Anastasia

Talking to Kate has me in knots. As I sit with her on my living room couch, I find myself staring at her, searching her face like it is going to tell me if she'd tell anyone if I admitted my relationship.

"Ana... say something. All you're doing is staring."

My phone pings and I pick it up off the arm of the couch to look.

Christian: You got this, baby. You two have been friends for half your life. She might not take it great at first, but give her a minute to settle. She loves you. Call me later. X.

My sweet Christian. I never knew how sweet and affectionate he could be, but I'm soaking every second of it up. Fuck. I have to tell her.

Sighing, I pull my feet under me and reach for my tumbler of iced coffee. Coffee soothes the soul and I'm hoping that it'll give me the courage to tell her and to say the right things.

"What happened on Saturday? That was such a weird day for us." Kate asks.

I wet my lips. "I know." I let out another sigh. "I need to explain why I got so frustrated and angry with you, but if I do, I need to know that no matter how you feel about it, you aren't going to tell anyone. Anyone. If I tell you this and you tell anyone else, I'll have to walk away. That being said, do you still want to know?"

She already looks like she got hit with a ton of bricks and I haven't even told her my secret yet! After she blinks a few times, she finally nods. "Yes. If something is going on with you, I need to know about it. This sounds serious."

"It is. I need you to promise me that you won't tell a soul."

"I promise, scouts honor. I won't tell a soul." She holds up her three middle fingers like we used to in girl scouts.

"Okay... great." I take a deep breath. "Well, you know how you said I had a secret when I came back upstairs?"

She smiles. "Yes! So you are with Christian!"

I bite my lip. "Yes. But that isn't all."

Her eyebrows raise. "It's not? What else? You can't be pregnant cause you were drinking."

"No, no. Definitely not pregnant." I blow out another lungful of air, feeling like my chest is going to be crushed. Kate is going to be the one crushed. Not only am I going to tell her I am seeing the man she has a crush on, but that he's one of two. It sounds so greedy.

"Spit it out, Ana! I'm going to pee my pants if you don't!"

"I'm seeing his brother, too." I wince.

"His brother? Elliot? Elliot! You're seeing both of them? Like... dating both of them? Do they know?"

My mouth drops. "Yes, they know!"

"Don't act offended! You just admitted that you're seeing two men... brothers... Mia's brother's and I can't ask if they know? Fuck. Elliot, Ana? Why?" I clench my jaw. She's heartbroken. "Did I do something wrong?"

"What?" She's taking this personally! "This doesn't have anything to do with you, Kate. I have feelings for both of them and they have feelings for me."

"So... what? So you just fuck them both and they're okay with it?" Angry Kate.

"Technically, I haven't slept with Elliot, yet. But-"

"You haven't?"

I shake my head. "No, we're still new."

"Then step back."

I think my jaw is on the floor. "Excuse me?"

"If you loved me, you'd step back! You already have Christian and now you want to slut it up with a man I've had feelings for for years? And it was pretty damn obvious he had feelings for me, too, because he flirted all the time. Until lately. Now I know why."

I am shocked beyond words. I have to sit and let my anger settle for a minute. "If I loved you, I'd step back? If you loved me, you wouldn't ask me to! I have feelings for Elliot!"

"But what if he has stronger feelings for me and didn't act on them because he didn't know they were reciprocated? It isn't fair to whore yourself around when there are real feelings at stake."

"Stop calling me those names! I was a virgin when Christian and I slept together! I am in no way any of those disgusting words! Just because I'm committed to two men instead of one does not make me some scarlet woman! And if you truly think that Elliot has or had feelings for you, then I'll ask him. If he admits it, I'll do what you want. I'll step back." My heart breaks just saying it. I feel so strongly for him already. It would kill me to see him with Kate. Getting a little taste of what Kate must feel right now, I decide to pick up the phone right now to call him.

"Ana..."

"You wanted to know... so, we're going to know."

