I have never written a character x reader before, seemed like something fun to do. Sorry I didn't write it in the usual perspective that is common for character x reader, I just can't stand writing in 2nd person and wanted to give it a try with 1st person.
Thank you to everyone who read, I hope you enjoy!
Warning: some swearing

Limbo. Yeah, that's the best way to describe it. The feeling, I mean. Since I've been sent back home to my universe, dimension, timeline, arachno-humanoid poly multiverse - whatever the hell people want to call it.

It's just been a feeling of emptiness, of being incomplete.

For the first time in my life I had found a group, granted a large group of people who were just like me. I met someone, someone who I thought I was close to, well enough to let me stick around at least, but no.

I can't even say what I did wrong, I thought things were going well. The different timelines were a mess, sure, but we were all working together to fix them. I thought everything was fine-

What did he say while that scary machine was webbing around me to take me home?

"El tiempo todo lo cura."

He looked very sad when he said that, a phrase I wish I understood to this day. I was trying to learn Spanish while I was at Nueva York, but I didn't pick it up as fast as I liked. I was one of the only amongst the other spider people that wasn't a scientist, or physicist, or geneticist - I was just a girl that got lucky with a spider bite I guess. Maybe if I was smarter I could've learned the language fully.

"This is for your own good!"

Those words still haunt me. How could sending me home be for my own good? I'm all alone, I literally have nobody.

It was an upsetting scene, I could see the general confusion and shock on my friends faces who reluctantly watched me get 'spirited away'. I glanced tearfully into his eyes, my hands pressing against the barrier and I swear I saw a look of desperation in his red irises.

Maybe I'm just fooling myself, but I know what I was told, I know I'm not crazy. But then again, maybe I'm clinging onto every little sign that he would want me to come back.

Miguel…

I try to shake my thoughts from distracting me further, I am swinging from building to building after all, I don't want to miss and fall. I've done that plenty of times, and it absolutely sucks. These last few months have been a blur. I just fight crime and go about my day, listening to music and trying to keep the depression at bay the best I can. No intense villains have really risen to the occasion of challenging me, the streets have been very quiet. I know I'm a newer Spider person, so I haven't drummed up enough attention yet.

I find a rooftop to rest at and sit at the edge, dangling my feet off the side. I peer down at my wrists, longing for my dimension travel watch to magically reappear, but I am constantly disappointed.

I wish I was a genius like the other Spider people, maybe then I could build my own watch and take myself back to where I really belong. My brain runs itself ragged trying to replay my last days at the headquarters, trying to figure out what I did wrong to make Miguel send me home.

I rest my head back on the hard concrete of the rooftop and close my eyes. The sun is setting and there's a bit of a chill in the air. The sound of honking cars is distant enough for this moment to be peaceful. I try to focus, replaying that final day in my head like a movie.

Maybe I should start from the beginning, a day and a half before that day.

Flashback: The Gift

"Hell, give it here." Hobie had his hand extended out, expectedly waiting for me to hand the gift over. I kept it anxiously hidden behind my back, wishing to Neptune I had never listened to his advice.

"C'mon, girl, I know your taste of music isn't that bad."

Jess started approaching from the corridor, rounding the corner quickly like she had someone on her mind. She glanced up at us, arching her brow in curiosity.

Great. Another person to watch me embarrass myself.

"What's going on here?" Jess asked, walking up to the both of us and crossing her arms.

"Nothing." I answered quickly, my voice very hoarse and dry.

"She made Miguel a gift and is 'fraid to give it to him." Hobie replied, glancing back at me with a devilish smile.

God, sometimes I hated him! I could feel my face heating up and my forehead start to bead sweat.

"Oh? Is that so?" Jess looked over at me, a similar grin spreading on her face. "What did you get him?"

"Nothing, it's nothing!" I uttered back, shooting Hobie an angry look.

"There's no reason to be shy, besides wouldn't you like to run it by us before you give it to him?"

I softened my grip on the gift that I still kept hidden. Jess was right, besides I know Jess and Hobie weren't the type to gossip.

I decided to show them, holding out a small cassette tape with a plastic box around it.

"What is this?" Jess questioned.

"She kept it old school, yeah?" Hobie nodded.

He was the one who suggested something homemade. I loved music so I made him a mixtape of songs I think he'd enjoy, and songs I enjoy that he's caught me listening to.

"You made him a tape?" Jess' demeanor completely changed, she put her hand over her heart, her voice was soft and almost awestruck.

"Yeah, but it's not a big de-" I started.

"Not a big deal, are you kidding? This is the cutest thing I've ever seen!" Jess gushed, picking up the tape and examining it lovingly.

