When I first started translating this story into english, almost 30 chapters were already finished. However, as I reread it, I realized for myself that I wanted to tell this story differently, and so I decided to rewrite the chapters that were already finished, starting with chapter 9.
Part 9
At dinner time, the kitchen in Grimmauld Place was bustling with life. Molly Weasley had once again outdone herself and conjured up a feast for those present, for the Order and for her family.
Percy and Katie sat next to each other on the bench. All the while, Katie could sense Molly Weasley's eyes on her. You know, the disapproving looks she was shooting her way. Oh, she knew Molly Weasley didn't like her. She didn't like that Katie and Percy were in a relationship.
It was then that Katie felt a sudden pressure on her hand. She felt Percy squeeze her hand. Turning her head, Katie smiled at him. Silently his lips formed a few words, formed an 'I love you'.
Unfortunately, this small gesture did not go unnoticed. Molly Weasley absolutely did not like what she was seeing. Oh, and she already knew what she was going to do about it.
"Oh, Percy, there's a lovely young girl who works in your father's department. You should definitely meet her. Maybe you can have lunch together sometime, perhaps tomorrow," Molly suddenly said.
Percy looked at his mother in surprise. Actually, he should be used to that from her and he should know what to say to her. However, one of his brothers beat him to it.
"Percy does have Katie. No need for him to meet another lovely young girl," Fred countered, putting a heavy emphasis on the word lovely. Well, he didn't like his mother interfering in their lives. After all, it wasn't because she was the mother of them all that she knew as to what was best for her children. Although she only had one thing in mind, that all of her children should be happy.
She wanted Bill to be happy with his Fleur. And Charlie with a nice girl, Nymphadora Tonks wasn't a bad choice in her eyes and well maybe that would mean he finally gave up this obsession with dragons and move back home. Angelina and Alicia were certainly the right women for the twins. And there was no doubt in Molly's mind that her Ginny would one day become Mrs. Potter, just as there was no doubt that Ron and Hermione would one day marry each other.
And for Percy, she would find a nice girl, too.
Yet her children had other plans, at least some of them.
" We know you want us to be happy. Yet you don't see that we've already found our happiness." said Fred, also tired of her constant attempts to make decisions for her children. Over and over again, she interfered in her children's lives. It was no wonder that Charlie had literally fled to Romania and Bill had spent so many years in Egypt.
" So I am your mother and I think I know what will make you truly happy."
" If you did, you would have noticed long ago that Katie and Percy are so happy. Did you have a chance to look at them? I mean, really notice them? I can tell right away when Katie enters the room or is nearby. All I have to do is look at Percy. I mean, it's like he can literally feel her presence. Plus, there's this smile that settles on his features every time she's around."
Taken by surprise, Percy looked at his brother.
Well, Percy hadn't thought it was that obvious. Yeah, he loved his Katie, and he could sense when she was nearby right away. Actually, it was a little like she was his soul mate. However, the fact that it was noticeable to the others? Percy hadn't imagined that, not until now anyway.
"Fred, you don't know what you're talking about," Molly disagreed with her son.
"Actually I do, I know what I'm talking about, it's love. Cause that's what exists between Katie and Percy. Love. True love."
Love. A beautiful word, and it was exactly how Percy felt about his Katie. He was in love with Katie. And nothing would change that, not even the fact that he knew the truth about Katie's parents. However, Percy also knew that it would make things more difficult with his mother if she knew the truth about Katie. Once they all learned who Katie's parents were.
After dinner, Katie and Percy had retired to the library. Sitting on the couch, Katie had snuggled into Percy's arms. His fingertips slowly stroked up and down her arm.
"You shouldn't listen to what my mother says. Look, I don't need another woman to be happy. All I need is you," he said softly to her.
"Oh Percy-," Katie sighed.
" No way should you let our mother talk you out of your relationship," they both suddenly heard a voice.
Katie and Percy turned in the direction the voice came from. One of the twins was leaning against the door frame.
" She won't be able to break Katie and me up, no matter how many times she tries to set me up with one girl after another," Percy stated with an air of finality.
"`That's good. You guys can't let it break you up. I need you to be brave, to be strong."
"You' re not here to tell us that, though."
The twin, who Percy was sure was Fred, entered the library and closed the door behind him. Some conversations were better finished behind closed doors.
" Well you know, you guys, I've got to tell you, that I envy you. I mean, just you two showing mom that you belong together. That you're happy. Well, my girlfriend and I aren't that brave. Not yet," Fred said.
Katie and Percy exchanged a meaningful look. They both suspected who Fred was talking about. Hermione Granger. Percy and Katie had noticed the looks Fred and Hermione shared when both of them felt unobserved.
"I don't think we're brave," Katie mused.