I ring him on speaker and he picks up on the second ring. "Hey, Sugar. I've missed you, baby."

I take a shuttering breath in, feeling my heart break already. "I've missed you."

"What's going on?" He sounds worried. I must have sounded a little too whiny.

"I have a question for you and I want you to be completely honest. I won't be angry at you or anything."

"Oookay? This doesn't sound too good."

"It might be what you're looking for though. You might be relieved. So, just be honest."

"I always will be, Sugar."

A bittersweet feeling warms my chest. I find that I am actually really scared he's going to confirm what Kate had said. "How do you feel about Kate?"

"What do you mean?"

"Do you have feelings for Kate? And if you do, how would you feel if you found out they were reciprocated? Do we need to stop what we're doing so you can have your chance with her?" My lip trembles and I have to cover my mouth to suppress a sob. I am so surprised at how hurtful this is to ask. My feelings for him are much stronger than I realized.

"What the fuck, Sugar? No, I don't have feelings for her. I don't have feelings for anyone except you. I've been so god-damned wrapped up in you that I barely even notice other women. Where is this coming from?"

Kate grabs the phone out of my hand, but I don't fight her. Tears are now falling and I squeeze my eyes shut while I cry into my hand. These strong emotions hit me so hard, I don't know where they're coming from, but I need to calm the fuck down. I went from being terrified to tell Kate, to being angry at her, then heartbroken over Elliot, and now I'm back to terrified that he'll find my questioning so immature that it disgusts him and he'll walk away.

"Elliot, it's Kate. It's my fault. She had the guts to tell me what was going on between you three and I took it badly. I hadn't realized how strongly she felt about you and now she's trembling on the couch in tears over it. I feel fucking terrible. Please don't be angry with her. It's my fault." Kate squeezes my shoulder while I try to center myself and get my shit together.

"Let me talk to her."

Kate hands me back the phone and I take it.

"Sugar? You there?"

"Yea." I try to sound like I haven't been holding tears back, but it comes out rough still.

"Baby, I'm not angry with you. I hate that I can't be there for you when you need me. Come over tonight. We'll order Chinese and watch a movie and pop some popcorn. We'll do whatever girls do when they're upset."

I can't help the laugh that comes up. "That sounds perfect. I'll bring some ice cream. Ice cream and tears just go together." I wipe at my eyes.

"Noted. I'll see you around six?"

I clear my throat. "Yea, six is good."

"See you soon, Sugar."

After hanging up, I turn toward Kate and she launches herself at me. "I am so sorry, girl. You really have it bad, don't you?" She squeezes me in a hug and I'm so confused at this point, I don't even know what to think or say.

"I don't know how to fix you and me." I admit, causing her to pull away, but she takes my hand. "I was upset that you brought Cameron up in front of them on Saturday even though you had no idea it would be a problem and then you realized I kissed Christian and I felt like you were trying to out us to everyone by daring me to kiss someone, that I purposely picked Elliot because I knew it'd piss you off. That was so terrible of me. I was salty and made poor judgements. I'm sorry I hurt you... and on purpose!" Now I'm crying again. "I'm a terrible friend."

"You are? Hell, Ana. You're right. I tried to out you to everyone. That's terrible. I actually asked you to stop seeing Elliot because of my stupid little crush. You're so laid back about it all I didn't think... well, it doesn't matter. You showed me how much you care about him... and how much you care about me for calling him even though it hurt you so bad to. If anyone deserves to enjoy two men, it's you. Although, I don't know how you can enjoy Mr. Brooding. Sometimes I wonder if he's a sociopath the way he just stands there. He never smiles."

I giggle. "He is not a sociopath. He smiles with me. He's just a loner. There is nothing wrong with that. But with me, he's sweet and caring and possessive and growly."

"Growly?" Kate laughs.

"Yes, he gets all growly and demanding and it's so damn sexy."

"You are smitten. I can't imagine Christian sweet."

Smiling, I grab my phone and pull up his last text message to show her.

