Hazbin Hotel: The Million Year Old Sinner

by SenoirNathaniel

Stumbling into the undergrounds of Hell, Vaggie and Charlie meet a towering behemoth of a caveman named Oogar, who had spent most of his years beneath the surface. Oogar joins the two and enters the redemption program at the Hazbin Hotel, where he goes down a perilous path to redemption against powerful demons and his own primordial fears.

17. The Blackbird's Ballad

Millions of Years Ago…

The snow crunched beneath Oogar's boot as the young Neanderthal pressed through the snow-coated tundra, his fur coat providing thin yet warm protection from the frigid winds that swept through the lands. His father was just a few feet up ahead, analyzing his surroundings to see what laid up ahead. The snowfall came to a halt hours ago while a gray and drab horizon loomed over the frozen expanse though, without the hindrance of a roaring blizzard, the path was much clearer for the Neanderthal to make out.

Oogar's father perked his head up sniffed the air for a moment, even in this frozen environment, he was still able to pick up a peculiar scent. Turning his head over to a trail that made its descent down a steep hill, he noticed a few pebbles suddenly sprung up on their own. This was followed by a thunderous 'THUMP' that could be heard at a frequent rate.

The booming noise gradually increased in volume, the sudden realization struck the Neanderthal in the head as he spun around and sprinted towards his son. He let out several grunts and groans, before directing him over to a boulder that sat in the dirt, its top blanketed a sheet of snow. Oogar didn't have time to question as he raced towards the rock alongside his father before hiding behind the massive rock formation. Upon ducking down, Oogar turned to his father to ask what was going on when his ears picked up on the thumping noise that forced him to freeze still like a statue.

The stillness of the tundra was disturbed by a booming screech that could be heard throughout the snow-coated lands. A shadow of gargantuan size eclipsed over the snow and peered into both neanderthal's vision, Oogar couldn't help but hold his spear close with his grip tightening around the shaft. The shadow's culprit revealed itself, trudging its way into eyesight for the two prehistoric wanderers to bear witness to grand sight. A colossal Woolly Mammoth draped its shaggy coat and towering over the various other creatures that shared their frigid environment with it, proudly stomped through the tundra. Its footprints stamped into the snow beneath it as the behemoth pressed onward in its freezing habitat.

Widening his eyes at the leviathan-sized beast that cast a shadow over him, a hard look surfaced on Oogar's face as he slowly rose to his feet while reading his spear for a surprise attack. Before he could take off, he felt the strong grip of his father clamp down onto his arm before pulling him to the ground. The Father let out a growl of disapproval, shaking his head as a way to tell his son to keep himself hidden. Oogar was confused as to why his father would pass up an opportunity for potential meat and fur, especially in a climate such as this, but the young Neanderthal would get his reason when he saw another Mammoth pass by and then another.

Soon, an entire herd of Woolly Mammoths plodded through down the snow-coated grounds as a series of guttural snorts and trumpets escaped their trunks. Due to their small numbers, there was no way for Oogar or his father to carry out an attack on only one mammoth without the rest of the herd retaliating. The duo had no other option but to simply wait out the beasts and continue on their journey through the tundra.

Oogar, however, still wanted to take down at least one mammoth, even just a singular calf would last them for several days. The adolescent gave out a few grunts and snorts in protest but was by a growl from his father, a way of telling the boy to stand down and wait. The younger neanderthal tensed up for a moment before stepping down, giving into his father's demands.

Oogar had turned seventeen months prior to his trip to the snowy plateau and he figured he would be free to hunt on his own but this luxury never came to be. Even after his grueling trial in the cave of darkness, he felt as though his father believed that he still wasn't ready. The adolescent neanderthal wore an impatient scowl while his eyes flicked over to his father, displeased with his decision but nonetheless he abided by his wishes, albeit reluctantly.

Though, even with his thoughts contained, the desperate yearning for freedom was still burning within him.

Waiting for the chance of breaking out.

---

Pentagram City, Southside...

"Alright, let's see here… Return overdue library books, check. Glitter for the new banner, check. Bribe the gophers…" Vaggie said to herself, looking up from the list of errands. She found herself standing before a back alley. In the alleyway, she could make out Husk and a gopher who wore a fedora and necktie, glancing suspiciously from side to side. From the pocket of his new slacks, Husk drew out a wad of souls before carefully handing it to the gopher.

"Here ya go. Should be more than enough." Husk said, his eyes disconnected from the mobster rodent.

"Yeah, yeah. You know the cut for next month, right?" The gopher said, swiping the money from Husk's paw before giving the bills a quick count.

"The usual?" Husk asked, raising a brow.

"The usual." Replied the gopher, tucking away the money. Husk gave a nod in response as the gopher dug into the ground beneath him and hastily fled the scene underground. After seeing the transaction unfold, Vaggie nonchalantly pulled out a pen and glanced down to her list and marking off the latest priority on the list.

"Check." She calmly said to herself.

"Okay, we done now? Because I am already sick of today and only a drink can make this more tolerable." Husk grumbled, exiting the alleyway before approaching Vaggie. "Can't we just make a quick pit stop at a tavern or something? I just want a fuckin' drink…"

"How many times do I have to tell you this, Husk? The answer is no." Vaggie bluntly replied, her focus was mainly fixated on the list as she skimmed through it to see the remaining errands they had left.

"Vaggie, you can't expect me to just haul ass all day while Charlie and her daddy have their little tea party and NOT stop for a drink? Might as well send ya to the nuthouse for thinking of something THAT fuckin' insane!" Husk bemoaned.

"Look, I know you hate it but this is for your own safety. Considering your ties with Alastor, I doubt Lucifer wouldn't be so kind to find out we have been working with the Radio Demon…" The Hispanic Demoness replied, looking up from her list.

"Besides, I can't have you drunk on the job." Vaggie said, folding her arms.

"I'm always drunk on the job, dammit!" Husk retorted, pointing a claw at the gray demoness.

"Keep that up and maybe I will have Alastor take away your scratching post, maybe that will set you straight..." She said, smirking a little at her statement while Husk felt his heart skip a beat. His first thought was to cave Vaggie's skull in but knowing the sanctity of his beloved scratching post was on the line lead to Husk letting out an enraged 'hmph' before he stormed off.

"That's right, keep moving." Vaggie said, following after the feline. On the opposite end of the sidewalk, the rest of the group were hauling large burlap sacks containing thousands of clams. Oogar and Niffty were able to support the large bags, with the former carrying two enormous sacks of quahogs onto his shoulder. Angel, however, was noticeably struggling as he dragged an unbearably heavy bag of clams along the pavement with his lower set of arms struggling to lift it off the ground.

"NRRRGH... Why...uff... in the FUCK...ufff... does Charlie need this many...NRRGH... clams!?" Angel wheezed between breaths, sweat seeping down from his brow while a horrid ache was starting to take place on the spider demon's back.

"Well, Charlie needs it so that Alastor can make his famous clam chowder. Duh!" Niffty explained, happily skipping along the sidewalk with a sack full of clams perched atop her shoulder.

"Oh yeah... uff... I remember that, it was tasty... NRGRGH... It was good until I found an eyeball in my fucking soup!...RGNNGGH!..." Angel growled, his arms weakly convulsing as the weight of the clams was starting to take its physical toll on the poor spider.

"Well, that's what happens when you run out of the clams." The Cyclopean said with a shrug. After a solid minute or two of walking, the trio met up with Vaggie and Husk as Angel set aside his clam sack before slumping against a brick wall to catch his breath.

"I see you got the calms?" Vaggie said, pulling out her checklist.

"You betcha! The market had a sale on clams and fishheads so we're in good luck there." Niffty said before rummaging through the bag, drawing out a fishhead from the sack.

"Hey, Vaggie! Whaddya call a fish with no eyes?" Niffty spoke in a silly tone of voice while moving the fishhead's jaw up and down to simulate speech.

"Fsh!" She declared, her joke being with a stern silence from her colleagues while Vaggie gazed Niffty with a look of both annoyance and confusion. "Get it because-"

"I get it." Vaggie grumbled to herself before leaving behind another tick mark off on the list.

"Vagz, can we at least a SIP of liquor. Because without it, we're nothing! Look into the eyes of this poor, boozeless feline!" Angel said before suddenly pulling Husk by the scruff of his neck before displaying his face before Vaggie.

"AUGH! Let me go, you piece of shit!" Husk said with a hiss before grabbing at Angel's hands in an effort to pry them off.

"Please, Vaggie… Find it in your heart to let us have just a shot of liquor because. Without it, there is absolutely nothing to look forward to here in life. Please… Give not just me but this poor kitten a cha-"

CHOMP!

"OW! FUCK!" Angel's plea came to a sudden stop as he felt Husk bite down onto his hand, a pained cry escaping the spider demon's lips. He quickly pushed Husk away from him, frantically shaking the hand that he bit. Looking at the hand that the feline bit, he was greeted with a few teeth marks punched into his flesh, seeping out a thin line of blood.

"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, MAN!?" Angel snapped at the winged demon, holding onto his now-bleeding hand.

"Don't fucking grab my face then!" Husk retorted.

"I'll grab whatever body part you got and right now, I am gonna rip your cock off!" Angel growled with fiery anger, stepping forward to confront his source of ire up close and personal.

"Try me, slut!" Husk snarled back, clenching his sharp yellow teeth. The two demons glaring at each other's eyes, sharing a furious scowl towards one another.