I felt myself blush again, breaking eye contact from the two of them. Maybe I didn't make the right choice creating this mixtape judging by Jess' reaction, I wanted to give Miguel something to show him I care, but the gesture might be seen as too romantic or over the top. Or it could be the opposite, maybe he won't care at all.

"The girl is goin' to give it to him today, if she's brave 'nuff at least." Hobie informed Jess.

"Do you think it's stupid? Please be honest." I pipe up.

Hobie shook his head.

"This is a wonderful gift, sounds like the test of true love to me." Jess replied, handing the tape back.

Love?!

"Whoa, hang on! Who said anything about love? That's a super strong word to try and compare my friendship to… I mean-" I try to stammer my way out of the awkwardness, but Jess had pinpointed me to a T as usual.

Jess chucked softly and shook her head: "You two are funny. My intuition is never wrong about these things, I know the both of you like each other."

"Just give it to him an' let us know how it goes," Hobie interjected, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he began to slink away. "I 'ave faith in you, love!"

"Thanks…" I mumbled in reply, not feeling very confident even after the reassurance.

Miguel was always easy to find, up on that platform thing watching those virtual screens that Lyla would project, as usual. I know he had to bear the responsibility of keeping the multiverse together for the other Spiders, but I would often catch a glimpse of him watching recordings of his daughter.

My heart ached for him, I can't imagine holding your baby girl and watching her disappear and fade away into nothing. There's no closure for something like that, at least in death a body is usually left over, but not with this. "Deleted" was the word Lyla used for it, but never around Miguel. Even for an AI she had some sensitivity installed in her or something, knowing better than to speak that way around him. Lyla explained to me once that a universe getting destroyed erases everything, down to the atoms. I can't imagine a worse fate.

Miguel's platform started to lower slowly (very slowly). I rehearsed what I was going to tell him over and over again in my head, my heart pounding in my chest so fast I swear it was visible under my skin.

"Hi, Miguel." I greeted, giving him a slight wave.

Miguel cleared the virtual interface with a swipe of his arm, stepping down from the platform. He looked like he had a lot on his mind, making me question if this was even the right time to drop this bomb on him.

"Hey, Sunshine." He replied, his tone quieted.

Sunshine was a nickname Peter B Parker coined for me, and it just ended up kind of sticking.

"I-uh, can I talk to you privately for a moment?"

I managed to form a damn sentence at least.

Miguel approached, his frame towered over mine. He arched his brow in curiosity, his deep set eyes peering down at me.

"Is everything okay?" He questioned

"Oh yeah everything's fine, I just would rather not have an audience, you know?"

Miguel glanced around the corridor, furrowing his brow in confusion as he looked back at me.

"There's no one but us here." He stated.

"I know, I mean… Lyla." I whispered her name, hoping she wouldn't hear but of course she did.

"Dang, tell me how you really feel." Lyla materialized beside me, her deadpan delivery and expression were clear.

"I'm sorry, it's just private." I apologized to her, hoping she wouldn't give me a hard time.

"Kind of hard to say anything without her hearing. Lyla, stay in here, we'll go to the next room." Miguel responded, motioning for me to follow him.

"Uhhh, Miguel, I'm a computer program I'm literally everywhere, I'm not in any one physical location."

Miguel pinched his nose in irritation: "I know Lyla, I'm aware. Just don't go snooping around and eavesdrop, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever you say, boss." She waved him off, flickering out of view.

Miguel huffed and stormed off, I followed quickly behind him, trying to stifle my smile. It was amusing how much Lyla could tease him and get under his skin, considering the AI was literally his and programmed that way. I've asked him before how she was created, but he refused to tell anyone the backstory.

We entered a small room that looked like it was once a janitor closet in this enormous building. Now it was just a place to store outdated tech.

"Okay, what did you want to tell me?" Miguel turned to face me, brushing his hair back in slight irritation (still a little huffy from Lyla, he seemed extra moody today.)

"Oh, right." I laughed nervously.

Great, I can feel my face heating up again. The tape was in my pocket, I could feel it pressing against my leg. Miguel waited with his arms crossed, staring down at me, expectedly.

I decided to just come out and say it, maybe the biggest mistake of my life. It's hard to tell, that day was super confusing and feels so jumbled in my head.

I pulled out the tape and handed it over to him. He took it, examining it curiously. I realized while he was studying the cassette that he was literally from the future and probably has no way to listen to the mixtape.

I'm such an idiot.