"Well, shit, he was kind of right, but I think I took it worse than I should have."

I shrug. "If you didn't have feelings for Elliot, I think it would have gone better, but I honestly thought you'd scream that I was crazy and disgusting and stomp out."

Her eyebrows knit together. "I do think you're a little crazy for dating brothers, but you aren't disgusting. I'm sorry I called you things that you aren't. You're right. You are committed to both of them. Do you think you can keep up with them?"

I laugh. "I hope so. I think so. Christian says I'm insatiable, so..." I shrug.

"Damn. Get it girl!"

I roll my eyes. This girl was just asking me to step back from one of them and now she's rooting me on.

"Do you think you and Elliot will do the deed soon?" Her eyebrows wiggle.

"I don't know. I want it to be natural. Our last two dates have been out and the thought of planning on going back home to do the deed had me chickening out."

"Did you plan it with Christian?"

"No. It was at his house after our first dance lesson. We just sort of ate face and he carried me to his bedroom."

Kate grins. "Well, you'll be at Elliot's house tonight. Maybe it'll be brown chicken brown cow time."

My head falls back in a laugh. "Maybe but I don't want to think about it cause I'll chicken out about even going!"

XxXxXx

When I pull into Elliot's driveway, he's already sitting on his front steps and pushes himself up to come greet me. By the time I grab my handbag and ice cream from the passenger seat and stand, he's in front of me and picks me up below my bum, making me laugh.

I wrap an arm around him and grip his hips with my thighs so I won't slip. "Nice to see you, too." Shutting my car door, he gives me a grunt. "Oh no, I've got growly and grunty!"

He gives me a playful scowl on our way to his front door and giggling, I kiss his lips. "Hi."

Shutting the front door behind him, he searches my face. "What happened today?"

I wrinkle my nose. I don't want to jump right into it, but it's probably for the best. He places me on the counter and I reluctantly release his neck so he can put the ice cream in the freezer for later.

Coming back to me, he nudges my legs open so he can lean against the counter between my legs. His arms go around me and he rests them on the counter, leaning on his elbows. His face is an inch from mine and his hazel eyes are mostly brown today, with green around the edges. He presses a kiss to my lips and I pout a little when he pulls his lips off mine too soon.

He grins. "There's plenty of time for that, but I want to know what happened today. Why did I get a phone call in the middle of a jobsite asking about my feelings for another woman?"

I wince. "I'm sorry. I know it was immature. But Kate... she had asked me to step back from you because she has feelings for you and said you had feelings for her too because of the way you treated her. She said that I needed to step back so that you two could be together. I... I didn't want either if you to miss out on that if you really..." I shake my head and look down. My heart aches just thinking about it.

"You'd walk away?"

I bite my lip. "I don't want to, but yes. It's only fair. You two deserve to be happy."

He takes a deep breath in and breathes out through his nose, the warm air blowing the loose hair around my face. "But you have feelings for me?"

"Yes. A lot of them."

The right side of his mouth quirks up into a grin. "A lot a lot?"

I giggle. "All of them."

He hums. "I love that. I feel the same. I never want you to question my feelings again. If anything changes, you'll be the first to know. There is no secrets here. I'm too old for that shit. I'm not here to play games, Sugar. I am committed to you and only you."

"Gosh... and I love that."

His kiss is soft and sweet, surprising me because he's always been more of a passionate kisser. Experiencing this side is satisfying.

"We'll order some Chinese delivery and then we'll eat it on the couch with a movie."

Smiling, I nod. It's everything I need right now. Being with Elliot this evening is the reassurance I need. I know I shouldn't need it, but my heart is so sensitive when it comes to my two Grey men. They've become my weakness.

After we order the food, he tells me to come look through the movies to watch. When he steps away, I frown.

"Um, excuse me."

He looks over his shoulder and then stops. "Yes?"

"I think you're forgetting something."