"Oh yeah, I'll try alright. Because it will sure as hell be hard to find!" Angel said, grabbing Husk by his bowtie before lifting him off the ground. The Alcoholic Doorman didn't take that insult aimed at his junk all the lightly as he grabbed onto Angel's shoulders and viciously tackled him to the ground. This move subsequently led to a fight breaking out between the two, the spider and the feline punching and clawing at each other.

Oogar dropped the bags he was carrying to intervene and stop the scuffle from escalating only to feel Vaggie's hand firmly pressed against his torso as a way to prevent him from taking another step. The Caveman turned to face his caretaker who wore a smile of reassurance on her face before moving her hand from his chest to his shoulder.

"No need to worry about them, Oogar. I'll take care of this." She calmly said before marching into the chaos. She reached forward and grabbed Angel by the hair with one hand while her other hand snatched Husk by his ear. With the two demon's in her clutches, Vaggie slammed both their noggins together resulting in a loud 'BONK' suddenly ringing out for the whole city block to hear. Two large, conical bruises began to form on each respective demon's foreheads as both Husk and Angel dropped to the pavement with a thud. From their perspective, they could see little flying wraiths and demon horses orbiting around their heads.

"Listen up, The Fermented Fruit is just a block away. If we go there for just a half-hour break, will that be enough to shut both of you up!?" Vaggie shouted, her hands firmly clutching her hips.

"Yuh-huuuh…" Husk murmured, his pupils swirling around in circles.

"Ma, the monkeys are eatin' my dress…" Angel yipped, raising his head slightly before dropping back to the floor.

"Oogar, pick them up and carry them for me." The hotel manager said before walking off with Niffty shortly following after. Knowing that having to carry the clam sacks combined with Angel and Husk would be quite a handful for the caveman. However, an idea struck his primitive mind as he opened one of the bags that was spacious enough to fit both demons as he stuffed the cat and spider into the sack.

"Come on, big guy!" Niffty called out, prompting Oogar to collect all three bags as he ran after the two demons while hauling the bags over his shoulder. While being jostled about in the burlap sack, Angel let out a daft giggle that was likely a result of Vaigge clocking him on the head.

"I smell like fiiiiish~" The slutty spider cooed.

"We are the fish. Swim in the blue oceeeean..." Husk woozily interjected.

---

The Fermented Fruit...

In the bustling tavern, the place was jam-packed with patrons, both drunk and sober alike, who came to the establishment to hang out with friends, enjoy some personal R&R time, or perhaps playing pin the tail on the donkey with a passed out drunkard in place of the tailless mule. Either way, The Fermented Fruit was a perfect place for a demon to quaff their woes away. The conversations and mumbles of various patrons rang through the bar walls along with a jukebox dispensing tunes to make sure the bar wasn't always left in silence.

Oogar pushed the entrance door open, letting Vaggie and Niffty enter first. The Mammoth Demon was the last to set foot into the bar if you didn't count Husk and Angel who were still being carried by the neanderthal, as the group made their way over to the bar counter. Vaggie and Niffty both collectively sat on the bar stools while Oogar set the bags onto the ground before taking a seat. The bag containing Angel and Husk shuffled for a moment as the spider's scrawny hand came reaching out from the opening before came slithering out from the burlap sack.

"Huh, who would've thought clams smelt really good. Got a nice ocean breeze to it!" Angel said, stretching a bit before helping himself to a stool. Meanwhile, Husk came spilling out from the back with a few clams falling out along with him.

"Well, no shit. They're from the ocean..." Husk said, picking himself back up onto his feet.

"Besides, I think I might've been laying on a fish head during the trip here." The feline grumbled before looking over his back to see a fish head was stuck to his back. Letting out a sigh of annoyance, Husk tried his best to reach for the fish head.

"Say, Oogar, how's about we get ya hooked up to the sauce, eh?" Angel said, turning his head over to the caveman.

"Sauce? Oogar had sauce before." Oogar replied to Angel's comment.

"Wait, you did?" Angel asked, tilting his head in confusion if he had genuinely meant that or he was onto something ridiculous. "What was it?"

"Oogar did have barbeque sauce. Good drink, very sweet."

"...So that's what happened to that gallon of barbeque sauce," Vaggie recalled before turning her attention to Angel. "Also, no. We're not going to let Oogar drink."

"Seriously, you're that protective of 'em? He's well above the drinking limit if Hell had one that is. 'Sides, he can handle it. If this mother fucker was out here icing saber-toothed tigers, mammoths, dinosaurs, and all sorts of shit then a shot of liquor ain't gonna kill 'em!" The pornstar defended.

"Correction, Dinosaurs went extinct before the stone age." Niffty corrected.

"Whatever! My point still stands." Angel grumbled.

"Well, dealing with a plastered fifteen-foot tall caveman is not on my to-do list, neither is dealing with all of you drunk. So unless you want us to leave early, be my guest." Vaggie said, getting an exasperated sigh from the spider demon as a form of response. Just then, the bartender, came to all five demons to fix them with any drink they needed.

"What can I get ya fellas?" He calmly asked.

"Cosmopolitan, make it snappy." Angel rudely demanded, not even making eye contact mainly because he was focused on checking his nail.

"Whisky." Husk made his request as simple as possible as he slumped onto the counter, his tastebuds desperately crying out for the sweet embrace of alcohol washing over them.

"Oh! Oh! Shirley Temple! Shirley Temple, please!" Niffty excitedly asked, bouncing up and down on her stool out of ebullience.

"I'll have a water, thanks." Vaggie requested, resting her head against the palm while looking off to the side.

"Err... Oogar will have barbeque sauce!" Oogar happily requested, only to get a funny look from the bartender. Vaggie glanced over to the barkeep, managing an embarrassed chuckle while Oogar raised a brow in confusion.

"Does place not have barbeque sauce?..."

"Uh... He'll just have some milk if that's alright." She said to the bartender, who simply shrugged and went off to get the hotel crew their drinks. The behemoth let out a saddened whimper, hanging his head in disappointment that he didn't get the sweet, tangy flavor of BBQ sauce.

"Oogar, it's for the best. Besides, I think you could use a glass of milk after overindulging on a gallon of sauce." Vaggie said to the caveman, giving him a gentle pat on the back.

"But Oogar like the taste! Better than may...o...neighs." Oogar said with a pout while Angel snickered a little from his response.

"I wouldn't mind tastin' your may-" The Pornstar was unable to finish his licentious comment for he felt Vaggie give him a hard smack to the back of his head. head.

SMACK!

"Augh! Seriously!?" Angel yelled, rubbing the back of his head.

"If you keep flirting with him, a slap to the head will be the least of your worries!" Vaggie threatened, her index finger pressed beneath the spider demon's chin.

"There you are again, actin' like that damn neanderthal is your kid!" Angel retorted, pushing Vaggie's hand aside.

"It's nothing like that, Angel. I'm making sure that you don't end becoming a bad influence on him, he's from a different world after all!" The Hispanic Demoness exclaimed.

"Oh sure, just let 'em rip a guy's face off but give me crap for flirting with him. Hey, you want me to get his stroller? I'll gladly push him around the park for ya, I'll even burp 'em while I'm at it!" Angel angrily rambled, Vaggie merely ignoring the spider demon's rant. Oogar, however, looked at Angel with a worried gaze, one that the slutty spider took notice of.

"And what do you want? Need me to get your bib ready?!" Angel impolitely growled, giving the caveman a stink-eyed look.

"Angel look mad. That not good at all... Oogar give you hug!" He said before suddenly pulling Angel in for a soft, warm embrace. At first, Angel tried to squirm his way out of the hug which came complete with yelling and cursing. However, the warmth of the caveman demon's fur coupled with how gentle his embrace is was enough to put the pornstar at ease.

"Nyyymm... Okay, now I'm starting to see the appeal here..." Angel murmured, rubbing his cheek against the caveman's shaggy chest. Seeing this unfold, Vaggie couldn't help but manage a smile while Husk sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Sometimes, you're too pure for hell, Oogar." Vaggie quietly said to herself.

"Yeah, fuckin' adorable." Husk sarcastically remarked, impatiently tapping his claws against the wooden exterior of the counter. Oogar set his sights on the feline demon, tilting his head slightly before reaching out with an outstretched arm.

"Kitty look mad too. Oogar hu-" However, Oogar's embrace never came to be as he felt the cat's claws clamp onto his index finger. The caveman yipped in both pain and fear as Husk starred down the larger demon with a fearsome lour.

"Kitty will turn Oogar into a carpet if he lays a finger on him..." He hissed, letting go of the caveman's hand as he recoiled his arm back and timidly scooted to Vaggie while his embrace around Angel tightened as if he were holding a teddy bear.

"Hey, don't worry about him. He's all bark, he clearly doesn't mean all that..." The hotel manager said, giving the caveman a gentle pat on the back before glaring daggers at Husk, who felt like his soul was being invaded and judged by an unseen force. "...Isn't that right Husk?"

"Uh yeah... sure." Husk said, lowering his ears from the spearwoman's subtle threat. Luckily for the feline, he wouldn't have to wait another minute as the bartender came over to the five demons with their requested drinks. Oogar released Angel from his hug so that he could help himself to his beverage while Husk immediately grabbed the glass of whiskey and quaffed it down with a single gulp.

