go by.

Halfway through her enjoyment of the sweet dish, she was finally joined by the figure she sensed keeping an eye on her from just outside of the stand (or, at least, one of the many presences keeping an eye on her in the village). She barely spared him a glance when he sat down at the table across from her, and he pulled out an orange book and began to put up the front of reading.

"I was wondering when you'd finally have a seat," Pakura commented before taking another bite of dango from her stick. This was good shit.

"I figured you knew I was there," the man in question hummed, not taking his gaze away from the pages of his book.

"So, to what do I owe the pleasure of a visit from the son of the White Fang?" Pakura cut straight to the point.

Kakashi shut his book and set his visible eye on the woman. His gaze was assessing but harbored no suspicion or accusation, only curiosity. Pakura took note of the prominent stress lines marring the man's clearly exhausted face, despite the nonchalant front he was trying to put up. She didn't know if it was physical exhaustion, emotional exhaustion, or an unfortunate combination of the two.

"I'm surprised you haven't asked what my business in Konoha is, yet," Pakura spoke up, opting to push the conversation along.

"You're wearing the same cloak as Naruto, so I know you're not a threat to the village," Kakashi easily responded. "Besides, I know who you are."

"Do you?" she asked, not terribly surprised.

Kakashi nodded. "My sensei once told me a story about you two collaborating on a mission during the war."

"Who's your sensei?"

"The Yondaime."

She nodded with a hum in recognition. The reason for this conversation was beginning to become clear. "Good guy. Jutsu names were shit, though."

"They often were, indeed," Kakashi agreed, and then he hesitated. "Does Naruto…?"

"Yeah, he's aware," she answered, knowing exactly what the man was asking.

This took Kakashi aback. "How did he find out?"

Pakura took another bite of dango from her stick and swallowed before answering. "Something about chakra imprints in the seal. He didn't really go into too much detail. It was a lot for him to process, so I didn't push."

A contemplative silence followed on Kakashi's end, and Pakura merely let him gather his thoughts until he was ready. "How does he feel about it?"

"Detached, I guess," she shrugged. "For as long as I've known him, he seems pretty content with the parent he has."

"So, he's at least been taken care of," Kakashi sighed with a measure of relief.

"As much as any runaway jinchuriki can be, I suppose," Pakura replied.

Kakashi snorted. "When I saw him in Nami, it was hard to believe that it was the same malnourished troublemaker that used to terrorize the village in a bid for any sort of attention. He looked so much like his father, as well as his mother."

Pakura furrowed her brow at the comment, but she had to remind herself that he most likely meant Naruto's biological mother. Kakashi, deep in his wistful remembrance, didn't catch the momentary confusion.

"Well, I have a mission to take care of while they sort out who the next Hokage is," he finally said as he stowed away his book. "Say, since you came in with Lord Jiraiya and Lady Tsunade, you wouldn't happen to be privy to who was selected, would you?"

"…If I was, I feel like I shouldn't say," Pakura carefully answered, and Kakashi nodded.

"Understandable. I only asked because there's a betting pool amongst the jonin. Tsunade is currently in the lead, but Jiraiya isn't too far behind."

"I can at least guarantee that it isn't TonTon," Pakura stated.

Pakura could've sworn that she heard the man curse under his breath and resolve to change his bet, but she may have just been hearing things.

Sasuke's fists impacted the training post with a loud crash in his desperate attempt to deposit all of the turmoil he was experiencing. The mood around the village had been somber since the death of the Sandaime, but that wasn't affecting him nearly as much as something else about the invasion: Gaara.

Sasuke thought he had grown strong enough to take the violent enigma down. He improved his speed to match and surpass that of Rock Lee, the only person to put a scratch on Gaara. He trained his Sharingan to the cornea to perceive and counter every detail of his sand attacks and defense. He mastered the Chidori specifically to penetrate the redhead's ultimate defense.

And yet…

The image of his teammate being crushed to a bloody pulp within a Sand Coffin flashed in his mind once again, and it was accompanied by the haunting, maniacal cackling of the half-transformed redhead as he murdered him.

Sasuke slammed his now bloody fist into the post to fight off the cold sweat that threatened to overcome him. Not even the boost provided by the cursed seal was enough to match that psychotic monster. It was barely enough to get himself and Sakura out of dodge when Gaara decided to fully transform into a giant monstrosity made completely of sand. Sasuke knew he was way out of his depth, and had it not been for a timely intervention by a man with long, white hair alongside an ANBU that inexplicably possessed the Shodai's Wood Release, Team 7 wouldn't have survived.

And yet, they hadn't really survived, had they? One of them was dead.

And it was Sasuke's own fault.

He was far too weak. He always was.

He was an unequivocal failure.

He couldn't protect his family from Itachi, he could barely even protect himself from Zabuza and the hunter-nin, he was woefully outclassed by Orochimaru in the Forest of Death, and he was utterly useless against Gaara when he went berserk. Because of his weakness, he failed to protect his team. His teammate's blood was on his hands because he was just too fucking weak to do anything. He was the same weak, useless little wretch that Itachi didn't find any purpose in killing.

At that thought, his neck exploded into feverish pain, and he fell to his knees in agony. Silky smooth whispers of giving into his hatred, promises of power, and the death of his brother crawled into his ear canal like a vampiric worm, gnawing away at his will and sanity alike. He couldn't help but entertain the ramblings of a madman that offered him a way out, a rebirth into a better existence, a path to power.

The power he wanted.

The power he needed.

A small, dark green diving toad poked his head above the surface of the massive lake adjacent to Ame, and he opened his mouth to allow a large, human arm to pull itself out. That arm belonged to Jiraiya the Gallant, though he felt decidedly less gallant pulling himself out of the stomach of a toad for the Hiding in a Toad Jutsu. Nevertheless, it was necessary in order to assure his entrance into Amegakure. He knew that Naruto sent advanced warning to Konan and Nagato of his impending arrival, but he wouldn't chance it.

In other words, it was just easier to make it inside and apologize later than to fiddle with checking in with gate guards. They'd understand, right?

"Thanks, Gamasensui," Jiraiya thanked the diving toad beside him for the trip.

"This place reeks of Salamanders," Gamasensui croaked uneasily. "Don't die, you still have to pass on the contract."

"Is that all I'm worth to you guys?" Jiraiya asked, dramatically feigning hurt.

"…Are we talking right now?" Gamasensui deadpanned.

"Get out of here," Jiraiya sighed, and the toad retreated back under the surface.

"Are you done, Sensei?" came a dry yet melodious voice above him, snapping his attention away from the water.

When Jiraiya turned and looked up at the figure, he witnessed an angel hovering in the rain above him with large wings made of paper stretching out of her back. The silky, blue hair up in a bun sitting above the cold, amber eyes staring down at him froze the man in place. He already knew they were alive, but actually seeing it with his own eyes…

"Konan…" Jiraiya exhaled.

"We've been expecting you."

I've got a few ideas for how the Sasuke Retrieval Mission will go, and one of them involves killing off a character I planned on keeping around for a little while (but would ultimately just end up dying later to someone else). I'll mull it over for a little while, but I'll probably just end up going with the path of greatest volume of violence.

Thanks for reading.