He looks confused, but I reach my arms for him, making him laugh and smack his forehead. "Silly me. I forgot you're incapable of walking." He picks me up and kisses my nose. "Better?"

I grip his shoulders. "Much. And if you wanted me to walk tonight, you shouldn't have set the bar so high when you came rushing to my vehicle to pick me up. Now it's expected. For tonight, anyway."

"I'll carry you anywhere, Sugar." He kisses my nose again, making me scrunch it.

"So cheesy... but luckily for you, the cheesier it is, the more I swoon."

XxXxXx

"I still can't believe you chose a Fast and Furious movie." We just got finished with our Chinese and we're curled up on the couch together.

"Why? I love the cars, the action and all the muscles." I wiggle my eyebrows. "I've got Vin, Paul, and Sung to look at."

"Damn. You don't discriminate, do you?" He teases me.

"They're all yummy in their own ways."

He cocks an eyebrow at me. "I better be yummy then."

"Sooo yummy, baby." Grinning, I give him a chaste kiss. "Even yummier than them."

"Right answer." He pulls me into a laying position and he curls up behind me, nuzzling into my neck.

"Aren't you going to watch?" I'm entertained.

"You watch. I'm enjoying you." This makes my heart do that pitter-patter thing that takes my breath.

I shimmy to my back, being careful not to fall off the couch so that I can get a good look at him. He gives me a grin that makes the corner of his eyes crease.

"Beautiful." He runs the back of his fingers over my cheek and that mixed with the look he's giving me is sending jolts of pleasure straight to my core. I want him so fucking much.

Tipping my chin up, he gets the message and his mouth lowers to mine, his hand running up the length of my side. It feels possessive and needy with the way he grips my ribs right under my breast, his thumb against my underwire.

"Please don't stop." It's a whisper against his lips when I sever our kiss and he groans at my words, his body pivoting to lay halfway on top of me. I really like his weight on me.

I pull his lips back to mine and his hand slips back to my waist and then under my shirt. I suck my stomach in and giggle against his mouth when his light touch tickles my tummy. His hand continues up, pushing my shirt up with it. When it hits my bra, his fingers slip under my underwire and his thumb caresses my nipple, making it harden even more. We both groan at the contact and he presses his hard-on into my thigh.

He severs the kiss and pushes my bra up, my breasts falling out below it.

"Fucking perfect, Sugar. I need more." His head dips down and a long moan comes from me when his tongue comes out to lap at my nipple. When he takes me into his mouth and suckles, my hips shoot up.

"Elliot..." I whimper his name, but I don't know what I'm asking for. I'm already so wet and there's a throb between my legs that I want him to fix.

He switches breasts while his hand kneads the one he just worked and I start to pant. "Elliot... Elliot!" I know that stirring. Am I really going to orgasm just from this? Fuck, I hope so. A release would be phenomenal right now. "Please don't stop." My thighs clamp together and I shift. It's enough. My head falls back and my body shakes as he stimulates me through it.

"Incredible. So responsive. You're such a sensual creature, baby."

"I..." I pant. "I've never... I didn't know... that's never happened."

He smiles down at my flushed state and kisses me. "It's never happened with me either, but I can't wait to make you do it again." He pushes himself up.

"Where are you going?"

Bending over, he yanks me up and throws me over his shoulder. "We are going to the bedroom. I'm not about to let our first time together be on a damn couch." He smacks my backside, so I reach up and pinch his.

Going up the stairs over someone's shoulder is a trip. I was expecting to slide off and tumble down, but he held me tight. Once we're in his bedroom, he sets me on my feet and has my top and bra off in an instant and working on my bottoms.

"I need to bury my face between these legs, Ana. Christian bragged how good it is and it's my turn."

"Yes, please." I love oral and I'm not too proud to beg for it.

Yanking my jeans and panties down together, he drops to his knees and before I can even step out of them, his face is shoved between my legs, his tongue slipping into my slit. I jolt when it hits my sensitive clit. He groans into my center before he pulls back and helps me with my bottoms. He throws me onto his bed with a smile and when he comes after me I stop him with a foot on his chest.