"Oh yeah, that's the ticket..." Husk ushered with relief, the refreshing sensation of whisky sweeping along his tastebuds like a wave crashing against the shore.

"Yeah, no kiddin'..." Angel replied, taking a good sip of his cocktail while simultaneously slumping forward, resting an elbow on the counter to keep himself from falling over.

"Don't get too comfortable, you two. We're just going to be here for half an hour and I pray that one of you won't start a bar fight..." Vaggie said, taking a swig of ice-cold water.

"Vagz, you know that ain't my style! When have I EVER betrayed your trust?" Angel said, acting as though he was innocent. The Hispanic Demoness lowered her glass and looked at Angel with a blank expression, her cheeks slightly swollen from the water in her mouth. She blinked twice before swallowing the water in her mouth, turning away from the slutty spider.

"...I'm not even going to say anything."

As Niffty finished the last of her Shirley Temple, popping the maraschino cherry into her mouth, she noticed something from the corner of her eye that garnered the cyclopean's full attention. A massive dartboard was situated on the barroom walls where a scrawny demon with a peach fuzz stache and thick glasses was strapped to the center as patrons hurled razor-sharp darts at him, some of which came frighteningly close puncturing scathing his body. Standing by the board was a scrawny imp dressed in a red button-up shirt, a flat-top hat, and a blunt sticking from his mouth.

"Schtep right up and schee if you can hit the weirdo directly in the heart and win this here vintage record player from the 1950s, complete with vinyl records from the likes of Elvis Presley and Buddy Holly, schee!" The imp announced before directing his hand over to the victrola with a stack of record sleeves neatly rested upon it.

"Please, let me go! My princess told me she would let me have free access to her OnlyFan-IEEEE!" His cries were silenced when jerked his body to the left with all the movement he had in his body to avoid a dart that was hurled at him.

Niffty's eye grew to twice the size of her own body height while a long and drawn-out gasp escaped her gaping maw, her hands gripping at her cheeks to the point of bleeding.

"NIFFTY… NEED… NOOOOOOW!" She squealed at the top of her lungs before she turned to Vaggie, gripping at her arm before rapidly tugged on the Hispanic demoness's sleeve.

"Vaggie! Vaggie! Can I play darts? Can I?! Can I!? CAN I!?" She pleaded in a mellow-dramatic manner.

"No!" Vaggie gave a brusque response, hastily pulling her arm away to free her arm from Niffty's clutches. However, she felt the cleaning lady's needle like-hands grab onto her shoulders as she felt herself being wildly shaken back and forth at an alarming rate of speed, the world around her becoming fast and blurry while Niffty's screechy voice pierced her eardrums.

"PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! I NEEEEED THAT RECORD PLAYEEER! I WILL DO ANY HORRIFIC DESIRE THAT IS HIDING IN THE DEEPEST, DARKEST CONFINES OF YOUR MIND IF IT MEANS I GET THAT RECORD PLAYER IN MY COLLECTION! PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEEEEEASE!"

"Okay, fine!" Vaggie yelled, simultaneously removing both of Niffty's hands off of her shoulder. The Hispanic Demoness proceeded to hastily rummage through her wallet before pulling out a crumpled-up dollar bill, haphazardly shoving it into Niffty's palm. "But you're only playing one round and that's it…"

"Yippie!~" The cyclopean demon squealed with joy before running off into the crowd of riled-up drunkards, her dollar raised high into the air almost as though she was proudly waving a flag in the air. Vaggie mustered a sigh of exasperation before turning back to her glass of water, guzzling down the last drops in her glass. Just as she thought she thought she could get a moment of rest, she felt Oogar gently tap on her back.

"Vaggie?…" The caveman said with worry in his voice, which was anything but a good sign for the gray demoness. Turning her head, she was met with Oogar, his whole head now soaked with milk with droplets seeping from the tip of his scruffy beard.

"Are you kidding me, Oogar!?" She groaned with frustration.

"Oogar sorry! There was no drinking stick!" The caveman yelped while Vaggie pulled down on her own eyelids out of vexation.

"It's... It's fine, Oogar. Just let me take you to the bathroom..." The hotel manager sighed, getting up from her stool before grabbing onto Oogar's wrist.

"Husk, Angel, don't do anything stupid while I'm gone." She said before walking off with the caveman, the two demons making their way to the bathroom. Angel glanced over and sneered slightly at the Hispanic Demoness.

"Well, I ain't drunk yet so there!" Angel spat before quaffing down what remained of his cosmopolitan before gesturing to the barkeep for another drink. "Oi, barkeep! Dyin' o' thirst over here! Get me another cosmopolitan before my mouth gets drier than the damn Mojave!"

"Eugh, what kind of amateur booze are they servin' here? I still remember all the horrible regrets I've made." Husk growled, finishing his shot. Overhearing the feline's comment, Angel glanced over to the feline to give him his own sage advice.

"Hey, if you want your mind to go blank but booze ain't doin' it for ya then I got an ide-"

"For the last time, I ain't lettin' you suck me off!" Husk gave out a loud, curt response as he slammed his paw onto the counter.

"I was gonna recommend laying in bed and listening to whale sounds but you're givin' me another idea~" Angel playfully giggled, stroking the side of the cat's cheek.

"Oh, fuck off!" He hissed with annoyance, swatting his hand away while the barkeep filled up his glass with the second round of whiskey. As the two demons had their drinks, little did they know that the tavern would be having another attendee that was just a block away from the establishment...

---

Outside of The Fermented Fruit...

The metallic, rhythmic clacking of sabatons hitting the concrete ground could be heard by just about every other inhabitant of Pentagram City, their iron footsteps marching through the streets like a traveling parade. The culprits of this repetitious noise were an entire platoon of demons with avian features, all of which bored the same set purple and black of armor that resembles the Knight's Templar. Any passerby either stood out of the way and gave them the right to walk the streets while others harassed them by yelling obscenities at them and even throwing garbage at them, although some were unfortunate enough to rub their leader the wrong way...

These armored demons had trudged through the city streets for what felt like hours to them and despite their appearance didn't display a sign of exhaustion, their walk was starting to take its toll. They were hoping at the very least their leader would show them a slither of mercy and let them have a break.

The leader in question was also an avian-like demon, specifically bearing the likeness of a raven, who was noticeably shorter in height compared to his own knights. His attire consisted of a long-sleeved lavender shirt, a pair of dark purple trousers that reached down to his knee caps, and a puffy cravat tied around his neck. His more notable accessories was a magenta cape that was held in place by a pair of black shoulder pads, along with a black and purple opera mask that concealed the top half of the aviary's face.

Glancing around his surroundings, the raven bore a look of disgust to the city that he was wading through alongside his knights. The obnoxious bellowing of the city folk, the bright lights, the many suggestive billboards and shops that were strewn about through the expansive concrete jungle, just from looking at it all made the corvid nauseous. He still had work to do in this wretched city, however, and ultimately he had no other option but to bite the bullet and

"M-My lord? I don't mean to pry, but may I ask you a question?" One of the many knights suddenly spoke up, a hint of worry in his voice. Slightly glancing over to his minion, the raven emitted an infuriated sigh.

"You may speak, Dennis..." The raven replied in a scratchy voice, his back turned to his lackey as if he didn't even want to waste his energy making eye contact with his armored servant.

"Well... uh... We have been wandering for quite some time and we were hoping that we could... y'know? Have a break?..." The Knight sheepishly suggested, his master responded by stopping dead in his tracks which caused the rest of the platoon to come to an abrupt halt.

"Have you gone mad, Dennis!?" The raven squawked, stepping over to the taller demon before yanking him by the tunic of his breastplate so that he could properly meet the taller demon at eye level.

"We have work to do and as much as I loathe this repugnant city, I have no other choice but to dwell in this junk heap of a town!" The corvid exclaimed before wrapping an arm around the back of Dennis's neck so that he could better display the urban environment.

"Just look at these barbaric animals! Dwelling about in this disruptive menagerie, it's outright sickening!" He continued while Dennis took in his surroundings, seeing demons wander the streets. He witnessed demons making out in alleyways, having drinks with friends, attending gentlemen's clubs, living a free life without the worries of responsibility and duty.

"Right..." He sighed with hidden envy.

"Now do you see, Dennis?" The raven said, removing his arm from the knight's neck before shoving him back. "This toxic cesspool is filled to the brim with abhorrent sinner filth that stains this fair city!"

"Well, technically speaking my lord, we're legally required to at least have one break. It's in the union." He spoke up, a small mutter of agreements was passed around from the guards.

"Bollocks! Remind me to execute whoever is behind that blasted union!" He proclaimed, shaking a fist to the crimson skies.

"Uh, the demon responsible for that would be King Lucifer, my lo-"

"AND A BRILLIANT IDEA IT IS! HIS LAW IS ABSOLUTE, YES!" The corvid interrupted almost immediately, an almost nervous smile forming along his beak. His eyes flicked back and forth to find somewhere for his men to rest for now. Noticing the Fermented Fruit just up ahead, he directed his hand over to it. "TALLY-HO, MEN! AS WE TAKE OUR FIRST, ABSOLUTELY LEGAL AND NESSECSARY BREAK OVER TO THAT... ugh... Fine Establishment..."

The knights all collectively shared a cheer much to their leader's charging, as he mustered out a moan of dread-filled exasperation as he thought to himself, "Brilliant... Now I have to put up with mindless sinners in a drunken stupor. Might as well make this a quick one..."