"Oh, yes, you are. You are living your love out in the open. No matter how many times Mom tries to convince Percy to date another girl, or how many times she stresses that Percy needs a woman by his side who''ll have his back and take care of the house and kids when he rises up the ranks in the Ministry."
"You know all about Mom's idea of the perfect family life," was all Percy said.
"And I know that she has her own ideas about who should marry whom when the time comes. I mean, she already sees Hermione as the future Misses Weasley, as Misses Ronald Weasley, and not as Misses Fred Weasley," Fred replied sadly.
" You guys will find our way in time, too. A solution that works for both of you," Katie said to Fred.
He just nodded and then left the two alone again.
" You know, if your parents learn the truth about me, then-" Katie began suddenly.
"I don't care. I love you, Katie Bell. The rest of it doesn't matter. It's not our parents who define what we are, it's what we do for ourselves," he declared with utter confidence.
Never before had it bothered him that Katie's parents were Severus Snape and Bellatrix Lestrange. In fact, that would continue to be the case. He didn#t care who her parents were. She was Katie to him. Just Katie. His Katie. And if he had his way, she would eventually be Misses Weasley. Or he would be Mister Black.
However, it scared Katie that the secret about the identity of her parents might someday, maybe very soon, stop being a secret. Sometimes she wondered what it would be like when everyone knew who her parents were. Well, she could only guess. That it would be horrible. That everyone would hate her.
One thing Katie knew with absolute certainty, though, she knew that she wouldn't hurt Percy, she didn't want him to suffer from being the boyfriend of a Death Eaters child. To not suffer from being the boyfriend of Bellatrix Lestrange's daughter.
However, no one had imagined that the truth about Katie's mother would soon become known, or at least that someone would learn about her identity. The day when at least Remus Lupin would learn the truth, however, had come.
It seemed to Severus that he had found a friend in the werewolf. He was a confidant with whom he could talk about his past, with whom he was allowed to talk about it.
A Death Eaters meeting was coming to an end again, and all Severus longed for was a warm bath and a dose of some potion for the pain, as he was held back by someone.
Bellatrix Lestrange had grabbed him by the arm and pulled him into a dark nook. For a moment they looked at each other, and for a brief moment Severus thought he saw something flash in Bellatrix's eyes. You know, something he hadn't seen in her eyes for a long time. For a moment, he wondered which one was standing in front of him at that moment, Bellatrix Lestrange or his Belle.
"Let me see her," Bellatrix said suddenly and without mincing words.
Even without her saying the name, Severus knew exactly who she meant.
There was only one person Bellatrix would want to see, their daughter.
"Never!"
"She's my daughter."
"You don't have a daughter," Severus objected vehemently.
Bellatrix looked at him dumbstruck.
She felt the anger welling up inside her. Severus was being unfair to her. All she wanted was to see her daughter, just once. Just once. Oh, the feeling when she had held her daughter in her arms for the first and only time was the only happy memory she had. And it might even be strong enough to perform a Patronus spell, should she ever try. And now the only thing she wanted was to see this child one more time. To see her child.
"I'm her mother."
"And I'm her father. That's exactly why I have to protect her. From absolutely everything. From evil. I mean, from people who would hurt her." And he didn't say the 'from you' and yet Bellatrix understood those unspoken words.
Yes, she was evil. Oh, so she had done things that the rest of the wizarding world considered to be EVIL. However, Bellatrix had done them with firm belief, and she didn't regret a single thing she had done. Bellatrix believed in the cause. And she believed in Voldemort. Bellatrix would do anything for her Dark Lord.
There was a part of her, though, a very small part, the part that knew she had to protect her daughter. Had to protect Katie, from all the evil in the world. From Dumbledore. From Voldemort.
From herself.
"Please Sev," she repeated hesitantly.
Severus broke free from her grip, however, and walked away without a word.
The whole way back to Hogwarts, that look, her request, followed him. He could not and would not relent, never. As long as he lived, he was going to prevent Bellatrix and Katie from meeting. There was no way to be sure that Bellatrix was not up to something. After all, Katie was the child of prophecy and therefore very valuable to Voldemort.
Deep in thought, he entered his rooms at Hogwarts and at first didn't notice the person sitting on his sofa in front of the fireplace.
Caught off guard, he flinched, and only his years of being a spy prevented him from cursing Remus.
"Damn it, what are you doing here?" he asked angrily.
But he wasn't really angry at Remus, more at himself and at Bellatrix. And at this whole mess they'd been in for years. This mess that a moment of weakness had gotten them into.
"Are you all right?" asked Remus, holding out a vial of potion to Severus.
"Thank you," Severus murmured, reaching for the vial.
He stared thoughtfully at the liquid in the vial. Actually, all he had wanted to do after the meeting was come back to Hogwarts and take the potion to help with the aftereffects of the Cruciatus. Just then, Bellatrix had stopped him.
"Severus?" Remus voice snapped him out of his thoughts.