"It's a tape, I uh, made it for you." I said as I rubbed the back of my neck. "It's a mixtape of music that you like, I'm sorry I wasn't even thinking about a cassette player or if there's even one around here."

"This is an interesting gift, what's the occasion?" Miguel asked, his tone much softer than before.

I shrugged trying to play it off casual and failing miserably.

"It's kind of a thing back in my universe, or well other universes to create mixtapes or burn CDs as gifts for people you care about. Well I mean it used to be, not sure about now." I explained, the words spilled out quickly. "I just wanted to make you something and show you that I care."

Miguel looked back down at the mixtape. He rubbed his chin for a second, then went to glance at something on the wall. If I didn't know any better I would have said he was fidgeting like he was nervous, but given his reaction I probably read him wrong.

"That's uh, very kind of you, Sunshine, thank you." He replied.

There were a few moments of awkward silence. I could cut the tension with a knife and it was driving me crazy so I just blurted it out.

"Fuck it, I really like you, Miguel."

My heart felt like it was going to explode, I could feel my hands trembling so badly I kept them pinned to my sides.

There was another long, agonizing silence. I heard Miguel sigh, he placed his hands on his hips and studied the ground.

"Look, Sunshine-" He started.

I held my breath waiting for his response, but his body language already had me expecting the worst.

"Miguel, you're being requested. I tried to tell them you were in a "meeting" but it's urgent apparently." Lyla pinged him.

Miguel let out a harsh breath, letting her know he'd be there soon. My heart sank, I felt like curling up on the floor and staying there for the rest of my life.

Miguel approached, placing his hands gently on my shoulders. His touch lit up a warm feeling in my stomach like a flame.

"We'll talk later, I promise."

With that he left, leaving me hanging on those last words. Little did I know this is probably what set the beginning of the end in motion.

Miguel's Perspective

Lyla's timing was always incredibly unorthodox. Picturing her face, looking so defeated from his dismissal made a wave of melancholy wash over him. He promised himself he would never get attached again, he knew how the story ended - it ended the same in every universe for him. She was different though, and the last thing he wanted to do was crush her spirit, but a small infatuation was something anybody could get over with time.

Time. One thing he felt he was running out of in terms of relativity, but also had way too much of.

Jess was waiting for him in one of the hallways, a coy smile forced on her face.

"You seem giddy about something," Miguel mumbled, brushing by her.

"What makes you say that?" Jess could hardly keep her voice steady.

"Did you have Lyla interrupt me?" He asked, his irritation returning.

"Why? Did I interrupt something important?"

Miguel stopped and turned on his heel to face her. Judging by the look on her face he could read that she was in on the whole "mixtape" thing.

"Well, how did it go?" Jess asked, not even waiting for him to say it aloud. "Aw, you're blushing, this is a side of you I've never seen before."

"Enough, Jess! We aren't children in school, this is ridiculous."

"Come on, Miguel, relax!" Jess laughed, trying to calm him down. "You need to lighten up and live a little, you know that girl's intentions were pure, and I hope you didn't hurt her."

Miguel huffed, pinching the bridge of his nose again. He had been over this with Jess before multiple times, yet she still found ways to push these things onto him. He didn't understand what she couldn't grasp about his constant warnings to squash any feelings between any of the Spiders, especially those toward him.

"You know I can't allow it, Jess. We have enough going on as it is, there is no time for fraternization. We have an extremely important task at hand." Miguel explained curtly.

Jess frowned, crossing her arms and shifting her stance:" 'Fraternization?' Are we in the military now?"

"Enough, Jess. Why would you encourage her to do this? Now there's another mess for me to clean up." Miguel tried to walk off again but Jess cut him off.

"Come on, Miguel! This could be really good for you. I know the mission is important, that's not something that needs to be explained to me of all people. But you can't push everything aside while achieving it, you will completely lose yourself! I know we're all part spider, but at the end of the day we are still mostly human."

"You know why I can't, Jess, you know it isn't safe, how many times do I have to explain that to you?!"

Jess rolled her eyes and waved him off, she turned to leave him in the hallway.

"By the way, I wasn't the one who relayed that message to Lyla, it was Reilly. You should probably see what he wants." She said over her shoulder without breaking her stride.

Miguel shook his head and turned in the opposite direction to head back. He knew he was right, it was for her own good. It wasn't safe to be with him, no matter how much he wanted the same thing in return. Relationships have never worked for him in any parallel universe, even on the Earth that Gabriella had been born on, and he couldn't risk losing someone else he loved or cared for ever again. Seclusion to him was the only answer, even though deep in his hardened heart he yearned for the opposite.

It was the only way to keep her safe.