Approaching the entrance, the corvid pushed the door open as he recoiled with revulsion as though his olfactory system had picked up a rancid smell. However, he was nearly knocked over as his men came pouring into the tavern as he quickly grabbed onto a support beam to prevent himself from falling. Glancing to his side, he realized he was standing next to an intoxicated demon, who was slouched against the wooden beam as a raspy chuckle escaped his lips, followed by a waft of his horrific breath.

"ACK! Filthy drunkard!" He growled before socking the demon in the cheek, knocking him out cold in the process as the top half of his body slumped over onto the cold ground. The raven drew back his hand, clutching at it as a minor pain surged through his feathery fist. Shrugging off the pain, the raven continued through this tavern of unsavory repute, cautiously stepping over passed-out inebriates. Just then, a succubus stepped in his way with a condescending smirk plastered on her face.

"Well, well... hey there, shortcake. I wouldn't mind having a taste of your bird seed~" The lustful demon said with a giggle, reaching down to scratch the underside of the raven's beak. The avian-like demon furrowed his brow before promptly whacking her hand away from his chin.

"Back away, you repulsive trollop! I have no time for and even if I did it would be publically execute you!" He shouted before storming off to one of the bar stools, ignoring the succubus cussing him out.

"Besides, I already have my sights set on someone who is far beyond the likes you troglodytes..." He muttered under his breath before helping himself to a seat by the bar counter while most of his men also sat upon the bar stools or rested on nearby tables. Much to the avian-like demon's dismay, he had to share the counter with sinners. Normally, this wouldn't be an issue as long as they were silent and kept to themselves but the two demons he had sat next to were aggravatingly chatty.

"Alright, so what's the most insane thing that you got dragged into when you were alive?" Angel asked Husk, who finished his shot of whiskey.

"Huh, good question. I got into a whole bunch o' crazy shit in my life that picking just one would be hard as hell." Husk replied, looking up from his glass before gesturing over to the bartender for another shot.

"Though if I had to pick, I remember one time when a few pals and I went off to South America for some drug peddling just to make a few quick bucks. We had time to kill before shipments were made so we decided to have a game of Texas Hold'em." Husk recollected, his glass was refilled with a new douse of usquebaugh.

"Alright, so what happened?" Angel inquired, raising a brow.

"Well, one of my pals, Harry, was a heavy drinker. Like, way more than me. In fact, he was plastered before we started the game." Husk said with a bit of chuckle, downing his shot. "Anyways, things are pretty tame for the most part but then we suddenly got approached by a band of Coatis, probably because of the food we left out. Y'know what those are right?"

"Yeah, yeah. They're basically uh... South-American raccoons, garbage stealing and everything right?" Angel answered.

"Mhm, right on the money." The feline continued on with his story. "Anyways, there are about like twenty of these Coatis, right? They're all over the place and Harry, being more piss drunk than an elephant, decides to harass them."

"Ooooh, I already know where this is going." Angel snickered.

"So, he's doing everything to intimidate them. He's chasin' them around, throwing rocks at them, all that sort of stuff. But then, he pulls out his gun and waves it around in the air like he's fuckin' Tinkerbell..." He remarked with a slight chuckle, the bartender pouring the winged demon his umpteenth helping of the water of life.

"He pulls the trigger and BANG!" Husk exclaimed, swinging his arms out with exaggeration. However, the moment he spread out his arms, the liquid came flying out from the shot glass and came spilling onto the corvid that sat next to him. The raven-like demon screeched with displeasure from the sudden spill as he frantically flapped his wings before suddenly slipping off of his stool, awkwardly fumbling onto the floor.

"They all start ripping and biting at his face as he rolled all over the ground, screamin' like a banshee. Now, we did try to get the coatis off of 'em but we did it in the worse way possible and by that, I meant that we shot at them. With one such bullet going right into his ass." The winged demon said, almost desensitized the absurdity of the situation. Though his words were enough to make Angel cringe with disgust, as he tightly grabbed onto the sides of his bar stool.

"Oohohoh damn, even for me, that would have sucked…" Angel said with a hint of discomfort. Pushing himself back onto the ground, the avian-like demon looked down at his clothing with noticeable splatters of whiskey staining his lavender tunic. Snarling with contempt, the raven looked up to see the culprit who had stained his shirt, head turned the other way like he hadn't even noticed that he ruined the corvid's shirt with his splash of booze.

"Oh yeah, you have no idea. After we scared 'em off, one of us had to dig the bullet out of his butt with a knife since that's the best we had. Anyways, the guy had a good part of his face bitten off and from that point on, we all called him Half-Face Harry." Husk said, his ears twitching slightly for he heard what sounded like the buzzing of a fly zipping past his head.

"So what happened to him after that?" The slutty spider asked.

"Eh, haven't heard from him in a while. Though I did hear that he might be part of some circus sideshow now. Hope that goes well for him." Husk said with a shrug before suddenly feeling something poke into his shoulder

"Hey, you!" a screechy voice squawked, garnering the attention of the alcoholic feline as he turned his head over to see a smaller, raven-like demon glaring at him with an unwelcoming scowl.

"Yeah, the fuck are you bothering me for?" Husk asked with ungraciousness, not in the mood to deal with whatever conflict that this avian was trying to stir up. A look of shock surfaced on the corvid's face, almost as though he recognized Husk, however his expression would morph back into a scolding glout.

"You soiled my garments with your beverage, you uncouth drunk inebriate! I'll have you know that these clothes are made of the finest silk that the Lust Ring could provide and costs more than the chump change you make in a year!" The raven exclaimed, pointing a feathery finger at the feline.

"Either you pay me back or I will have my men turn your pelt into a carpet!"

"Actually I got a better idea for ya, why don't you suck off a few dollars from daddy and buy it yourself ya upper-class shitbag..." Husk snarled with fury, flipping off the corvid with his middle finger proudly displayed before his eyes.

"Ah! How dare you do insult me in this barbaric fashion. Don't you know who I am!?" He proclaimed.

"You're a bitch is what you are!" Angel suddenly chimed in, stepping in front of Husk to confront the raven. The Spider Demon leaned forward to better meet the smaller demon in height in an almost degrading fashion.

"So he spilled some whiskey on ya, boo fuckin' hoo! Ain't the end of the world so why don't 'cha grow a pair and a spine and get over it ya feathery fuckface."

"Get those disgusting paws away from me, you street-dwelling jackal! I'll be damned if I catch one of the many STDs swimming about in your hideous form!" The corvid retorted, fiercely slapping Angel's hand away before quickly recoiling back. Tending to his hand as if he had touched something unsanitary.

"Awwww, what's the matter? Can't get a chick in bed because of your puny lil' pecker so you gotta take it out a guy who's gotten better game than you? Quite low for ya, but then again, you're low enough as it is." Angel chortled, patting the raven demon on the head. The Corvid's face began to turn visibly red, his body shook with fury and feathers started to frizzle up.

"You conniving, eight-legged…" Words were incapable of describing the corvid's rage, his fury incapable of finishing his insult as he turned to his men and with a snap of his fingers, all of whom cocked their heads over to their master. The avian demon directed his hand over to Angel and Husk, routing out the origin of vexation by dramatically pointing a finger at them.

"Guards, remove your tail feathers from your seats and assemble! Unsheathe your blades for I ask of vengeance! I demand that you butcher these villains for their insolent mockery and bring me their heads so that I may bedeck my fireplace!" He screeched, his shrill voice almost stabbing into the eardrums of his men.

"Jeez, just say 'kill them' dude. It ain't that hard." Angel remarked, undermining the fact that his life was in danger. A few of his men gave out an exhausted sigh, saddened by the fact their 'me time' was cut short. But nevertheless, they obeyed their leader's commands as they stood up and drew forth their swords. Seeing the knights unsheathe their weapons, the bartender stepped forward to prevent this potential bar fight and potential public disemboweling from unfolding.

"Hey, you're not allowed to-"

"Dennis." The raven sighed and in the blink of an eye, an arrow suddenly came flying right past the bartender's cheek. The arrow's sharp head barely nicked him across the cheek as it pierced into the wall behind the barkeep. The demon's eyes widened and his pupils shrunk as he glanced over to the raven, one of his guards pointing an arm-mounted crossbow at him.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Do you want to join them too?..." The purple-clad demon taunted with a light smirk etched on his beak.

"...Do as you please. Feel free to spill their guts on the floor anytime." The barkeep said, fearfully backing away before sprinting off into the other direction.

"That's what I fucking thought." The corvid scoffed before shifting his focus back to his main targets. Despite the fact that they had swords and daggers pointed in their direction, Husk and Angel remained in their seats. What was even more baffling was the fact that they were continuing their casual conversation.

"So, if you wanna hear a batshit insane story, I got one. So, my brother and I pulled up to this abandoned warehouse to take care of some business." Angel continued his story, pretending the armored guards approaching them weren't even there to begin with.

"Okay, what happened?" Husk inquired. Growing annoyed by their behavior, one guard approached Husk and grabbed onto his shoulder with a tight grip.

"Listen, we don't have time for this crap. Either you repay our lord and that will be the end of it. Continue to waste our time and we will use for-"

The knight's threat came to a sudden halt when Husk grabbed onto the back of his helmet, his claws leaving behind small yet noticeable scratches in the metal exterior, before slamming it straight down onto the edge of the counter with a surprising showcase of strength. Upon hitting the counter, an enormous dent was left in the guard's helmet along with a sizable wooden chip breaking off the counter. The avian-like knight fell to the ground like a sack of potatoes, the rest of his troop looking on with shock and awe from what had just happened.