"Too many clothes, El. Naked first then you can have your treat."

He licks his lips but yanks his clothes off, his foot getting stuck in his pants, making him fall into the bed.

I giggle. "Smooth."

He gives me a cheeky grin and mixed with his mussed hair, it does funny things to me. My eyes run down his gorgeous, muscular, tattooed body until my eyes land on his massive length.

"Good to know your cock matches the body."

He grunts. "Can I have my treat now?" He pushes my thighs open and leans in, taking what he wants from me. The fact that he didn't wait for my answer is so damn hot. One of my hands slip through his hair while the other grips the bedding below me while he works me.

The way he eats me is like a starving man getting his hands on a nice juicy steak. It's so damn intense and different. Christian is slow and methodical, working me up until I'm clinging to the edge, waiting for him to push me over. It's intense in a different way. Elliot is passionate and aggressive, making me thighs shake around his head as he works. Fuck. I don't know which one is better. I love them both. I suddenly find it so fascinating that their personalities are completely opposite to how they have sex. Christian is hard and intense in nature while Elliot is laid back and smooth. For some reason, the switch up just makes them so much sexier.

"So good, Elliot. So damn good." I grip his hair.

"You do mewl like a kitten." He murmurs into my center.

"Just don't stop. I'm going to come, Elliot. Please let me come." I grind into his face and when he sucks my clit, I'm a goner.

He kisses his way back up while I pant. I want his cock in my mouth. I want to thank him for pushing me over the edge twice already. His cock is so thick and long, I probably won't get much more than a third of him in my mouth, but I know I can make his head feel good. Before I can ask, his cock is at my opening and he pushes his head into me, making me moan.

"Fuck. So tight, baby. You feel like heaven." He thrusts more of himself into me with a groan.

"I was going to ask for your cock in my mouth."

He grins down at me and drops down on his forearms so he can kiss me. "Next time. I want this cunt."

I moan. As much as I want to be embarrassed, I do love dirty talk. "It's yours, Elliot. Please. I want all of you."

Growling into my ear, he thrusts the rest of himself into me and I cry out, my whole body erupting in goosebumps. He's good at the growly thing too.

He reaches for my hand and entwines our fingers before bringing the back of my hand to his lips. I think I just soaked the bed just with that. Our hands rest between us, below my chest and I reach up to cup his cheek with my other hand while he thrusts hard.

"I love you on top of me like this. Pinning me down with your hips while you take your pleasure." My center clenches around his member at the thought. His eyelids droop and I love watching the look of desire in his face. For me.

His hips pick up the pace and I pull my knees up, letting him slam into me. I know I'm being loud. I'm moaning and crying out with almost every thrust, but he feels so fucking good, that I don't care. When he pivots his hips, I get louder.

He nibbles on my ear. "Scream for me." He sucks on the skin of my neck as he pistons into me and I do exactly that... not that I really have a choice. So fucking intense. It only takes a few more thrusts before I come again for him and he finds his release with me, grunting my name. My actual name. Ana. Not sugar, not baby. I love that.

We lay, curled together, our noses grazing each other's.

"How do you feel?"

I smile. "Amazing."

He looks relieved. "I wasn't too rough?"

"Beautifully rough. It felt good. Really good."

He sighs. "Good. Sometimes I get wrapped in the moment."

"Mmm, I like that. I'd like you to do it all over again... later. I need rest first." I giggle and then wince. The movement caused his cum to leak from me. His smirk tells me he knows.

"We'll shower later. I want to hold you for awhile first."

"Yes, snuggling is always a must afterward."

He kisses my lips. "Noted, Sugar."

My lips turn up into a smile, taking in his face. "Your eyes. They're blue. You didn't tell me they turn blue with sex."

His eyebrows knit together. "The don't."

I bite my lip, trying to hide my grin. I like this. I hope they do it again next time.