"What?"
"Is everything all right?"
"I don't know," Severus replied hesitantly.
With Remus, he could be honest and could confide in him what was really bothering him. At least, almost everything, really. However, maybe he could even talk to him about this now. So far, Remus hadn't let anything deter him. And he could use a friend quite badly.
"The meeting was bad, and afterwards, I met someone," he began, flopping down on the sofa next to Remus.
"Someone?" Remus inquired, hoping Severus would keep talking.
"A woman. She and I have a bond, a connection, someone."
"You are talking about Katie's mother?"
Severus only nodded.
"You saw her at the meeting?" Remus asked another question.
If Severus wasn't talking, then he could only hope that if he asked a specific question, it might get him some answers. At least, if Severus would give the answers to him. All he could do was guess.
"And afterwards, too," Severus replied, making it clear that she had almost certainly not been at the meeting to amuse the Death Eaters.
"She's one of them?"
"She wasn't always like that. Once she was a good person, I think."
Remus had a vague guess as to whom Severus was referring to, but he couldn't actually imagine it. This woman could never be a mother, after all. No way.
Then again, maybe the time in Azkaban had changed her, just as Sirius had changed during his years there. So maybe Severus had known another side of her, one that had been erased during the years in Azkaban.
However, he couldn't really be sure with his guess.
He needed to ask Severus to be quite sure.
"You mean Bellatrix Lestrange?" he asked cautiously. Remus said it out loud and now he looked at Severus questioningly.
The latter knew that his answer could change everything. Severus knew that his answer to that question might even tear apart the delicate bonds of friendship that had developed between Remus and him forever.
But Remus did not know the Bellatrix she had once been. He didn't know the Bellatrix who had cradled her baby in her arms, whispering softly to the baby.
She had once been a different Bellatrix. Bellatrix Black, his Belle, the mother of his daughter. A woman he had once had feelings for. At some point, at least.
And even today, there was something that connected him to her. Would forever connect him to her, the child they shared. Katie. Catelyn.
"She used to be very different. Free-spirited, more easy-going, more thoughtful. Not so fanatic in her beliefs. Not bigoted. And not insane, either. The years in Azkaban made a big impact on her, as well as the expectations her family had of her. She used to be a very different person. At one time," Severus replied.
"And you trust her? Still?" Remus just had to know. He had to be sure.
Severus was silent, for a long time. He had to think about the right words. Yes, he had trusted Bellatrix when he had asked her for the blood for the potion. But he didn't trust her enough to let her be around Katie. Not yet. Heck, he didn't even trust himself sometimes.
"I don't know," he admitted truthfully, "She's still her mother. And I guess somehow there's still an ounce of motherly love in her after all. Maybe, anyway. "
"Despite everything she's done?"
" Like me, she's always wanted to protect Katie. That's why we gave her away. That's why she gave me her blood for the spell. Because she wants to protect our daughter. But-" slowly Severus realized that perhaps he had been too quick to judge Bellatrix in that regard.
Still, she was the most fanatical follower of Voldemort. And, at the same time, she was Katie's mother.
And yet, he himself was no better than Bellatrix. He was Dumbledore's spy. And at the same time he also provided Voldemort with information, took part in the Death Eaters' meetings. Though, he didn't believe in it anymore. For Severus, the only thing that mattered was that his daughter was safe.
Needless to say, Remus himself knew very well that things were often not as they seemed. Even Dumbledore was not the kind old man he pretended to be to everyone. To Dumbledore, everyone was just a pawn. In fact, he was the reason why so much remained a secret, why Severus was secretive about his daughter's existence. About the child of the prophecy.
In fact, that's what it was all about. The child of prophecy, Katie, had the power to change everything, to determine the battle between good and evil, and that put her in great danger. Both leaders, the one representing good and the one representing evil, could and would manipulate Katie for their own purposes. So Bellatrix and Severus wanted to protect her from that. In the hands of Voldemort or Dumbledore, she would only be manipulated, used.
" So you gave her away then, because of the prophecy?"
" Well, not only for that. There were so many reasons, but the most important one was, was to keep her safe. That she would have a happy life, one that we could not and can never give her."
At the time, leaving her child and no longer being a part of her life had not been an easy decision, although it had been the right one.
It was the only decision any of them felt they could make, and had to make.
Remus put his hand on Severus' and squeezed it briefly.
He understood what was going on inside Severus and he cared about him too. Well, not only now, but also when he was at one of the meetings. I mean, when he was putting himself in danger for the Order.
In far too much danger for his liking.
"You did the right thing, at the time," Remus declared.
Severus did not speak the words that were on the tip of his tongue. He still doubted whether what they had done had been the right thing. He wondered if it wouldn't have been better if they had made a different decision back then.
Back then, when the spell had revealed to them exactly what the future held in store for them.