"Will you shut the fuck shut up!? The man's trying to tell a story here!" Husk snapped at the downed guard, nonchalantly turning over to Angel as if nothing had happened. "Sorry 'bout that, err… Go ahead."

"Grrrgh! Dennis!" The masked corvid cried out to his lackey, who was already loading his crossbow with a new bolt.

"On it, my lord." He said with minor annoyance, extending his arm out with his wrist-mounted crossbow aimed for the two demons. Dennis proceeded to fire off an arrow that was aimed for the feline demon's head. But right before it could make its mark, a pink gloved hand snatched the projectile out of the air. Beneath his helmet, a dumbfounded look surfaced on the knight's face, one that was shared by the rest of his troop, as Angel ogled the arrow with an unimpressed look. After a brief inspection, Angel smirked before hopping off of his seat.

"Seriously? Arrows? In the modern-day?! Nah, that ain't the way to do it…" Angel chuckled with flippancy before snapping the head off with a push of his thumb. He threw away the broken arrow before reaching into his pockets. "Here, lemme show ya how things get done in the modern era!"

Right after finishing his comment, Angel whipped out his trusty dual Tommy guns. Fully loaded and ready to blast his foes into hamburger, the entire knight platoon, and their leader all seizing movement upon laying eyes on the spider demon's firearms. The raven demon gulped, knowing what was about to happen.

"Oh. Bollocks..."

RATATATATATATATATATATA!

Bullets came spewing out from the gun's muzzle, the whole flock of troops frantically scrambling into the different directions to avoid having a bullet claim their life. Angel laughed like a maniac, firing bullets until the gun's cartridge was empty. A handful of avian knights were either killed on the scene or hid behind tables and chairs while their armor served as thin protection from the bullets. Witnessing the chaos take place, Husk casually reached for his shot glass and took a hearty sip.

"DIE, YOU GUN-TOTTING HUSTLER!" The raven screeched before hurling a throwing knife once the gunfire had stopped. The small blades zoomed through the air with their razor-sharp tips focused directly on Angel's forehead. The Slutty Spider nimbly spun around the blade, which was now hurling straight towards Husk instead. But in another surprise, Husk grabbed onto a bar coaster and brought it up to his head, only separated by a couple of inches, letting the blade embed itself into the beermat. Thankfully for Husk, the beverage coaster was just thick enough to prevent the knife from taking the feline's eye out.

"Eh, might as well get in the action too." The Winged Demon shrugged before tossing the beermat before twirling out a revolver, taking aim, and firing off at the corvid. Yipping with fear, the raven demon took cover behind a support beam while the bullet grazed the wooden exterior. Soon, a barrage of arrows, bullets, and knives soared through the air, hitting knights and unfortunate bystanders alike. Unfortunately for one guard, his aim was way off as not only did he miss his target, his arrow traveled across the bar and towards the center of the enormous dartboard. The arrow's sharp head embedded itself into the creep that was tied to the board as he croaked with pain.

"N-NO!... My... girlfriend's boyfriend...was going to let me...have her panties for an hour..." He uttered before his body went limp.

"Well, ain't that schomethin'? Looks like that random knight who wasn't even part of the crowd ovah 'dere wins the prize!" The sleazy announcer proclaimed, pointing a finger at the avian knight. The avian-like demon overhead carnie's words, albeit not quite clearly due to his helmet.

"Huh? I win what now?" He said with confusion. Unbeknownst to the knight, he had made a fatal error in his misfire. When he fired the arrow, it was Niffty's turn and as she warmed up, the knight's unintentional score landed him the prize which didn't sit well with the cyclopean one bit. Her singular pupil shrunk, veins began to take form on her massive eye, and a twisted smile manifested on her features.

In a fraction of a second, Niffty appeared right before the guard, her whole face taking up his entire field of vision. The knight was fearfully confused from the sudden appearance of the cyclopean maid, who casually swayed to her side to let an arrow fired by one of the guard's fellow men strike his breastplate.

"Steal my prize, eh?..." She unnervingly said before drawing out an abnormally long broadsword that she somehow had the strength to carry with just one hand. "WELL HOPE YOU DON'T MIND SHARING!~"

And with a sudden spin, the guard's head was cleanly sliced off from his neck as both his decapitated head and body struck the ground with audible 'THUD'. An entire quagmire of blood gushed from the knight's neck, painting the floor red within seconds as another guard attempted to skewer Niffty with a jab of a spear. The smaller demon was far more light on her feet as she whisked to the side, the spear jabbing into the wooden floor, giving Niffty the perfect time to strike as she plunged the broadsword into the guard's chest.

With another show of inhumane strength for a demon her size, she somehow lifted the knight off the ground before sending his lifeless body careening into the attacking troop, knocking them all back. One of them slammed back-first into the jukebox, knocking over onto its side in the process. While Niffty was busy with the other guards, Husk and Angel fired ceaseless rounds of hot lead into any guard who was unfortunate enough to stand in their way before their ammo ran dry.

With their firearms devoid of bullets, Husk darted to the nearest table and flipped it onto its side to create a makeshift barrier to protect himself and Angel from a stream of arrows, causing half-empty beer glasses and pretzel bowls to fly onto the floor, shattering instantly. One avian knight realized that both demons had run out of ammo and soon took his chances as he dove over the bar counter and charged towards his two adversaries with his claymore in hand.

However, the guard wouldn't get too far as he slightly tilted his neck up and screamed with terror to see a spear flying into his eye. The spear's head precisely lodged itself into the eye slit of the helmet, puncturing the demonic guard's eye in the process.

The knight didn't have a moment to even give out a peep as he was suddenly knocked to the ground as the spear further deepened into the guard's orbital cavity to a point where it came jutting out from the back of his head. The spear didn't stop there, as it the jagged head perforated through the helmet, the guard's eyeball skewered on the sharp tip. Standing above the dead knight was Vaggie, a visible scowl worn on her visage, her hands tightly clutching the shaft of her spear.

"Angel..." Vaggie asked in an unnervingly calm tone of voice, wrenching her spear from the avian's torso before turning to the arachnid. "WHAT IN FUCK'S NAME DID YOU DO!?"

"Nothin'! I didn't start it this time and I legitimately do mean it!" Angel said, extending out a hand as the spearwoman harshly yanked the Pornstar back onto his feet. Gazing over from the support beam, the raven's eyes widened upon laying eyes on the Hispanic demoness before it devolved into a scowl of fiery disdain.

"Whatever, I'll deal with you after we're through with this..." Vaggie snarled before her eardrums were assaulted with a piercing voice.

"Foolish harpy! YOU STAY OUT OF THIS!" The corvid yelled, flinging a throwing knife before the spearwoman could turn around. Suddenly, the ground began to shake before a sheet of rock suddenly tore its way through the wooden floorboards, shielding Vaggie from the oncoming blade as it bounced right off its hard surface. The corvid had to rub his eyes to assure that he wasn't seeing things but the wall was there, standing in front of him.

"What the fu-"

THWACK!

In another unexpected turn of events, something large pushed the rock wall with an incredible showcase of strength as it zoomed forward into the direction of the raven, striking him dead on. The stone slab didn't stop there as it came tearing through the bar, pushing the corvid along with it before its journey across the tavern came to an end once it reached the front window. Upon hitting the window sill, the raven was jettisoned through the glass. The purple-clad demon was sent skidding into the middle of the road, his body covered in glass shards and scuff marks.

"Uuragh..." The corvid groaned, shakily lifting the upper half of his body off the ground. He coughed out a few matters of blood, his arms struggling to keep himself supported. The hotel residents, the corvid's guards, and just about everyone who was present in the Fermented Fruit all silently watched from the newly glassless window with wide-eyed expressions.

"Damn-" It would be long before a car suddenly flattened the corvid like a pancake, zipping down the road while a noticeable pair of tire tracks was now scorched into the clothing. The raven barely released a wheeze of agony, one of his legs now pointed upwards as it twitched and convulsed.

"...It." He quietly sputtered. The hotel residents all collectively turned their heads over to Oogar, standing in the center of the bar with his arms folded while a snort blew through his beard. However, his hard gaze turned to that of worry as he turned to his group with a hand on his head.

"Errr... too far?"

"...Okay, we should leave." Angel mouthed to his team.

"Agreed." Husk said, prompting the whole group to turn around... only to be met with the remaining pissed guards that had survived the ordeal, their armor battered and scratched.

"Oh yeah, forgot about you guys." The spider demon groaned with annoyance. Wanting to exit the establishment as fast as he could, Oogar hoisted his leg and stomped onto the ground that resulted in a small-scale tremor that shook the whole tavern in the process. The guards, unprepared for this sudden move, all toppled to the ground with some even being sent flying by the explosive force of the temblor. Looking up from the counter, the bartender's jaw dropped when seeing the damages that had been inflicted on the tavern. From the corner of his eye, he noticed the hotel residents making a beeline for the exit door.

"Hey, get back here! I ain't payin' for all this!" He yelled before a crisp, hundred-dollar bill flew right into his face with a surprising amount of velocity.

"There, now shut up!" Angel yelled before he, alongside his crew, vacated the bar in seconds. They all bolted down the street as fast as their legs could provide but unbeknownst to them, the raven slowly rose to his feet before pulling out a small hand-held device.

"You mongrels aren't going anywhere..." He snarled with hatred, pressing one of the many buttons that were displayed on the remote. The hotel residents were unable to get far enough as a purple and black limousine suddenly came screeching around the street corner before peeling towards the group.

Stepping in front of his group, Oogar slammed his fist onto the ground prompting a massive rock wall to rise from the pavement. Rather than hearing the tires screech followed by a crunch of metal, instead, the caveman was treated to a mechanical whirring much to his confusion. Above the rock wall, the limousine dove towards its targets, now sporting a pair of wings that protruded both sides.

"Shit! Other way!" Vaggie before her whole party hastily turned around in the opposite direction. Once the limo's tires hit the ground, the wings retracted back into the roof of the car before chasing them down the street in hot pursuit.

Waiting for them at the other side, the raven smiled devilishly as another limousine swerved into view. The whole group had no other choice but to stop dead in their tracks as the two vehicles from both ends were starting to close in. Everyone braced themselves for the worst but once the two vehicles came into close proximity of the Fermented Fruit, both limos collectively swung themselves in a horizontal formation, effectively boxing their targets in. The doors to both limos swung open and out stepped units of avian knights, all armed to the teeth.

To make matters worse, what guards that were still standing in the Fermented Fruit all trudged from the shattered window like a shuffling crowd of zombies. Soon, the hotel residents were surrounded by nearly thirty to forty guards that all had their sights set on them.

"There, now I have you animals right where I need you." The purple-clad demon said, standing upright much to everyone's shock and surprise.

"Look, I don't know what this idiot did to piss you off but you better let us go right now!" Vaggie threatened.

"Gee, thanks for the support there. Really appreciate it..." Angel groused, folding his upper set of arms.

"Bah, as if I would let lowlife sinners such as you walk away alive! Especially after what that shaggy oaf did to me..." The blackbird retorted, pointing a clawed finger at the caveman.

"Even then, you hooligans have proven to be a bigger problem than I thought..." The masked corvid proclaimed, turning to his remote control before clicking a series of buttons." Luckily for me, I have ways to deal with insolent curs like you!"

From the rooftops above, a singular raven that appeared motionless on an HVAC unit craned its neck up as a bright light flickered in its eyes. Spreading its wings out, the raven lifted itself off the ground before taking to the skies. Flying into the scene in a circular pattern, a scraping-like noise vaguely produced every time it flapped its wings.

"Tch, that's it? You sent a bird after us? Oh, I'm really scared. Hope it doesn't peck me to death!" Angel sarcastically remarked. Unfortunately for him, as well as the rest of the gang, the spider demon should've learned to keep quiet because soaring out from the horizon and into the scene was an entire conspiracy of ravens, circling the area as if they had found a fresh carcass.

"Oh no, I've seen a movie like this before and I only have one eye! You birds will never get my eyes, NEVER!" Niffty shrieked with terror, covering her singular eye while the rest of the hotel residents looked on with a small tension washing over them.

"...Okay, so you sent a bunch of birds after us. Is that all ya got, Alfred Bitchcock?!" Angel barked, aiming his cartridge at the unkindness that would soon be dropping dead to the ground. With his sights directly pointed to the sky, Oogar squinted his eyes and noticed something off-putting about the approaching flock.

"Those... are not birds..." Oogar said to himself aloud, the spider demon overhearing the caveman's bizarre observation.

"The hell you talkin' about? Of course they are, what else would they be?!" Angel said to the mammoth demon while Vaggie craned her neck up to see the unkindness heading for them. Drawing closer, a mechanical whirring buzzed through the air. It started off faint but grew more clearer as the unkindness descended into the scene.

"Oogar's right, Angel... Those aren't any birds." Vaggie said with a hint of worry in her voice.

The Hotel Manager's intuition would prove correct as the mechanical scraping plagued the group's ears. The feathers of the birds began to shed away from their bodies like a snake shedding an old pair of skin, revealing a metallic exterior. The metal plating was black in color, bedecked arrangement of purple, vine-like patterns that ran along with the ebony shell. These mechanical corvids all moved in a synchronous fashion, soaring overhead in a circular formation.

"Drone technology, impressive isn't it?" The corvid said, his arms folded behind his back in a patronizing manner. "Normally, I never address my name to downtrodden sinner trash like you..."

"But considering the trouble you've given me, I want you to know my name for it will be the very same name you'll cry out as I watch you shrivel up and die..." The raven said, glaring upon the hotel residents with crystal clear disdain.

"Honestly, I don't care what you're name is. It's always gonna be King Fuckface in my book!" Angel snapped at the corvid demon, who merely ignored him as he opened up both his arms while a murder of drones began to circle around him.

"I am Lord Malphas of The Ars Goetia Family, Son of Raum, The Grand Architect of Hell, The Machine Master, The Mightiest of the-"

"ALRIGHT, WE FUCKIN' GET IT!" Angel suddenly interrupted the raven demon's strident introduction.

"Do you need all those fuckin' titles to make yourself feel big!? 'Cuz if so, it ain't gonna be fixing your body in two ways!" Angel yelled with impatience, having zero time to listen to the corvid drone for hours. Malphas cocked his head over to Angel, snarling with anger as one eye began to twitch.

"You know what? Fine! Have it your way. YOU SINNER FOOLS ARE DOOMED!" Malphas exclaimed as the unkindness of drone ravens glared down at the hotel crew while several Malphas's guards had them surrounded in a circle. Despite the fact that any potential route for escape was blocked off and their numbers were low compared to Malphas' forces, the sinners stood strong.

"Do you honestly think we wouldn't come prepared for something this? Your ego is really something..." Vaggie scoffed as she drew forth her spear with its jagged blade pointed at Malphas's head that stood before her while Oogar clenched his fists, letting out a determined snort before smacking his chest. Angel and Husk both collectively drew forth their firearms, Four Tommy guns laid in Angel's clutches and two dual pistols in Husk's.

"Oooh? You're actually going to fight back, are you? This should be amusing..." Malphas said devilishly before he too unveiled his own weapon, a pair of iron claws with each tip filed down to a razor-sharp point. An uneasy silence took hold of the streets, if one side were to attack right now then a full-on war would surely ensue. The jukebox, despite the beatings it had taken in the barroom brawl, was still active enough to emit a tense larghetto of percussion and guitar before the fervent voice of Charles Bradley filled the air.

"I try..."

Vaggie and Malphas both starred each other down, a burning hatred for both sides was clear in their expression. Patrons and staff opted to stay out of the conflict, with the fight garnering some unneeded spectators while other demons elected to ignore it.

"Hey, Rawl!"

Angel's finger was wrapped around the trigger, just seconds away from blowing his enemies into hamburger meat.

"I try to be a righteous man."

Husk's glare went hard, a droplet of sweat started to fall down his cheek while the grip around his pistols was beginning to tighten dramatically.

"I try to give love all over the world!"

Just then, Malphas raised a hand to the in the air before swiping it down in a chopping motion that would be his lackey's cue to attack.

"I'M TIRED OF BEING USED!"

"ATTACK!"

In a matter of seconds, lasers and arrows alike were airborne from all around, prompting everyone who wasn't a drone or knight to make a move and fast. Oogar slammed his foot onto the ground, causing a cylinder-shaped barrier to encompass his party before the projectiles could hit. The arrows rebounded off the stone barricade, the drone's lasers however proved to be much more potent as they drilled through the rock barrier, forcing the hotel residents to throw themselves into different directions to avoid being obliterated. From outside the barrier, Malphas grinned with sadistic glee, believing that his drones had offed his opponents but his hopes would be crushed as the cylinder-shaped formation suddenly exploded outward. A hailstorm of rocks flew outwards, showering streets as drones were knocked out from the sky and Malphas's knights were crushed.

With the laser fire temporarily ceased, the hotel residents saw this as their moment to strike back. Oogar punched his hands into the road beneath him. The earth began to encrust around his hands as the caveman yanked his arms from the pavement, now sporting a pair of rock gauntlets. The caveman raced forward and started swinging, each knight that came into Mammoth's direction was sent flying with bones and armor cracking from the dangerous force his strikes provided.

One guard, wielding a halberd, was brave enough to confront the shaggy giant by jabbing the longe-ranged axe's spike in his stomach but the caveman blocked the blow by shielding his abdomen with his hands. Thanks to the craggy exterior of his gauntlets, the spike snapped off with ease as Oogar proceeded to grab onto the halberd's blade before snapping it right off with a tight grip, metal fragments that once comprised its head now sprinkling on the ground.

"...Shit." The guard muttered under his breath before his life ended with an overhead swing that came falling onto the top of his head. The impact of Oogar's gauntlet caused a massive dent to form along with the overhead of the metal as well as sending the guard's eye sockets, bits of brain matter, and geysers of blood to spray from the helmet visor as his body lifelessly flopped onto the pavement. Reeling his foot back, Oogar kicked the knight's corpse into an approaching group of his fellow men, all of which were knocked to the ground like bowling pins.

Oogar would've continued on his rampage, not before feeling a powerful burning sensation strike him in the back, one that got out a pained snarl from his maw as well as forcing him onto his knees. As the pain stopped, Oogar looked over his shoulder to see one of the many drones hovering above him with its eyes gleaming white, readying for another blast. Oogar's eyes widened as he quickly bolted himself away from a blinding beam of light as the caveman booked away from the robotic avian, which soon gave chase along with three more of its mechanical brethren.

Angel mowed through guard after guard, his bullets tore through their armor and ended them on the spot. The Slutty Spider cackled like a madman but much to his dismay, the roar of his Tommy gun turned into useless clicks as the ammo cartridge emptied all its bullets.

This caught the attention of a few drones, as well as a guard or two, as laser fire rained down from the sky. The Spider Demon narrowly side-stepped several more blasts before swiftly ducking to avoid a sword swing that was aimed for his neck. The knight raised his sword and swung it down only for Angel Dust to suddenly catch him by the wrist, keeping the sword in place. Noticing one of the drones was charging up for a blast, Angel stepped back while simultaneously tugging the knight forward the moment the robot's eyes emitted the beam. Instead of blasting a hole through the arachnid's head, it instead tore through the knight's arm, severing it from its body.

Witnessing his arm being amputated, the avian screeched with terror but would silence instantly as Angel jabbed the guard's own claymore, which still had his amputated hand still grabbing onto the handle, puncture through the bevor and sink deep into his throat. Unbeknownst to Angel, a knight attempted to stab him behind with a dagger but just as he could plunge the blade into his shoulder, Husk came right out of the blue while Niffty was clinging onto his back.

The feline knocked him to the ground with a shoulder check and before the knight bring himself back up, Niffty leaped off of her companion's shoulder, withdrawing a halberd that she had stolen from one of the other guards. Swinging it down with all her might, the knight's body was split into two bloody halves.

"Hey, you alright?" Husk said

"D'awwww... You saved me, how thoughtful~" Angel cooed, pinching the bartender's fluffy cheeks.

"Hey, get 'yer damn outta the gutter! Will ya?!" Husk barked, whacking Angel's hand to the side.

"Right, right. Let's get to work then~" The spider demon said with a chuckle, promptly reloading his Tommy gun.

"Mr. Alastor is gonna be SOOO proud of me!~" The Cyclopean Demon said with murderous exuberance, bolting forward with adrenaline coursing through her veins. Gleefully raising her blood-soaked axe, Niffty looked on at the approaching knights that were ripe for the slaughter. The first knight that came into her range didn't last a second as Niffty furiously swung the halberd in a sweeping motion, cutting down the guard to size, quite literally speaking, as the axehead carved through his legs. The top half of his body didn't have a moment to hit the ground for the cleaning lady kept it elevated by thrusting the halberd's spike into the poor sap's abdomen.

She didn't stop there, Niffty was just getting started. Still pumped with murder-happy excitement, the cleaning lady bolted as fast as her spindly legs could allow. Moving at speeds that at first glance, appeared as a red and gold blur zooming through the battlefield. With the halberd still in her clutches, Niffty held it up as any soldiers who were unfortunate enough to stand on the receiving end of the spike were skewered on the halberd. With every guard impaled, her blood-hungry exhilaration sky-rocketed.

SHINK!

"This."

SHINK!

"Is."

SHINK!

"So."

SHINK!

"Much."

SHINK!

"FUN!"

The halberd was now a demonic shishkabob, several of Malphas's men impaled on the shaft. The spiked head now sported a fresh coat of blood, crimson strands of flesh and viscera dangling from the razor-sharp tip.

"YEEEE-HAWWWWW!" Niffty shouted, for the whole entire seven circles to hear. Bending her knees for a split second, Niffty sprung herself high into the air. Surprisingly, she wasn't weighed down by the guard-skewered halberd she was carrying, the cyclopean even spun around in circles to avoid oncoming laser fire from the drones. Reaching the apex of her jump, Niffty raised the halberd over her head and drove it downwards with all strength in her arms. The cyclopean descended towards the ground with the spike pointing towards the ground.

Standing in the way was an unfortunate guard who was at the wrong place at the wrong time as the halberd's spike pierced through his helmet and plunged into his crown, his brain skewered in the process. The avian knight dropped to his knees, his upper body still supporting the guard-impaled halberd while Niffty marveled at her demented equivalent to a modern-day art piece. Though, she would be unable to gawk at her gory masterpiece for too long as she drew forth a large needle and giddily darting back

Reloading their guns with fresh ammunition, Angel and Husk prepared themselves for an approaching troop of knights that were advancing towards them from every angle. Husk aimed his pistol at a charging knight, only to realize that his firearm was depleted of bullets. As the guard came closer, Husk switched to his next best option as he stepped to the side to avoid a sword swing before trapping his attacker in a headlock. With his foe ensnared, Husk began the process of furiously bashing his pistol against the avian's skull. Angel covered the feline, gunning down any poor armored fool that had the gall to approach them.

After brutally pistol-whipping the guard to a point where his head split open and the crown of his helmet wore a large indentation, Husk was about to throw the guard's to the side only to suddenly hoist it up to shield himself from an oncoming laser blast from up above. Thanks to the reflective surface of the dead guard's armor, the laser rebounded off his breastplate, drilling through a crowd of his fellow knights as they all dropped dead to the ground.

A small unkindness of Malphas's drones attempted to strike them from the sky, charging up for an optic blast only to be shot out the sky by Husk, dropping to the pavement with a loud 'CLUNK'. Despite his efforts into downing the flying robots, several more took their place as Husk sighed with annoyance, spreading his scarlet wings out.

"I'll take care of the robots. Think you can handle these guys?" Husk said, turning to his arachnid acquaintance who had just finished blowing a guard's brains out through the back of his helmet.

"Trust me on this one, baby..." Angel said with a smirk before his lower-set of arms drew forth two new weapons into the fight. A spiked club in his left hand and a sawed-off shotgun in the right. "I'm always prepared to fuck shit up~"

With the knowledge that his partner would do well without him, Husk took to the crimson skies as he fired several more shots at the mechanical corvids. The raven drones bobbed and weaved out of the speeding bullets, retaliating with optic blasts that prompted Husk to spin to his side, barely avoiding the light beams by a hair's length. Husk decided to take things to an up-close approach as he trusted himself forward towards the drones, all of which sent laser fire into the winged demon's direction.

The Doorman swooped over the oncoming beams before suddenly spinning around in mid-air. Before the drones had a chance to disperse, they were all knocked out of the air by a sudden tail-whip as they plummeted to the asphalt below, their eyes going dark the moment they struck the pavement. H

Vaggie went straight for Malphas, swinging her spear with a mix of elegance and ferocity. The corvid had no other option but to bob and weave out the direction of each attack but the Goetia would retaliate the moment Vaggie recoiled her spear, shooting himself forward with a set of iron claws that suddenly protruded from his sleeves, swinging them in a swiping motion.

By pure instinct, Vaggie rolled back to avoid having her throat unexpectedly sliced open but this didn't stop Malphas from mounting an assault of committed slashes. The Hispanic Demoness was quick to respond, bringing up her spear before swiftly parrying the bulk of his assault with her spear's shaft. Aside from a few cuts that etched themselves into the exterior of the handle, the spear didn't break as its weirder swung the handle, striking her purple-clad adversary right in the cheek.

The brunt of the attack sent Malphas off course as he fumbled back while bits of porcelain flew off from his mask. Vaggie blitzed forward, jabbing her spear with intention of skewering him through the stomach. Malphas jerked himself out of harm's way, avoiding the spearhead by a hair's length. Malphas zipped back to stay out of the Hispanic demoness's range as he sent forth a series of throwing knives, all of which were aiming towards Vaggie's face and torso.

With a flick of her hands, Vaggie countered the knives with blades of her own, each and every one of them was knocked out of the air. Vaggie proceeded to chuck an extra throwing knife that was aimed for Malphas's abdomen, prompting the raven demon to quickly spring himself into the air. The corvid plunged himself downward, the razor-sharp tips aimed for Vaggie's cranium. This cued Vaggie to pull herself back, letting the raven strike into the ground while his claws pierced into the asphalt below.

Seeing this as her chance to strike, Vaggie lunged herself at the raven demon and whisked her spear in a diagonal formation. The attack made its mark, the spear's jagged edge tearing through the raven's tunic, carving across his flesh leaving behind a large gash along his body. Malphas shrieked with agony, grasping at his fresh wound before jerking his head up to face Vaggie with an infuriated

"You dare draw blood from me with your primitive tools!?" Malphas rebuked.

"I didn't. You just have poor reflexes." Vaggie commented, further enraging her foe.

"GRRGH!... I'LL EVISCERATE YOU FOR THAT, VAGATHA!" The Goetia roared before immediately clasping his own beak shut, realizing the critical mistake that he made. Vaggie raised her brows in surprise, aghast by the fact that this raven somehow knew her name.

"How do you know my name?..." She inquired as beads of sweat started to dribble from the raven's brow.

"Well uh... the thing is... quite a riveting tale, you see-DIE!"

VEOOOOOOOM!

From crimson heavens, a drone fired upon Vaggie with a laser beam, forcing her to quickly pull herself back before several more began to swarm her. While his drones were busy, Malphas booked it to the nearest limo as he dove into the passenger seat, his arm haphazardly reaching for the lock nob.

Oogar zagged through the battlefield, unintentionally trampling knights that attempted to storm him in hopes of avoiding the pesky drones. However, they were a lot more persistent compared to Malphas's goons meaning Oogar to come up with a plan to get rid of them. Oogar's first approach was sending out a barrage of stalagmites that rocketed from the ground as if they missiles as they flew towards the drones, but much to the caveman's chagrin, the robotic birds all weaved around the flying rock spikes.

The Mammoth Demon emitted a guttural snarl of rage before ducking bellow to avoid a laser blast. Knowing that attacking from below wasn't going to get him anywhere then he needed to up the ante. Just from the corner of his eye, he noticed one of the limos that had locked him in this chaotic warzone as an idea began to present itself in the Mammoth Demon's mindscape. Dodging several more laser blasts, Oogar leaped towards the car as he slammed both his feet onto the ground. The moment his feet slammed onto the pavement, a wall of stone spires that were slanting to the right jutted from the ground, striking the underside of the limo with enough force to launch it into the air.

The limo was successful in crashing into the attacking drones, with only one that was lucky enough to dodge the flying vehicle. Angel, faced against a charging herd of knights, wearing his sharp-toothed smile with his finger ready to squeeze the trigger.

"Alright, ya feathery fuckers, you want a piece o' me! 'Cause I go-"

KRRRRNNCCCKK!

Angel didn't have a chance to finish bravado for a limousine fell from the heavens and landed directly onto the squad of guards, flattening all of them in the process. Angel's smirk shifted to a dumbfounded expression before he stomped on the ground with frustration.

"Goddammit! I planned that monologue out for days!" Angel whined before quickly offing a guard that tried to sneak up on him from behind with a headshot.

Watching the frenzy from the safety of his limo with both horror and vexation, Malphas witnessed his guards and even drones were being whittled down to zero by these sinners. After the fatal error he made, he couldn't send in more guards and drones in to draw more unwanted attention. Pulling out his remote control, Malphas pressed a red button before speaking into a built-in speaker.

"Dennis! Call for a retreat, right now!" The corvid demanded, his captain responding to him instantly.

"S-sir! Are you sure? And where are you?" Dennis asked, his eyes darting across the battlefield to route out his master.

"I'm in the limo, you fool! I uh... I was totally owning one of the guys but then I got stabbed or something..." Malphas lied shamelessly, timorously looking out from the window.

"Look, just call the damn retreat and get in the limo already!" He anxiously barked.

"RETREAT!" The avian knight called out, his kinsmen all stopping dead in their tracks from hearing the captain's word. Practically relieved that such an order was carried out as they all collectively sprinted towards the vehicle in a matter of seconds. The limousine's engine roared to life before it suddenly spun into the opposite direction before tailing off, leaving behind noticeable tire marks that were scorched into the asphalt.

The music that had been echoing through the duration of the scrap had dimmed down, leaving only the noises of faint sirens and uncomfortable silence. Though, Angel's screechy voice would unexpectedly fill the air.

"Hey, get back here! We ain't through with ya!" Angel yelled, firing off at the limousine with his Tommy guns. Sadly, the vehicle manager to leave the scene just in time as Husk descended back onto the ground, holding a squirming drone in his paws.

"Eh, I say leave 'em. No use in chasing 'em down." The feline said with a shrug before casually ripping the drone's head off. Niffty walked by the duo, coated in the blood of her enemies, taking in great breaths of air.

"You know, I'd be disgusted but man... That was amazing."

"Finally..." Vaggie sighed with relief, almost toppling onto the ground as she jabbed the shaft of her spear onto the concrete to keep her elevated. Taking a good minute to catch her breath, Vaggie fully rose to her feet before sheathing her spear.

"Goddammit..." The Hispanic Demoness muttered to herself, knowing the consequences that were awaiting her and the gang once word spread to her girlfriend. "Charlie is going to kill us."

"Well, howzit feel to stoop down to my level?" Angel exhaled, cracking his neck. Vaggie rolled her eyes with annoyance in response to Angel's snide comment, however, a thought that she had put aside during the battle had returned to her mind.

"I still don't understand... That demon, how in the hell did he know my name?" She asked herself.

"Hell if I know, but as much as I wanna answer that thought-provoking question, we gotta bounce before shit REALLY hits the fan 'ere." Angel said, tugging at Vaggie's shoulder.

"Pretty sure things have already went south about... Twenty minutes ago." Husk interjected, placing his hat back onto his head before dusting off traces of debris that took refuge on his fur, and slacks. Oogar trudged through the battered streets towards his crew, knowing that they had to leave as soon as possible. Just then, he felt something metallic hit against his shin as he looked down to see one of Malphas's many drones laying about on the road.

Out of curiosity, the caveman reached down and picked the robotic bird off the ground. He continued onward, his eyes affixed to the robotic avian that was in surprisingly good condition, save for a few dents along its exterior. Moving his hand underneath the drone's wing, Oogar felt a finger graze a button that was hidden from plain sight. Intrigued by this accidental discovery, Oogar pushed the button resulting in the drone to inexplicably hum to life before opening its 'beak'. From inside the beak was a small speaker, one that emitted Malphas' grating and scratchy voice.

"Audio Log, Number Eighty-Four. The current is date is November 29th, 2019." Malphas informed, the audio slightly garbled and staticky. Amazed by this sudden discovery, Oogar darted over to his companions to show them what he had found lying in the rubble.

"Hey! Hey! Come here!" The caveman called out, earning the attention of his companions.

"There you are, big guy. C'mon we gotta go!" Angel cried only for Oogar to display the raven drone before his group.

"But look! Look what Oogar found!" The behemoth exclaimed as Malphas's message played through the drone's speakers, just loud enough for the whole group to listen in on.

"Once again, I had to squander several more hours of my time into constructing Lucifer's confounded amusement park... Constantly kissing Rosy-cheeked fool's boot all the time is a grating task but nonetheless as long as it gives me a good reputation and a fine seat in Hell's hierarchy.

"It's an audio recording?..." Vaggie said, raising a brow in surprise as she reached out and gently took the drone from the neanderthal's hands so that she could hear the message at a much clearer frequency.

"Though, funnily enough, Mammon actually approached me the other day and told me that he was planning on making his own theme park... By blatantly ripping off Lucifer's, but he said it was no bootleg at all, plus he paid me heaps of money so obviously I knew I could trust him. He simply wanted me to make a robotic clone of one of his little money magnets, Ravioli or... whatever his name is. Obviously, he was impressed with my technological skills and engineering, which are clearly superior to any other wannabe 'inventors' Hell has to offer. Especially that blasted snake and his oval-shaped ghouls... But I digress, as I continue to waste my time and energy on these inane projects of theirs, I truly wish the lords of hell would get their heads out from the stink-ridden gutters and see that technology doesn't ALWAYS have to be about entertainment. It can be done for something much, MUCH bigger than that!"

"Hey, we don't got time to listen to some rich kid's confession tapes. We need to get the fuck outta here, pronto!" Angel exclaimed but his demands were ignored by the rest of his team.

"Angel's right, Oogar. We have to leave this place right now-" However, Malphas's voice buzzed through the microphone yet again, cutting her off.

"Of course, I still know the reason why I kiss Lucifer's boot whenever the time presents itself. Her…"

If Vaggie wasn't listening, she sure as hell was paying full attention to the recording. While not truly spoken, a part of the spearwoman began to dwell on a horrific conclusion. One that turned her blood cold and her stomach tied into her knots, Angel's frustrated pleads were essentially dulled out to her. Though, it wouldn't be long for Angel to listen in as a horrific revelation was waiting to read its ugly head from the corner.

"Yes, I remember seeing you standing by that fireplace. That party at Lucifer's castle, you were a diamond in the rough. Amongst those disgusting animals that I have no choice but to share my breath with, you were truly remarkable. You were the one and only demon that was only meant for a righteous prince like me… The moment I laid eyes on you, I knew right then and there that you were the one to fulfill my needs. Your rosy cheeks, your porcelain-like skin, your fiery blonde hair…"

An uncomfortably long and drawn-out moan of rapture droned through the speakers, a gut-wrenching sensation was collectively felt among the hotel residents. While a name wasn't dropped, the disturbing reality was beginning to make itself apparent.

"Ooooh, Just the thought of you alone is more than enough to arouse the passionate desires that burn brighter than the stars themselves. But alas, I am forced to repress due to my status and it's all driving me to near madness… Even then, patience is key and I have plenty of it. I've heard of that delusional plan she had with that idiotic hotel but I know it won't last. For you see, I have my own ways of dealing with these sinner freaks myself..."

"Okay... that was kinda fucked." Angel said, unsure of how

"Wh-what could he mean by this?..." Vaggie thought to herself aloud, pulling one of the drone's wings to find two more buttons that were embedded in its side. Unsure of what each button's function was for, the spearwoman took a leap of faith and pressed a small red button. As soon as she pushed it, A screen began to present itself on the drone's chest, slowly pulling itself open. The small monitor suddenly blinked a white flash before transitioning to an unfocused shot of a vaguely familiar setting. But as the screen slowly began to shift in focus, the quality improved and depicted what the camera was eyeing.

What Vaggie saw next would lead her to fight against the visceral reaction to vomit, her blood turned ice-cold, her body froze like a statue. Angel felt the same horrid feeling that twisted his stomach into knots, Husk and Niffty were quite perplexed for trying to come with a proper response to this seemed impossible. Confused by their reactions, Oogar looked over their shoulders to see just what it was that prompted this aura of revulsion.

Depicted on the screen was Charlie, comfortably snuggled up in her bed. Unaware of the hidden eye that was viewing her from afar.

---

Music:

Ain't It A Sin - Charles Bradley